ignite & conspire @maybejoplin - Tumblr Blog

*having sex*

partner: how does that feel?

me [checking my mood ring]: uh… normal/cool

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factsinallcaps

CATS HAVE LIMITED OBJECT PERMANENCE AND DON’T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND THAT TWO DIFFERENT DOORS CAN LEAD TO THE SAME ROOM

factsinallcaps

thankyouforyourcooperation:

#SO IS THIS WHY MY CATS ASK TO BE LET IN BECAUSE IT’S RAINING #AND THEN IMMEDIATELY GO TO THE OTHER DOOR AND ASK TO BE LET OUT AGAIN?

YUP, THAT’S WHY. CATS ARE BIG DUMMIES AND OFTEN SEE NO REASON WHY TWO DIFFERENT DOORS SHOULD LEAD TO THE SAME PLACE, SO THEY FIGURE THEY’LL CHECK IF IT’S ALSO RAINING IN THE OTHER OUTSIDE BEHIND THE OTHER DOOR.

WHEN THE PROPRIETOR OF THIS BLOG WAS A CHILD, THE KITCHEN LED INTO THE DINING ROOM, WHICH LED INTO THE LIVING ROOM, WHICH LEAD INTO THE FRONT HALLWAY, WHICH LED BACK INTO THE KITCHEN, SO WHEN THE CATS WERE HUNGRY, THEY WOULD CHECK THEIR BOWLS, SEE THAT THEY WERE EMPTY, AND WALK ALL THE WAY AROUND THE HOUSE TO SEE IF THE OTHER BOWLS IN THE OTHER KITCHEN WERE ALSO EMPTY.

doomy

why is everyone screaming

factsinallcaps

FOR AN ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION, I ADVISE YOU TO LOOK AT THE TITLE OF THIS BLOG.

enjoy-the-life-baby

marisatomay

One of my clearest high school memories is of the time I asked my freshman bio teacher what he wanted to be when he grew up and he said “assassinated”

agraceful-disgrace

There’s a difference between being happy and being distracted from sadness

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thekidtheylove-deactivated20180

Teach ya sons it's okay to cry

thysilus

[me internally while someones talkin to me] wow they Really Think i kno wats goin on rn…

asdfghjkllkjjhgfds-deactivated2

choose people who choose you.

llleighsmith

anyway never underestimate the effect cleaning your space can have on your mood, it’s an energetic reset

loonyloomy

Just wanted to share this coming out story from a guy I saw on First Dates. He came out to his dad when he was 20, and then his mum when he was 21, after trying very hard to hide that part of himself and never really discussing anything like that in their household. Hearing his mother’s response after he explained all that was really gratifying. To all Muslim LGBT+ people, As-Salaam-Alaikum <3

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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bi-gays-blog

Ellen DeGeneres takes Caitlyn Jenner to task for her hypocritical comments on gay marriage

sealedbeastnue

when will Ted himself.. finally show up to the Talk ?

beangeneboy

The final boss

stray-suh-nur

You guys know TEDtalks stands for technology, entertainment and design talks right?

sealedbeastnue

I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer

bitterempress

1800’s French Military Uniform

Today’s Military Uniforms

where did all the style go

where was the time when you could just

out-fab your opponents

candlelion-deactivated20140107

do you really think it’s a good idea to take military advice from the French

miindt-deactivated20180429

REBLOGGING BECAUSE OF EVERYTHING OMFG

vaporwavevocap

Historically the “style” died in 1914 because the French would wear bright blue and red uniforms and the British said “that’s a bad idea” and the French said “we look great” then they got sniped.

accras

iu

instagram mua: shows a perfectly normal makeup tool

me: bitch dont do it

instagram mua: frowns, waves finger and throws it away

me:

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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serious

macarena-of-time-deactivated201

i love saying fuck me because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly

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