as a woman

The most powerful women throughout history were never the most beautiful. They just knew how to wield their power over everyone else.

Cleopatra controlled one of the richest kingdoms in the world and seduced 2 kings.

Zsa Zsa Gabor was a Hungarian socialite in the 1950s and wife to several wealthy men, but her true power was making people feel more elite by being near her.

Despite being fat and a rumored lesbian in the 1920s, Elsa Maxwell became a socialite, professional hostess, and social gatekeeper.

Their energy was enthralling. Their attention was intoxicating. Their love was fleeting.

The world hated them but would do anything to be near them. But why?

These women were self-possessed & self-validating. They didn’t seek your approval. They didn’t need you to like them.

They didn’t have to. Their power was wielded, not given by anyone else. The most powerful women don’t appear to need anything from anyone. That’s what makes the world want to give her everything.

It’s what makes powerful men want to possess her.

It’s what makes businesses want to pay her.

And it’s what makes other women admire her.

The best part of all is that any woman can do this.

This secret superpower is why the world feeds unrealistic beauty standards from a young age: to make you insecure.

It’s why the world gives women social rules that demand her to be supportive of everyone but herself: so you never pour into yourself.

It’s why schools teach about powerful men but negate the women who shaped our world: so you forget who you are.

The world knows your power, you don’t.

How to wield your own power:

1. First, stop making your looks your main source of value.

Your appearance should just get you in rooms. Your value is what keeps you there. Now more than ever, women are told their looks are the MOST important. Do you get better treatment based on your looks? Absolutely. But true power isn’t in free drinks and bags. It’s in your ability to influence decisions and shape the world around you. In affluent spaces, value is the currency. You must be useful or you’ll be dispensable.

This can be derived from your way of thinking, taste, cultural intelligence, or ability to disarm people. It’s likely the trait you’ve had since you were a kid.

Pamela Churchill appeared to be a typical political socialite but became the top Democratic Party fundraiser. Her ability to bring rich people in a room, captivate them emotionally, and raise money for a cause made her an asset to the men around her.

There will always be a woman prettier than you, but real power comes from being needed. The woman who is respected isn’t the most beautiful. She’s the most valuable.

2. Don’t be afraid to take up space.

Cliche? I know, but just hear me out. Women are taught to stay quiet. Don’t be vulgar. Be nice. Be liked. Be palatable. Care what people think. Yet the most powerful women do none of those things.

Kim Kardashian is one of the most hated women in America, yet has the most fans. There’s no one that won’t pick up the phone for her. Her business deals are always in her favor because they know she wields her power, gets attention, and takes up space. She built a billion-dollar family dynasty from leveraging one of the most vulnerable moments in her life.

To do this, you’ll have to get rid of your fear of being disliked and the need to be understood. The more space you take up, the less people will actually know you. They’ll only observe and admire you. You must be content with that. In fact, learn to embrace it.

3. The final advice I’ll leave you with is to worship yourself.

Depending on your religious background, this may turn you off. But it’s not what you think. Throughout history, the most powerful women weren’t seen as women at all, but deities. Rather than looking at external figures or men for your power, you place your higher self on a pedestal. You worship yourself. You become devoted to your vision. You commit to the life you say you want. You begin to see yourself as worthy.

Cleopatra aligned herself with deities by presenting herself as the living embodiment of Isis, the Egyptian goddess of motherhood, magic, fertility, kingship, and divine protection. She appeared in religious clothing associated with Isis, used temple imagery, participated in sacred rituals, and allowed herself to be shown as a goddess queen rather than just a political ruler.

By doing this, you don’t replace the God you believe in, but you embody it to the fullest.

✨Your body becomes your altar.

✨Your mind becomes a temple.

✨Your environment is the church.

You stop putting power in outside sources and realize it was in you the entire time. You just never gave it your full attention. Treat yourself like a goddess, and watch the world follow suit.

Your Turn

People don’t respect the most beautiful woman. They respect the woman who believes in her own power so deeply that everyone else starts adjusting around it.

The reason the world has admired these women for centuries is because they admired themselves. Their ability to be captivated and aware of their own power was so undeniable that the rest of the world followed suit. It’s time for you to do the same.

Self obsessed.

Get facials and facial massages. Do your skin care. Stay hydrated. Get lymphatic body massages. Keep your brows done. Exfoliate your lips. Try different hair styles. Commit to a workout routine for 9-months. Depuff your face. Get Invisalign. Wear your damn retainer. Get 7-9 hours of sleep. Eat your collagen. Avoid sugar. Do mirror work.

You don’t need likes, comments, or shares to confirm your brilliance. You don’t need numbers to tell you who you are. Validate your damn self.

Validation is the drug of the digital age. Everyone wants to be seen, applauded, and approved before they’ve even mastered their craft. The moment you depend on metrics to define your worth, you hand your power to the masses. And the masses are always late. They don’t recognize genius until it’s already in museums, until the creator is gone, or the idea has reshaped their world without their consent.

The problem today is people wait for social media to tell them what’s “cool.” They create for approval instead of expression. But true taste doesn’t seek applause.

Cultivating art, style, or thought independent of external validation is a discipline. It’s the essence of originality. You must be willing to be misunderstood. You must be willing to be early and let the world catch up. That’s what separates pioneers from followers.

When you produce something (a piece of writing, a visual, a sound) love it for the sake of loving it. Let it exist as proof of your vision, not your need to be seen.

The world will understand when it’s ready.

Vincent van Gogh sold only one painting in his lifetime. He died believing he failed. Yet today, his name defines artistic madness and genius.

Emily Dickinson wrote nearly 1,800 poems and kept them hidden, publishing only a handful while alive. Now, her words are studied as gospel in literature.

These were not creators who lacked validation. They lacked audience. And still, they created. Because real artists understand the world’s recognition is not the proof of your genius. The work itself is.

That’s why self-validation is sacred.

You cannot measure truth through public taste. The masses don’t know what they like until it’s shoved down their throats, branded, and sold back to them.

Look at what you produce as artifacts not content

Stop calling what you make content. That word cheapens creation. Look at what you produce as artifacts, not trends.

An artifact is evidence: something left behind that symbolizes your mind, your power, your consciousness. It’s the residue of your intellect. It’s what future generations will study to understand who you were and what you believed in.

When you start creating from that perspective, you stop chasing attention and start building archives. Every photo, every idea, every product becomes a symbol: a mirror of your mind, not your marketing.

Do this for yourself, and let the world admire you later.

Genius Doesn’t Compete with Algorithms

Put out the work. Release the art. Share the sound. But do it from a place of creativity, not desperation. Don’t chase algorithmic favor. You are not here to game systems. You are here to cultivate taste and lead thought.

Treat what you produce like something that will one day sit in a museum — a relic of a time when someone dared to think differently. Ensure it’s a complete reflection of your genius, not a diluted version built to please screens.

Do this for yourself.

For the love of the work. For the legacy your name will carry long after you’re gone. Let the world admire you later, when they finally catch up.

TV, social media, podcasts, YouTube, etc are meant to be consumed periodically for pleasure or entertainment. These platforms have been proven to decrease productivity and increase anxiety, depression, and self hate.

the perfect embodiment of feminine & masculine energy.

Feminine in her mannerisms and how she presents herself but rightfully masculine in her career, Amal Clooney is a beautiful representation of what it means to balance your feminine and masculine energy.

who is she?

Amal Clooney, now 44 years old, is an international lawyer, human rights activist, mother, and wife to the famous George Clooney. When she’s not representing powerful clients before international courts, she is advising political governments and individuals on legal issues. She is a brilliant woman known for her high profile cases, accomplishments, husband, and fashion. She is described as “a brilliant legal mind” and “knows her brief inside out”. Her accolades make her the ideal role model and inspiration for young women.

her background

Amal is a Lebanese-British lawyer and activist specializing in international law and human rights. She was raised in England by her educated father and entrepreneurial mother. Following high school, she studied at Oxford University and graduated with her bachelor’s before attending New York University of Law where she got her Master of Law degree. 

influenced by strong women

Amal is a product of her environment. As mentioned, she was raised by an entrepreneurial mother. Her mother, Baria Alamuddin, is an award winning journalist. Baria has interviewed some of the most notable and prominent figures in the world. Amal’s mother and grandmother both are strong supporters of women empowerment and education which you can see in Amal’s philanthropic work. Another example of being influenced by strong women is when she worked in the office of Sonia Sotomayor, the first woman of color and Latina to serve on the supreme court. She even had the pleasure of working with the judge for the United States Court of Appeals and a NYU Law faculty member. It’s obvious that Amal was fortunate enough to have examples of strong and powerful women not only in her home but in the workplace.

personality

I admire Amal for her intelligence, wit, and ability to keep most of her personal life private. Not much is said about her private life, but colleagues have mentioned that Amal has a ‘commanding presence”. This is obvious when watching her interviews — her energy fills the room. She never overshares or says more than necessary, but when she does speak it’s worth listening to. As you probably guessed, she is an intelligent woman. Fluent in English, French and Arabic. Her cleverness and well articulated speeches immediately captivates those around her.

love life

One person who was captivated by her mind is her husband George Clooney. In the world of law, she was already a celebrity but became one in the literal sense when she became involved with the well known bachelor, George Clooney. George had a long history of dating gorgeous, famous women but never settled down. He even publicly said he would never get married... this was until he met Amal in July of 2013, in Lake Como Italy.

Similar to Meghan Markle and Prince Harry, the two met through a mutual friend. This is why your connections, network, and personal brand matters — those can open more doors for you than a dating app can. While most women would fall at the feet of George, Amal didn’t. In fact, he chased her for months before they became serious. He claims he fell for her because of intelligence and personality, but I assume the chase also had a huge impact. Amal is highly intelligent and understands seduction. She knows if she were like every other woman, she would get treated like every other woman. Instead, she stayed committed to her career and mission while making time for him when she could.

In 2014, the two love birds became engaged only after a year of dating. The Clooney’s were married in Sept of 2014 by no other than the former mayor of Rome. Their beautiful multi-million dollar wedding was in Venice, Italy and was one to remember. After they said “I do”, the couple moved to a multimillion-dollar estate built on a small island in London before having their twins in 2017. Together the couple committed to philanthropic work for women’s and human’s rights. It’s rumored that they’ve donated over $22M to a variety of charities. In 2016, her and George Clooney founded Clooney Foundation for Justice. She has partnered with several other charities, such as Aurora Humanitarian Initiative, and has her own scholarship program to send young girls to college.

awards & achievements

I would love to end this off not talking about Amal’s love life but the amazing things she’s accomplished. Her list of her achievements and awards are way too long to cover so I’ll mention the few I thought were most notable. Amal was awarded the most fascinating person in 2014, the World Economic Forum’s 2016 Young Global Leader, and Time magazine’s Woman of the Year in 2022. Her fight for human rights has made her a noble activist, leader, and role model. She uses her celebrity status to shed light on political issues that may have otherwise been thrown under the rug.

Amal has shown us that you can be a feminine family woman while being successful at your career. Her brilliant mind has captivated the red carpet, magazines, and one of Hollywood’s best actors. Amal is an inspiring mother, wife, and activists. Her poise, style, and grace are just a few elements to her feminine charm. Her healthy balance of masculine energy is portrayed in her ability to relentlessly peruse her career, fight for meaningful causes, and excel in a highly competitive field.

what is it and how to exude it

Main character energy (MCE) is often confused with being narcissistic or selfish. But it’s simply the idea of putting yourself first. It’s a term, commonly referenced by women, used to describe focusing on what YOU want in life and going for it — regardless of how it may affect others. How could anyone assume something as positive and inspiring as this selfish? Well it’s because society is used to women playing the supporting role not the main character — literally & in mainstream media.

Whats a supporting character?

Being a supporting character in your own life looks like you always saying yes to obligations you truly don’t want to attend. It’s you going after careers someone else has chosen for you. It’s you taking on hobbies to please others. It’s you consistently putting your needs and desires on the shelf to accommodate other people. This may seem like a beautiful, selfless trait but it’s actually one of the worst things you can do to yourself. This behavior is lowering your self esteem and self confidence and shows the people around you that they can walk all over you.

The hard truth

In this life, no one will put you first except YOU. No one will make your happiness a priority. No one will go to great lengths to make your dream life a reality, except you. This isn’t because no one else cares about you, but because they have their own lives to focus on. It’s why Main Character Energy, shouldn’t just be a trend but a way of living. You have to treat yourself like the main character in your life because no one else is fully capable of doing that for you, except you. You can be a main character and still care for your loved ones. You can be a main character and still be compassionate. You can be a main character and still support those around you.

How to exude main character energy

Being a main character in your life means you put yourself first. It’s only saying yes to things that energetically serve you. It’s only surrounding yourself around people that have the best intentions for you. Its considering your emotional and mental well being. It’s keeping your goals and priorities at the top of your mind. Its eating foods that nourish you. It’s limiting the toxic drinks & foods you consume. It’s taking care of yourself emotionally, mentally & physically above all else.

Side affects of main character energy

When you’re the main character, your self esteem and self confidence increases drastically. You stop viewing yourself as just another girl, but as THE girl. You put yourself on a pedestal and think so highly of yourself that those around you have no choice but to do the same. When you have a high regard for yourself, you tend to attract people in your life that feel the same way about you. Exude that main character energy, apologetically. ✨

X, @luxuryandbrown

create an aura of mystery.

the less you share, the more alluring you appear.

See: Master the Art of Mystery