Crazy Witch

I went on a field trip the other day. This face reminded me of you, so I had to buy it.

"Good timing! There's something I wanted to give you."

I think he's only joking... but what is it? I know he's not saying it to me, but I felt a bit shocked. Seiji chose to grow cherry tomato seedlings rather than from the actual seed. Somehow, it reminded me of myself. I wonder what I'll give him on his birthday. Neighborhood gossip. Sometimes, it feels like they're laughing at us. But it doesn't bother me. I know it’ll be fine. That’s why it doesn’t bother me.

They made me wear hand-me-downs from the neighborhood girls. I wonder if they thought that by raising me peacefully, discipline would come naturally. But I became timid. Maybe I didn't get enough stimulation during my most sensitive period. Suddenly they put a black backpack on me, while I still had no idea where to go. Middle and high school, I went to all-boys' schools. I made friends, but I was unable to fall in love. My life was tortuous before I met you. I was totally shy, but everyone around me told me I was cute, and I had no problems with it... since they gave me so many things. I thought it'd be fine for me to stay that way, and when I finally realized that I was wrong, i'd already become hopelessly obtuse. When I entered the new world, I found so many things. Happy things... sad things... fun things... hard things... everything. Meeting people changes our lives. You too... were looking for that. 

"You're here, so it's fine. You did follow him to this school, after all."

The only part where I don't resemble my mom... is that I'm pretty much okay with being alone... but not because I don't like people... Oh. Things are looking pretty good. Now if only... I could grow a little taller... I bet I'll have a lot of fun when there's more out there for me to see. What's so fun about it? Please show me. I'll be watching. It's easy to be the one watching. Even when I'm alone, there are more and more people. How strange. What a small world. Or is it just around me? I get connected... with this and that. I like people. Observing them, that is.

I want mama to listen to all the things that I know that mama does not know. I want her to hear the stories that I will continue to make after today.

"I suppose there's one more thing I can teach you about. Men have a tendency to treasure their memories. As long as you get that, you'll be a little more mature."

"Have we just been admiring each other back and forth? Well, since I'm in such a good mood, you can have one more."

"Oh don't listen to him. It was because he loved his father more than me and tried to copy dangerous things. My husband wouldn't stop him, so it started to grate on my nerves... There's this chocolate candy that's shaped like a cigarette. He pretended to smoke that with his dad. His mouth was sticky all over."

I read a weird (but somehow, could be possibly true) theory on Balancing Toy when I finished it the second time around. This story’s main focus surrounds a young girl, Haru, that has lost her mother for unseen circumstances the readers do not know (we know that “she fell into a deep sleep”) and the guy who she married, Seji, takes on the role of being a step father. With all types of side stories in the story (It’s short so give it a read! Including Seji’s new love interest, family tension, importance of friendship), it being a Shoujo genre, there must be love interests, (and yes, I’m talking about that kind). The theory states, that Haru has fallen in love with Seji because of his persona/role of taking care of her (psychology: Attachment Theory), while Seji still loves her mother, he begins to see Haru filling in that role (they’re like… 12 years apart, I’m guessing.) But this doesn’t come about to be incest because they are step father and step daughter. (This theory is hinted in the story when Haru mentions that her and Seji are being gossiped among the town). In some sense, I do agree with this theory. Do I like it? No. The short read ends with Haru and Towa dancing at the (???) festival, currently after having a fight with Bonta (Haru’s on and off childhood crush). Seji’s love interest is Towa’s mother, which in some degree would make you believe that Towa and Haru see each other as brother and sister (Nah, that ain’t flying with me.) In conclusion, Bonta is very bipolar regarding how he treats Haru, while Towa is very persistent, too straightforward, and even slightly mysterious for Haru to get a grasp on. The read ends with sort of a “To be continued…” but never continues, it’s truly up for the reader to decide what Haru has chosen for herself, because in reality, we do not see our ending ourselves either, and this is why this story is a continuation of something that will never come. If I could choose an ending, I would choose the one with Haru and Towa.

“I’ll wake up thinking, can a dead person borrow someone’s body? Sometimes I do things that I can’t understand.”

“You mistook me for mama again, didn’t you? You love her so much, you even see her in your dreams. Someone’s on fire. But too bad! This is reality. I’m Haru. There’s only one of her, okay?”

“My happiness… is cooking delicious fish, and being besides Mamura, and well, there are delicious fish anywhere in the world but, there is only one Mamura. They aren’t, even worth being compared!”

“Who… do you think I am? I’m a shoujo manga editor, you know? To work in my field, you need to understand a lot about romance. And I can guarantee I’m pretty good at what I do.”

The guy’s own room doesn’t suit him at all. There’s no rhyme or reason to his stuff. This is a little isolated but, it also looks like it’s treasured deeply inside his apartment. No. It’s treasured within him, as well.

“Right?”