ammi

He hasn’t brought up the fact that Aerion came over yet. He hasn’t really said anything when he walked in (unannounced – because of course he has a spare key), picked up Syrax, plopped her on his lap and turned on the tv to play his favourite film, Interstellar.

You have opted for a tshirt emblazoned with a massive fish and the word ‘fih’ printed out – a present from Tansy for Christmas which she found hilarious. Dunk’s isn’t too much better (it’s just a photo of a plate of fettuccine pasta, paired with the phrase ‘milf - man I love fettucine’). Paired with some pj pants, you and Dunk looked the epitome of cosy dorks as you consume your weight in instant noodles.

It’s been a little while since you have seen him, and you hadn’t realised how much you really needed this. He’s the brother you always wanted, and to have him back in your apartment is a soothing breath of fresh air. 

You know that Dunk can sometimes be in need of companionship but without explaining yourself – which is how you’ve come to right now.

Dunk always cries during Interstellar.

“Aerion came over last week.” The movie had finished, so now the both of you are just scrolling aimlessly through Youtube.

Dunk’s eyes are puffy and red as he looks over at you. There’s an urge settling deep in your stomach that says something else is up, that it wasn’t just TARS and Coop and Brand and their story that made him so upset.

But he will bring it up when he wants to.

“That so?” He croaks, looking back to click on a compilation of funny moments from the Simpsons.

You nod, reaching over to snatch the remote from him and effectively muting the tv. 

“Hey, I was watching that!” Dunk attempts to grab the remote from you. 

He fails.

“Aerion said you told him where to find me.” You point the remote at Dunk like a weapon.

The bruise on your cheek had settled to a yellowish-green, with a spot of light brown around the scab – which has now lessened to a tiny smudge blurring your features.

It is barely noticeable even without makeup, now. 

You’re glad it healed so fast.

Dunk purses his lips together. “Ah.”

You raise a brow. “Ah? Dude. Asking permission would have been nice.”

The large man shifts his head to the side. 

“Yeah, well. You wouldn’t talk to me or Tanselle about it.”

“Because I didn’t wanna have to relive it!” You shriek. Usually you don’t lose it, but it’s Dunk. He’s seen you through thick and thin, seen your worst moments and your best, seen you crying on the floor after a boy broke your heart in ninth grade, seen you naked and seen you in your shittiest clothes.

“It terrified me. It still does. I don’t like walking home alone anymore. I look over my shoulder every time I’m in town.” You sob, pressing the heels of your hands to your eyes. The emotion overcame you instantly, and now you’re crying, stupidly.

But it’s just Dunk.

He knows you don’t need physical contact right now – he knows you just need to vent. So he sits, and you talk. He listens.

“Dunk, I’m so fucking scared. It was a freak accident, sure, just a random guy. And you scared him off, and I’m so grateful to you for that, because I have no fucking clue how to deal with it. But you told Aerion, and now he thinks I can’t do anything, he thinks I can’t even walk home without being scared!.”

“But you can’t.” Dunk says your name softly, and you sniffle, blinking through tears as you hiccup and look at the man cuddling Syrax.

“You just said you can’t.”

Your mouth opens and closes like a fish. Like your tshirt.

Oh, he’s right. He’s so right.

You needed someone like Aerion to show you that, and Dunk knew it.

Dunk smiles at you. All-knowing, kind and caring, the boy who has known you since birth, Dunk.

He did exactly what you needed.

You sit on the couch and press play on The Simpsons compilation.

₊✩‧౨ৎ₊˚ 

INSTAGRAM CHAT - PRIVATE MESSAGES

@ syraxbaby Hey.

@ aerionbrightfl4me oh so now you wanna talk

@ syraxbaby I think we should talk about what happened.  Seen

You worry your lip between your teeth. It’s bad enough he’s not in the mood to talk, but leaving you on seen sends your brain into overdrive – you’ve never liked it, and so now you just can’t not think about how much he probably hates you, and is telling Daeron and Valarr that he hates you and that they should hate you too, and all of that shit that you- oh.

He responds.

@ aerionbrightfl4me i thought i ‘make shit worse’

@ syraxbaby Oh God. I am so, so so sorry. I really overreacted. Please. I’d like to apologise.

@ aerionbrightfl4me omg shes in love w me dw love meet at snow cafe?

@ syraxbaby Thank you, Aerion.

You click your phone off and look over at Dunk sprawled on the couch – eyes shut, snoring softly, with his mouth half-open and a ball of orange fuzz curled in his arms, snoring equally as cute. 

A small smile tilts your lips as you check the time – it’s only late afternoon, so you grab your bag and keys, scrawling a quick ‘out to meet aerion don' t worry’ note on a post-it and sticking it on Dunk’s forehead.

Syrax mrrps softly, opening a single sleepy eye to watch you. You give her a quick scratch under her chin and plant a kiss on Dunk’s cheek, before heading out the door.

 ₊✩‧౨ৎ₊˚ 

It’s as you step onto the bus that your phone buzzes in your pocket – and shortly after, the chime of the ringtone cutting through your previously distracted haze of listening to some stranger’s intense conversation with her friend about a guy she knows or something.

Fishing in your bag for the device, you pull it out to see the screen flashing Daeron’s name.

What.

You hesitate, looking around, meeting eyes with some old lady who sends you a glare and pointedly looks at your – still ringing – phone clutched in your hand.

You mouth an apology and swipe the call to answer, holding the phone to your ear.

Was it a coincidence that on the way to meet his brother, he calls you?

“Hello?”

A giggle echoes on the other side of the phone, overlapping with another, older voice.

“Oh my goodness she answered!” Very, very young. Definitely not Daeron.

Confusion crumples your face, and you frown. 

“Daeron?”

“Daeron has a girlfriend!” The older, female voice calls out on the other side of the phone.

Realisation sinks into you and a fond smile spreads across your lips.

“Egg? Is that you and Rhae?”

Giggles, again. Well. You have your answer.

“Is Daeron there?” You ask, trying not to laugh at their excited chirps and questions and kissy-face noises.

“Ooo, wanna talk to your boyfriend, ooo-” Egg sings, and it’s distinctly Egg because you can tell the slightly playful, extremely high pitched sound from Rhae’s smoother, grounded voice.

And then a deep voice cuts through their giggles, and you hear a faint shout.

“OI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY PHONE!”

You clap a hand over your mouth so as to not bust out laughing in the middle of the bus.

“Give me that- hey, come back here- who the hell…? Oh. Oh, hi.” Daeron’s voice is smooth and dark and there’s something behind it that you can’t recognise.

“Hi, Daeron.” You smile, and the same old lady shoots you another glare. You scrunch your face slightly at her, turning your back to face the other side of the bus.

“Hey. Hi. Sorry. Um, how are you?” Daeron’s voice pitches high at the end which only makes you stifle another giggle. 

“Good! I’m good. I’m okay.” 

“Good! That’s really good!” Daeron sounds just as awkward as you feel, though you're not too sure why. This entire conversation is a bit ridiculous.

“So, I’m assuming Egg and Rhae took your phone before you could realise?”

Daeron looses a breath. The crackly static of the line echoes for a second.

“Yeah… yeah. Um, what are you doing?”

He’s scrambling for small talk, you could only assume. It’s sweet. Nice.

“Um, I’m currently on the bus to a cafe.” You leave out the fact Aerion is the one you will be meeting, if only to avoid any kind of awkwardness.

“Nice! You meeting someone, or…” Daeron trails off.

You chew on the inside your cheek, before responding.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m meeting Aerion.”

“Oh.”

“I wanted to apologise to him, I guess. I haven’t really been a good friend recently.”

Daeron’s silent on the other side of the line, which just exacerbates your nervousness. The bus bell chimes as you near closer to your stop.

“I really do value our friendship.” His voice startles you out of the current spiral you are drawing yourself down, making you start quickly.

You smile, without realising.

“Yeah, me too.”

After a beat, you open your mouth to speak, only to get cut off.

“I haven’t had as many nightmares since the other night.” 

A rush of warmth floods your body and a bright smile spreads your lips. 

“That’s so good to hear, Daeron!”

A small chuckle, and then. “Yeah, it is. I think you have something to do with it… so, thank you.”

At this point, your gaze catches on the small screen at the front of the bus, and the flashing words of LANDING CORNER scrolling across the screen.

“This is my stop, so I’ll catch you later, Daeron?” You say, as the bus driver glares at you and waves you to get off. You hold up your hand in acknowledgement, tapping your bus pass quickly and nearly tripping over the bus step.

“Oh, yeah, of course. Um, have fun.” Daeron’s voice sobers at the sound of you leaving – or maybe it;s just your imagination.

“Thanks-”

He hangs up.

As you step off the bus and look up at Snow Cafe, your heart thuds in your chest. The frostbitten windows and wooden skirting on the outside, with a traditional hanging sign over your head, seem all too unfamiliar.  This isn’t your typical side of the city – there’s people dressed in fancy clothes and stern expressions walking past; even those walking their dogs look strict.

You’re building up the courage to walk inside when a soft voice cuts through the cold, calling your name.

You turn.

Valarr is dressed in a long winter coat, a collared shirt, and matching dark slacks, and he’s walking right toward you with an almost panicked expression painted across his face – eyebrows knitted together, lips firm, mismatched eyes staring through you. 

He’s walking with determination, eyes set above your shoulder, past you, as he stops in front of you and grips your upper arms.

You blink with surprise.

“Hey, Valarr- what-?”

Piercing purple and brown eyes see right into your soul as he holds onto you, personal space completely abolished. There’s simmering panic and frustration and fear leaking into his gaze, which makes you pause, stifling the flare of abrupt anger and embarrassment overcoming you.

Concern blooms in your stomach. You lean in slightly, placing a hand gently on his arm, pushing it off your body. “Valarr, are you okay?”

He looks up behind you quickly, another bright surge of dread swallowing his typically stoic face, before looking down at you. He gulps.

“You have to promise not to be mad at what I’m about to do.”

Confusion clouds your mind (what he’s about to do? what?), and you turn your head to catch a glimpse of curly pink hair and almond skin when Valarr’s fingers jut your chin back to face him.

The pink-haired girl calls Valarr’s name, and he shoots you an apologetic frown.

And then his freckles are too close and his scent is crowding you, smoky and deep, and realisation curdles in your stomach and out of the corner of your eye you can see a flash of platinum blond and tattoos, but you can’t think because Valarr’s lips are on yours, smooth and wet and undeniably firm.

Your brain short circuits.

He pulls away, apologetic, before tossing an arm around your shoulders and spinning you to face the girl.

“Kiera, hey, crazy seeing you here,” Valarr nudges you, and you blink once and then twice. “Sweetheart, introduce yourself.” 

You stay silent as Valarr introduces you to Kiera, because of course this is Kiera, but there are more pressing matters you have to deal with at this moment.

Because all you can see is Aerion a few paces away, two coffee cups in hand, staring at you and at Valarr with his arm so casually and confidently slung around where his own typically resides, and he looks absolutely, unbelievably, irrevocably shattered.

okay. i know. i abandoned you all. if im being honest, i literally lost all motivation for like ages, and then everything kind of went to shit at home and in uni and just in general, but we perservere and we rekindle our love for writing!! i watched project hail mary and that genuinely refreshed my soul (hence why you might have seen that ryland grace fic a little while ago). the outline for this fic is completed and i only have like five chapters left which is HEARTBREAKING!! thank you all for sticking with me and this fic, i genuinely have loved this experience and i PROMISE more updates are coming regularly now exams season is upon us. thank you all again, i really hope this update does the waiting time justice.

DO NOT COPY OR REPOST MY WORK ONTO OTHER PLATFORMS. BELONGS TO @milkandmoss.