Diary of an Oxygen Thief

-Sunflowers

-The yellows and pinks of a sunset

-The first sip of hot coffee on a cold morning

-My best friends laugh

-My favorite part of my favorite song

-The color Yellow

-The sound of your voice telling me you miss me

-bagels

-long drives under the stars

-laying my head on your chest and hearing your heartbeat

I hope your heart heals

I hope scar tissue forms

Over whatever made you chose drugs over me

I could never feel as good as the Heroin

I get that now

It would call your name louder than I could ever scream

You’d be gone

Lost

Id just be a voicemail on your answering machine

Until you ran out

Or had too close of a call

Then i'd be there

Driving you home

Listening to the troubles of your soul

Because I loved you

But you loved the drugs

And I could never compete

With something that made your veins pulse

And your palms sweat just with a mention of the word

So I stopped calling

Stopped wondering where you were

Stopped waiting for you to need me again

And when you called for a ride home

Months later

I couldn't bring myself to wrap my fingers around you again and answer

I cried as I saw your calls roll in

Sobbed as I heard your voice on my answering machine

I hope it was worth it

The high I could never give you

Because of you

The sky has cried since you left