prettiest cryer ⋆‧°𓏲ּ𝄢
comm by me
art by @anmenmai
d e v o n

Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
trying on a metaphor
NASA
official daine visual archive
untitled
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Mike Driver

Janaina Medeiros
Claire Keane
cherry valley forever

ellievsbear

JVL
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
RMH
ojovivo
Show & Tell

blake kathryn
Noah Kahan

seen from Türkiye

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@midnight-in-town
prettiest cryer ⋆‧°𓏲ּ𝄢
comm by me
art by @anmenmai

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more evidence that Modri and Polaris are not the same person
I just got my copy of vol 35 today, and in the preview for vol 36, it describes Modri as a 聖職者 (clergyman).
The definition of this word in English seems looser so I'll put the Japanese one - "someone whose profession is to lead in a religious capacity". So there is our confirmation that he is an official religious leader as opposed to just an obsessed weirdo, lol.
On Wikipedia, for both 聖職者 and clergy, it lists "deacon" as one such profession. And if you've seen my previous posts about Modri, you'll know it's possible that he's actually saying "as I'm a deacon... even if it kills me" (in Japanese you can say this with the exact same words as "as I'm a butler... even in death")
Okay, then how do we know that Polaris wasn't also saying "deacon"?
FOL orphanage's Mastiff Class. If each of the classes are based on the four star lords, this is the one that corresponds to Polaris. The children are taught bulter duties and the skills required to run a large manor. Therefore we can assume that when Polaris said shitsuji, he did indeed mean "butler" and not deacon.
Meanwhile, all the signs point to Modri being a deacon, so we can assume that he was saying "deacon" when he called himself a shitsuji. Plus, if Polaris were Modri, all of the boys in Mastiff Class would've been running around in priest vestments...
other matters to consider:
Modri + Polaris's conflicting values - Modri serves his god, Polaris serves r!Ciel
2. Polaris does not mention God or demons even once
3. How Polaris wrecks his room vs. how tidy Modri keeps his room
4. Modri would 100% know who Ciel and Sebastian were beforehand if he were Polaris. And yet he didn't seem to know who Ciel was at all. (he only cares about Sebastian lol. which is definitely not the case for Polaris.)
I’m coming home, I’m coming home, Tell the world that I’m coming home, Let the rain, wash away, all the pain of yesterday, I know my kingdom awaits, and they’ve forgiven my mistakes, I’m coming home, I’m coming home, Tell the world that I’m coming, home.
How it started:
How it's going:

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Official hiatus to start
Hey guys, been slightly less active around here, but y'a know with good reasons (#pregnancy).
I refuse to believe, I'm the only one that saw that new panel and didn't make the connection back to the very first chapter!
They are mirroring!
someone on reddit asked this
and i imagined that he’s using him like this (don’t ask me why)
What I really love about How to Get to Heaven From Belfast is the way the show contends with trauma.
Margot's entire hypothesis is that by rejecting a traumatic event, by forgetting it, you can "become someone new," you can move on. But the show disproves that hypothesis.
Trying to "move on," trying to "forget" actually only brings more pain, more anxiety, more despair. Life remains off kilter for all of them. At the beginning of the series all of these women are stuck, are lost, are feeling out of place in some capacity — all because they haven't actually acknowledged the shit that's fucked them up.
For Greta and Jodie their separation— largely pushed by Margot— makes it so that they never actually get to talk about the church fire and all the guilt they hold about it. When Charles Sampson brings them together again, that's the first time that they might actually begin to process it. Jodie even says, "I want to tell my story... I am still there, in that place, on that night."
It's Jodie's desire to unpack that night and Greta's refusal to (first, with Sampson, and later, at Greta's house) that leads to Jodie's death — another accident, another point of trauma caused by refusing to think about and talk about the past.
Similarly, Saoirse, Robyn, and Dara have refused to discuss the night at the cabin since it happened. They end their friendship with Greta to "put it all behind them." Saoirse says early on "it DID happen" indicating that they have basically written it out of their memories (as best as they can). But it haunts them, it creeps up, because trauma doesn't just *vanish*
What is deeply tragic about all of their stories (Greta, Jodie, Saoirse, Robyn, Dara) is that if they had just TALKED about it, if they had held each other through all the grief and fear and guilt and agony, then they might have actually healed from it.
The show ends where Greta's trauma begins (the church yard), and it also ends with S, R, and D finally finding Greta (who symbolizes all the trauma they have from that night at the cabin). It is in the returning, the acknowledgement of the dark points in their youths that actually sets them free— well, not entirely free from the trauma, because it will always be there, but free from the weight of carrying it alone. They all have acknowledged it, come to some terms with it, and THAT is what will allow them to move forward, to become someone "new."
I think that that's the message I love most about this show: don't run from your trauma, look at it. Face it, however you need to.
I think that's fuckin beautiful.
I have to hand it to How to Get to Heaven From Belfast I wasn't expecting a secret organization of camp mildly unhinged lesbians mediocerly trying to disappear people for feminism but I am kind of here for it.

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One of my favourite moments in How To Get To Heaven From Belfast was actually at the nursing home, with Dara and Robyn. It’s not a super major moment or a particularly dramatic one when compared to a lot of other bits in the series but it’s so good for Robyn’s character.
Throughout the series we get a lot of jokes about her questionable parenting (+ relationship) choices because y’know. It’s a comedy. But in the nursing home scene, Robyn, who has also been least sympathetic to Greta throughout both sees through that old woman’s bullshit immediately and gives her a piece of her mind. It’s probably her most serious moment in the show.
Idk. Good scene. Good moment. I like that this is her most disgusted moment, when she’s talking to another mother who fucked up her kid so badly it caused the whole situation. I like that despite getting into multiple car crashes, accusing her husband of having an affair and all the various other shit she does in the series we’re shown why kids might feel safe around her. Shoutout Robyn.
“Right. This is the last. We gotta go to a wake, first thing. We cannot, under any circumstances, get hammered the night.”
HOW TO GET TO HEAVEN FROM BELFAST ; EPISODE 1
"People like us are just wired differently."
How to Get to Heaven from Belfast: Series 1 (2026)
PLEASE watch How To Get To Heaven From Belfast. It's a murder mystery and comedy by the creator of Derry Girls. it's got intrigue. It's got three women entering their 40s struggling with grief, guilt, anxiety, ptsd, and keeping secrets. One of these women is a neurotic tv writer, one is a repressed catholic butch lesbian, and one is a mother of three boys desperately trying to handle her anger issues while keeping her manicures looking fantastic.
All of the one-off and side characters are bizarre, disconcerting, or just plain weird and I love all of them. The murder mystery is one of the only one's I haven't been able to figure out before the last episode. It's colorful, it's suspenseful, and it's some of the best mystery writing outside Knives Out. It's so great to see women written as messy and strange and loveable and flawed as the ones in this show. I highly recommend watching it because I would love to see more shows like this out in the world.

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i think what has fascinated me the most in the last few chapters is the direction it has taken when it comes modri's motives for revenge.
(obviously mild ch. 227 spoilers ahead)
usually, when it comes to revenge-seeking characters, that purpose is either fully self-imposed ("they have wronged me/us, this is an insult to my/our honour") or or born directly from attachment ("i'm doing it for them, it is unfair, they need someone to avenge them and i love them enough to do it"). and you'd think modri would fit into the latter quite neatly, but... he doesn't. he's not very naturally vengeful it seems?
not only because he doesn't immediately show resentment towards the demon that is very obviously to blame for his suffering, but also because his go-to solution seems to always be to just put his fate into the hands of whatever higher power will take him in hopes that flopping over and behaving well will lead to good things (and that's what ends up leading him to revenge).
whether it's his christ-like old master, the devil, the demon-hunting order, the undertaker, or god himself doesn't change modri's behaviour much. with his master, obviously that mostly went well (and probably set the precedent that makes him behave like that). everything else? yeah, no, no matter how modri seems to accept his circumstances, they're all fucked. and yet, modri's desperation never fails to turn into acceptance through self-abandonment.
like, here he has just died an excruciatingly painful death that had him crawling on the floor right until the end. he has been brought back to suffer even longer still. he's still in so much pain. and yet, what does he think?
god has not forsaken me. all good then! hey, as long as god wants you to suffer, it's fine i guess!!
it doesn't make him angrier. hell, he doesn't even seem all that bothered by the dying part. it doesn't fuel the flames of revenge one bit. he's just doing it because that is how he serves god. such an interesting motive.
I KNEW I DIDN'T TRUST THAT GUY!!!
Well shit.
EXCUSE ME, WHAT DO YOU MEAN. You said "us" with way too much confidence. Are you reminiscing about the good old days from 100 years ago? You remembering your own past blud? Talking like you've had front-row seats for the last century.
Did I miss something or did someone just betray someone? 😭 MODRI DID YOU DO SOMETHING.
The way "Warwick" is phrasing it, the "betrayal" doesn’t feel random... it comes across as the end result of something that happened a long time ago. Maybe Modri did something he didn’t even realize counted as betrayal at the time.
I doubt Modri even realizes the implications of what he might’ve done; he sees himself as a Holy Crusader and to him, lying is essentially a sin.
Assuming the "Warwick" noble and the Hallelujah exorcist are the same person, he and Modri shared a clan in the past (and the same ideologies.) We don’t know the extent of their history, but if they were close, the Hallelujah guy might’ve come to see him as a very close friend or family over time. That would make Warwick's disregard for truth feel like the result of being deeply betrayed.
Cheap wine yesterday, Michelin vibes today? Someone's clearly undercover and LYING about their identity.
I'm going to scream. You obviously ain't a noble... and Italy being brought up is totally convenient. 💀
Right, so my dude is NOT human and the identity is fake. Awesome, nice. Yana, what now before I spiral again.
Plus, madame Yana really put them side by side before the tales even kicked off. OH THE IRONY.
Even a literal demon is side-eyeing him. Is that because he whooped your ass decades ago or simply because he's an exorcist? 🥴
Why is the century old demon fighter there? Working with UT? (Considering he's back as of Ch. 227, it'd add up.)