mx.miche. 🌸

It's never really over isn't it. You just come back whenever you want. This pain.. I'm still not over this pain.

I'm actually starting to miss you again. But I need to come to terms that one day you won't come back.

I believe in soul ties, I hope you somehow feel it too.

I so desperately want to find my twin flame. My person. If you're out there, I'll constantly be looking for you.

Can someone just take away this lingering, this yearning, this longing.. I don't know how much more of this I can take. I really can't. Why can't I move on?? Why do I still miss him? Why does my heart still want him so bad?

At this point I need more hoe's that I actually find attractive and worth talking to. Life gets boring ☠️

There has to be much more than this life.. I just want to be happy......

That attachment isn't as strong as it used to be but sometimes I'd wish you'd text me out of no where other than a 'wyd.' Sometimes I wish you'd ask if I want to hang out. Or try to catch up atleast. Part of me wishes that and another part hopes that all that bad karma eats you up and effects you because you deserve it after how horribly you treat(ed) me.

Why am I still waiting? When you proved to me many times that you don't care. Breaking no contact wasn't as exciting as it should have been. You didn't even look at me. Why am I still putting myself in his painful position while you go do whatever you please.

Sometimes I wonder why I was cursed to still have feelings for someone who no longer gives a shit about me and only wants to sleep with me. Someone who is so rude and fucked up towards me. Someone who has anger issues and strong narcissistic traits. I want to lift this curse if it's no longer meant for me. I'm so tired of waiting for nothing and holding onto the past. It still feels literally impossible for me to completely move on, especially if he still wants to be intimate. That'll only delay my healing process and he doesn't understand that. It was enjoyable at first but then it started hurting more and more.

This actually isn't enjoyable anymore. I'm not sure if I should let it reach it's third year. It only causes pain for me while he doesn't give a shit at all.

Lol I see how it truly is now. Wow.