nothing lasts forever.

no please dont force me to make any decisions i’ll die

They call it the never afford anything and kill yourself economy

And I love you for that

Instead of an air fryer consider: sex reassignment surgery

How am I gonna cook these chicken nuggets

Why don't you ask my new vagina...

“are they lovers?” worse. they were supposed to be and never got the chance to

yeah actually we removed the big bad wolf from the little red riding hood story because portraying violence against minors is really messed up. yeah. yeah also the wolf narrative was really predatory and had had some icky grooming vibes and a fable meant for literal children shouldn’t have implied p*do shit and grape so now little red riding hood goes into the woods and nothing happens and she goes to grandma’s house. don’t worry our kids will still stick to the path and know not to follow to wolves implicitly because we told them to and children should always do as their told. just like little red riding hood does now.

has anyone else noticed that pretty much everyone who is worth knowing seems to be doing really bad all of the time and is never allowed a moment's respite from all the pointless cruelties and horrors ❓❓❓❓❓❓❓

whats everyones favorite cocktails. i totally adore a sex on the beach. no rum and coke okay i want your favorite gay ass colorful fruity tasting type of drink okay? okay. i trust you. i love you

Yaaaawn! Call me when they're covered in blood and having gay sex