Bad Habits
I’ve got a bad habit with bad habits
I’m a recovering drug addict
I do good
Then relapse
And then I collapse
It’s a struggle within my brain
I can’t seem to control it
Life’s moving so fast
And I don’t know how to slow it
I’ve been around for some years
And I got a lot to show for it
But none of it would’ve appeared
Had my momma not died
So can I really claim these accomplishments?
I feel like I haven’t accomplished shit
I always end up back where I started
Am I going insane?
Or am I just retarded?
Cause I’m always doing stupid shit
Shit that doesn’t make sense
Like, why would I abuse myself?
My mental and physical health
Is suffering because of my decisions
Because of my addictions
I try to go straight,
But end up back in the mix
Mixing ingredients,
They serve my drink
I drink and drink and drink
I’m lead on by temptations
Feeling the sensations
I just want to feel good
But in the end
I only hate it
I want to be normal
Go back to being sober
It’s hard when my friends
Always want me to go over
They don’t see that I’m struggling
Knees weak, almost buckling
I always keep a straight face
So they can’t see that I’m hurting
I just wish that I could live
Without all of these burdens
That’s the daily struggle
Get up and go hustle
This time for sure
This time for real
I will strive to be the best
I will dive into the depths
I will work hard
And end up on top of Everest
Forget the rest
They don’t know me
Even if they my homies
Cause if they was my homies
They’d listen and be there for me
I’m a grown man,
And I take full accountability
But at the same time
My surroundings are what is
Killing me
I need to step back
And readjust
I need to step back
And keep it
Just us
That’s me, myself and I
Cause that’s all that’s going to be there
When it’s my time to die

















