13th Doctor x Dhawan!Master x Reader
Summary: Despite what the Master had told the Doctor, the reality was that in fact it was the reader who had burned Gallifrey, not him. But like always, The Doctor finds out the truth eventually.
Warnings: ANGST, Gallifrey burning, breakdowns
A/N: This is for @strawberry-tea who sent in this really cool idea! I'm not actually completely happy with the way this fic turned out, so I might go back and re-jig it a bit later. I also added a bit if Soft D!Master because I felt like the Doctor deserved at least one person being nice to her. Hopefully I did the prompt justice!
"How did she take it?" You ask, when the Master closes his TARDIS doors behind him.
"How do you think she took it?" He snaps, moving to the console and flicking some buttons. You don't exactly have a reply to that because yes, how did you think she was going to take it? He slams down the lever harder than usual, and the TARDIS makes a strange noise. He makes his way over to where you're leaning against the wall.
"She's devastated." He says. "You should see the way that she looks at me now, all that anger and pain."
In a flash, his hands are grabbing you by the shirt, shoving you against the wall.
"How can you not regret it?!" He yells, face inches from yours. If you where anyone else, you would be shaking in fear, but to you this was just Koschei being Koschei. "You burned everything we knew, everything we loved! How do you not feel sorry?"
"You're one to talk!" You shove him off you.
"Why can't you tell me why you did it? What is so terrible that you can't tell me?"
"I don't need to tell you. I just need to tell the Doctor."
"No," He says shortly, pressing a hand to his forehead. He looks like a parent telling off a child. "I need to tell the Doctor."
"Why? Why can't I tell her? Why are you insisting on taking the blame?"
"Because if she knows you did it, it will destroy her," He growls. "Hell, it nearly destroyed me. But she expect this sort of thing from me - burning planets, even our own. She doesn't expect it from you. If she learns that someone she loves so deeply and unconditionally did it... I dont even want to entertain the implications of that."
"So what, you're protecting her all of a sudden?"
"I'm not protecting her, I'm protecting others. I don't know what she'll do to the universe if she knows it was really you."
You're open your mouth to respond with some snarky comment but then...
You jump at the small voice that comes from the doorway, and your stomach drops when you see who it is. The Master visibly pales when he follows your gaze.
The Doctor doesn't look like the Doctor. She looks ill.
There's a grey tinge to her skin, and her eyes are red, mouth set in a straight line. It's the same expression she used to carry towards the end of the Time War. The usual optimism and light in her eyes is completely gone, replaced by a dull emptiness.
You didn't hear her open the door - didn't see her come in. She's frozen, a blank, wide-eyed look on her face.
"You did it," She states numbly, staring at you. "It wasn't the Master, it was you all along."
Rage flashes over her features, and suddenly she's half way across the room, running at you, and you're simply unable to move.
The Master grabs her before she crashes into you, wrapping strong arms around her tiny frame as she kicks and struggles against him. There are hot tears running down her cheeks and shes screaming at you, words you can't make out, probably in Gallifreyan. You simply stand there frozen, and watch as she punches and scratches at the Master's shoulders, trying desperately free herself from his death grip. A part of you wants him to let go, wants him to let her have at it and give you everything she's got.
You'll take everything she gives you, punches and all.
You probably deserve it, anyway.
"Doctor, DOCTOR, calm down," The Master is desperately trying to sooth her as she strains, and eventually she does stop, desolving into tears. She goes limp in his arms, pressing her face into his neck and he guides her to sit down on the steps up to the console. You can still see her anger simmering as she gasps for air, her usually neat blonde hair a tangled mess and lip bleeding from where she'd bit it.
"How, why-" She can't quite get the words out, and she staring up at you in a way that makes your hearts hurt. Now you understand what the Master meant by the way she was looking at him, except this was ten times worse.
You can see it - the confusion, the horror, the shame. She's realising that the person she had loved for so long and so blindly was now the person who had destroyed her home. Yes, she'd hated Gallifrey and had been running from it for as long as she could remember, but there was a comfort she found in knowing it was somewhere out there. She wouldn't ever be able to look at you the same way again, even after you'd explained your actions.
You had burned your relationship just as much as you had burned Gallifrey.
You want to run to her, hold her until the tears stopped, but you know she wouldn't let you so much as touch her. It breaks your heart - you had done all of this for her, and now she could barely look at you.
"I'm sorry," Is all you can say, and you find that you really mean it. You hadn't been remorseful five minutes ago, but something about the Doctor always stirred up the most painful emotions within you.
"You're not." She manages to choke out.
"I am!" You look to the Master in desperation. He's sitting next to the Doctor, his head in his hands. It strikes you how reminiscent of your childhood this is - they would sit like this in the red grass and watch you read out your latest paper on astro-physics underneath the two suns. The only difference is that back then, you were young and they were staring at you with hope and adoration in their eyes. Now you're centuries older and they're both in tears, or close to them.
"Doctor, please listen to me, just let me explain why I-"
"What reason could you have?" She stares at you incredulously. "What could possibly justify what you've just done?"
"I don't want to hear it Y/N," She spits out your real name like a curse word. "Get out of my sight."
You open your mouth to argue, but shut it when you recieve a warning look from the Master.
You had come close to the edge before, but this time you'd gone too far and toppled right over it. You'd really fucked up. Really, really fucked up.
Taking one last look at the Doctor, before you shove your hands in your pockets and turn to the door. Maybe one day she'd listen, but today wasn't it.
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