𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐉𝐀𝐄

ᴊᴜɴɢ ᴍɪɴᴊᴀᴇ (ᴩʜᴏᴇɴɪx) • ɴᴏᴠ 17ᴛʜ, 2001 (22yᴏ) • ꜱᴄᴏʀᴩɪᴏ • ɪᴅᴏʟ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀʙᴇ

ʙᴀᴄᴋɢʀᴏᴜɴᴅ

» jung minjae (stage name phoenix) was born on a crisp autumn day in seoul, south korea, 22 years ago. from a young age, she showed sheer passion and talent for ice-skating, which set her on the inevitable trajectory towards becoming a professional athlete. » only child, grown into a poor family, since the first moment they got a glimpse of their daughter's talent her parents saw in it a mean for a better life. this led them to inevitably put a lot of pressure on minjae's shoulders and to do everything they could to push her towards the right path. whether it was because of her own passion or because of their influence, minjae soon started cherishing the dream of reaching the top, of getting to the olympics. » since the age of ten, when she started winning more and more competitions and gain enough prizes, her parents decided to home-school her so she could fully focus on her career. this led her to miss out on a lot of childhood and teenage experiences and to grow up way too quickly. eventually, this ricocheted the moment she had to drop out her sport. » at the age of sixteen, indeed, her dream came to an end when a bad fall on the ice caused her a career-ending injury. of that event, minjae holds very few memories — only a brief, sharp pain, blood, and black. she woke up in an hospital bed and, no matter how surgeons and professionals her parents reached out to, she soon realised that her career was over. » this unforeseen setback plunged minjae into a dark hole. without friends nor a future, unable to tell who she was without her shattered dreams, she wandered into a world of rebellion and despair. filled with rage, she started exploring the world to try and get back what she'd lost during the years she'd spent focusing only on her sport. she tried dr*ugs, bonded with the wrong people, found herself entangled with the law on multiple occasions... the pain manifested in reckless behavior, fueled by a desperate need to escape a reality she could not accept. » although she remembers this as the darkest moment of her life, it also helped her, in a way, to finally cut the toxic relationship with her parents and to focus more on herself, discovering things she'd never had the chance to discover before. she became more independent, more stubborn, more herself. she moved out of the house, and it was around that time that music finally fell into her life, almost a lifeline from above it came to gave her a new purpose. » through her chaotic life spent between underground parties and pubs, she discovered that dancing was something she enjoyed just as much as skating. when she was finally contacted by a man that saw in her potential to become an idol one day, in his advises she found a path that could give her life a meaning. » a couple of years later, she's 22 and she's trying to chase that dream. she knows she's so far behind many other people that have started to train a lot sooner than her, but the years spent in figure skating make learning dancing and choreographs a bit easier — and, even better, taught her what determination and sacrifice really are. » what she still struggles with the most is building her public persona, her past making it so that it's not that easy anymore to bottle up the fire that she repressed all her childhood life and has only recently started to enjoy. luckily, she knows well enough how to fake and pretend to be someone she's not, all while having fun when no-one's watching. when she's not training and putting up a facade for those who could one day hire her, she can be found working as a dancer (and, sometimes, as a stripper) in nightclubs around seoul, a black wig to cover her blond hair, doing her best to enjoy the freedom she knows she will one day lose with fame.

ᴩʟᴏᴛ/ᴄᴏɴɴᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ɪᴅᴇᴀꜱ

it was rare to see the club that packed, even on a saturday evening. minjae had been working there for almost a month, yet that was probably the first time she could see that many people mingling and dancing around the place. it made her both excited and anxious — more people usually meant more tips, yet it could also mean a higher chance of someone recognizing her. what she was doing wasn’t exactly legal, and it definitely wouldn’t help her reputation if she had to become a trainee one day. dancing half-naked and stripping in front of clients wasn’t a job that should be associated to a wannabe idol, the black wig covering her hair could only do so much to prevent her reputation from being destroyed before she’d even started to build one. still, it wasn’t like she had any other options — the pay was good and, more importantly, it covered her rent, food, and all the dancing and singing classes she needed to try and make it.

plus, there was the fact that she loved performing, despite the risks and the creeps that sometimes came to the club. that night, at least, despite the wide variety of clients the situation seemed to be pretty easy to deal with. according to what her boss had told her, she was supposed to perform in the private room for a group of guys her age, one of which had decided to celebrate his birthday there. nothing fancy, just for fun — minjae could imagine it was going to be a lot more chill than the last time she’d danced for some business men in their 50s and with hands trying to touch more than they should.

frustration was a feeling minjae knew well enough, it’d been her friend during her whole figure skating career and it had followed her like a loyal companion even now that she’d decided to pursue a new aspiration. usually, she was the one experiencing that feeling every time she tried — and tried again — to get better at singing and writing lyrics, not necessarily because she was bad but rather because it was hard to turn raw talent into something usable when she’d never even considered it for the past several years of her life. while music had been a constant in her life, she was a lot better at following its rhythm with her body rather than with her voice and words.

the same, yet opposite struggle she was now seeing in her friend, as min was trying to teach rowoon a choreograph she’d come up with to help him improve his dancing skills. just like all the other times where he had been the one to help her get better at singing, she was trying to return the favor, showing him over and over again how to perform the steps just like he’d once spent a whole week trying to teach her how to reach a higher key with her voice. minjae remembered feeling so frustrated back then she’d almost thrown the microphone against the door — if she hadn’t, it’d been just because rowoon had been patient with her. the same patience she was now trying to offer him, no matter how much time they’d spent in the dancing room she’d rented for the afternoon.

that wasn’t the first time jung minjae found herself in front of a camera — it was, however, the first time she felt the slightly uncomfortable feeling of performing while no actual person was watching. both nowadays and before, minjae was pretty sure she performed a lot better when there were eyes on her. in figure skating, the judges’ admiration and the fear of her mother’s insults afterwards had always pushed her to do her best — now, in the clubs she worked at, the public made her feel powerful enough to put up the most mesmerizing shows. standing in the dancing studio one of her teachers had been kind enough to let her rent for the morning, minjae couldn’t help but stare at herself in the mirror and find herself annoying as hell. the camera was a mechanical eye set on her on the tripod, and she’d even gone as far as putting a few teddy bears in the background as if they were some spectators to her show. in post-production, she was gonna make sure they moved and cheered like guests to her dancing tea party.

the choreography and scenography she’d set up completed the vibe she’d tried to set with the plushies and her hair and makeup as well. from her clothes, to her makeup, to the fancy small table with cups, a teapot, and colorful cupcakes she’d placed in the middle of the room were supposed to make it look like she was a modern, female version ofthe mad hatterdancing in the middle of wonderland.

too bad her perfectionism was taking the best of her. she’d recorded the same performance twenty times already, but it still wasn’t good enough. it was, also, the first time she tried dancing and singing for the whole performance, so that made things a hundred times worse. she was pretty sure there were so many better girl artists out there, but still she wanted to prove to those watching and to herself that she’d made some progress from the last time she’d submitted an application, months ago.

so minjae stopped midway, stopped recording, and took the deepest breath. she got this, next one was going to be the good one.

adjusting the lights once again, checking her makeup in the mirror wall… she finally pressed rec and she started moving. the song wasn’t hers, but it ran through her body like it was part of her soul. the choreo she’d prepared, the moves she’d spent months learning—— despite how many times she’d tried it that day, all of a sudden it all flew smoothly for the first time. even her voice, following the notes, sounded better than it ever did. sure enough, she was never going to be a lead singer, but it was something that definitely added to the quality of her dancing, a plus that made her look less like a moving doll and more like an actual character in the story she was portraying.

the mad hatter danced, lost herself in a world were tea was the only thing turning a grey day into a colorful one, before discovering dance — minjae wondered several times whether it wasn’t a bit too obvious what she was actually portraying, that tea was a very different addiction and that it was all about how dancing and performing had saved her.

and when the music stopped, that smile was on her face. of course was going to cut the next few seconds from the clip she was about to send for the audition, but minjae finally found herself dropping to the ground, a smile on her lips and satisfaction in her core. it wasn’t perfect, but neither was her. that feeling inside her chest, though… she couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so proud of herself, whether she was going to succeed or not.

Minjae hated being late, but she hated even more waking up early on a morning after work. In hindsight, booking a private dance class on a Sunday had probably been a bad idea, but maybe she’d overestimated her energy levels a week ago when she’d called Hyunki and asked for an hour of his time. He’d been nice enough to make time for her on the weekend, so Minjae was trying her best to get there on time despite all the self-sabotaging. She’d turned off the alarm at least three times that morning, and there was no pair of sunglasses thick enough to hide the real weight of her hangover. Maybe she could’ve avoided drinking the night before, but sometimes liquid courage was needed when dancing half-naked in front of way too many weirdos. Shoveling a bagel and some stale coffee down her throat while she ran to the studio had done nothing but almost make her choke as she stopped at a red light — good for her to avoid training on a empty stomach, though.

first of all, thank you to everyone who's already welcomed me and to all those who already started following my blog, I'll make sure to go through the masterlist tomorrow and follow everyone else as well! 💖

I'm about to go to sleep but, before I do, I thought I would post this little PLOT CALL here. you can find all kinds of information regarding minjae in my pinned post, as well as some plot ideas (which will probably be updated soon). of course, any other kind of interactions are super welcome as well, so even if you don't see anything you like there we can still brainstorm something I'm sureee