all me nouns are amateurs

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

Joining the war of put baby in pelican mouth on the side of the pelican

it’s crazy to me that every seed in existence is a little chemical computer taking readings of temperature and moisture and minerals and all that to see if it’s able to grow yet and they’re doing crazy stuff like going into full dormancy and waiting for species-specific conditions etc etc and some seeds will do this in the size of a dust particle (see: orobanche) and some will pack in extra starch and food and do it in the size of a coconut or something… just dissected this flower seed at work that was a woody two-compartment capsule with one embryo per compartment, the whole seed a little smaller than a dime, and I swear to god it had a full soybean’s worth of embryo and food packed in there. it’s just unfathomable to me

Special shoutout to all the queer, intersex, and trans het folks. Sorry for all the “it’s illegal to be straight this month” jokes you’ll have to endure. Y’all are still very much part of the community.

[ID: Digital art of Gengar, a squart purple bipedal Pokemon with large red eyes and a huge grin. It is sticking its tongue out and jumping up, arms and legs spread out. End ID]

i love that Stratt canonically orders people to clap for Grace when he does something good. and it happens multiple times

this morning my coworker and I were evaluating some beans and I said ‘man these beans look pretty good’ and he was like ‘meh I’ve seen better’. top ten exchanges that have happened for thousands of years in every language ever spoken