pissbaby headquarters

The apocalypse happened here in 1620.

Fun fact: the reason wearing seatbelts became common in the US was because kids were trained to in school, and would constantly bug their parents to wear their own seatbelts. In my mom’s words, everyone was shamed by little children into behaving safely.

This is how I got my mom to quit smoking,,, by annoying the everloving shit oughta her at age 7

hearing a five year old yell across the yard that the neighbors were having a party and “its illegal!” is hysterical. 

I- I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THAT

if you as a father dont think your kid working with robots is cool as all fuck then you not only failed as a father but you failed at understanding what awesome is

Worth repeating often

Tragic! What made up profiteering bills it can we kill next, y’all?

STOP PLEASE

For everyone complaining about how these two can get arrested and it won’t affect their careers, you’re right. It most likely won’t hurt their careers. That’s why they keep going out and doing it. They’re using their platform to their advantage. They’re both white, of an older generation, and famous enough to be recognized. They’re holding their generation accountable and making an effort to show up and enforce change. This isn’t them advertising a TV show or some bs, they’re there to help

Recognizing you privilege isnt about feeling bad for things you can’t control, it’s about using your privilege to help those without it. This is what that looks like.

A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

oh shit my laundry

reblog to save someone’s laundry

fuck

Go get your tea/coffee from an hour ago while you’re at it.

I freakin love off the wall illuminati theories

“Off the wall”. Vans. Vans off the wall. Vans are also cars. Who drives vans? Creeps. Whos creepy? Slenderman. Slenderman wears a suit, so Natalia Kills would dissaprove. “Natalia Kills” has three A’s in it. a triangle has three sides. This post is illuminati confirmed.

I’m so happy tbh

You just proved it again. “I’m so happy tbh” has 12 letters in it. It also has 4 words. Guess what 12 divided by 4 is? That’s right- it’s 3. A triangle has 3 sides. Checkmate. Illuminati confirmed yet again. This is too easy.