veni vidi vici

anu | 18 |

future doctor (theory) | college student (practice) |

equal parts music and stories | overly caffeinated

Master List

All I need is a rabiya

MARRY ME👺🔪🥰 (SAY YES... PLIJ I BEG YOU🥺🥺)

Hayeee meri pyaari aagyi hai

As for your question...mere taraf se haan hai lekin current shareholders ko bhi poochna hai. Meri malkin aur meri dildaar @rabbdaradio @writrsblu dono ke ijazat bina main kuch nahi kar sakti 😊

Kinda sleepy Ngl I look like this:

(Its all my own fault tho for getting addicted to zanjeerain)

BUT MY CUTU PUTU TWIN HAS ARRIVED IN MY INBOX

I STARTED SEEING THINGS IN MY SLEEP TOO

now objectively speaking none of the events were horrible but I felt claustrophobic and panic throughout the entire thing

so my dream opens up with the premise that I'm getting married like at that very moment...how ik this idk but it's happening

so my mom is dressing me up in this huge traditional saree all while I'm panicking. for whatever reason idk my groom like at all so I'm asking like 2 dumb questions. all I get from that is that he just turned 19 while I'm still 18 (I was super impressed with this btw acting like he won the nobel peace prize 🙄). and other piece of info is hes indian but lives in same foreign country as me. Which leaves me with next to nothing.

and of course my brain skips the actual wedding stuff like mangalsutra but somehow we know that I'm officially married to him. And the entire time I'm getting this feeling that this is a child marriage or smth because I'm the only person confused (like a child) and all my family members are happy and dancing and feeding me random food. Even the stupid groom is happy 🤦‍♀️

next after the wedding which only the bride (me) doesn't remember, we're all sitting around in my ammammas house (maternal grandmas house) which is where my formative good memories are. Ig the marriage was conducted there? So I'm sitting on one couch alone in my big ass saree and sitting in a perpendicular sofa is my husband(?) what is the need for this social distancing idk but I feel super awkward and panicked and this dude is quiet meanwhile the family members are laughing ans giggling and dancing and doing everything on earth except listening to me

Then the grooms little brother who is a little kid and is addicted to playing something on his iPad, passed by me so I dragged him near me to bother him. So I was trying to get him to talk to me and pinch his chubby cheeks and interfere in his game, but the little baccha is an introvert and refuses to talk to me and struggles. Then Mr groom himself comes and sits next to me to try to get his little bro to behave. But instead of doing anything, he sits close to enough that our shoulders are pressed together and then I get distracted by the close proximity and his brother escapes.

Next up is...the suhagraat.

What everyone is waiting for 🙄

Ok anyway they lock us up in my childhood room tjay is technically my favoeite cousins but whatever. There I'm just sitting and guess what the groom does...

Any takers?

No?

Ok I'll tell u ->

He just stares at me and keeps his mouth shut

And for some reason I'm so scared that he's gonna force me to do smth suhagraat-ey with him so I decide to start screaming at him 🤦‍♀️

I tell him a couple things like accusing him of sexually assaulting him and then I run out of the room screaming that I'm gonna file a police complaint and my last words are smth abt how he's not a real man

Now that im awake and in my senses, I realize that my poor baby was just sitting quietly in one corner and not doing anything. He didn't even do anything when I said "TU MARD HI NAHI HAI" 🥺

Next I ignore all the relatives and run downstairs and out the gate and try to wave down an auto so I can go file a FIR against my husband who does nothing but nobody is stopping. Then that same cousin whose room we were suhagraat-ing in, arrives in an auto. Apparently she was at tuition...during my wedding? Anyway she lends me her auto uncle to go to police station and I ignore my parents begging me to stop.

Then dream ends.

In hindsight, I realize that my husband wasn't even that bad. No big age gap. Live in same county. Same culture. Good looking. Nice light brown skin. Fluffy hair. Good fashion sense. Speaks tamil. Respectful. Etc

Sadly dream me didn't realize any of this sooo

If anyone finds my husband plz send him my way and I'll treat him better than in my dream. I promise. If you're reading this, I promise to make u chai everyday and also daily hugs and no FIR.

For anyone who wants to see my gigantic wedding saree, this was the general color and vibe:

(Of course this shows how unrealistic the dream is because my ideal wedding saree is this:)

Um also the only thing I remember abt the future husband is his shirt, so this is the general idea (PLZ GIVE MY BABY BACK TO ME):

THIS IS THE EXACT PATTERN OF HIS SHIRT SO START SEARCHING PPL BRING OUT THE PITCHFORKS but don't hurt him

Thank for coming to my TedTalk everyone!