it feels like the average true crime fan's perception of a cult involves like. wearing hooded robes and doing sacrifices
When in reality actual cults are mormons. Like figuratively and literally. Mormonism is used as a basis for a lot of cult tactics, and cults will always try to be outwardly well-meaning, respectable, and polite, until you either mentally or physically are too reliant on the cult to leave. Every major cult does this and it was pretty much pioneered by mormons
cults are often framed as satanic and sinful and are presented in opposition to normative christian values in pop culture and yet in reality cults look and act very christian. really makes you think.
i got baptized in a christian flavored cult a few years ago. my boyfriends sister was spending all her time at this church, and we and their parents were concerned because she was talking about moving. so we agreed to go to a service and check it out. it was late at night, and i mean like 9 pm, but i was like whatever maybe its a youth group. it was in a rented office space in a building, but maybe their church is under construction. it didnt take long to hit me that it was a cult. as soon as we walked in, my boyfriend and i were separated. they took us to two separate cubicles with whiteboards and explained about how the bible predicts ww3/the apocalypse, which is coming soon, and only members of their church will be saved. if you are separated from the person youāre with and have lots of information thrown at you so rapidly you dont have time to disagree, late at night, in a nondescript rented office space, you might be tired enough for it to make sense. then they get to the part where a random korean lady is god, and also i have to be baptized or im going to burn in hell. i did it, cause it doesnt matter to me, and my boyfriend did as well. then we left, told the parents it was definitely a cult, and left it to them to get her out, but just because i walked out of the building doesnt mean they let me go (and trust me, they did NOT want us to leave that night, i called bullshit and said iād had enough and power walked out of there dragging my boyfriend). multiple times a day, every day, for literal years they called and harassed me.Ā āif you dont go to this gathering then you arent really saved so you have to come backā, anything they could do to get me back in the door. but they werent pushing kool aid or matching uniforms, or talking about how we were aliens who needed to die to go on a spaceship. it was what looked like a very strange flavor of christianity, if you didnt look hard enough. he and i broke up and i guess her parents gave up, because she ended up giving the church all her money and moving 1000 miles away from her parents to live in church housing. it is very, VERY easy to get sucked into a cult, especially if you are going through a difficult and isolating time (like a global pandemic). his sister is not someone i would describe as wacky, or stupid. she was lonely, and sad, and a cult saw a victim and grasped its claws around her.Ā
(i actually went to an LDS service this year with a visiting friend who is mormon-im trying to be supportive because screaming ITS A CULT at someone is not a good plan-, and it is like.... boringly insidious. almost like a regular christian church, except the first hour is listening to people talk about how they couldnt survive without the church and they would be nothing without the church and the church is their entire support system- if you hear this at ANY meeting or service, run)
It doesn't look like a cult bc nobody joins a cult. They join a support group, a church, a social media circle, a club.
They look like two nice looking young men coming to your door and telling you about their holy book, and no haha, weāre not a cult. They invite you to the monthly social, where there is free food! You meet a cute person there. The missionaries tell you read your scriptures, and come to church every Sunday, because are nice people your age there (and that cutie)! Two people from church come over to your house each month with a nice little spiritual lesson, and they always bring brownies. Don't doubt your faith, don't look at outside sources, and we love you so much.
Come to the monthly community service projectsā that cute person is there, are you just started dating. Weāre so glad youāre gaining a testimony! We have a food pantry to help you make ends meet. Donāt listen to why others left the churchā they have been influenced by satan. The family is so important to us, which is why you will all get to be together in heaven!
Come to the extra Saturday classes. Give us 10% of your income and blessings will rain down from the heavens. Plus, that 10% goes to building temples and feeding the hungry! Now that you give the lord money and abide by our rules, you get to go to the temple. Your partner is excited for you, and tells you that itās kind of weird what they do in there, but they donāt talk about it because itās sacred.
Wear the underwear we give you, go to the church college because it has really cheap tuition. One of them has an acceptance rate in the 90 percent! Your date is going there, too, so you apply and are accepted. You pray before every class and the doctrine is in every lesson. We love you so, so much than anyone else could.
You get engaged to that cutie, and together you go to the after church lessons to prepare you to be married. Only other church members can come inside the temple where you are going to be married, so your non-church friends and family members have to wait outside. You are wed in the temple in a cold white room.
But little inconsistencies are adding up. You finally read what the others are saying about the church, and now that you have both sides of the story, nobody in the church will listen to you. They tell you to read your scriptures, pray, and confess your sins to the bishop. You cannot.
Your family is giving you sympathetic looks and whispering behind closed doors. āIt's so sad theyāre having doubts. If they leave they won't go to heaven with us. But theyāll come back around eventually; we just have to keep preaching to them.ā
You tell your partner that you might leave the church, and your spouse says they cannot stay with an unbeliever. You can decide to go and have your community and family overhauled, or stay with the comfort of a support system. Your conscience demands that you go. Your spouse serves you with the divorce papers, and they are adamant that it is your fault.
Your family keeps texting you pithy quotes like āgod loves youā and āeverything happens for a reason.ā Missionaries come by every month to try and bring you back. Church members show up unannounced with cookies and little cards with palatable scripture quotes. You take your contacts out of the church records, but someone in your family keeps giving them your address. None of them will own up to it. You see on social media that your ex-partner is already engaged to someone with āproud church memberā in the bio.
You have dreams set in your church because you spent so much time there, nightmares that you're trying to leave but can't. This end of joining a cult looks like losing your faith and being gaslit and lovebombed and finally forgotten (if you're lucky). It looks like the hardest thing you've ever done.
