allie 💫

✮ "I keep almost telling you. Every single day."

✮ "I watch you laugh with other people and wonder if you'd laugh like that with me."

✮ "I wrote you a hundred messages I never sent."

✮ I memorized the way you say my name without meaning to."

✮ "I keep finding excuses to be in the same room as you."

✮ "I don't know how to be near you and pretend I feel nothing."

✮ "You touched my hand for two seconds and I thought about it for two weeks."

✮ "I keep practicing what I'd say to you. It never sounds right."

✮ "I saw something today and my first thought was you. It's always you."

✮ "I'm terrified you'll never know and equally terrified that you will."

✮ "Every time you leave I count down until I see you again."

✮ "I think I've been in love with you for so long I forgot what before felt like."

✮ "You smiled at me today and I completely lost my train of thought."

✮ "I just want one moment where I don't have to pretend I don't care about you."

☆ "Hold my hand and look like you mean it. My entire family is watching."

☆ "We need to get our story straight before we walk in there."

☆ "You're a terrible fake partner. You're too convincing when you're being sweet."

☆ "I didn't expect you to remember my coffee order. That wasn't part of the deal."

☆ "Stop looking at me like that in public. People will think you actually like me."

☆ "This was supposed to be simple. Why does nothing with you stay simple."

☆ "You held my hand first tonight. I didn't ask you to. I noticed."

☆ "My mother loves you. This has gotten wildly out of hand."

☆ "The lines are blurring and I need you to help me find them again."

☆ "I've said I love you fourteen times this weekend and meant it more each time. Problem."

☆ "You remembered the thing I said three weeks ago. Fake partners don't do that."

☆ "When does the act end and the real thing start. Asking for logistical reasons."

☆ "I convinced everyone we were in love. I forgot to convince myself it wasn't real."

☆ "Stop being so good at this. It's making everything very complicated for me."

☆ "I've been looking for you in every room I've ever walked into."

☆ "The universe decided this. I just showed up."

☆ "You feel like something I've always known and just found."

☆ "I don't believe in fate. Then explain you. Explain all of this."

☆ "We keep finding each other across every version of every life. I stopped being surprised."

☆ "You're my person. I knew it before I knew your name."

☆ "The bond doesn't care about timing or circumstance. Apparently."

☆ "I fought it. I want you to know I really genuinely fought it."

☆ "Every story ends with you. I've checked."

☆ "I was whole before you. Now I don't know what that felt like."

☆ "You make me feel like I was always supposed to arrive here."

☆ "Soulmates aren't always soft. Sometimes they're the thing that breaks you open."

☆ "I found you in the worst possible moment. The universe has no sense of timing."

☆ "I would find you in every life. That's not romantic. That's just fact."

⟢ "I have two moods--Hungry and aggressively hungry."

⟢ "I wasn't eavesdropping. I was just standing nearby with excellent hearing."

⟢ "You invited me to a 7am meeting. Our friendship is under review."

⟢ "I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me personally."

⟢ "I said yes before you finished the sentence because food was mentioned."

⟢ "My love language is sending you memes at 2am without context."

⟢ "I'm an acquired taste. If you don't like me, acquire better taste."

⟢ "I cleaned the whole house. Guests are coming. I will not be taking questions about my normal state."

⟢ "You said it would take five minutes. It has been forty five. I aged."

⟢ "I don't have a problem. I have a lifestyle that concerns other people."

⟢ "I wasn't sleeping in the meeting. I was processing with my eyes closed."

⟢ "Sorry I'm late. I didn't want to come and it took longer than expected."

⟢ "I'm a delight. Exhausting, but a delight."

"⟢ You made a budget. Adorable. How long did that last."

⟢ "I know you don't feel it. I've known for a long time. I just haven't figured out how to stop yet."

⟢ "You talk about her and your whole face changes and I have to just sit there and watch that happen."

⟢ "I keep showing up because some part of me thinks if I'm just there enough, present enough, good enough — and I know. I know how that sounds."

⟢ "I'm not waiting for you. I'm just not moving on yet. There's a difference I keep telling myself."

⟢ "You hug me the same way you hug everyone and I have to remind myself of that every single time."

⟢ "I know every little thing about you and you don't even know my favorite color and I let that happen. I did that to myself."

⟢ "I don't want to ruin what we have. What you have. What I have is something else entirely."

⟢ "You called me your best friend and I smiled and said yeah and went home and sat in my car for forty minutes."

⟢ "I think what kills me most is that you're not even doing anything wrong."

⟢ "I've talked myself out of telling you so many times I've lost count. Tonight almost wasn't one of them."

⟢ "You looked at me once — really looked — and I built an entire future out of three seconds. I know. I know."

⟢ "I'm happy for you. Genuinely, actually, from the bottom of this stupid inconvenient heart, happy for you."

⟢ "I keep thinking I'll get over it. Six months ago I thought I was over it. Here we are."

⟢ "You deserve someone who loves you like this. I just wish it could've been me."

⟢ "I'm going to tell you and it's going to change everything and I've decided I'd rather have the truth than keep protecting a version of us that only exists for me."

⟢ "Don't be kind about it. I can't handle you being kind about it."

⟢ "I think I fell in love with the way you made me feel about myself. That's a complicated thing to grieve."

⟢ "You're not mine and you were never going to be mine and I think some part of me knew that from the beginning."

⟢ "I loved you quietly for so long it started to feel like a personality trait."

⟢ "I'm stepping back. Not because I want to. Because I have to start wanting things that are actually possible."

⟢ "The worst part isn't loving you. The worst part is how easy it is. How completely natural and effortless and pointless."

⟢ "I hope one day someone loves you the way I did. I hope you notice it that time."

⟢ "I'm letting it go now. I'm putting it down. I'm going to keep telling myself that until it's true."

⟢ "You'll never know. I think that's the kindest thing I've ever done for either of us."

⟢ "I'm not angry. I'm past angry. Angry was six months ago. What I am now doesn't have a name yet."

⟢ "You want to know what it felt like? It felt like drowning in something you poured."

⟢ "Don't you dare cry. You don't get to cry. That's mine. You don't get that too."

⟢ "I have thought about this moment for so long and now that you're here I just feel tired. So tired. Like the anger finally ate itself."

⟢ "You broke something fundamental in me. Just—something that worked before doesn't work anymore."

⟢ "I used to pray you'd come back. Then I started praying you wouldn't. Funny how that works."

⟢ "You want forgiveness? Stand there. Keep standing there. Maybe in ten years I'll have something for you."

⟢ "I'm not the mess you left behind anymore. But god I was. God you should've seen what you left behind."

⟢ "There are nights I wake up and I'm so angry I can taste it. It tastes like metal. Like something that should've healed."

⟢ "You told me I was too sensitive. I believed you for years. That's the part I can't forgive. That I believed you."

⟢ "You never hit me. You want a medal for that? You never hit me and somehow I still flinch."

⟢ "I'm not a tragedy. I refuse to be your tragedy. What you did was ugly and ordinary and I will not make it beautiful for you."

⟢ "I was a child. You knew I was a child and you did it anyway and I have spent my entire adult life cleaning up what you made."

⟢ "Stop explaining. Every word out of your mouth is just you loving yourself more than you ever loved me."

⟢ "I don't want to hurt you. I want to unhappen you. There's a difference."

⟢ "You know what's funny? I still defend you sometimes. Habit, I guess. Old dog stuff. I hate myself for it every time."

⟢ "I survived you. I want you to sit with that. I survived you and you don't even know what that cost."

⟢ "The version of me that loved you is dead. I watched her die. It was slow and it was ugly and she deserved better."