Luo Binghe: Shizun, it's been 5 years. I missed you
Shen Qingqiu, screaming internally: please don't kill me, please don't kill me, please don't kill me, fuck, fuck, he's going to fucking kill me
~~~
Lan Wangji: Wei Ying, it's been 13 years. I missed you
Wei Wuxian: Huh? Wei Ying? I never heard of the guy. Did you not see me flirting with men? I bet Wei Ying has never done that
~~~
Hua Cheng: Dianxia, it's been 800 years. I missed you
Xie Lian: Do I know you?
Hua Cheng: ...
Hua Cheng: No.
~~~
Bonus
Mobei-Jun: Qinghua, it's been a month. I missed y-
Shang Qinghua: HOLY SHIT MY KING, YOUR UNCLE IS GOING TO KILL ME!!

















