Mercury's journals

We had finally reached the edge walls of Loftfall, and i couldn't wait to rush to the Oil Spot Inn, and have several, several pints of cherry ale. Siege and i both were all too excited to be free of the oh so watchful eye of the fucking Imperium and its unnecessarily large boarders. So you can imagine our fucking surprise to find Imperium banners flapping pretentiously in the wind, hanging down from the high grey stone walls of Loftfall. 

After convincing the guards a top the city wall that we were infact the Calamity’s who had just ended our fucking employ for the Imperium in the north they opened the city gates which in the past always sat open welcome merchants and travelers. Now once we were inside i was genuinely heart broken to find the city had gone to shit. Not heartbroken enough to stop me from making a b-line for my cherry ale mind you, but still properly saddened. Siege was the one who took notice of the wanted posted plastered all over the place. On them was the hooded face, of a woman with long red hair. i couldn't have cared less.

At last we had arrived at the Inn, and believe me it had seen better days. Tile pieces of the roofing had fallen on the ground, paint was peeling, and the door hung off its hinge. The inside didn't look much better. i walked up to the bar took a seat, ordered my coveted pint of ale and then asked the Bartender who turned his once great pub into ‘a steaming pile of goblin shit’. He chuckled brought me my drink and began to explain.

Apparently some long lost Heir to the throne had returned resulting in a very violent and very bloody Coup. He said that the entire royal family had been publicly executed or tried to flee. Shortly after this the new Heir more or less sold the kingdom out to be a satellite of the Northern Imperium. which has resulted in massive taxes on everyone in Loft fall, which is why my beloved Oil Spot had fallen into disarray. 

Now I'm no fucking historian but i know that the Northern Imperium’s history has be littered with some awful, deplorable, manipulative things, but i can say without a shadow of a doubt that over taxing this more innocent Inn into the shitter, is by far the most evil thing that they have ever done. But hey its none of our business, until of fucking course the wankers made it our business.

Just as we were finishing our first round, the Inn was stormed by a group of Imperium soldier, my absolutely favorite people. They demanded our presence in the new queens court. I wanted to kill them and make a run for it, but Siege agreed for us both to come, and so we went.

Alright so fucking hate royalty, everything about it, the smell, the clothes the way kings and queens fucking walk and talk. It's like everything just exudes pretentious arrogance, and let me tell you there has never been a more arrogant bitch than the high fucking queen, Sterlza the second.

Her thrown room was lined with pillars and statues. Tapestries hung from the ceiling depicting the queen doing various glorious deeds.

So we find ourselves standing unenthusiasticly before her throne listening to her monologue, about the glory of he newly reclaimed throne, and the blessed patronage of northern imperium

I stopped her, cut her off in the middle of her precious little rant. I told her I hoped she had pulled my brother and i away from our precious ale for something more important than her all to enthralling speech. She was stunned silent. Siege chuckled.

The the tall dark haired man at the queens right hand roared at me. He wore a polished suit of imperial armor. He screamed, I mean I was worried the vein or his neck would explode out of his skin, revealing itself to be a giant forest wurm and devour me! 'How dare I speak in such a manner to the queen!?' 'who do I think I am?!' 'I'm lucking I still have my life!' 'blah blah blah'. So I returned his line of questions with a proper solute from my favorite finger, which he certainly didn't like.

He drew his sword at my jesture, and before he could step to me, the queen raised her hand stopping him and making him put his sword back in his pants. She finally spoke plainly. The reason we were here was because an assassin was running about, killing her high ranking officials and since the mighty Calamity's happened to be passing through her newly stolen city she decided to hire us to do away with this assassin problem.

I didnt want anything to do with this, let alone help this stuck up bitch. But for the second time today, Siege agreed for the both of us. He said we probably wouldn't have been permitted to leave the city with our blades unstained if we refused, plus we could use the money. So now I'm sitting in an Inn waiting for nightfall, so we can go hunting assassins. Fantastic.

--

At last we are far enough south to wear normal fucking clothes. now dont get me wrong i look rather brilliant in a fur lined vest but its just nuce to be able to wear normal clothes again. Siege and i are about a day out from a city state called Loftfall, the home of one of my favorite inns. I can already taste that cherry Ale.

- -

So, the man with the scar on his face’s name was Baqar, just Baqar. Never trust someone with just one name, they keep secrets. See big boy Baqar was the dominus of a once prestigious gladiator house, the House of the Bull. He was hoping to find new glory in the fresh batch of young slaves. 

Either way, after a rather uncomfortable carriage ride we arrived at the estate of the Bulls, nice building with big pillars gold embellishments, plenty to steal. in the center of this massive estate is a sand courtyard. they line me and the 4 other fighters they chose up in the sand, slowly a crowd forms around the courtyard, veteran gladiators examining us. most of em looked like they’d been through the wrong side of a dragon; dirty, covered in scars generally ugly as fuck. 

They slowly but surely began looking us up and down judging us and murmuring. i flicked a few of them off, just in time to be embarrassed. leaning against a pillar looking judgmentally at me. so of course i smile and give here a wink. She looked away unimpressed. she was pale, with orange hair, and the greenest eyes id ever seen. i assumed she was a hand servant for the gladiators. before i had a chance to continue my courtship a voice came from above.

Not the the allusive voice of god, just Baqar a prideful asshole of almost equal caliber. he starts rambling about the history of his shitty gladiator house and how we should all be oh so grateful to join it. Now at that point i didn’t really care much for Baqar’s speech because i didn’t intent to stay here for long. believe it our not i was kinda tired of being imprisoned and for to fight over and over again and as far as i was concerned a coliseum was just a bigger pit. 

Just our brave lord Baqar finished his speech, he tells us all to bow. Now this was a problem, because back then i didn’t bow to any fucking body. So as everybody else slowly took a knee, i stood tall. Of course Baqar didn’t like that so he repeat himself, in respond i looked up at his and blew him a kiss. A large ogre looking gladiator then strutted over to me, raise his hand and smacked me across the face and told me to bow. So i obliged him, slowling bringing myself down to one knee, after which i firm planted my fist in his croch. he dropped like a rock clutching his groin and i rose and had a good laugh. which was promptly cut short by something smashing into the side of my head and knocking me out cold. 

cold night air woke me. Surprisingly enough i wasn’t restrained i was just in a corner of the barracks by a window. I lifted myself up and ignored the pounding in my head. the whole place was pretty quiet. a few men lay passed out at table, clearly unable to hold their drink. 

Then i noticed her, pretty little read hair girl spinning a spear like i ain’t never seen before. if i’m being honest, looking back, that was the moment i fell in love with her. But at the time i was more focused on escaping this Bulls pit. i gave the place i twice over. All the windows were bared my best bet was probably trying to get through the large iron front door. before i can get to it and really take a look i hear a voice. its the red haired girl and she informs me that the door is covered in runes and will be hard to break through. i was supprised that i got caught so easily, i mustive been losing my edge.

i turned to face her stepping out of the darkness on to the sands of the the small courtyard. i smile and ask her if she is gonna rat on me. her expression was cold and serious. Her eyes cut through me. she told me that if i could beat her in a fight she would help me escape, but if i lost i had to stay and fight for Baqar until freedom was earned or death was given. Now u have to understand that i am extraordinarily bad at turning down bets. so i smiled and agreed.

So we killed the wolf. He tried fighting but we out matched him, even in full dire wolf form. then he tried running, but i pinned his leg to the ground with a spear. and then he tried to beg for mercy, which if you have ever seen a man go from giant fierce beast to sniffling crying prisoner is pretty fucking incredible. 

Now i wanted to off the mutt, but Siege saw fit to show him mercy. so we made it very clear that if he continued biting innocent women and spreading his curse we would hunt him down, skin him and use his pelt as toilet paper. So hopefully it sticks

--

So picking up where i left off, i was sold to a gladiator auctioneer. i spent the next 3 months walking chackled through the dense forests of western Astoria, into the desert of Hannibala. Which was just a barrel of kittens ill have you know. Along the way we picked up plenty more young lads who were promptly chackled and thrown into line. Now this is only is only important because of two lads i met while trudging through a desert, Tristan and Xi. Tristan was short blonde kid that wouldn’t shut the fuck he talked more than i used to which is saying something. funny thing about it is the wanker made smile for the first time in almost two years. 

Xi on the other hand, was a cunt. Big bald and ugly. constantly talking shit threatening and belittling us it was like our small happiness was just something he couldn’t stand for. either way he was a proper cunt.

Anyway after a solid month of walking we arrived in Hannibala City. Now at the time it was the largest city that id ever seen in my life. There wear so many people in one place and it sorta felt they were yelling, which was was pissing hillarious. the streets were liked with merchants and full of shady looking men in selling everything from jewelry, to potions, to weapons, to magic spells. women with there tits out stood in the crowded street trying to coax passing men into alley ways, while kids are running around steeling food off of merchant tables. so generally after 2 minutes in the city, i was fucking in love. after either being in a cell or in a caged death pit for 3 years walking around outside, even shackled, feels great.

So the slavers lead us through the city until we finally turned a corner and we saw it; the Hannibala Colosseum. I had never seen anything that big before in my life. a massive circular build that reach up almost touching the lower hanging clouds. They toted us through one of the large arches into the tunnels that led to the sands of the arena. They unshackled us and pushed us all out onto the sands of the large arena. They’re were about 45 of us. Some of the boys collapsed immediately, finally taking their chance to rest from the long trip. That was a mistake.

The Arena could have easily seated 70,000 people, but only about 15 old looking men sat in the bottom row of seats across of where we were. One stood a spoke, “Some of you have what it takes to grace the sands of this arena, and some of you don’t. Show us what you’ve got, thin your heard.” suddenly a panel opened in the center of the arena and a table overflowing with weapons rose to the sands.  

For a moment non of us moved. Until Xi broke into a full sprint for the table. suddenly we were all running full sprint for the table. I grapped two kukris and then sprinted away from the  table to get my barrings. The next thirty minutes were a blood bath. Some of us were just a lot more skilled than others. young boy littered the arena gutted and bleeding out, a fair number by my own doing. tristan was pretty lethal with a rapier he grabbed and Xi swung two maces wildly bludgeoning anyone who got close.

 Just as he turned his attention to me and began his charge the man stood and spoke again. “Enough! you all have done well, truly there are warrior hiding within you all! now stand tall and proud, prepare to be chosen”

So our contract with the Northern Imperium is finally up, So Siege and i immediately started heading south out of this fucking cold. in some of the smaller towns we passed through he has been hearing this wild fucking tails of this werewolf who basically comes to town, bites one or several women, and then just leaves. Now, if your daft ill explain to you why that’s an issue. lycanthropy is a fucking disease. and if u go around willingly giving someone a dangerous disease then your a fucking cock sucker. I mean this poor Lases would just just turn randomly on a full moon, usually kill someone close to them, and then get executed by their townsfolk. So needless to say we are camped out around where this mutt was last seen, hunting him. 

but anyway tonight i figure ill try to write about the first time i fell in love. 

--

So after about 2 more years of killing dire rats and other enslaved boys, this changed. After having to kill a boy who couldn’t have been more than 8 years old i stepped out of my beloved caged octagon. and low and behold the fat greasy piece of shit who owned me was standing there waiting for me. Now this was weird because after a fight he was always too busy collecting his winnings to give a shit about me. 

but tonight the bastard greeted me with open arms. He laid is dirty hand rest on my shoulder as he guided me away from the cage and over to a table. He ordered to pints of ale, both for me. and told me to drink up, because id earned it. the ale tasted like rat piss but i drank it all, drinking proved to be another curse the old bastard gave me. 

The fattie looked at me with this sad smile on his faces. He was silent for a while then he spoke, in that grimy, low voice of his.

“Boy, i’m gone be honest, when i bout you i didn’t expect you to live past ya first time in the cage. But you proved my wrong didn’t ya? your went in that cage night after night four two years now and slaughtered every goddamn thing we through at ya. You made a cuntin’ fortune, my little demon.” 

something about him calling my that made my stomach turn, but the scarier thing was part of my liked the title. He went on.

“Unfortunatley you and i have to part ways. See you’ve aged out on this little octagon. Now i thought about setting you free, but then what would your life be? it would be wasted in some meaningless job. I just could bare to do that. not when you have greatness in ya. So im selling you to a gladiator house in Hanibala. They’ll train you up real nice. Don’t out there in the big city ya hear me. I want my little demon boy to become the greatest gladiator in all of Hanibala!”

He let me finish my drinks and then escorted me back for my last night in my little cell. the next day i began my trek to Hanibala.

--

do u know what i hate? frost trolls. cunting frost trolls. 

alright, so this morning SWiege and i were finally called into action, thank god too i was starting to think the only reason they hired us was to be cold and look pretty. Either way this morning this scrawny little lad, in armor that most certainly did not fit him, woke us up and told us that the commander requested our presence today with his battalion. so we suited up. I even got to wear my fur Pauldron, seeing as how its cold as piss up here. I strapped on my spears and we headed out of the tent. 

Now by far one of my favorite things is the way or reputation precedes us. I mean we walked through the encampment these fucking soldiers looked like they were gonna shit themselves. if they weren’t whispering about seeing the Calamitys up close, they were stunned silent. We met with the commander and marched into battle with his battalion. I’m not really a fan of that bloke, he thinks too highly of himself. Someone should tell him that defending a cold as piss city against barbarian, is in no way a crusade blessed  by the gods.

So we found ourselves in the heat of battle, siege and i had already killed a piss ton of these sorry barbarians, when low and behold i here the roar of a cunting troll. Oh not a normal troll, no that would be far to fucking simple. No its a sodding 30 foot tall frost troll. So yes today i killed a frost troll and now i have sodding troll blood in the fur of my favorite pauldron. The northern empire is absolutely not paying us enough for this shit. but i’m used to killing things bigger than me.

--

you are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skys are grey, you’ll never know dear how much i love you, please dont take my sunshine away.

On the morning of my 12th birthday mum woke me with her singing. She always did that. I loved her singing. she had made me breakfast. my favorite, egg sandwich. she reached into her pocket and gave me 7 gold pieces, which is amazing because its more than she would make in three months. She told me to have a good day and that she loved me. I of course couldn’t wait to spend my new fortune and rushed out not even telling her thank you.

i ran to Sieges house. we spent the day running about town, pulling pranks on town folks and pretending that we were assassins. i spend my entire fortune on a cheap dagger. I eventually  told Siege goodbye and i ran home, to show mum my new blade. I arrived home and flung my door open, to find my mother laying on the floor with a massive gash across her throat. Three men stood over her body. i couldn’t move. luckily i didn’t have to because someone hit me in the back of the head and i blacked out. happy fucking birthday to me.

The next few months are a bit of a blur. i was sold to a man, named Noblies. He was sort of like a walking zit, fat, greasy and generally un-fucking-pleasant. As his slave i was forced to fight and kill animals in dirty smelly pits, while the scum of the earth bet on my life. if i’m being honest i still have nightmares about dire rats and rabid wolves. After a full fucking year of killing animal with a rusty butchers knife, I found my self standing once again in a pit surrounds by the shouting of less than noble men, but facing me across the small octogon wasn’t some rabid animal. but another boy, with just as much fear in his eyes as me. 

He had a sickle, and i had a knife, which i will to this day argue the fairness of. I was surprised at how level headed this kid was swinging that sickle around. it took me half way through the battle to realize that the kid was singing. under his breathe but sure enough singin’ to himself. i figured Its what kept him calm.

So Siege thinks that i should keep a journal, and i remember that Alana would always say writing was a good way to find peace or some daft shit like that, so, here i am, author of the century 

My name’s Mercury, Mercury Azrael Drake, but everyone calls me Merc. I’m 25, i’m a mercenary, and i’m freezing my cunting balls off in an imperial encampment, outside the walls of a northern imperial city. Why you ask? because Siege likes to find us what are possibly the most pissing awful jobs possible. Siege is my brother by the way, By choice not by birth.

We are supposed to be helping defend this city from a northern tribe of barbarians. but since i have time i’m writing. Figure i’ll start at the beginning.  

~~

 i was born in a small town called Dragonsbrooke. Its a shit hole. I mean it is literally where dreams come to die. my mum was a bar maid, and made next to nothing. and my father left my mother before i was born, but we will get to that later. Mum didn’t make much so by the age of 7 i could pick pocket like a demon. i mean this cute little black kid could rob u fucking blind. not to mention i could out run anyone who tried to catch me. I actually met Siege around that age too. His mum was the rich daughter of some lord. He didn’t have a dad either though, and was kinda whiny and broody back then. well he is still broody, but less whiny,