wasteland, baby

Alex: Here is the Final Jeopardy answer. “This city was incorporated into the Roman Empire in 30 B.C. after the suicide of Cleopatra.” Good luck.

*Jeopardy theme plays*

Fran (loudly): Oop, dropped my earring, dropped my earring. Whoa, Nellie… Found it! Found it, found the earring.

Contestant: What’s going on?

Fran: I–I found the earring.

*Theme song ends*

Alex: Alright contestants, time’s up. Henrietta? What did you write down as your question? “What is Macedonia?” I’m sorry, that’s wrong. What was your wager? $4200, you risked it all. And that takes you all the way down to zero.

Fran: Enjoy the home game, honey. *laughs*

Alex: Well now let’s go to Stewart. His response was: “What is Cairo?” And unfortunately, he too is wrong.

*Fran snorts*

Alex: Your wager please, Stewart, was… $4199. That takes you down to $101.

Fran: Still like his tie, Stewie?

Alex: Fran?

Fran: Well, my mother and I were on our way to Israel, on El Al, and who was sitting next to us but Diana Kind (aka Barbra Streisand’s mother)? In COACH! They got a lot of unresolved issues, those two. On her way to see the pyramids in Giza.

Alex: So your response is Giza?

Fran: No, Mr. In-A-Hurry. But, talking about Streisand and Egypt reminded me of Omar Sharif, who, according to my funny girl trivia book, was not the first actor cast in the role of Nicky Arnstein, but was born in–

Alex: MISS FINE!!!

Fran (excitedly): What is Alexandria!

What she means: Cinderella’s given name is actually Ella. “Cinderella“ is the cruel nickname given to her by her stepsisters because she’s always covered in soot from the fireplace they make her sleep in.

Dumbo’s given name is Jumbo Jr. “Dumbo” is the cruel nickname given to him by the elephant women once they see his large ears. We never see a Jumbo Sr. so the implication is that his father is dead and those women are actually mocking a widow and her young child.