HAARLEP PLAYLIST
Much like with my Ascended Astarion playlist, I created a playlist for Haarlep only this time I used Google Sheets table and a ranking system to help myself. It, too, tells a story and all the s̲o̲n̲g̲s̲ i̲n̲ i̲t̲ a̲r̲e̲ i̲n̲ c̲h̲r̲o̲n̲o̲l̲o̲g̲i̲c̲a̲l̲ o̲r̲d̲e̲r̲
This story is about Haarlep meeting Tav and how this very ordinary acquaintance turned into something utterly unexpected.
Link to playlist on YouTube at the end of the post.
And now that all the normal people are just listening to the playlist, the nerds can click ‘keep reading’ to dive into the detailed breakdown of the story...
The playlist consists of 5 parts, and for each part I wrote a small drabble to share the vibe with you.
PART 1: HAARLEP
«Shhh… Hush, sweetheart, no need to make such a fuss. I haven’t even sunk my teeth into you yet. But do not fret, I’m not some rabid beast. I won’t lunge at you or tear you apart. I’m just a simple incubus, albeit an outstanding one.
What are incubi? I’m glad you asked.
We are the wielders of the enchanted word. Lords of the human soul. Masters of the all-consuming lust.
We breathe in air and breathe out passion. Love flows through our veins, voluptuousness drips from our fingertips, and our gaze ignites desire.
Your most daring dreams are our law. The innuendo swirling on the tip of your tongue is our feast. Guessing your desires before you even know them is like a drug to us.
Oh, you want to know more? Come closer, sweetheart. I never promised not to bite, but trust me, you are going to love it.»
1. Don’t Stop Me Now
Literally can imagine him waking up to this song.
Yeah, I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars On a collision course I am a satellite, I'm out of control I am a sex machine ready to reload Like an atom bomb about to Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, explode I'm burnin' through the sky, yeah 200 degrees that's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit I'm traveling at the speed of light I wanna make a supersonic woman of you
2. Aimed to Kill
You've been checkin' under your bed to see if I'm there When you look back up I'm under you pullin' your hair Getting lost inside my world, you don't know where I've been Oh no, oh no, I feel it comin' And I tried to save a life with these diamond hands of mine But they're sharper than a knife, I aimed to kill And I tried to fix a heart with these lips that left some scars "I swear I won't do no harm," shh, I aimed to kill
3. Who Made You a Monster?
You've got a twisted way Of making it all seem fine Tricking the world to trust you But everything that you say Is some kind of sordid lie Who taught you how to lie so well? Who made you a monster? Who made you a monster?
4. The Devil is a Gentleman
He don't always come at midnight Burnin' red and talking sin But he knows how to play it just right If you gonna let him in Sleek along and brings you roses He's always got the words to say Just enough so you don't notice That you ain't nothing but his prey
5. Pass The Knife
Thought you had control, I'll strip you till you're bones Scraping your knees till you beg for more Cover you in scars, just to leave a mark Get you addicted, then tear you apart Pass me the knife and I'll eat you alive Take my time, I'll do it how you like it Pass me the knife and I'll eat you alive Love skin deep, you're only here to make me high
6. Terrible Things
All of the things that I've done Terrible things you would never believe Things that I've done, oh, how you'll run If you knew a single word of all of the things that I've done
7. Liquid Smooth
I see this one as a tenderness and longing for a connection, that is hidden deep inside.
I'm beautiful, I know 'cause it's the season But what am I to do with all this beauty? Biology, I am an organism, I'm chemical That's all, that is all I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too And feel my skin is plump and full of life, I'm in my prime I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too I'm at my highest peak, I'm ripe about to fall, capture me
8. Pure Imagination
The fantasy that he creates for the people whom he gets involved with.
Come with me and you'll be In a world of pure imagination Take a look and you'll see Into your imagination We'll begin with a spin Traveling in the world of my creation What we'll see will defy explanation
9. Mr. Sandman
He falls asleep, thinking to himself if there is a way to feel this longing that has been building inside him for quite some time during these lonely evenings in House of Hope, when all he did was waiting, wondering if Raphael would come to him or no. Next thing you know, Tav enters the boudoir...
Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream Make her the cutest that I've ever seen Give her two lips like roses and clover And tell her that her lonely nights are over Sandman, I'm so alone Don't have nobody to call my own Please turn on your magic beam Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream
PART 2: HAARLEP MEETS TAV
Haarlep leaned on the railing of the balcony and gazed thoughtfully into the distance. The grey ash-covered mountains drowned in a reddish haze. The ground beneath them was laced with a web of rifts, their bottomless depths blazing with lava flares. Dirty, colourless clouds drifted In the sky above the crooked-toothed mountain peaks. Avernus in all its ugliness.
His forked tongue lashed out of his mouth and wetted his parched lips. He drew in the air, heavy with dust that settled thickly in his lungs, and spat irritably over the balustrade.
He couldn’t resist tasting her, he just couldn’t. Damned girl.
Haarlep was used to being starved in the House of Hope. The howls of the damned souls and the flesh of devils were not sustaining in the slightest, and over the years, he just had to learn to control his hunger. There was certainly nothing good about it. Haarlep was weaker than he could be, it was harder for him to conjure magic, and sometimes in the mornings his veins painfully twisted into poisonous threads. It was the ache he could only relieve with exhausting, concentration-demanding meditation.
Haarlep's mind slipped into the vivid memories of yesterday.
Yesterday, he dreamed of his past life again… Feasts, masquerades, balls in the mortal world, where he could drink from four or five mortals in a course of a single evening, or even sneak around and drain a soul out of some petty wretch. And that last orgy at the Duke’s mansion? Haarlep closed his eyes and his nose tickled with the scent of the freshest rainbow caviar, which swam in the belly of a fish in the waters of Calimport the day before. His ears rang with the laughter of the young noblewomen, who used to lose their composure after the third glass of sparkling wine, pretending not to notice the lewd glances of the men smoking cigars in the half-dark corners of the room. And Haarlep… He was sitting in the centre of the hall on a golden throne — the Lord of that den of debauchery! — whilst the mortals were crawling on their knees, their faces drooping with lust, their hands reaching out to him as if he were their god… The memories ran through his body in a searing wave, and Haarlep involuntarily craned his neck, arching his back. Things had been different in his past life. The one he had before he fell to his knees in the presence of Mephistopheles.
Yesterday, when he opened his eyes and saw her in the Boudoir, Haarlep thought he was still dreaming. How could he have restrained himself? And was there any point in restraint?
Oh, how delicious she was… Her life essence flowed through his veins, blossoming with a long-forgotten arousal in his chest. Perhaps his starvation was to blame, but she tasted divine. Nothing like any other mortal he had had before. Purposeful, ambitious, a little naive, she opened herself to him like a soft book with a flowery spine and golden embossing, allowing him to drink in her deepest desires, fears, and dreams. And he did drink… At the moment of her climax, in the deep caverns of her soul, he tasted submission, desire to please, an urge to earn praise. Ah, if only he had a little more time! He would have guided her and under his tender yet insistent touch she would have unfurled like a beautiful flower in an overgrown garden. He would have nudged her to fall headfirst into the abyss of her darkest desires.
But he didn’t have enough time. It was all over in a flash. For some puzzling reason, she didn’t grab the Hammer and just slipped away unnoticed.
The faint scent of her arousal still lingered in the Boudoir, making Haarlep violently run his claws over his neck, crossing the impeccable skin with red brown marks. He had been hungry before, but now he was famished. All night after they’d met, he spent tossing and turning in bed, the silk sheets thrown to the floor, his fingers digging into the pillow.
Haarlep closed his eyes, which were stinging as if they were filled with sand, and rubbed the bridge of his nose nervously.
He must see her again.
He would sneak out of the House of Hope, follow the scent of her thoughts, and catch her again.
Consequences be damned.
10. Me and Mr Wolf
Hey little girl, you look so nice In the pretty red dress with those pretty black eyes Hello Mr. Wolf, oh what a surprise To find you here so deep in the night My dear little girl, what's the rush? How about supper, just the two of us? Oh Mr. Wolf, you want me to stay But I fear we'll regret it one day
11. Out Of Control — Haarlep
I watched her feet move, her hips they sway Does a hair flip then starts to say Oh my god, it's my favorite song I pull her close and she sings along We can't slow down even if we tried If the record keeps spinning so will I She likes disco and tastes like a tear Tells me don't stop dancing and she's pulling me near
12. Kill of the Night— Haarlep
The street's a liar I'm gonna lure you into the dark My cold desire To hear the boom, boom, boom of your heart I'm gonna catch ya I'm gonna get ya, get ya, oh, oh-oh I wanna taste the way that you bleed, oh You're my kill of the night
13. Terrible Thing — Tav
Oh for you, you terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Beautiful thing Mm, you beautiful thing A wreck, a wreck you make You leave, you leave me in your wake Oh honey, let me go Aha, aha, don't you let me go
14. Tongues and Teeth — Haarlep
I've grown a mouth so sharp and cruel It's all that I can give to you, my dear And when you come in quick to steal a kiss My teeth will only cut your lips, my dear And I know that you mean so well But I am not a vessel for your good intent I will only break your pretty things I will only wring you dry of everything But if you're fine with that You can be mine like that
15. Horns — Tav
She got blood cold as ice And a heart made of stone But she keeps me alive She's the beast in my bones She gets everything she wants When she gets me alone Like it's nothin' She got two little horns And they get me a little bit
16. if u think i'm pretty
If you think I'm pretty, lay your hands on me Know you can't stop thinkin' 'bout it I know that you're shitty and you're bad for me But I can't stop thinkin' 'bout it Said you needed love, but you're only here for sex, and And I'm dyin' to be next Killed me once before, I just come back more obsessed with you
17. When You Say My Name — Haarlep
And does it scare you That I already know what you're into? You can say lеss, I bet I can guess That you say whatevеr to get me undressed Double dare you, tell me two lies Don't need no truths 'Cause I can see right through you You're no good at pretend I’m using your tricks that you use with your friends I like the way your mouth moves The way you say my name
18. Dirty Thoughts — Tav
I get dirty thoughts about you They get worse when I'm without you Does that mean that I'm going to hell? Or are you thinking them as well? But when you hold me In the fantasy, it's so convincing I shouldn't think the things I'm thinking But now I've gone and let them sink in
19. Eat You — Haarlep
Cause you've been sticky with your tricky words And I would crumble like a humble bird Now you're so tender with an ear I can bend And tell you how I feel I go hungry every night But not this time around I'm gonna eat you, you're my desire I'm gonna sharpen all my teeth and build a fire I'm gonna eat you, cook and defeat you I'm gonna breathe you in my lungs and make you mine
20. Sugar Water — Tav
My boy’s got a sharp twist, no, he’s wicked in the heart Feeds me sugar water just to keep me alive Saw him in my dreams again He’s wiping down the fingerprints Press so hard I float up to the sky It’s kind of tripping me up, babе I’ve got it bad for you Laying back sipping sugar water I’m so weak for thе things you do
21. salvation — Haarlep
Sleep with me Worship me Pray like I’m your god Find the light in my voice Treat us like it’s blasphemy Pray we don’t get caught Let me be your only choice I’ll deny you of salvation I’ll be the reason you repent Kiss me like I’m a conviction Beg for divinity in my breath
22. Pretty In The Dark — Haarlep
I want All the power and the pain I’ll love you in the flames Just tell me that you're mine I’ll be your beautiful obsession Center of attention That’s just what I like Run through your veins Got your heart to keep Calling my name Get down on your knees
23. A Dangerous Thing — Tav
Something about you is soft like an angel And something inside you is violence and danger I knew from the moment we met, you are a dangerous thing When you are with me, I feel like I'm living And living besides you can be unforgiving I knew from the very first step, you are a dangerous thing
PART 3: WHEN THE GAME TURNED SERIOUS
“What do you dream of?”
Haarlep lazily opened his eyes at the soft caressing sound of her voice. Just like always after their little romps, he was in a state of blissful indulgence, like a cat who got the cream. Usually, he would wait out the indolent peak of his satiety and then disappear from her sight again, bestowing her with a dazzling smile and a graceful flick of his wrist as a kiss goodbye. But today, for some reason, he felt overwhelmingly lazy and reluctant to leave.
He glanced down at her little head, which rested perfectly in the dent under his collarbone. The look on her face was pensive, and her delicate features were slightly tinged with a subtle sadness of some sort.
“I dream of having a unicorn,” he muttered.
“Really?” she perked up, but her eyes narrowed upon seeing his snickering grin. She grudgingly elbowed Haarlep in the side, eliciting a little chuckle from him. “I’m asking you seriously.”
“Look at me, mouse. Are these eyes capable of telling untruths?” he batted his eyelashes innocently.
She sighed, but smiled with her lips only and didn’t ask further. The predawn silence enveloped them once more, as the morning light was just beginning to bloom in the sky. The first tinkling glints of sunlight seeped through the open windows, and a biting daybreak rolled down their shoulders with chill.
She shivered and snuggled closer to him. She smelled of sex, girlish sweat, floral honey, and something else he couldn’t quite put his finger on. He inhaled her scent deeply, and the corner of his lips tugged up in a slight smile against his will.
Haarlep was brimming with her life essence, and the barely perceptible magical connection still weaved between them, leaving the flavour of her thoughts on his lips. Her mind was emanating feelings and emotions that, to his incubus sense, were as tangible as her warm shoulder under his palm. He felt she wanted him to ask. But he didn’t ask.
No. He had no desire to ask.
“And what do you dream of, little mouse?” The words slipped from his lips involuntarily, clearly having a mind of their own.
“I want to go back to the Feywild someday. To see the place where I grew up again. To see the old oak grove, and the Falls of the Rejected Bride… To see where my parents are buried.”
Haarlep slid the tip of his tongue over his lips, feeling the bitter tang of her sadness in his mouth, and it made him feel unimaginably wistful.
“What a marvellous dream you have, my dear — to visit a graveyard of memories and bodies.” He snorted and let out a cynical hum. “You should dream of visiting the shores of Lake Esmel in Amn. The sun is warm on the skin, the men, and women have a true lust for life, and the wine there is absolutely fabulous…”
“Oh, that’s not what I meant at all,” she muttered quietly.
He sighed.
“I know, little mouse,” Haarlep murmured, pressing his lips to the top of her head, kissing her ashy hair. He closed his eyes and drew in her sadness with his nose. Damn, even her sadness tasted divine.
“Are you going soon?” she asked timidly. Her voice quivered with an unspoken hope.
Haarlep was silent. He took a deep breath again, deliberately intoxicating himself with her very nature.
“I’ll stay a little longer.”
24. FU In My Head — Tav
Take me closer, take my clothes off Oh I fantasize If I'm honest, it's more fun when you can't read my mind Sometimes I fuck you in my head I let you touch me when I'm lonely in my bed I wanna scream, but hold my breath The kinda thing that you would rather leave unsaid I got dirty wishes on my mind But you will never ever know that I I like to fuck you in my head You make me scream when there's nobody Just the thought of your body
25. Devil On My Shoulder — Tav
Every time I think I'm free, you're calling me Your love pulling me right back down Can't believe that I keep coming back But you make me feel so good I swore I'd never dance with you again Keep safe from the devil on my shoulder But you know me so well And you drag me to Hell I can't keep safe from the devil on my Keep safe from the devil on my shoulder
26. Maniac — Tav
You play girls like a man, but your eyes are like a child Your face is cool and calm, but your hair is wrecked and wild You hide behind your metaphors and pray that no one sees The fare behind your poker face: your dark and twisted needs Your fragile heart and your paper skin Such a beautiful boy filled with so much sin Your reflection is your very worst enemy Behind the glass is an angel, but the devil's beneath Let me in, wear me out Let me in, wear me out
27. You — Haarlep
What I would do to get into your head Crawl out my body into yours instead Swim through your veins all day and every fiber Raid your brain and all your desires If you only knew I would do anything For a taste of you I would do anything Just to see inside And no one else will do All that I want is to be you
28. the fruits — Tav
My love, are you the devil? I would worship you instead of him I have no time for confession For I'm too busy committing sins My love, you're something special I never met someone like you You made me fall from Heaven But I know just what I do But I don't I feel your hands grabbing my throat As you say
29. Rule #34 — Haarlep
I love that you shake When I ravage your skin It's so easy to bite with your hands pinned Shadows dancing on the sheets If you obey I might give you a treat Right now you're mine All mine Give in, you're mine All mine You look so good There on your knees Such a good girl, knows how to please Look at me, look me in the еyes Forget yourself Surrеnder your mind
30. Lovesick in Public — Tav
Last night you really got in my head How’d I get hung up on what you did When all you did was kiss my neck My cheek's red like a cherry Help me cause I am berry Lovesick in public I’m hooked on the way that you taste I know I’m headed for heartbreak
31. Good Looking — Tav
Play casino holes of my eyeballs Roll the dice on my thighs You stopped for breath and I sped up Just to impress you The skyline falls as I try to make sense of it all I thought I'd uncovered your secrets but, turns out, there's more You adored me before Oh, my good looking boy
32. You Put a Spell on Me — Haarlep
Before I hunt you down Grab your chin and kiss your lips You bring me back I lay you down and grab your hips And we lose all control And before you know it I put a spell on you Now you're mine I've got a hold on you, at least for the night
33. Keep It Down — Haarlep
You shoot me up through the clouds I’m a hero in your mouth I'm the sickness you found I'm the fever you're about While I throw you around You're gonna scream ... Shhh: girl keep it down The scars you leave on my back A painting of your attack You're biting down on my fist I know you cannot resist
34. Good Looking — Tav
Pressure on my lips I die for just one kiss Wake, I can't resist Could I be dreaming this? How do I fake it with another man? How do I love him on the weekend? How do I listen to another man? How do I get off on the weekend? You're in my heart, in my heart, in my head
35. So Damn Into You — Haarlep
Can I have you forever? Every single night It started with a bang Don’t know how you got me so messed up But baby I won’t ever get enough, oh 'Cause I’m so damn into you I’m so damn into you
36. From Persephone — Tav
No, I wasn't threatened Mother, I was not bound No, I wasn't carried Off on his three headed hound 'Cause I packed my own bag, found my own way Down into the underground See, mama, he may seem gruesome But he's even got a dog And don't you know that death is A very stable job? 'Cause I love my baby, tall, dark Hades Lord of death is down on his knees for me
37. Hearts a Mess — Tav
Pick apart the pieces of your heart And let me peer inside Let me in where only your thoughts have been Let me occupy your mind as you do mine You have lost too much love To fear, doubt and distrust, it's not enough You just threw away the key to your heart Don't get burned 'cause nothing gets through It makes it easier, easier on you That much more difficult for me To make you see
38. Closer — Haarlep
I wanna fuck you like an animal I wanna feel you from the inside I wanna fuck you like an animal My whole existence is flawed You get me closer to God You can have my isolation You can have the hate that it brings You can have my absence of faith You can have my everything
39. Choke — Tav
You are a shadow Following me where I go I'd be better without you What are you doing to me? I'm suffocating Don't know how to explain it But I feel like I'm fading What are you doing to me? Loosen your grip before I choke Can't catch my breath, I'm gonna choke I wish that you'd just let me go I don't want this, I promise, just leave me alone Loosen your grip beforе I-
40. she calls me daddy — Haarlep
It might be a little superficial She plays with the boys But she comes home to me Little fucked up but I think it's official ’Cause she might be your girl But she's calling me daddy She's mi-i-i-ine She wears a collar with my name Secretive but not ashamed She's mi-i-i-ine But I'd never tie her down They always come around now
41. The Masochism Tango — Tav
I ache for the touch of your lips, dear But much more for the touch of your whips, dear You can raise welts like nobody else As we dance to the Masochism Tango Let our love be a flame, not an ember Say it's me that you want to dismember Blacken my eye, set fire to my tie As we dance to the Masochism Tango
42. Wicked Game
The world was on fire, and no one could save me but you It's strange what desire will make foolish people do I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you What a wicked game to play To make me feel this way What a wicked thing to do To let me dream of you
PART 4: OBSESSION
“Say it! I want to hear you say it!” It was not a spoken word, but a rasping growl that erupted from his chest. He loomed over her, with his back rounded, and bristled, like a wild beast over its prey.
His fingers clenched harder on her throat.
She dug her small fingernails into his straining arm. Wet strands of her fringe clung to her forehead, covered in beads of sweat. Her eyebrows were raised piteously, her emerald eyes fixed on his face. She parted her plump cherry lips wide as she gulped in the rhythmic breaths of air.
“I am yours,” she replied hoarsely. “I am yours, Haarlep. Yours… Haarlep! Haarlep. Haarley…”
He growled again and thrust his hips into hers with abandon. She cried out, running her trembling fingers through his wavy black hair, pulling it gently. Her emotions exploded like fireworks in his mind, blurring in coloured circles under his closed eyelids. He pushed his hips against hers like a man possessed, drowning in her sweet surrender. She was under him, and she was everywhere, enveloping him like a raging torrent. Her fragility tingled along his spine, her sincerity squeezed his heart like a vice, her vulnerability stroked him with hundreds of gentle fingers, her trust filled his very being with a velvety warmth.
He couldn’t drink enough of her, couldn’t inhale her with his full lungs. He could barely restrain himself from devouring her whole without a shred left.
As always with her, the pulsing life essence flowed easily, like a chiming stream, she gave it to him willingly. Despite the intoxicating madness threatening to overwhelm him, he tried to take as little as possible so as not to hurt his little mouse in any way.
“You’re driving me mad,” he growled into her ear in a frenzy, his fingers on her neck tightening into a bruising grip.
“I want you to go mad! Lose your mind! Go insane! For me…”
His hips picked up a punishing rhythm
She shrieked and dug her nails into his shoulders, forcing him to arch his back. Clenched like a spring, she stiffened and quivered beneath him, out of breath. Her consciousness blazed like a bonfire on Midsummer Night, spilling her life essence. It crushed him like a storm wave, drowning him in rapture. With the last thrust, Haarlep froze and shuddered, feeling the physical bliss merge with the cascade of her emotions flashing in his mind.
He collapsed on top of her, pressing himself against her hot chest, nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck. She wrapped her legs around his hips, unwilling to let him go, pulling him greedily against her body. Her hoarse and frequent breathing burned his temple.
“Yours… Yours… And you are mine. My Haarley…” she whispered, choking on euphoria, trembling with delight.
With a growl that shook his chest, he slipped his arms under her back, pulling her close, so tight that it was probably hard for her to breathe.
“What have you done to me, mouse?” he exhaled, his whisper tinted with a hint of desperation and confusion.
“I bewitched you. Enchanted you, spellbound you, charmed you, beguiled you. Now you’re not going anywhere.”
For a few moments, only their laboured breaths echoed in the silence of their secret sanctuary.
"I am not,” he agreed and captured her sweet lips in a tender kiss.
43. I Wanna Be Yours — Haarlep
Let me be your 'leccy meter An' I'll never run out Let me be the portable heater That you'll get cold without I wanna be your setting lotion (Wanna be) Hold your hair in deep devotion (How deep?) At least as deep as the Pacific Ocean I wanna be yours
44. The Cult Of Dionysus
I'm feeling devious You're looking glamorous Let's get mischievous And polyamorous Wine and women and wonderful vices Welcome to the cult of Dionysus Run, run, run away Just take my hand and we'll abandon this world We'll wash those tears away You're young and beautiful, and I'll love you always We got no time for pain When it's just you and me in ecstasy
45. Angel of Small Death & the Codeine Scene — Haarlep
I watch the work of my kin, bold and boyful Toying somewhere between love and abuse Calling to join them the wretched and joyful Shaking the wings of their terrible youths Freshly disowned in some frozen devotion No more alone or myself could I be Lurched like a stray to the arms that were open No shortage of sordid, no protest from me
46. Obsessed With You — Haarlep
Your smile sets my heart aflame Electrocute me with your eyes The very mention of your name My stomach fills with butterflies Your love is better than cocaine I need you more than oxygen I've got it bad again An O-B-S-E-S-S-I-O-N But I want to get next to you Yeah, I love all the things you do I want to get close to you You are my dream come true I want to have sex with you Your sweet caress won't do Cause I'm obsessed with you
47. Misery Meat — Tav
You want a taste of my brain? Okay, it's yours anyway A bite of my eye? Alright I won't put up a fight As you open up my ribs the blood flows out like a river You strip my bones away as you indulge in my liver And the more that I am in pain The more that you'll gain And to me, that seems like a pretty fair trade
48. High Enough — Haarlep
Do you see anyone other than me? Baby, please I'll take a hit of whatever you got, maybe two, maybe three Oh, you're phenomenal, feel like a domino, fall to my knees I am a malady, you are my galaxy, my sweet relief I used to like liquor to get me inspired But you look so beautiful, my new supplier I used to like smoking to stop all the thinking But I found a different buzz
49. Dear Alice (Rainy Days) — Haarlep
I'm losing my faith in you, my long-lost friend, Alice Roses have lost their colors And it's breaking my heart (Ah) You take my breath away And I don't know what to do And I don't know what to do Before you say your last word That makes me want To lay you down I'll kiss, I'll touch, I'll cut you into the pieces And you feel the same And you'll know my crave And you'll see that I'm The only one for you
50. I Am Your Skin — Haarlep
I wanna be your skin I wanna feel everything you feel I will be your covering And I will hide you inside of me With every breath in harmony I wanna be your skin I wanna be your covering
51. Desire — Haarlep
Baby, I wanna touch you I wanna breathe into your will See, I gotta hunt you I gotta bring you to my hell Baby, I wanna fuck you I wanna feel you in my bones Boy, I'm gonna love you I'm gonna tear into your soul
52. Obsessed — Tav
I wanna feel you in my arms Hold you hostage in my heart It’s true 'Cause I'm so obsessed with you Your every word, I pick apart Down to the punctuation marks All you do 'Cause I'm so obsessed with you Oh, with you
53. Spiracle — Haarlep
I want the parts of you You only show to the birds outside your bedroom window I want the teeth that you lost as a child That you hide in a box under your pillow I want your secrets, your clementine fields The ropes that you climb up, the parts that won't heal I want your safe word, your passive resistance The sickness you foster, your favorite addictions And I want your nightmares, the ghost in your doorway Your paralyzed sleeping, your- (Aaaah) I want you butterfly, I want you sailor I am your lover and I am your jailor
PART 5: VANILLA CREAM FLAVOUR
“All right. Take it off.”
Smirking, Haarlep pulled the silk blindfold off, and smiled at her ruddy face and eyes sparkling with mirth. He raised his gaze and looked ahead.
From the high hill where they sat, they could see Baldur’s Gate harbour buzz lazily beneath them. It was slowly preparing to shake off the last cargoes, sigh with its sleepy waves, and retire to rest for the day. The half sunk into the bay of the Chionthar River, casting a golden shimmering glow over its rippling surface. Haarlep lowered his eyes. Before him, on the blanket spread on the ground, she laid out small plates packed with all sorts of savoury delicacies. One was filled with green grapes and strawberries, the other with neatly arranged cheese and sausages, appetisingly glistening with fat. Nearby stood bowls of buns and sweet rolls of various kinds.
“Somehow this picnic looks suspiciously like a date,” he placed a finger on his chin with feigned thoughtfulness.
She shook her head.
“A date? What a silly thing to say. We’re going to unromantically stuff our faces with this unappetising food, that’s all there is to it,” she tossed a grape into the air. He caught it, and it burst in his mouth, spraying sweet juice on his tongue.
Haarlep sank to the grass and rested his head in her lap. She immediately ran her nimble fingers through his hair, stroking it absent-mindedly, as she was gazing out into the distance, at the orange sun setting in Chionthar.
They were silent. Haarlep had long ago realised that it was nice to be silent with her.
Wide over the water resounded the shouts of the workers, who wrapped up the unloading of the last fishing schooner. A loud crack of a wooden crate breaking reached their ears, accompanied by the selected swearing of the cargo handlers.
“You know, I’ve come to realise one rather curious thing,” Haarlep mused thoughtfully. “I know very little about mortals.”
“How so?” she snapped out of her reverie and, for a moment, stopped flicking through his hair and looked down at him. “You can reach into the most secret nooks and crannies of a person’s mind, find out things about them that even they themselves are unaware of.”
“Yes. Except I was looking for a very different thing.”
She continued to stroke him, running the silky strands of his hair through her fingers, as she studied him with an expectant gaze. Haarlep noticed how sweetly she always nibbled on her lower lip when she was curious, and smiled at his observation.
“I’ve always looked for the weaknesses, to see what buttons I can push to get what I need from a mortal, and I’ve always succeeded. I searched into their past. Their traumas, their fears, their most depraved sexual experiences and lusts. All other sides of humanity were always foreign to me. I considered them useless. But after glimpsing into your head, I changed my mind.”
She raised her arched eyebrows, and Haarlep’s mind responded to her emotion. Her sudden sky-blue surprise flashed before his inner gaze, her wonder glided tenderly over his arms like a soft caress. And amidst it all, there was something else — a subtle, salty undertone, tinged with pure, unadulterated hope.
Lately, she had been emitting life essence a little at a time almost constantly, and Haarlep didn’t even need to do anything to elicit it. He had never encountered something like this before. He had to resist the temptation to indulge his innate greed and delve into her. The trust she exhibited never ceased to amaze him.
“I became curious and looked a little deeper. I’ve seen your strength, tasted your fascination with the world, touched your thoughts about the future. And that’s just a small portion of you. There’s so much more...”
He grinned and shook his head slightly.
“I can’t believe it never occurred to me to do this before.” He fell silent halfway through the sentence, and sank deeper into his thoughts, but after a moment he smiled at her again and added, “I guess I just didn’t care. But with you, little mouse, everything is different. Perhaps you did bewitch me?”
“Of course I did. I have a witch’s eye.”
She leaned closer, rolling her eyes and made a funny face, eliciting a laugh from him. Oh, what a dummy.
Delighted that she had managed to humour him, she straightened up again.
“How does it feel to drink the life essence of a human?”
“Oh, it’s the most marvellous feeling.”
Haarlep sighed, and his gaze drifted towards the sky. The cirrus clouds scattered like weightless pinkish-orange silk threads across the deep blue canvas. Their weightlessness and ephemeral nature made him think they were about to dissolve right before his eyes, but they froze in the sky like translucent butterflies caught on a pin.
“Life essence differs from mortal to mortal,” he continued. “It contains their unique nature. In the moments of supreme physical delight, the mortal becomes vulnerable enough for an incubus to harvest it with ease. It’s like crushing a ripe peach in your hand and catching its sweet juice with your lips. The essence is coloured by human emotions and feelings, and each one we can taste, like a hint of flavour in a wine.”
She hummed thoughtfully and twisted a small strand of his hair around her index finger.
“It does sound marvellous.”
Haarlep shifted his gaze to her.
“Every emotion is not only a taste but also a colour, a smell, and sometimes even a sense of a touch. For instance, when I pin your wrists to the bed above your head, you quiver so sweetly… I feel a prickly shiver run down my spine, and you smell like the first snowdrop on an early Alturiak morning: meltwater, almonds, and a promise of warmth.”
She blushed, and an embarrassed smile flickered across her lips. Haarlep smiled back at her.
“It’s like I feel the world with your skin and through you. Your senses mingle with mine, your consciousness flows into mine, the reality bursts with new colours and expands like a star exploding.” He reached out and cupped her cheek, stroking it gently with his thumb. “I love looking at this world with you. I see things I never knew existed before.”
She closed her eyes for a moment, surrendering to his caressing touch.
There it was. Again. He felt it again.
“You know, there’s something quite mysterious about your life essence. No matter how many times I taste it, I can’t figure it out…” he frowned, and his hand fell limply to the grass along his body. “Every feeling and thought you have, they all have the same tinge, the same unknown flavour to me. Something very soft and sweet and enveloping, like… like…”
Haarlep fell silent, trying to find the words to describe this incredible sensation that made him want to squeeze his eyes shut. One that spreads with homely warmth through his body, rolls with tenderness across his tongue, drips from his fingertips akin to molasses.
“Like vanilla cream?” she suggested.
He fired a glare at her.
“Yes! Sounds about right…”
She blushed even more and turned her face to the setting sun again.
Of course, she knew what that vanilla-cream flavour of her feelings was.
And deep down, so did he.
54. Life Worth Living — Tav
Take what you need, darling I'm just here for you Ooh ooh ooh ooh (oh) Give me your love and Physical affection Ooh ooh ooh ooh Give me the worst of you to hold You to take me to the heavens Give me the best of all your grace You make life worth living
55. Love Like You — End Credits — Haarlep
If I could begin to be Half of what you think of me I could do about anything I could even learn how to love When I see the way you act Wondering when I'm coming back I could do about anything I could even learn how to love like you
56. Hardest of Hearts — Tav
There is love in your body but you can't hold it in It pours from your eyes and spills from your skin Tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts There is love in your body but you can't get it out It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth Sticks to your tongue and it shows on your face That the sweetest of words have the bitterest taste Darling heart, I loved you from the start But you'll never know what a fool I've been
57. I Might As Well Die With You — Haarlep
Oh baby When I see your face Too beautiful for this place Don't let the vice and the bad deals Let it go to waste Over and over and over again Oh baby Spiraling out of control God save me Falling in love at the end of world Just take me now What’s the use? I Might as well die with you
58. Souls on Fire — Tav
Do you feel the burn between our hearts Souls on fire A strange desire Have you given in To this ancient ritual I don’t know how long we’ve been apart But we’re the same old souls playing different parts Same old souls playing different parts Picking up the broken pieces of our hearts
59. She — Haarlep
This is the song that started this playlist and it happened so that it ends it. A huge heartfelt thank you to @mina-astarvara for sharing it with me in the first place.
She may be the face I can’t forget A trace of pleasure or regret May be my treasure or the prize I have to pay She may be the reason I survive The why and wherefore I’m alive The one I’ll care for through the rough And ready years Me, I’ll take her laughter and her tears I’ll make them all my souvenirs Oh, where she goes I’ve got to be The meaning of my life is she
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