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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Xuebing Du
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Love Begins
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cherry valley forever

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@mandaa-duhh

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The best time.
MY INSTAGRAM | YOUTUBE
It's my 14 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

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me when i wanna talk about my special interests but i got the vampire autism where you gotta invite me to talk about smth first, otherwise i wont say shit or dont know what to say because i feel like im annoying
LMFAO
People underestimate how much it fucks you up to be subtly excluded as a kid. I would try to talk to my classmates and be met with disinterest or annoyance. The one friend I had, who I clung to and nodded along to his every word, had other friends he liked just as much or more. And his other friends didn’t care for me at all.
I look back at pictures from the time and see how separated I was from them. I remember knowing I was different. I remember posing questions about the world to the girls playing next to me and realizing that they had never asked the same ones to themselves. That the ways we thought couldn’t be more different.
I kept myself amused with my own fanatical stories and musings in my head. I would wander the playground on a circular path, imagining a friend and being sorely disappointed when it didn’t feel as real as I’d hoped.
There was a bubble separating me from everyone else, thin, and nearly invisible, but with a pearly sheen you could catch under the right conditions. I knew it was there, they knew it was there, and it changed me
Do you ever pray little things like "Thank you God for these grapes. Thank you God that I have access to clean water. Thank you God that I lived through the atrocities"
this is what's so amazing about prayer!! often first thing in the morning as I make my coffee, before I even dive into the Word, I just can't help but notice how good God is. the birds are singing. I have access to lots of food. my family is peacefully asleep. He's transformed me to be a better person now than I was six months ago.
thank God for His goodness in the little things guys<3
I personally love to thank God for making all food clean Because you know, BACON!
the bacon brainrot is real lol
They're not little btw the grapes are a huge blessing and the clean water is a huge blessing and the fact that I am still waking up is a huge blessing

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O Lord, please grant me the grace to love you above all things, to treasure you, to find all of my identity in you, and to submit all of my hopes and dreams to your wise care. Please help me to renounce everything, even the things I don’t know I cling to. Help me to entrust everything in my life into your wise and loving hands. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
“It’s about having a genuine love and the Spirit of God in you that brings change to situations and people and lives. It’s never about you being somebody in and of yourself; it’s about Him being somebody in you.”
— anon
With mercy and grace I've been embraced like no other. I gave You my heart. You gave me a coat of many colors many colors.
COAT OF MANY COLORS, Brandon Lake
Realizing the bad guy in Se7en actually didn’t do his research.

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Being overstimulated is such a weird thing to explain to people. Like "hey sorry, I'm not mad at you and this is nobody's fault and I'm not blaming anyone for it happening, I am aware this is a part of regular everyday life but I am mentally crumbling because There Have Been Things Happening nonstop for 5 hours straight back to back with no breaks, and I really need to sit down in complete silence for like 15-25 minutes, after which I will be completely fine and can proceed as normal. But if I'm not allowed to have that, I will resort to violence."
The Christian message in Lord of the Rings touched me in ways that the Christian message in Narnia didn’t and couldn’t, and it wasn’t just because its subtlety and complexity, it was because of its humanity.
Narnia says – a huge divine lion that is Jesus will sacrifice itself for you. Lord of the Rings says – ordinary people will be called on to sacrifice themselves for one another, ordinary people who are no better or worse than you, in fact you might be the one who is called. Aslan walks to his death, but he’s superhuman, he’s above suffering. Meanwhile Frodo’s suffering is visceral and human and small and sad and increasingly uncomfortable to watch, which makes him a much better Christ figure. (And of course he isn’t exactly meant to be a Christ figure, he’s the everyman, he’s your neighbour, he’s a WW1 soldier, he’s just a little guy who has to take on unthinkable suffering to save the world, which probably brings us back around to Christ, but a very human version of Christ.)
In Narnia, divine providence and intervention tends to come in the form of a huge divine Jesus lion. In Lord of the Rings, providence manifests as a new-found ability, within you, to make the right choice or to shoulder the difficult task. It manifests as a fortunate coincidence that is nevertheless built on your own, and other people’s, previous actions. And when you are entirely lost, providence manifests as another small and fallible human being physically picking you up. Yes, there are eagles, but the eagles come after salvation, not before.
And then there are C.S. Lewis’ attitudes to death. He may have changed his mind in his later writings, I don’t know, but I read The Last Battle as a teen, and remained blazingly angry about its attitude to death for about a decade, until I read Lewis’s Screwtape Letters, put two and two together, and from that point, I just felt hollow. On some level, Lewis genuinely believed it is good for a good person to die, even to die young, because then there’s no more risk of them doing a sin and becoming bad. I simply cannot accept a worldview where three young people dying in a train crash is actually good because they are going to heaven.
Whereas Tolkien’s capable of acknowledging that death and grief and loss are painful, and he makes the point that we should accept mortality not because it’s good, but because the futile struggle against death will cost us all the valuable things we could have been doing with our lives. The Silmarillion and other posthumously published writings (Atrabeth) really engage with themes of mortality and immortality, and how immortal elves are led astray by their wish to avoid change just like mortal men are led astray by their wish to avoid death. And nowhere in his writings does Tolkien resolve the Fate of Men by saying that of course they go to heaven when they die. There is no answer, no easy solution, no faith offering perfect solace, nothing to defang the moral and spiritual quandary. Mortal Men in Tolkien’s world have to live good, noble lives, and have to die good, noble deaths without any certainty of what happens after death. Tolkien has faith in God, but Tolkien’s characters have to make their choices without threat of divine punishment or hope of divine reward, which is the only way to write coherently about morality. Or people. Or anything.