-niko-

beg for your help.

if you know me, you know what's up -- but if you don't, hi! i'm reyah, she/they/he. i'm a 30s-year old disabled queer of color. i'm also a writer and a photographer when my brain and body allow me to be.

for transparency's sake, i'm one of four disabled queers in my household, and my roommates are also trying to crowdfund just for basic groceries and their medications.

but as is my overall usual, i have about $1,000 in bills all my own -- more than half of which goes towards paying for the car that gets us all where we need to be. my bank account is currently $50 overdrawn, and I really need to get back in to see my doctor.

obviously, i know we're moving in to the holiday season, and everyone's feeling the stress of surviving under late stage capitalism, but if you can, and you're willing, here are ways you can help me out:

buy my photography!

[Disclaimer: this takes the longest to pay out, but it makes me happy so.]

support me on patreon!

[Disclaimer: posting isn't terribly regular, but I do what I can when I can]

direct donations:

I'm eat shit

The first one is quite iconic: Riza’s throat was slit and Roy has a chance to save her - by dooming their country and committing human transmutation. And Roy would do it. He would throw it all away just to save her, even though he knows that human transmutation is an unforgivable sin. But she looks at him and signals him to Not Do It. And he doesn’t. He wants to, but he doesn’t do it. Because only minutes earlier, he hurt her again by dooming himself (and potentially the country) with his fury.  And if there is one thing Roy Mustang doesn’t want to do, it’s hurt Riza Hawkeye any more than he already has. Even if that means watching her die. Even if that means letting her go.

He respects her and their goals enough to say no.

He loves her enough to let her die.

The second one is just as heart-wrenching: after Al sacrificed himself, basically dying in the process, Ed tries to think of a way to save him. Both Hohenheim and Ling offer him a Philosopher’s Stone to bring Al back - and Ed says No. Even though he wants nothing more in life than to save his little brother. Even though there is nothing he wants more desperately than the safety of Al. He says no for many reasons - Hohenheim is his father after all, Ling needs the stone to become Emperor - but mostly he says no because he and Al promised to never use a Stone for themselves. And he respects that. He puts Al’s wish above his own desire to see his little brother again. He respects Al’s decision (his own conviction) enough to break the rules of the world to find another way.

Because he loves Al - he loves him enough not to break the fundamentals of their principles. He loves him enough to respect the integrity of their believes.

And the narrative rewards both Roy and Edward for their choice to respect the agency and bodily autonomy of their loved ones - they survive, are saved, are brought back… and neither Ed nor Roy had to force their own desire for them to live on clearly stated last wishes.

"Welcome home, dummies!"

NEVER FORGET!

3RD OCT. 11

HAPPY FMAB DAY!