Marauder Misprint

Since James hadn’t brought it up, you assumed he was waiting until after exams to do it. He’d leave you behind with all his other school memories. You could picture it. 

Getting off the train together. He’d look at you and say this is where your paths split. He’ll see you if he sees you. He’d hold out his hand to shake yours but you’d be too shattered to. So he’d click his tongue, ran a hand through his hair and walk away. 

Frankly, you didn’t know which was worse. Him ending things right as you graduate or trying long distance only to break up two months in. If he did it at graduation, you’d be starting a fresh new life. If you tried long distance and then broke up, you’d be mourning the relationship in a still fairly new place, but at least you could say that you tried. 

You took a shaky breath at the thought of it. It was really horrible no matter how you spun. Ending your relationship with James was going to suck, especially since everything was so well with him. 

A gentle hand rested on your upper arm. 

“Hey, love, are you okay?” James asked softly. 

You rubbed at your eyes, not sure when you had started crying. Your Herbology notes in front of you had a few tear splotches. You’d be more embarrassed if you hadn’t seen other seventh years stress-cry in the library in the past. You sniffled. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

James pulled out a chair and sat next to you, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. 

“You know I can help you study, right? I don’t have to be in Herbology to help.”

“It’s-“ You sniffed again and wiped your nose. “It’s not that.”

“Can I ask what it is then? What’s bothering you?”

It was probably because you were already crying and upset that you asked, “Are you breaking up with me?”

James stared at you silently with wide eyes. So many things started running through his mind, like what on earth had he done to make you think that. Was he being distant? Distracted? Lazy? Simply uninterested? He certainly wasn’t uninterested in you. 

“No! Merlin, no!” James said, reaching to hold your hands. “Where are you getting that idea?” He paused before adding tentatively, “Unless you want to break up?”

A new wave of sadness crashed over you. 

“I… You never brought up what happens to us after school.”

That. James felt his heart pound in his chest. It hadn’t quite hit him that his time at Hogwarts was coming to an end and quickly too. Part of it wasn’t going to be too bad. He was going to live with Remus, Peter, and Sirius for at least the first year after. None of them could afford a place on their own. 

But then there was you, and the topic you just breached. He didn’t want to think about not being able to see you every day. You could maybe talk through those muggle devices you and Remus talked about, or with the floo network. But he wasn’t sure how reliable either of those were. Plus, only talking was nothing compared to snuggling on a couch and simply being together. 

James swallowed thickly. 

“I know.”

You knew what was coming next. The I don’t think it’s going-

“It’s not because I think we’re going to break up. Kind of the opposite?”

Your miserable expression softened into something more confused. 

“I don’t want to think about how much I’m going to miss you. Counting down days until I’ll get to see you again is going to be horrible. I know we’ll be able to visit each other, but it just doesn’t compare to seeing you every day.” He took a breath. “I didn’t bring it up because talking about it makes it real. And it means that it’s not just something we’ll deal with when it gets here. Because it is here.”

“So you’re okay with being long distance?” you asked. 

“I mean, okay is a strong word here, love. But there’s not really any real, other option so I’ll suffer through it.”

“What if it’s too hard? You say that-“

“That’s not possible. I stopped imagining my future without you in it. So yes, it’s going to be bloody horrible, but we’ll get through it.” He squeezed your hands. “No matter what happens, no matter how much distance there is between us, it’s you and me. We got this.”

You wanted to laugh, so you leaned in to kiss James instead. You had been so worried about James breaking up with and he didn’t even consider that to be an option. 

“Now that we have that cleared up,” James said when you pulled back. “Do you want help studying your plants or do you want to take a break and go for a walk?”

—-

Months later, you had barely stepped out of the muggle taxi when Sirius came sprinting out of the house. He practically tackled you in a hug.

“Oh, thank Merlin, you’re here. He won’t shut up. Please go make him shut up!” 

You laughed. “It’s good to see you too, Sirius.” 

“Go in,” he said, letting you go and giving you a light push. “I’ll get your bags.”

James was splayed out over their sofa. 

“She should be here by now,” he moaned. 

Remus grinned when he saw you walk through the front door. Apparently Sirius hadn’t announced that you had arrived when he ran out to greet you. 

“Expecting someone else?” you asked with a cheeky smile.

James sat up with the brightest expression. He jumped off of the couch and did the same thing Sirius did, pulling you into the tightest bear hug he could. You hugged him back, breathing in his scent and sighing. You had missed this. And him. 

“You’re never allowed to leave,” he mumbled into your hair. “You’re staying here forever.”

“I wish.”

He hummed. “You will one day. Come home to you, instead of Peter’s arse on full display.”

You leaned back from James and did a quick scan for Peter. 

“None of that while I’m here!”

“I’m going home tomorrow,” he said nonchalantly. 

Sirius placed your bags on the floor and dramatically collapsed into an open seat at the table next to Remus. 

“She’s here and you can quit moaning,” he said. Then you could see a thought cross his mind and he grimaced. “And I beg of you, please remember that the walls are thin and my room is right to James’!”

James just laughed and picked up the bags. 

“Come on! I’ll give you the tour!”

“You can just go join their conversation. They’re your friends,” Remus pointed out after noticing that Sirius kept looking your way and sometimes it edged on being considered staring. 

“What would I say?”

Remus laughed. “Something relevant to their conversation? Mate, come off it!”

So, after wiping his hands on his jeans and taking a deep breath, Sirius walked over to you and Emmeline. He casually put his arm around your shoulder. It was Sirius so it could almost be seen as a friendly notion. 

“Ladies,” he said with an effortlessly cool air. Even nervous, he could pull it off.

“Black,” Emmeline said, although she wasn’t looking at him. 

Her eyes were glued on you as she grinned. You knew you were blushing with how warm your face had gotten. Emmeline knew about your crush on Sirius. She also knew that you weren’t going to do anything about it because of what seemed to be his one downside: the boy didn’t date. He flirted, hooked up, and maybe hung around for a week, but it always stopped there. Sirius didn’t do relationships. So you were going to wait for this crush to fizzle out and hope the next boy to unknowingly steal your heart was more interested in being yours. Or someone’s, at least.

“Enjoying yourselves?” 

“Gryffindor parties never disappoint,” you said. 

“Brilliant. Can’t have pretty girls giving us bad reviews. It would ruin our reputation!”

“Oh, don’t think too high of yourself. Can’t imagine you pulled this all off by yourself,” you said. 

Sirius scoffed and pulled slightly away from you. You hated how you wished he hadn’t. 

“I got all the drinks.” He pointed at your cup. “That’d be empty! You’d be parched!”

“Then I suppose,” you said before taking a small sip. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” he said. 

He let his arm fall completely from your shoulder as Emmeline started talking about Flitwick’s essay assignment. Sirius looked at you more often than not. When Emmeline finished her drink, she said she was going to get another one, but she didn’t come back, leaving you alone with Sirius. 

“So, you been good lately?” Sirius asked. 

He immediately kicked himself mentally. What kind of question was that? Petty small talk. That wouldn’t get him where he wanted to go. 

But you laughed and that made him smile. Laughter was good. 

“Like we don’t see each other every day?”

“I don’t ask you every day.” He leaned a little closer to you. “I should though.”

“That sounds like a line.”

“A line?”

“Yeah. Like does that help you get girls?”

“Wouldn’t know. Cause it’s not a line,” Sirius said. He was a little offended you thought he’d use a line on you. You deserved so much more than a cheesy line.

“So this isn’t how you usually do it though? Join a conversation, casually toss in a compliment, wait until you’re alone and then drop a line that you hope earns you a good snog?” 

Part of you hated yourself for saying that. That part wouldn’t mind being a good snog. The rest of you, however, doesn’t want to be just another girl that Sirius has kissed, another notch in his belt. 

“I mean, I’m not saying no if you want to snog me,” Sirius said, putting his hands up in defense. He’d be jumping at the opportunity to kiss you.

“Right,” you laughed as you crossed your arms. “Listen, I have self-respect so I’m going to pass.”

You walked past Sirius to find Emmeline with a determination to stay next to her side for the rest of the night. If she wanted to make out with someone, you’d go back to your dorm. Sirius watched you walk away and felt his chest tighten. The girl of his dreams walked away from him. 

“Why’re you here? What happened with-“ Emmeline started to ask. 

“He just wants a girl. You know,” you said, raising your eyebrows, and she nodded. 

You and Emmeline eventually went back to your dorms, and Sirius stayed by Remus’ side for the rest of the night. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to do about you. He didn’t want to give up so easily. If you thought he only wanted you because you were at a party, maybe he still had a chance. Maybe he just needed to tell you that he didn’t just want you, he wanted to be with you. To date you. To be yours. 

The next time Sirius saw you was in class on Monday. He listened to his own suggestion. He asked how you were. You didn’t think anything of it until he had done it every day and he found you after the last class of the day ended. 

“Y/N, what would you say to going to Hogsmeade?” he asked. 

Each day asking you how you were or how you slept or how your first lesson was made Sirius slightly less nervous talking to you. These were small conversations with just you that he hadn’t had many of before he realized that he wanted to. After a week of them, he honestly thought you’d understand that he wasn’t looking for someone to pass the time with. 

But you didn’t. 

“Who else is going?” you asked as you shifted your bag strap. 

“Jus’ you and me.”

You sighed. It pulled your heart in two different directions. 

“I already told you, Sirius. I have no interest in being just a girl you snog.”

Maybe if you hadn’t immediately walked away, Sirius could have explained that he didn’t want you to be just a girl he snogged either. 

He didn’t stop asking you how you were. He tried to get you to see that he was actually interested in you. He sat by you when he could. You had conversations that were more than small talk. You didn’t push him away. You looked comfortable. So he tried asking you to Hogsmeade again, only to be told that you weren’t going to be used so he could get off. 

Really, you loved and hated how much time Sirius had been spending with you. You were getting to know him better. And it only made you like him more. That meant that your heart broke a little bit more every time he invited you somewhere, just the two of you. It was a cruel reminder of who he was. A player who broke every girl’s heart.

A small group had congregated at the table you were studying at with Emmeline. It started with Remus asking Emmeline a question on an Astronomy assignment. Then Sirius and James followed. Sirius sat next to you as always. Some of your friends stopped by some time later and said some fourth years were having a “proper muggle fight” outside of Greenhouse #4. 

James and Remus jumped up to leave with your friends. The boys were practically sprinting. Emmeline gave you a half-amused look. 

“I suppose I’m going to check it out too. Maybe I’ll hold a prefect back, depending who’s out there,” she said with a laugh before leaving. 

It was just you and Sirius at the table now. 

“You’re not going?” you asked. 

He shook his head. “Doesn’t interest me when you got an Ancient Runes test tomorrow.”

“You have the same test.”

“And I’m ready for it. You, my dear, are not.”

“If you’re ready for the test, why aren’t you watching some boys beat the shit out of each other?”

“I, um, I was going to help you study.”

“You think helping me study is more entertaining than muggle fighting?”

“Merlin, no. But I love you and I want you to do well,” Sirius said, not fully realizing what he said until he said it. His face turned red and he suddenly couldn’t meet your eyes.

“What do you mean… by… that?” you asked slowly. “That you love me?”

He laughed nervously and rubbed his knuckles. 

“What I’ve been trying to get across to you for a while now?” he said, looking up at the ceiling. Then he brought himself to look at you. “You keep saying that you’re not someone I can kiss and leave, right? And I agree. I don’t want to leave.”

“Come again?” What Sirius just said didn’t make much sense to you. 

“Do you think I’d be sitting here if I didn’t love you?” he asked, sounding a little exasperated. “Everyone is going to be talking about those idiots and I can only imagine it’s bloody hilarious. And I’m in here. With you. Because it’s the closest thing to a date I can get with you right now and that’s all I want. I mean, I also want to kiss you, but I swear it’s more than that.”

“A date? Like an actual date? With me?”

“Yes! I want to take you to Hogsmeade so I can walk around your shops with you and buy you whatever you want, and then we’d walk back to the castle together. I want you to be sitting next to me at lunch. I want to be here, studying with you whenever you’re stressed about the next exam. I want to be inviting you to the Potters’ during the summer. I want to be your boyfriend, but I think you think I don’t actually want that.”

“My boyfriend? Sirius Black wants to be someone’s boyfriend?”

“Not someone’s. Yours. I want to be your boyfriend.”

“Then this our first date? Studying for an exam that I’m going to fail?”

“Please, I’m not going to have my girlfriend fail an exam,” Sirius laughed, feeling as if a huge weight had been lifted off of him. 

He draped it over your shoulders and you slid your arms through the sleeves. It was like second nature. You adjusted it and smiled at Remus. 

“Cozy!” you chirped. 

“I know. Why do you think I bought it?”

“Thank youuu,” you said, gently bumping into him. 

“Anytime, love.”

Marlene, Mary, James, Sirius, and Peter were singing some quidditch chant. You and Remus talked about the okay-ish music in the last bar, although Remus did note that you seemed to be enjoying yourself.

A few streets later, you asked, “How far away is this pla-AH!”

Remus tried to catch you as you tripped, but he wasn’t quick enough. You hit the pavement and swore extensively. There was a sharp pain in your ankle.

“You alright?” Sirius asked, turning around to see you on the ground and Remus crouching down to assess the damage. 

“Ow,” you said. 

You sat up slowly and rolled your ankle. 

“I don’t think I’m going to make it,” you said as your ankle throbbed with growing pain. Tears were beginning to form in your eyes. 

Remus looked from you to your friends and back to you. 

“My place isn’t too far from here. D’you want to head there until you sober up a bit?” Remus offered. 

Remus’ place was small and it wasn’t really set up for people spending the night, unlike the Potters’. You nodded. You could rest on his couch and take the floo home when you felt like you could stand without passing out.. 

“Alright. Arm around my shoulder, and one, two, three, up!”

“You’re sure you’re good?” Lily asked with a concerned look on her face. 

“Yeah, yeah. Just no more dancing for me tonight.” You tried to put some weight on your ankle and winced. “Or for a while.” You chuckled softly. “I’ll make it to Lupin’s fine.”

The group said bye to you two and continued to Peter’s bar. You started slowly towards Remus’. 

“I think I have some wrap. Ice, at least.”

“And a couch,” you said. “A good couch for laying down. Because the world seems a little spin-y right now.”

Remus chuckled. “We’ll get you some water too.”

“Oh, water is good. And some acetaminophen. That good muggle shit.”

“I got that, don’t you worry your pretty little head.”

You giggled, and then groaned, “Ow!”

“Almost… there…”

Remus unlocked his front door and helped you in and to the couch. He got you the medicine and water he promised you. He briefly looked for wrap and then wrapped up your ankle until it was stiff. Then he sat down next to you. 

“You’re the greatest,” you sighed. “What would I do without you?”

“Lay on the ground and wait for someone else to help you up.”

“True,” you laughed and rested your head on his shoulder. “This is why I’m pretty sure I’m in love with you.”

Remus stiffened slightly. “You’re in love with me?” he whispered. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to hear you say that. You’d said it many times in his dreams. This was real. Well, possibly real, given how much you’d had to drink. 

“How can I not? You’re like my best mate all through school. You’re hot. Sweet. You feel like home. This-” You gestured around his flat. “-is so you and I love being here, with you. And, you know, I love you. Obviously, I don’t expect you to say it back. It’s just hitting me that sitting here with you is so much more better than drinking overpriced drinks and dancing without you.”

You could feel Remus soften under your head. 

“I wish I had danced with you,” he whispered. 

“Promise me you’ll dance with me when I’m able to?”

Remus didn’t answer right away. The gears in his head were turning. 

“How about this…” 

He pulled his wand out of his pocket and waved it at the turntable by his window. It crackled to life and a soft tune started playing. Remus stood up, held out a hand for you, and helped you up. He placed your arms around his neck before putting his hands on your waist.

“Just don’t put weight on that foot, okay?”

You leaned up and kissed his cheek. “Okay.”

He assumed it was something silly. If you liked that book you were reading, and if he waited until the weekend, you would have finished it and moved onto the next one. If you wanted to sneak into Hogsmeade early to get first dibs on Honeyduke’s newest shipment. If you thought one shirt was better than another for your next date. 

“It’s not important,” James said, speaking too quickly to be the truth. 

“Then why before this weekend?”

Peter narrowed his eyes. 

“So I don’t chicken out. I'm an adult. I can ask my girlfriend questions.”

Peter didn’t run to tell everyone right away. He would tell Remus and Sirius later. 

“James is going to ask Y/N to marry him soon.”

“Soon?” Sirius asked. 

Peter nodded. 

“And he used those exact words?” Remus added. 

“Well, no, but what other adult question would he ask his girlfriend? And yes, he did emphasize the girlfriend part.”

One thing led to another and Marlene cornered you in the Transfiguration Courtyard. 

“Are you going to say yes?” she asked, rather forcefully in your opinion.

“To what?” 

She inhaled deeply. “Oh, you haven’t heard.”

“Heard what?” You had been slightly disinterested but now you were curious. 

“I swear it’s all the common room is talking about. Potter. He wants to marry you.”

Your wide-eyed expression was only a fraction of the shock that you felt. Yes, your relationship with James was fantastic. You loved him. But marriage hadn’t explicitly come up yet in any conversation. There had been conversations about the future, but those tended to be more of what you wanted out of life. You were so young. You still called yourself a child at times. You knew James loves to jump into things with both feet, hence why he kissed you on your first date, but he knew you took your time with things, why your second kiss was three official dates after. 

“What?” you repeated. 

“Peter heard him say he’s gonna ask soon.”

“Soon?” You quickly gathered your few things around you, fumbling with them as you did so. “Um, excuse me. I’ll talk to you… later.”

You hurried inside the castle and tried to escape the uneasy feeling in your stomach. James had been so considerate with how you approached love. After that first kiss, you couldn’t look at him. He found some time alone with you to figure out why and once he understood that he went way too fast, he promised he’d go your speed if you gave him a second chance. He kept that promise. Until now, apparently. 

Your feet took you around the clock tower. You knew you can’t go back to the common room. James would be there. So you kept walking until you ended up by the quidditch supply shed. You laughed at yourself. It was a shaky laugh, but still a laugh. 

Where else would you go to think about your relationship with James than the spot the two of you had claimed as yours. It had been the place where you had your first one-on-one interaction with him. You had fallen off your broom during flying lessons. It wasn’t far enough to hurt yourself, but your ego was more than bruised. You ran. And a few minutes later, James was sent to find you. Find you he did, but he also comforted you. Years later, the spot would be where he asked you out for the first time. James and Sirius were adamant to get their land-loving friends in the air, and when they were done, everyone skipped out on putting the broom away except for you and James. He’d later tell you that it had been planned that way. From there, it was your spot. 

You sat down, lost in your thoughts. You played with the grass as you tried to figure out how James thought proposing to you while still at school was a good idea. You couldn’t. You threw a handful of grass at the ground. 

You didn’t notice when the sun went down. You stood up, brushed yourself off and headed back to the castle and the common room. You knew you missed dinner and without knowing the exact time, you might be pushing curfew. The moment you walked through the portrait, James saw you. 

“Y/N! You missed dinner!” he said, standing up and starting to cross the room.

“I-I know. ‘M not hungry,” you said hurriedly. 

You picked up your pace and practically ran up the stairs to your dorm. James furrowed his brows. Then he went for the portrait hole. 

“Potter, where you going?” Peter called from the other side of the room. 

“Kitchens. Not hungry my ass…”

You almost cried when a fifth year knocked on your door and said James asked her to bring something to you. That something being food. How were you supposed to tell this boy that you couldn’t marry him?

Marlene must’ve said something to the girls because no one mentioned James when they came into the dorm. 

In the morning, you laid in bed as long as you could. That was James’ first clue that something was off. Not being at breakfast at your usual time and skipping dinner? You must be ill. 

Then you were deliberately avoiding him. You didn’t walk with him to classes, usually bolting around a corner or into the nearest loo. James tried to brush it off as you not feeling well. But you didn’t say a word to him. Well, you weren’t really speaking to anyone much, but he was your boyfriend so he assumed he ranked higher than others. 

Lunch came and went. You grabbed something to eat and disappeared. 

At least she’s eating, he thought. 

The afternoon was like the morning and after the last class ended, you were gone again. James was worried at this point. He started looking for you. Common room. Great Hall. Library. Asked Lily if you were in your dorm. 

He ran a hand through his hair and adjusted his glasses. How could he forget? He went outside to the quidditch supply shed and there you were, sitting on the ground with all your school supplies next to you as you twirled a blade of grass in your hand. 

“Hey,” he said softly before taking too many steps closer. “I’ve been looking for you.”

Your stomach dropped. You didn’t want him to ask now. You still hadn’t gotten your head wrapped around it. 

He sat down next to you. 

“How’re you feeling?”

“I-“ Your voice cracked. “I suppose I’ve been better…”

James frowned. You didn’t look sick, nor did you sound stuffy. You were a little pale, but that was probably from not eating enough. 

“Erm, I don’t know if it’ll help but I wanted to ask-“

“James, don’t,” you said with more strength than before. 

James stopped. If you had looked at his face, you would’ve seen utter confusion. His brain went to two options: either you wanted to be alone right now or you wanted to break up. He started to pray it was the former. 

“I know what you’re going to ask. And… I can’t. We can’t. We… we haven’t even graduated yet! I can’t marry you. We haven’t talked about it enough. There’s so many things that could happen. The what-ifs and details and little things of life that we can’t control. And I’m not ready. I still feel like a kid. That would make me a child-bride and I won’t let that happen. You’re a great bloke, James. You really are. And you’ve been a fantastic boyfriend and I do love you. But don’t ask me to marry you, because I can’t.”

James felt like a brick had been thrown at his face. That was not the question he was planning on asking. Not today at least. He wasn’t ready for marriage either. He agreed that you hadn’t talked about it enough. And even if you had, he would make sure it was a step you were ready to take. 

“I mean, one day I’d like to marry you. I just can’t, not right now. It’s too soon. So just don't ask right now so I don't have to say no.”

There were a few seconds of silence. 

Then James said, “I’d like to marry you too one day. But, erm, that wasn’t the question I was going to ask.”

Your face burned bright red as you looked up from the grass at James. 

“It wasn’t?”

“No. And I had a whole speech prepared, but I’ve forgotten all of it.” James ran a hand through his hair. “My dad helped me line up a flat for after school and I wanted to ask if you’d consider moving in with me.”

You gasped. 

“Obviously, I don’t need a yes or no right now. It’s just, I know you were planning on going to your parents’ until you figured something else out. So I’m offering something else.”

You grabbed James’ face and kissed him. He did keep his promise of taking things at your speed. 

“I think that’s a lovely idea,” you said.

The bartender stopped by and you gave him your order. He was quick to make it. 

“I think Sirius was curious to see if you’d come since you’re back.”

You nodded. “I wasn’t sure how much he follows quidditch.”

“His friend put on your interview,” Regulus said before tilting his glass at you. “You’ve made quite a stir.”

“They act like I’m the first player to go from a national team to the British-Irish league. Everyone knows it’s a better league.” You took a sip of your drink and added more casually, “Plus the pay’s better.”

“Don’t you get family money?”

You shook your head. 

“No. I think Mum officially cut me off when I joined the team.”

“Huh.”

A burst of loud laughter drew your attention farther into the bar. You recognized two of the loudest as they leaned on each other for support. Your brother looked the same as ever to you, besides more defined and filled out. Which wasn’t saying much as you didn’t see much of him after you turned fifteen. 

The other man was James Potter. You didn’t have the pleasure of going to school with him or knowing him personally. He had just finished his rookie season with the Caerphilly Catapults and, from what you heard, was working miracles for marketing and match attendance. He was objectively good and attractive, did well in interviews, and interacted brilliantly with fans in the clips you had seen. 

Regulus nudged you slightly. 

“You should say hi to Sirius before he finds you standing with me.”

“I assumed you were on good terms?”

“We are.”

Then Regulus turned and walked away from you. Clearly, your brothers were in better touch with each other than either was with you. You couldn’t blame them. You hadn’t put in much effort yourself. 

But you were here at Sirius’ invitation so the least you could do was wish him a happy birthday. You approached the boisterous group with a smile you hoped didn’t look as forced as it was. 

“Sirius,” you said. 

The conversation quieted but didn’t half. Most of the people around Sirius were looking at you with vague familiarity in their eyes. Obviously Sirius knew who you were, and it appeared James did too, along with a blonde girl. 

Sirius said your name with a warmth you didn’t expect. The vague familiarity shifted into surprise. 

“Happy birthday. And, erm, thanks for inviting me.”

“Figured it was a good enough excuse to try to get the three of us together.”

You raised your glass in a mini-toast. “You succeeded there.” You looked at the people around you. “School friends, I assume?”

One of the boys in the group opened his mouth to answer you when you heard a familiar voice. 

“Is that the newest Wasp?” Gideon Prewett asked as he walked over with his brother. 

“Prewett and Prewett. What a surprising duo,” you said. 

“Longbottom’s over there. You gotta tell us about the league switch,” Fabian said. 

“Sirius, we’ll catch up later, yeah?” you asked, looking back at your brother. 

“Assuming you don’t go back to France.”

“Wasn’t planning on it.”

You gave the group around Sirius a polite smile before following the twins to a table. The group was quiet for a few seconds. 

“So how did you get more than one Quidditch favorite here?” Mary asked. “D’you send an invite to every player out there?”

“If James isn’t drinking with me on my birthday, one of us is dead,” Sirius said, elbowing James. 

“And Noir over there?” Marlene asked. She had yet to look away from you as you sat with the Prewetts and Frank. 

Sirius let out a short laugh. “She was in the country for once.”

Between going to Beauxbatons and then immediately playing quidditch in France, you hadn’t been in England for a November since you were a child. You tried to remember to send Sirius a letter when his birthday came around. 

“Black, don’t be taking a piss. How’d you get her here?” Marlene pressed. 

“You’re the one taking a piss! How’d I get my sister to come to my birthday?”

The air in the group shifted. 

“Pardon?” Remus asked. “You have a sister?”

Sirius looked from friend to friend, becoming just as baffled as they were. 

“Yes? Certainly I’ve told you lot?”

“Certainly not,” Lily said. “I don’t recognize her from school at all?”

“That’s ‘cause she went to Beauxbatons.”

“Wait!” Peter interjected. “I think I remember something from first year. You know, that first night in the dorms?” He looked around the group for backup but no one seemed to remember. He shrugged. “You never brought her up again so I guess we all thought you were lying and forgot about it.”

“Why would I lie about having a sister? If I was going to lie about family, don’t you think I’d choose something better?”

James had stopped listening. Like Marlene, he kept looking at you with the older boys. Without being able to hear whatever you were telling them, James could see the passion in you. 

He was also thinking back to one of his first interviews with the Catapults. It was a ‘Get to Know the New Players’ kind of thing and one of the questions was Celebrity Crush. James wasn’t sure if Sirius ever saw that interview, but he mostly definitely said your name with no hesitation. 

As the night went on, you mainly floated around the children, now adults, of the Sacred 28. They were the only people you actually sort of knew. They all seemed perfectly content to keep you entertained, or to have you entertain them with your professional athlete stories. It seemed to be all you talked about lately. 

You excused yourself to get another drink. James saw you leave the group you were with, not that he was paying attention or anything. James scanned the room for Sirius. The birthday boy was dancing and probably too drunk to remember much in the morning. Perfect. James did not wish a horrible hangover on his best friend; however, he wasn’t sure how Sirius would to him attempting to chat up his sister so an incoherent Sirius was good. 

You were leaning against the bartop as you waited for your drink. 

“On behalf of the Catapults, welcome to the better league,” James said, stepping into the space next to you. 

You raised an eyebrow. “I’m sure I’ll be very welcomed during our first match.”

“You think we’re a match? Brilliant!”

“What?” you asked, standing up straight and turning your shoulders towards him. Apparently he was a stupid drunk?

“You and me. We’re a match. Good pairing. Dynamic duo.”

You scoffed a laugh. “You’re cute,” you said flatly. 

James took it as a compliment. He ran a hand through his hair and grinned the boyish smile that got him on multiple covers of Quidditch Weekly. 

“Glad you think so!”

The bartender set your drink down and you thanked him. You turned back to James. He was still smiling. 

“Is there something you need?” you asked. 

You didn’t mean to be short with James. Well, you did, but in almost any other situation, you might’ve entertained the idea of him more. At the moment, you knew he’d been drinking, he was a new rival, and he appeared to be good friends with Sirius. It wasn’t the time nor place to be flirting. 

“If I ask you something, will you be completely honest with me?”

You blanked for a moment. That wasn’t what you were expecting him to say. You thought he was going to ask for your number, or something along those lines, which he was debating. Then you would have shut him down and walked away. As attractive as James was, he was your new rival. 

“Sure, why not?”

“Why’d you switch leagues?”

“I’m sure you’ve seen an interview.”

“I have,” James said with a smile. “I just don’t believe that’s the whole truth.”

“Of course it isn’t.”

“So, I want the whole truth.”

You took a sip of your drink. 

“You spend a third of your life in France and are fully willing to spend the rest of it there, and you’re still not French enough for the French. I wasn’t born there so I wasn’t good enough to be the star of the France team.”

“Who were you hearing that from? I thought France loved you?”

“Fans, trainers, teammates.” You laughed at the absurdity of it. “The coaches were the only ones who didn’t seem to care I wasn’t French-born. But it was never a huge thing, you know? I was good enough that people worked with me and looked past it, but there were comments. Enough comments and you know how people really feel about you.”

“Merlin, that’s kinda horrible,” James said. 

“So I’m switching to a team that’ll actually appreciate me. And everything else I’ve said in interviews.”

James looked at you with an unreadable expression on his face. You took a sip, waiting for a response that didn’t come. 

“What?” you asked, not wanting it to become awkward. 

“It’s just difficult to see how someone could not appreciate you.”

You rolled your eyes, but your soft smile told James he was doing good.

“So, how well do you know Sirius?” you asked. 

James laughed. He thought you were joking. He thought everyone in this bar knew that he and Sirius shared everything. They often said that they weren’t just friends, they were brothers. Plus, they still lived together after seven years of schooling and having Sirius move into his parents’ house during the summer after fifth year. 

You tilted your head to the side slightly and James’ laughter subsided. 

“Oh, you’re not… Sorry,” James said, rubbing the back of his neck and then running a hand through his hair. “Very well. Better than my broomstick. That’s part of why I waited until he was distracted before talking to you alone.”

You snorted a laugh. “I can’t imagine he’s protective of me.”

“I don’t know about that… But he’d also have my head for paying attention to the wrong Black tonight.”

“Maybe he’s right. It is his birthday.”

James waved his hand dismissively in the direction where he had last seen Sirius. 

“I’m letting other people pay attention to him. Merlin knows I’ve given him plenty,” James said. “So, do I get more questions or was that the one pure honesty answer?”

You pulled out your phone to check the time. It was later than you were expecting and you had a meeting with your coaches in the morning. 

“I think that is going to have to be it. Would you tell Sirius to text me?” you asked. 

“Are you leaving?”

“Yeah. Early-ish morning.”

He nodded, knowing that he’d also have an early morning if his coaches weren’t aware of Sirius’ birthday. They were well aware. 

“I’ll need your number then. I’m not sure he has it.”

You held out your hand for his phone and James’ face lit up. He wasn’t exactly sure you’d give it to him. There was a chance that Sirius did have your number and then he wouldn’t have had a good excuse to get your number besides really wanting to talk to you again. 

“You can give it to Regulus too, but no one else. I don’t need my phone blowing up.”

James looked down as he put his away, and when he looked up, you were gone. You hadn’t said goodnight or bye. A quick glance towards Sirius and you weren’t saying bye to him, nor were you saying bye to Regulus. You had simply vanished. 

By the time he got home, James was itching to text you. He wanted to know that you got home safely, and then he would go from there. But he had more important things to do at the moment. Making sure Sirius ended up tucked into his own bed was at the top of the list. 

James brought Sirius a water and some medication in the morning. He was greeted with a groan. 

“Your sister wants you to text her sometime,” James said. 

“M-kay,” grumbled Sirius. 

James didn’t ask if he needed her number. He assumed Sirius would ask him for it later if he did need it. 

He pulled his phone out of his pocket as he walked back to the living room. It wouldn’t be weird if he texted you now, right?

<get home alright?>

Your phone buzzed in your hand as you were adding a promo photoshoot to your calendar. You didn’t recognize the number. You glanced at the time. It was too early to be Sirius. 

It buzzed again. 

<james btw>

You swiped into the notification. 

<<yea. w/ coaches>>

James didn’t text you again, which was good. You didn’t need a text conversation blowing up your phone as your new coaches went over more scheduling before your debut match as a Wimbourne Wasp. Beyond the meeting, your days were beginning to be filled with training and getting to know the Wimbourne team, both on and off the pitch. 

<whens your first match>

Another new number. You could assume it was Sirius. Anyone associated with the Wasps was either already in your phone or they knew when your debut was. James was the only other person you’d given your number to. 

<<sunday>>

<dinner on fri?>

<<ok>>

Sirius texted you an address and said to come over whenever. That was all the communication you got. You finished up practice on Friday and apparated to a short distance from the address. You weren’t sure of the area, but it seemed okay. 

You knocked on the door. Sirius opened the door after a minute. 

“Hey,” he said. 

“So this’s your place… Not bad.”

“Mum thinks we’re all disappointments but we make do.”

You laughed. “Make do? This is more than make do.” Then you sat down at the table. “So… what do you do?”

Sirius started telling you about the music shop he worked in. The two of you talked about what was going on in your lives beyond work and a little bit about your experiences in school. Then you circled back to the present. 

“Okay, so I need to be prepared. When the tabloids start comin’ round, what do you want me to tell them?” Sirius asked. 

“What do you mean?”

“You know, the gossipy stuff that they write.”

“Um, no, I’m not seeing anyone. Not looking. You’re my brother, ew, gross, we are not sleeping together. Family’s not why I came back but it’s a plus. I don’t hate France. Um, what else?” you asked after listing off what you could think of off the top of your head. 

“How about favorite teammate? That could be drama.”

“Leonard, the keeper. He’s been really welcoming. But for the love of Merlin, emphasize that he’s my teammate and friend, nothing more.”

“Got it.” Sirius laughed lowly. “The first time they found me after James got big, I was a lying mess. I wasn’t expected to be cornered on the way to the pub.”

“Just ‘cause your friends?” 

“I mean, I was going to meet him there.”

At that moment, James stepped out of his room. “Heard you’re talking about me?”

You and James locked eyes, both freezing. Somehow in all the catching up with Sirius, he failed to mention that he was living with James. He also failed to mention to James that you were coming over today. 

“What’re you-I mean, hey. Hi,” James said as his face shifted from confused to excited to nervous. “It’s, uh, good to see you.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, um, you too,” you replied, sounding just as awkward about it as he was. 

Sirius looked from you to James. 

“James, you going somewhere or?” he asked, dragging out the last word. 

James straightened and nodded. “Yeah. Yes. Heading over to Lupin’s.”

“See you later then.”

“Yeah. See you… later…”

James moved towards the door slowly. He was more focused on you and the fact that you were in his flat than he was on where he was walking. He bumped into a small table they had by the door. 

“Bye,” you said as he opened the door. Once he was gone, you turned back to Sirius. “I didn’t realize James was your roommate.”

“You never asked,” Sirius said, a little confused on why it mattered who he lived with. “Does that bother you?” 

Maybe you weren’t a fan of him living with someone who was considered your opponent. 

But you shook your head. “You can live with whoever. Jus’ wasn’t expecting to see him, that’s all.” You paused, and then added, “Lupin… that’s Remus? He lives nearby?”

You stayed at Sirius’ flat for a while. James didn’t return until after you had left; he stayed at Remus’ longer than he originally meant to just so that you wouldn’t be there when he got back. 

“James,” Sirius called from his room when he heard the door open and close. 

“Yeah?”

“About Y/N,” he started. He met James in the hall. “Don’t even think about it.”

James made an odd face. “About what?”

“Don’t shag my sister. Don’t kiss her. Don’t undress her with your eyes. Don’t flirt with her. Just don’t.”

James almost said it was too late for that. At least for the last two. 

“Whatever you say, Pads,” James said lightly, causing Sirius to frown. 

“I’m serious.”

“I know.”

“Actually serious. Don’t touch her.”

“What if she touches me?” 

“She won’t.”

James shrugged and went into his room, leaving a frustrated Sirius in the hall. James hadn’t actually agreed to listen to what Sirius was asking of him. They both knew it. 

<youre wrong>

You stared at the text from James for two minutes before responding. 

<<about?>>

<sirius>

<<pretty sure he’s my brother>>

<hes protective>

<<funny>>

The next day was one team meeting and a light practice. Everyone was told to rest up. It seemed like the whole team was excited for your first official match. You had been practicing really well with the team so far. It would be the first test. 

Falling asleep wasn’t easy. You’d played in hundreds of quidditch matches over the years and the first one of a season always made you nervous. Now, this wasn’t the first of a season, but it was the first with this team in this league. It made you uneasy. What if you ended up playing horribly and you ruined your life by leaving the France team? The team was unlikely to take you back if everything failed. 

You were staring at the dark ceiling in your bedroom when it suddenly lit up. Without looking, you reached over to grab your phone. 

<good luck tmrrw>

<shit>

<hope i didnt wake u>

You exhaled loudly through your nose, but a small smile found itself on your face. 

<<thx>>

James wasn’t expecting a response so quickly. He assumed you’d be asleep, especially given that he was supposed to be asleep. 

<excited?>

<<nervous>>

<youre a superstar>

<youre going 2 kill it>

<<unless i eat shit>>

Because what if you fell off your broom? What if you dropped the quaffle every time it got passed to you? What if you flew right into the stands?

<u wont>

Five letters never felt so… comforting? James didn’t know you. He’d probably seen a match or two, along with an interview. Yet his brief texts soothed you. He had so much confidence in you that it was almost amusing. 

You were asleep before you had the chance to wonder if he would’ve been saying the same thing if you were facing him tomorrow. 

Sirius woke up to an empty flat. He always did on days when James played. Either James was away in some hotel - his coach was firmly against apparating on game days because of the risk of splinching - or his pre-match ritual was already in motion. That day was a home game so James was already at the pitch, watching previous recordings of his opponents. 

You were stretching and trying to find ways to distract yourself at your own home pitch. You took a lap around the stands. You went up and down a few flights of stairs but not too many to wear you out. Eventually the whole team was there and dressed so you could start warming up. You practiced shots against Leonard. 

“How’re you feeling?” he asked as he threw a quaffle back to you. 

“Now that I’m in the air? Brilliant,” you said before chucking the ball through the far hoop, and then immediately flying to get it. 

“Throw like that and you’ll be golden,” he laughed. 

He blocked your next shot. A few minutes passed and warm ups were over. Your team gathered on the ground for a final pep talk from your coach before the match would start. You glanced over at the Appleby Arrows. They had a decent record so far. Not as good as the Catapults, but better than the Wasps. If anyone was being honest, the Wasps were hoping you’d be a hero to them. They needed someone who could consistently score and handle the pressure. 

You could handle the pressure. It wasn’t your best match ever, but it was a win. It was the best match so far for the Wasps that season and it was because of you. You felt like you were walking on air. 

The Catapults had barely snagged the win. The seekers were closing in on the snitch when James passed the quaffle to his teammate. They threw it into a low hoop as the opposing seeker caught the snitch. If the quaffle hadn’t gone through, they would’ve lost the match. 

“Potter!” a reported called as he left the locker room with his bag. 

He held on a groan. He didn’t want to talk to people right now. He wanted to lay on his floor until Sirius made him do something “normal.” James, however, liked being likeable so he put on a smile and stopped for the reporter as she called his name again. 

“Tough match out there today, but congratulations all the same,” she said brightly. 

James nodded and ran a hand through his hair. 

“We need to be putting the quaffle through the hoops more so it doesn’t come down to a final shot like that.”

“That’s the excitement of the game,” she said. “Speaking of excitement… Do you remember your interview for WizRadio last year?”

He chuckled lightly. 

“I can’t say I remember word for word?”

He adjusted his bag strap on his shoulder and leaned down a little bit to appear interested in what she was going to say. 

“You were asked about a celebrity crush and you said everyone’s favorite Y/N Noir.”

James felt his ears growing warm. 

“I need to know, do you share in our excitement with her joining the Wasps? Or did you prefer having such an excellent player in a different league?”

“Like you said, she’s an excellent player and I know she’ll make us work out there if we want to win. I’m always glad to see the league gain great players that keep the game interesting.” 

The reporter smiled at his media-trained answer. 

“Do you know if she won today?” James asked, the words falling out his mouth. 

He could have looked it up on his phone. He could’ve asked literally anyone else. 

The reporter’s face lit up. 

“Oh, following her schedule? Let me see…”

The reporter pulled out her phone to check the league’s website. 

“It looks like the Wasps did beat the Arrows! Any words you’d like to give to the Wasps?”

“I’m sure it was well earned, and I look forward to watching it later.”

“Would you say you’re the newest and biggest Wasp fan?” the reporter asked enthusiastically. 

The heat in his face was increasing so James tried to laugh it off. 

“I try to watch all the matches. Keep an eye on the competition.”

It wasn’t a complete lie. James did try to watch a handful of matches, but sometimes he needed a break from what he considered work. He preferred to watch other leagues and muggle sports, and, as long as he never admitted it out loud, the dramas that Sirius put on. 

After the reporter walked away, James whipped out his phone. 

<told u B) >

He put his phone away and headed to his car. 

<<sirius didn’t tell me you are a seer>>

<this seer cant see>

James laughed at his text before hitting send. You’d laugh at that, right? Because he wear glasses, you’d get it. It was decently known that his lenses were thick. 

“Ooooh! She’s smiling at her phone! Who’re you texting?” Leonard teased, leaning over to peer at your phone. 

The team had gathered at some cheap diner. You were given the choice of a fancy restaurant or here, and you didn’t feel like dressing up. 

You clicked your phone off before Leonard could see anything. 

“It’s no one.”

“Fast reaction for no one.”

“Just someone saying I played well.”

Chloe, another chaser, looked from you to Leonard and grinned. “But who is this someone? Is he cute?”

“Of course he’s cute!” Will, one of the beaters, said and pointed a finger at you. “Noir is too good to not have standards.”

Everyone at the table was staring at you, waiting for you to confirm what they assumed. 

“Fine, yes, he’s cute. Happy now?”

“Do we get a name?” Chloe asked. 

“Absolutely not,” you said firmly. 

James might be a decently common name, but if you gave an inch, they’d take a mile. And James being “cute” wasn’t breaking news but it was more the fact that they’d know you were texting and he had you smiling at your phone. You didn’t need them, one, making it more than it was nor, two, have that getting out and the world making it more than it was. Because you weren’t texting superstar James Potter. You were texting James Potter, your brother’s roommate. 

The next few weeks brought more training, practices, meetings, and matches. The Catapults were good. The Wasps were better than they had been in a few seasons, and you were the obvious reason. You never dropped the quaffle and had the highest scoring percentage on the team. It didn’t matter if you were home or away. You dominated. 

<wicked passing today>

<<aren’t u in wales>>

Not that you were following James’ schedule. That’d be silly. 

<yeah>

Your match was early in the day while James’ was in the evening. He usually didn’t watch the entirety of another match unless it was after his. He made an exception. 

<<how did u see my game?>>

<tvs exist bb>

You both stared at your phone screens. James was mortified he sent that. There was no taking that back. It was delivered and then read and then no bubbles that showed you typing. At least he hadn’t typed out the whole word. James was trying to think of anything he would pretend he meant. Maybe some kind of autocorrect.

<<what channel for u?>>

You were going to look it up, but if James was admitting to watching you play, you could at least return the favor. James got excited at your response. You hadn’t taken his text poorly. 

<37>

<u dont need a tv to check me out>

Okay, maybe he was a little too excited. 

<<checking out the competition>> 

It more or less went from there. You wished each other luck on games and sent each other comments from topics one thought the other would be interested in. You almost called him when an interview with a player on Pride of Portee aired and he started saying some atrocious things. Your finger hovered over the call button before you decided against it. He probably wasn’t watching the interview.

Every time James came out of his room, part of him hoped that you’d be visiting your brother again. An innocent way for your paths to cross. You were never there. 

A little over halfway through December, he sent you a text. 

<gala?>

You stared at it. 

<<?>>

<the xmas gala>

<20>

<fundraiser>

<u going?>

Your coach had called it a fundraiser dinner, specifying that it was a black tie event. Yes, Will, you have to wear a tie. At first you weren’t sure if you would go. You never enjoyed the showy events that you went to with the France team. But your coach spoke with you after the team meeting and said that he was covering your ticket so you needed to go. Being the new face of the Wasps meant you had to show up. 

<<yes>>

You twiddled your thumbs over the keypads. 

<<I assume u are?>>

<see u there>

You felt strange in the days leading up to the gala. You played it off as being worried your dress wouldn’t fit right day of or you’d stumble over words and embarrass yourself in front of a non-quidditch celebrity. Chloe had gone on and on about the other people invited, a bunch of big names and big wallets in the wizarding world. 

And on the 20th, you felt just like you did before your first match with the Wasps. At least you still had your team. Everyone had gotten tickets and agreed to go in together. It was in idea the team’s PR department loved. 

“Oh, she’s a princess,” Leonard praised as you walked into the hotel lobby where you agreed to meet. 

You spun cheesily to show off your dress. 

“The colabs are going to be pouring in after the media sees you,” Chloe said. “Merlin, you are the Marketing Team’s dream!”

“Thank you, but the night is still young,” you said with a laugh. 

The team laughed with you and you headed out. The walk into the gala was lined with photographers and reporters. It was impossible to walk more than three steps without hearing your name yelled. You posed with your team. You knew you should get some solos but you were taking it all in. 

James had arrived before you did. He stopped to talk to a reporter he recognized. If he had the choice, he’d always pick reporters he knew and trusted. 

“Mr. Potter, you look absolutely dashing tonight!” the woman said. “Did you come here with anyone tonight?”

“Trying to come in with me?” James replied with a wink. 

The woman laughed. 

“Unless you count some of my team, no.”

“No lady tonight. Okay. Well, I hope you don’t mind me saying that you’ve been playing fantastically lately. Is there something new going on?”

“Sorry to disappoint, but no. I must just be getting better.”

“And how are you celebrating that?” she asked with a smile. 

James could tell she was looking for something juicy or quote-worthy before she’d move on. 

“Anyone you’re going home to or taking out? Or are you looking for someone tonight?”

James immediately thought of you. You’d be here tonight. 

“There’s no one right now, but a man can dream that the right person will be walking down the carpet tonight. Don’t tell my roommate, but it would be nice to come home to someone besides Sirius.”

James winked at the woman again and continued on. She started calling for an actor’s attention so he knew he was in the clear. Once he made it to the entrance, he scanned the walkway. The world seemed to freeze in the most cliché way. You were stopped in front of the main display. Even from a distance, he could tell you looked radiant. He hadn’t lied to the reporter. A man could dream. 

Just as James turned away, you looked over. You chose to ignore how your heart skipped a beat. A man that handsome had asked if you were going to be here and was looking forward to seeing you. Maybe he was just being friendly for the sake of Sirius, but it still felt nice. 

“Noir, come on!” Chloe called from the next photo spot. 

You smiled and joined her. The rest of the walk inside was fairly normal. You tried to avoid stopping to talk to reporters, but your team stopped as a group so you had to. 

“Y/N, how have you been adjusting to the UK?”

“It feels like home.”

“But how does it compare living to France?”

You stared at her blankly for a few seconds. “You know I grew up in London, right?”

“Oh!” The reporter laughed uncomfortably. “No, I did not.”

Leonard laughed as well and threw an arm over your shoulder. 

“Let’s keep moving,” he said. Once you were a few steps away, he added, “You got to humor them, remember?”

You nodded. “Nervous, I guess.”

“There’s no need to be. You got us. You look amazing. And we’re almost inside.”

A few more stops and you got asked more questions. These times you did better. At least until the last one. Apparently she had been watching you and Leonard for a while. 

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but is there something here?” she asked, moving her finger between the two of you. 

“Excuse me?” you asked with a slight forward lean. 

“You and Leonard. I’m sensing some real chemistry!”

“We’re teammates,” you said, trying not to feel weirded out by the reporter’s assumption. 

“Noir’s beautiful and we get along, but like she said, just teammates,” Leonard added. 

“Maybe you should consider it,” the reporter said, not backing down. “You two would be a cute power couple.”

You and Leonard gave each other knowing looks and walked away. 

“Merlin, she’s got gall,” you muttered to him. 

“Oh no, I get along with my friend. And because you’re a girl, I must want to fuck you,” he whispered back. 

“Let’s just get inside…”

You made sure not to stand nor sit directly next to Leonard for the dinner portion of the evening. You tried looking at him less. There weren’t many reporters allowed inside the actual gala so you felt like you were being watched less but the feeling was still there. It was rough because Leonard was your favorite teammate. 

After dinner, the evening opened up. There was a live performer, a dancing area, a silent auction and lots of free drinks. You drank enough to be comfortable socializing with more strangers but not enough to surely make a fool of yourself. The rest of the team went to the silent auction while you stayed behind. 

You had gotten a new drink and now were nursing it at a standing table, watching the performer and people dancing. James was politely listening to a conversation that he had no interest in, but with nothing else to do, he felt inclined to stay. Then he saw you standing alone. 

A man can dream, right?

“Excuse me, I need to check on something,” James said. “It was good talking to you.”

He took a longer than necessary path to you so that the man wouldn’t quite be able to tell that James was ditching him solely for you. 

“I think they have a rule against pretty girls standing alone,” James said after he walked up to you. 

“How kind of you for preventing me from being a rulebreaker,” you replied. 

“So, do you prefer watching the fun as opposed to partaking in it?” James asked. 

You gave him a confused look. “What do you mean?”

“You’re just standing here. Alone. Not doing anything.”

“I’m enjoying the band.”

“You could be dancing to the band.”

You snorted a laugh. “I won’t be dancing alone.”

“You don’t have to,” James said, offering you his hand. 

“James…”

“Yes?”

“We play each other in three weeks.”

“So?”

“It… It’s not weird to you? People might think we’re trading team secrets.”

“I don’t think they will. I think they’ll see two beautiful people dancing at an event that has a dance floor and live music.”

“James…” You weren’t quite convinced, despite the butterflies in your stomach. 

“All I’m asking for is one dance. And if anyone gives you shit for it, say you were indulging my celebrity crush.”

“What?” you gasped, a mix of being baffled and amused. 

“I’ll explain while we dance?”

You felt your resolve crumble. His smile, those eyes, the hand still extended for her. Maybe James was right and no one would question you dancing. You reminded yourself that part of tonight was to have fun, and if you were seen dancing with James, maybe any ideas that you and Leonard were together would disappear. 

“Okay.”

You followed James out onto the dance floor to join the people dancing. 

“So explain what you said,” you said after a few steps. 

“That I think you’re beautiful? Trust me, love, I’m not the only one saying it.”

“Ha,” you said flatly. “Thank you, but that wasn’t what I meant. Celebrity crush?”

He smiled at you in a way that warmed your heart. 

“Beginning of last season, I was interviewed by WizRadio,” he started. 

“Okay…”

“You know how those things go. Young player full of promise, let’s get to know them as more than talent on a broom. They asked a bunch of questions. Favorite color, favorite breakfast food, what superstitions do I believe in.” He paused. “And who my celebrity crush was.”

You laughed softly. “And you said me?”

“Without hesitation.”

“You sure do flatter me, Potter.”

“Does it count as flattery if I mean it with my whole being?”

“You’re being dramatic about it so yes,” you laughed. 

“Am I though?” He leaned in towards your ear. “I could hear reporters yelling your name the whole time I walked in.”

He was stretching the truth, but it still made you blush. He knew you had to be swarmed. You were you and when you looked like that, everyone would want to talk to you. 

“Are you saying they didn’t yell your name?” You wanted to add how you would yell it, but that was an inside thought. “I hear the people like you.”

James shrugged. “I don’t care if people like me. I care if you like me.”

He winked at you, causing you to roll your eyes. 

“I like you just fine.”

“Do you?”

“I’m dancing with you, aren’t I?”

James pulled you closer. “You are.”

Just like that, one dance turned into two and more. He was undoubtedly charming. His attention was solely on you, and with each song, you felt more and more comfortable. You were both laughing. You only stopped dancing when it was announced that the auction was over. 

“I’m going to find my team,” you said. “Thank you, James.”

He took your hand in his and lifted it to his face. He kissed it gently. 

“Thank you,” he said. 

Somehow your team missed where you had gone to, and when asked, you simply said that you were dancing. They all assumed someone had asked you to dance and you went from person to person as everyone would want to dance with you. They had no clue that it had been James and him alone. 

Despite it being in the tabloids for the next week, your team didn’t bring it up. It was strange. You expected someone, Leonard or Chloe, to bring it up. Not even a coach or media personnel. 

“What’s this?” Sirius asked, throwing the cheapest tabloid he could find on the table in front of James. 

James couldn’t help but smile. You were laughing in his arms, looking like a goddess. 

“Looks like a magazine,” James said with a cheeky smile. 

“Uh-huh. And the bullshit that’s on the cover?”

James leaned down and adjusted his glasses. 

“A beautiful couple dancing?”

“Couple? Potter, I told you to stay away from her!”

“Sirius, a couple as in two people. She looked bored. She was just standing there. And if you really need it-“ James spun the tabloid to be facing Sirius. “-look where my hands are.”

James knew his best friend well. Well enough to know how many lines he could cross in one go. Knowing that he was close, he pointed out a redeeming factor. If his hands hadn’t been in a respectful position, James would’ve found something else. 

Plus, it didn’t hurt to not tell Sirius that if you had danced with James for one more song, he would’ve tried to actually kiss you. That’s all he told himself that he needed. One more song and things would be different. He would’ve been dealing with a much angrier Sirius because someone would’ve gotten a picture of it. 

“Just…” Sirius sighed, defeated and frustrated. “Don’t go making a habit of this,” he said, gesturing to the tabloid. “She’s a grown woman who doesn’t need your rescuing or whatever you call this.”

James wanted to retort that you were a grown woman who could spend her time with whomever you chose and Sirius would have to deal with it if you chose him. But again, James knew his best friend. It was best to drop it. 

The week passed and it was more or less water under the bridge. The holidays came and went. 

<srry i missed u over xmas> 

You almost hoped it was from James rather than Sirius. It felt like a horrible thing to hope, but you couldn’t help it. James was a special kind of person. 

<dinner thurs?>

<<i’ll be there>>

It was a good thing, you told yourself. There was a chance you’d get a brief interaction with James and Sirius would be there as a buffer. You were putting a lot of hope into the idea that seeing James at a distance would somehow stop you from replaying the gala in your mind. If you drifted into your thoughts, you could still feel his hands on your waist. You could smell his cologne. You could see his eyes and the unnamed emotion that swam in them when he looked at you. You trusted yourself that it was better to leave said emotion unnamed. 

You apparated into the lobby of Sirius’ building on Thursday. You made your way upstairs and knocked on the door. You waited a little bit. No answer. You knocked again. This time you heard some movement inside the flat. 

“Coming!” a voice yelled, muffled by the door and not quite sounding like Sirius. 

Then the door opened to reveal a shirtless James. 

“Oh, hi,” he said, surprised. 

Your eyes flicked up and down. “Classy.”

“I wasn’t expecting company.”

You walked into the entry way and slipped off your shoes. 

“Not my fault Sirius didn’t tell you I was coming over. Where is he anyways?”

The flat was dark, only light coming from the kitchen. 

“At the cinema with Peter. Was he supposed to be here?”

“Obviously? It is Thursday, right?”

James nodded. 

“Well, if he’s not here, I’ll go. Sorry to disrupt whatever you were doing,” you said. 

“Stay!” James said with a bit too much urgency. He coughed. “I mean, you can stay if you like. I’ll make you something. I was just going to make my own dinner and then put a film on. Obviously you don’t have to stay for the film but at least stay for dinner.” He paused. “Please.”

You bit the inside of your lip. First he dances with you and now he’s offering to make you dinner. 

“What were you going to have?”

“I was going to have Hot Pockets, but unfortunately you can’t have that delicacy. Only got two left.”

“Oh, I know better than to come between a boy and his Hot Pockets. It’s not a big deal, James. I’ll just-“

“I’m making you something. Chef Potter is at your disposal. Speak a dish and I shall prepare.”

He flourished his hand and struck a pose. James fully meant it too. If you requested lasagna or a five course meal, he’d whip out an apron and get to cooking. 

“Pizza?”

“Frozen or fresh? If you want fresh, I’ll have to nip down to the store.”

“Frozen is more than fine.”

“Alrighty.”

James disappeared into the kitchen while you turned on lights in other rooms. You sat down at the table. When James joined you, he had acquired a shirt. 

“So how did you like the gala?” James asked.

“It was better than the ones I grew up going to.”

“Yeah?”

“Did Sirius never tell you about them?”

“Oh, he told me about them,” James laughed. “But how am I supposed to know if they’re for the same reasons?”

“There was never anything for us to do as kids. I had to eat food I didn’t like. Had to wear uncomfortable dresses. Making small talk with people I don’t know or want to know was different. Now it’s reporters instead of some great uncle who should’ve been long dead.”

“Sirius said he got told to be quiet to the point your parents…” James trailed off, wishing he hadn’t started that sentence. 

“I chose which battles to fight. Sirius chose all of them.”

There was a moment of uncomfortable silence. 

“Alright, new topic!”

“If you went to Hogwarts, what house do you think you’d be in? Since Sirius was in Gryffindor but your family is-“

You cut him off with your answer. That led into a deeper conversation about how you compared to your brothers and telling stories about them. It lasted the entire time it took to cook the pizza and to eat it. When James went to put the plates in the sink, you realized that you had to decide if you were leaving. Your heart was telling you to stay. 

“So, um, what movie are we going to watch?”

“You’re staying?” 

James didn’t bother trying to mask his excitement. He had been enjoying his conversation with you so much that he felt a bit sad putting this dishes away as it meant you were likely leaving. But you just said we. You were staying for the movie. 

“Sirius got to watch a movie,” you said with an air of nonchalance. 

You went over to the couch and got comfortable. 

“We got a few options…” 

James held up the movies as he listed them off and let you choose which one to put in. Then he sat on the couch next to you. He wasn’t overly close, but it was enough. 

Everything that happened after that was delicately subtle. The way he casually draped his arm across the back of the couch like he did that every time he sat down. You shifting in your seat so you were ever so slightly leaning towards him. Him leaning forward to increase the volume, allowing his arm across the couch to move forward to your shoulder closer to him and when he sat back up, he placed his arm loosely around your other shoulder. Then you were adjusting again, only this time to be closer to James until you were leaning into his side. 

Every movement was accompanied with pounding hearts and slow breaths. When the anticipation of it all wore off, James reached over to hold your hand. It was romantic to say the least. You sat like that for a while, watching the movie. In your opinion, it was better than any dinner and catching up with Sirius would’ve been. 

Then there was jump scare in the movie. You jumped and hid your face in James’ chest without thinking. Once you realized what you did, you kept your face hidden longer, more for covering your embarrassment than avoiding the screen. James gave your hand a squeeze. He hoped it told you that you were okay. 

When you did pull back from his chest, you said quietly, “Sorry… Didn’t mean to.”

James just smiled at you. 

“You’re welcome to my chest any time.”

Replaying the night in your head later, you’d think it was an interesting thing to say, but in the moment it was sweet. Sweet enough that you almost leaned in to kiss him. Sweet enough that when you didn’t lean in and he did, you almost let him kiss you. 

But the image of Sirius coming in to see you and James kissing popped into your head and you jumped up. 

James gaped at you, confused. He thought the moment had been right. Things had been going so good!

“I’m sorry,” you apologized again. “It’s just… I can’t. We can’t.” You walked towards the door. “Thank you for dinner, James, but I really should be-“

As soon as you started walking away, James was on his feet and following you. 

“Wait!” he said, grabbing your elbow before you could open the door. “Did I mess up?”

“I… Nothing you did was… wrong, per say, but…” Your voice trailed off. You sighed heavily. “I just need to go.”

As James let his hand fall, he could hear a symphony of sad violins. He didn’t want you to go. He wanted you to stay, to finish the movie. He’d sit on the floor if it meant that you’d stay. Maybe then you’d at least get to see Sirius some whenever he got back from Peter’s. 

But you walked out the door and closed it behind you. 

The next week went on like any other. Practices. Meetings. Training. You were focused. At least, you were trying to be. No one seemed to noticed that you were a little distracted. James and his stupid smile and dinner kept sneaking into your thoughts. 

He had texted you the next morning, apologizing if he overstepped and misread the situation. You didn’t respond. You didn’t know how to. 

You did exactly what I wanted you to, but we’re opponents and you’re also my brother’s best friend so it’s a little weird. But Merlin, I love being around you and I think I do like you. 

That wasn’t something you could articulate in person and it wasn’t something you were going to text. And it did not help that you were playing him on Saturday. 

When you arrived at the stadium, you weren’t nervous. You were feeling more confident than you expected yourself to feel. Yesterday’s practice had been fantastic and it was reflecting in your warmups. The whole team was ready to beat the Catapults and propel your team to the top rankings. 

Your team was announced and you were completely in the zone as you mounted your broom and took off into the sky. You got into position. You were ready to snag the quaffle as soon as it was thrown into the air. 

Then James appeared directly across from you on the Catapults’ side. He smiled at you. You knew the smile was just for you. Only you. It was as close to the greeting he wanted to give you as he could get, given the circumstances. 

Things seemed to move in slow motion. You didn’t notice the balls being released and the quaffle being thrown until Amit, the third chaser, shouted your name to get your attention. Luckily, Chloe had grabbed the quaffle. But she still needed someone to pass to. 

Unfortunately, the entire match seemed to go like that. You were a half step behind. A fraction of a second slow in reactions. It wasn’t horrible playing for the Wasps, but compared to the Catapults, it wasn’t your best game. At least you made every shot you took. You just needed to take more shots during the match. 

The Catapults’ seeker caught the snitch. The game had been fairly close in the end and it really did come down to the snitch. You didn’t speak to anyone as you marched back to the locker room. 

After a long shower and taking your time to get dressed, you checked your phone

<sorry>

You threw it into your bag without a second glance. Once again, you couldn’t respond. James had nothing to be sorry for. He played a clean game and so did his team. 

You were playing different scenarios over in your head that might’ve gotten a different outcome. You were so in your head that you didn’t notice that you slammed the locker room door when you left, nor that you slammed it in Leonard’s face. 

“Hey,” his voice broke through your thoughts. “Don’t beat yourself up over that match. You played well.”

“We could be better,” you muttered. “Should’ve won…”

Leonard put his hand on your shoulder. You had lost before. This wasn’t how you had acted then; something was different. 

“Noir, is this about losing or losing to the Catapults?” he asked in a lower voice. 

You had been looking down at your feet as you walked. You lifted your head. 

“What are you implying?”

“That maybe a certain Catapult-“

“Don’t finish that thought.”

Leonard let go of your shoulder in favor of holding his hands up in defense. 

“Listen, no issue here if there is something. But the team knows about the gala. May not have seen it in person, but you know. And I’ve heard he’s friends with your brother. I don’t know if that changes anything, but-“

“But nothing. And there isn’t anything there, so, yeah, there’s no problem. We just lost.”

Leonard hummed and let you walk away from him. This was most certainly not an average loss to you and he knew that you knew he knew it. Being a keeper, he had learned how to not blame himself entirely for lost matches. He wasn’t sure you had mastered that. 

You were positively stewing by the time you got home. Because, right, there was nothing there. Nothing between you and James. Just an almost kiss and a bunch of unspoken feelings, because you thought it was wrong in every way except for that you liked him and he liked you

Unless he didn’t actually like you and all of that was to get you off your A-game. It seemed like a lot of work for a match, but maybe you didn’t really know James. 

You promised yourself that you would stop indulging in whatever this was with James, if he tried to continue with it. You didn’t text him at all. There was a <we good?> and you left him on read. 

James tried to give you space, but it was killing him knowing he had gotten so close yet you were so far out of reach. He could almost pretend that it wasn’t only him, that maybe you were taking a texting break. But he knew you were talking to Sirius. 

“I’m headed out!” Sirius had called down the hall. 

“Bit early for the pub, isn’t it?”

“Nah, going to Reg’s. We’re doing a sibling meal. Y/N’s idea.”

“Oh,” was all James could say. 

Obviously you were talking to your brothers and getting together with them. And not that he was slowly growing desperate for any sign of you, but he got an alert on his phone that you were seen out with your team at a diner. In the picture? You were laughing at something on your phone and showing it to the keeper on your team. 

It was just James. 

He thought with more time, you’d come around. But after a tough morning training, all he wanted to do was text you for someone to rant about coaches to. He typed, deleted, and retyped a message seven times, running his hands through his hair before, during and after each tone. 

“Fuck it,” he muttered to himself. 

He called. You gave him one ring before sending him to voicemail. James sighed heavily and, again, ran a hand through his hair as your voice told him to leave a message. 

“Hey, um, it’s James. I guess I must be a twat or something since you won’t talk to me… Unless you’re actually busy right now, then disregard that and call me when you get the chance. But, um, yeah. I’m sorry for whatever I did. Tell me and I’ll do better. That’s a James Potter promise.” He chuckled lightly. “So, yeah. I’ll hopefully talk to you later.”

James stepped out of his room and came face to face with Sirius. 

“Damn, who’s got you in the doghouse now?” Sirius laughed. “Haven’t heard the James Potter promise in a while.”

“Desperate times, mate,” James said. 

“So, who it is. You haven’t brought anyone ‘round lately.”

“We’re…” James’ voice trailed off. 

Not anything, technically. He had hoped the gala and the accidental night in would be enough to jumpstart something. Now you weren’t responding to him. 

“Undefined.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Were you ever defined?”

“Yes and no.”

“Prongs, mate, you got to give me more than that.”

“We were working towards something. I think. At least I was and it felt like she felt it too. And now, well, you heard it. She’s not talking to me.”

Sirius hummed and said, “Okay. How long were you working towards something?”

“Like two months?”

“Two months?”

“Yes?”

Sirius shrugged. “How come you haven’t mentioned her?” 

“It’s private.”

Sirius laughed and grabbed James’ shoulder. “Private? Mate, what are you on?”

James gave Sirius a confused look. 

“Since when don’t you tell ‘bout whatever girl you’ve chasing?”

“Since I know you won’t like her.”

Sirius scoffed. 

“Won’t like her? What is this?” He crossed his arms. “Why does it matter if I like her? You like her.”

“Fine, little correction. I know you wouldn’t like us together.”

“So she’s a horrible human being like my mother?”

“What? No!”

“Then why won’t I like a girl who makes you happy?”

“You know why,” James said in a sigh, turning away from Sirius. 

“I… know… why?” he repeated. 

James couldn’t look at him. That’s when it hit Sirius. 

“No.”

James didn’t say anything. 

“No!”

Sirius punched James and James let him. It was a bit dramatic but James fell to the ground. Sirius all but stormed out of their flat. James had never been on the receiving end of Sirius’ punches. He gathered himself but remained seated on the ground. 

You listened to James’ voice twenty times. Every time he said he wanted to talk to you later, you hit play again. That was normal, right? Totally normal. 

You sighed. “Fuck it.”

<<wasps pitch 12>>

You went straight to the stadium. It was still early so he wouldn’t apparate there yet. You let yourself in and went out to the pitch to sit down. You waited. It felt better to wait here than anywhere else. 

“Noir.”

You hadn’t noticed time passing. At some point you laid back and stared at the sky. 

“Potter,” you said. 

“Did you… did you get my voicemail?”

You huffed a laugh. 

“Get comfortable.”

He listened and sat down next to you. Neither of you said anything for a few minutes. James watched you and you watched the stars come out and hide behind clouds. 

“So…” he said slowly. 

“The stars are nice.”

“Y/N.”

“I told you to get comfortable and you’re sitting.”

So James laid out next to you. He left space between your shoulders, but you scooted right up next to him. 

“Hey,” you whispered. 

He turned his head to see you, only to see you far closer than he expected. 

Then you did what he wasn’t expecting. You kissed him. Gentle, soft, tender. Immediately, James cupped the side of your face to hold you closer. When you pulled away, you pressed your face into his chest, much like you had during that movie at his flat. 

“So was I a twat or…”

“No. I was scared…”

“Of?”

“It not being right.”

“Well, is it?”

“Right? Feels like it.”

James hummed. “So what now?”

“I don’t know. But can we just lay here for a bit and deal with it later?”

“Yeah. We can do that.”

James pulled you closer to him and you watched the stars for an hour. Then you brought him back to yours with the promise of figuring Sirius, the league, and everything else out in the morning. 

“She only throws it when he’s on some bitch’s story,” Daphne corrected. 

“Right. Well, Theo, go see what’s up,” Pansy said as she leaned over Draco’s chair. 

“Why would I do that?” Theo asked. 

“She tolerates you when she’s in a mood. If we send Enzo, he won’t be able to have kids.”

Theo signed, but set his book down on the table and got up. He walked over to you. You didn’t look up from your phone, but you knew he was there. 

“Amore,” he said. 

“Theodore.”

He sat down next to you. “Pansy wants to know what pretty boy did this time.”

“You don’t look like Pansy.”

“That’s for the better. I don’t need to be receiving Malfoy’s dick pics.”

You exhaled an amused breath. Theo nudged your shoulder with his, glancing at your phone screen. 

“So what’d the twat do?”

“Hasn’t texted me yet. We’re going to bar, but-“

Your phone vibrated in your hand. You frowned. 

“Nevermind. I’ll be staying in.”

“That doesn’t sound right. You’re already ready.”

“Apparently there’s some pick-up quidditch match in the gardens.”

“The bars are still open.”

You gave Theo a look that said So?

“Merlin, we’ll,” he said with a gesture to the group, “go with you. You don’t need that sorry Gryffindor to be let in.”

“Yeah! Let’s go out! No moping like last week!” Pansy said. She was still bent over Draco’s chair but had been eavesdropping. 

“Last week he said he’d come over late,” you said, not denying that you had been moping. 

“And did he?” Theo asked. 

“No.”

He stood up and held his hand out to you. Slightly begrudgingly, you took it and allowed him to help you up. 

“Wait! Wait! We need to finish this hand!” Lorenzo yelled. 

“It’s cards,” Theo said flatly. 

“Enz just wants to lose officially,” Daphne said with a laugh as she laid down her hand. 

“Fuck!” Lorenzo swore. 

“My point.”

The rest of the table laid their cards down, some with more emotion than others. Draco had to stop by his dorm before heading out. Then you were walking to the bars with your friends. You could almost forget about Cormac for the night.

The walk to the bar wasn’t too long and soon enough, you all had drinks in your hands. Pansy immediately dragged Draco towards the dance floor. Daphne, Blaise, Mattheo, and Lorenzo followed shortly, leaving you and Theo standing off to the side. 

“Are you at least going to dance tonight?” you asked Theo, despite already knowing his answer.

“I don’t dance.”

“You always say that.” You grabbed his arm and gave it a quick squeeze. “And we both know it’s a lie.”

“We don’t speak of that night.”

“It was a great night and I think it’d do you some good to do more.”

“Right,” he said with an eye roll. 

“Hey, you’re the one who wanted me to come along.”

“We all wanted you to come along.”

“Uh-huh. Then why wasn’t Blaise asking about my evening plans?”

Theo took a sip of his drink. “Worried you’ll give ‘im a concussion.”

“They’re so dramatic,” you said with a quiet laugh.

“Look who’s talking.”

It was your turn to roll your eyes.

“Well, I can’t stop you from being a wallflower all night. I won’t be.”

You gave Theo one more smile before joining your dancing friends in the crowd, leaving Theo to stand against the wall alone. He was always one to help get a group together to go out, but he’d participate the least. He called it observing, supervising even. Lorenzo called it being lame. Sometimes Theo would retort with something about not wanting to make a fool of himself. Draco would add that he already did that. 

Theo had no problem with coming along to make sure you had a good time and stayed safe. He liked watching you dance and have fun. He liked that you looked over at him and smiled, sometimes waving him over to join but he never does. 

Lorenzo took your hand and spun you around. Theo could faintly hear your laugh through the music. Dancing with Lorenzo was an exaggerated experience. He was all about big movements and extra steps. If people didn’t move out of the way or get pushed, you’d run into them. After a few more spins and two dips, Lorenzo left you for a girl Theo didn’t know. You laughed with Pansy at Lorenzo’s attempts to find a girl to take back to his dorm later. 

Theo stepped away from his spot to refill his drink. When he got back, someone had their hands on your hips. He took a slow sip. 

That boy’s hands should’ve been seared. You weren’t his to touch. 

Not that you were Theo’s to touch either, but at least he wasn’t actively doing it. 

You didn’t necessarily lean into the stranger’s touch, but you also didn’t pull away. There was no turning around and saying that you have a boyfriend. It wasn’t lewd dancing. After two songs, the guy looked Theo’s way without realizing he was being watched. The stranger didn’t last two seconds in Theo’s glare. 

You kept dancing with your friends. Every few songs, a new guy would appear. Sometimes you left them to get a new drink, but other times they spotted Theo and got the message real quick. 

There was one guy who wasn’t looking Theo’s way and he didn’t like how he was touching you. His hands were going too high and too low. 

Something in him snapped. He threw back the rest of his drink, set the cup down on the counter, and walked over to you. His expression was dark enough that people stepped out of his way. You smiled at Theo briefly. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him look like that; it was downright murderous. Even worse, you thought he looked hot. 

“Alright, mate, think it’s time you moved on,” Theo said. 

The guy barely glanced at Theo, but the look in his eye was disbelieving. 

“Yeah right,” he said. “Who’re you? Her boyfriend?” The stranger laughed. 

The guy had watched you long enough to know that if you had a boyfriend, he certainly wasn’t here tonight. 

“No, I’m worse,” Theo said. 

It happened so fast that you didn’t even realize you screamed. Theo’s fist hit the guy’s cheek bone, and then his jaw. A shove had the guy on the ground and Theo would’ve kept going if Lorenzo and Blaise hadn’t grabbed his shoulders to pull him back. 

“Merlin, Nott, calm down,” Lorenzo hissed in his ear. 

Your whole group was summoned. Lorenzo and Blaise didn’t let go of Theo. Pansy and Daphne put themselves between you and the stranger and Theo. One of the bouncers was coming over to investigate but Mattheo and Draco stopped him. 

“Don’t bother. We’re leaving. He’s just going to pay,” Mattheo said. 

The bouncer nodded and turned back around. Mattheo had that effect with people - when he spoke, people listened. Your whole group was pretty sure it was a mix of his anger issues and family name. Draco could also get people to listen, but right now he was more useful for his wallet. 

After your group had successfully escorted him outside, Theo tried to pull free of Lorenzo and Blaise, but they kept their grip on him. They didn’t seem pleased that the night had been cut short. Mattheo and Draco weren’t too far behind you. Draco handed everyone except Theo their cards. 

“We’re advised to not go back for two weeks,” Mattheo said. “Nice going.”

Before Theo could respond, Blaise added, “I think that’s the first time Theo’s gotten us thrown out. Usually it’s Mattheo.”

He let go of Theo at the same time as Lorenzo. Theo stumbled forwards but it wasn’t enough for him to fall. He regained his footing and kept going. 

“Wow, not going to tell us what happened?” Pansy called after him. 

Theo kept going. So the group looked to you. 

“Any idea?” Pansy asked. 

“No clue,” you said, hoping you conveyed more confusion than you felt. 

Theo clearly didn’t like you dancing with that boy, based on what was said. You didn’t know why. Theo wasn’t your boyfriend. He was just a life-long friend. But he had said that he was worse, worse than being your boyfriend. You didn’t know what he meant by that. 

Possibly your brother?

You didn’t necessarily like that thought. Then your brother was one of your best friends and extremely fit and, more times than you’d like to admit, in your dreams. 

As you walked back with Daphne and Pansy at your side and watching Theo stalk ahead of the whole group, you thought more about Theo. He was your first real crush. He wasn’t some famous actor or singer or other celebrity. He wasn’t a hot employee at a cafe you frequented that you could dream about while knowing there was only a fraction of a chance of it happening. Theo was real. He was close. He was an almost. 

If cards were played differently… If he drew your hair tie for seven minutes in heaven or spun the bottle your direction… If you played strip poker rather than exploding snap… Maybe… 

But it didn’t so you weren’t and you were dating someone else. An older boy who had actually asked. Someone who made a move. Except Cormac wasn’t really a man of action anymore. It was almost as difficult to get a “No” or “I’m busy” out of him as a commitment to do anything. 

Once you were back at the dorms, Theo didn’t go inside. He stepped off to the side and lit a cigarette. 

“Night, ladies,” Mattheo said, joining him. 

Everyone else went inside. You went with Daphne and Pansy into their dorm while the rest of the boys started a new card game.  

“So the anger issues are new,” Mattheo said after his second drag. With the group gone, he felt they could talk. 

“I don’t have anger issues.”

“And my father isn’t a murderer.”

Theo took a drag to give him time before he responded. 

“I just lost control for a second. I’m fine,” he said with too much conviction. 

“What’d the bloke do?”

A pause. 

“Nott?”

“Riddle?”

“What’d he do?”

Theo didn’t say anything. Mattheo didn’t push. Not even as Theo flicked away his butt and lit another. 

“He needed to be punched,” he finally said. 

“I don’t doubt that,” Mattheo chuckled with a shake of his head. “But why’d you do it?”

Theo didn’t answer again. 

“Okay. So, when did you start fighting McLaggen’s battles for him?” Mattheo asked. 

The subtle shift in Theo’s demeanor told Mattheo he was dead on. 

“I don’t,” Theo growled. 

“Then what’s with punching the bloke dancing with his girlfriend?”

Nothing. 

“He cancelled, right? They didn’t break up?”

“He’s a bloody shitshow.”

“Uh-huh. Go on,” Mattheo said with a wave of his hand. 

Theo paused. “There’s nothing more to say. He was a proper twat who needed to be punched and McLaggen wasn’t around to do it, so I made sure it got done.”

“So there’s nothing… No other reason you punched him? All just taking care of business?”

Theo flicked his cigarette. “Yes.” 

Mattheo dropped it for the time being. Theo was mentally hitting himself for being so obvious. 

That night didn’t change anything. Life continued the same as ever. Going to class, studying in the library, returning to your dorm at night, and seeing Cormac whenever he made time for you. 

You made plans with him to hang out after his last class. Your last class was before then, so you were passing the time in Theo’s room. You attempted to work on assignments, but that led to you ranting about your Muggle Studies’ professor. Theo liked to remind you that you chose to study that subject.

“It’s not the subject that I mind. It’s the professor,” you said in a huff. “It’s really fascinating what muggles have done without magic. Need I remind you that muggles invented that device you’re currently using?” 

Theo looked back at his phone and shrugged. “Doesn’t mean the study of them isn’t boring. I’m sure lots of important stuff happened in history but you won’t see me taking that class.”

“Binns really lost us with that class, didn’t he,” you laughed before your previously sour expression returned as you refocused on your notes. “But if I have to teach myself another chapter, then I’m asking for a refund for this class. It’s ridiculous.” 

A few minutes passed. Your phone rang and with a quick glance at it, you answered it. 

“Hey, Cormac,” you said. 

“Where are you?”

“My friend’s room. Why?”

“Did you forget I was coming over?”

You frowned. “You have class until 4:30 and it’s-“ You paused as you pulled your phone away from your face to check the time. “-3:15. Are you calling me from class?”

“I’m in your room? Class got cancelled.”

“My room? How did you get in?” you asked, sitting up straight. 

“I think her name’s Astoria?”

“Uh, alright,” you sighed. “Give me a minute and I’ll be right over.”

You hung up and then gave Theo a forced smile. “Guess I’m heading out early. See you later?”

“Yeah. Later.”

You ignored Theo’s tone. You knew he wasn’t a fan of Cormac and he never tried to hide it. You didn’t think about it often, but Theo didn’t really like any of your previous boyfriends. You swore it was an overprotective best friend thing. He just really, really didn’t like Cormac. Nor did he like being ditched for Cormac. 

Later that week, Cormac told you he’d take out for dinner, someplace fancy to make up for something or another. It always seemed like he was making something up to you. So once again, you were sitting on the couch in the common area, scrolling on your phone as you waited for him. At least he had texted you that he was on his way to pick you up. You really should know better by now. Some excuse is bound to light up your phone and then you’ll be ordering delivery because you can’t be arsed to go to the cafeteria. 

Theo walked out from his dorm with the intention of going to said cafeteria. At least until he say you and the slight frown that was etched onto your face more often than not. Unlike you, he did know better. 

“Pizza or Chinese?” he asked. 

“We’re going to a Mexican place,” you said. Your finger paused mid-swipe as you gave Theo a weak smile. 

He plopped down unceremoniously on the couch next to you and threw his arm loosely around your shoulder. 

“And when your shitshow of a boyfriend cancels again, what do you want?”

You exhaled heavily through your nose. “Chinese. Extra sauce.”

“I know.”

Your smile grew slightly. Besides the fact that your order hadn’t changed in years, it was nice that Theo knew. He remembered. He probably knew you’d pick Chinese but still gave you an option. Cormac had simply chosen the restaurant. 

Part of you thought that you had a better time with Theo than you would’ve if Cormac hadn’t cancelled. Chances are you would’ve ended up fighting over something stupid. That was also becoming as common as him canceling the dates he suggested and planned in the first place. 

It was an evening when you hadn’t even tried to make plans with Cormac. You were just going to have a good time with your friends. You weren’t going out. Someone brought out some drinks and snacks. Between your group and other people living in Slytherin, there were three card games going, a game of truth or dare, and a drinking game you didn’t care for. 

You were sitting next to Daphne as she played cards. Lorenzo was making a crude joke. You looked down to check your phone, hoping that maybe Cormac had sent you a text or a snapchat, anything really to prove he was thinking about you. No notification, but you went to check the apps individually. He had posted to his Snapchat story. 

You shouldn’t have opened it. 

“Fuck me sideways,” you muttered before tossing your phone to the side with far more force than necessary. 

There was an audible shattering sound. 

The room stilled momentarily before crescendoing back to its original volume. Daphne could feel the tense irritation radiating off of you but she made no comment. 

It was Theo who took action. Of course it was him. 

“Repairo,” he cast, pointing his wand at your phone but leaving it where it was. 

He thought you didn’t need to keep scrolling and refreshing apps to see what your sorry excuse of a boyfriend was up to. Everyone knew that’s what you saw without seeing it for themselves: Cormac was with another girl and they were posting about it for you to see. 

Your mood was ruined. Those sitting directly around you felt it and they walked on eggshells all night to not make it worse. You stayed sitting by Daphne. Theo watched you carefully from where he sat. He wasn’t sure how much longer you’d last in the common area. He got up and fetched your phone for you. 

“Movie?” he asked as he held out your phone. 

You nodded and the two of you went back to his dorm. No one ever whispered about it. No one speculated about what went on between you two. It was far too common knowledge that you were life long best friends and when you needed to cool off, you went to him. 

Theo immediately fell onto his bed, reaching for the remote. Sometimes you laid next to him. His shoulder made a great pillow when you were sleepy enough. This time you sat on the floor with your back against his bed. He picked a movie, one he’d seen before but was positive you hadn’t. To be fair, that category had a lot of movies in it. 

He lasted fifteen minutes before the question that was eating him alive fought its way out of him. 

“Amore.”

“Theodore.”

“Can I ask you something?”

Theo only prefaced his questions with that if he was about to irritate you. He knew it, as well as he knew you. Assuming he wasn’t an idiot, you guessed at what he wanted. 

“No, you can’t have my Transfiguration essay for Draco to copy.”

“Don’t need your essay. He already has mine,” Theo said with a huff of a laugh. He paused. Then, “Why’re you still with McLaggen?”

He was an idiot. But you still sat up and turned so you could see him. 

“What do you mean?”

“He’s a fucking shitshow and you deserve better.”

Straight to the point. That’s how you knew he wasn’t messing around. There was no flowery language, no beating around the bush; he was looking straight in the eye. 

“Wow, thanks, Theo. Tell me how you really feel,” you said dryly with an eye roll. You turned back to watch the movie. 

“I’m just saying. He cancels on you all the time. He lets other girls crawl over him. He posts about. Bastard doesn’t even have the decency to do it in private. From where I sit, you’re begging for his attention and he’s treating you like a second thought, if that.”

“Thought about this, have you?” you snapped bitterly. Then you added, “What’s it to you anyways?”

I’m in love with you was what Theo wanted to say. He wanted to whisk you away from that asshole so that you could know what it was to be so very loved and adored in a way that a friend couldn’t. However, it was a delicate situation. He was well aware of how it could all backfire. So he took the safe route. 

He shrugged and said, “I’m your friend. Jus’ think you’d be happier with someone who actually gave you the light of day.” Another pause. “I told you, you deserve better.”

“Right.”

You slouched more against his bed. He didn’t say anything more. He knew you well enough to know when he needed to shut his mouth if he valued his life. Besides, he had brought it to your attention and now, you were thinking about it.

You did deserve better. You thought so every time Cormac ditched you for something, or someone, else. Then you would think that maybe you didn’t deserve better because you’d caught yourself more than once thinking about Theo in ways that you shouldn’t. Especially when you caught yourself doing it when it was just you and Cormac. 

Less than a week went by before you threw your phone again. Your friends all stared for a moment, like last time. And then they went on as if nothing happened, like last time. And like last time, Theo didn’t just let it be. 

He got up and picked up your phone. 

“Repairo.”

That wasn’t new. He always fixed it for you, even though you were perfectly capable of casting the simple spell. This time he didn’t hand it back right away. His fingers moved across the screen. Then he held it out for you to take. 

It was open to your text conversation with Cormac. A message was typed but not sent. 

<we’re done>

Simple. Succinct. 

You looked at Theo with a melancholy expression. 

“I’d block his number too and unfollow him on everything.”

Daphne, who was sitting next to you again, stared at Theo shocked. Everyone knew that you and Cormac couldn’t last, but they all assumed you’d grow tired of his behavior. They never thought that someone else would have to suggest that you break up with him. 

Your eyes flicked between Theo and the message he had typed. 

You hit the send button. Within seconds, your phone started ringing and Cormac’s face stared up at you. At least, it did until you sent it flying across the room with a yelp. All of your friends had gone silent and were either staring at you, your still-ringing phone, or going between the two. 

The ringing paused momentarily. Presumably your voicemail greeting was telling Cormac to leave a message and you’d listen to it in 3-5 business days, responses not guaranteed. Then it started ringing again. 

“Do you want me to…” Theo asked you in a low voice with a barely-there gesture towards your phone. 

You nodded. Part of you assumed he was just going to get it for you. You didn’t expect him to silence the call and then unlock your phone. Unlocking your phone wasn’t really an issue. Everyone in the group knew your password was your birthday. Then he started blocking Cormac everywhere. His number. Instagram. Facebook. Twitter. WhatsApp. Snapchat. VSCO. Even his email. If there was a way for him to contact you via that phone, Theo was removing the older boy.  

Then he went back into your contacts and found his own name. 

/id treat you better/ he typed in the notes under his contact. Then he closed out of the app, reopened messages, and gave you your phone back. 

“Didn’t break this time. I think that’s a first.”

You made a weak noise that might’ve been a laugh. You took your phone back and tucked it into your pocket. Theo sat on the armrest of the couch. 

“Well? Carry on,” he said. 

Lorenzo cleared his throat. “Did you see that Hannah Abbott’s trying to sell some of the stuff she grows? And it’s, uh, heh, not for potion making.”

“Doesn’t she need a permit or something for that?” Daphne asked, and conversation took over the group. 

You were no longer the center of attention. You sank deeper into the couch. You kept glancing at your phone, expecting Cormac’s name to appear. It never did. He was blocked. Theo reached over and comfortingly rubbed your back. He saw you turn your phone over and over in your hands and the way your eyes looked down every time it was screen-side up. 

After a while, you set your phone down and got fully immersed in the conversation. You were laughing and snarking off like usual. Theo relaxed. Eventually he got tired of being around people so he headed back to his dorm, and, not surprisingly, you weren’t far behind. 

You knocked on his door before opening it. 

“Hey, d’you mind if I-“ you started to ask. 

“Like I’d say no,” Theo said. 

He was already laying on his bed shirtless as if talking off his shirt had been the first thing he did when he got back. It was, but that wasn’t here nor there. When you followed Theo, you also didn’t want to be in the big group; however, you also didn’t want to be alone. Your roommate, Millicent, was probably in your dorm already since she didn’t really socialize with the group much. She didn’t count as company. Not in your mind. Not when your other option was Theo. 

“I don’t want to be alone,” you said quietly. 

“I know.”

Theo scooted over to make room for you. You climbed onto his bed and snuggled into his side so that he’d place his arm around you protectively. He did. Sometimes you hated how well he treated you when you were only friends. How were you supposed to find someone better than him?

Your phone started to ring and Theo felt you tense. You were shocked for a moment that it wasn’t Cormac. Then you remembered he was blocked. 

“Millie?” you asked, answering the call. 

“Hey, um, where are you?”

“Theo’s room. Why?” 

You figured she had looked in the common area for you. You partially assumed that she locked herself out again. 

“Your boyfriend’s here and he wants to talk to you.”

You frowned. “Ex-boyfriend,” you corrected. “Just tell him to leave.”

“Can’t.”

“Can’t?”

“Might want to tell Nott to lock his door.”

The call ended. You looked up at Theo. 

“Can we lock your door?”

“What for?” As if he hadn’t been able to hear the entire conversation. 

“Corma-“

There was pounding on the door. 

“Heh.” Theo got up and opened the door. He stood in the gap so that Cormac couldn’t enter nor see you. “Can I help you, mate? I’m trying to study.”

“I want to talk to my girlfriend,” Cormac said in as gruff of a voice as he could manage. 

His meager attempt to intimidate Theo only made him smile. He leaned his weight on the side of the door and put his other hand in his pocket. Theo was an image of cool, calm and casual. 

“Sorry? Last I checked you didn’t have a girlfriend?”

“I know she’s in there, Nott. I need to talk to her.”

“Oh, it’s a need now? Interesting.”

“How about you butt out of my relationship and let me speak to my girlfriend?”

“Since there’s no girlfriend, there’s no relationship to butt out of,” Theo said. “You found your way into the building. How ‘bout you find your way out, hmm?”

Then he closed the door and locked it, immediately followed by an anti-alohamora charm.

“He wants to talk,” you said in a soft voice.

“Don’t you even think about giving him the light of day.”

“He came all the way here… so he must actually care about me.”

“No, he cares about not controlling you. Not having you at his fucking beck and call. If he actually cared about you, he wouldn’t be posting bitches on his story and blowing you off every week.”

“Theo-“

“You deserve someone who sees your worth,” he said. He paused as his stomach clenched. “Like I do.”

It wasn’t a declaration of love but to Theo, it felt like it. For better or for worse, you interpreted it as him being your best friend and standing by that title. 

“I think you put me on a pedestal, Theo,” you said. 

“It’s where you belong.”

He said it just a little too earnestly, like he meant it more than anything. 

“Theo.” Your tone was serious. 

He sighed and sat on the bed next to you. 

Then it fell out of his mouth. 

“You need someone who loves you like I love you.”

You shifted slightly. “I mean, with that logic, I need someone who loves me more.” 

You felt stupid saying it. It sounded stupid coming out of your mouth. You cringed. You were about to stand up, tell Theo to forget about it, and leave the room. 

Then his lips were on yours and his hand was cupping your face. 

“There’s no one who loves you more.”

“Not an ax murderer?” you texted. 

“I’ve never met him. Charlie says they’re good people,” your friend responded. 

“Get his email. I’ll send him stuff.”

You didn’t vet this “James Potter” very much. Charlie was a decent judge of character. After hearing back from James and getting some logistics handled, he started asking how soon he could move in. You didn’t actually meet him until he was moving in and you were handing him the key. 

Maybe you should’ve asked for a picture of him beforehand. You wouldn’t have changed your allowing him to live with you if he was unattractive, but you could’ve prepared for how attractive he was. 

After a week of living together, you came to the conclusion that James was going to be a good flatmate as long as you continued living together. He was very respectful and caught onto your routine fairly quickly. He was friendly but not overly intrusive. Even though he didn’t have to, he’d let you know when he was going to be out late, so that if you heard someone coming in the door at 2 a.m., you’d know it was him. 

After some more time passed, he asked if he could invite some friends over. You stared at him for a few moments. 

“You know you live here too, right?” 

“Yeah but so do you. If you’d rather we don’t hang out here, I won’t offer our place.”

You weren’t sure if you would’ve asked if you were planning on inviting friends over. Although previously it had always been another one of your friends who you lived with. This was new territory. 

“Well, go ahead. I’ll try to stay out of your way,” you said. 

He laughed and smiled at you in a way that felt like sunshine. 

“You don’t need to, if you want. You’re more than welcome to join us. I promise they’re a good bunch.”

“Okay.”

That’s all you said. It was almost amusing how people kept describing that group as good people. It wasn’t exactly reassuring though. Wouldn’t everyone describe their friends as good? But then again, if they weren’t solidly good people, he might not have said you were welcome to join them. 

You weren’t sure if you were going to. Really, you had already decided that you weren’t going to. It was James’ home as much as yours and you didn’t want to impose. 

You were in your room when everyone started showing up, as you could tell through the sounds of the door opening and closing and additional voices. When you got up to get a snack from the kitchen, you had to walk by the group. They were scattered around the living room. Some people sitting on the floor, some on furniture, and two standing, one leaning against the wall and another leaning over the couch. You hadn’t been expecting such a large group. 

You also hadn’t been expecting all of them to be looking at you. You unknowingly halted all conversation with the opening of your door, even with James hissing “Don’t!” at the entire group. 

You gave them a short, tight-lipped smile before hurrying into the kitchen. James, slightly mortified, jumped up as Lily followed you. 

“Hi!” the redhead said, making you jump. 

“Hi,” you replied. You wouldn’t be impolite to James’ friends. “Did you need a drink or something?”

“Oh, no. Thank you, love.” She smiled at you as you glanced over your shoulder at her from where you stood by the fridge. “I was actually hoping you’d join us out here! If you’re not too busy doing… whatever you’re doing right now.”

“I… I don’t know. I was kind of settling-“

“So you aren’t busy? Fantastic! I think we’re about to play two truths and a lie if you’re game. Or you could just hang out. You don’t have to play, obviously. Although it’d be bloody fantastic if you did.”

“Lily.”

James stepped into the kitchen. He gave you an apologetic smile as he ran a hand through his hair. 

“What?” Lily asked, crossing her arms and straightening her back. She had such a confident air about her that seemed to challenge James. 

“You know what.”

She sighed, rolled her eyes and left the kitchen. But not before telling you, “You really should play.”

James let a few seconds pass. It was now just the two of you in the kitchen. 

“Don’t feel like you have to,” he said quietly. He knew everyone would be trying to hear what he was saying. “They just want to meet the poor girl who actually agreed to live with me.”

“Is there some horrible secret I haven’t discovered yet?”

“Some of them think so, but I’m lost on it.”

You nodded. 

“Right.” 

He didn’t leave the kitchen. You had your snack halfway prepared on the counter, but he was hoping you would come out to the living room. He had a feeling you’d really like his friends, and them you. That way he’d feel even less like he’d be taking over your space when he had friends over. James just wanted all of his friends to be friends. 

“Hang around for one game? And if you don’t want to stay longer, just leave and I’ll make sure everyone leaves you alone?” James offered. 

He hoped it was a good compromise. His friends could get a taste of who you were and then he could deal with them later. He liked living in this flat with you. He’d be damned if they messed it up by being weird. 

“Yeah, okay,” you sighed. 

You followed James out and once the group realized you weren’t leaving for your room, they cheered. 

“Sirius, you go first,” Lily said. 

Several people went, with James leaning over to say people’s names as they went. It didn’t take long until you were laughing uncontrollably with them. You weren’t comfortable enough to have a turn yourself, but you had a good time. 

You didn’t realize how easy it was to be James’ friend, not how quickly he took to you. The “new roommate” feeling left the airport not long after the first time his friends came over. They often came over, albeit smaller groups. Whenever you and James ended up in the kitchen or living room or at the table together, you talked about anything and everything. 

You were still thrown for a loop when he came out of his room looking semi-dressed up. It was not his work attire, but he was clearly going somewhere nice. However, he was only wearing a white t-shirt with two shirts in his hands. He held them up once he saw you. 

“Which one goes better with these shoes?”

“Hmm?” you hummed. 

“I thought the green one was nice, but I don’t know. And I trust your fashion sense more than the boys.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as you scanned the shirts. 

“Where are you going?” you asked. 

“Laney’s, that new lunch place off Trinity Place. Mum’s been dying to go.”

You nodded. You had heard of it. 

“Blue one. It’s a bit dressier.”

James returned your nod, tossed the green shirt back in his room and put on the blue shirt. You didn’t mention that the blue shirt would also bring out his eyes more. You half assumed he already knew that. 

Days later, he was yelling down the hall, “D’you want spaghetti with chicken or meatballs?”

You didn’t answer right away. You had to assess the situation. 

“Made too many noodles. Figured you could use dinner too,” James said when you stepped into the kitchen. 

“Oh, okay,” you said before giving your answer. 

That was only the beginning of James randomly cooking for you. Some weeks he did it more than others. But it was nice. He was a great cook. He stopped saying he made too much of something and just cooked. When he did cook, you’d eat together and he’d ask about your day. 

Sometimes it all felt straight up domestic, but it was platonic. Completely. Fully. Platonic. 

Besides being one of the hottest people you’d ever seen and an overall great guy, he was your flatmate. It’d be too weird to get a crush on your flatmate. Especially when you knew he couldn’t possibly like you back. 

You also weren’t going to hold out for James. It felt silly, given you had a guy who you knew liked you back. Nick. You met him in a cafe a couple of months ago. You’d met up and gone on dates in public, and now you were going to invite him over. It was a big step. 

You weren’t sure what Nick would think of you currently living with a guy. He might see it was a weird situation. You tried to clean up the flat a bit. 

“You doing anything on Thursday?” you asked James as you cleaned. 

“Drinks with the boys. Thirsty Thursday, you know?” He paused. “Why? You want to come with?” The gears in his brain immediately started turning. “I could invite Lily, or Dorcas and Marls? That way you wouldn’t-“

“Oh, no! No thank you,” you said interrupting him. “I was just curious.”

“Just curious” was enough for James for two days. He had absolutely no reason to think otherwise until he heard it. 

It was an accident. He didn’t means to eavesdrop, but your door was open a crack and he was going to ask if you had an opinion on dinner. 

“Nick is going to come over,” James heard you say. There was some silence. “Yeah, he’a the muggle.” More silence. “James is going out so it’ll be just me ‘n’ him. I haven’t told him my flatmate’s a bloke. I don’t know if he’ll think it’s weird or whatever.”

The next bit of silence felt louder to James. You were going to alone with some muggle in the flat? Yes, you were an adult, a witch more than capable of handling herself and a muggle. Still, something felt wrong to James about this “Nick.”

“They stay out late, and sometimes he crashes at his friends’ place. It’ll be fine.” Silence. “Alright. See you later.”

James turned around and booked it to the kitchen. If there was any chance you’d come out of your room and see him standing there, he wasn’t going to risk it. But once in the kitchen, he took out his phone to text Remus and Sirius. 

<cant make it 2morrow. srry>

His phone buzzed five minutes later with Sirius calling him lame, but James didn’t care. He wasn’t going to leave you alone with Nick. 

The next day, you got confused when James came out of his room after dinner, wearing sweats and a t-shirt. 

“I thought you left already?” you said. You hoped you didn’t sound panicked but Nick was supposed to arrive in a few minutes and James was still here. He wasn’t supposed to be here. 

“Oh, Sirius is sick so I’m staying in,” he said casually. “You look nice. Going out?”

You did look nice. You had put together an outfit that was casual and relaxed but in a way that, at least to James, was obvious that you put in effort to look that way. It wasn’t your going out look, and James knew that. 

You shook your head. “I actually have someone coming over.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. He’s supposed to be here any minute now.”

“He? You invited a boy over to our flat?” James teased. 

“You’re welcome to have girls over, if you want,” you said. 

James just smiled at you. “Noted. Well, I’ll try to stay out of your hair tonight.”

You internally sighed a breath of relief. James went to grab something from the kitchen and then he went back to his room, with the door closed. Nick arrived shortly after. 

“You look lovely,” Nick said after you let him in. 

“Thank you,” you said. “Movie sound good?”

You hadn’t actually discussed what you were going to do tonight. It really was just to hang out, you supposed. 

“Yeah. You got one picked out?” he asked. 

“I got options.”

You led him to the living room and showed him some of the newer movies you had gotten. You talked about some of the movies you’ve seen recently. He picked a comedy. 

“We can watch that one after if we’re feeling it,” Nick said, pointing to the horror option you had. 

The romantic opportunities flitted through your mind. One whole movie to get comfortable and then another that made it acceptable to curl into his side. One thing could definitely lead to another if you played your cards right. 

You put the movie into the DVD player. You and Nick got comfortable on the couch with a blanket over both of you. It wasn’t quite cuddly. There was just enough space to tempt you. 

James heard the sound of the TV and he recognized the opening song of the movie. You had watched it last weekend. He thought it was a bit funny that you were already watching it again. He managed to stay in his room for ten minutes; then he was sneaking into the kitchen. 

Crisps? Popcorn? Cookies? What would be the least romantic snack to bring out? 

James wiped his hands on his sweats and turned around. Popcorn was too noisy. Two bowls of crisps. Yes, two bowls. One bowl could lead to hand touching and then hand holding. You holding hands with Nick would only give the guy ideas. James wasn’t here for that. 

“How’s the movie?” James asked, bowls in hand, as he walked up behind the couch. 

Both you and Nick flinched before looking back over the film. You had vastly different expressions. Nick was absolutely baffled at why another guy was here and you looked borderline furious. What was James doing?

“It’s good,” you said. 

“Got you guys some crisps. Movies snack,” he said, holding out the bowls. 

“Thanks,” Nick said tentatively. “Um, who are you?”

James smiled. “Her roommate.”

Nick’s eyes flicked to you momentarily and then he echoed, “Roommate.”

“Moved in a bit ago, yeah.”

Nick hummed. He gave James a quick once over and turned back around. You could see that his demeanor had changed. This is why you didn’t want James to be here tonight; this could have been avoided and you could’ve eased Nick into the concept of James. 

“Thanks for the snacks,” you said. 

You hoped James would go back to his room. He said he was going to stay out of your way for the night so why wasn’t he leaving? He leaned against the wall with his eyes on the screen. 

“James,” you hissed. 

You jerked your head toward the hallway to your rooms, but he shook his head and waved his hand dismissively. James thought he’d supervise for a few minutes. Then he’d leave you alone. He just needed to be sure that Nick wasn’t going to try anything as soon as he left the room. 

Groaning internally, you turned back around and attempted to save the night by scooting closer to Nick. It was like he read your mind. Nick wrapped his arm around your shoulder. You could practically feel him relaxing as you seemingly picked him over James. 

It made the other boy’s blood run hot. 

This was what he was trying to prevent! 

He stood in the living room until he couldn’t take the sight anymore. He figured that if he couldn’t prevent cheesy moves being used on you in your own flat, he could prevent your heart from getting broken. James planned to talk to Nick. He just needed to figure out when. Based on that interaction, you wouldn’t like him talking to Nick so you’d have to be out of the room. 

A while later, James heard your voice in the hallway. 

“-use the toilet. Should be more crisps in kitchen, if you want. Or you can see if we have anything else you want.”

Fate was on James’ side, he decided as he listened for the sound of a door closing. Then he moved quickly. While girls usually took longer using the toilet, he didn’t have all day. 

“D’you mind if I open-“ Nick started to ask before noticing it wasn’t you who entered the kitchen. “It’s you again.”

“I do live here, mate.”

“As she failed to mention.”

James perked up at the slight bitterness in his voice. 

“Anyways,” he said, dragging out the word as he moved past Nick to the other side of the kitchen. “You better not hurt her.”

Nick turned, following James’ direction. “What gives you the impression I intend to?”

Instead of answering, James just gestured to all of Nick, and then he said, “She’s bloody fantastic and deserves the world. I could see you… left in a back alley somewhere.”

“Back alley?” Nick scoffed.

James hummed and grabbed an apple from the counter. 

“Right…”

Then James was straightening his back to stand at his full height. He moved to stand very close to Nick. 

“If she sheds a single tear, if I hear you’ve raised your voice at her, merlin forbid a hand, it’ll be me putting you in that alley,” James said, voice low yet steady. He followed it with a large bite of the apple. 

The sound of a door opening split through the tension James had purposefully created. James took that as his cue to leave. He clapped Nick on the back. 

“Good chat.”

James smiled as he passed you in the hallway. You gave him a curious look. What was he doing out of his room again?

When you got to the kitchen, Nick was putting on his coat. 

“Oh, are we not… are we not watching the other movie?” you asked. 

“I, ugh, got… a text from my… mum. She needs me.”

It was obvious he was lying. You crossed your arms and tried to not look hurt by it. 

“Right. Okay,” you said with a nod. “I’ll see you later then?”

“Yeah, maybe,” Nick said before heading to the door. Then he looked over his shoulder and added, “You should talk to your roommate.”

You stood in the kitchen for what felt like ten minutes. Just standing. Maybe if you stood there long enough, it would start to make sense.  The first movie had been good. Nick had been laughing. He had his arm around you. It was comfortable. At least you thought it was. Had James really made him that uncomfortable?

“Potter?” you asked the darkness of the hallway. 

A faint light told you his door was open. He could definitely hear you. 

“Yup?” he called from his room. 

You walked down the hall slowly. You pushed his door open to see him sitting at his desk. He had a quidditch magazine in front of him, but it was closed. He wasn’t reading it. He wasn’t even pretending to. 

“Uh, what happened to staying out of my hair tonight?”

James gave his best attempt at a forced confused expression and failed miserably. 

“What do you mean?”

“You know damn well what I mean,” you snapped. “Two bowls of crisps? And then watching the movie!”

“I didn’t watch the whole thing.”

It was a pitiful defense and he knew it. 

“What did you say to him? I thought I had rebounded from your appearance and then my date leaves, telling me to talk to you?”

“What did you have to rebound for?” James asked, purposefully not answering your question. 

“For you!” you sighed dramatically. “Just about any bloke I bring back is going to have some kind of feelings about me living with the fittest guy they’ve ever seen!”

That was exactly what he needed to hear. James grinned widely and ran a hand through his hair. 

“So you’re saying the fittest bloke poor Nick’s ever seen was just making sure you don’t end up heart broken?” he asked with far too much smugness in his voice. 

“You what?”

“Told ‘im that if he hurt you, I’d leave him to rot in an alley.”

You stared at him dumbfounded. It took you a few moments to find your voice and form a coherent thought. 

“Because that’s something roommates do?” You were exasperated so sarcasm surfaced as defense. 

You took a step back as James stood up. It did nothing. He took a step towards you and you backed into the doorframe. 

“It is when one roommate realizes he should be the only one kissing the other roommate.”

“What?” 

The gasp of disbelief was a mixture of thoughts. He couldn’t be serious. You didn’t randomly admit that to people. There was no way it was true, either. James didn’t think about kissing you. You were just the random girl who happened to have a room available and connect with him through friends of friends. This couldn’t be real. If anything, it was a very, very cruel prank. 

“Nick hasn’t kissed me,” you said after James didn’t say anything. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asked in a soft voice. 

You should’ve been furious. James ruined your date when he didn’t even know how you felt about him. He chased off a perfectly good guy. 

You should not have been nodding. But you were. 

James grabbed your waist tenderly and pulled you closer to him before allowing himself to press his lips to yours. 

So maybe Nick had a point when he said to talk to your roommate. 

Lily laughed. “That wasn’t new! Marlene was going to throw it away! You didn’t buy it from a store!”

“You said got something new. I got it. It was new to me,” you said with a shrug. You flipped through the shirts hanging on the wall. “But I just feel like my wardrobe could use a little refresh.”

Lily didn’t look convinced. As you wandered the store, she kept glancing at you as if whatever items you decided to try on would clue her in. She knew it in her bones that you didn’t think your wardrobe needed to be updated. You were looking because of something specific. 

Your phone chirped and you pulled it out of your pocket to read the text. You smiled as you typed a response. 

“Who you textin’?”

“Remus.”

The lightbulb went off in her head. 

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but are we shopping because of what Sirius sent in the groupchat?”

You kept your eyes glued to your phone. 

“What’d he send?” you asked. 

You knew what he sent and Lily was right. You just didn’t want to give her the immediate satisfaction of being right and then having to explain yourself. 

“Oh, you know, just that Lupin promises to come tonight since he’s been gone for like a month.”

“Two and a half,” you corrected. 

It was automatic. Your face burned and Lily’s lips stretched into a wide grin. 

“It is because of that!” she gasped. “You’re shopping for Remus!”

You kept walking and flipping through shirts and dresses and pants and skirts. It wasn’t like you could truthfully deny her claim. You hadn’t seen the boy you’ve been pining for for two and a half months and you wanted to try to catch his eye. So what? 

“So you fancy him?” Lily asked, keeping up with you. 

You held up a brown top and she pushed your hand back to the rail. 

“Do not pick brown. How long have you fancied him?”

“What’s wrong with brown?”

“It’s a neutral. You’ll stand out in the wrong way.” She stood in front of you and crossed her arms. “How long have you liked him?”

“Then I’ll find something better,” you sighed, trying to move past Lily. 

You didn’t have a real answer to her question. You didn’t really know when it shifted from loving him as your best friend to wishing it was more. Not that you were actually going to say anything and risk losing him completely. You’d try to get attention here and there, but if he never hinted at returning your feelings, you’d leave it at that. 

Part of the issue was that you had kissed. Twice. The first time was at a party. You were playing spin the bottle and it landed on him. It wasn’t the brief kisses that others had just to get it over, nor was it an excuse to start snogging. It was just enough for you to know what his lips felt like. 

Nothing came from that. There was minimal awkwardness as if best friends randomly kissed all the time and never talked about it. And it wasn’t for a while after that that you started thinking about it more. 

The second kiss was after Hogwarts and both of you were drunk at a bar. That night was more or less a blur. Lily had been there but she went off somewhere with James. Sirius was with some girl he met there. Dorcas and Marlene were also nowhere to be found. It had really dwindled down to the two of you. You were sitting on the same side of a booth as you rambled on about something. Remus had been nursing his drink. He was more than happy to listen to you talk and stare at you. You didn’t notice. You stopped talking to take a sip and some of the liquid remained on your upper lip. Remus couldn’t stop looking at it, and this time you noticed.

“Something wrong with my face?” you had asked.

“I can fix it,” he had said before leaning in to kiss your upper lip. 

Then you didn’t let him pull away. You kissed him back in full force and put an arm around his neck. He braced himself with an arm on the table. 

Beyond that, you didn’t remember too much of that night. Just the feeling of Remus. At some point you got home, alone, and you and Remus proceeded to not talk about it. You acted completely normal around each other like you hadn’t snogged each other in a way that you’d both be dreaming about for years. 

Lily held up a strappy shirt.

“That looks like too much work to put on,” you said. 

You kept walking past the shirts on the wall.

“How come I didn’t know you fancied him?” Lily asked, following you. 

“It’s more of a wish for a parallel universe, you know? In this reality, I’m just his friend, but in a different one, we’re something more. It’s… a fantasy I can’t get out of my head.” 

“So…” She let her voice trail off.

“So I didn’t tell anyone. I mean, come on, Lils. You’re only noticing now?” 

“You didn’t say how long it’s been.”

“Some time after fourth year. Fall. If you remember the spin the bottle game?” 

“Maybe? I think that was played at every party we went to.” 

You shrugged. “You remember it better when your best friend kisses you and then you can’t stop replaying it.” 

You and Lily started walking through the dresses. You picked up a few to try on. Lily approved of them before seeing you in them, because what would be the point of trying it on if she hated it. As you walked through the store, Lily was replaying conversations she’d had with Remus in their later years at Hogwarts. Conversations that revolved around you. 

The first one had been in sixth year. The two of them had been on Prefect Patrol. Remus had figured that if anyone could help him, it’d be Lily. 

“How do I know if a girl I’m friends with likes me as more than that?”

Lily had immediately turned to look at him with wide eyes, but Remus kept his gaze forward. 

“It’s not-“ she started to ask. 

“No! Oh, Merlin, you’re lovely and all but it’s not-“

“Okay, great. You’re great too. But…”

They chuckled nervously. 

“There’s a girl you like. And you’re friends,” Lily said. 

“Yes. We go on great. But that’s almost the problem.”

“You get along too well?” 

“She’s important to me, Lil. I can’t imagine life without her. What if I try to kiss her and it backfires completely?”

“Has she had a boyfriend?”

“No.”

“Do you know about any crushes, like at all?”

“She thought Fabian Prewett was quite the looker when we were in second year?”

“Okay, but he was so we can’t fault her for that. Um, has she asked you for guy advice?”

“No. I kind of figure she’d ask her girlfriends ‘bout that.”

“I mean, unless she’s flirting with you and you’re missing it, I can’t help you unless you give me a name,” Lily said. “Some girls are very good at hiding it.”

“But if I tell you, are you going to go poking around and give me away? That might be worse than ruining our friendship myself…”

Lily held up her hands. “Don’t tell me then.”

A later discussion would have Remus telling her it was you and giving her permission to do minimal digging. She could not give him away. So she tried. But she never got anything concrete enough to give Remus the green light. 

You and Lily had moved into the dressing rooms. It was taking Lily some self control to not text Remus to see if he still liked you. 

“So you’ve done years of pining after Lupin and all you’ve had is friendship and one kiss from a party game?” she asked. 

There was a prolonged silence as you tried on the first article of clothing you’d grabbed. 

“We’ve made out.”

The shirt was not good. You took it off. Lily had climbed the small stool in the corner of her stall to look down at you over the divider. 

“You’ve made out?” she gasped loudly. 

“Merlin, Lily! Get down!” You held the shirt up to your chest. 

“We lived together for seven years. Nothing I ain’t seen,” she said. “Now, explain yourself. What do you mean you’ve made out?”

If this was at Hogwarts, surely Remus would’ve told Lily. Unless it was so horrendous that you both swore to never speak of it again. But here you were, speaking of it. 

“Two-ish years ago? We were at the Murky Pond. We both had a bit too much and… yeah.”

Lily got down, changed back into her own clothes and knocked on your door. You sighed before letting her in. She sat down on the stool. 

“Drunk or not, he snogged you and you’re wondering if he likes you?”

“We never, you know, talked about it. I don’t even know if he remembers or knew it was me. And again, that was two years ago. Who knows how he feels about me today?”

Lily quickly scanned everything you had brought in. “That one. You’re trying on that one now.”

“Black’s technically a neutral,” you said.

“It’s different and you know it. Put. It. On.” 

Once the black dress was on, you had to agree with Lily. It was different. It was certainly better than the brown shirt you had debated earlier. You looked amazing. You tried on everything else you had grabbed, but you ended up buying the black dress. Then you and Lily went back to her place to meet some more friends to get ready for the night. 

Thankfully, Lily didn’t say anything to any of your friends as you pregamed. It was one thing for her to know that you harbored feelings for your best friend; it was another for the entirety of the female side of your friend group to know. 

The walk to the bar wasn’t long and with the sun still in the sky, it wasn’t a cold walk either. If only it was cold, then you could say your vibrating was shivering, rather than being overly excited to see Remus. Lily was the only one who noticed. She started watching you more closely, trying to see what clues she had missed. 

Some of the boys were already there when you arrived. Noticeably missing? Remus. 

Lily expected some frown, deflation, sadness, confusion, anything to come from you. Your smile didn’t waver. 

“Potter, we brought your girl to you. How about some thank you shots?” you suggested, nudging Lily gently. 

“Fine, but next round’s on you,” James said, his trademark easy smile on his face. 

“But I brought you Lily!”

“She was coming anyways!”

“All I heard is I’m not paying for the first two rounds,” Peter said. “Let’s go!”

Remus and Sirius didn’t show up until after the first round had been downed. The two of them were greeted with a roar of a cheer. 

“Sorry we’re late. Someone forgot how to dress himself,” Sirius said. 

“My mum doesn’t care what I wear. You lot do,” Remus said, taking the chair next to you. He leaned over and added, “Hi.”

“So, give us the lowdown. How’s Hope?” Marlene asked. 

“Better now,” Remus said, not giving context. 

“That’s it? That’s all we get?” James asked. “Give us some details! You’re shite at texting so at least indulge us in person!”

Remus sighed. “What do you want to know?”

“Any pretty ladies there?” Peter asked. 

You were caught a little off guard by Peter’s question. Two and a half months was more than enough time to meet someone, or reconnect. You didn’t notice the way Remus tensed and glanced at you. 

“Can’t say I was looking.”

Sirius sighed dramatically. “Ugh, boring! So you just took care of your mum the whole time?”

“That is why I went.”

“But you could’ve had fun!”

“We played cards. That was fun.”

“Moony, I love you and only wish you the best, but you are going to die a virgin,” Sirius said. “I need a drink.”

Now that everyone had arrived, the group split up. Most went to the dance floor. Others continued their own conversations at the table you had all claimed. 

“Shite at texting?” you laughed. 

“The group chat got like 10 texts total,” Remus said nonchalantly. 

You stared at him for a moment. “Only ten?”

You had not only received daily texts, per your requirement of a sign of life, but you also still had full conversations with him. You knew service there wasn’t great. That was why some days you only got one text. 

“I told you, service wasn’t great. It was better in the neighboring town.”

You smiled and took a sip of your drink that you had gotten after the shots. You didn’t say it, but you wondered if he went to the next town just to text you. That would sure be something if he did. 

You talked more about his visit to his mother. He asked how work had been. Then you were laughing. Remus thought you looked as gorgeous as ever. 

Just sitting and talking to you, never mind the dress, Remus couldn’t stop thinking about wanting to kiss you and make you his. He knows he already thinks about your two shared kisses more than he should as your friend. He can’t help it. After two and a half months without seeing you, only to come back and see you in that dress, it was taking more control to hold back than ever. 

If only he had the courage that he did the night when you were both drunk, he thought to himself. 

A little later, Mary grabbed you to bring you to the other side of the bar. Remus watched you go. Part of him felt like he should’ve followed. Wherever you went, he wanted to go, but he stayed seated and swirled his drink. Without you right next to him, the bar suddenly felt too crowded, too sticky, and too loud. At least he could still see you. 

He finished his drink and went to get a new one. He figured he would order you one too since the drink you left behind was getting watery. Remus leaned against the counter as he waited. 

Lily spotted him and joined him, ordering another drink for herself. 

“You should ask her to dance,” Lily said. She had been watching Remus and it was obvious to her that Remus still had feelings for you so she thought she’d nudge him in the right direction. 

“Her being…?” he asked, despite knowing exactly who she was talking about - you. 

“The girl you’ve been staring at.”

“Lots of guys have been staring at her.”

Remus had eyes. He could see every guy in the room who was checking you out. You looked simply flawless tonight, so really, he couldn’t blame them. 

“Lots of guys aren’t her best friend.” Lily twirled some of her hair around her finger. “She wouldn’t say yes to lots of guys. And I’m sure she’d rather dance with you than those skeezes over there.”

“Lily…”

“It’s been years and you’ve done squat. What if she’s waiting on you?” It was a theory, not an outright declaration of the truth. Lily didn’t feel bad about it. 

Remus rolled his eyes. “I think I’d realize if my best friend fancied me.”

Despite that, he pushed off the counter and headed in your direction. He wasn’t worried about the drinks. He partially wanted to get away from Lily’s berating, but he also saw Mary walk away from you so you were alone and looking back at the table where he was no longer sitting.

You smiled when you saw him approaching you. 

“Remind me what we do at bars,” he said. You both visibly relaxed in each other’s presence. 

“Drink.”

“Got that,” he chuckled. “What else?”

“Well, you and me, we talk. Obviously. Others dance.” You gestured to the dance floor. “If you can find Marlene, she’ll shoot pool with you.”

“How about we do something new. Dance with me?”

You scoffed in surprise. “Remus Lupin actually wants to dance? What did they do to you in Wales?”

Boldness struck Remus. 

“Taught me that a dress like that deserves to be twirled.”

You smiled at Remus and led him out to the dance floor. He kept a respectable distance at first. Then when the music felt right, he twirled you and he kept you closer to him. 

“Have I told you that you look lovely?” he asked over the music. 

“Not tonight.”

“You do. Stunning.”

“Why, thank you, good sir,” you said before doing a twirl. “I’d say you cleaned up nicely as well.”

Remus put his hands on your hips. “Yeah, but you always look good.”

He could see the blush blooming in your cheeks. He really hoped it wasn’t from alcohol and dancing, that maybe he had that effect on you. You were hoping that you weren’t blushing too much. You had dressed up for him and he was noticing you, which was the goal, but he was saying that you always look good? That was unexpected. Had he always noticed you?

You kept dancing and he kept his hands on you. You knew that neither of you were drunk drunk. You could maybe be considered tipsy, but Remus had only had one drink as far as you were aware. 

His hands were not planted on your hips. It was your waist, your back, your arms, your hands. It was all in a respectful manner, but it felt like too much for just friends. 

Then he changed it. His hand caressed your face and then he tilted your chin up so he could kiss you. You didn’t pull away; why would you? It was just like your second kiss with Remus. Except you wouldn’t let it end the same. 

When he pulled back, you grabbed his hand and pulled him off the dance floor to somewhere quiet. Also known as, outside. 

“We can’t do this again,” you said, which instantly had Remus deflating. 

You just kissed him back! You blushed! You complimented him! You had agreed to dance with him, and you didn’t leave him out there!

“Oh.” His voice was quiet. 

“We can’t… I need to know.”

He stared at you with a slight frown. 

“Need to know?”

“If that means something,” you said, exasperated and turning away from him. “You can’t kiss me like that and then go on like normal, as friends.”

“Wait. Wait a second,” Remus started, but you weren’t done.

“I don’t even know how much you remember of either. But the first time we kissed? Understandable. It was a party game. The second time, we were both sloshed but we still should’ve acknowledged that it happened, you know?”

Remus cut you off by kissing you again. It was brief. He needed to be able to speak. 

“I remember them both. I wish I remembered the second better, but that’s what I get for drinking, what, eight shots?” He chuckled. “I remember both. I think about them far more than I should.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I…” Remus looked down at his hands, rubbing his knuckles. “I didn’t want to risk losing my best friend.” He paused. “You didn’t bring it up either.”

You reached for his hands. You rubbed your thumbs over his knuckles as well. 

“I didn’t want to lose my best friend.”

You both looked at your hands and then he threaded his fingers with yours. 

“So what now?” Remus asked quietly. 

“I think we go back inside and drink to our official relationship. And then later you come back to my place.”

“Just me?”

“Only you.”

You knocked on the door and waited. You weren’t going to simply let yourself in. 

Good news. You didn’t have to wait long. 

Bad news. The guy who opened the door was shirtless. 

Good news. It was Sirius, James’ best friend and someone you had already met. Not surprising, he had been shirtless a few of those times too. 

“Put a shirt on. I know you own them,” you told him, entering the house. 

“Here for James?” he asked as he closed the door behind you. 

You hummed. “I was told we have to study here for the month.”

“I hate getting new pledges,” Sirius said and waved for you to follow him. 

He led you through a large sitting room and then down a hallway. You passed various people along the way. You recognized a few from campus, but you didn’t really know anyone else. 

“Prongs! Your lady’s here!” Sirius announced to the room where James, among other members of Gryffindor, was studying. 

You rolled your eyes. “Not his lady,” you corrected him. 

“But a lady, nonetheless,” James said with a smile. 

“Fine. Then I’m a lady who is going to fail the Woods practical if we don’t study.”

Peter, sitting next to James, leaned over and whispered in his ear, “I’ve got some wood she can study.”

“Leave,” James said dryly to Peter. Then he smiled at you. “You won’t fail. I won’t allow it.”

You took your spot across from James as Peter left with Sirius. James put away the homework he had been working in favor of his Magical Woods notes and review packet. You got right to studying. Every once in a while, someone passed by the table and said hi to him. You weren’t surprised that he was popular among his housemates. He introduced you to a few, people he deemed some of his closer friends within Gryffindor. They either smiled at you or shook your hand with a “Nice to meet you” and walked away - all except one. 

“Potter!” a ginger said, walking up to the table. 

“Gideon, hey!” James said. He stood up and gave him some kind of handshake-hug combination. 

When he sat down, Gideon’s eyes landed on you. He was taller than James and broader. Based on the size of his arms, you knew that he worked out more than your average guy. In addition to that, he had a handsome face paired with deep brown eyes. 

You essentially swooned on sight. 

“Don’t think we’ve met before,” Gideon said. He held out his hand to you. “Certain I’d remember that. Gideon Prewett. I play quidditch with James.”

It took you a second to shake his hand; you were caught off guard by his simple compliment. And how attractive he was in general. The few matches you attended, James never introduced you to everyone on the team, and it was difficult to gauge how attractive someone is when they are zipping past you on a broom and covered in pads. 

Then, more shyly than you had hoped to come across, you told him your name. 

“What position do you play?” you asked. 

“Beater. Me ‘n’ my brother are the best pair on the pitch since Hufflepuff’s Johnson and Boot back in the ‘20s.”

You giggled lightly. James furrowed his brow; Gideon hadn’t said anything remotely funny. 

“I’ll have to make sure to pay better attention next match,” you said. “And that is when?”

“Saturday. I’ll see you there?”

“Yeah. Definitely.”

“Wicked. See you at practice tomorrow, Potter.”

Gideon walked away and you turned around in your chair to watch him disappear out the door. 

“What was that?” James asked. 

You blinked, coming back down to earth as you turned back around. 

“What was what?”

“I’ve sent you the schedule? And you just watched Prewett leave? Bit odd.”

You felt yourself blush so you looked down at your notes to avoid meeting his eyes. 

“Shit, I didn’t mean to embarrass you. Jus’ curious, I guess,” James said. 

“It’s not… It’s fine. It’s…” You laughed awkwardly as you tried to figure out how to word it. “You… you always made it sound like Sirius was the fittest of your friends.”

James frowned. “What d’you mean?”

“Sirius, always shirtless. Countless dates and one night stands. You say it’s not a party until he’s snogged two different people?”

“Yeah. That’s one way to describe him. So?”

“So… I, hah, I don’t think Gideon is short on dates either.”

James didn’t say anything. He was trying to understand what you were getting at. 

“Is he single?”

He coughed. Then he ran his hand through his hair.

“Don’t know. Never asked.”

“Could you? You know, for me?” you asked, giving him your best puppy-dog eyes. “But don’t say it’s me asking. That’d be embarrassing.”

“I-I suppose-“ he started to say. 

You reached across the table and grabbed his hands excitedly. “Oh, you’re the best!”

The two of you managed to study for another hour before you gave up and went back to your flat. James had walked you to the door of the house and then went back to his spot. He stayed there for a while. He was trying to study for another class, but he couldn’t focus. 

“Potter, why are you still up?” Marlene asked. 

She had been passing by the study room and caught a glimpse of his messy hair. Everyone knew that when the team had morning practice, James was the first to turn in for bed. Always. 

“Hm?” He raised his eyes from his paper to Marlene. “Oh, what time is it?”

“9:45.”

“Shit,” he mumbled and ran a hand through his hair before shoving all of his things into his bag. Then he paused mid-motion and looked at Marlene who was still standing in the door. “Do you know if Gideon is seeing anyone?”

She raised her eyebrows. “Gideon? Don’t think so. Why do you care?”

“Asking for a friend.”

“Uh-huh. You know it’s fine if you play for that team, although I’m positive he doesn’t.”

“Marlene,” James said sternly. “I don’t. I am asking for a friend.”

“If that friend is that cute little thing you had in here earlier, then I’m sure Gideon will have no problem entertaining her.” 

With that, Marlene was headed to her room, leaving James to think about that. He felt a little uneasy about her comment and it stuck with him. He couldn’t shake the uneasiness. Not when he went to bed, not when he woke up, not during practice, not during any of his classes before your first shared one of the day. 

As soon as you smiled at him, it disappeared. The two of you walked to your usual seats in the History of Object Animation lecture hall. 

A few minutes after the lecture started, he leaned over and whispered, “I think he’s single.”

You hummed in confusion. “Who?”

You hadn’t forgotten about Gideon. Merlin knows you couldn’t. He just wasn’t the only hot guy on campus; exhibit A was sitting right next to you. Gideon simply showed a little bit of interest and you weren’t going to turn him down if he actually was.

“The one you asked me to ask about. The one you think is hotter than Sirius,” James said, teasing more in the second sentence. 

“And you didn’t mention me?” you asked. 

“No. Jus’ said I was asking for a friend.”

You nodded. “Good.”

A minute passed where both of you attempted to pay attention.

“So Saturday, you’re coming more for him than me, huh,” James said.

“I guess we’ll see if he talks to me after the match.”

“If? If he doesn’t talk to you after the match, I’ll put itching powder in his gear. And his bed for good measure.”

“James,” you gasped quietly as you grabbed his arm. “Don’t be dramatic!”

“He’d be a deserving, right git. Getting your hopes up and all. I mean, look at you!”

You raised an eyebrow. 

“You’re trying to play it cool, love. Trying.”

“I’m cool.”

“Then why can’t I tell Gideon you asked about his relationship status?”

“James!”

“See? Trying.”

“Shut up.”

You were blushing furiously and James thought you looked adorable. He dropped the topic of Gideon for the rest of that class. 

He occasionally threw a teasing comment your way as you went through your days together. There was something about seeing you blush and get flustered. You never had to tell him when to stop. He never pushed you too far to where you were annoyed with him. 

That didn’t explain the distinct twinge in James’ chest when he spotted you Saturday before the match started. He flew over to the stands where you were. 

“Don’t you look lovely,” he said. “Dressing up for Prewett?”

“So what if I am?l

“Never dressed up for me.”

“Jealous, James?”

His immediate thought was yes, but he couldn’t say that. He had never flirted not shown any romantic interest in you since meeting you and you hadn’t either. So why did he hate that you put extra effort in for Gideon?

“It’s just a little unfair, that’s all. You barely know the bloke and I, your very good friend, haven’t gotten anything other than a jumper.”

You laughed. “Okay James. Go win the game.”

“I will for you,” he said with a wink before flying down to where his team was. 

Neither of you could believe that James winked at you. It was the flirtiest thing he’d done to you. He touched down on the ground. 

“That your friend from the other night?” Gideon asked once James reached the circle of players. 

He nodded. “Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten her name.”

“I haven’t,” Gideon said, and then he said your name to prove it. “Just noting where I have to go after the game.”

James nodded again. Have to go. That sounded wrong. Going to talk to you wasn’t something that he should feel obligated to do. Talking to you was just what he did. It wasn’t a chore; it was a delight. 

As the match started, you tried to pay more attention to Gideon. He was right that he and his brother were an excellent team as beaters, but James kept drawing your eye. There was something exhilarating about the way he played. He flew so naturally. His accuracy was simply unmatched. Even on his off days, he flew circles around the rest of the team. 

Gideon flew up to where you were after the match, hovering at the edge of the stands like James had before the match. 

“You actually came,” he said. 

“Said I would.”

“So, what’d you think?”

“Of the match? I mean, they weren’t much of competition.”

He laughed. “What about me?”

“You’re good. And you’re right, you and your brother work good together.”

“Obviously I’m the better one.”

“Obviously,” you said, smiling. 

“Not sure if Potter told you, but there’s a gathering tomorrow at Gryffindor. If you want to come that is.”

“A gathering?” you asked. “Is that a lame way to say party?”

“Not allowed to call it that in front of the pledges.”

You nodded and said, “I’ll see how much studying I have to do.”

“Aw, it’ll be better than studying.”

“I have classes to pass. We’ll see.”

“Alright. Well, I’ll see you there.”

Gideon flew down towards the lockers and you waited for James. Except he didn’t fly up to you. You didn’t wait too long, but enough to know that he wasn’t going to show up at the stands. You descended from your spot and by the time you reached the ground, you saw James leaving the locker room. 

“Potter!” you yelled. 

He stopped. He had watched Gideon go to you after the game and that made him feel sick to his stomach. He hadn’t considered that you’d want to talk to him after Gideon. 

“Hey,” James said once you made it to him. 

“How am I supposed to tell you that you were amazing if you don’t say hi?”

He hummed, like he was thinking of a real answer. “Telepathically?”

“We aren’t twins, so that doesn’t work,” you said. “But I mean it, you were brilliant out there. Like always.”

“Thought you were supposed to be watching Gideon?”

“I did. But I’m not going to come to your game and not watch you. You’re the best bloody player in the sky.”

Pride bubbled up inside of his chest. You thought he was better than Gideon? He’d take that win. So what if you didn’t watch him leave like you did with Gideon? 

Only he doesn’t know that you do watch him leave. You have for a while and it’s much easier to hide it when he’s not looking back at you. 

“Anyways,” you said as you walked with James, not caring where you would be walking to since you wanted to talk to him. “Gideon said there was a gathering tomorrow? How come you didn’t say anything about it?”

James ran a hand through his hair. 

“I didn’t think it was your scene. Never seen you at a party before.”

“He said gathering, not party.”

“There are no pledges around. Call it what it is.” James shrugged. 

“And what if I wanted to change my scene?” you asked. “I’ve never been invited to one before.”

He laughed and you gave him a rather insulted look. 

“You’re taking a piss, right?” 

You shook your head. James stopped walking and turned toward you. 

“We have to change that. Immediately. You’re coming tomorrow.”

James said he needed to drop his stuff off at the house but then he’d meet you in the library to make sure you got your work done. Why he could go to the library today and not a few nights ago, you didn’t know. You appreciated him coming. Studying felt less draining with him around. 

On Sunday, you spent the morning with your other friends. You had one of your textbooks open on your lap, which you had intended on skimming for review but got distracted. Your friend’s shitshow date was far more entertaining. You stayed with your friends until it was time to change and get ready for the “gathering.” 

You didn’t need to knock when you arrived. Some younger students, pledges you assumed, were walking in. 

Not calling what you walked into a party seemed like lying. There was music and dim lighting with a faint scent of smoke and you could already see a couple making out. You wrapped your arms around yourself. You needed to find one of the members you knew. 

Peter recognized you before you recognized him. He handed you a drink and you felt obligated to talk to him for a bit. He wasn’t your favorite of James’ friends. 

Luckily, you only had to stumble through a minute of awkward conversation. Gideon called your name and waved. 

“It was good seeing you,” you said before crossing the room. “You are a godsend.”

“Looked like a tough conversation. And you look darling,” Gideon said, giving you a dramatic once-over. 

“I didn’t want to do too much for a gathering.”

“It’s for the pledges. I told you.”

“The pledges. And those would be everyone who looks like they’re about to pee themselves?”

Gideon laughed. “As long as they don’t…”

One of Gideon’s friends got his attention. Gideon put his arm around your waist and pulled you in the direction of his friend. You went along easily. You tried to follow along with the conversation but they kept throwing out inside jokes and names of people you weren’t familiar with. You sipped your drink and tried to appreciate being held onto by someone who was into you. 

Then your drink ran out. You motioned to Gideon that you were going to get another and you’d be back. He nodded and pointed you in the direction of the kitchen. 

The easiest smile of the night spread across your face at the sight of James. He returned it. 

“Hey! You made it!”

“I’d never live it down if I didn’t.”

“That is true,” he laughed. “So when’d you get here?”

“Half hour, forty five minutes maybe? I’ve been with Gideon.”

“And how’s that going?” James asked, trying to sound interested and happy for you. 

“It’s been okay,” you said. You didn’t want to exaggerate your experience so far to James. 

“Just okay?” 

“I don’t know his friends all that well.” 

James noticed how you had set down your empty bottle and were now hugging yourself. He couldn’t let that slide. He was about to suggest that you spend some time with him and his friends to see if that made it any better, since you did know James’ friends. 

A pledge bolted into the kitchen and tripped over something. You didn’t see what. All you knew was that you now had his drink all over you. It must’ve been a full bottle given how drenched your front feels. The pledge was mortified when he stood up. 

“Oh, shit. Sorry! I’m so sorry! So, so, so sorry! I didn’t mean to!” he said, the words falling out of his mouth faster than you think should be possible. “James, I swear it was an accident!” the boy added. 

You didn’t let James answer him. “It’s alright. I’ll dry. But, maybe let’s have a water?”

James turned and grabbed one from the fridge to hand to the boy, who simply nodded and took the bottle. James was about to commend you for being overly polite. It was a pledge and you are a guest. He should’ve been watching where he was going and showed you more respect. Then he noticed the state of your clothes.

“Damn pledges… You might dry, but you’ll be sticky. Come on, you can borrow one of your shirts.”

He took your hand and led you down the hallway and up some stairs. You briefly forgot that James actually lived in this house and all of his things were just upstairs. The room he brought you to had four beds. A big party house apparently no one got their own room. You could recall someone mentioning rooming with James earlier. 

He went over to a dresser and pulled out a shirt. 

“Thanks, James,” you said as you stepped into the room. “But, um, can I get bottoms too? He kind of got it all over me.”

“Um, yeah… My sweats’ll be a bit big though?”

“I can roll them.”

He nodded. “Okay.”

James opened another drawer and grabbed a pair of his sweats. He also handed you a towel. He stepped out of his room and closed the door to let you change in privacy. You didn’t take long. 

“I’m not going to be sticky. Happy?” you asked once you were done changing and were standing in the hallway with James again.

“I’d be happier if you didn’t sit next to Prewett in my clothes.”

You stared at him in shock. He was looking at the floor; he was unsure how he let that leave his mouth. 

“Come again?”

He shrugged. “Just a little weird to sit right next to a guy in another bloke’s clothes, you know?”

“Would you rather I sit next to you?”

He shifted and ran a hand through his hair. “I mean, yeah.”

“I sit next to you every day.”

“I know.”

“So I can’t sit next to other people? Didn’t realize you owned me…”

“It’s other people who want to kiss you!”

Once again, you were staring at James while he looked anywhere but you. 

“Other people?” you repeated. “What do you mean other people? I figured I was lucky if I had one.”

“It’s, uh, more than one.”

“And am I understanding this right? You’re one of them?”

He didn’t say anything, which told you that you were right. 

“Then why did you go through the trouble of finding out if Gideon was single for me?”

“You know, I’d love to give you an answer,” he said, “but there isn’t one. I just-“

“Are you at least going to do it then?”

“Do it?”

“You don’t want me sitting next to other guys who want to kiss me while I’m wearing your clothes? Then you do it. Kiss me.”

James stared at you for a moment. It was a chance for you to say “Sike!” To say you were just kidding. To turn around and change back into your clothes. When you only stared back, waiting, he took the few steps he needed to before caressing your face and bringing his lips to meet yours. 

In the various times that the thought of kissing you drifted across his mind, something he had always dismissed as him being horny and you being pretty and nearby, he figured you would melt into him. If he ever shared a kiss with you, it’d be soft, gentle. 

Which to his credit was how the kiss started. 

Then you kissed him back and he knew he was doomed. One hand still holding your face, James pulled you close. He kept you close as he backed up until he hit the wall. As soon as he had pulled you in closer, you wrapped your arms around his neck. It took no time for your hands to get tangled in his hair, and even less time for you to forget about Gideon. If you had thought about him, you would’ve assumed that he’d move on pretty fast and it’d be no harm, no foul. 

As the kiss escalated with biting lips and tongues going where they hadn’t before, James got lost in the heat of the moment and the hand on your waist started moving upward, under your shirt. It didn’t register right away in your brain. You were too caught up in the fact that you were kissing James and he wanted to be kissing you. But you did pull back.

“James.”

He didn’t move his hand. You were having second thoughts about if you wanted him to remove it, or if he could keep it there. 

“We’re in a hallway.”

James hummed and smiled at you. “Observant. We could change that.”

“James!”

“Sorry…” 

You looked down, and that made him take his hand out from under your shirt. You were still standing incredibly close to him. You didn’t appear to be in any hurry to move, which James was pleased with. He liked having you in his arms more than he would’ve guessed had you asked him a week ago. 

“So where does this leave us?” you asked quietly. 

“Us?” 

You wanted to roll your eyes. Of course he would reply like he didn’t know what you were talking about despite just getting jealous of you being around Gideon. 

“Us. I’m wearing your clothes, we just snogged outside of your room, which you did just invite me into.” You paused. “I feel like we crossed out of ‘just friends’ territory.”

“That is an excellent point you make.”

You waited for him to say more. He didn’t.

“So?”

“You’ll have to meet my mum.”

“Your mum decides who you date?”

He laughed and kissed your cheek. “Course not. She just needs to know that she was right.”

You raised your eyebrows. 

“She knew I’d be wrapped around your finger after she heard I invited you to one of my matches. Something about being my father’s son.”

“Huh.”

“She’ll be thrilled.”

“So we’re-“

“Dating.”