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nct dream mlst

pairing — college bf!jeno x f!reader

genre — fluff, (barely) suggestive, college au

syn — you’re running late, but jeno doesn’t seem to care. apparently, he’s got all the time in the world to make you stay.

you were already ten minutes late to class.

your tote bag’s stuffed lazily, headphones tangled in your hand, and there’s a quiz you absolutely can’t miss. but none of that matters right now, because jeno’s walking slowly beside you on purpose, hand brushing yours every few steps.

“you’re gonna be fine,” he murmurs, tilting his head down to look at you.

“i’m already late,” you say, quickening your pace.

he tugs gently at your shoulder strap, just enough to slow you down again. “you could be later.”

you glance at him. “i could fail.”

“you could skip.” he stops walking completely, shrugging. you try to keep moving but his hand is warm on your wrist now, easing you toward the shadowed hallway off to the side of the main one. you could protest, but god, you’re not made of stone.

his back hits the wall first, but then he pulls you around the corner and switches positions so it’s your back against the cold block and his hands resting on your hips. he’s close, not too close, but just close enough to make your stomach drop.

“jeno,” you whisper.

“hm?”

“i really need to go.”

his other fingers graze your hip, just barely, fingers slipping under the hem of your shirt like normal. like it he wasn't on the brink of driving you crazy.

“you sure?” his voice drops a little. he leans in, his lips near your jaw. “you don’t wanna stay with me?”

you do. god, you really do.

“i studied so hard for this quiz,” you say, almost breathless because of how warm his mouth is, how his thumb’s stroking lazy circles on your waist.

“cute,” he murmurs, lips brushing the shell of your ear now. “just let me distract you.”

you press your hand to his chest. not to push him away. but really just to feel him. his heartbeat is steady, calm, like he’s got all the time in the world to keep you pressed between him and this wall.

“if i miss it, i’ll have to beg the professor to let me retake it,” you say, eyes flicking up to meet his.

he smirks. you could already sense the remark coming your way. “or you could practice begging with me.”

you bite back a smile. “you’re so annoying.”

“you love me anyway.”

his forehead touches yours, noses brushing, his breath warm as his hand curls more securely around your waist. you lean in just enough to test it, like you might kiss him if you didn’t know better.

he almost kisses you first.

almost.

but then he pulls back with a quiet groan, hands sliding off you, running his fingers through his hair, like he needs to cool himself off.

“go,” he mutters reluctantly, stepping back. “before i change my mind.”

you stare at him for a beat. “you sure?”

he exhales through his nose. “absolutely not.”

you grin, heart pounding, and start walking backwards toward class. he watches you go, hands stuffed in his pockets like he didn’t just try to pin you to the wall on a thursday morning.

you’re barely halfway down the hall when he calls after you.

“you’re mine after,” he says, loud enough to make your stomach twist.

mark lee mlst

pairing — mark lee x gn!reader

genre — pure angst, no happy ending, no closure, (missed) communication

syn — a love lost to silence, and a voicemail from mark that you never heard.

note — i miss him so bad fr

months had gone by. it was enough time for people to stop asking what happened between you and mark. enough time for you to pretend you didn’t flinch or feel your heart drop when someone brought up his name.

it ended badly, but not in the way people think. there was no fight, no screaming, no dramatic scene. just silence and distance. it crept in slowly, swallowing the relationship before either of you could fight it.

you changed your number after that. and not because of him. instead because everything felt like too much. you needed to cut things off, start clean. new number. new start.

you never knew about the voicemail he had left you.

not until months later, sitting beside a mutual friend scrolling through old group videos, laughing too loud at the way mark used to pull faces at the camera just to make you smile. and somewhere in the middle of it, your friend casually brought it up.

“you ever hear that voicemail he left you?”

you blink. “what voicemail?”

they pause. “wait… he said he called you, like, really late one night. left a whole speech, practically. you didn’t get it?”

your stomach drops.

“when?”

“i think it was, like…two weeks after you broke up? he was drunk, maybe. just emotional. but he said he meant every word.”

your blood runs cold. “i changed my number.” you shake your head.

voicemail - 2:13am

“hey…uh. it’s me, um…”

mark laughs under his breath. it’s not a happy sound. more like he’s trying to hold himself together. hold his tears back.

“i know i shouldn’t call. and you probably won’t listen to this anyway. but i uh…i need to say something.”

he pauses then sighs.

“i miss you. not in the ‘i’m lonely’ kind of way. i mean, i miss you. like, you. your annoying smile when you’re right. the way you hum when you cook. the way you look at me...i miss all of it. all of you.”

his voice breaks a little.

“i know i messed everything up. i wasn’t around enough. i didn’t fight hard enough. i thought if we just let things cool down for a while, maybe we’d find our way back to each other. but it’s been days. and it’s getting harder to breathe knowing you’re not here.”

he’s rubbing his face, trying to pull it together.

“i don’t expect anything from this. i just…i needed you to know that you mattered. and that you still do. and i love you. i should’ve said it more. maybe…maybe that would’ve been enough.”

a shaky breath.

“if you ever want to talk… i’ll be here. i love you, y/n.”

click.

later that night, alone in your room, you lie awake wondering what he said. if he cried. if he hesitated before pressing send. you wonder if he said he loved you. if he was sorry, if he asked for another chance. so many ‘if’s’ ran through your head. you’d never know. but you did know that he did call. he did try. you just never heard it, and somewhere across the world, mark probably thinks you heard every word.

maybe he thinks you didn’t answer because you didn’t care, but you did. you still do. and mark never knew you didn’t hear it. so he waited for days, then weeks. replayed the message. watched the clock. told himself maybe you needed time. maybe you were just angry. maybe you needed to process things. but eventually, the silence settled in his heart, thick and suffocating.

he took your silence as an answer. but somewhere, that voicemail still exists. somewhere, that love still exists.

and maybe that was the tragedy of it all. not that the love was gone, but that it was still mutually there, and neither of you knew it.

nct dream mlst

pairing — nonidol!haechan x f!reader

genre — fluff, intimate, soft times!

syn — there is a theory that the spot where your beauty marks are, is where your soulmate have placed a kiss.

you and donghyuck tangled up in the blanket, the atmosphere calm and silent, just the feel of your boyfriend's fingers drawing random patterns on your back as he wishes he could pull you even closer to his body― despite the heat.

"you're so pretty," you said as you gaze at his tranquil face. his eyes were just closed, but donghyuck opened one of them to look at you with that nonchalant expression. therefore, he cut his act and snuggled his head onto the crook of your neck.

"you're even prettier, naekkeo," with a muffled voice, he replies to your compliment. the heat coming out of his mouth and laying against your neck made shivers go down to your spine.

"you know what i love about your face?"

donghyuck frowns as he glances up at you. "about my face?"

you hum and you continue: "your beauty marks."

"my beauty... marks?"

"your beauty marks," you nod your head.

"why is that?"

you shrug a bit as you think if you should or not should tell him about the soulmate theory.

"because i think they're pretty, so what?" you tease him, placing your hands on both of his cheeks and rubbing your thumb against his soft skin.

"there's nothing about it," donghyuck smirks and went to steal a peck from your lips. "and you know what i love about you?"

"not about my face?"

"not about your face." he shakes his head, making you feel kind of bad for making that compliment mainly about his face.

"what is it?"

"it's how- i can't even explain in words," he pauses, observing every single feature constituting your face. "you just feel like... comfort. you are welcoming― cozy; and, of course, beautiful."

you smile at his words, "you know, now i'm feeling kind of bad because i complimented your looks..." you admit, pouting, still caressing his cheeks. you notice a frown form in his face after he kissed his teeth.

"tsk, nonsense." he steals another peck from you.

and a few minutes of adoration covered by silence lingered in the air. however, you quickly shook that air away, "hyuck," he hums with his eyes closed again. "wanna hear something corny but cool?" your boyfriend slowly opened his eyes.

"what is it?" he pulls you closer while glancing up at you.

"did you know that there is a theory that," you pause before placing a peck somewhere on his face, "each beauty mark" *peck*, "we have on our bodies" *peck*, "means is where our soulmate placed a kiss on our" *peck*, "past lives...?" you make a rhetorical question.

"really?" donghyuck doesn't sound amused, until suddenly your face began to be showered with kisses instead.

"what are you doing?" you manage to ask between giggles and pecks.

your boyfriend smooches your lips, "making sure your face has freckles in your next life!"

"you know that they're different, right?"

you notice the way his smile kind of dropped, but he shrugged and said: "you'll have beauty marks as pretty as mine in your next life, then."

and he continues placing hundreds and thousands of kisses on your face and neck this time.

"let's place a kiss on the same spot so we can have the same beauty mark so we encounter ourselves in our next life, see the mole and think we are soulmates for life!" your boyfriend says, excitedly.

"but what if we're not soulma-" he shushes you with another smooch.

"shut up, otherwise your lips will be covered with moles!"

txt mlst

pairing — choi soobin x f!reader

genre — fluff, comfort/cozy

warning — nsfw content

soobin didn’t mean to stay up until three a.m., but when there was a brand new dlc for his favorite video game, it was a near given.

when he finally drags fuzzy sock-clad feet to his bedroom, a rush of warmth consumes his chest when his eyes settle on you sound asleep and sprawled across the expanse of his mattress.

linen comforter fisted in your hand, your pouty lips parted softly as quiet snores sound from your mouth. he smiles to himself, kind and loving, as he tiptoes over the fluffy carpeting, gentle fingertips reaching out to brush across your forehead. as usual, you’re stretched diagonally from corner to corner of his cozy bedding — he hates having to wake you up in the middle of the night, shifting your sleeping form to your designated side (soobin always sleeps on the left, even when you’re not staying over — it’s yours, through and through).

he swallows as he tenderly slips an arm around your waist. it’s particularly warm these days, leading bright sunny days into sticky, bleary evenings. sweat seems to permeate your soft skin as he quietly coos in the shell of your ear; a response to the sharp draw of breath from your nose when you come to, allowing him to reposition your body with minimal protest.

he tucks himself into your side, assuming the position of big spoon. both your bodies seem to cling together from the honeyed sweat painting each of your forms, but neither of you minded in the moment. in an hour or two, you’ll both wake up on opposite ends of the bed but for now, soobin can’t fathom the thought of not being pressed up against your warmth beside him.

he’s surprised when a wordy mumble breaks the silence of the dark room. the only other sound is the ceiling fan rotating above you both, just fast enough to create an ongoing and much-needed breeze. a “hm?” breaks free from his throat as he reaches up to caress the side of your face. unsure if you’re sleep-talking or awake, he presses a fluttering kiss to the space just below your earlobe.

“it’s late,” you repeat. the syllables sound thick and groggy but he still understands, nodding into your neck.

“i know, i’m sorry bunny,” he murmurs, “was really into my new game.”

a sleepy sigh followed by your foot hooking over his ankle — you back up against his body, your ass to his crotch, your back to his chest. impossibly closer.

“it’s okay.”

the silence returns as his thumb draws circles into your bare hip, just below where your (his) tee-shirt falls. he thinks you’ve fallen back asleep when you hum, eyelashes flittering as you moved onto your back. he looks down at puffy eyes, bedridden hair, fading lovebites peeking beneath the neckline of his shirt. a vision of heaven, he thinks.

“you wanna?” you ask, unhurried and hushed. he knows what you meant. the two of you do this sometimes when you both wake up in the middle of the night or he’s just ending a gaming marathon. in a gloomy twilight bedroom, your inner thighs burning as you ride him, skin slapping, catching one another’s breathy moans in wet kisses—or you on all fours, filthy sentiments spilling from his mouth while he pumps his cock inside of you, prying your cheeks open for his viewing pleasure. a dirty picture meant for only each other, hours after you’ve bared your body to the open web.

“yeah,” he breathes, his length already hardening underneath his briefs. it’s somewhat of a rehearsed dance as you pull your shirt up and over your chest, nipples peaking from the ceiling fan’s breeze. he’s just as fast in his efforts, cock bumping against your lower stomach as he loops long fingers around the base, squeezing just hard enough to elicit a throaty groan.

foreplay isn’t needed or wanted for your late night escapades, even if it takes him a few tries to fit his cock between your walls. it only makes you press your fingernails deeper into his muscled shoulder blades; an experiment of slight pain and denial on either side, a test neither of you are interested in failing. finally, he’s in, balls tight and swollen and snuggled up against you, the sound of your whimpery pants overwhelming his senses.

when he begins to move, it’s familiar and it’s comfortable and good— so good, as he sits up against his heels to watch his length bully itself inside over and over again. wet and slick, entirely too consuming for you both.

the only source of light is the moon, high and mighty in the sky, streaming in through the curtained window of his bedroom. it’s like a disco ball shimmering its pride over your contorted face; pretty, nostalgic, and an image he yearns to commit to memory. a permanent polaroid he tucks into his hippocampus.

he hopes that the next time the disco ball invites you to party, he’s by your side once again, bright and gleaming.

nct dream mlst

pairing — zhong chenle x f!reader

genre — fluff, comfort, possibly more than friends

you hadn’t meant to steal it.

really, you hadn’t.

but it was cold that night, and chenle had shrugged off his oversized hoodie without hesitation, draping it over your shoulders before you could even finish complaining about the breeze.

“there,” he said simply, the sleeves swallowing your hands completely. “problem solved.”

you hadn’t taken it off since.

it smells like him. like laundry detergent and that cologne he only wears on lazy days. it’s soft and just slightly too big in the way that makes it feel safe, like you’re being held even when he’s not near you.

he hadn’t asked for it back. and you weren’t about to bring it up.

until today.

he catches you wearing it again when he walks through your front door, keys jingling in his hand. he pauses, mid-step, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he closes the door behind him.

“still wearing that?” he teases lightly.

you freeze. heart jumping. “i can give it back.

you don’t mean to sound nervous, but you do. it’s not just a hoodie. not really. not when it’s his. not when it’s warm and safe and smells like someone you maybe love a little too much to admit.

he blinks at you like your offer doesn’t make any sense.

then he shrugs, kicking off his shoes and walking toward you with that casual, unbothered confidence that always makes your stomach twist.

“nah,” he says, sitting beside you on the couch. “you can keep it.”

he says it like it’s nothing.

but your heart? it flips. crashes. scrambles to catch up.

you glance at him, like maybe he didn’t mean it, like maybe you heard him wrong. but he’s already picking up the remote and leaning back like he didn’t just hand you the entire sky in a throwaway sentence.

you tuck your knees up to your chest, bury your face in the collar.

it’s still warm.

he doesn’t see your smile. but you think he knows it’s there.

bookshelf

000. ──── 0T9

001. ──── EJ

002. ──── FUMA

003. ──── K

004. ──── NICHOLAS

005. ──── YUMA

006. ──── JO

007. ──── HARUA

008. ──── TAKI

bookshelf

000. ──── 0T5

001. ──── HANBIN

002. ──── JIWOONG

003. ──── MATTHEW

004. ──── TAERAE

bookshelf

000. ──── 0T6

001. ──── KEEHO

002. ──── THEO

003. ──── JIUNG

004. ──── INTAK

005. ──── SOUL

bookshelf

000. ──── 0T5

001. ──── SOOBIN

· gamer!soobin x camgirl!reader

002. ──── YEONJUN

003. ──── BEOMGYU

004. ──── TAEHYUN

bookshelf

000. ──── 0T6

001. ──── JENO

· mine after

002. ──── RENJUN

003. ──── HAECHAN

· beauty marks

· you love iced americano and haechan just wants attention / coming soon

004. ──── JAEMIN

005. ──── CHENLE

· hoodie

bookshelf

000. ──── HCS

001. ──── ONESHOTS

002. ──── FLUFF

003. ──── ANGST

· love lost

004. ──── SMUT

in your corner (part seven) : lee jeno

pairing — boxer!jeno x med-student f!reader

warnings — language, smut, alcohol, violence

[ boxer!nct dream mini series ]

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, end!

note — lengthy parts, so be aware but mostly enjoy..!

it’s four a.m. when jeno knocks on your door two weeks later.

you, like most people at this time of the very early morning, are in bed when you hear the frantic knocking on your front door. you’d been asleep for less than two hours, having only made it back home from that night’s match at two a.m. (jeno had dislocated his opponent’s shoulder, as well as split the skin of his forehead, and it took you some time to clean them up), and almost doesn’t get up. your neighbors have no problem with making as much noise as they see fit at any time of the day, and you assume it’s one of their drunk friends trying to find a place to stay overnight. thinking you’ll just wait for them to go away, you pull your comforter up to your chin tightly.

and then the person knocks again. and again. and again.

once it’s clear that you won’t be getting any sleep until you dealt with whoever is pounding on your front door, you angrily pull yourself out from under your covers, throwing a hoodie over your tank top to cover yourself.  you grumble to yourself as you walk from your bed to your front door, ready to curse out whoever it is that gets so drunk that they can’t remember which apartment their friends live in.

and then you see jeno.

he looks more or less the same as he did when you left him at the gym two hours ago, save for the black eye that’s darkened in your absence. his hair is wild, falling carelessly over his forehead to dust the lid of his eyes. he’s dressed in casual street clothes, his expression, like always, is unreadable, but when you meet jeno’s eyes after he looks you up and down, you can define one thing: longing.

then again, you may just be imagining that as a symptom of sleep deprivation.

“jeno, what are you doing here?” you demand, opening your door a little wider once you realize that he’s not a stranger. “it’s four in the morning!”

“i know. i’m sorry.” jeno glances over your shoulder, as if he’s checking to make sure you’re alone. “can i come in?”

your mouth drops open in confusion, but you still take a step back from the door. where else is he supposed to go at this time of night? “i—yeah. alright.”

jeno walks into your apartment slowly, his eyes scanning your living space like he’s seeing it for the first time. you think that maybe he doesn’t remember much about it from when he was last here, seeing he had been drunk and in pain at the time. still, you didn’t appreciate how he seems to be evaluating how you live, especially when he smirks as he spots the teddy bear on your bed that you had hidden when he was last there.

“did i wake you?” jeno asks slowly, as if the idea that you had been sleeping had just occurred to him.

“it’s four in the morning.” you repeat in a deadpan voice. “yes. you woke me, and you better have a damn good reason for it.” your eyes scan over his body again, in case there’s an injury from the fight that you didn’t notice before. or a stab wound. honestly, with jeno, you felt like there were any number of things that he could show up at your door to ask for help with.

and you knew that you’d help him. no matter what.

jeno rakes a hand through his hair, and you wonder how his rings don’t get caught as he does it. then you tell yourself to stop looking at his rings, because if you look at his rings, you’ll look at his hands, and if you look at his hands—

“my dad left when i was a kid.”

jeno’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. you refocus on him, watching as the cracks in his façade slowly open up again to reveal the nervousness behind his words.

“what?” you ask, brow furrowing in confusion. you think that you should tell him to sit, but by the energy radiating off of jeno, you don’t think he’ll listen.

“my dad left when i was a kid.” jeno repeats, his voice wavering for just a second. he clears his throat before continuing. “i was around seven when he ran off, and then it was just my mom, my sister, and i. my mom did her best to take care of us herself, but it—it was hard. we never really had much, and what we did have, she spent on my sister and i, to make sure that we were alright.”

“jeno, i don’t understand.” you reach for him hesitantly, but pause before your fingers actually make contact with his jacket. “why are you telling me this?”

jeno licks his lips once, and you watch as he flexes and unflexes his right hand. “i’m trying to…to be open. to be honest.”

a beat passes between you both before you comprehend his words. “you—what?”

“you said i had to be honest with you.” jeno’s teeth worry his bottom lip, chewing it for a moment before he continues. “and i-i want to try it. i want to make this work—make us work. i’ve been thinking about it for the last few weeks, but tonight, when you were helping me after the match, i just—” the words are spilling out of him faster than they ever have before, like a dam has burst, and jeno is getting washed away in the flood. and taking you with him. “i wanted to kiss you. i almost did, but that wouldn’t be right of me, because you told me what you wanted, and what you needed, so i went home, but i couldn’t stop thinking about you, and missing you, and wanting you, because i want you so bad, y/n—”

“jeno.” you touched his shoulder this time, rubbing your hand against him in soothing circles. “take a deep breath, yeah? slow down. how about we sit down on the couch, and i’ll get us a drink, and then we’ll talk, okay?”

jeno’s eyes soften at the suggestion, and color rushes to his cheeks, flushing his pale skin to a light pink. “yeah.” he mumbles, his hands rubbing over the sleeves of his jacket. “i want that.”

the way he says, “i want that,” such a simple phrase, causes your heart to thump in your chest. there’s something so sincere in his tone, but you didn’t want to let yourself hope. you need to hear everything he has to say before you let yourself be that foolish.

you walk to your tiny kitchen, pulling out two glasses and filling them halfway with whiskey and ice. the whiskey had been a gift from that year’s secret santa gift exchange in the nursing program, and you had yet to open it, as you didn’t have much of a taste for sipping liquors. however, tonight seems to call for something stronger than regular beer.

when you return to jeno, he’s stripped off his long jacket, but his patterned shirt doesn’t seem to be warm enough to stop him from shivering. you hand the drink to him, frowning as you touch his arm.

“are you cold?” you ask in concern, despite his skin feeling as warm to your touch as it usually is. “i can get you a sweater…”

jeno shakes his head once, taking a long sip of the whiskey. “no, just—nervous, i guess.”

you nod softly, pulling your feet under you to sit cross-legged on the couch. you want to watch jeno straight on as he speaks. “finish what you were saying earlier.” you murmur. “if…you can.”

“can’t remember how far into my speech i got.” jeno laughs once, short and anxious, his hand tugging on his hair again. “i was rehearsing it on my walk over, but i blanked the moment you opened the door.”

“there was something about…” you wrap your hands around your full glass. “needing me?”

jeno’s cheeks pinken again. “right. yeah. that’s…new for me. i’ve never needed someone before in a—in the way that i need you. i have my mom and sister, and doyoung, but you…you’re different.” he busies himself with another sip of his drink. “it’s like…it’s so confusing, y/n. i know i shouldn’t. i’ve had that talk with myself countless times, and with you, and i’ve told myself that you’re so much better off without me, but i just can’t make myself let you go.”

you purse your lips, your eyes dropping to your lap as you answer in a careful and controlled voice. “i feel the same. i haven’t stopped thinking about you in weeks. i don’t think i’m capable of it, really. you’re—you’re under my skin. and it’s new, and strange, and uncomfortable, but only when i’m away from you. when i’m with you, it feels as easy as breathing.”

jeno rubs his lips, and you can tell that he’s still processing what you said, which you don’t blame him for. when he continues with his story, instead of commenting on your response, you felt a sense of relief. he’s not retreating back into the familiarity of being guarded. not yet. “so…so my dad left. and mom tried, but we weren’t in a super good place. my sister wanted to go to college, so she took out loans, and my mom remortgaged the house, and…all the bills piled up at once. and i didn’t even know until we were about to lose the house. i found her crying one day, my mom…” jeno’s eyes get a far away look in them. “she said she…felt like she failed us, which is ridiculous, because she’s—she’s just the best,” a smile flickers on jeno’s face for a brief moment. “you’d like her.” he takes another sip of whiskey before continuing. “well, i had just graduated high school, and i didn’t really have any…plans.  college didn’t seem that important at the moment, so i went to work. i had to take care of her, you know?” jeno fiddles with a ring on his finger. “i was the man of the house. i had to take care of her. so i went to work, and i boxed a bit in my free time, nothing serious, but it still wasn’t quite enough. i knew that there were…easier ways to make money. and i could make a lot of money fast, and send it back home, and make sure that everything was okay. so…that’s what i did.”

“i remember. johnny told me.” you bit your lip, tapping your fingers against your glass. “he said that he sent you away at first.”

“he did. it pissed me off.” irritation flickers through jeno’s eyes. “i’d come so far, only to be turned down because i didn’t have as much muscle as the other fighters, when i knew i could fight three times as good. but i couldn’t just go home, so i trained. i fought at some other gyms while training, but none of them paid as much as johnny’s. boxing there…i have enough money to send home to mom while living here. it’s high risk, but it’s high reward.”

you finally take a sip of your whiskey, trying your best to hide the grimace that crawls onto your features. “do you really think you’re going to box for the rest of your life?”

“i do.” jeno answers immediately. “i’m no good at anything else. i’ll box until my body gives out, and after that i’ll train others, if i can. either way…this is my life. this is as far as i go, really. and you…”

“i still have more school ahead of me.” you run your finger over the rim of your glass as you replied. “but i’m not—i said it before. you want to paint me as good, when we both ended up at that gym. i needed the money too.”

jeno shifts on the couch, repositioning himself to look at you better. “i was open with you. i…shared. will you share with me, now?”

you hesitate, but knew you couldn’t say no. “share what?”

it takes jeno a moment to settle on a question. “you had clothes from an ex.” he says finally. “what happened with them?”

you sigh, leaning your head against the back of the couch. “his name was jaehyun. we met in high school. we started dating in our junior year, and continued dating until last year. he goes to school at university of seoul. we…i was in love with him. very in love with him.” you glance at jeno, watching how his jaw tenses as you said that. “and, um, it didn’t work out. well, at first, actually, it did. kind of. he proposed to me about eighteen months ago, and i said yes.” you look down at your left ring finger, the only finger on your hands that has no ring tan line. “and then he started talking about me transferring, leaving gachon, so i could be with him, and then that conversation changed to me dropping out altogether, so i could plan the wedding, get married, have kids, and just—just be what he wanted.” your voice cracks in a mixture of hurt and anger, and you knew both emotions were apparent in your eyes when you met jeno’s gaze. “he wanted a wife. he didn’t want me. so i sent back the ring about six months before i met you, and i haven’t heard from him since. the clothes are just…they’re left over from when he came to visit me. i know i should get rid of them, but it’s…hard, you know? to let go of someone…”

“i know.” jeno twists one of his rings around his finger, the same one that he always fidgets with, a plain silver band. “this is my dad’s wedding ring. i found it in my mom’s room before i left. i didn’t know she still had it, or why she still had it, and i don’t know why i took it, but i just looked at it and…felt like i needed it.”

you set down your drink before taking jeno’s hand in your own, rubbing your thumb over the band. “he’s your dad. it’s alright.”

jeno stares at your intertwined hands, and his voice is thick when he replies. “i’ve never told anyone that. about the ring, or my dad leaving.  i never really talk about it.”

“i’m glad you told me.” you kept your voice soft as you move closer to him. “i meant it when i said i wanted to know you. that means the bad as well as the good.”

“i know you say that now, but—but no one stays forever, y/n.” jeno’s voice drops impossibly low. “everyone leaves eventually. you will, too, once you see what i’m like.”

“i don’t care. i really don’t.” you shake your head fiercely. “i’ve seen what you’re like. i’ve seen you happy and angry and irritated and guarded, and i want it all. do you know how long i’ve waited to feel this way about someone?” you play with his fingers as you spoke, adoring the familiar warmth that you feel in his skin. “it was never like this with jaehyun.”

“you said you didn’t want a protector. and all i want to do is protect you.” jeno brings your hand to his lips, kissing the inside of your wrist gently. “i don’t want to force something that you don’t want—”

“it’s different if we’re—if you and i—” you flush as you watch him kiss along your wrist and hand. “i’ll be your protector as much as you’ll be mine. we’ll protect each other. we’ll be equal.”

“y/n, you’re so much—we’ll never be—”

“we’ll be equal.” you repeat firmly, unfolding your legs from beneath you. you sit up on your knees right next to jeno, cupping his cheeks with both hands. “that’s all i’ve ever wanted. can you give that to me?”

a soft breath leaves jeno’s lips, and it washes over you in the sweetest way. “yes.” he says sincerely.

“good.” you swallow hard as a fire starts to burn in your core. “will you give that to me?”

“yes.” jeno’s hands shift to your waist, pulling you impossibly closer to him until you’re straddling his lap.

you rub your thumbs along jeno’s jaw. “do you need me?”

jeno’s brown irises flicker to your lips and back again. you’re starting to get better at reading his eyes, you think, although you’re still not as good as you’d like to be. you still can’t see exactly what’s swirling inside them, but in this moment, you think you have an idea of it.

“yes.” jeno says again, his hands moving up your back. “i need you.”

you press a chaste kiss over jeno’s forehead scar, down his temple, his cheek, his jaw, delighting in every soft breath and sigh that escapes him. “do you want me?”

your voice is barely above a whisper when you ask, and jeno matches your tone perfectly as his fingers press into your back. “more than anything.” he breathes, tilting his head back as you kiss his neck. “i want you more than anything.”

you kiss across his neck, down to his collarbones, before traveling up the other side of his face. you kiss across jeno’s jaw again, his cheek, back to the scar-free side of his forehead, planting one last kiss in the center of it before pressing your own forehead to his. “then kiss me.” you whisper, half panting the words.

jeno’s breath is just as ragged as yours as one of his hands tangles in your sleep-mussed hair, pulling you both together until your lips meet.  the contrast between the softness of his lips and the roughness of his tongue delights you, and you found yourself pressing closer and closer to him just to feel it more. your arms wrap around his shoulders as you try to get as close to him as possible. after spending so long waiting, you want to feel him close to you. you want to be his, in every sense of the word.

a wrecked moan falls from your mouth as jeno’s teeth graze your lips, his tongue immediately soothing the spot after he nips at you. he repeats the action over and over, anything to hear you moan again, and you have to pull away to collect yourself. you’re not sure if it’s the whiskey or jeno, but your head is spinning in the best way.

undeterred, jeno’s lips move to your neck, kissing and nipping just as much as they did before. “is this alright?” he mutters between kisses, his hands pushing up your hoodie to get a grip on your bare skin. “i-i’ll stop if it’s—”

“don’t you dare.” you moan, throwing your head back to allow him better access. “if you stop now, i’ll never forgive you.”

“noted.” jeno mumbles the word against your jugular, letting his teeth scrape your skin before sucking over the spot. a guttural moan slips from your mouth as a shock runs through you, and you can feel the smirk on jeno’s lips as he licks over the mark he’s made.

the fabric of jeno’s shirt is soft to the touch when you gather it in your fists, tugging on it enough to get jeno’s attention. “take it off.” you say in a low voice, your eyes locking with jeno’s as he pulls away from your neck. “doctor’s orders.”

a groan rolls out from the back of jeno’s throat. “god, that’s so fucking hot.” he mutters, kissing you once more. “in a totally respectful and non-objectifying way.”

you laugh into the kiss, tugging on the hem of his shirt again. “mhmm. just take it off, will you?”

jeno’s hands replace your own as he tugs his shirt over his head, letting it drop to the floor before attempting to kiss you again. you, however, had other plans, and begins to run your hands down jeno’s chest.

“i’ve wanted to do this for weeks.” you murmur, tracing your fingers over his bare skin. “so handsome…” you scratch your nail over jeno’s chest, adoring how his eyelids flutter at the feeling.

“that feels so…” jeno closes his eyes completely, letting his head rest on the back of the couch to fully lose himself in your touches. “keep going.”

you lean in and kiss his neck again, spreading the pecks all along his collar bones and shoulders while your fingers continue to trace the contours of jeno’s body. you work them over his chest, grazing over his nipples just enough to make his body jump beneath you.

jeno’s eyes open, and the tenderness in his dark eyes is unmistakable.

you knew that your eyes match the tenderness in jeno’s, and you kiss him once more before continuing to move your hand lower. you trace your finger over the buckle of his belt as your teeth tug on jeno’s lip lightly.

“can i?” you ask gently, your breath blowing across his lips. “please?”

jeno strokes your cheek, letting the back of his knuckles drag across your skin. you lean into his touch wholeheartedly, wanting jeno to know that you’ve never once been afraid of his hands and what they can do.

“is it the doctor’s orders?” jeno asks, his teasing tone disguising the need in his voice.

you let out a light laugh, and it’s then that you knew that you and jeno are meant to be. when two people can be so intimate together while still laughing and giggling and teasing each other…you knew that was something good, despite never having it before.

“yes.” you work your hand over his belt, and the only sounds in the room are each others’ labored breathing and the gentle clinking of the metal buckle. when it’s finally free, you busied yourself with the button and zipper of his jeans.

“wait.” jeno grasps your wrist carefully, stopping you before you can attempt to pull his jeans down. “i didn’t—i came here to take care of you.” he murmurs as he pushes your hands away. his own hands move to your thighs, grasping them tightly before picking you up with ease. you gasped, your hands flying to his shoulders as jeno carries you to your bed, laying you down gently on the mussed sheets.

“let me take care of you.” he repeats the sentiment as his hands move to the hem of your hoodie, slowly and carefully removing the article of clothing, along with the tank top underneath. you knew that his pace was intentional, giving you plenty of time to refuse, but stopping jeno was the last thing you wanted to do.

when your top is off, the first thing jeno does is kiss you. he moves you carefully as he does, so your head is supported by your pillows.

before you can gather yourself enough to give a retort, his mouth is on your breast.

with your hands immediately tangling in jeno’s hair, you let out another whine in sync with your tugging.

although you didn’t have your eyes on the boxer, you can feel the smirk that’s on his face, and just knew that he’s adoring the way that you’re reacting to him. while there’s a small part of you that’s irritated at his smugness, there’s a bigger part of you telling you to react more. moan more. pull his hair more. anything to make him happy.

you want to make him happy.

while his mouth works over one breast, his hand works over the other. jeno’s ring covered fingers tweak your nipple, tugging and twisting just enough to work more whimpers out of you.  when his teeth graze one nipple at the same time that he tugs on the other, you drag the nails of one hand down jeno’s warm back, and it quickly becomes your turn to delight in the whine that leaves his mouth.

it almost becomes a competition then, with both of you working to see who can make the other moan more. jeno switches his mouth to your other breast while you alternate between tugging on his hair and pushing your hand down the waistband of his jeans, your fingers rubbing over his defined hip bones. the competition, however, yields no winners, and is quickly forgotten in the pursuit of pulling the other closer, touching the other harder, dragging the other deeper into the safe space you’ve both created on your bed.

when jeno lets your nipple fall out of his mouth, his lips are bright red, shining with saliva almost as much as his eyes are shining with lust. you quickly pull him up to kiss you, and fingers a strand of his hair as you take a shaking breath.

jeno brushes a thumb over your cheekbone, delighting in the heat he feels beneath his fingers.

you move from under him and reach over to your bedside table, opening the drawer and pulling out a condom. your fingers pause over the lube, remembering the last time that you had used it with jeno, and you can’t help the smile that flickers over your face as you held up the bottle. “remember this?”

jeno laughs breathlessly as he rubs his eyes. “don’t remind me. i was a fucking mess that night.”

“a bit, but i didn’t mind.” you placed the lube back in the drawer before shutting it. “that was the night that i knew i wanted you.”

“was it?” jeno raises an eyebrow, you smile and shrug your shoulders before ripping the condom packaging with your teeth, retrieving the latex disc from inside. jeno quickly removes his pants, and you pump him once before sliding the condom on, making sure that it’s positioned correctly.

you throw your leg over him, straddling his lower stomach as you lean down to kiss him.  the tone between you both fade into one of lust and affection and need as jeno’s lips move against yours, and you’re both panting when you pull away to press your forehead against his.

“are you comfortable like this?” you ask, worry seeping into your tone. “i know your ribs are still bothering you a bit, so i figured that this would be—”

jeno cuts you off with another kiss, this one wilder and more passionate than the last. “i’m fine, y/n. you don’t have to worry about me.” he says, despite the flutter in his stomach at the idea of you worrying about him.

“i always worry, jeno.” you reach underneath to grip his cock, rubbing the tip of it over your slit as you balance yourself with one hand on his pelvis. jeno’s hands grip your hips to give you more stability. “you’re so—fuck—reckless that it drives me—” you gasp loudly as you begin to sink down on jeno’s cock. “insane.”

jeno’s first instinct at the feeling of your warm walls hugging his cock is to throw his head back, close his eyes, and let the pleasure take over. however, he uses every ounce of willpower he has to do the opposite, and thanks god that he does, because he gets to see you take his cock for the first time.

your entire body is flushed, and you knew that the heat practically rolling off of you is because of jeno. everything that you’re feeling, from the fullness in your core that extends to your stomach, to the fluttering of your body, to the overwhelming sense of something just being right, is all because of jeno.

after giving yourself a moment to adjust to his size, you begin to move. jeno helps guide your hips up and down slowly, and you decide from the first moment that you’re going to take your time building up your speed. you wanted this to last.

you know that jeno has the capacity to fuck you. you know that, if you asked, he’d flip you over and bend you over the edge of the bed and fuck you as fast as he possibly could until you screamed his name. but, as much as the thought intrigues you, that’s not what you want right now. there will be time for fucking later, you think. there will be time for loud moans and teeth clicking together and bruises in the shape of a lover’s hand left on thighs and necks. right now, all you want is to feel every inch of jeno inside of you, and to listen to his quiet yet desperate moans as you gradually increase your pace.

with one of his hands still guiding your hips, jeno gently grips the back of your neck, pulling your chest down to press against his. both of your lips find each other quickly, kissing and nipping as you feel yourself beginning to fall apart.

“jeno.” you breathe against his lips. “i’m so close…” a choked moan stumbles out of your mouth as jeno’s hand shifts from your neck to your clit, rubbing small circles with two nimble fingers.

“i can feel it.” jeno’s breath is hot on your ear as he presses open mouthed kisses to your neck. “can feel you squeezing me…”

you bite your lip hard, almost enough to draw blood as the movement of your hips begins to stutter. “i-i want you to—jeno—” you dig your nails into his shoulder when jeno’s fingers speed up, and within a moment, an orgasm sending shockwaves through your body.

jeno can tell the moment it happens, and a grunt leaves his throat as he begins to lift his hips to meet your movements. he buries his face into your neck, inhaling the scent of your perfume and sweat that’s more intoxicating than anything else he’s ever smelled. “fuck, y/n—” his words cut off in a strangled moan as your walls squeeze his sensitive member.

although you’ve barely come down from your high, you take it upon yourself to guide jeno through his orgasm like he’s done for you. one of your hands moves from his marked shoulder to his hair, pushing the sweaty strands back from his eyes in a repeated motion as you murmur in his ear. “let go, jeno…feels so good…” you can feel the jerking of his hips as he finishes inside the condom, and for a split second, you wished that there wasn’t a barrier of latex between the two of you, despite knowing that protection is mandatory.

you wait until jeno’s managed to catch his breath before you carefully climb down from him, missing the feeling of him inside you the moment you’re empty. you lie down on your rumpled sheets next to his exhausted body, and hope that you look just as pretty in your post-sex haze as jeno.

now that you’ve begun to touch him, you can’t stop. your hands continue to rub tenderly over his sweat-soaked chest, feeling the thumping beat of his heart beneath you as jeno carefully removes and ties off the used condom.  although a small grumble leaves your when he gets up to throw it away, you can’t help but smile when he returns with two glasses of water in his hands.

“here.” jeno hands you a glass before getting back on the bed, situating his naked form back into the position he was in a moment ago. “you need to hydrate. doctor’s orders.”

you let out a breathless laugh before taking a sip of the cool liquid. “so you’re the doctor now, huh?”

“god, no. i’m not nearly as smart as you. i’m just smart enough to remember what you tell me.” jeno gulps down his own glass, setting it on the bedside table once it’s empty. his arms then move to encircle your body, pulling your chests together so your weight lies on top of him.

you don’t miss the small wince that the movement causes, and you set your own glass down before moving back to your position next to him. “you need to be more careful.” you murmur, resuming your motion of rubbing over his chest. you’re not sure why the motion is so soothing, but you don’t fight it, loving the feeling of jeno’s warm skin beneath your hand. “johnny won’t forgive me if i put his best fighter out of commission.”

“no, he probably won’t.” jeno muses, settling for wrapping one arm around your body. “he might fire you.”

“and then who will clean up your messes?” you cock an eyebrow teasingly. “or clean you up, when you’re a mess?”

“i’d just have to stumble my way to your apartment in the middle of the night again.” a laugh rumbles deep in jeno’s chest. “and then after you bandage me up, we can have a quick round. it’ll be a nice routine.”

you roll your eyes. “mhmm. nice try.”

jeno’s laughter trails off after a moment as his fingers begin to trace shapes on your back. “seriously, though…” his eyes grow sober. “how do you want to…handle this?”

you bite your lip. “how do you want to handle this?”

a sigh leaves jeno’s lips. “i want…you. i want you to be mine. and i don’t want to hide it, but if you feel like that’s best, then…”

“it’s just—i don’t know. it’s complicated.” your eyes focus on the way his chest rise and falls as he breathes. “yeah. complicated.”

“you’re nervous about johnny knowing.” jeno states simply.

you nod. “he specifically told me not to get involved with any boxers. he said that…no good men come there.”

jeno’s hand moves over his jaw, scratching lightly. “yeah. he wasn’t wrong.”

his answer bothers you, and you move to sit up more in bed, making him look you in the eyes. “you’re a good man, jeno. i know that.”

“i’m not.” jeno shakes his head once, his voice growing rougher. “i have a lot of shit that i’m…trying to work through. i’m not that good.” when he sees how your face shifts at his words, his tone changes. “but i’d never…that has nothing to do with you. any of my issues, my pride, my anger, anything like that, it’s all—it’s separate from you.” he cups your cheek gently. “i’d never hurt you.”

“i know that, jeno.” you repeat as you place your hand over his, weaving both of your fingers together. “i trust you. i just wish you’d trust yourself.”

“i trust myself more when i’m with you.” jeno admits. “i’ve never really felt…regret for what i’ve done. the ring is an equal playing field, right? but that night when you said you thought i was too harsh…”

you bite your lip. “did that bother you?”

“i was worried i scared you off.” his eyes close for a moment as he remembers. “i thought…i don’t know. i thought you already disliked me just for being a boxer, and now i’m the boxer that breaks bones, and there’s no way you’d ever want to be around me.”

“i probably shouldn’t want it.” you admit. “when you phrase it like that. but i’ve told you before…you’re different when you’re with me.”

“only with you. only for you.” jeno’s voice grows tender as he holds you close to him. “so if you want to keep it private, i understand. i just want you to be mine.”

your finger brushes over one of jeno’s rings. it’s a beautifully sculpted silver rose, and there’s something so wonderful to you in how jeno chooses to wear flowers on the hands that have done so much damage.

you twist the ring around his finger before pulling it off. it’s too big to fit on your ring or middle finger, so after a moment of consideration, you slip it onto your thumb. “then i’m yours.”

jeno’s eyes darken at the sight of you with his ring on your finger. “yeah. you’re mine.”

the feeling of jeno’s ring on your finger makes you feel so complete, and you want to share it with him, so you ignore jeno’s whine of protest as you climb out of bed to walk to your dresser. a little ceramic dish with your jewelry in it sits on top, and you sort through the rings and bracelets before setting on something that he can wear while in the ring. you cup it in your palms before returning to bed, an excited but shy smile on your face.

“here.” you place it in jeno’s hand. “you can put this on your chain with your cross.”

the silver caduceus looks small in jeno’s palm, and he brings it closer to his eyes to examine it. “what is it?”

“it’s a caduceus. it’s the medical symbol, the one i wear on my jacket to the ring.” you explain, your cheeks feeling warm at your words. “it’s from greek mythology, but doctors adopted it, and—yeah. just something to show that…you’re mine, too.”

a small smile plays on the corner of jeno’s lips. “will you put it on me?”

you nod, and although your fingers are shaking a bit, you manage to undo the clasp on jeno’s chain, and slips the pendant on before refastening it around his neck. you settle the caduceus and cross pendants on his chest.

“it looks pretty on you.” you murmur, your hand brushing down his abdomen. “really nice.”

“it’ll be my good luck charm in the ring.” jeno brings your hand to his mouth, kissing over the rose ring. “i won’t take it off, as long as you don’t take my ring off. deal?”

“deal.” you lay your head back down on jeno’s chest. “now get some sleep. doctor’s orders.”

a playful groan falls out of jeno’s mouth. “is that going to be a new thing? are you going to get me to do everything by saying it’s doctor’s orders?”

“i wouldn’t have to if you took better care of yourself.” you match his playful tone. “but we both know that you have a tendency to ignore your instincts—”

“my instincts are good!”

“like your instinct to fight with a sprained hand was good?”

the corner of jeno’s mouth twitches. “fine. let’s go to sleep.”

sunlight is beginning to spill through the curtains as jeno closes his eyes, bathing his entire face in a golden glow. his skin glows under the light, save for the purplish bruise that rings one of his eyes. you press a gentle kiss to the darkened area before settling yourself down in jeno’s arms.

TAGLIST — @voucearse @suhkissed @yeoreobun @saranghoeforanton @lovesuhng @bluedbliss @notmastyle @untitledtyun @snapcracklen @dior-15 @jm1655 @bebskyy @hi00000234567

pairing — idol!jongseob x fem!reader

genre — fluff, sleeping!seob, established relationship

you blink slowly, barely awake as your phone lights up a little after midnight, and you don’t even need to check the name—you already know it’s him. only jongseob calls this late, when everything’s quiet and he can finally rest in his hotel room after a long day. you pick up, and his face fills the screen, his hair a mess and a blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

“you’re still awake?” you whisper, even though it’s just you two.

he smiles, small and tired. “i was gonna ask you the same thing.”

you laugh softly and shift under your own covers, propping your phone against your pillow so you don’t have to hold it. his voice is lower at night—warm and comforting. he rambles about practice, about how he thinks one of the cats outside their dorm has been following him, about how he ate too fast at dinner and got hiccups in front of everyone. it’s nothing special, but you listen to every drowsy little word.

“you should sleep early,” he says eventually, though his eyelids are already heavy.

“you first,” you whisper back.

there’s a pause, and then he huffs a little laugh, but it sounds more like air than anything. “you just don’t listen, huh?”

his words start getting slower, softer. sometimes he stops mid sentence, like he forgets where he’s going. you keep talking just enough to keep him with you, asking him little things. what song’s been stuck in his head, if he found that hoodie he lost, if he misses you. he answers, but his voice gets quieter each time.

“seob?” you murmur after a while, when the silence stretches for too long.

the camera angle tilts a little as he shifts, but he doesn’t answer. his lashes rest against his cheeks, lips parted, breathing steady. he’s passed out.

you should probably hang up, but you don’t. instead you stay there with your screen glowing in the dark, watching the way he unconsciously curls closer to his pillow, blanket tucked under his chin. it feels almost too intimate, like you’ve slipped into a part of him only you get to see.

by the time your own eyes close, the call is still running.

the next morning, there’s a text waiting for you:

“wifi cut out last night lol.”

you send back the screenshot you took, his face soft in sleep, mouth slightly open.

“wifi, huh?”

it takes him three minutes to reply.

“…okay fine. maybe i just like falling asleep with you on the other side.”