Iβve been thinking a lot about the meeting between Trump and Obama at the White House, and hereβs the thing.
Obama used to be a law professor. This is key.
Law school is so, so different from college.Β
In college, everyone expects there to be aΒ βsyllabus day,β kind of a grace period where they can show up and get the lay of the land, figure out the bare minimum that they can get away with, the TA gives everyone their office hours, thereβs an introductory lecture, and everybody leaves a few minutes early to go take a nap or something. You do the bullshit assignments, you say something in class now and then to get your participation check mark, and figure out how badly you can do on the final and still pass.Β
But see, in law school, all the methodologies youβve spent the last 17 years operating under go out the window. Day one of law school is you being thrown into the deep end of the poolβyouβve had a homework assignment for two weeks now, and itβs to read the first 200 pages of your casebook. And now itβs you and the teacher (who is usually as smug as Alex Trebek) gauging and assessing what you managed to absorb while you skimmed through all those pages of reading so you could hurry up and get to the other 150 pages of reading for your next period class, in front of 50 people who are all smarter than you. And if you fuck up, or you didnβt do the reading, you are at the mercies of not just the professor, but the silent satisfied judgment of your peers.Β
Law school is hard, and it willΒ makeΒ you feel stupid and tongue-tied and like you donβt know anything and canβt form an argumentβbecause you donβt, and you canβt. Everybody there has had a 4.0 since birth. Everybody there was the smartest kid in their class, and youβre all rabidly competing for a sliver of a chance at something down the road. Itβs petty, and savage, fiercely entrenched in a culture of formalities and ceremony, and exactly like Washington DC.Β
Yesterday when I was driving home, the NPR reporter talking about the Oval Office meeting mentioned that Trump had thought it was going to be aΒ βgetting to know youβ type meeting, but that he was surprised when Obama stretched their talk out to 90 minutes before sending him along to the Capitol building where he met with congressional leaders for moreΒ lengthy meetings and stuff he didnβt want to do.
And he hasnβt even gotten to the actual job yet.Β
So think about that as we go into this.Β
Trump walked into the Oval Office like a two-pump-chump freshman thinking it was syllabus day, and what he got was the first day of law school, and he hadnβt done the reading like everyone else had, and Professor Obama decided to put him in the hot seat.Β
This was Obamaβs chance for the most perfect revenge that would never be picked up on as revenge at all. He was gracious, politeβeverything he needed to be for a peaceful transition and a good review from the press. And that would continue when the doors were closed, because thatβs the key. Not a Come to Jesus meeting, oh no. If Obama were smartβand he is veryΒ smartβhe would have treated Trump like an equal, and brought the discussion to a level that assumes far more of Trump than anyone has so far. Assumes that heβs an adult whoβs been paying attention. Statistics, esoteric minutiae about the executive branch procedure, economic growth numbers, labor figures, domestic policies, countries Trump has never even heard of, shit that would never in a million years have been in Trumpβs campaign soundbites or digestible summaries.Β
No way to escape. No aides to remember any of it for him. Just the two of them.Β
Because thatβs what would strike a precise chill into Trump. The thundering realization that heβs woefullyΒ unprepared for the hard, boring, thankless reality of this, and Obamaβs version of a smooth transition wonβt and shouldnβt include remedial civics.Β
Thatβs what I saw when they shook hands and Trump stared at the floor instead of looking back into Obamaβs face. Heβs just figured out how little he knows about any of this.Β
And that should give you a small glow of satisfaction, because after those meetings, Trump definitely has the 1L Terror Shits. In January, the night sweats and insomnia will show up, but for these first few weeksβnothing but diarrhea and self-doubt. Β
