still unware of why

“My wife is the perfect woman for me and I can’t do or ask for better.” he said wrapping his arms around her tightly knowing they’d been through a lot in the past few months. He just wanted her to be happy and feel safe and secure while believing in their marriage. “You want to go to Tijuana? Really?”

“── I mean... It is still where we got married, even though it was a complete accident.” She breathed deeply, leaning her head against his upper arm. “I just feel like we need── well, maybe I need holidays and just be with you?”

“Fuck it.” El snapped towards her sister, “It’s honestly not a big deal I was simply saying what you and Jake do or more so Jake now is exciting. I’m sorry for bugging you. Don’t worry I’ll leave because after all it’s your house.” she said grabbing her bag and heading out the door. She was tired of feeling like a third wheel in her apartment she needed a new place and needed it soon. 

Jake rubbed her arms and turned to look at her face, “Sweetheart nothing has to be perfect. We love you the way you are and you don’t have to go through anything special to make our lives perfect. We have what we need and what we don’t we make it work. You’re not failing at anything, you’re human.” 

“──We’ve been together for a while now and you haven’t noticed your wife is a neurotic perfectionist woman?” Maeve whined, shaking her head to the sides. It was probably her neuroticism, but between taking care of Elliot and trying to make things good again with Jake, after the baby, she was feeling so completely lost and out of touch with herself that everything she tried to do just seemed wrong. “Maybe we should go to Tijuana.” She said, looking over her shoulders.

Jake took her tone as a warning sign as he wrapped his arms around her middle. “No one hates you sweetheart, least of all me or your sister. As for Oscar you feed him and make sure he gets outside. You’re his favorite person in this house.” Resting his chin on her shoulder her kissed her cheek gently. “Why do you feel like you’re walking on eggshells talk to me, what’s going on?” 

Mae rested her hand on his arms and leaned her head towards his. “──  I don’t know, Jake, I don’t know. I just feel like I don’t do anything right. That you both would be better off without me... I don’t really know what to tell. Just every little joke you guys do── it doesn’t always seem a joke to me. I just try to make everything perfect and I feel like I am always failing──”

Maeve sighed loudly. She was, at that moment, the bad guy. It was ridiculous to feel like that when she was just being real. Maybe her sense of humor just weren’t compatible with her sister, maybe she was just tired of taking responsibility for everything in her house, either way, her goal wasn’t to be cruel with Elliot either. “If I stop── And now I am the unreasonable that doesn’t think before saying, because the things we say have no implications, right!” Mae hissed even angrier, before jumping off the stool and collecting her belongings. “No, please, stay here, I will work in my room.”

“First of all that bottle is three dollars and delicious from Australia. I don’t know if I’d become a wine snob. I could have done beer making as well.  Second, I wasn’t blaming just you for my decisions, I was blaming you and Jake for having cool stories that I want to be in on.” El played with her hair, readjusting on the couch looking at her sister. “Third of all what’s with you? You seem awfully touchy today. Actually you seem touchy a lot lately….” El looked at her sister tilting her head to the side before shouting. “ARE YOU PREGNANT?!”

Every word of what she was saying was irritating. It seemed that no one knew her enough to know that she was controlling and although she was relatively easy to deal with, she didn’t like those little jokes that they seemed to love so much. “── No. No!” She said louder. “I am not pregnant! I am just irritated that you think I am touchy just because I think it is ridiculous that you are putting the fault on me and Jake,” she added reluctantly and sighed. “I am being my normal self, and maybe it is not my fault, but CSI. I don’t make them all that interesting.”

Jake wasn’t sure what happened he was simply giving her a hard time. “── I was giving you a hard time, Mae. Is everything all right?” Jake stood behind her rubbing her shoulders as he kissed her cheek. “Seafood sounds fine, I can get behind that.” Jake touched his head to hers as they stood there. “You and I saying ‘yes’ is on a whole other level then this.” 

She nodded. “Everything is fine. It just seems that everything I do in this house is wrong, between you and El──” Maeve paused, “next thing I know even Oscar will hate me. I just don’t know what to do, I feel like walking on eggs all the time.” Mae pointed to the kitchen. “Everything is there...”