well, that could have gone worse. a minor victory, though. this is still an uphill battle ( and that’s just to get yourself to finally ask her about it– handling whatever answer you receive will be another battle entirely ).
‘ well, you’re right, more or less. ’ a smile is attempted. why can’t you manage to keep up with your act?
‘ basically, it’s like… well, it’s complicated, actually. say, someone from a different part of the timeline, say the future or something for this scenario, came to our point in time to change something. it would change our future, but not theirs, because the change causes a branch in time. there’s also the fact that one tiny change or choice can have huge results, for good or bad. something like the flutter of a butterfly’s wings in brazil can cause a tornado in texas. something like that. there’s a whole lot that goes into it, you know? but, uh. my focus here is the bit about branches in timelines. ’
deep breath. you can do this. it’s not that hard. it’s just a question. why are you so damn scared?
teeth grit. knees shake. forearm presses down on knees to force the shaking to end. it doesn’t work, so you ball up the edge of your hoodie sleeve and chew on it instead. that quells your anxiety a little bit. a little bit is good enough.
‘ have you… noticed anything recently? like… time repeating itself? but not entirely. things change each time… and i’ve noticed… those changes always center around you. rather, the choices you make. the things you say and do. and… it always seems to come back to the time that… the time you came to us. ’ brows furrow, gnawing gets harder until it almost makes your jaw ache.
it’s okay, you think. you’ve dealt with worse pain than this dull jawache.
‘ the… the others don’t seem to notice anything. haha… they call me crazy. ’ heartbeat goes up. that, too, almost hurts– almost burns. you’re able to keep your breathing relatively steady, if not a little shaky. why is this happening?
focus on her voice. that’s always helped. granted, she’s not the only one whose voice can calm you… but god you’re thankful for it right now.
‘ i guess, what i’m asking is… am i really the only one who notices it? am i really losing my mind? or are you aware too? i’ve… really wanted to ask for a while now, but… it sounded stupid. it still does. ’
sigh through the now-damp bit of your sleeve you’ve been gnawing on. ‘ actually, forget it. i think i’m just imagining things. job’s been keeping me up too late, i think. haha… oh, i know! i’ll get some delicious honey buddha chips and ph.d pepper! maybe play a round or two of lolol! that’ll get me right out of this funk, don’t you think? ’
your smile refuses to reach your eyes. why? why? why?
“Seven,” The name rolls off her tongue naturally, but urgently, trying to silence his rambling as it gets more and more stressed. Stilted. How long had he been holding all of this in? From the way he spoke, a long time. But how was that possible? It had only been three days...(well, nearly four now that she glanced at the clock) since she had come to this apartment, since she had joined the RFA.
Somewhere deep, though, in the back of her mind, perhaps, or maybe even in the recesses of her soul, she knew that wasn’t true. It had been much longer than that. Had it? No. She was certain her memories where linear. Four days ago she was getting ready to move, leave. She had gotten a text from a stranger. She had come here. Four days had passed.
That was what her memories showed, that is what the calendar on her phone showed. A glance out the window displayed that the seasons had not changed.
Then what was this feeling?
Suddenly, realizing she had been silently for a while now, she said his nickname again “Seven,”
“I...I’m sorry,” The apology feels foreign even in her voice, because the tone of it drips with a sorrow that she does not know. Could not know. Because frankly all of this is confusing. What is she apologizing for...? as quickly as the apology had come the reason had already left her.
Oh...that’s right. She’s sorry because she doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Because he sounds so urgent and desperate and like he’s driving himself crazy with these questions that she has no answers to.
“I don’t...know what you mean” Mi-Cha confesses, choosing to be direct for lack of way to cushion the blow. “Since I came to you? I mean, it hasn’t even been a week...”
It hasn’t, it’s been months. Possibly years.
A voice that sounds suspiciously like her own but too quiet for her to hear, it brushes over her like a breeze. “--but I believe you,”
“You’re not...you’re not going crazy,” or at least if he was, so was she. Even more so because she hadn’t noticed anything. Not until this point, at least. But the revelation felt so right. Like something she had always known. Frustrating, in that she could only recognize what he told her and not bring any new information to the table.
“It...sounds right? If that makes any sense. It probably doesn’t.” She exhaled through her nose in an attempt to focus her thoughts. “I haven’t noticed it, myself. It feels like it hasn’t been very long at all, like nothing’s changed.”
She chews on her bottom lip, uncrossing and then recrossing her legs just for something to do, the strange feeling of almost remembering something (something important) not going away. “But it’s...It sounds familiar. Like, maybe it happened in a dream.”
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