10 Angry College Tips For Incoming Freshmen
(I finished my freshman year this spring with a 4.0 GPA, an off-campus research internship, and three professors contacting me suggesting that I apply for a fulbright scholarship. Â These tips arenât coming out of my ass.)Â
1. LISTEN TO ME WHEN I SAY THIS: YOU DO NOTÂ NEED TOÂ âGET INVOLVEDâ IN STUPID CLUBS IF YOU DONâT ENJOY THEM. Â Hear âget involved! :)â for the 1000th time and just barf in your mouth a little and move on. Â If you work hard and get good grades, and socialize with people on campus when you have free time (it comes more naturally than you think) YOU WILL. Â BE. Â FINE. Â Actually better than fine. Â Youâll have time to get a real job/internship, which by the way, is what the real world wants to see you prioritizing. Â Moral of the story: Only join clubs if they help your personality thrive and feel healthy. Â Donât do them because you feel pressured. Â
2. DONâT TAKE SHIT FROM A N Y O N E. I know youâre trying to fit in and take the stance of trying to make everyone happy to make sure youâll have plenty of friends.  But you have to realize that you literally just met these people, and they just met you.  If they create an uncomfortable environment for you that makes college harder to cope with, get them the fuck out of your life. Ainât nobody got time for peopleâs high school-ass drama. Â
3. SKIP YOUR CLASSES SOMETIMES.  If you really have your shit together, it wonât matter.  Your school will say the amount of skips you can get away with before it harms your grade.  Use. Them.
4. BECOME THE MASTER OF WRITING ESSAYS IN ONE NIGHT. Â You will have to. Â Iâm telling you right the fuck now. Â And you can get an A, if you work your lil ass off. Iâve done it many times. Â
5. DONâT CARE FOR EVEN 1 SECOND WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU. Â If you wanna wear sweats and no makeup, do it. Â If you want to dress up and take time to put on makeup, do it. Â If you want to stay away from partying, do it. Â If you want to party, have a good ass time. Â If anyone has enough time to judge you, they need to be studying harder or getting a hobby. Â Make yourself comfortable and happy as fuck and enjoy your time in college worry-free.Â
6. BE THE ASSHOLE WITH A TABLET OR LAPTOP IN LECTURE.  You wonât have time to copy it all down.  Youâll be miserable.  Just trust me.  I know studies say its more effective to write stuff down for memory, but, write them out later or something.  Learned that one the hard way.
7. DONâT REWRITE YOUR NOTES IF IT DOESNâT HELP YOU STUDY. Â If you know doing that doesnât help you memorize, donât do it, period. Â Or, if you have a collossal asston of notes (like I did) it isnât even worth rewriting them all in the first place. Iâve fallen down that hole and lost motivation and time. Â Just reread them or make flashcards or whatever. Â Study for effectiveness, not aesthetic.
8. BE PREPARED FOR LAB TO GO THE âWHOLE TIME.â  Yah, youâre gonna see 3 hours on that brand-shiny-new schedule of yours and be like thereâs no way itâll go that long, right? LOL about that.  Just mentally brace yourself.  Eat and drink beforehand for the love of god we donât need hangry people handling chemicals. Â
9. COMMUTING DOESNâT MAKE YOU A LONER. Â Just. Â No. If you live close to campus, are comfortable with commuting, and know youâll save yourself MAJOR debt by doing it, do it and donât feel a fucking ounce of guilt about it. Â Itâll be some early mornings, but your fresh out of college broke ass will thank you, and youâll use your time more effectively. Â (Plus you get a non grimy shower like??)
10. LOVE YOUR NEW FINE ASS SELF. Â College is a fresh start. Â Put energy into who you have always wanted to be. Â And donât compromise that out of social anxiety and embarrassment. Â Youâll be happy and thank yourself if you step out of your comfort zone to be the person youâve always had in mind. Â