Mary Isis Connection

You might be wondering, why would anyone at the end of their life want to do psychedelic medicines? There are various reasons why this option can be so valuable for people who are facing one of the most important moments of their lives. 

For many people facing a terminal illness there can be a lot of fear/distress around the death and the dying process. In addition to physical pain, anxiety and depression are common for terminally diagnosed people and the treatment usually administered for these mental health conditions often involve more long term therapies and treatments. Psychedelic can offer more time-efficient results for improving the moods and attitudes of people facing their end of life. They may also provide patients profoundly meaningful and transforming spiritual experiences.

There are three categories of psychedelic medicines that are most often used in end of life/palliative care: “Empathogens” (which include MDMA), “entheogens” (LSD, psilocybin) and “dissociatives” (Ketamine). MDMA produces an increase in the “feel good” neurotransmitters serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine, which can bring a sense of empathy, openess, connectedness and acceptance. Psilocybin and LSD bind to serotonin receptors in the brain (just as certain anti-depressant drugs do), which can provide new and valuable psychological insights as well improve cognitive function. Ketamine is an NMDA receptor antagonist, as well as an anesthetic. It blocks certain neurotransmitters from unlocking the receptor site, which can prevent the over stimulation of neurons, which over time can cause damage to brain cells. Ketamine can provide immediate relief for physical pain as well as relief from mental and emotional turmoil, by helping the patient separate from themselves. Side note: Many neurodegenerative diseases, including Alzheimers and Parkinsons and other central nervous system disorders are sometimes treated with medications that are NMDA receptor antagonists.

Enacting a RITUAL is a way to create a sense of CONNECTION to the intention and/or prayer and to really anchor it in a symbolic and meaningful way. And the beautiful thing about RITUAL is that YOU get to create it, so that it feels powerful and meaningful to YOU!

Having a regular ritual practice can assist one in maintaining a sense of connectedness with life and the power of their energy and attention. You can have a regular space in your home where you enact your rituals, such as your altar space. And you can also enact rituals out in nature. 

Here is an example of how I create and engage in ritual:

I first create a sacred space through shifting my energy and attention. I take some deep slow breaths and ground myself into a calm and centered awareness, letting go of any other concerns and activity. 

If possible I like to light a candle. I then speak out loud an invocation to bring myself to a state of presence and humility.

 In Ritual, I personally choose to speak my invocational and intentional words out loud because I feel the power in it. SOUND has the power to transform- it literally vibrates the cells of our body. However there are times when I enact ritual in silence- basically I do what feels true and right in my being. 

I express words/feelings of gratitude to bring my being to an elevated emotional state (Feeling gratitude raises your frequency and brings more coherence to the being). 

Once I feel like I am in a clear, positive vibration I state my intentions whole heartedly.

I then like to make an offering of some sort- usually I like to offer some herbs/plant medicines to the earth and perhaps burn some incense to symbolically carry the prayer/intentions up in the smoke. Making offerings is an act of reciprocity- giving back for all of the ways that we are given to and supported by the forces in life. Reciprocity is foundational to harmony and balance in our world.  

When it feels complete, I close the Ritual with the simple words “Thank you! And so it is!” And I make some sort of sound, such as the shaking of my rattle.  

(FYI-This is a blog I wrote years ago for my friend Sky Kubby's online store/blog "Medicinal Foods" and I just realized I never actually posted the blog on my own blog! I absolutely love Black Cumin Seed oil and believe in its healing powers.... Enjoy!)

Being a native to the Middle East and South West Asia, the cultivation of this Nigella sativa can be traced back over 3, 000 years, to Ancient Egypt. This seed is actually not even related to the “Cumin” seed that we know of, which resembles caraway, so its name can be misleading. 

Even the prophet Mohammed proclaimed Black Seed as “a remedy for all diseases except death.” Black Seeds with honey, an ancient recipe, which was found in King Tutankhamen’s tomb, is still used my many people to this day for digestion, respiratory ailments and more.

Black Seeds are used in many dishes in the Middle East, as well as India, yet it is argued by some that the cooking of the seeds may decrease some of the medicinal aspects.  Others believe that the tempering of the spice is what brings out the medicinal qualities.

Consuming the ground up black seeds can be helpful for easing digestive troubles, flatulence, clearing parasites, and have also become an alternative treatment to battling cancer. However, many prefer the oil for economic reasons and wider range of use. Simply, with the oil, you can get more of a potent dose with a smaller amount.

There are so many potential nourishing and restorative qualities of this precious oil, but one needs to know what to look for as the consumer to get a good product. 

First of all, be sure the oil you use is cold pressed and organic, to assure the integrity and purity. 

Second, due to certain chemical constituents present in the oil, such as the Omega fatty acids, this oil (similarly to flax oil) should not be heated as these constituents can be chemically altered and become disadvantageous to the body. 

Third, the proper storage of this oil would be in a dark colored, preferably glass bottle and to keep it cool or refrigerate it, especially after opening. A daily recommended dose is 1 teaspoon of oil, and for more medicinal effects, not around too much food. 

It can be taken in capsules, or simply swallowed from a spoon. Using this oil on the skin and hair is deeply nourishing, however the smell is quite strong (in a spicy and savory way) so combining essential oils may help to create a most supreme healing, anointing oil. 

Autoimmune disease and cancer are huge problems in today’s society. Thymoquinone, one of the chemical constituent in Black Seed Oil, is of great interest to scientists, because its been shown to actually kill cancer cells, act as an anti-inflammatory and stimulate Opioid receptors which could help treat or prevent food allergies.

Even the big corporation Nestlé applied for a patent in 2010 which would protect their extraction process and the use of this chemical from Nigella sativa, which expectedly caused mass protest and controversy from upset people who felt a big corporation should not be able to own and control a natural chemical or people’s right to use it.

The knowledge and use of Black Seed Oil is becoming very common these days, just look it up on the internet! 

There are oil pulling blends which use this oil , luxurious body washes, and even a “Kardashian Beauty” brand of oil for the hair! 

The truth is, this oil alone can be used for a wide range of things, and is revered by the ancient and modern healers and scientists.

Lastly, I'd like to leave the readers with an image of this beautiful flower from which these precious black seeds come from. It may look familiar to you because, perhaps, its relative "Love in a mist" flower is already growing in your garden. If so, why not make some space in there for Nigella sativa too.

References:

sciencedirect.com aritcle

theblessedseed.com/learn-more/history/

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2583426/

wakeup-world.com/2013/01/02/black-cumin-seed-oil-the-miracle-oil/

I had the delight and blessing to be able to venture out with a small group of people to the mountains on Chihuahua Mexico with the intentions of meeting and connecting with the esteemed pianist and composer Romayne Wheeler and the indigenous people (Rarámuri) that live in that region. Additionally, in the week of our time there, we were wanting to gather footage to create an inspirational documentary film about Romayne Wheeler’s life, how he came to live with the Rarámuri people, which led to his actualization of his life’s higher purpose- being of service and making a positive difference through the creation and sharing of his music. 

In this blog I would like to share with you a little about this beautiful and amazing story, the interesting history and culture of the Rarámuri people and what we hope this documentary film will inspire in those that watch it.

To start, my dear friend, Curt Cetraro, invited me on this trip because Romayne has deeply touched and inspired him and he wished to share the experience of this simple, yet majestic way of life out in this mountainous region with others. Because of my own musical background, he also felt that I would find inspiration and have my own creative ideas to contribute to this filming project and also the non-profit organization “Music Making a Difference,” which Curt created in order to carry on Romayne’s legacy. Below is a photo of Curt and I, in front of the cathedral in Chihuahua, the day before we headed out on a small 6 seater Cessna plane out to the mountainous region of Retosachi.

Curt has been a very supportive ally in my musical journey. I originally met him in a yoga studio at a musical sharing of my own in Sacramento, through mutual friends. On that first meeting he told me he would like to see me perform in a bigger venue and that he’d be happy to help make happen. Curt is the kind of person that follows through with his word. A year or so later, he organized a wonderful concert at the beautiful Harris Center performing arts venue in Folsom, on the Winter Solstice where myself and other visionary musicians Shim Shai and Chad Wilkins got to share our music! He also funded the creation of my gorgeous, custom made ukulele from TYDE Music- that is literally the most beautiful work of art for an Ukulele that I have ever seen! That all being said, I just wanted to make the point that Curt is the kind of person that us independent artist/musicians NEED and Appreciate SO MUCH! He KNOWS in his heart the power that Music has to truly MAKE A DIFFERENCE in the world and in the hearts of Humanity. 

Curt, as well as two others in our group Andi and David, had already been out to this place the year prior. For myself and the two film maker friends from Costa Rica, Juancho and Paula, it was our first experience out there. After our first night of getting to meet and know each other at the hotel in the city of Chihuahua, we flew out bright and early the following morning over the stunning mountains and valleys, about a 40 minute flight, to our destination- a dirt air strip atop a mesa in a region called Retosáchi. (Retosáchi in the municipality of Guachochi, Chihuahua, which is in the Sierra Madre Occidental range — also known as the Sierra Tarahumara.) About 450 families are scattered throughout the area. On this particular mesa lives Romayne and a number of other families. There is also a small hospital and school, both created and sustained through the funding of Romayne’s support. 

It was so breathtaking, approaching the mesa and seeing Romayne’s house (affectionally called “The Eagle’s Nest”) sitting on the edge of tall, sheer cliff- knowing I would be staying in that house for the next week. Upon landing we were greeted by Romayne, his helpful female companion Marichu and a pack of dogs (which he kept off the runway with the dog food “croquettes.”)

In addition to being pianist and composer, Romayne is also a painter, poet and philosopher- and he has the profound gift of utilizing whatever surrounds him for inspiration for his creations. 

A little background story about this remarkable human-  “He was born to Born in 1942, he grew up in California, graduating from high school in 1960. Already writing music at age 7, in 1952 he heard Segovia give a concert in San Juan, PR and on the spot determined to become a musician. He went to Austria in 1961, spent a year in Salzburg then studied in Vienna for a total of 12 years, earning degrees in composition and as a concert pianist. Returning to the USA, he started touring and playing, nationally and internationally, which continues today. During a weather-delayed trip in New Mexico in 1980, he came across a copy of National Geographic magazine in an Albuquerque café which featured a story on the Rarámuri. He spent 1980-1981 hiking the area and sleeping in a tent. He teemed up with a young Japanese tourist who knew no Spanish, but was an expert in origami (making designs out of paper) which endeared them to the Raramuri. Having spent time earlier with the Hopi, he describes meeting the Rarámuri as “coming home”. In Creel he met Father Verplanken SJ who painted a stark picture of the Rarámuri needs. Wheeler contributed three quarters of his earnings to the St Teresita hospital in Creel from 1985-2000.The connection between the world of nature and the world of the soul is what Romayne Wheeler finds in the life of the Rarámuri. As a composer he creates music which is in tune with the nature which is all around him in the sierras. “I have finally arrived where I yearned to be” he says. But he needs to go back regularly to the modern world to perform concert tours for income to support his local projects.” - https://www.amigos3.com/romayne-wheeler-in-the-copper-canyon/

My friend Curt learned of Romayne a handful of years ago, through a mutual friend who would often speak about him with much admiration. Curt finally was determined to meet this man and so he began corresponding with him by email and finally found a way to go out there, which then beautifully altered the course of his own life. Curt found great inspiration from Romayne’s wisdom, genius and selfless service and also was deeply moved by the Raramuri’s values and humble ways of life.  Romayne and Curt developed a special friendship and trust and he soon felt a desire to also be of service. Curt began organizing piano concerts for Romayne and sharing his music with friends. Romayne, now 80 years old, is feeling like he doesn’t have the energy to continue his usual world touring which then created the predicament: “How will I continue to support all these families’ ways of life?”  And so, Curt has created a new nonprofit organization for this purpose: “Music Making a Difference.” 

Below is a candid photo I took of Curt and Romayne from the loft where I slept in the “Eagle’s Nest.”

You see this giant Steinway Grand piano? Can you imagine how a piano like this got out to this remote area and placed in this dwelling on a cliff overlooking the canyons? I will tell you- (one of the many wonderful stories we heard from Romayne). The piano was driven into the area in the back of a large truck which was filled with potatoes. The potatoes kept the piano from moving around in the truck. When it finally arrived to this mesa, after hours and hours on long dirt roads, a bunch of the local people helped to lift this piano out and place it here, with the potatoes being divided up amongst them as payment for their efforts. After being in this house I still can’t fathom how they got this piano in there- Its almost as if this house was built around it. This house is literally built into the side of cliff. the upper loft where I slept and lower level where Romayne sleeps (next to his piano) are connected by a narrow metal staircase. The wall connecting the lower to upper part of the house is the natural rock (as you can see in the photo below) But let me back up a little....to before this house was ever built....

Also, in case anyone is interested, Romayne has written some really beautiful books about his life with the Raramuri, including many wonderful, heart touching stories- I enjoyed reading from these books while I was staying there in his house. It was really special even getting to meet many of the people he spoke about in these stories.

Romayne spends an average of six hours a day at his piano, playing, practicing and composing. On a table near his piano are stacks of compositions he has written, all organized in their folders according to Opus number. On another table are more stacks, some works in progress, with calligraphy pens nearby which he uses to create his compositions. In his little office area are many books and music compositions by other composers like Chopin, Gershwin, Schubert, Liszt and Bach. In a large treasure chest type of container were stacks and stacks of more of his original handwritten compositions! I didn’t mind at all listening to him “practice.” Sometimes he would play certain “phrases” of a song over and over as exercises. For his concerts he often plays a mixture of his own original compositions, as well as favorite classics that people love hearing, such as Gershwin’s “Rhapsody in Blue” and Schubert’s  “Ave Maria.” One evening I requested he play Ave Maria and I accompanied him with singing. 

When Romayne first came to this area 40 years ago, he knew he found his home. Beginning in 1991, he lived his first few years there in a cave below and not far from where his house is currently. He would tour for a couple of months out of the year in many countries, doing concerts, and then he would return to his cave abode where he slept on the ground on woven mats. He and his friend Juanito would cook basic food in that cave with a fire and he would play piano and compose music with his solar powered keyboard. Before Romayne’s arrival, the indigenous people out there had never heard the sound of a piano. The way they described is was “the sound of the rain.” Below is a photo of Juanito, showing us the cave where he stayed with Romayne. After a few years of this Juanito suggested building a house up above, on top of the mesa. Thus, the “stone house” was built, which took more than a month to build. 

Also, nearby the cave that Romayne lived in there are some other caves that have very old drawings in a red pigment that even the Rarámuri do not know who made them. What we were told is that they come from “a time when there was giants.” (see photos above)

I’d like to share more about what I learned about the Rarámuri ways of life. I would like to make the distintion: “Tarahumara” is the name given to these people by the Spanish, and is still commonly used when referring to these people, however I am intentionally using the name by which they refer to themselves: Rarámuri- which can be translated to mean “runners on foot.” Indeed these people are known widely for their amazing ability and endurance in long distance running- as it is part of their life! Villages can sometimes be many miles apart from each other. They have adapted to walking and running long distances in their traditional sandals (huaraches). In fact racing is a part of their traditional custom that has competitive and ceremonial aspects that serve the community. We got to witness one of these races on the day that there was a fiesta. Six men participated in the race. We watched in amazement as they ran back and forth along the mesa, kicking their carved wooden balls along with them. (see below)

Above is Juanito showing us some of the balls that he carved for us in a beautiful woven basket made by his partner. Juanito, like quite a few other Rarámuri people, has travelled to other countries to run in races. Its kind of funny to see many of the men wearing various racing shirts. We actually met a rather famous Rarámuri marathon runner who came for the fiesta, named Arnulfo Quimare. He was featured in the well known book “Born to Run.” (photo below)

The Rarámuri are a fiercely resilient people. Originally they lived throughout the state of Chihuahua, however in the 16th century, they retreated into the mountains to resist Spanish conquest and Christian conversion.  Through all the struggles and resistance they still maintain their language, which belongs to the Uto-Aztecan family. They grow their crops of maize (corn), beans, squash, greens and tobacco. They also raise cattle, goats and sheep. Where we were we most commonly saw goats. They do not consume too much meat, only for special ceremonial occasions. From Spanish influence many other fruit bearing trees have been introduced into the area for food, such as apples, peaches, apricots, figs and oranges. They weave beautiful baskets from a leaf from a plant that grows plentifully in the area and they use these baskets for gathering and for keeping their corn and tortillas in. While we were there, many women were busy weaving baskets to sell to us. One basket took them a day to make. I definitely brought quite a few baskets back with me! Below is Juanito’s partner, Raijina.

Above is our friend Porfirio, at his work bench, where he made us traditional style sandals (made of up-cycled tire rubber) and also where he carved some wooden balls. One day he took us on an outing to the next mesa over, about an hour’s walk. He shared a lot with us (in Spanish-and thankfully translated by our film-making friends) about the Rarámuri ways of life, the hardships and also what is most important to him and that which brings him joy. For him, a good day’s work in his gardens and corn fields gives him great satisfaction. He also loves playing music. 

For the Rarámuri, their survival is their first and foremost concern- and that is dependent on food and water. Their success of their crops is of utmost importance and the Rarámuri. On our walk with Porfirio, we walked through many beautiful corn fields, plentiful with other blooming flowers, and lots of bees buzzing.  For a long time these people did not have easy access to water. Although there are streams that run in various places, they are not easily accessible by many. Water tanks have been constructed in various locations with solar water pumps which work to pump water to houses. They also gather rain water from the roofs (now that the roofs are made out of corrugated metal). Electricity is also not commonly accessed out in this region. In the winter it gets freezing out there, snow and all! Porfirio expressed that more warm clothing is definitely needed. Below are some photos of some of the basic living situations. The homes are typically made out of mud brick. Food is cooked in pots over a fire either inside or outside the home. Each home usually has a garden containing some supplemental vegetables such as peppers, squash or other greens/herbs. I also saw quite a few fruit trees planted around the houses. Porfirio expressed the importance of attaining seeds for growing plants. When I shared with him some golden berries on a hike he wondered if he could try to grow them from the seeds inside.

Their cultural values are based on the “four directions,” which is symbolized as a cross. This can often times be misinterpreted as a Christian cross, in fact during their ceremonies they utilize wooden crosses which look very much like the Christian crosses but they are not. The Four directions is also akin to the Tree of Life. The South (the Roots) is the value “Korima” - sharing and reciprocity. This value is foundational to the resilience of the community- food and resources are always shared. Hoarding is very frowned upon, and stealing even worse- and this is rare amongst the Rarámuri. Although things are shifting due to outside influences, generally the Rarámuri do not attribute value to “things”- value is based on what is useful to their actual survival. The West is Humility. The Rarámuri are very humble and very soft spoken and quiet people, and can be perceived as shy- there is no boasting or gossiping. The incessant chatter of Westerners can often be overwhelming to them. An example of their gentle nature is the way the greet each other: by touching the tops of the fingers lightly. To grab their hands and shake them would be aggressive for them. The North is maintaining Connection to Creator (through the fontanel on the head)- this is where we receive guidance and inspiration. And finally the East is the value of creating Happiness through Music. For the Rarámuri, music is regarded as a bridge to eternity.

 Now I’d like to share more about the role music plays in their life. The two most commonly played instruments are the violin and the guitar. Obviously these instruments were adopted from other cultures however they have integrated them into their ceremonies and fiestas. The songs that are played have a revolving melodic theme, that almost sound like Irish jigs- so interesting! And their dance, known as the matachin may also have origins with the Spanish, however they have made it their own. As I listened and observed, I could see and feel how they would become completely absorbed and present in the music and dance.

Flute and drum are also a part of their musical ways, however these instruments are ONLY played in the months of February-April (to call in the new life of the Spring season) and are forbidden to be played any other time because it is believed that it will disrupt the natural cycles. I was ignorant of this and I had brought my native American flute with me. One day I thought I would play the flute out on the cliff. There was some inkling in me that felt uneasy about doing so and so I did not continue to play t for very long. I later had showed Romayne my flute and he nonchalantly told me, “that’s very nice but flute is not to be played this time of year, Years ago I almost got thrown off the cliff from playing a flute when I shouldn’t have....” I don’t know how much he was exaggerating but I took it very seriously. By the way, Romayne is an epic storyteller- speaking with eloquence melodic inflections of his voice. 

 During the opening ceremony on the day before the fiesta, we watched as the elder of the community, Candelaria, brought out three crosses to a clearing, arranged them, with cloth laid over them. These crosses are symbols of their “Four directions”- the fundamental life values of the Rarámuri.  Candelaria is the daughter of Luciano, who was a beloved medicine man and musician of that community, also a  mentor/”godfather” figure to Romayne.)  

We watched from afar in quiet respect as the area was then sanctified with incense (pine resin in a clay incense holder) and then sprinkles of Suwiki, which is their well-loved fermented corn beverage. There were invocations/prayers spoken to the four directions.  Two goats were brought down to the altar space and tied up. A few other women came out and were cleansed with smoke. We watched in awe as these goats were blessed and then killed and strung up on a tree nearby to be cut up in parts which would then be cooked into a stew for the following day.  While the goats’ souls were being liberated from their bodies  there were songs being sung by Juanito (see video below)

The following day, there was a race in the morning and right after that was a fiesta. The families of that particular area came to attend, which really weren’t all that many people. The fiesta began there in the same clearing area near the altar with song and dance. First, it was the women who danced while Juanito sang and shook the rattle. Marichu, Andi and I also got pulled in by the women to dance. And then the music shifted to violin and guitar songs and Juanito and others danced. Juanito put on special ankle rattles that had butterfly cocoons on them. The Suwiki by that time was being served to all. After a while the festivities moved closer to the house where we had watched the women days earlier grinding the corn for their Suwiki.  I also had the honor of getting to accompany the musicians with my ukulele- I think it was the first time they had seen an ukulele! See videos and photos below!

At the fire, a young woman (I think Candelaria’s grand daughter) was cooking up tortillas by the fire where there was also the big clay pot of the goat and corn stew. We all were given some to eat. During this trip I most certainly ate bean and corn every day there- the tortillas were really delicious and hearty. Honestly I could gratefully eat beans and tortillas everyday. 

And the Suwiki kept on coming around in plentitude. The musicians and dancers were definitely becoming quite inebriated. I was told by Romayne that often times it is during the fiestas that a man and woman might come together and “go disappear somewhere, maybe in a cave” and after that they would be a couple. Because of their very shy nature, Romayne shared, the Suwiki assists in openness in sharing their affection. Marriage as we know it doesn’t really exist there- people just come together there, and start having babies and just take care of one another.  

When Children get old enough to steadily walk and talk the parents leave them with the goats to begin their learning of how to be with and herd the animals. It is in the home and family unit where the real education happens. As I mentioned before, there is a schoolhouse on the mesa for the children, funded by Romayne, so they can learn to read and write learn mathematics. We visited there one day. There were only a handful of students, all quite young. These young children actually would sleep there with one of the adults, at the school in a room with provided beds for the few days of their school week, because their homes were so far away to walk. The older children had already moved on to the other school on the next mesa over. I was glad to see on the wall of the room the numbers, written in their Rarámuri language. 

As I mentioned before there is also a hospital in the mesa. About twice a month a doctor comes from the neighboring city (which takes bout 4 hours of driving on remote dirt roads) to do check-ups for people in the region. Below is a photo of the hospital.

Now I would like to express some of the more complex issues that arose in our group during this week. While we had the privilege to be out in this remote area of Mexico and connect with the Rarámuri and also learn about their ways of life, many feelings surfaced around Colonization, climate change, the impact of Western materialist/consumerist influences, and how we as privileged “white people” could be of best support to Indigenous people, such as the Rarámuri. Since we were there to connect with, learn from and to also create a documentary film about Romayne and the Rarámuri people we wanted to feel like our impact would be a positive one. 

Even while immersed in the peace and majesty of this remote mountainous region, we saw the evidence of corruption of their natural harmonious ways of living- due to the influx of commercial commodities, products wrapped in plastic, alcohol, sugar, etc.  It was a disappointment to see the garbage strewn all over the environment in these beautiful places- but the truth is- its all the garbage from modern Society that is brought in to these rural indigenous communities and there has yet to be established a common understanding of how this garbage is ultimately harmful to the earth and the beings living here. Before the arrival of modern day life (and the plastic garbage that comes long with it) all the materials were natural and biodegradable. Their  “food wrappers” were made of corn husk (and for the most part they still are!).

On our very first day when we foreigners gathered with Romayne in his “eagle’s Next,” next to his piano to discuss a “game plan” of how to proceed with the filming of this documentary and what REALLY was the intention behind it and what did we wish to accomplish with it. We included a few other respected people of the village to include their valuable input, of what they felt was important for us to try to convey through the documentary film. 

These are some insight gems from this experience and throughout our week:

1. Modern, Western materialist society has become disconnected to Nature and are suffering greatly because of it. Indigenous People, such as the Raramuri’s ways of life are of major VALUE to our modern materialist society because they can teach us the importance of staying connected to Nature and to the fundamental Values that make Life worth living (i.e. the “four directions”).

2. The responsibility that we have as “privileged white people” is to heal this disconnection through connective and restorative action and to also BE OF SERVICE to and Sacred RECIPROCITY with the indigenous people’s, whose lives and lands we have benefitted from. This “service” and “reciprocity” is not necessarily going to look how WE think it should- We need to examine our ingrained colonizing mentalities to realize that we do not always KNOW what is best for others.

3. A life of SERVICE through the ACTUALIZING of one’s natural Gifts is a source of deep fulfillment and brings inspiration for others who bear witness of it. In this case- Romayne found his deep fulfillment in Life through the giving back to the people and ways of life that so deeply touched his life- through the gifts and talents of his musical genius. Romayne’s unique story is an inspiration for people who also have the desire to “make a difference” in this world. 

4. In this ever spreading globalization and all the positive and negative impacts that come with it, there are precious living treasures of wisdom that continue to persevere-whether it be deep in the Amazon rainforest or high is the Sierra Tarahumara- and these people and ways of life have much to teach us about what it truly means to be human and how the quality of our lives depend on the quality of Life itself.  We are all truly connected.

(All photos by me)

Overview and Introduction

This beautiful mushroom has allured human beings for who knows how many millennia. Archaeological evidence shows that people carried this mushroom from the Eurasian continent over the Bering strait to North America during the last glacial era, which shows how important this mushroom must have been to them.

There are so many examples of this iconic mushroom being woven into humanity’s evolution- from ancient cave art etched in stone to carved stone statues of various indigenous cultures to frescoes painted on the walls of Christian chapels to the stained glass of Catholic church cathedrals.  This mushroom, no doubt, has played a significant role for humanity, just as many of the other powerful and healing plant and fungi allies: cannabis, psilocybin mushrooms and ayahuasca, just to name a few. Just like a lot of things, over time, knowledge can be lost- and I could also say hidden or withheld from the populace. Over time this magical and majestic mushroom became misunderstood, judged and yes, feared.    

A seeker of truth will discover how knowledge has intentionally been kept from people, in the efforts to preserve an elite group of peoples’ power, and in other words, to prevent people from empowering themselves. This is what propaganda is for, and now, arguably, even our mass media is being utilized for this. “Fake news” is a real thing.

Many people are still emerging from the brainwashing of the “war on drugs” propaganda, that was unleashed on the American population, which unfortunately created a lot of stigma around psychotropic and entheogenic plants and fungi. It is now fairly common knowledge that the pharmaceutical industry had a major role in creating the majority of drug dependencies that led to the “opiate crisis” and now they’ve created even more drugs (such as methadone and naltrexone) to help us get off the other “bad” drugs (heroin, and other opiates). Terribly, these “drugs to help us get off the drugs” are actually even more difficult to get off from. I’d say, now there’s a full on “benzodiazepine crisis” going on.  Last year, when I finally got myself a primary care doctor, and I shared with her that I had been really struggling with anxiety, can you guess what was her response to that was? “I could prescribe you some medication to help with that.” I never returned to her.

It’s obvious that so many people are in dire mental and emotional support but sadly the hamster wheel reality that so many people are living in makes it very difficult for people to slow down and get the support they need.  Yet, I will say that once a person makes the decision to change and take charge of their own healing- support can and will show up from all directions. The reason why I know this is true is because I have experienced it myself. I believe that we are all here for a reason and the universe wants each and every one of us to stand in our power. As the saying goes, “Where there’s a will, there’s a way….”

Now that much more traction is being gained in the tremendous value of “entheogenic/psychedelic medicines” through scientific studies as well as the recognized value of indigenous wisdom ways, it seems that the knowledge of this powerful red mushroom has found its way back to our lives. As we the people, who evolved over thousands of years in close relationship with these powerful mushrooms and plant allies of Earth, is in not exciting to think, what role could this amazing mushroom could play for us now, in a society so filled with anxiety and depression? For several generations now, so many of us “civilized folk” have been disconnected from the medicines of earth, having been misled by a societal system that would have us rather be dependent on synthetically produced pharmaceutical drugs, to treat the conditions that often stem from the sick society in which we are living.

I feel it is crucial to emphasize here that in this “psychedelic renaissance” we must be careful with the way we approach these medicines of the earth. To approach them with the same mindset that “I want to take this thing to fix me and make me feel better” and not embrace the self-responsibility that it actually requires “to feel better” is actually disrespectful and devaluing of the self and the medicine. As a newly trained addiction recovery and integration coach, I am passionate about empowering people to be a conscious co-creator of their reality- to find ways of cultivating more connection in their life to self and nature, through ritual and embodiment practices. The precious medicines of earth can most certainly help us in our healing, but it is through our intentional efforts that we actually earn the peace and healing that we seek. We may be “creatures of habit,” but we are also courageous creatures with great potential to change!  

 Now, back to Amanita muscaria. In the last few years, it’s as if a veil has been lifted from our perceptual lens of this mushroom- more and more scientific studies are emerging about the active chemicals in this mushroom that can aid in anxiety and depression among other things. And there’s also the interesting folklore that has become more commonly known, even in our narratives around religious traditions, such as Christmas, and the relationship of the reindeer and jolly ol’ Santa Claus! There are numerous books and articles that can be found at our fingertips through the internet (which I will source at the end of this paper.) And there are online forums about it- On Telegram, YouTube, and I just discovered Reddit, and I’m sure there are many more. How far down the rabbit hole you want to go , is up to you!   Even though we have been told for generations to fear this powerful and beautiful mushroom, the time has come for the truth to be revealed.

A more Personal Introduction….

Before I delve into my own story of how my life was so positively influenced by this mushroom, the “good biology student and teacher” in me desires to share about this mushroom’s bio-chemistry, ecology and ethno-pharmacology, so as to give a well rounded understanding to a person not knowing much about this mushroom. (Disclaimer: This is in no way a “scholarly essay” or research paper as I will not be properly using citations. I’m no longer in college after all, I am in the school of life. However, I will provide sources when I directly quote or use specific information and I will provide a list of resources at the end of this paper.)  

My educational background is in the Natural Sciences, having received a Bachelors of Arts from University of Hawaii at Hilo in Natural Science with a minor in Biology. Mycology was one of the fields of study that fascinated and inspired me in such a deep way- beyond my logical and analytical mind. There was something mystical to me about mushrooms. When I found out at age thirteen that there were mushrooms out there that could open up other dimensions of reality, I thought to myself “Where can I find them!?” (It didn’t take me long to.)  

I am an avid “mycophile” (lover of mushrooms) and I study mushrooms with a passion- I love trying to identify mushrooms and I derive great joy looking for mushrooms in the forests. I have also developed what I can only describe as a psychic connection with mushrooms, in the way that I actually have felt “guided” by them, to places where I can find them. I have woken up in the morning with the Amanita muscaria whispering into my consciousness “Come find me, I’m here….” As I will expand more upon later, the deepening of my relationship with A. muscaria began when I was really needing support and anxiety had begun to really diminish my quality of life. Thats when I went into the forest to find the mushrooms. It make me think of the quote of the Sufi poet Rumi: “What you seek is seeking you.”

About the Fungi

I remember learning in my mycology course how mushrooms are merely the “fruiting body” of a species of fungi- a body that mostly lives under the ground’s surface, as mycelium- which are a network of fungal threads called hyphae. By sensing the optimal conditions, the mycelium will then begin the formation of the mushroom, which will emerge from the ground (except truffle, which stay underground!) containing the spores, to then be dispersed into the environment. Fungi play such an important role in our ecosystems as they are “decomposers.” In the great circle of Life, we cannot leave out Death, because all that dies shall break down in composition, to become nourishment for more life! Yet, there are some fungi that have evolved away from their decomposing abilities and have come to depend on their symbiosis with trees, such as the Amanita genus.

Amanita muscaria has a symbiotic relationship with as many as 20 different tree species, including pine, oak, spruce, fir, birch, and cedar.

This means that the mycelium of this fungi grows along the roots of the tree, making mineral nutrients and water more available to the tree, while the fungi uptakes sugars from the roots of the tree. This relationship is known as a “mycorrhizal network.”  

The genus Amanita contains at least 400 species, a couple of which are the most known deadly mushrooms in the world, and some species of which are considered the most delicious to eat. A really unique signature of the Amanita’s morphology is the way it grows and emerges- from an egg-like sac called a “volva.” As the mushroom emerges, pieces of the volva can stick to the cap of the mushroom, like warts, as seen so clearly in the cap A.muscaria.

The Misunderstanding of this Mushroom

Amanita muscaria has been deemed “toxic” and “poisonous” and even “deadly” - all titles which are misleading and also simply not true. There are various reasons for the spread of this misinformation. Here, I will highlight on some scientific facts:

Because the Amanita genus contains some of the most poisonous mushrooms in the world, and people are afraid of being poisoned, this mushroom got lumped in with the “deadly’s.” What makes the deadly amanitas deadly is that they contain “amatoxins” and “phallotoxins.” Amatoxins are also found in two other genera of mushroom (Galerina and Lepidiota). To clarify here, Amanita muscaria does NOT contain either of these chemicals.

Because this is a powerful mushroom with potentially psychoactive effects, fear and curiosity can arise in many people. The fearful will likely stay away from it, and even stomp on the mushrooms when they see them (and that just hurts my heart!).  And even for the curious who venture to ingest this mushroom just for the sake of wanting to know what it will do to them, may end up having a very unpleasant experience, or they may have a profoundly enjoyable experience, OR they may have no experience at all! As I will discuss later on, relationship and intention are important when deciding to ingest psychoactive mushrooms and/or plants.

Because people have reported feeling sick and vomiting from ingesting this mushroom, it has been deemed “toxic.” There may have even been a death from a person who choked on their own vomit from having ingested this mushroom - but even in that case,  the mushroom itself was not the real culprit. Now, let’s get deeper into the chemistry….

ACTIVE INGREDIENTS & BIOCHEMISTRY

The active ingredients of Amanita muscaria, are Ibotenic Acid and Muscimol. Muscimol is derived from ibotenic acid by decarboxylation. Ibotenic acid is an analogue of the neurotransmitter glutamate. Glutamate is one of the most abundant amino acids in the body. It  also serves as a metabolic precursor to the neurotransmitter GABA (gamma-Aminobutyric acid) According to one scientific study, people who suffer from depression may have had lower levels of GABA present in the brain. According to another 2019 study, GABA has anti-microbial, anti-seizure, and antioxidant properties and may help treat and prevent conditions such as diabetes, high blood pressure and insomnia. (source:https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/326847#medical-benefits) I mention this because, muscimol binds to the same site on the GABAA receptor complex as GABA itself, as opposed to other GABAergic drugs such as barbiturates and benzodiazepines which bind to separate regulatory sites. (source:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muscimol).

Re-stated: Muscimol mimics the chemical GABA, which is a neurotransmitter responsible for calming the mind and easing anxiety, among other benefits.

So, could this mushroom be like “nature’s benzodiazepine,” yet safer because our bodies will not become chemically dependent? I feel it is not as straight forward as this and I would never want to diminish this mushroom by comparing it with a pharmeceutical. Also I feel it is more mysterious, requiring respect and even reverence, to the approach of “using”- or how I would rather refer to it as “working with” - this powerful and potentially healing mushroom. (more on that topic in the later section on “Cultivating Relationship”) There are other species of Amanita that contain these chemicals of importance (and in higher amounts) as well, which look similar to A. muscaria and those species are: A. pantherina (known as the “panther cap” or “false blusher”) and A. regalis (known as the “Royal Fly Agaric”)  

IBOTENIC ACID

“Ibotenic acid is an unstable compound; consequently, during extraction and subsequent processing large losses can occur. Also, in dried mushrooms the ibotenic acid content decreases gradually.” (https://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/data-and-analysis/bulletin/bulletin_1970-01-01_4_page005.html). This compound, when “decarboxylated” (heated to a specific temperature) becomes muscimol. According to studies, it has been shown that the highest percentage of this compound is found in the top yellow layer of the mushroom cap, just below the thin top colored skin. The concentrations of ibotenic acid are higher in the fresh mushroom, and when consumed (in the mushroom’s more raw state) can have potent effects that are responsible for the more “unpleasant” effects : nausea, vomiting and/or gastro-intestinal upset. And yet, it should be noted that there can also be very pleasant psychoactive effects as well- euphoria, and various other sensory altering effects.

MUSCIMOL

“Muscimol can be found in all Amanita species in which ibotenic acid occurs. However, since it is easily derived from ibotenic acid through the loss of water and CO2, which can occur during extraction or on paper chromatograms, one cannot say positively that it is a genuine compound in the mushroom.” (https://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/data-and-analysis/bulletin/bulletin_1970-01-01_4_page005.html). And so, interestingly, it may be that this compound is only found in the mushroom because it was created/converted from the ibotenic acid.

I have witnessed a certain level of “judgement” of ibotenic acid,  being unfavorable to ingest and that the goal before ingesting is to convert as much of it as possible to muscimol, however, it has been argued that ibotenic acid plays an important role in the benefits of ingesting this mushroom- and that you can never really convert ALL the ibotenic acid anyways.

From what information I have gathered is that “ibotenic acid” has gotten a bad reputation and is considered by many to be unfavorable- which is why people take extra steps to decarboxylate the mushrooms so as to convert the ibotenic acid to muscimol.  One of the possible reasons for the “bad rap” is that it has actually been referred to scientifically as a “neurotoxin” but this was  because of a particular study’s outcome: it was found to cause brain legions when injected directly into the heads of rats.  When we ingest this mushroom, it obviously would not have the same effect as being injected into our brains, and so therefore, the title of “neurotoxin” is not accurate and is misleading.

Cultivating Right Relationship

As I shared a little bit earlier, prior to cultivating my deep relationship with A. muscaria I been struggling with anxiety, an over active mind and very debilitating control patterns that developed over the past couple years (due to personal and relational circumstances). I believe in the healing power of plant medicines and that they are amazing tools that can help us in our healing, and to interrupt addictions and our "normal" patterning (which is often times dis-functional!). However, we as individuals play the most important role in our healing- I truly believe the power is in our hands to become the “CEO’s of our own Health and Wellbeing,” as a nutrition coach mentor of mine says. It is our responsibility to put in our efforts to INTEGRATE the insights and new mind states we gain from plant medicines into our lives- so that we don't just become dependent upon another “substance” to shift our undesirable feeling state. We do this with courageous acts, by making the needed life changes to decrease stress and to nourish the conditions for our wellness and by cultivating nervous system regulating practices such as EFT/tapping, breath work, and so many others.  

I do not believe that any medicine or substance outside of ourselves can be a  "magic bullet" or "cure- all.” I believe it is crucial to be in "right relationship" with all medicines. That all being said- I greatly appreciate and value the plant medicine world and am vary cautious of the pharmaceuticals prescribed by doctors which do NOT heal, but only treat the symptoms, and often cause more ill side effects and dangerous chemical dependencies. It is important to remember, “Big Pharma” profits from our un-wellness.

Working with A. muscaria

There are many ways one can work with A. muscaria. I will describe a way that I feel cultivates a relationship with this mushroom that is respectful and reverent of the mushroom, which may potentiate its healing benefits.

One can begin by working with it on the energetic and psychic level. I was guided by my curiosity and intuition to work with this mushroom, and have felt a joyous connection with this mushroom since I first saw it out in the forest. The elated feeling I would get from the mushroom actually was the indicator to me that I needed to learn more about it and so, my studies began.

It is important to do your own research- don’t just take my word for granted. I started finding and reading lots of articles, watching videos and I took a workshop from the Fungi Academy, featuring a woman who goes by the name “Amanita Dreamer.” I started to feel more and more confident that ingesting A. muscaria was not dangerous but could actually be in divine alignment for me. I started to align with certain people out there who’s perspective and knowledge of A.muscaria I found very helpful. (See resources at end.)

After the first big Autumn seasonal rains soaked the earth up where I live in northern California, I remember the day that I woke up and I just knew they were out there in the forest. I actually felt their presence in my psychic field. It had happened the season prior also, and so, my energetic connection had been developing for at least a couple of years before I felt it was time to actually harvest them.

Before harvesting I had already learned that the active ingredients are in the caps and the potency is most prime when the mushroom is relatively “young,” before the cap has fully flattened out.  I would always leave the older mushrooms so that their spores could be released into the environment. When harvesting, I did so with reverence and gratitude.

When I brought the mushroom caps home, I dehydrated them at about 130 degrees until “cracker dry” as Amanita Dreamer refers to it. I then scraped the gills out from the cap, since the gills don’t contain the desired active ingredients. Note: Its easier and less of a mess to scrape them out once dried. I saved this scraped out contents into a jar to then release back to re-spore the forest.  The scraped out caps went into another jar. I kept these dried caps in jars on my altar and connected with them energetically until the day came when I knew it was time.

Potency varies from mushroom to mushroom and so when it comes to ingesting them, the most reliable way to get a consistent dosage is to ingest either the powder of the ground up mushroom caps (via tea or capsule) or from a tincture. I personally wanted to work with the caps whole so that I could see them with their beautiful color and not grind them up. I did indeed notice how one gram of dried mushroom caps varied from day to day, while micro-dosing. I actually enjoyed that mysterious aspect. For example, one morning a noticed much more of an effect, to where I actually needed to lay down- and it was a very healing and learning experience for me in slowing down and receiving.  I also have tried breaking off pieces from multiple different caps to get a more average range of potency and weighing out my desired dosage that way.

Because I resonated with it, I decided to follow the guidance of Adam, a fellow A. muscaria advocate and magical herbal alchemist who runs balticalchemy.com. I started with 1gram in the morning and 1g at night, making a tea. I break apart caps onto a small scale to weigh out and then steep the mushroom pieces in my tea for up to 10 minutes. I then have a ritual of sitting down at my altar and speaking my words of gratitude to the mushroom tea and my intentions while they steep.

Making a respectful and reverent "daily practice” or ritual with this mushroom, and any plant or mushroom medicine, is very important to me and is an important, integrative part of any "microdosing protocol." This is where and how we RE-PATTERN and RE-PROGRAM ourselves. And this is how we also cultivate right relationship with our medicine.

I drink down the tea, with heart open in gratitude for the opportunity to commune with this mushroom. I also eat the mushroom pieces within it the tea.  I actually like to speak directly to the spirit of the mushroom, my gratitude and my prayers. I like to also do some EFT(Emotional Freedom Technique)/"tapping" and bodily stretching/movement and then I go about my day.

I usually feel the effects within the hour. Sometimes I feel a warmth in my heart space, or a warmth of peace and/or bliss sweeping through my body. There are many other subtle effects I have noticed and I feel it is important to keep certain things sacred and inside as it is my own mysterious journry I am on, which will be unlike any one else’s.

So far, My only experience in consuming a larger amount was in an Amanita muscaria ceremony which I attended and my experience was pleasant. Not only did we consume a strong tea of it but we also smoked it! That was rather harsh and I did not particularly like that but smoking of the top layer of the mushroom cap definitely does have an affect which can be described as childlike elation. I did notice my sense of taste become much more vivid and my perception became slightly warped. I definitely had a lot of energy which continued into the next day where I noticed how I was “talking a mile a minute” 😆

 Read more below about my own experience with micro-dosing ....

My Micro-dosing Testimonial

I noticed the positive benefits in only a few days- My anxiety, fight/flight sensations, worrying mind/thoughts- were simply GONE. My whole reality shifted just from being able to feel CALM again in mind and body. I realized how much a dis-regulated nervous system ("anxiety") was negatively impacting my perception of reality. A.muscaria also helped me to re-configure my long time habitual relationship with cannabis. I made the decision to completely stop smoking cannabis the day I began working with A.muscaria, which has also contributed greatly to my increased energy and clarity of mind.

Before this tremendous positive shift from A.muscaria, I could barely sit still. My outlook on life was very despairing and filled with self-doubt.   I have rapidly regained a positive outlook, more motivation and self-confidence and more focus. I have also been getting more sustained sleep through the night. I have felt more light hearted elation, and peace than I have experienced in the past couple of years.  

In summary, this beautiful mushroom has played a pivotal role in assisting me to get my nervous system back into a regulated place, after suffering the repercussions of being in “fight or flight” mode for an extended amount of time.don’t necessarily and I consider it to be such a powerful catalyst for me in my healing and coming into clarity and alignment with my truth. 

Amanita muscaria has become my most beloved ally from the forest, showing me that I too have so much to offer to this world once I stand in my power, with my innate wisdom, mystery, beauty, truth and love.

Resources- (I encourage you to do your own research!)

Websites:

1. www.amanitadreamer.net

2. www.reindeeramanita.com

3.  https://fungiacademy.com/

4. http://www.amanitaceae.org/

5. https://jgi.doe.gov/retracing-roots-fungal-symbioses/

6. https://www.technologynetworks.com/neuroscience/blog/harnessing-the-therapeutic-potential-of-muscimol-349541

7. https://www.mushroomstone.com/

8. https://themushroomcap.com/product/the-fungal-pharmacy/

9. https://www.ancientpages.com/2016/09/14/mysterious-ancient-mushrooms-in-myths-and-legends-sacred-feared-and-worshiped-among-ancient-civilizations-2/

10. https://www.balticalchemy.com/

11. https://harmonyacresfarms.org/

Books:

Fly Agaric: A Compendium of History, Pharmacology, Mythology, & Exploration,

by Kevin M. Feeney

The Fungal Pharmacy by Robert Rogers

Come....come to me sister, daughter, beloved child....

Do you not see the light within you?

Have you gone numb to your own fiery passions inside of you?

Come flow with me....bring your love and humility and dance with me.

For, my fire brings new life....

It burns away the old stagnant energy.

It creates the space to create.

Dance with me and feel in your blood your fiery passion to create!

THIS is your birthright, your soul's purpose and your highest joy.

First of all, WHAT IS IBOGA? This amazing and powerful plant is becoming more and more known to the western world due to its awesome capacity to act upon our neurotransmitters and help with substance addiction issues. 

I was “called” and also invited to work with this sacred plant medicine because a dear beloved of mine had been struggling with addiction with various substances (which at the root of this was issues of self worth) and so when committed to attend this Iboga ceremonial retreat in Costa Rica he extended the invitation to me and I said Yes. 

The below passages were written by the wonderful Elizabeth Bast who I had the pleasure of meeting and receiving guidance from on the SOUL CENTRO Bwiti initiated retreat team, with regards to navigating and working with this plant medicine...

​“Iboga is an entheogenic (psychedelic) plant medicine held sacred by the indigenous people of Central West Africa. The medicine is found in an inner layer of root bark from the Tabernanthe iboga plant as well a broader group of perennial shrubs belonging to the Apocynaceae family, found in the tropical forests of Gabon, Cameroon, and the Republic of Congo. The ceremonial and reverent use of the Iboga root is integral to the Bwiti tradition for spiritual initiation, spiritual and physical healing, shamanic diagnosis and prescription, community celebration ceremonies, self-study, prayerful microdosing, direct communication with nature spirits, fertility and aphrodisiac purposes, an endurance and vision aid during long hunts (in light doses), spiritual travel through space and time, and communion with ancestors as well as the healing of ancestral lines. Iboga is considered to be a sentient spirit and master teacher, not a mere substance to consume. Knowledge of iboga was first held by the Babongo people, otherwise known as the Pygmies, who then passed on the practice to sects within the Bwiti tradition. As the 2nd oldest genetic line in the world, the Babongo people may have worked with iboga since ancient times. Like Ayahuasca, San Pedro (Huachuma), Peyote, and Psilocybin mushrooms, it is a sacred visionary plant medicine, yet iboga is an utterly unique spirit. More recently, iboga and its active alkaloid ibogaine have been proven to have powerful addiction breaking effects in medical studies and observational research. Some people have referred to iboga as the "Mt. Everest" of psychedelic medicines. Iboga can be a rigorous physical, mental, and spiritual journey—and yet there is always a profound and loving intelligence at play through the challenging moments. At times, journeys may also be playful or bizarre. Initial "flood" doses or high ceremonial doses can be accompanied by intense purging/vomiting and other cleansing reactions, temperature changes, trembling muscles and limbs (ataxia), and general physical discomfort. The journey can last up to 24 to 48 hours—with 12 hours being the most intense psychedelic phase. Visions may or may not be a part of the journey, depending on the needs of the individual. One may experience answers to our deepest questions, insights, guidance, soul healing, realizations of one's divine nature, shadow work, facing fears, releasing attachments, premonitions and warnings, and visitations from ancestors or loved ones who have passed on. In initial journeys, one may experience the "mind purge" in which all the contents of the psyche, both lived and imagined, arise in a rapid storm. The intelligent purpose of the mind purge is to truly "look into the basement" of our consciousness to be pristinely aware of what is there—and then to make new space for what one is calling in.”

For more tremendous resources and to learn more, Visit her website HERE

I never could have imagined that I would have the profound privilege and opportunity to commune with this powerful plant medicine Iboga, but life unfolded in its mysterious way to open this path to me. 

Iboga and Ibogaine (one of the 13 alkaloids of the Iboga root) have become more known in the Western world over the last 10 years for its miraculous ability to help heal addiction by helping a person get to the root of their traumas and underlying reasons for their addiction. However, this medicine is not just necessarily for people with addiction problems  (although I do think that most people have addiction problems!)- It is over all a very healing plant that is used to detoxify the mind and body. At the psycho-spiritual level, this medicine is the ultimate “truth seeker”- it helps you to see and know all the thought-forms that get in the way of being aligned with the Truth of your soul. 

Communing with Iboga was definitely not a “fun” experience- it was actually one of the most uncomfortable and challenging experiences of my life. I already have a pretty “overactive” mind so I definitely was curious (and a little nervous) of what my experience would be like. I remember when I was “in the thick of it” thinking “I don’t ever want to do this again.”   I will attempt to describe my experience from the beginning:

The ceremony begins around the fire pit around 8 pm. A water buffalo horn is blown in the four directions and the fire is lit. One of the facilitators goes around the circle with a torch or aromatic resin and herbs to cleanse each participant. The medicine is given one by one- We state our full name and then are fed a spoonful of the rootbark which we then wash down with water. And then the “fire talk” begins. Various “truth topics” are brought up for discussion. Sometimes there would be a posed question and we would go around the the circle and we would all get a chance to speak and share our perspective. “What do you know about love”....”How do you know the truth?”.....”What obstacles get in the way of being present?” The medicine begins to take effect in 30-60 minutes. Before closing the fire talk, each person is to look into a mirror that is held in front of their face and answer: “Who are you?” “Who do you love?” “Why do you love yourself?” When that is complete we are led back to our mats, and by then I was feeling the medicine. It is emphasized to “take it slow” as quick and sudden movements can bring on nausea and dizziness. 

There is traditional Bwiti ceremonial music being played over the speakers. I layed down on my mat and put an eye mask on. With eyes covered the medicine is experienced much more and the inner journey can begin.  Each person is given more medicine- specifically measured for the person- this time in the form of a capsule containing the “Total alkaloid” extract of the root bark- so one capsule can be up to 7 spoonfuls of root bark. The first ceremony I received one capsule and the second ceremony I received two (everyone got more medicine on the second night). Then the journey begins to deepen. 

The music has quite the synergistic effect with the medicine and I would say plays a big role in the journey. One of the main instruments heard in the music is the the mougongo, which is mouth harp made of carved bent wood with a string that is played with a small stick. While the mouth changes the sound that is produced changes in tone. The other instruments that are heard are the shakers. With the eye mask on the auditory senses are very heightened and visions come easy. The music that is very repetitive and chaotic in rhythm (many times having at least four different rhythms going on) plays a powerful role on the brainwaves, putting you in a trance like state. The facilitators also used shakers along with the recorded music and it felt like we were being washed with sound as they shook the shakers all around our bodies. The facilitators actually call this sound effect “the chisler”- because if feels like its chiseling you. My body began to shake and tremble, I could feel it acting on my nervous system- which was one of my intentions- to heal my nervous system.  In my inner visions I could see the musicians playing this music, I could see their faces in detail. My body felt waves of heat burning through it.

At some point one of the facilitators came to me and anointed my third eye with “pygmy paste” which is a special recipe only known to the older women of the Bwiti. And then began the “Soul Journey”- for which I had prepared a set of succinct personal questions. A facilitator guides this journey for an individual if they feel like the person is ready and able and they utilize the questions within the journey so that the individual can derive truthful answers from the clearest part of themselves.

 Everyone’s journey and experience with the medicine is different, just as everyone’s soul is a unique expression. Some great advice I received before coming into this work was “release your expectations.”  For instance, not everyone has really vivid- “clear as day”- visions. I did not, actually. They were more like impressions and glimpses of images and at first I wondered “am I just imagining this?” and I found myself not trusting in what I was really seeing- but then I realized that this is actually a pattern of mine- of self doubt and the tendency of comparing myself to others. Sometimes this self judgement can sound like “I can’t even do THIS (the medicine) right!”  which is a thought that is not helpful or kind. Instead, what is needed is more TRUST in and COMPASSION for one’s Self.  

I won’t go into too many details of my journey’s because of the personal content. First, I was guided to “find my soul” which may be, say, in your room of your house for example.   I went through a conversational process with my soul with the questions I had come up with and then ultimately I merged back with my soul, which I had unconsciously “pushed aside” from various traumas in my life.  This may hve been the the most meaningful insight I got from my soul journeys- was that I had abandoned my own soul- “pushed her out” from her rightful place for the over-caring and over-consideration of others- which in turn left me feeling out of touch with my own needs and desires.  And then I was guided to fly to Grandmother Moon, where I met up with either an ancestor or someone dear to me that has passed on. On the first night the person who I met with was my dear sister Natalia who passed away several years ago. She gave me clear insights into self love and self care and being true to myself.   In the second journey I met up with my grandma who affirmed my soul’s purpose- to share music from my soul (not for my soul).  Then you fly to the brightest star that you can see in the universe and touch it to receive its light to illuminate my life’s body, mind and spirit!  In the first soul journey I was guided into my brain/mind as well as my heart to “clean out” these spaces. My “cleaning techniques” just came to me, as clear insights. Basically, it was a practice in trusting the first “truth impressions” that would come to me.   

 There were many more parts to these soul journeys and since they were very much reflections of my own life’s experiences and psyche I will not share them here, but instead will be creating artwork to integrate the insights I gained from my inner visions. At the very end of this, I will share some images I recently created (scroll down).

Iboga medicine lasts a very long time. Hours and hours....until morning and beyond. (The spirit of Iboga can actually stay with you for months- that is if you respect and honor it. I was told that drinking alcohol or communing with other powerful plant teachers is a sure way to “get Iboga to leave.”) At its most intense, I experienced a torrent of thoughts, one after the other, for hours- which is impossible to describe through words. Its termed a “mind purge”- it can be thoughts of moments of your life, it could be one thought that leads to the next- a fascinating study of the mind for sure! One may also experience physical purging- which I certainly did! I’m no rookie with purging, as I have been working with Ayahuasca for about 20 years, however purging on Iboga is another story! Purging root bark is much harder!  But back to the “mind purge” which was far more fascinating- The only way I could tolerate this intense hurricane of thoughts was to keep my center, practice non-attachment and to come back to the present moment, through my breath, through feeling the sensations of my body. I actually was able to find techniques in real time to shift and let go of my thoughts.  It all had to do with the attention I would give it.  And if a thought wasn’t based on truth, it would evaporate and disappear- because it was never really real! This is  a very valuable insight to have: that Only the Present experience is actually Real and True! 

A very precious insight I was given was a perspective of myself like I have never had before. I was able to SEE myself from outside of myself, as if I was looking at myself from someone else’s perspective. With this perception I was able to know the truth in we should never judge another person and we should also especially never judge ourselves. I got to see myself as a beautiful, sensitive, deeply feeling human being and I felt much love for myself in this perception. As I write this my heart swells with emotion. We are so hard on ourselves and most of the time we are judging ourselves unconsciously. These unconscious patterns must be brought to our awareness before we can even address them. And for this awareness I am profoundly grateful for plant medicines because they hold the potential to open our minds, widen our perceptions and help us be free from our rigid mental patterns we have come to believe to be “truth” and they can help us see the real Truth.

In this “mind purge experience, the underlying limiting beliefs and “self talk” that one wouldn’t want to admit to anyone gets put on the mind’s loudspeakers! When this would come up for me I would remember to give myself love and compassion. Fears, self judgement, criticism, and the like, can sound like many things...In fact it is quite common for people to have auditory hallucinations when working with Iboga.  For example, there was a person in the group that was absolutely convinced that I was yelling at him to shut up and all sorts of other terrible things! (Because in his head he was looping out loud my name and also in his head I was responding very harshly!) To him it sounded clear as day, but amazingly, it was all within his mind!  What we are actually “hearing” much of the time in our inner mental space are reflections of our own fundamental core beliefs, perceptions of self and conditioning. And if these core beliefs have been formed from harmful/traumatic events in our life they are going to manifest in ways that only serve to keep us stuck in that pattern- until we recognize it for what it is and “do the work” to re-pattern (which can look different for everyone!). 

What I found was that the only remedy for our true healing and empowerment is LOVE and AWARENESS.  It was very clear how our tendency to be stuck in the past or worried about the future keeps us from truly living!  Mental Illness is definitely a result of this tendency- and I got very clear insights from the medicine how most of us in the modern western world are, to some extent, on this spectrum of mental illness- in the way that we loop self destructive thoughts and are rarely present.  

The following day, the medicine is still very much at work, although the most intense part is over. I experienced the most clarity and profound peace of mind. My body felt amazing, purified and strengthened. However, the following day after that, my mind started to “creep back in” and with it all the feelings and thought/emotion loops. I realized, with humility, that Iboga is NOT here to “do the work for us.” It is here to SHOW us how we need to take our power back by loving and valuing ourselves enough to do the work that is required. It is a medicine for our mind and shows us how every thought has power.

 Iboga showed me the truth that I can never un-see. It showed me the good work I need to do- and primarily that work is LOVING MYSELF, TAKING TIME FOR MYSELF, and TRUSTING MYSELF.

This might look like practicing acceptance to release my tendency to control. It might look like getting more sleep, allowing myself to rest more. Drinking more water. Practicing mindfulness. Taking quiet time to myself and letting go of feelings of guilt and harsh thoughts that “I’m not doing enough”. More BEING, instead of DOING- and/or more BEING while I am DOING- practicing the art of being Present at all times, even when actively doing.  

Caring enough about myself enough to not care what other people think. Staying present to life, to my needs and desires-

  Cultivating the daily practices and techniques that will help me stay present and aligned with my soul’s purpose.  

MAHALO NUI LOA, So much Gratitude to the SOUL CENTRO team! I LOVE YOU. BASSE!

Below are some images I created to help me remember and integrate my visionary experiences. 

Below is an image of a heart, with water flowing through and over it and it transforming into a flower. 

Below is Natalia, who I met on the moon during my first soul journey and received her clear oracle on self-love and taking time for myself.

Below is an image of myself, merging with Pele, Goddess of the Volcano, when I received her guidance to connect with and create from my Soul’s Passion. 

“For the Bwiti, there is no guru. No ‘big guy,’ that is prayed to or worshipped. There is only one prayer that the Bwiti use. Every morning, they thank the Creator for another day. It is a gratitude for life itself, for the gift of simply being alive.

“Life is a gift, and nothing goes above it.” – Wisdom from a Bwiti Shaman

The Bwiti know that, from day one, the creator gave us everything we need. This truth exists deep inside of us. We do not have to ‘pay’ to be alive. We simply are.

The value of one’s life is held in the Bwiti’s highest regard. They treat themselves with care, and possess honor, courage and commitment for their life.  They deeply understand that we enter this world alone and we will leave alone, so nothing outside of themselves drives their internal happiness.

They recognize that they are a part of nature, and they do not abuse it. Nature is here for us to learn and grow from, to use for resources without abusing them. If nature is abused, we are essentially abusing ourselves on emotional, physical, psychological and spiritual levels. Conversely; by abusing themselves they are abusing nature.

They teach that life has always, and will always, begin inside of us. Nothing outside of ourselves will make us happy long-term. We must harness and nurture our truth to be happy within and to bring peace to the mind.”

Hello 2021⚡️Flashback to 1989 (I was 9) I was in a play called “Earth Child” (which was created by the Santa Cruz Peace Child choir). In the play there was a scene where it was a future projection into the year 2021, on “Earth Day,” and we were recounting the perilous times we had passed through, having come into the awareness that we had to change our ways of living to more sustainable, harmonious ways of living with the Earth, for the reality of future generations. 🌏2021 is here. If 2020 wasn’t a call for healing & examination of our fundamental values, what’s it gonna take?! From a scientific standpoint when organisms in a system become out of balance they become more susceptible to disease 🦠 , viruses & bacteria. Look at the problems that go along with monocrop agriculture for examples. And so conspiracy theories aside- humanity most certainly is living out of balance within the system of Gaia- and we are witness to the many ailments that come as a result- physically, emotionally and psychologically. Some say that people will only change when they are forced to- by some crisis or catastrophic circumstances- but I disagree. What makes us humans unique in this web of life is our capacity of awareness. How we direct our awareness is the key for what actions we make in life. Our awareness gives us our ability to perceive, to know, to experience and to CHOOSE. Yet, We have these fascinating ego constructs & without the necessary, cultivated awareness our ego can keep us trapped in perceptions that don’t serve us- & at worst are downright self destructive. We are all the witness & participant to this everyday. So, If we are not just our life story, our fleeting feelings; if we we are not just our accomplishments, our failures, our occupations, our incomes or our formal titles- what & who are we? It’s plain to see all around us every day what happens when we don’t cultivate a wider awareness of our fundamental existence, & ponder these sorts of questions- we may become entranced in the dysfunctional societal programs that don’t actually foster this awareness to begin with that are based on materialism & all the schisms that go along with it. 

And we forget our eternal being-ness that is present underneath it all. And the more we adhere to our beliefs, our stories and patterns of thinking and feeling, and identify only with the roles we play, we might end up feeling like “whats the point of it all? I still feel empty, disappointed, and disconnected.” And no matter how much we try to distract or numb ourselves from these feelings, they won’t go away. They actually will intensify. And so yes, this is when sometimes a person will get brought to their knees in a personal crisis, a “dark night” of the soul, with the desperate plea or earnest prayer for purpose and meaning of their life. Our awakening can be a painful process that many choose to try to avoid- but it is necessary because it’s going to take a much wider perspective than our ego structures to get us out of the mess we’ve created for ourselves. We are all in this together- no matter how much we attempt to deny it with our “us and them” mentality. Awakening to the fundamental reality of unity- is the journey we are all on. So here’s to the journey! Here’s to the ceremony of life! Here’s to the healing of humanity, which begins with healing the disconnection within ourselves. To become a master of any craft it takes practice, practice, practice. And so here’s to the practice of being more aware of our true selves, of our unity, of our innate and infinite power to love and to create. Who are you and who do you want to be?

Aloha family. It’s an honor to be in this ceremony of life with you. For many people right now the experience is like that point in Ceremony with Grandmother, when the Medicine is coming on so strong that our egos start to feel very threatened and we get scared thinking life as we know it is going to end. Now is the time to breathe deeply and let go of thinking we can control this. We just gotta Feel what we are feeling and let it move through. Perhaps its becoming crystal clear how the thoughts you are thinking and looping in your mind are influencing the experience of your reality? Now is the opportunity to Stay firm and clear in our prayer and Trust in the process of the divine play unfolding.... because in the end (when the ceremony has come to a close) we have gained insights and a humbling that will serve the unique evolution of our soul, beyond what we could have ever imagined. Keep breathing and hold your prayers and visions of healing clearly in your awareness and release them with gratitude to the source of all life- speak them or sing them, from your heart to the Heart of the One....to the dreamer of this dream. 💞🙌🏾 🙏🙏🙏. Any one else feeling this? 🌏🌍🌎

(above art by Ashley Foreman) 

*This post I originally shared on my Patreon Page.

I wish to share with you some inspiration that feels alive to me right now. The few days ago I went on a long walk through the moist and mossy old growth forest to an area of beach, that is truly magical. One of the magical aspects are these giant rocks on the beach that are covered with colorful lichens, beautiful blue succulents and tiny wild strawberry flowers. The experience out there was enhanced in its magic due to the fact that I had consumed some magical mushroom chocolate with my partner. When we finally got to the beach we gravitated towards this giant log to "post up" and I created our altar: made offerings to Creator, speaking my prayers, my gratitude and my praise. I used my tuning forks to clear our energy fields with the clear tones and a song came through which was like a soothing balm for the soul- that love is always Here and Now. Then I played my flute for a little while and had the insight while I was creating some lovely melodious sounds of how the flute is like a metaphor for our Life as humans- The way I saw it is that when you don't place your fingers just right over the holes and allow air to leak through you will not achieve the pure clear tones you desire to make. Just like in life, if we allow our energy to leak out in ways that do not serve we will not then have the energy to achieve what we wish to do; The way that we we carefully direct our attention and energy  will determine our ability to embody the dharma that our soul's desire to embody. 

Being a Human Being is an awesome blessing and responsibility (among many other things!). It is a blessing because  we have the ability to be AWARE of the power we come from and the power we possess. It is a responsibility because in being aware- we have the choice to use our power for good or for evil.  Dharma is a very meaningful word that is not simply defined. The origin of this word is Sanskrit- Dharma being "that which upholds or supports." It can be regarded as  "the ultimate and primordial fact of who and what we are." It can be regarded to as "What is"- the circumstances of your life AND dharma can also be the path with which you meet the phenomena of life- the eternal dharma, that is continually unfolding....

After this flute playing I walked a little ways closer to the ocean and sat in the sand and surrendered my thinking mind to just RECEIVE. With an open heart and open mind I had beautiful, meaningful experience that stirred deep emotion within me. I will attempt to put to words the feelings and insights I received and could later reflect upon. It was a deep felt sense of remembrance- of my deep connection to the living world. I felt a deep sorrow well up in me with the knowing of how many humans on the planet have become so disconnected. I began to cry with witnessing the divine comedy/tragedy: that humans are only searching for themselves- the true Self that is within! Yet they are lost in the illusion that they must seek for meaning and purpose outside of themselves.  I felt a deep sense of responsibility with this remembrance and my soul's desire to embody this truth, this knowing and to inspire others to their deeply connected and divine remembrance through the medium of Sound vibration. Song. Music. Mantra. And Words.......powerful intentional prayerful Words. With the massive shift we are witnessing right now globally it is crystal clear to myself and many others the importance of aligning with Dharma. What is it for that that upholds and supports your sense of Being? What is it that gives you a sense of meaningful connection to and purpose in life? With each of us being unique souls, we each have our unique individual dharma (sva-dharma) which guides how we meet and interact with our unique circumstances of life and how we are of service to the whole. Additionally, we are all a part of a  common sat-dharma,  which leads us to Self-Realization- our divine birthright!Okay, Okay....with all these concepts and words put aside, let me get back to the insights I had and how it possibly involves you. I got the crystal clear message that I am a messenger- that my dharma is to be a channel to Truth, and all that inspires and felt sense of Truth. I will be "stepping it up" as much as I am able to deliver these inspired messages- and a new evolution of my offering will be "podcasts."  These podcasts might include wisdom teachings from various traditions. They might include wellness practices. Additionally, I also wish to share more Mantra with you all because I feel like this is a valuable tool for this day and age. This age we are living in is commonly referred to as "the Information Age" and my goodness- all this information that is coming to us from all angles can be enough to drive someone insane! I often reflect on a research paper I wrote when I was in the University of Hawaii, at Hilo, in my undergraduate Natural Science Studies.  While taking a course called Evolutionary Biology, I wrote a paper on "Memetic Theory and social evolution."  This was years before the term "meme," which was coined by biologist Richard Dawkins in 1976, became commonly known. In this paper I explored "what makes certain bits of information (memes) have a high replication?" If you look at the information that becomes "viral" you will clearly see that the content pushes our "biological buttons"- and what we are witnessing lately is the FEAR button being pushed. FEAR and DEATH. I also explored how memes will begin "battling" in our minds for attention, to be replicated and that if we are not self-aware and vigilant of what is actually going on- that we have become these receptacles- so to speak- for information, whether it be true or not, we can become victim to these "viruses of the mind." Thoughts create emotions. Fearful thoughts create fear.  Just look at what is happening with this Virus pandemic: The fear and information that is running rampant about this virus is now causing people to discriminate against people of Asian descent! We are even seeing NURSES receiving discrimination, being seen as potential spreaders of the virus- the very people that are putting their lives on the line to be of service and be life advocates for people! And so these fearful memes are literally running people's lives making people act on the bits of information they are taking in- as if they have no choice! This is how un-aware people are. We are literally freaking ourselves out with what "could happen" and all our emotional reactions to the information and apparent circumstances.  Much of Humanity has assumed the mindless role of regurgitating information and relying on outside sources for the "truth." This is dangerous and allows the most fundamental aspects to our security to be corrupted: Our consciousness. Which is why the cultivation of consciousness may just be the most important thing we could actually be "doing"- which is sort of an oxy-moron, because in its essence it is non-doing.  The promulgating of fearful messages may just be the most insidious weapon against humanity- because when believed without discretion, it can render a person powerless. It is my prayer that I be a Messenger of Truth. Of inspiration. Of Gratitude. Of connection to creation and creator. Of all that may serve the healing and awakening of consciousness on this planet. Let us tend to our flames of truth within us and keep them burning bright in these times of illusion. Our lives are  a precious gift, made ever more precious by the reality of our impermanence. So while we have this breath of life breathing through us- may we be grateful.  Grateful for the Light of Truth that lives and shines through us. 

Celebrating one year of my album ELEMENTAL BEING today by releasing this new music video to the world!!! Filmed in many of the beautiful places which inspired this album....I am so humbled and grateful for the blessings and miracles of this life. 

I am choosing to participate in a global “coming out” movement called “Thank you Plant Medicine”(TYPM)- (from the website: This movement was born as a response to the stigma in society about the use of psychoactive plants and therapy-assisted psychedelics.We dream of a world where these substances are free from stigma and discrimination, for personal and collective healing.We are organizing a global wave of gratitude for February 20, 2020, calling on people to “come out” with their stories of healing and transformation on that day, using the hashtag #ThankYouPlantMedicine. www.thankyouplantmedicine.com

I would first like to preface by saying that the use of psychoactive/consciousness altering plants or fungi is NOT for everyone and by sharing my perspective I mean in no way to persuade or promote it. Okay? Okay. 

At the young and seemingly fearless age of fourteen I learned through reading some books and magazines about how a person could consume specific kinds of mushrooms and totally alter and explore their consciousness, and perhaps other dimensions of reality (this was before internet use was widespread). I was utterly fascinated and being the curious and hungry-for-the-meaning-of-life young teen that I was I decided to seek out these magical fungi. It didn’t take me long to find them, with the help of a more experienced person who knew how to find them in the cow pasture.....(Panaeolus cyanescens). I had only read about effects from various books and articles but I really was not prepared at all for what I was about to experience. After consuming who knows how many mushrooms (not very smart...) about 20 minutes later I began to feel my senses becoming highly elevated and intensified. The intensity only grew stronger and stronger, to the point of becoming totally overwhelming with surging feelings and emotions and then also altered perception to the point of only being able to see vibrant pulsating rainbow dripping rootlike formations filling my vision. I had no idea how to navigate this unknown realm of feeling and perception, yet I rode it out meeting the experience with utter awe. Then, I started to feel some background trepidation at how I was supposed to return home in such a state, with it being a school night and all...long story short I made it home safely with my tripper “boyfriend” at the time and he informed my parents what we had done, much to their dismay at seeing their daughter in such a state. I somehow floated up to my room where I spent the remainder of the experience laying in a bed that I felt I was continuously sinking into, watching the trees dance outside my window. I had deep insights that night into the personal truth of my being and regard the experience as a sort of “rite of passage” out of my childhood self. That was 25 years ago. Now in retrospect- had I known how the brain develops, I probably would not have done such a thing...I think there’s something to be said for the importance of having your brain fully developed before altering the brain chemistry ...yet I’m pretty sure I ended up alright and I can’t say I regret any of my use of mind altering substances (ok-except maybe a couple of times....lol). As I said before- I was a very curious soul, and it didn’t take me long to realize that the “Just Say No” propaganda campaign that I grew up with was more than just a war on drugs- it was a war on consciousness. How we got to this point of “mind control” is something to ponder.

My relationship with psychedelic plants/fungi has changed a lot over the years and I would say that the major shift happened about 19 years ago when I participated in my first plant medicine ceremony. Finally- I got a taste of what my soul has been thirsting for- Ceremony and experiencing the sacred and divine aspects of existence. Rewind-I lived most of my life in a community and area where Cannabis was freely and frequently used recreationally. I also began using cannabis in my teens- in a non-intentional way- not to say that I didn’t have meaningful experiences in that non-intentional context- However I have learned that intention, ritual and/or ceremony can greatly enhance the benefit in the communing with these “entheogens”- a term I like to use which translates literally as “becoming god within.” When I realized the extent as to which the society in  I lived tries to govern our lives- to the point of having laws that make NATURE ILLEGAL- I felt very passionate about RECLAIMING MY BASIC HUMAN RIGHT- to explore my consciousness. When I saw peaceful and kind people I knew facing jail time and/or having their houses taken away because of growing cannabis, it deeply disturbed me. And so my motivation in “coming out” comes from this place within, that believes that it is morally WRONG that plants and fungi that have awesome potential healing value are illegal. Anyone who does their studies of scientific research as well as historical/cultural studies will learn how much value the plant of Cannabis, for example, has for healing. The endo-cannabinoid system of the human body is proof that humans have evolved, in close relationship with this plant. And of course HEMP, which is the non-psychoactive cannabis species has a plethora of amazing uses which would greatly help our society and environment if it were more widely embraced and cultivated.

Thankfully “the times are a changin!’” More and more studies are being allowed and funded, the laws of the land are starting to change in many places and more and more people are beginning to learn about and honor the deep inherent value of these natural plant medicines. These are exciting times and yet we still have a long way to go! And it is my perspective that we need these plant medicines now more than ever so as to help with the healing of humanity on a spiritual level- to awaken us out of the materialist mindset trance of scarcity, unworthiness, fear and disconnection from nature. The fascinating scientific studies are showing us how the chemicals in these plants and fungi work on the brain, in beneficial ways to help people heal with ailments such as depression, PTSD and anxiety. The healing potential of these plants and fungi have been known for thousands of years to various indigenous cultures, who have kept such wisdom alive throughout the millennia through their initiated healer lineages. It is very important to honor the traditions and lineages from which the traditional ceremonial use of these plant medicines originate from because it is these people that have the deeply developed relationship with these plants and understand them in intimate ways which most western psyche’s do not and I dare say cannot (unless immersed in the studies and apprenticing with these traditional plant medicine healers.) And so while these are hopeful times with potential healing that these plant medicines present our deeply troubled and sick society, we must be mindful that our own egoistic tendencies don’t get the best of us.  I have been working with powerful plant medicines for over 20 years now and I am still most definitely a humble student on the path of healing...still learning the delicate process of surrender to the inexplicable healing powers of these plant teachers and the wisdom teachings and deeply meaningful insights they bestow.

Personally, most meaningful and valuable to my own life, of which I have received from my relationship with plant medicine teachers, namely Ayahuasca and Psilocybin mushrooms, has been my feeling of CONNECTION- Connection to Nature, to Spirit, to everything! In my expanded states I can see clearly how my thoughts and actions affect those around me and the whole. In working with these plants/fungi I naturally gravitated towards living a more healthier lifestyle- being careful of what I choose to consume physically or mentally.  Unhealthy habits steadily and easily fell away. A significant healing aspect of these plant medicines is how they have the capacity to disrupt our conditioned thought patterning- which is a very good thing because much of our behavior and thought processes are governed by our habitual patterning- which keeps us very limited in our perception and what we are capable of experiencing. This can lead in turn to depression, addiction, frustration, and other mental and physical ailments. As we are learning with the exciting field of neuroscience, our thoughts, emotions and perceptions are closely linked and work in a cyclical way. This leads me to honor the ways that these plants have helped me to develop my visionary abilities. One of the most powerful visionary perceptions I have had to date through Grandmother medicine was the experience of perceiving the ALL, underlying state of UNITY- it was an ineffable experience- impossible to put into words- but made a very deep impression on my life and perception of reality. I felt completely liberated from all fear and filled with AWE, totally absorbed in the interconnected matrix of all creation. One more thing. Being a singer and musician- it has been a profound gift and one of my greatest joys to sing my prayers and songs while in communion with plant medicine, in ceremony. I am so deeply grateful for all the plant teachers in my life- they are so dear to my heart and my relationship with each continues to evolve in mysterious and miraculous ways. Deep bows of reverence and respect.

 One of the main ways I have integrated the visions and insights that I have received from these plants/fungi is through music. I have always been a musical person, since before I could even talk I was already singing. In my life today, Music is a central aspect and purpose of my incarnation. I feel inspired to add here that the wisdom of the Yogic path has also played an equally important role in my evolution- I was introduced to the path of Yoga also at 14, which has helped me immensely on my journey with its ancient and very relevant wisdom teachings of self realization.  I have also always had an interest in the healing plants and started studying herbal healing in depth in my late teens. I have many healing plant allies that I work with on a daily basis. 

 Above photo with a Chacruna plant, the pair to the Ayahuasca vine, which contains DMT- the potent visionary molecule, belonging to the “Tryptamines,” indolealkylamine molecules, which evoke release of Seratonin and Dopamine. DMT is present naturally in the human body, especially in the gut. But only when paired with a MAOI (Monoamine oxidase inhibitor), which is found in Ayahuasca vine, can this molecule actually have its effects. The MAOI that are in the vine are classified as Beta-carbolines. These very special molecules are Harmine and Harmaline. Below is a photo of Ayahuasca vine Banisteriopsis caapi. Interestingly, when the molecule of harmine was first discovered in the vine, it was called “telepathine,”  because “of the reported effects of Ayahuasca among the indigenous users, including: collective contact with and/or visions of jaguars, snakes, and jeweled birds, and ancestral spirits; the ability to see future events; and as the name suggests, telepathic communication among tribal members.”(from wikipedia)

Harmine can also be found in Syrian Rue seeds (Peganum harmala) as well as in Passionflower leaf (much lower amounts.) My experiences with Syrian Rue seed (extract) have been very significant actually, while it isn’t really psychedelic all on its own, I highly value the medicine that it is for calming the mind, increasing serotonin and inducing flow states of consciousness. It also creates energetic sensitivity and increased psychic(”telepathine”) ability.  It ALSO is a powerful anti-parasitic- amazingly and much to my shock it rid my body of parasites! Thankfully it is NOT ILLEGAL(except in Australia where its controlled). The studies on Harmine and Harmaline are very promising and are shown to have significant healing properties, such as anti-inflammatory and anti-cancer actions. I’m very enthusiastic for the healing potential of Syrian Rue and Ayahuasca vine! 

One last thing before I close this share and it has to do with integrity and sustainability. The way I see it is that these plants are coming into prominence in our society right now because they are very much needed for our healing. We are facing various levels of existential crises, and I see these medicines acting like the white blood cells of this earth, to help us humans heal our sickness and reconnect to our sense of purpose and belonging to this world (not the world belonging to us, for our use/abuse). However, we cannot continue to take and take without giving back- that sort of behavior is how we’ve gotten ourselves into this imbalance within ourselves and the planet. It is my prayer and vision that those who are called to plant medicine path, do so with the intention of healing themselves so that they may be of service to the healing of the WHOLE. (There’s a lot more that could be said here about safety, the ceremonial container and the facilitator/shaman/medicine healer that creates the ceremonial container.I would recommend this article for this specific topic). Each person has their own unique calling and purpose in which they can serve the whole and that is for each soul to discover within. We start by healing ourselves...that is the key- because our individual healing ripples out. The healing light and love that we cultivate within shines out to inspire and awaken light and love in others. Our own inner harmony will reflect to the outer world. When we live our lives from a balanced place of “right relationship” and reciprocity, as a result we cultivate more integrity and mutual respect. We must integrate the wisdom we gain into daily practices that anchor more loving kindness and compassion because that is what is needed on this planet. 

Journey in Egypt (with music by Me, Mary Isis)

Traveling to Egypt was a dream come true for me. I have been fascinated by ancient Egypt since I was a young girl and this fascination led into my adult years with more in depth studies into the awesome ancient sites. When the opportunity came to me to travel with a small group of 6 other highly intentional people with similar interests, I made it happen- in spite of the not so great financial situation I was in- and I am SO gratefulfor the support I received to help make it happen for me. In this blog I will share about the amazing places I visited in a VERY full 10 days and I will offer my own reflections about the experiences as well as some travel tip/advice for anyone else interested in making this “pilgrimage.” I say pilgrimage because we were venturing with intentions for connecting to the energies of the places, feeling a remembrance in our souls for these ancient lands. I will first say that having a guide for our trip was *essential*- it just wold not have been possible- A guide is needed for many reasons. Egypt is not the easiest place to navigate and travel solo- to have a guide that knows the language, culture and how to negotiate with officials in absolutely necessary. Our guide was so wonderful, just reach out if you are interested in hiring him! So let’s get started!

My journey began actually in the country of Turkey. This was also a dream come true- literally. I have had a number of dreams related to Turkey- involving certain names and places and also a deep sense of remembrance. So if you want to skip straight to Egypt scroll down a little bit. 

(*Travel side note: I had frequent flyer miles through United Airlines that would cover most of my travels but for some reason I didn’t have a enough for round trip to Cairo and back. So I figured out a way to utilize my miles to take me to Izmir, Turkey and then from Frankfurt, Germany all the way home and so all I had to to do was buy 2 connecting flights: from Izmir to Cairo and from Cairo to Frankfurt- which cost around $550 for both, yet allowed me two extra little adventures with some dear friends living in this places- Plus- WHAY NOT since I’m going all the way out there~.)

TURKEY~  I arrived in Izmir, a city of over 4 miliion, to open the arms of my auntie Julianne, who now lives there as music teacher at an international school. She absolutely loves it there and I can see why. She lives in a very bustling part of the city called Alcancak and has a cute apartment that has a rooftop-soon to be garden- that overlooks the city. Below on the narrow streets are many restaurants and clubs with delicious Aegean/Mediterranean/Middle eastern foods and music. As well as being a teacher, she sings in a band, and most of her friends there are musicians. The very first night after getting in we went out to see one of her friend’s bands and met up with her other good friend, Mira, who had just gotten into town from Lebanon. I won’t go too into detail of my İzmir adventures but just provide some highlights: exploring the old and colorful places of Izmir, visiting a coastal village & getting to swim in the Aegean sea (literal dream come true) at a lovely beach and also going to visit the ancient city of Ephesus (Efes). (See photos below) I would absolutely love to return to Turkey to explore more of this country that has very ancient roots- of which I am quite fascinated by what is known of  Anatolian and Thracian cultures. And the site of Göbekli Tepe dates back perhaps over 10,000 years ago, and is evidence of an advanced civilization- an inconvenient anomaly for many historians. One of the aspects I love most about traveling is connecting with other human beings on the way. The language barrier doesn’t even really exist, especially with “google translator!.” 

Ok! now let’s get on with the Egypt journey shall we?!

DAY 1- arrival in Egypt~

I arrived in Cairo around 10:30 pm and  was greeted by someone holding a sign with my name on it when I got off the plane, who quickly escorted me through customs and helped me through purchasing the Visa on arrival (which was $25). That was all very helpful. I’ll just tell you right now that to have an organizer for our group made our travels SO easeful and smooth and I highly recommend it, ESPECIALLY if you want to travel with a small group of friends. AND if you would like me to connect you with our amazing organizer and/or guide reach out and let me know. I was then greeted at the baggage claim area by our official organizer, Ihab, who informed me of the current wild weather conditions that turned Cairo into a chaotic traffic jam with floods and accidents. He showed me to my private vehicle and driver that would take me to my hotel- The Mena House (the historic hotel that is located right next to the great pyramids of Giza). What would have been a 30 minute drive was more like and hour and a half with all the crazy traffic. I counted about 8 big accidents with car pile-ups and gratefully I arrived to the hotel safely and was shown to my room to rest. I remember getting my first glimpse of silouettes of the pyramids while approaching the hotel and it sent electricity through my body. I was really here! My room mate Tara arrived around 2 am along with the rest of the gang. And we were up early for breakfast to begin our first day!

DAY 2- GIZA / SAKKARA / DAHSHUR - (accomodations at the Marriot Mena House- Cairo’s oldest hotel, situated right next to the pyramids!)

After our breakfast we were off on our first adventure, to drive about 40 km south of Cairo into the desert to the pyramid complex of Dahshur- the largest of which is known as the “bent pyramid.”The real name of this pyramid is “Sneferu is shining in the south” (or “Sneferu is shining”) because it was covered in a  polished Tura limestone. It is not exactly known why there was the “bend” in angle of the pyramid. These are some of the oldest pyramids in Egypt, dating back to around 2600 BC. We were able to go inside of the smaller pyramid located behind the “bent” pyramid, which is thought by some to be the pyramid for the pharoah’s wife, although it may have been for more ritual purposes that for an actual burial.  Even being inside this small pyramid was impressive in its construction. (good preparation for the following day). It only reopened to the public in July of 2019, having been closed since 1965. I was also able to go inside of the Red Pyramid, which was the first “true” smooth sided pyramid ever built. That is the one seen in the photo above and below, followed by photos of the “Bent” pyramid and its smaller nearby “satellite” pyramid, which we went into. Notice the puddles from the rain!! We felt blessed from the rains, which cleared the air and kept the dust down in the desert!

Seen above is a large altar structure that is on the east side of Sneferu’s “bent” pyramid. It is what is left of the the temple from this pyramid.

We then headed north to Sakkara, to Kind Djoser’s “step pyramid.” This pyramid is actually the oldest pyramid of all. It is believed to have been designed by high priest Imhotep for Pharaoh Djoser. Imhotep is believed to have been Djoser’s chief officials and is a very important person of ancient Egypt. He was eventually deified as the god of medicine and healing, possibly 2000 years following his death. His name translates to “the one who comes in peace.” Although the tomb of Imhotep has not yet been found, it is thought is may lie somewhere in Sakkara. This “step pyramid” of Djoser will be soon opened to the public, and we were blessed to have gotten a small peek at the entrance/bottom of the stairs leading into the pyramid. 

After this exploration and feeling a new and growing fascination with Imhotep, we had the opportunity to visit a tomb that was over 5000 years old. Again, we were there all by ourselves and it was really incredible, the amount of artistry that went into this tomb- with multiple rooms, all with intricately carved and painted walls.  Afterwards we went to the town of Sakkara to have lunch and then to a place where beautiful rugs are handmade of wool, cotton and silk. I was walking aroung this place with stars in my eyes...and yes I did purchase that special Isis rug!!  Side note: When got to Sakkara step pyramid, it was right around lunch time and there was hardly anyone there because of that, which was quite nice to enjoy this place without the hordes of tourists. It pays to have a good and knowledgeable guide.

We finally headed back to our hotel to rest for the following big day.....

DAY 3- We arose very early, to depart around 4:30 am, to the Great Sphinx. The hotel was very close by so it didn’t take long before we were at the gates, and getting through security to be able to have a private two hours with the Sphinx. We arrived and walked quietly under the stars and magical waning crescent moon, to the paws of the Sphinx where we assembled into a circle and Tara led our first group ritual there. We received an anointing and a very special ormus tincture and each had the opportunity to speak our magical words of intention for what we wish to resurrect in our being. As the ritual was completed the first light began to show on the eastern horizon. All was quiet and peaceful until the first rays of light shone upon us all, sealing in the magical essence of which we all imbibed. We walked in wonder around this ancient monument that was carved from the bedrock of this land, perhaps over 10,500 years ago. I could only imagine what life was like on the earth then and how humanity lived. To think that this structure was created that long ago, challenges the the linear technological advancement of humanity and that we are currently the most advanced civilization. What this monument possibly signifies is the last/previous golden age that existed on earth, in which lived people that were highly advanced, with great knowledge of our place in the cosmos. Some may even postulate with good reason that our ancient origins lie somewhere else, not on this earth and that humans received (and possible still do receive) extra-terrestrial technological guidance. The third photo down is a photo I took from between the paws of the great Sphinx, and you can clearly see the constellation of “Orion’s belt,” which is thought by many progressive historians, such as Robert Bauval, to be related to the layout the the three great pyramids on the Giza plateau. 

After this magical experience we departed and drove out onto the Giza plateau for a great overview of the pyramids, in the early morning light. It was again, a great time to be there, as it was before anyone was up- no tourists and vendors trying to sell you stuff. It was quiet and peaceful.

Seen above, is a photo of myself with the powerful, beautiful women I was blessed to travel with. Alia: a soon to be mother and awesome music producer and DJ, Kanna: a fully embodied ceremonial healing arts practitioner, Maya: an accomplished life coach & mystery school high priestess and Tara, a songstress, Vedic astrologer and visionary entrepreneur...

In the later afternoon we prepared to visit and enter the great pyramid of Khufu (also known by his Greek name Cheops). He was the successor to his father, King Sneferu. These massive pyramids are made mostly of very large limestone blocks. Within “Khufu’s pyramid” there are 3 chambers, which are made of a dark granite that came from over 500 miles away. The pyramids used to be covered in a smooth white casing of limestone mortar, which must have been quite a sight!  The original entrance to this great pyramid is on the north side, about 59 feet above ground level. However, it may have never really been an “entrance” as it was all entirely covered up and it wasn’t until 820 AD, when the Arab Caliph Abdullah Al Manum, in a pursuit of finding tomb treasures busted his way through the pyramid making a tunnel until he accidentally “found” the original tunnel “entrance” and then also discovered the other shaft tunnels leading to the different chambers. Even though this pyramid has been regarded at King Khufu’s tomb, no treasure and no mummies were ever found. Being inside this pyramid I marveled at the advanced architectural engineering required to achieve such exquisite and perfect construction. 

Our group had an exclusive, private 2 hours in this great pyramid. We entered at sunset from this roughly hewn tunnel below and to the right of the true and original entrance. Once through that we reached the original shaft which went downward until it met another shaft leading upwards (the shaft does continue going down to a lower chamber which we did not go to). It was quite the climb up the steep, narrow and remarkably high shaft (see photo). The first and middle chamber that you reach would be the Queen’s chamber, however we kept going up to go to the King’s chamber first. Finally we were at the top of the shaft and then had to hunch over low to get through a short distance of perfectly rectangular tunnel and then we entered the King’s chamber, a box like room containing an empty and partially broken granite sarcophagus. I was in awe. The acoustics in the room were amazing, every sound echoing and resonating and then perfectly resolving to silence. We assembled into our guided formation and began our ritual, guided by Alia and Shane. I won’t go into too much detail about it but I will share that we each had the opportunity to give/receive healing hands and toning, each taking our turns to lay down in the middle. A few of us, including myself, took the opportunity to lay within the sarcophagus for a some moments. My intention was to let die any aspects in my psyche that impede my evolution and highest purpose...and to resurrect myself newly empowered.

Most of our time was in the King’s chamber, but we also got to go inside the Queen’s chamber, which was smaller and differently shaped, more chapel like. Upon exiting it was rather surreal, there were many people waiting to get inside- it was a whole film crew, and one guy dressed as Napolean Bonaparte- to play out the tale of his time alone in the great pyramid. Thankfully our trusty guides prevented this film crew from barging in and disturbing our time, which they were definitely ready to do! 

Day4-The next morning we were up bright and early and off to the airport to take a short flight 425 miles south to Aswan where we would be boarding on the Mayfair Nile cruise. Our group just happened to be the first people on board the ship so we had a wonderful relaxing time dropping in and relaxing. Then that afternoon we went to Philae, Temple of Isis. We took a quick shuttle to a little dock and then a motor boat ride to the “island” of Philae, where the temple is. This island is actually located in the reservoir of Aswan’s low dam, which was constructed in 1902. This caused the waters to rise and the Temple of Isis, in its original location, began to get inundated with the rising waters. In 1970 the it was decided that the temple would be moved to higher land so that it could be preserved for future generations. This process took 10 years and was finally re-opened in 1980. Its incredible to think that this entire temple was moved stone by stone. The temple is very beautiful and the energy is enhanced by the surrounding water. This area is/was held very sacred by the ancient Egyptians and Nubians. Just across the waters you can see where the temple once was, on a cataract of the Nile River. This area is also believed to be the burial place of Osiris. The temple’s construction began sometime around 350 BCE, yet evidence suggests that temples honoring Isis existed in this area as early as the 6th century BCE.

 After walking around the temple complex and learning about it all from our guide I found a place where I would lead our group’s ritual. I chose a small side room that had at one time been either a healing room. I felt that in this small room we would be undisturbed and (hopefully) be unnoticed by the guards, as any form of meditation or ritual is forbidden in Egypt’s ancient sites. Without going into too much of detail of the ritual, I will just say that we each had the opportunity to speak our words of power and healing, with the intention of infusing our every cell of our body with this healing light, calling upon Isis to hear our prayers. Each prayer was sealed with a self anointing of the “sacred communion” blend I brought with me. Fortunately we were able to complete our ritual before the tourist police showed up. We dispersed and still had more time to wander in wonder and revel in the healing energies before departing back to the Mayfair cruise. 

Not too surprised that a new song came through that evening on the boat! We had a lovely group dinner back on the ship that night. Every dinner we took the opportunity to check in with each other, and we each had the opportunity to share our feelings/thoughts about the guided intentional inquiries. This definitely helped to keep a conscious and ceremonial container for our group as well as maintaining a sense of harmony and understanding of each other. 

Day5-The following day after breakfast we were off early to the Kom Ombo temple, which we were able to walk to from the boat from its new “parked” location. Kom Ombo is a unique temple because it is a double temple, in honor of two different gods: Sobek, the crocodile creation god and Horus, the falcon headed God. These two gods are thought to actually be rivals. The temple has a clear central meridian line that runs through it. It is thought that this temple was once a pilgrimage site for healing and perhaps childbirth as there are sections of this temple dedicated to Hathor (Goddess of fertility and motherhood) and Khonsu (Goddess of the moon). There are fascinating heiroglyphs of women giving birth and of “two spirit” individuals. In the far back walls there are very unique hieroglyphs: very first known representations of precise surgical tools. Some of these tools include suction caps, scalpels, bone saws, dental tools, medicine bottles, forceps, birthing chairs and forceps! After we took as much time as we could feeling the vibes of this interesting temple we did a quick walk through of the crocodile mummy museum close by, before heading back on the ship. 

When we got back on the ship we had lunch and it was quite the spread! Very elaborately carved vegetables and delectable platters of food! (see photos below) The ship took off further down the nile and stopped again where we got off again, this time in Edfu. To get to the temple of Edfu, known as the “Horus temple,” we took 10 minute ride in little horse drawn carriages! That was rather fun, and if my mind remembers correctly, I think it was my first time being in a horse drawn carriage! This temple is a very well preserved temple of the ancient world, perhaps due to the fact that until the late 1700′s it was buried in the drifting desert sands and silt from the Nile River. Excavation projects to uncover this temple began in the 1860′s. What is unique about this temple is it’s art, depicting the epic battle between Horus and Set (Osiris’s brother) as well as many different chamber rooms to many different gods. The central chamber to Horus / “holy of holies” holds a black granite shrine where the golden statue of Horus once stood. In front of that is a replica of the wooden barque (the original can be seen at the Louvre in Paris), which would have held the golden statue of Hathor on festivals and during processions. This temple had a lot to see in each room, it was quite astounding. What was hard to ignore however was how many of the faces of the gods and goddess where chipped away, from when Christianity was on the rise and all things deemed “pagan” were promoted to be destroyed.

After an enchanting time at this temple we headed back on our horse chariots back to the ship and then cruised down through the night to Luxor!  

Day 6- In the morning, We left the boat and embarked on an all day journey out into the desert to Dendara and Abydos- first to the Temple of Hathor and then to the Temple of Osiris- both absolutely stunning in beauty and energy.

Hathor is the Goddess of Beauty, Healing, Joy, Music, Femininity, Fertility and motherhood. She is the cow headed goddess and consort to Horus. This temple is considered one of the most beautiful temples, because of its detailed art that covers its walls and high columns. What was especially impressive was the prevalence zodiac art on the high ceilings. This was a place of healing also, and the tempe had its own large water reservoir next to it. There was a lot to see here, with many rooms and interesting and mysterious art depictions. Again we were blessed to experience this temple at a very quiet time, with not too many tourists. We had a beautiful ritual in a private back temple building, in which we were given the key to enter the locked door and we sat inside for an undisturbed time. I feel like we were in a building that was once for the temple priestesses to prepare for rituals in the main temple, almost like an ancient  “green room.” As you will see, many of the faces of Hathor on the large pillars were etched out and destroyed, but I did find some intact ones in the excavated pieces that lie in front of the temple. (see photos) Also seen at this temple is the god Bes, ancient Egyptian god of childbirth, fertility, sexuality, humor, and war, but served primarily as a protector god of pregnant women and children. He is regularly depicted as a dwarf with large ears, long-haired and bearded, with prominent genitals, and bow-legged.

After our beautiful, enjoyable (and very hot) time in Dendara, we continued on our long drive to Abydos to the temple of Seti (temple of Osiris). This is a place of great interest, as the Temple of Seti is thought have been added on to more ancient Osireon which lies behind it. There are various reasons for this theory. The Osireon was built at a much lower level that the temple of Seti and is constructed with MASSIVE blocks of stone. The whole appearance of it is actually very similar to the valley temple that lies in front of the great Sphinx. There are little to no heiroglyphs on the structures, the only markings that can be found interestingly are two flower of life painted symbols- which are very faint and hard to see, especially since there was no access to go into the actual temple area itself, we could only stand out on the perimeters.  Also there is water present at the base of this ancient temple, due to its closeness to the water table. It is thought that is temple was where the sacred rites of Osiris were practiced and that it was a place of healing and magic. Once again, our time at this site was blessed, we had it to ourselves! It was very quiet, in an almost eerie way. It was also very dark, and a very masculine energy, a stark contrast from Dendara. There were many bats prevalent here too. As you’ll see in the art, Osiris is depicted commonly a green color, since he is the God of the underworld as well as Resurrection. What color do you turn after you die? In the last photos you can see the Osireion, which is notably very different looking. Look how massive those blocks of stone are!

It was a long drive back to the Mayfair and I enjoyed the drive, watching all the scenery and waving at kids in cars and on the street. I also sang some songs, and led a little sing along in the bus.

That our guide Yasser (above) listening intently. :)

Day 7- Valley of the Kings/Queens. We checked out of the Mayfair Cruise on this day and checked into the Sonesta St. George Hotel, in Luxor, which is situated on the Nile. It was a really nice hotel. After we were checked in we headed out on our big day to the Valley of the Kings and the Temple of Queen Hatchepsut. The Valley of the Kings is a vast necropolis located on the west side of the Nile in the stunning limestone and sedimentary rock high cliffed mountains.  There are 60 known tombs in the Valley of the Kings. what is incredible to consider is that they were put there for the purpose of never being found and disturbed! The monumental amount of work and detail goes into the building of these tombs left me feeling speechless. They are all located deep in the earth, and are ornately decorated along their walls. Most of the tombs were raided early on, yet even with what is left is awe-inspiring. The one very famous tomb is of “King Tut,” which was the one that had been found more recently than the others, and was still intact- All of the incredible treasures are now Cairo’s museum, so we didn’t even bother to go to the actual tomb, since it was empty and apparently the walls are pretty bare. One of most impressive of the tombs we did go into was of Ramses the 4 and 6th.

After exploring deep into about four of these massive tombs, we headed to Queen Hatchepsut’s temple and mortuary complex around in the next valley over. I am rather fascinated by this Queen, who was one two women who were pharoahs. She ruled possibly 20 years and was a well loved Queen who accomplished a lot for the benefit of her people. Although this is her mortuary temple, she was not buried here- she was buried in the Valley of the Kings. During the winter solstice, sunlight is able to penetrate the inside of the inner chapel, falling first on the chapel’s rear wall, and then moving across slowly to illuminate a large statue of Osiris. There is also an additional light box that allows a square of light to follow the temple’s central axis. As it travels along the axis, it first illuminates a statue of the god Amen-Ra, then a kneeling statue of King Thutmose III (her husband), and then finally a statue of Hapi the Nile god.I enjoyed this temple immensely, especially the portion dedicated to Hathor on the upper left side. Afterwards we went to the artisan village where people carve alabaster jars, statues and all sorts of things. Then we had a delicious Egyptian lunch overlooking the Nile river, with Luxor temple just on the other side. Then we went back to the nice hotel and chilled out, it was a beautiful sunset!

Day 8- Karnak and Luxor- Luxor is the arabic name meaning many palaces, and it used to be called Thebes by the Greek. It was at one time the most important political and religious center of Egypt. Luxor and Karnak temples are actually connected by a 1.7 mile avenue of Sphinxs, and there is a massive restoration project underway right now to clear this avenue to make it traversable again. Luxor was where the rise of the creator sun god Amun made the rise. Amun is depicted as a ram headed god. The worship of this almighty Amun which later became Amun-Ra, became a widespread yet it wasn’t until the rule of pharaoh Akhenaten that some major shifts started happening. He made some really big changes by banning polytheistic religion and instating a monotheistic religion of the worship of Aten. He had a new city built, Akhetaten, and abandoned Thebes as his capital. He also ordered the destruction of many polytheistic statue sites. When Akhenaten died in 1336 BCE, his son Tutankhaten (”King Tut”) took the throne, changed his name to Tutankhamun (1336-1327 BCE), and moved the capital of Egypt back to Thebes. He reinstated the old Egyptian religion and opened all the temples.  Being so very young, he was likely advised by his councillors to bring back the old ways to bring back the balance, the ma’at, which was ancient Egypt’s most important principle. 

Karnak is the largest religious temple complex in the world, covering 247 acres, its a  massive site with lots to see, with its giant obelisks (made of one single piece of granite!), over 130 huge pillars. Two hours was not really enough. It was built as a site for the worship of Amun but there are other temple on the site as well to the ancient mother earth goddess Mut, and to falcon god Montu.  Much of our time was at the small side temple to ancient creator, craftsman and healer god Ptah and his consort Sekhmet, the lion headed goddess of War, divine retribution and also healing. She is one of the most ancient and most fierce goddess that is called upon in times of war and in times of transformation Sekhmet was mentioned a number of times in the spells of The Book of the Dead as both a creative and destructive force, but above all, she is the protector of Maat (balance or justice) named “The One Who Loves Ma’at and Who Detests Evil.” We had a powerful group ritual, privately within this room with Sekhmet, (once again, we were given the key to the locked room) and we  amazingly had around 30 minutes, completely undisturbed, with which our guide exclaimed afterwards, “that just doesn’t happen! You are very blessed!” I made a vow that day to let go of my tendency to fear and worry, and I layed it all down at the feet of Sekhmet. I could feel the burden of suffering that was lifted from that willingness to just let it go. Another area I enjoyed exploring is the far eastern portion of the temple, behind the sanctuary of Amun, known as the botanical gardens, which was built by Thutmoses III (husband of Queen Hatchepsut). It was an area open to the sky with low walls uniquely decorated with carvings of plants and animals. 

After visiting Karnak we went to a special Egyptian perfumery run by a man who has been working with the sacred essential oils since his youth. He was an intuitive fellow that could easily read peoples energy and suggest what oils would be most beneficial for them. We got an in depth talk from him about the oils and the ancient Egyptian roots of perfumery and then of course we all ended up purchasing some. Since I was the very last person to decide on which oil I wanted ( I wanted them all!!) I finally narrowed it down to Jasmine, which is supposed to be good for the solar plexus- but I was lucky enough to have gotten gifted a $50 bottle of the rose oil too (which of course I had really wanted!).

  That evening, after a beautiful sunset, Tara and I marveled at the view from our hotel balcony of the new waxing moon low in the sky, with Venus, Mercury and Jupiter all visible!  We went to the temple of Luxor to walk within its grandeur under the stars. This temple is also called “the temple of Man” as its massive layout, as seen from above, models the human body with its perfect geometry. Our last ritual was successfully carried out in the very back of the temple, which would be like the “crown chakra” of the body After the ritual was sealed we had time to wander and marvel at the massive palace like Luxor temple and soak up the energy of this living temple. An interesting detail inside this temple is a mosque that was built later, within the temple. I visited this mosque the next day and ushered in by an enthusiastic person and was shown the interior and how within the mosque walls are the giant pillars of Luxor temple with their ancient hieroglyphs. Inside the mosque are a couple old tombs of Sufi saints as well as rooms for worship. 

The following day we had a good amount to time to relax before heading back to the Aswan airport to fly back to Cairo. After arriving in Cairo we had a lengthy drive to get to the Four Seasons hotel, through crazy Cairo traffic. But we were stoked when we arrived! That was most definitely the nicest hotel I’ve ever stayed in! Wow. We had a fun group dinner together in the Lebanese restaurant there, it was delicious!! Oh how I LOVE middle eastern food! The following day (Halloween!) we went to the Egyptian museum of Cairo, which houses many amazing treasures: countless statues, old relics, ancient jewelry and most impressive : the contents of King Tutankhamen’s tomb. It was there that we could also look upon his golden throne and many of his personal objects and most prized: the amazing gold mask that had been on his mummy- made of solid gold and inlay of lapis lazuli, obsidian, and quartz. It is around 2 feet long and weighs 25 pounds. What I found most impressive were his number of actual sarcophagi, I think there were like 5 giant golden boxes, one which fit into another. Also what was amazing to see was the stone box that held King Tut’s canopic jars- the jars that held his vital organs for the afterlife!!! After asking my guide Yasser, “Why is it that this King’s tomb was so extravagant?” and he answered- “They all were most likely like this, its just that his tomb was the only one found intact, and was not yet robbed.” This made me wonder- what has happened to all those stolen tomb treasures- treasures that were never intended to be touched or taken by anyone. 

After the museum we went to the Grand Bazaar of Cairo and had some shopping time. I didn’t do too much of that since I didn’t really have money to spend by this point! It was sure fun to look though! I didn’t have too much energy to haggle over prices, and I realized that really does suck my energy. Also, many of the store owners call out at you, asking questions like “where are you from?” in hopes to capture your attention. But most of the time they are really just trying to get you to come into their stores. A common tradition of hospitality is also offering you tea when you are in their store. I drank my fair share of tea, let me tell you ( in Turkey too)!

After the shopping bonanza we went for our last lunch together at a lovely place that overlooked a big garden area. There were many people there enjoying the day, especially many young school children, maybe on outings with their classes? I was actually starting to feel a little sad, knowing this was the end of our trip, but feeling very grateful too!

I departed early the next morning, back to the airport. I had three more nights in Germany, getting to visit with my dear old friend Aurora and her sweet family. What a contrast that was all of the sudden being in the clear cool air and magical forests! It was the perfect transition to returning home, where it was even colder! Well, its been a relaxing and reflective last few days integrating this big journey! Thanks for reading and following along! I am ever grateful for the support I received from loved ones to make this dream a reality! Would I go back? YES. If fact, I can recommend our amazing guide Yasser Al-Wahab, to anyone interested in making this sacred pilgrimage to Egypt, you would be in expert hands!

And here’s a few refreshing pics of Germany below! 

||~RESISTANCE~||

When...Where...How is it that you meet your walls?

the walls that you have built around your heart?

and All those places where you stand on guard ready to protect, project, fight or flight....

those fortresses of false protection that prevent you from the feeling and the healing that your soul desires?

Oh, those feelings....of disappointment. anger. sadness. fear. guilt. shame. all those wounds that you never tended to and that fester under all the ways you try to cover-up, avoid, or distract.... 

That hurt child that got left in the shadows....needs Love. 

The depth of despair within you....needs Love.   

Its time to light a candle of remembrance for the darkness within you that is ready to come meet the light of your Love. 

And in this meeting may there be a shared Gratitude for all the ways you have been given the opportunity to learn and grow and remember~ 

This Present...The Gift of your Presence....is the only place one can truly Live.

In response to Oakland's unanimous vote to decrimilaize mushrooms containing psilocybin: May the awareness of the value of Earth's medicines continue to spread throughout our communities, cities, countries...Until the people of the earth give the honor and respect that they deserve- In this awakening of consciousness and remembrance of our inherent connectedness, we are ALL in some process of HEALING. Much of Humanity needs a lot of healing at this time, due to our disconnection from life and all the repercussions that have occurred because of it. And thankfully our plant and fungal allies are there for us- and I dare say we Need their help! I reflect on the quote by Albert Einstein: "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them" and I think these medicines of the earth can help us to open new pathways of thinking and perception that will help us to heal and solve many problems we are facing- first and foremost they will help us open our hearts and minds to REMEMBER LIFE'S INHERENT VALUE- and then perhaps we might begin acting in accordance with this experienced truth. The brainwashing that has occured over time to view these natural and *safe substances* as "illicit drugs" has created a very unfortunate perception of them and many misunderstandings. (*& I mean safe, as compared with synthesized pharmaceuticals and other legal substances). The legal substance ALCOHOL has bar FAR shown to be the most harmful and deadly in our human population. These natural psychedelic substances that come from the earth that have been used for healing and exploration of consciousness for who knows how long, They work in with our body systems/brain chemistry in a way that *can be very helpful & harmonious- due to their close similarities with our own chemistry. For goodness sakes, we have EVOLVED over thousands and thousands of years with these beings- we even have cannabinoid receptors, for example! The psilocybin in "magic mushrooms", is VERY similar to our own very important neurotransmitter serotonin and the studies that have been already done with how psilocybin positively affects the brain have been very promising!Lastly- my own disclaimer on Psychedelics: "they aren't for everyone," especially not for those who have a strong resistance to surrendering their ego and control, and who would rather not look deeply at their own soul. The etymology of the word psychedelic, which was coined in 1956 by the psychiatrist Humphrey Osmond, is : psychē (ψυχή, "soul") and dēloun (δηλοῦν, "to make visible, to reveal")- SOUL REVEALING. We are in REVEALING TIMES. Some might even say "Apocalytic" - and this word also has its greek roots of meaning "To Uncover or Reveal." And so I am of that unorthodox and heretical nature to praise psychedelics in these apocalyptic times! I am truly grateful for their role in my life and will stand firm for the freedom to explore my consciousness and soul.