miik[𝓐˙]

thank you so much for reading! sending you a kiss, quick, catch it . . . ᥫ᭡

Doing it once was okay, maybe twice is tolerable. He can just bite his tongue inside his mouth if you do it thrice. But when you did it for the fourth fucking time, his rough and calloused palms, his fingers still glinting with his chrome hearts rings that he seemed doesn't want to take off because of a certain habits, flew to cover your mouth. Not in harsh manner, but rough enough for you to keep that fucking noise to yourself.

"What the fuck, woman? It's 2 in the morning? Can't we just have a decent sleep at once?" He snarled under his breath which made your laugh muffled against his hand. It's rare for you to hear him cussed or let alone utter any curse words because he believes he has an idol image to take care of even though you know, his fans knows, the group doesn't really have the idol image to work on to. But as stubborn and as playful as you are, you licked his palm making your explosive of a husband to retreat his hand away. He stared at his own hand for seconds with a disgusted expression he could ever have that made you laugh even more and as if you haven't pissed him off enough, your mouth creates another annoying moan which switched something on Bang Chan.

Unlike the first time, his hand didn't flew out to cover your mouth, but rather his hand find its way to wrap around your neck. Fingers squeezing on the side, making you gasped for air, genuine gasp, lips parted open, back arching a little, and eyes rolling at the back of your head. Nothing came out of you after that, but his fingers remained at your neck. His muscled arms pruding as he tightens his grip on your neck just a little bit with certain amount of force making him hiss. It sounded so harsh you know he's trying to control himself. He pulled you closer by your waist, you back resting against his chest, you spooning against him. And whatever possessed him that time, his hand slipped inside your pajamas, finding your already slicked folds. He swears when he found out you are not wearing any underwear beneath your pjs, and when his fingers moved a lazy drag against your slit, that's when a real moan came out of your mouth.

"There it is. That's how you fuckin' moan properly." He growls against your ear, his thick australian accent slipping from irritation amd frustration. His teeth found the tip of your ear slightly biting on it sending more pleasure through you. 3 fingers pounding inside you so rough making the bed creak just because of that. His bulge grinding against your ass that emits soft groans from him, one arm safely wraped around your waist so he could grind harder against you.

“This is what you want yeah? You want me so bad you are willing to piss the hell out of me?” You could only nod in response as your head rested against his shoulder. Your walls clamping tightly against his fingers. “Then take it. Take it and moan louder.” Oh boy, and moan louder, you did.

Safe to say, you had the best sleep that night after that shenanigans you had with your husband. And definitely won't be the last time you'd do it to him. Not that Christopher Chan Bang complains anyway.

a/n: how often do i get distracted while working on a fic? well yes. HAHAHAHA. but seriously, i am working in melting point 2.0 i promise, i just hd this thought about pissing chan off and i thought it's hot so here. i let you guys indulge yourself with this imagines.

You sigh.

“You’re not the only single one, what about your cousin?”

“He started dating someone about a month after last year’s vacation. They’re still together, so she’s coming on the trip.” Your tone switches to something less dramatic. “She’s lovely, by the way, you’d like her. Very friendly.”

Chan laughs. “So, you’re single and alone there, what’s the worst that could happen? It’s your family. ”

“They make fun of me the whole time! And if I do anything my mom doesn’t like, she’ll go ‘this is why you don’t have a boyfriend, Y/N.’ Ugh!”

“Aren’t there only four ‘older’ cousins?”

“Yes, and I’m the only single one above the age of seventeen. I’m twenty four and I am going to die alone.”

Your arm drops from your eyes and you stare up at the ceiling.

The air in your apartment is warm and comfortable. Candles burn on the table beside you, filling the house with a pleasant warm cinnamon scent.

It was always one of Chan’s favorites.

“How long until the trip?” he asks.

“Next weekend.”

“Not enough time for a dating app, huh?”

You force a laugh. “No. Can you imagine? ‘Coffee was great! You wanna come on a week-long vacation with me and my giant, loud family?’ They would run for the hills.”

“Your family is great and you know it.”

“I know, they’re just… obnoxiously close, that’s all. I love them, don’t get me wrong.” You motion your arms up to the ceiling wildly in an exasperated movement. “But if I need to listen to my aunt nitpick my appearance in passive aggressive ways to ‘help’, I might kill myself.”

Chan takes a long sip of his drink. “They’re not that bad.”

You roll your eyes. “They love you so much, what would you know? Every time I bring you around them I always get tons of questions afterwards about you. I think my cousin is in love with you.”

“Which one?”

“Lily.”

“She’s twelve.”

“Twelve and in love with you.”

Both of you sit in silence for a moment. Chan’s attention slides back to the TV. He’s looking at it, but he’s not absorbing what’s really playing.

Same with you, you’re too busy wrapped up in your thoughts when an idea hits you all of a sudden.

“That’s it!” you yell, sitting up straight. Your voice startles Chan and he almost spills his drink all over your couch.

“What? What’s it?” he asks quickly, checking his pants to make sure nothing spilled.

“You can come with me!”

“You want me to go on your family’s yearly vacation in place of a boyfriend?”

“I want you to come on my family’s yearly vacation as my boyfriend.”

Chan’s head snaps over to you, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped. You’re already looking at him with pleading eyes.

“Please, Chan!” you beg before he has a chance to say no. “Please, please, please!” you repeat over and over again.

Placing your coffee on the table, you crawl closer to him on the couch, begging over and over again.

“They already love you so much! It would be so easy ! Plus, it’s all expenses paid! It’s a free vacation to a lake house in the mountains with your best friend!”

“Felix isn’t going.” Chan teases.

You whine and grab his free hand. “No, me! Your best friend! Pretty please Chan! I’ll owe you big time!”

He stares at you for a long moment, thinking it through in his head. You’re staring at him with big, pleading, sparkly eyes. He’s never been able to say no to that look.

He sucks his teeth, head cocking to the side for a second. The hand in yours twitches and he holds it, like a faux-shake.

“Fine,” he says. “But, you owe me dinner.”

Squealing, you throw your arms around his shoulders.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He wraps his beverage-free hand around you and hugs you back. “You’re seriously the best, thank you!”

“I know, I know. Now can we please finish the movie?”

——————————————

The trunk to your car slams shut, Chan dusts his hands off and then rests them on his hips.

“You look like a dad,” you tell him while coming up to the car with your backpack slung over your shoulder.

“A dad who packed the trunk of your car perfectly.” He eyes the backpack on your shoulder. “That goes in the backseat. I’m not opening the trunk again.”

Giggling, you open the backdoor and toss it in.

“Can you drive?” you ask, batting your eyelashes. “You know how much I hate driving.”

Chan sighs and holds his hand out for the keys.

“You’re the best!” you cheer and toss them to him.

“Yeah, you keep saying that.” Chan rolls his eyes and ducks into the driver’s side of the car. “Do you have the address?”

You duck inside the car and start typing on your phone. “I should have it in my texts, one sec.”

Scrolling through your phone, you try to find the text that your aunt sent you with the address. Your family has rented the same AirBnb every year since you were fourteen and yet you could never remember the address of the place.

As you’re searching for it, a phone call from your mom comes in.

“Oh, hold on.” You say to Chan and hit the answer button.

“Hey, ma!” you greet into the phone.

“Hey, sweetie! Are you on your way yet?”

“We just got into the car, actually. We’re about to leave.”

“I thought you would’ve left an hour ago.”

“Chan got held up at work, actually. Not his fault.”

At the mention of his name, Chan perks up and looks over at you, listening to the phone call intently.

“Ah, gotcha. I still can’t believe you didn’t tell me you two finally started dating.”

“Yeah, well, it’s still kinda new,” you lie through your teeth. You look up and make eye contact with Chan. “We only became official about…”

His eyes widen and he looks around panicked. Quickly, he holds up three fingers.

“About three week-”

He moves about wildly.

“Months! Three months ago! Sorry, I’m a little distracted putting all the bags in the car.”

Chan reacts to your lie comically, his chin jutting forward, head cocking to the side. You wave him off silently. Your mother doesn’t seem to clock your panic about the situation.

“I always saw how the two of you looked at each other, it was only a matter of time, really.”

A blush crawls up your neck and turns your ears and cheeks red. Chan looks down at his lap and coughs nervously, a blush of his own making its way onto his skin.

“Anyway, we better get going, mom! You know how talking on the phone while driving is illegal and all.”

“Make Chan drive! He’s the boyfriend.”

“You’re so right… And he should do so without putting up a fuss.”

Chan motions down to himself, as if to say ‘I’m already the one in the driver’s seat’. You wave him off again, trying to focus on your mother’s voice.

“Okay, okay, I’ll see you soon, but I expect some questions to be answered when I see you, Y/N!” Her voice is teasing, but it makes your blood run cold.

“Of course, mom. I’ll talk to you later, okay? Bye, love you!”

You don’t give her a chance to answer you before you hang up.

The silence in the car is so loud, the air is so still.

“So,” you say slowly. “We need to come up with a backstory, huh?”

“It seems so.”

Another bout of silence.

Neither of you are looking at each other, you’re both facing forward, staring out the windshield.

“I’ll uh… find the address.”

“Yeah.”

You clear your throat awkwardly and scroll through your phone. Chan waits a second before starting the car.

——————————————

Chan turned one of the final corners of the trip onto the street.

“Our first date?” he asks.

“Coffee at the cafe by my apartment.”

“Second date?”

“Movies, we saw Barbie. We went out to eat afterwards. A diner.”

“When did we become official?”

“Three months ago. May 6th. You asked me after our third date.”

“And?”

“You kissed me at my door.”

“Good.”

You both pause for a moment.

“How come I can’t be the one that kissed you?” you tease him.

Chan laughs out loud and turns the car into the driveway. “As if you would ever make the first move.”

You look at him incredulously. “I so would! You’re the one who gets too nervous to do anything. I say I kissed you, not the other way around.”

“No way, I kissed you.”

Chan puts the car into park.

“Absolutely not. I kissed you first.” you reply.

“Keep dreaming. I walked you to your door, we stood there and talked for a minute. You went to walk inside, but I stopped you and kissed you.”

You unbuckle your seatbelt.

“No, after we talked, there was an awkward silence and I could see how nervous you were and how you kept looking at my lips. So, I took the first step and kissed you.”

Grabbing the door handle, you wrench it open before Chan could issue a rebuttal again.

He calls your name from inside the car and lets out a loud groan afterwards.

“You can’t have all the firsts, now can you?” you call back, walking around to the trunk.

The front door to the house rips open and two of your little cousins come tearing out of the house with happy smiles.

“Y/N! Y/N!” they both call out, sprinting up to you.

Leaning down, you scoop both of them up into a hug with both arms, giving them an equally excited hello. Both of them hug you tightly.

They’re five and nine years old, girl and boy– the youngest of the cousins.

“Look who else I brought with me,” you giggle and look over at Chan, who was watching you from the side of the car. The door still opened, his arm leaning on the top.

Both of their tiny gazes turn towards him and just like that, you’re forgotten about.

“Chan!” They both cheer and run at him full tilt.

He wraps both of them up in his strong arms and picks them off the ground.

“Hello, you two!” he coos and gives them both kisses on their heads.

Something twinges within your heart seeing him interact with the two of them that way, it goes through you like an arrow. His brown eyes are so warm and sparkly holding your two little cousins close to him.

A genuine, bright smile pulled across his beautiful face.

Chan steps away from the car and puts them on the ground, they both complain. “Come on, I need to help Y/N with the bags. I wouldn’t be a good boyfriend if I made her carry them all by herself.”

Your heart thuds again. Boyfriend.

The two kids groan and give in, running back into the house, telling everyone of your arrival.

Chan watches them for a moment before turning to look at you with a sheepish smile. You smile back and knock twice on the hood of your car.

“Come on then, boyfriend. These bags won't carry themselves.”

He laughs and grabs the bags from the trunk, arguing with you when you try to lift some of the heavier bags. Well, you weren’t going to argue about carrying something if you didn’t need to.

The cold air conditioned house was a familiar sight when you walked through the front door. One of your aunts was near the entrance when you first came in.

“Y/N, Chan, you’re here! We have you both in the room down here, I hope that’s okay.” she says, pointing to the room down the hall. It’s one of only three bedrooms on the first floor.

“Yeah! That’s totally fine, thank you.”

You smile and walk to the room, dropping your bags down on the bed.

The singular bed in the room.

Chan follows you inside the room with your bags, plopping them down on the floor by the door. You turn to look at him, he’s staring at the bed, most likely thinking the same thing that you are.

He closes the door behind you both.

“I didn’t think about this part.” you say quietly just in case someone was outside the door.

He shrugs. “Just don’t hog the blankets,” he jokes. Chan brushes it off so easily.

What you don’t know is his heart is racing just as much as yours is. His mouth has gone completely dry and he had to gulp down some nerves before jesting with you.

It’s just a bed, right? Both of you can share a bed, no problem. Not at all.

The two of you have fallen asleep on the couch together before. But, it’s not quite the same as sharing a bedroom for the next week.

“I didn’t think you would need any blankets since you’re a human space heater.” You open your one bag and pull out a few smaller things.

“You’re just jealous because you’re cold all the time.” Chan stands on the other side of the bed, plugging his phone charger into the wall.

“I’m not cold all the time.”

“You’re in a sweatshirt and it’s eighty five degrees outside.”

“We had the air conditioning on in the car.”

There’s a few knocks on the bedroom door. “Dinner!”

——————————————

Contrary to what you both originally thought, your family did not grill the two of you interrogation style about your relationship. Instead, you were met with a lot of “It was only a matter of time”.

Each time one of your family members said something along those lines, both you and Chan would grow extremely shy, faces flushing and hearts racing.

Dinner was held in the back room attached to the large kitchen, a long dining table sat in the room, benches full of your family members lined it.

There were so many of you: eight cousins, three aunts, two uncles, two parents, one sister, one brother in law, one grandmother.

This was not the first time Chan had been around your extremely large family, not at all. He’s around you all the time, especially when he can’t go home to Australia for holidays. You always invite him to your family celebrations, and each time he’s more than thrilled to be there.

Everyone was so happy that he was there; part of you thinks they’re happier to see him than you.

Dinner came and went, it was filled with laughter and stories, like it usually is. Your dad and his brothers all teased one another, bringing up stories of being young in the 70’s and 80’s.

“Let’s do a movie night!” One of your younger cousins turns to her older brother. “You’ve been promising me that we would watch Star Wars.”

“You want to watch Star Wars tonight?” he replies.

“Yes, please! Cousins movie night!" She cheers and grabs her plate. “We can set the couches up like last year!”

Chan leaned over and whispered in your ear, “Movie night?”

“There’s a den upstairs with a couple couches, we push them together to make a giant bed and all watch movies at night. Very common L/N Family Activity on vacation.” you answer, leaning closer to him. “The adults usually go to bed and all the cousins watch movies.”

“Sounds exciting.”

Both of you chuckle and smile at one another. His dimples showing. You two seem to be in your own little bubble.

Chan’s leaning so close his body heat is radiating through your clothes. The fabric of his shirt is brushing against your bare arm.

“You’ll find that there’s a certain schedule to each day, breakfast, play down at the lake, lunch, back to the lake, get ready for dinner, eat dinner, movie time.”

“I think I can get used to that.”

“You better.”

A throat clears by you. Your aunt is looking at the two of you with a playful smile. “Are you both going to help clean up or what?”

——————————————

“Dibs on sitting next to Y/N!” One of your little cousins calls out after you all finished pushing the couches together.

“No, I want to sit next to her!” Another yells out.

The youngest runs up and throws his arms around your hips, hugging you close to him. Both arms don’t make it around you all the way.

“No, me!”

You laugh and ruffle his hair. He holds you tighter and it knocks you off balance slightly.

“Come on, hon, you got to sit next to me at dinner, let someone else have a turn.” you coo down to him.

“No!” he pouts and hugs you tighter. You grimace and try to pry his arms off you.

Chan comes out of nowhere and picks your cousin off the ground in one fell swoop. “How about me, huh?” he teases and tickles your cousin with his one free hand.

Your cousin starts giggling like crazy.

“Don’t I get to sit next to my girlfriend?” he jokes and tickles him even more.

The biggest smile stretches over your face, heart warming once more.

Chan drops your cousin onto the couches, he bounces a bit, still laughing.

The tickle torture continues now that both of Chan’s hands are free. Giggles turn into cackles.

No matter how hard you try, you can’t fight the smile on your face and the feeling that stirs in your stomach. Are you ovulating? You have to be. There’s no other explanation for the flutter within your chest.

He just looks so natural like that. The teasing looked adorable.

It wasn’t until one of your older cousins came into the room before your gaze was taken away from Chan.

“Lovesick, eh?” he says in your ear.

“Oh, shut up.” You hit him in the arm.

“I know that look anywhere, Y/N. You can’t fool me.” He laughs and then walks to take his spot on the big couch huddle with his girlfriend.

Chan picks your little cousin up by the ankle and starts dragging him around. Both of their laughter was music to your ears.

“Okay, okay! Move time!” You call out to the two of them. Chan looks over at you immediately with the goofiest grin on his face.

Your little cousin groans.

“Give me my boyfriend back,” you tease and climb onto the couch.

After several minutes of figuring out seating and finding the movie on the TV, everyone was finally settled.

Chan sat directly next to you, his arm on the back of the couch behind you. Both of your legs stretched out in front of you and a shared blanket draped over you both.

The opening title sequence of Star Wars starts playing and silence falls over your cousins for the first time since you got there.

Absent-mindedly, Chan’s fingers lightly brush over the skin of your exposed shoulder from behind you. They trace small shapes lightly.

You can’t even focus on the movie in front of you, Chan’s touch is too distracting.

Your sister and her fiance sat on the other side of you. She leaned over and whispered in your ear about twenty minutes into the movie.

“You can cuddle with your boyfriend, you know.”

A flush crawls up your neck. “Yeah, of course I know that. I just didn’t want to–”

Chan must’ve heard her, his hand closes over your shoulder and brings you closer to him. Your body turns into his, head tucked underneath his chin. His body warmth seeps into you as soon as you press into him.

The cherry on top is when he presses a kiss to the crown of your hair before resting his chin on top of your head. A shockwave of goosebumps ripples through your body.

Thinking you were chilly, Chan wraps his other arm around you and holds you even closer.

Well, if he’s playing the part.

You intertwine your legs with his underneath the blanket. His heart jumps in his chest and he has to fight the urge to press another kiss into your hair.

Chan knew he was pushing his luck with the first one, but it just felt so natural, he couldn’t help himself. Every single time the two of you touch, he instinctually takes it further into a romantic zone.

Previously, he would restrain himself from advancing these moments with you, but now? He doesn’t need to hold himself back. He can let his body react naturally.

The movie continues on, whenever a younger cousin would ask any questions about the movie, one of the older kids would answer.

Whenever Chan was the one to answer, his voice would rumble deep within his chest. The later it got, the raspier it sounded.

Throughout the movie, you both just got more and more tangled up underneath the blanket. You slid an arm around to rest your hand on Chan’s chest; fingers mindlessly playing with the fabric of his t-shirt.

Chan melted into your touch so easily.

In all the years you’ve been close friends, you’ve never been this level of a human pretzel while hanging out. He’s relishing every moment of it. Your shared body heat mingling is intoxicating to him.

He’s such a tactile person, physical touch is definitely his love language.

Chan can’t remember a time he was ever this cozy while watching a movie.

One of his hands moves from your shoulder and into your hair, running his fingers through the strands gently.

Every muscle in your body relaxes when he starts scratching at your scalp lightly. His soft exhales puff out on your head. Normally, this would bother you, but instead you find it soothing.

Both of you were fighting against your eyelids towards the end of the movie. The little kids fell asleep about ten minutes before the credits rolled.

Chan squeezes you tighter for a moment before whispering into your hair, “Time for bed.”

Your heart squeezes. “I gotta help get the little ones to bed.”

“I got it,” he answers. “Go wash up and get to bed. I’ll be downstairs in a few.”

Words can’t even describe how much your heart melts at his words.

Pull it together, Y/N. He’s your fake boyfriend for the week, remember? Not your real one.

It’s Chan – Bang Chan. The same guy who held your hair each time you drank yourself sick in college. The guy who camps out at your dining room table to work because he claims the Wi-Fi is better at your apartment.

Nevertheless, you peel yourself off of him, untangling your limbs and sitting up.

“You’re the best,” you say to him with a sleepy smile.

“I know.”

——————————————

Sunlight streams in through the bedroom window and the air conditioning unit continuously hums in the room.

A strong arm squeezing tighter around your body is what drags you out of dreamland.

A searingly hot body is pressed flush against the back of yours; legs tangled up, back to chest, soft exhales blowing into your hair lightly.

The haze of sleep still has your mind in its grip. All you know in that moment is that it’s so cozy, so warm, so nice that you can’t help but press your body backwards into that serene clasp.

The arm tightens again and brings you even closer.

A nose nuzzles further into the back of your head.

Chan, it’s Chan behind you.

You should care. You should be prying his arm off your waist and scooting over away from him.

But you don’t want to. It’s too nice.

It’s so peaceful, you’re about to drift back to sleep when the sound of two separate footsteps run towards your bedroom door.

They’re so loud, it rips you from sleep and you tense up, preparing for impact.

Your bedroom door is practically flung open.

Chan jolts against your body at the noise, his eyes snap open, arm tightening around you even more in a protective manner.

He has about two seconds to get his bearings before both cousins leap onto the bed, yelling at you both to wake up.

Chan releases you and turns over onto his back with a deep groan.

You groan and squint your eyes closed, bringing the covers up over your head.

“Noooo…” you moan out.

Chan laughs and grabs one little cousin closely, hugging her close to his chest. “Are you in here to sleep in bed with us? I sure hope so since it’s still soooo early.”

She giggles and tries to fight against his strong arms. “No!” she cackles. “You have to eat breakfast so we can go swimming down at the lake!”

Your other, more calm, cousin squirms underneath the covers and cuddles up to you. Slinging an arm around him, you keep your eyes closed and try to let your mind drift off again.

This is not the first time he’s done this, and it most likely will not be the last. It breaks your heart thinking about the year he feels like he’s too old to do this.

Chan is practically wrestling with your cousin next to you. She squeals when he turns on his side with her encased in his arms.

“Chaaan!” she giggles.

After a few moments, he lets her go and she clambers off the bed.

“Come on, Chan! Come sit next to me at breakfast!” She pulls on his hand closest to the edge of the bed.

He laughs and turns his head to look at you. You’re fast asleep again with your younger cousin asleep in your arms.

Chan’s heart slams against his ribcage and his stomach does a cartwheel.

Your sleeping face is so peaceful, and the way your little cousin has the same hair color as you had the cogs in his mind turning.

What if that was your kid in your arms, not just a cousin?

What if it was his?

His eyes flicker all over your face.

Something stirs in his mind, shooting down his spine. If it wasn’t for your other little cousin yanking on his arm over and over again, probably would’ve watched you for a few more moments, allowing his mind to roam into dangerous territory.

——————————————

“You’re staring.” Your aunt sits next to Chan with a plate full of food.

He’s camped out on the back porch of the cabin. It overlooks the wooden stairs that lead down to the dock hanging over the lake.

You’re lounging out on a floaty, pina colada in your hand– courtesy of him. He had walked it down to you only a few moments ago.

When it was announced that it was lunch time, you told Chan you wanted to work on your tan without worrying about your cousins splashing you every five seconds.

Maybe making you a frozen drink was just an excuse to see your face light up when he brought it to you. Maybe it was an excuse to watch the water droplets slide over your body up close.

Chan clears his throat and tears his eyes off your lazing form. Clearly, he’d been caught staring at your bikini clad form.

She nudges his arm playfully. “Don’t be embarrassed, it would be weirder if you didn’t stare, you know.”

Your family can be so crass sometimes.

Chan laughs and takes a bite of the sandwich on his plate. “It’s just nice to see her relaxing for once.”

“Has she been working herself into the ground again?”

“She never stops.”

Your aunt nods and looks back down at you before taking a bite of her own food. “Also helps that she looks good in that bathing suit.” She pauses. “Damn, your kids will be good looking.”

Chan chokes on his bite of food, his body jerks forward and he slams his fist into his chest to try and get it down.

Your aunt pats him on the back a few times, laughing at his expense.

“What?” She questions with an evil chuckle. “Don’t act like you haven’t thought about it.”

“We’ve only been together for three months,” he wheezes out, still hitting his chest. The clump of food is sitting in his throat.

“And?”

“It’s too early to think about stuff like that,” he lies through his teeth.

You’re not even his. You’re not. This week will end and you’ll have to go back to just being best friends.

He’ll have to pretend that he wasn’t fake sleeping for the last hour before you woke up just to have his arms around you for a little while longer.

“Please.” Your aunt rolls her eyes and goes back to her food when another family member joins the table.

Chan takes a long swig of water before letting his eyes flicker to you once more. Your free hand hangs down in the water, head tilted back to dip into the cool lake, exposing your long, beautiful neck.

In his swim trunks, his cock twitches and he takes an even bigger drink of water.

——————————————

The torture continues endlessly for the two of you.

It’s the fourth night when it’s just you and Chan left awake.

Rain is pouring against the windows outside, the fireplace is lit, TV playing something in the background.

“I’m never going to get to bed.”

“I told you that you shouldn’t have had coffee with dessert,” you tease Chan, nudging his arm.

“Your uncle offered me a cup and I panicked.”

“You don’t even like coffee.”

“I know!” He whined.

You laugh at his expense. “Come on,” you tug on his arm. “You promised you would play pool with me.”

“When did I say that?”

“Literally this morning!”

“Fine, fine.”

He allows you to pull him off the couch with a dorky smile on his face. He loves giving you a hard time for no reason at all.

The pool table sat in the front room, just a few steps away from your bedroom.

Every time the two of you had gone to play pool, other family members would get in the way and pull one of you two in another direction.

Tonight was really the first night you both had to yourselves.

“You break,” you tell him once everything is set up. He nods and lines up his shot. After a second, he hits the cue ball perfectly into the cluster and all the balls scatter along the table, but nothing sinks into the pocket.

“Pity,” you tease him.

“Pity,” he repeats, mocking your tone.

Laughing, you bend over and line up your own shot. From across the table, Chan watches your form bend over, his lip pulling between his teeth mindlessly.

You hit the ball and sink one in.

With a cheer on the quieter side, you look at him with a smirk. He rolls his eyes playfully as you line up another shot.

The game continues just like this for a bit. Both of you going back and forth, missing most shots, but also nailing some good ones.

You’re tied at the end, racing to try and sink the 8-ball before the other person.

Leaning over the table right in front of him, you try and set up your aim.

“Wait,” Chan says quietly before you can pull the pool stick back to take your shot.

He leans down over you, pressing his back into yours, arms coming around you. He guides your aim to hit the cue ball differently.

The entire time, your heart rate is increasing exponentially.

“Just a bit more to the left,” he whispers in your ear. Chills rip down your body and you gulp. His voice sounds so low and sensual.

His hand over yours adjusts with tiny, miniscule movements. He keeps changing the aim a bit to the left, then a bit to the right, like he’s prolonging the contact.

Behind you, his hips are pressed into yours. It’s taking every ounce of willpower and control for him not to get hard in his sweats.

Especially, since in this position, he potentially could–

“Pull back,” he rasps. You follow his instructions immediately. He helps guide the pool stick back, hesitating for a moment. His chest inflates with a deep breath.

He breathes in the smell of your shampoo.

“Shoot,” he exhales.

With his guidance, you both shoot the ball, standing up quickly to watch it bounce off the 8-ball and then sinking into the corner pocket.

You cheer and jump up, turning around to face him directly.

“Take that!”

When you turned to face him, he hadn’t backed away yet. You’re practically nose to nose with Chan. A gasp catches in your throat from his proximity.

And yet, he still doesn’t back away. He continues to stare at you, his eyes dart from yours, down to your lips, then back up to your eyes again.

“Y/N,” he breathes out.

You swallow nervously and hold his eye contact.

Chan’s jaw clenches once, his hands ball into fists at his sides. Every single ounce of constraint is being tested within his body right now.

Cracks are going up the dam of his self control.

You’re not moving away; why aren’t you moving away from him?

He watches your eyes flicker down to his lips once and that’s all it takes for his mind to snap.

Chan lunges forward, grabbing your face with both of his hands and smashing your lips together. You let out a surprised noise against his mouth, your pool stick clattering to the ground.

Every bit of pent up aggression from the last few days is poured into the first kiss.

His hands aren’t on your face for long. He can’t keep still, sliding them all over your body; into your hair, down your sides, grabbing your hips, he’s everywhere.

“Fuck,” he growls against your lips. “Fuck, I’m sorry, Y/N. Shit.”

Even though he’s apologizing, he can’t stop himself. He can’t stop slotting his lips over yours, devouring your very being.

Chan’s eyebrows are pinched together painfully. He’s pinning your body against the pool table with his hips.

You grab at his shirt and pull him closer.

“Shut up,” you say in between heated kisses.

“But I–”

“Shut up.” Your tongue runs over his bottom lip and his mind whites out. Every rebuttal fell from his mind, through the floor and into the Earth.

You wrap your arms around his neck, bringing his face even closer to yours as he licks into your mouth. With each turn of your heads, your noses brush against one another.

Chan runs his hands down your body and grabs underneath your thighs, picking you up and placing you on the pool table.

Your legs part and he stands in between them, never leaving your lips once.

As he runs his hands up your legs, he squeezes your bare thighs every few inches. It makes your core clench and body tingle.

Your fingers run up through his hair, grabbing tightly and pulling. Chan moans into your mouth and moves his hands to grab at your waist, fingers curling into the fabric of your shirt.

“Chan,” you whisper on his lips. He responds with a grunt. “Need you.”

God.

His hands fly to your legs again, grabbing you by the knees, he yanks your hips forward. Your clothed core comes into direct contact with his erection.

“I can give you exactly what you need, baby.” he nips your lip with his teeth. “I can take good care of you, yeah?”

Trailing his fingers up, he toys with the waistband of your shorts. At the same time, he moves his kisses down your neck. You tilt your head back to give him more access.

“Wanna take these off, babygirl?” he moans when you roll your hips into his.

“Yes, please.” you hiss in response.

Lifting your hips, he grabs the fabric and slides it down your legs, tossing them onto the floor with the forgotten pool stick.

Kisses trail lower and lower down your neck as he lowers to the ground.

Chan pulls away to kneel onto the ground.

His eyes are heated and strong when they meet yours. A dark scarlet color covers his cheeks and down his neck, disappearing into his sleeveless shirt.

Both of his hands grab at your thighs when he looks down at your glistening cunt. You’re absolutely soaking wet by now.

Since the moment he helped you line up your shot, you felt your panties dampening.

Wasting no time, Chan leans forward and runs his tongue from the bottom of your slit all the way up to the top, swirling around your clit and sucking gently.

Your hand flies up to cover your mouth, the other rests on the table behind you to keep your balance.

He repeats the action again, this time with more fervor and you squint your eyes shut, head tossing back from the pleasure that rips down your spine like a zipper.

Chan’s hands tighten around your thighs, eyes staring up at you and studying each reaction closely.

You taste so fucking good. He can’t get enough of you. His tongue greedily scoops up your juices, licking around your clit to feel you grind into his face.

His cock throbs with each moan, each whine that makes it through your fingers held tightly over your mouth.

After one long suck on your clit, Chan dips his tongue inside you, licking at your walls. Your eyes roll back into your head, the hand over your mouth flies down to grip at his hair.

He can’t help but smirk into your folds.

Every single moan is music to his ears.

Slowly, he inches his fingers over and when he moves his tongue up to your clit, he slides a finger into you, immediately curling it up to hit that spongy spot inside you.

“Jesus fuck–!” you cry out as quiet as you can manage.

It doesn’t slip your mind that you’re quite literally in a house full of relatives who could wake up and come into the front room at any moment and see the two of you.

But the fear just adds an extra layer of arousal to you.

“Does that feel good, babygirl?” Chan mutters into your cunt. “Does it feel good to have my fingers inside you?”

He thrusts his finger in and out slowly, those brown eyes studying you like a predator studies prey.

You bite your lip, eyes closed, and nod your head.

Chan adds a second finger and your head tosses back again. He can feel you clench down hard on his fingers when he licks your clit in long, even strokes.

A thin sheen of sweat covers your body.

“Chan,” you whine.

“Yeah, baby?” he teases, licking up slowly, the pace of his fingers is equally as slow. But, regardless of the pace, he’s still coaxing you towards the edge of an orgasm. It’s building slowly, you can feel it in the pit of your stomach.

“Shit,” you buck your hips into his face when he does one particularly hard thrust.

“Use your words, little girl.” He bites your thigh and then goes back to your folds. You clench around him hard at the name.

How are you supposed to use your words when your voice keeps getting caught in your throat? When every time you think you can open your mouth, a sultry moan tumbles out.

“N-Need you,” you manage to strain out.

A devilish smile pulls at his lips. He begins to thrust faster with his fingers, licking your clit quicker.

“Need me?” He asks in between licks. “You need me?”

Veins are popping in your neck from straining to keep your voice down.

“Yes, fuck!” You hiss out. “ I need you.”

In between his legs, Chan can feel his cock weeping with precum. His mind is so clouded with lust he can barely think straight.

Desperately, he wishes that you didn’t have to keep your voice down. He wants to make you scream.

Faster and faster he thrusts and licks at your soaking cunt, greedily tasting your juices.

Your thighs twitch on either side of his head the closer you get to your orgasm.

“Chan,” you grab his attention by yanking on his hair. He grunts and looks up at you through his lashes, lips still devouring you. “Inside, inside. I need your cock inside me.”

Your words go straight to his dick, he licks at your cunt a few more times before standing to his feet quickly to lock your lips together, fingers still buried inside you.

When you taste your own slick on his tongue, your eyes roll back in your head and you clench around him. Chan smirks into the kiss, curling his fingers up.

He’s relentless. Tongue sliding over yours, moans being eaten up by a greedy mouth while his fingers fuck into you.

With more strength than you thought you had, you pry Chan’s lips off yours by pulling his hair back.

“If you don’t fuck me in the next thirty seconds, I’ll pin you down and ride you until your cock can’t cum anymore.”

An exhale is punched from his chest. His mind whites out. Chan’s mouth drops open and his fingers stutter within you.

Did you really just say that? That sounds like a fucking dream.

“Babygirl,” he growls darkly. “You have no idea what you’re asking for.”

Your eyes darken and you pull his hair again. “Fuck me until I can’t walk, Chris.”

Chan rips his fingers out of your cunt, grabs both of your hips and roughly pulls you off the pool table.

He fists a hand in the back of your hair and spins you around, shoving your head down, bending you over completely.

You’re lucky you had half a mind to put your arms out to rest your weight on your elbows.

Using his one foot, he knocks the inside of yours outwards to spread your legs even more.

“Fucking look at that,” he marvels, running his free hand up your ass and kneading a handful. After a second he reels back and brings his hand down with a painful smack.

Your one hand flies to your mouth to cover the squeak that you make.

“Bent over, soaking wet cunt just fucking waiting to take my cock.” His hand tightens in your hair. The other hand rips his sweatpants down to take his cock out. “What a good girl you are.”

Chan can’t remember a time he’s ever been this hard.

Casting a look over your shoulder, you look back at Chan. His eyes are blown out, lip pulled in a sneer as he fists his cock, staring directly at your fluttering walls clench around nothing.

“You wanna fill me up, Channie?”

His eyes snap up to yours with a predator-like stare. His hand stops pumping his own cock, hell, he even stops breathing.

Chan’s jaw clenches, every ounce of self control is being drained. How much more of this can he fucking take before he passes out?

“What?” His voice is so strained and hoarse.

Your eyes narrow and you wiggle your hips tauntingly. “Come on, Chan.”

Chan’s eyes darken. He fists your hair and shoves your face down on the table and slams his cock inside you.

Your mouth stretches open in a silent scream, but you don’t let the noise make it out of your body.

Chan’s eyes roll to the back. You feel so fucking good.

“Holy shit.” He moans out. “Jesus fuck you’re so fighting tight.”

He wastes no time, pulling his cock out to slam back inside you. Your back arches and hips press into his to meet his thrust.

Each sharp wave of pleasure shoots down your legs and into your toes.

Small gasps and whines make their way through your lips.

Chan leans down, yanking your hair back to pick your head up slightly. His face comes down next to yours.

“You like this, yeah?” He whispers harshly. Thrust after thrust slams against your cervix. “You like when it’s rough?”

Closing your eyes tightly, you keep your mouth shut, trying to nod with his hand so tightly wound in the crown of your hair.

“Better be quiet, then. Don’t want someone coming out and seeing you look like a cum hungry, whore.”

Over and over again he fucks into you.

After one harsh thrust, your mouth drops open and before you can moan loudly, Chan’s free hand covers your mouth tightly.

“Feels that good to have my cock inside you, huh? Can’t control that pretty mouth, you’re so fucked out.”

You whine and nod again. Nails digging into the felt of the pool table underneath you.

Hot, white pleasure is coursing through your veins. You’ve never been fucked like this in your life.

Chan leans down more and bites at the side of your neck, lapping at the skin and leaving small marks that will fade by the morning.

“You’re fucking lucky you have to be in a bathing suit in front of your family tomorrow. Otherwise I would leave my fucking mark all over you.” He bites, but doesn’t suck. “Make sure everyone knows you’re mine.”

Another whine is stopped by his hand.

“I have a better idea, babygirl.” He bites your earlobe, pace slowing down within you. Instead, he thrusts deeper, you can practically feel him within your gut. “I’m going to do exactly what you said, yeah? Fill you up? Make that pussy sloppy with my fucking load.”

Your hips jerk back into his to try and encourage him to pick up the pace. Chan only tightens his hold in your hair.

“You’re going to take whatever I give you, every last fucking drop. Even after I pull out, I’ll stuff you with my fucking fingers so nothing gets wasted.”

Arching your back, you press into him more.

“You want that, huh?” He growls, biting your ear. His pace picks up gradually, each thrust rougher and faster than the last. “You want my seed inside you?”

You nod pathetically.

“You want me to fuck a baby into you?”

His thrusts start growing erratic.

You never expected him to be this talkative during sex. But he hasn’t shut up once.

Another nod accompanied with a whine comes from you. You’re absolutely drowning in pleasure.

“Gunna carry my kids, got the fucking perfect hips for it, yeah? You’ll look so fucking hot all pregnant with our kids. Fuck.”

He’s so lost and fucked out, he can’t stop his mouth from running, spewing all his fantasies.

Moving his hand from your mouth, he trails it down to grab at your throat.

“Chan!” You moan out, licking your dry lips.

“Can feel you clenching, babygirl. You gonna cum for me? Gunna cream on my cock? Suck up my cum and hold onto it with this tight fucking pussy?”

“Yes yes yes yes.” You pant over and over again. “Kiss me, kiss me, please”

When you turn your head, your lips smash together.

The coil in your gut is seconds from snapping.

You bite Chan’s lip and pull back.

“Fuck me full, daddy.”

Every muscle in his body tensed and his thrusts turn into something animalistic. The hand in your hair is so tight your scalp is screaming.

“Say it again.”

“Fu-huck,” is all you’re able to manage.

“Say it again.” He barks in your ear. You’re not going to be able sit down tomorrow.

“Daddy.”

A bite to your neck.

“Again.”

“Daddy! Fuck me, daddy!”

“Holy shit.” He whines in your ear. Hearing you say that makes him feel fucking insane. His body is acting on its own.

With a few more thrusts both of you are thrown over the edge at the same time. Your cunt clenching around him so tight, Chan can barely breathe.

His cock spurts and sprays within you, painting your walls white.

Every single sensation feels so good you think you leave for body for a few minutes. Your orgasm hit you like a ton of bricks.

His entire body is wrapped around yours. Grunts in your ear keep you grounded.

You feel so full.

Chan came inside you so much that it’s leaking out and dripping down the inside of your legs.

He pants heavily into your ear.

Releasing your neck, he lovingly runs his hand down your side, caressing your hip, massaging circles into the bone.

His hand slides around and cups your lower stomach tenderly.

Slowly, he unwinds his hand from your hair, kissing at the roots he’s been relentlessly pulling on. He scratches and rubs at your scalp to ease the ache.

But still, he hasn’t pulled out.

Chan kisses the top of your head and down to your face, kissing the cheek he’s able to reach.

You can’t catch your breath.

“Y/N,” he whispers into your hair.

You hum back to him, eyes still closed in bliss.

“I love you.”

Your heart jumps in your chest, Chan feels you clench around him.

“I love you too.” It falls from your lips so easily, like it’s been sitting there for so long, just waiting to be heard.

Both of your heads turn to kiss one another.

It’s so ungodly sweet for the events that just took place minutes ago.

His lips are so soft and plush, especially from being swollen from your steamy kisses.

Inside you, you can feel his cock twitch. Is he…?

Breathlessly, you pull away from his sweet kiss.

“Are you still hard?” you pant.

Sheepishly, he smiles and ruts into you. A moan catches in your throat.

The night before he left for Seoul, you told yourself over and over again that you were going to confess to him. That you weren’t going to let him leave for stardom without knowing how you felt. 

And if he didn’t feel the same, then the distance would help. 

And if he did… then who knows what would happen. 

But, when the moment came. And Jeongin was hugging you goodbye in his childhood bedroom, you froze. 

“Jeongin, I need to tell you something,” you murmur into his chest during a tight hug. 

His hand runs down the back of your hair, his nose digging into the top of your head to smell your coconut shampoo. 

“What is it?”

Your heart was beating so fast, you thought it might explode. With the way your ear was pressed against his chest, you’re able to hear his heart thudding against his ribs as well. 

He’s probably just nervous about leaving, that’s all. 

Every thought flies from your head. Not a single word of your practiced speeches in the mirror come to mind. 

He’s leaving. He’s leaving. He’s leaving. 

“Y/N?” Jeongin tries to catch your attention by squeezing you tighter. 

“Just…” you trail off, blinking the tears away from your eyes. Your throat constricts and gets tighter and tighter. “Just don’t forget about me when you’re famous, okay?”

Jeongin rocks you both from side to side, a thoughtful hum coming from his throat. 

“I don’t think I could forget about you even if I tried, Y/N,” he whispers into your hair. “I’ll text you every chance I get, FaceTime and calls too. You know I will.”

The desperation in his voice causes the tears to finally fall down your cheeks. The other half of your soul was leaving. 

Who was going to walk to school with you? Split another menu item with you so that you both could have two different things? Watch scary movies with you and launch popcorn everywhere?

“I know, Jeongin.” A hiccup shakes your chest. “You’re going to be famous before you know it. And you’ll have other famous people lining up to be your best friend.”

“Yeah, well, that spot is already taken.”

Jeongin pulls away from you slowly to look down at your tear-ridden face. 

“No amount of distance will change that, okay? I’m serious.”

You bite your lip and look down at the floor with a pathetic nod. 

Two fingers hook under your chin to bring your eyes back up to his. They’re glossy and brimming with his own unshed tears. 

“Cross my heart,” he hushes and draws an ‘X’ over his chest with his free hand. 

“Cross my heart,” you sob and mirror the action. 

“Now, stop crying. You know you’re an ugly crier.”

“When are you leaving, again?”

-------------------------------------

It’s embarrassing to say, but you did have little faith in Jeongin to keep the promise. 

But you’ll be damned. Because he did so to the best of his abilities. 

No, you two were not attached at the hip anymore, sipping soda through the same straw. But you remained as close as ever. 

Conversation never dulled over texts. 

Sure, there would be periods of time where you would only hear from him once or twice a day. But that’s normal, especially with longer distance friends. 

Also, with a schedule like his, it’s a miracle that you get to hear from him at all. 

The first year was the hardest. When your birthday passed and he wasn’t physically in the room with you at midnight for the first time, it felt like a dagger to the heart. 

Yes, he was on FaceTime with you, but it wasn’t the same; and you both knew it. 

Life continued. It didn’t stop in his bedroom like you thought it would. 

The ache faded. You adapted. He adapted. But your friendship remained constant. 

-------------------------------------

“America?” Jeongin asks bewildered on the phone. 

“It’s a full ride, Jeongin! I’d be stupid not to accept it.” 

You’re laying on your bed, painting your nails with the phone in between your shoulder and your ear. 

“I mean, yeah, but like… didn’t you also apply to the University of Seoul?”

“I did, but they’re not offering me a full ride. You know my family’s financial situation, I have to go where the money is.”

“But… but what about plane tickets and such? Wouldn’t the cost just balance out?” he stutters. His tone sounds strained and choked. 

You almost wish you were on FaceTime right now so you could see his expression. He was never good at hiding secrets from you, you can read him like a book. 

“Not really… I’d probably just… live there for four years and come back when I’m done,” you mumble and then blow on your wet nails. “Jeongin, I really wasn’t expecting this type of reaction…”

The sadness of your voice can’t be helped. 

Jeongin had no idea you applied for the photography program at the California Institute of Arts. It was on a whim that you sent your application in. 

He makes a choked noise on the other end of the phone. “I-I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m happy for you, I really am! I’m over the moon excited! California! That’s-“ he clears his throat. “That’s incredible.”

He’s crying. Yang Jeongin is crying right now. 

You sit in silence for a moment and stare blankly at the wall in front of you. With each word that comes through the phone you can feel your heart breaking. 

“I can’t believe it!” He continues with his fake happiness. “California! Woo… just- just like in those movies we used to watch to-together!”

Clenching your jaw to stop your own tears, you pull the phone away from your face and tap the FaceTime button. 

The line rings a few times before you hear Jeongin gasp and stutter even more. 

“I have to go, Y/N. Chan is calling me to do something!”

“I didn’t hear—“

“Bye, Y/N!”

The line beeps three times to signal he hung up. Your phone displays the failed FaceTime call. 

Numbness floats through your chest for a moment before something harshly tugs on your soul. 

He was expecting you to come to Seoul. To come closer to him, wasn’t he? 

You drop your phone onto your bed and continue to sit there, staring into space. 

Yes, you wanted to go to Seoul with him, you desperately wanted to do that. 

But, you need to think in the long run here! Four years longer away from him in exchange for a lifetime free of debt. 

It’s only four years, max.

Tears prickle your eyes and you grit your teeth to try and stop them. 

Shit, Jeongin. Come on. 

-------------------------------------

You went to America. You made the hard choice, but the right one. And you know it, too. 

Jeongin knew it too. Hidden underneath all of the grief of you moving even further from him, he was endlessly proud and happy for you. 

But now, instead of a two hour train ride, you were an eleven hour plane ride away. Your day was sixteen hours behind his. 

Now, if he texted you and asked what you had for dinner, you would tell him about last nights’ meal or what you were thinking for later. 

There were only about two hours a day where you were able to talk at the same time and it was killing him slowly. 

When your classes for the day were ending, he was waking up for the next day. When you were getting ready for bed, he was finishing lunch. 

If he wanted to FaceTime you at the end of his day, it was the middle of your work day. 

You were losing each other. 

He was able to do two different cities in the same country, but two continents was its own animal. 

Jeongin would lay awake in bed at night, knowing you’re up and moving around. It would haunt him while he tossed and turned. 

Because in his mind, you’re also the one that got away. You were the only reason he almost didn’t audition to become a trainee. 

But, your entire life, you talked about attending the University of Seoul for college. So, he bargained with himself and became a trainee because eventually the two of you would be together. Right?

No.

Now, you’re in America. You’ve been in America for two entire years. 

Making new friends, meeting new people, experiencing everything without him. 

The knife twisted in his gut when he started noticing the same name floating around your conversations when you spoke about friends. 

Ryan. 

It was always ‘Ryan said this’, ‘Ryan did that’, ‘Ryan showed me this’. Jeongin wanted to scream and pull his hair out. 

It was only a matter of time until he got the phone call he was dreading. 

-------------------------------------

Jeongin had just sat down in the living room of the shared dorm when his phone rang. His seven other members were flitting in and out of the room. 

They all knew you very well. Jeongin talks about you so much they would swear you were everyone’s childhood best friend. 

The few times you were able to visit him in person before leaving for America, everyone always got along famously.

He answered your FaceTime call immediately. 

“Hey!” you say as soon as you see his face. “Are you busy right now?”

“No, not at all. We don’t have anything until later today. What time is it?” Jeongin looks at the clock. “It’s almost 9 PM by you, what are you getting ready for?”

You placed your phone down on your desk. “Well, ah— that’s actually why I’m calling you, I need your advice.”

Felix and Seungmin both walked into the living room, talking quietly and sat down on the couch opposite him. 

“What’s up? Are you okay?” Jeongin asks. 

Both the other boys perk at his tone and look over. 

“I’m um… going on a date tonight. Ryan had asked me out with him tonight. So I wanted your advice on what to wear, since you’re a fashion God.”

The floor beneath him crumbled. His heart fell through the sofa and into the Earth. Even his fingertips go numb. 

A date? You were going on a date? With Ryan? You were going on a date with Ryan. 

You were going on a date. With Ryan. 

“Jeongin?” You ask again when he doesn’t answer for a few moments. His eyes are completely unfocused and spaced out. 

He snaps out of it and clears his throat. “What um— What did you have in mind? It’s getting chilly out, right? Maybe wear a sweater? What about that cable knit one I got you?”

“Jeongin it’s LA! It’s always 70 degrees here.”

“But the restaurant might be cold.”

“I’ll bring a jacket then.” You laugh at him, unaware at the absolute anguish he was feeling. “I was thinking something like… you know that black skirt? That with this new tube top I got aaaand my knee high boots.”

“No.” He answers quickly, your face falls. “Why don’t you do the top with jeans?”

“It’s a nice place.”

“M-Maybe a dress then.”

“Jeongin.” 

Seungmin And Felix were watching everything unfold in front of their eyes. It was like a car crash, they couldn’t look away. 

Jeongin kept going, “I really liked that long sleeved red one you wore for Christmas last year.”

“Jeongin..”

“And if that doesn’t work I just think the sweater is the best option here.”

You stay silent, letting Jeongin finish his ramblings. 

There’s a solid fifteen seconds of silence between the two of you before you spoke up on the other line. “Are any of the other boys in the room with you?”

Jeongin immediately looks over at Felix and Seungmin. “Yeah, Min and Lix are here.”

You nod a few times, refusing to look at the camera. 

“I gotta go, Jeongin. I’ll text you later, okay?”

“Y/N.”

“Bye. I’ll text you when I get home safe.”

“Y/N, wait!”

Three beeps signal the end of the phone call. 

He sits there for a long moment, just holding his phone in his hand before he drops it onto the coffee table. 

His heart is shattering into a million pieces. 

Jeongin buries his face in his hands, elbows resting on his knees. 

Both of the other boys sit there, unsure of what to do next. They glance at each other and then back to Jeongin, who hasn’t moved. 

“Jeongin…” Felix calls out gently. 

The boy lifts his face up from his hands and looks over at his friends. “What am I supposed to do? A date. She’s going on a date. And I’m on the other side of the world.”

His throat bobs with a gulp and he pulls at his pants anxiously. 

“Jeongin.” Seungmin tries to grab his attention. “I think she was just looking for support.”

He’s right. He’s completely right, but Jeongin is so blinded with jealousy he can’t think straight. 

“I’ve loved her since we were thirteen and she’s going on a date with someone else.”

“You don’t even know if it will last.” Seungmin tries to comfort him. 

“They’re already super close, she talks about him all the time, it’s always ‘Ryan, Ryan, Ryan’. He’s her new best friend, not me. She was supposed to come here, to Seoul, not go to America. And we were going to.. we were going to–” He chokes up and can’t get it out. 

Jeongin abruptly stands up from the couch and snatches his phone off the table. 

“I’m going for a walk.”

And with that, he was gone. 

-------------------------------------

He won’t answer any of your texts or calls. 

It’s been two weeks since your date with Ryan and you still haven’t heard from Jeongin. 

It feels like a giant punch in the gut. 

All you want to do is talk to him but he’s nowhere to be seen. He hasn’t even sent you a text to say he’s busy or when he can finally talk again. 

Just radio silence. 

You thought about texting one of the other members to try and get through to him, but it feels so high school that you decide not to. 

All you want to do is talk to your best friend. 

But he doesn’t want to talk to you, it seems. 

It has to be because of the date. There’s no other explanation behind it. Everything was fine until you told him you were going on a date. 

You’ve been here for two years now! Did he expect you to stay single forever?

Just because he has a dating ban, doesn’t mean you do too. 

The more you think about it, the angrier you get. The smoldering ashes of your rage don’t dim. Not one bit, they just simmer and flicker on. 

It all bubbles and reaches a boiling point one Friday where you’ve had entirely too much to drink. 

Your friends dragged you out to a frat party where you drank yourself stupid. Nothing eventful happened at the party, but when you stumbled into your apartment and you were left alone with your phone, it all hit a head. 

[March 3 11:48 PM] 

Y/N: I’m home safe.

[March 4 4:22 PM]

Y/N: How’d your day go?

[March 5 7:31 AM]

Y/N: Jeongin please talk to me. I have so much to tell you

[2:01 PM]

Y/N: I saw a cute lil baby Fox on my way to class this morning, made me think of you :) 

[March 13 6:12 PM]

Y/N: You’re just going to keep ignoring me, huh?

[March 19 3:58 AM]

Y/N: YanG Jeongin. 

Y/N: you can’t fucking  ignore me forever 

Y/N: or maybe you can. 

Y/N: is that what you want???? Me to be gone????? All these fucking years of friendship down the drain????

Y/N: well fuck you too, I guess 

[4:02 AM]

Y/N: I got hired for your stupid fucjing group’s world tour. For when you come to America

Y/N: I fucking begged my professor to give me the gig for a project. It’s an internship. Was gunna see you next week and everythinfg 

Y/N: surprise, asshoke

Y/N: and now you won’t fucking talk to me. Do you realize how petty you’re being? How childish? Over what? A guy?????? I cant fucking back out now, my professor would kill me. 

[4:09 AM] 

Y/N: the whole tour I was gunna spend with you

Y/N: fuck you, Yang Jeongin. 

Y/N: and your stupid fucking childishness. 

Y/N: why cant you just be fucking happy for me for once. 

Y/N: it took me so long to get over you. Why do you keep doing this to me? 

[4:14 AM]

Y/N: Was I supposed to wait forever?

-------------------------------------

Jeongin stepped out of the shower and looked at his phone. 

Fifteen unread messages from you. It’s 4 AM in America, why are you awake right now?

He was so embarrassed over the way he acted two weeks ago that he couldn’t bring himself to talk to you. 

But my god, he only made it worse. 

Jeongin goes through every single emotion while reading your texts. You were going to be one of their photographers for the Manic tour? 

You were going to travel with them?

His thumbs quickly tap his phone and as he’s about to click the phone call button, he freezes in his tracks. 

‘It took me so long to get over you. Why do you keep doing this to me?’

‘Was I supposed to wait forever?’

His entire face drops, the excited palpitations of his heart turn sour and what feels like a knife is stabbed through his chest. 

Fuck fuck fuck. 

He stares down at his phone for what feels like an hour before he hurries out of the bathroom and right into Chan’s room. 

Chan looks over at his member with a startled expression. 

“Jeongin? Everything alright?”

“No, no everything is not alright.” He thrusts his phone into Chan’s hand. “What do I do? What should I say?”

Chan looks down at the phone with wide eyes, he quickly scans over the text. His face seems to go through all the stages of grief that Jeongin’s did, just a bit more watered down. 

“You have to call and apologize, Jeongin. She’s definitely a bit drunk right now, but you need to call her.”

Jeongin gulps and his hands clench and unclench several times before he takes his phone back from Chan. 

“Can I sit in here while I do it?”

“Yeah, of course.”

He sits down on the edge of Chan’s bed, staring down at his phone like a deer in headlights. 

Chan just stares at him, not knowing what to do. 

“What do I even say, Chan?”

“How about you start with ‘I’m sorry I was a dick and ignored you’?”

Jeongin groaned and curled in a bit, his jaw clenching with anxiety. 

His thumbs move around the screen, but they don’t tap the call icon. 

Chan watches. “It’s in the top right.”

“I know!”

“Well you weren’t doing anything.”

“Agh!”

Before he could second guess himself, he tapped the call icon and held the phone up to his ear. 

It rings … and rings… And rings…

It doesn’t even go to voicemail. Jeongin’s heart drops through Chan’s bed. 

He brings his phone away from his ear and checks that it’s your number he dialed. 

It is. 

He hangs up and immediately tries again. 

It rings … and rings… And rings…

Chan’s eyes follow him closely. His face falls when he figures out what’s going on. 

“Jeongin…” he whispers and wheels his chair closer to him on the edge of the bed. 

Jeongin doesn’t listen. He hangs up and tries again with shaking fingers. 

“I’m sure it’s just a bad connection, right?”

It rings … and rings... And rings…

He hangs up again with a cry. 

When he looks down at your conversation he sees another notification. 

[8:15 PM]

[Y/N has stopped sharing their location with you.] 

You blocked him. You really blocked him. 

“She’s drunk, Jeongin. Give it until the morning, yeah?”

Jeongin stares at his phone for a long moment. “Yeah.”

-------------------------------------

The next morning was filled with embarrassment and shame on your side. 

When you rolled over with a groggy mind and upset stomach, the first thing you did was check your phone. 

You were still in your dress from last night, your makeup was now smeared all over your face and onto your pillowcase.

A few texts from friends, a couple from Ryan, Instagram notifications, Snapchat, nothing from Jeongin. 

Your face pulled into an ugly sneer for a moment before it quickly morphed into horror when you tapped on your conversation. 

“Oh my god.”

You sat up quickly in bed, and almost immediately regretted it with how your stomach lurched and head spun. 

Rereading all the texts, you wanted to slam your hungover ridden head over and over again into the wall. 

You stopped sharing your location with him? Why would you…?

Oh, shit. You blocked him, didn't you?

Your hand runs through your matted hair nervously and you stare down at your phone. 

“You dramatic bitch!” You curse yourself and gnaw at your lip. 

What do you do? What do you do?

Obviously, you tap around to his contact and unblock his number. 

The texts immediately flood in. 

[March 19 4:25 AM]

Jeongin: Y/N, im so sorry

Jeongin: please answer 

Jeongin: Y/N please unblock me

[4:31 AM]

Jeongin: I don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry. I didn’t know how to go about apologizing 

Jeongin: you’re halfway across the world right now, Y/N, please. 

Jeongin: why can’t you just be a two hour train ride to Busan anymore. 

[4:38 AM]

Jeongin: I miss my best friend, please

Jeongin: I’m so endlessly proud of you. I brag about you every single day.

Jeongin: that picture you took of the Seoul skyline is still my background. The one with our hands. 

Jeongin: I like that it makes me think of you each time i open my phone

[4:44 AM]

Jeongin: i knew you couldn’t wait forever, that’s why it hurts so bad, Y/N

Jeongin: why did I choose this path? It hurts so bad, Y/N

Jeongin: i care about you so deeply

Jeongin: you’re the only one for me

Jeongin: when you left for LA, you took every part of me with you. 

[4:57 AM]

Jeongin: im so proud of you, Y/N. I guess I’ll just see you starting next week for the tour. 

Jeongin: i’ll wait for you

Jeongin: cross my heart

“Fuck,” you whisper, your voice cracking. Tears welling up in your eyes. 

Is he serious? 

What are you supposed to do right now?

A text from Ryan comes in as you’re staring at your phone. 

[12:41 PM]

Ryan: did you still want to come over tonight?

-------------------------------------

A week passed. 

Another entire week without talking to Jeongin. 

It was like color was slowly draining from your world. 

You know you should reach out to him, but shame and embarrassment kept blocking your path to your best friend again. 

But now, you had no choice. 

You stood in front of a large office building, your bag slung over your shoulder, heart in your throat. 

Once you stepped inside this building, it would be the first time in over two years that you and Jeongin were inside the same walls. 

If you had pictured this moment just a month ago, you would’ve been kicking open these doors and sprinting through the halls until you finally laid eyes on him again. 

But now, you find that it feels like your feet have melted into the concrete sidewalk. 

Looking down at your watch, you see that you still have another thirty minutes before you have to be in the meeting. And your mouth is painfully dry. 

A bell dings to your right and you see a coffee shop. 

Perfect. 

You quickly turn and walk into the shop, the same bell dinging to announce your arrival. 

The barista welcomes you in, takes your order, and tells you your total. 

As you’re fumbling for your wallet, an arm reaches out from behind you and swipes their card to pay for your coffee. 

“Oh, thank you! You didn’t have to—“ you turn and your breath catches. 

None other than Bang Chan stood behind you with that charmingly bright smile. 

“Hi Y/N,” he beams. 

“Chan!” you squeal and wrap your arms around him. You completely forgot everything for a moment, especially when he envelopes you in his strong arms. “What a nice surprise!”

“Hi, Y/N,” he says into your hair.

A throat clears behind you so you jump apart to apologize to the barista. She just laughs and takes Chan’s order. 

The two of you stand off to the side to wait for your drinks. 

“How was the flight in?” you ask, bouncing on the balls of your feet. 

“I’ll be honest, I slept through the whole thing, so I’m not sure.”

“It’s probably the only sleep you’ve gotten this week, hm?” 

Chan laughs and rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t deny it. 

The barista calls out a name.

Chan shifts from foot to foot. “I know what happened.”

You tense up and look down at your feet. 

“How much does he hate me?” 

If you’re being honest, you really don’t want to hear the answer. 

Chan scoffs, “Hate you? He doesn’t hate you. He’s just hurt, Y/N. The same way you are. You both hurt one another.”

Looking off to the side, you cross your arms. “Yeah, well. He started it.”

“Don’t be childish.” He nudges you playfully with his elbow. “Distance is hard for close relationships. It was a miracle that you two went this long without a fight.”

You nod your head and bite your lip. 

“I miss him so much.” 

“He’s just across the street, you know.” 

You laugh which causes Chan to laugh.

The barista calls out your name and then says Chan’s right after. 

“Come on, Y/N,” he loops his arm through yours and you both walk out of the coffee shop and into the office building. 

You sip your coffee nervously, the taste is barely hitting your tastebuds with how preoccupied your mind is. 

The elevator ride up to the appropriate floor is simultaneously the longest and shortest ride of your life. 

What’s the worst that can happen, Y/N? He punches you in the face? Pushes you down the stairs? Maybe grab your coffee out of your hand and dump it over your head?

As if he ever would. 

The doors open and you both step out of the elevator. 

Loud voices carry down the hall and you giggle. 

“It’s been so long since I’ve heard you guys in person and not over a phone.”

“It’s louder in person.” Chan sighs and leads you down the hall. 

Each step is a death march of sorts. 

The conference room door swings open before Chan could grab the handle. 

Your heart rate spiked and then flatlined. 

Jeongin stood there with wide eyes and parted lips. He stared at you with every single emotion known to man. 

“Hi Jeongin,” you whisper, holding your coffee tighter. 

He says nothing. 

Jeongin steps out of the doorway and wraps you up tightly in his arms. One hand on the back of your head, the other on your waist. 

A surprised noise leaves your lips and your eyes widen. 

The coffee cup is taken from your hand by Chan who slinks into the conference room, the door closing softly behind him. 

Without a second thought, you return the hug. 

When your arms wrap around him too, a sigh of relief leaves Jeongin’s mouth and his shoulders slump inwards even more. 

He didn’t expect you to hold him. He didn’t expect you to even want to see him. 

Your arms tighten around his body and it feels like ice thawing from his heart. 

Jeongin’s throat tightens and he buries his face into your hair, inhaling deeply. 

He hasn’t held you in so long. He’s missed your touch so badly. 

Jeongin, who hates skinship, couldn’t wait to have you touch him. 

Your hand begins to rub circles on his back and he melts into you like a puddle. 

“I’m so sorry, Jeongin,” you whisper. 

The dams of his heart begin to crack and break. Every pent up emotion he’s felt for the previous three weeks bubbles to the surface. He stifles a sob and holds you tighter. 

“No, please, I’m sorry, Y/N.” His chest sputters with a cry. 

You pull back from him and look up at him with red, glassy eyes. “We’re both idiots, aren’t we?” you push out a laugh in between tiny cries.

You’re trying with all your might not to let the tears fall down your cheeks.

Jeongin isn’t doing much better. His eyes are red and you can see the tears brimming in them.

Three weeks, you haven’t talked. It was the longest span of time the two of you went without speaking ever. 

You reach up and cup both of his cheeks. Jeongin’s eyes close and he leans into your touch.

“I missed you so much, Jeongin.”

He winces at your words and his lips pull into an even deeper frown,

Jeongin brings his hand up to cup yours against his face. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.” he repeats.

You step closer to him and press your lips to his cheek. Jeongin gasps under his breath and stiffens underneath you. The skin underneath your lips heats up.

“I forgive you, Jeongin.” You smile and back away from him. He watches you closely with wide eyes. “It’ll take more than that to get rid of me, you know?”

He smiles sheepishly and nods. “I forgive you too, you know.”

The elevator pings behind you and your new boss walks out with another important looking man. 

He smiles kindly at you. “Let us get this meeting started, no?”

-------------------------------------

The first concert went off without a hitch. 

Because of your position, you’re traveling with the entire crew and the members. Sleeping in the same hotels, going to the same restaurants, using the same transportation.

Sometimes you feel like a ninth member.

The boys all stood on stage with their hands interlocked to take their first final bow of the tour. You smile behind the camera and make sure to get all of them in the shot.

Jeongin spots you from the stage and smiles directly at you in the media pit. Your smile pulls even brighter and you focus the camera on him for some solo shots.

He winks once before turning to wave goodbye to some Stays in the floor seats.

Your heart flutters, it’s the happiest you’ve been in weeks. Hell, maybe even months.

All of the members exit the stage soon after and you walk with your security escort backstage.

You’re able to hear them before you see them. They’re as loud as ever, yapping about how well everything went, how happy they were to see so many Stays, how they can’t wait for the next show.

When you turn the corner to the dressing room with a bright smile on your face, they all turn and look at you.

“Congrats, guys!” you cheer and clap for them.

They all beam and say thank you. 

Jeongin crosses the room to stand by you. He still has his beanie on.

“What did you think?” he asks happily.

“I loved it! I think I took close to two thousand pictures. Maybe more. I’ll have to go through them on my laptop later.”

“That can wait!” Minho calls from the back of the dressing room. “We’re celebrating tonight!”

“Celebrating how, Mr. Lee?” you tease and hear his signature giggle.

“With booze and games back at the hotel.” Jisung answers for him. 

“Oooh,” your mood brightens. “I’m always up for that. You’re right, pictures can wait.”

“Great, then it’s settled.” Jisung claps his hands together once. “One hour, we all meet in my room.”

-------------------------------------

They were not joking around with the amount of booze on his hotel counter. You would swear you were at another frat party.

In your cup, you were nursing your third rum and coke of the night. You made the mistake of asking Changbin to make this one. After the first sip you knew this one was going to have to be taken slow. 

Everyone was sitting in various seats in the room, some on the bed, some on chairs or the floor. The TV was playing a movie that no one was paying attention to.

“Okay, Felix, truth or dare.” Hyunjin asks.

“Truth– no, dare– no, truth.”

“Final answer?”

“Truth.”

“Who was the last person you stalked on social media?” Hyunjin asks, taking a sip of his drink.

“Ah,” Felix thinks for a moment with pink cheeks. “Oh! An old friend from Australia.”

“Just a friend?” Minho jokes.

“Yes, yes, just a friend.” Felix laughs, waving him off. “Y/N, truth or dare?”

You perk up from your seat on the couch. Jeongin sat on your left, his entire side flush with yours.

“Um, truth, I don’t feel like getting up.”

“What’s your body count since you went to America?”

Your eyebrows raise and you cock your head to the side.

Jeongin stiffens up noticeably next to you, he practically jokes on the drink that he was taking a sip of. “Felix, you can’t just–”

“Two.” you answer quickly and take a large swig of your drink.

Jeongin’s head whips around to look at you as if you just shot everyone in the room. You stare back at him with a confused face.

“What?” you ask, getting defensive. Embarrassment crawls up your neck. “I know it’s not a lot, but I’ve been focused on class and everything, you know?”

“No, I just– I didn’t think that–” Jeongin stutters and looks everywhere but at you. “I didn’t know and you–”

“Tell you everything? I didn’t think you wanted to hear about it.”

“Was it Ryan?” he blurts without thinking.

Your face pulls into a shocked, angry expression. “Excuse me?”

“Was one of them Ryan?” he presses further. The alcohol gave him loose lips. 

“Why would–”

Chan interrupts the two of you, “Anyway! Your turn Y/N.”

You stare at Jeongin for another couple of moments before looking away at the group of men. You shake your head in disbelief before taking a deep breath. 

“Seungmin, truth or dare?”

-------------------------------------

“You know you didn’t have to walk me back to my hotel room, it’s only one floor up.”

Jeongin insisted on walking you back up to your room when everyone started turning in for bed. The hotel hallway was eerily quiet compared to the noise filled room that the two of you just left.

“You never know what could happen in a hotel hallway.” He reaches up and rubs the back of his neck nervously.

The two of you take the stairs up to your floor and walk in silence until you reach your room.

“Oh, wait. There was a picture I took tonight that I want you to see! Really quick, come on!” You quickly unlock your door and drag him into your room. 

Jeongin stumbles in and looks around. Your room is spotless, just a few clothes strewn about. 

You walk over to your camera sitting on the desk and pick it up, looking through the pictures for the one you wanted to show him.

He watches you closely, your face is only illuminated by the small screen display. Your tongue is sticking out between your lips in concentration. 

Two? You slept with two people since you’ve been in America? Jealousy began churning deep within his gut and coursing through his veins.

He’s been so busy with being a trainee, then debuting, then training and rehearsing and recording that he hasn’t… he hasn’t been able to be with anyone. Nor has he wanted to. Because none of the people he could have were you.

Jeongin was so hopelessly devoted to you.

Your phone dings on your desk and you look over at it, an angry sneer twitches at your lips and you roll your eyes and then look back at your camera.

“What was that?” Jeongin asked, stepping closer towards you.

You look at Jeongin, then at your phone, then to your camera. “Nothing, you don’t need to worry about it.”

Jeongin lifts a brow curiously. You look back up at him and roll your eyes.

“It’s Ryan.”

Oh, Jeongin saw red for a moment. But, he kept it to himself to the best of his abilities.

“How’s that going, by the way?” Jeongin asks. He really does not want to know the answer. But, morbid curiosity got the better of him.

You hesitate, your finger stops moving on the camera to scroll through the album.

“It didn’t work out.” you tell him without looking up.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

You bite your lip and look up at him. “Are you? Are you really, Jeongin?”

Jeongin is taken aback by your small outburst. “Y/N, I–”

“Because you seem to be super invested in him, Jeongin.” you lower the camera, staring Jeongin in the eye. “Every time I bring him up, your eye twitches. You can’t fool me, I know you too well. I know you hate the guy.”

“I don’t hate him.”

“Then what if I did fuck him?”

Jeongin scoffs and looks away angrily, he crosses his arms over his chest. “I wouldn’t care.”

Oh, he cares so much. His skin is fucking crawling.

“Look at me, Jeongin.”

His jaw clenches and he hesitates.

You put your camera back on the table and cross the final few steps until you reach him. You reach out and grab his chin between your thumb and pointer finger, forcing him to look at you.

Jeongin’s eyes widen and he stares at you.

“Look at me and tell me you don’t care.”

His face twists in anguish. He stares deeply into your eyes, flickering back and forth between them. His mouth screws up in a frown, eyebrows pulling together.

He gulps.

“Say it.” you push. “Say you don’t care if Ryan fucked me.”

“I…” he opens his mouth and promptly shuts it. He swallows again. “I can’t.”

“Why?” you hush.

The grip on his chin tightens even more when he tries to look away from you.

Alcohol thrums through both of your bodies to create a pleasant buzz and lift your confidence levels with one another. 

“Why, Jeongin?”

“Because!” he cries out. His arms uncross and he grabs both of your shoulders tightly. “Because maybe I want to be the one fucking you! Is that what you wanted to hear?”

You’re taken aback for a moment. Truly, you didn’t expect him to be so crass.

“Because maybe I would lie awake in bed at night thinking about being your one and only.” Jeongin steps towards you and you back up until your knees hit the edge of the bed. “Because you drive me fucking crazy and I want you all to myself. Because I can’t stop thinking about fucking you into my mattress every single night!”

Your hand drops from his face but he snatches it up in his own larger one. 

“Do you understand how bad I want you?” he whispers harshly. His nose is scrunched up and he’s talking through gritted teeth. “I’ve wanted you so badly for so many years. I can’t even look at anyone else because you exist. I’ve only ever had eyes for you. No one else exists, no one else makes me feel like you do.”

“How do I make you feel?”

Jeongin stares at you for a moment before he brings your hand down to press at the crotch of his pants.

Through his sweats you can feel just how hard he is. Both of you whimper at the touch.

“I want you so bad, it hurts.” Jeongin begs. “I don’t want anyone else. I want you. I want you to be my first. I can’t be your first, let me be your last.”

Your heart is hammering against your ribs. 

Is this really happening?

“Please, Y/N,” Jeongin whimpers. “I’m begging you.”

He’s begging you to take his virginity right now? Right now?

“Now?” you ask, bewildered.

His dick twitches in your hand and he closes his eyes in what looks like pain, but you both know it’s pleasure.

“Please.”

The tension in the room snaps. 

“Jeongin.” you grab his attention.

His eyes snap open and look at you.

“Kiss me.”

He gasps, cock jumping in your palm again before he smashes his lips against yours with a grunt. 

He’s absolutely devouring your mouth with his. It’s wet and sloppy and completely inexperienced. But what he lacks in experience, he makes up for in enthusiasm.

Moans are slipping from his lips left and right as your tongues intertwine together.

Your hand slides from his dick up his body to tangle in his hair. Your other reaches up and you grab one of his from your shoulder to place it on your waist. He paws at your shirt with his long fingers.

You nip gently at his bottom lip and he moans.

“Am I dreaming?” he whispers against your mouth.

You reach around and pinch his side. He yelps and jumps a bit. 

“No, not dreaming.”

He swoops down and locks your lips once more. Your fingers massage his scalp and comb through his hair. 

You part from his lips for a second to yank your shirt off. Jeongin watches you with hungry eyes, he’s trying so hard to maintain eye contact with you, but he keeps glancing down at your chest.

“Yours too.” You point at his shirt.

It looks like he practically ripped the thing off. It flies off the top of his head and onto the floor. His bare arms come around your exposed waist, his lips searching for yours.

He’s frantic in his movements, like if he isn’t kissing you, he might die.

You grab his hands and bring them up to your bra clasp.

“I don’t–”

“Learn.” you hush against his lips and suck on his bottom lip. He moans and his fingers grasp at the clasp clumsily. 

He’s so focused on trying to unclasp your bra that you take the opportunity to kiss his jawline with an open mouth. Your teeth nip at his sharp jawline and he gasps.

Down his neck you trail your hot, wet kisses. 

With each passing moment, you can feel his desperation growing and growing. A frustrated whine comes from his chest when he can’t get it.

You bite his collarbone harshly and his knees buckle slightly, but he keeps himself up.

“Y/N!” he cries out, pulling so hard at your bra you think it might snap in half.

You giggle and have mercy on him. You reach behind yourself and unhook your bra in one movement.

It drops to the floor and this time, Jeongin has no reservations about staring at your naked chest. His lips part and his own chest starts heaving with pants. 

Another laugh comes from you. 

His eyes flicker up to yours for a split second.

“Are you going to touch me or just stare?” you tease him with a sultry smirk.

Both of his hands come up and cup both of your breasts in greedy handfuls. You moan at the sensation and wrap an arm around his neck, bringing your lips back to his.

Jeongin fondles your breasts, thumbs brushing over your nipples gently. Your back arches into his touch.

“Do it again,” you breathe out. He immediately follows your command, pinching and rubbing at the sensitive buds. Every single one of your noises is swallowed by his wet, swollen lips.

His kisses leave your lips and travel down your neck. They’re too gentle and innocent for your liking. 

“Fuck, bite me, Jeongin.” you beg.

Without any hesitation, his teeth sink into where your neck meets your shoulder. You cry out and roll your hips into his. 

The hands on your tits stutter in their movements before speeding up, the lust consuming his brain. 

He bites again and again just to feel your hips move against his, to hear your moans right next to his ear.

The tent in his gray sweats seems painful at this point. He continues to rut against your body for any sort of relief. 

Threading your fingers through his hair, you pull his mouth off your neck. HIs lips break their suction seal with a pop and he looks into your eyes.

He already looks so fucked out it sends a bolt through you.

“Let me make you feel good,” you whisper against his lips. 

If it’s his first time, you want it to be memorable. 

He doesn’t put up a fight at all. His mind is completely gone, he just nods over and over again. You could tell him ‘jump’ and he’d say ‘how high?’.

Your hands slide down his sculpted chest, mapping out each of the muscles. Jeongin keens under your touch, closing his eyes and sighing in pleasure.

When your hands get to the top of his pants, you quickly slide them down, taking his boxers with them. 

Gray sweats pool around his ankles and his long, hard cock bobs as its set free from its fabric confines. 

Jeongin hisses when the cold hotel air hits him.

You lean up on your tiptoes and capture his lip between your teeth for a moment at the same time you grab his dick gently.

The whine he lets out is sinful.

He’s been dreaming of your touch for so many years, and now that your hand is finally wrapped around him, he can’t believe it. 

You release his lip and it snaps back into place.

Slowly, you slide your hand up and down his cock. So much precum is weeping from the head of his cock. Every movement pulls a noise from Jeongin. 

“Sit on the edge of the bed, Jeongin.”

He gulps and obeys your order, his cock standing proud between his parted legs.

Jeongin watches you closely as you sink down to the ground onto your knees. He fists the sheets on either side of his body with white knuckles.

He has to be dreaming. This has to be one of his wet dreams where he wakes up with ruined pants and sheets. 

Settling between his thighs, you run your hands up his legs. Jeongin watches your movements with a fucked out expression. The way your fingers glide over his skin raises goosebumps. 

One of your hands comes out and grabs his cock with a gentle, yet firm, grip. His eyes snap shut and he can’t stifle the moan that punches from his chest. 

His cock is so slippery from his own precum that your hand glides over the skin easily. 

You pump him up and down for a bit, alternating your grip from firm to gentle, changing the tempo from fast to slow.

His hips won't stay still on the bed, he can’t keep still even if he wanted to. The pleasure from your hand is fucking killing him. It’s all consuming.

You smirk. “Jeongin, look at me.” 

He cracks his hazy eyes open just to see you lean forward and lick a fat stripe up his entire cock.

Jeongin cries out and his head tilts back. His hips jump around and his legs feel like they go numb.

You open mouth kiss down the sides of his shaft.

The pleasure shoots up his spine, he can practically taste the electricity. 

Just when he thinks it can’t get better, you wrap your entire mouth around him and sink down to take as much of his cock as you could without gagging.

His hand flies to your hair and grips tightly. The strands weaving through his lithe fingers.

Up and down, you bob on his shaft, making sure to let the saliva pour from your mouth and down over his balls. 

Jeongin doesn’t even realize how hard he’s pulling your hair until you moan around him. He cries out at the vibrations and pulls even harder. 

Your other hand wraps around whatever you couldn’t fit in your mouth. 

He’s on cloud nine, he can barely breathe. Every intake of breath takes his full concentration, you’re making him feel so fucking good.

No matter how many times he’s touched himself and imagined it was you, it could never compare to the real thing.

His eyes follow your head, watching his cock disappear into your mouth as you stare back at him with those sinfully innocent eyes.

You’re going to be the fucking death of him. 

He’s only able to last for a few moments with your mouth on him before Jeongin is panting out.

“Y/N, you- you gotta, ha– You gotta stop or– or I’ll– fuuuuck– Im c-close and I– hng! But I wanna–! I wanna–! I wanna fu-huck you!”

You swirl your tongue around his head and pop off his cock, sit dribbling down the sides of your mouth.

“You wanna fuck me, Jeongin?” you ask him with a sweet tone. It fucking kills him.

“Yes,” he pants out, “It’s all I want.”

“You’re gonna let me pop your cherry?” you ask, looking up at him through your lashes. After you ask that, you lean over and bite his inner thigh.

Jeongin yelps and tightens the hand in your hair. 

An embarrassed flush covers his neck and ears. “Please, Y/N.” he whimpers. 

Smirking, you stand up from the floor and make quick work of your own sweatpants. Jeongin watches you like a starved man at a buffet. His tongue darts out of his lips and licks them when your panties drop to the ground.

“How do you want me, baby?” you ask him sweetly. 

He tears his eyes away from your naked pussy to look up at you. He gulps.

“How do I…?”

“You want me on top? You want to fuck me from behind? You want to be on top? How do you want me, sweet Jeongin?” Your hand comes out and caresses his cheek. “How do you want our first time?”

His cock jumps at the thought of you in each of those positions.

But one sticks out.

“Need you underneath me,” he whispers, keeping eye contact while his hands come up to rest on your hips.

Your hand cards through his hair. It’s so fluffy.

“Whatever you want, Jeongin.”

Leaning down, you press your lips to his in a sweet kiss. It’s the tamest one you’ve shared tonight.

When you break apart, he chases after your lips, but you crawl onto the bed, laying down and making yourself comfortable on the pillows.

Jeongin follows your movements with innocent, fucked out eyes. He licks his lips again and his eyebrows pull together as he watches you.

You part your legs and run a finger through your sopping wet folds, making a show out of displaying yourself to him. He watches it like a hawk.

Slowly, you bring the finger up and stick it in your mouth, tasting your own juices.

“Come on, Jeongin. You said you were going to be my last.”

He turns and scrambles onto the bed, crawling over you and smashing your lips together desperately. Both of your legs wrap around his waist while he devours your mouth with his own.

His tongue is everywhere in your mouth, licking your own, invading and licking the roof of your mouth, coming out to lick your lips.

When you whimper, you feel his cock jump against your heat. Your hips roll onto his and his hips buck downwards into yours.

Both of you are moaning, panting messes when he pulls away.

“I don’t have a condom.” he says painfully.

“I’m on the pill.”

“Are you sure?”

“Jeongin, please fuck me already. I’ve waited my entire life for this.” you smile up at him with shiny eyes.

His eyes search yours with an equally sentimental look in them.

He nods once and lines himself up with your entrance. His head rubs along your folds a few times, making himself slick.

Your head tilts backwards into the pillows.

“No, please, look at me.” he begs breathlessly.

Immediately, your eyes snap open and you gaze into his.

Two heartbeats pass and he presses into you, his cock invading your soaking walls. The stretch feels so fucking good, you’re so horny for him.

Jeongin is the one that has the harder time keeping his eyes open, his pupils are blown out. His jaw drops in a strained moan, face screwing up almost painfully with how much pleasure is coursing through his veins.

His hips stutter a few times until he bottoms out.

“Holy fuck,” he whines. His hands clenched into fists next to your head. 

“You feel so fucking good, Jeongin,” you praise him, your own voice is fucked out. 

“I’m not going to last,” he cries and buries his face into the crook of your neck.

“Don’t worry about me,’ you coo.

His hips buck again and he whimpers into your skin. 

“Jeongin,” you call to him and he lifts his head. His hair is so ruffled and messy, lips are swollen and wet, cheeks covered in a permanent blush. “Fuck me until you cum.”

His eyes roll back in his head and his hips pull out and slam right back into yours. Both of you cry out, your back arches.

Jeongin continues to fuck into you at a sloppy, harsh pace. His eyebrows furrow in concentration. He looks down at your tits bouncing with each thrust, his head dips down and he takes one of your nipples into his mouth.

“Jeongin!” you cry out and arch into him. He moans around your nipple, biting it gently and rolling it with your teeth.

His thrusts are getting frantic.

He pulls off your tit with a pop and comes up to your face.

“Need you to cum with me,” he murmurs before capturing your lips. “Need it, need it, fuck! I need it, Y/N!”

“Give me your hand.”

He balances his weight on one of his hands and holds out his other one. You guide him down to your folds and press his long, beautiful fingers against your clit.

“Mmmm…” you moan when you guide him to rub in circular motions.

He feels you clench around him and he whimpers into your open mouth. 

“Just like that, Jeongin.” you rasp. “Keep that up and I’ll cum on your cock.”

“Jesus.” 

He rubs faster in some moments, slower in the others. His mind is swimming in the clouds. Everything feels so fucking good. 

Your whines get louder and louder, each one more higher pitched than the last.

“Close, close, close…” you breathe out against his lips. “Hah!”

Thank god. He’s been this close to blowing his load for the last four minutes, but he needed to feel you. He needed it.

“Yes, Jeongin! Yes!”

His thrusts get harder, his rubbing on your clit matches the timing. 

You reach around his back and scratch your nails up his back.

“Come on, Y/N.” he whines. “Cum for me, Y/N. Need to feel you cum around me.”

Your pussy clenches down on him impossibly tight, your head is thrown backwards and your mouth stretches open in a silent scream.

It throws him over the edge, he spills into you with one of the most feral noises he’s ever made in his life. It tears from deep within his chest.

He cums forever, painting your insides white. 

Jeongin buries his face in the crook of your neck as you both come back down to Earth. Your heavy breathing fans out over his back.

One of your hands starts rubbing up and down his naked skin. It’s warm and inviting and he wants to curl into it forever.

He eventually pulls his face away from your neck and looks down at you with stars in his eyes.

“Good?” you ask.

Jeongin laughs and leans down, pressing a kiss to your nose. “It was perfect.”

“Promise?”

He doesn’t even care if he cums once, he just wants to make your body hum with pleasure. He wants to make you see stars and have your toes curling while you pant his name over and over. 

But there’s a slight problem. He’s not even sure you know he exists. 

You, perfect you, are in a majority of his classes. You’re Miss Popular, always talking to whoever sits in the seat next to you. Your hair, makeup, and nails are always done so cleanly and perfectly. 

Everyone was your friend. It didn’t matter where you were, you were talking to someone with that beautiful, bright smile. 

Never him. It was never him, though. It’s not like you’re avoiding him, but he’s not the only person vying for your attention. 

Seungmin has also never been brave enough to approach you. 

So, he sticks to his lonely seat in the back of the class, pining for you from a distance. 

For the entire class he’ll steal glances your way and watch as you chew on the back of your cute little pen, or watch as your fingers fidget with the bottom of your skirt. 

Sometimes he’ll sit by the door so that when you leave before him, he can smell your perfume as you walk by. 

That’s exactly what he’s doing today. The professor just finished the lecture and everyone is packing up their belongings.

Seungmin is making sure to take his sweet time. He’s jotting down last minute notes in his planner, scanning over little details that he may have questions on later. 

Then the smell hits him. That beautiful warm vanilla and coffee scent. It wraps around Seungmin’s nose and invades all of his senses. 

His heart flutters and a chill rips through his body, goosebumps raising on his arms. 

Typically, you walk by so fast he’s only able to inhale the beautiful aroma for a split second. 

But today, it lingers even longer and never wavers. 

“Kim Seungmin, right?”

Oh my god?  

Is this what it’s like to hear angels sing? 

His heartbeat skyrockets and he looks up at you with a shocked expression. 

“Y-Yeah?” Seungmin internally cringes at the way he stutters in front of you. 

But you’re looking down at him with literal stars in your eyes. How are you this perfect?

“I’m Y/N,” You hold out to shake his hand. 

“I know.” Another inward cringe. Yeah, keep putting your foot in your mouth, Seungmin, great job. 

His hand grabs yours and an electric shock goes up his arm. Your skin is so soft, does your lotion smell just like your perfume? Does it smell better?

All you do is giggle in response. 

“I didn’t realize I was famous.” You beam and Seungmin swears his glasses are going to melt off his face from how much his cheeks heat up. 

“Anyway, I’m super sorry to bother you,” You could never bother him, “but the professor talked about that project today and said we needed partners. I really enjoyed your presentation last semester on the causation between beautifying city streets to decrease traffic flow on main roads and increasing them on side streets!”

Surely, he’s died. He’s died and gone to Heaven. Is he alive? If he was hooked up to a heart monitor, he’s sure that it would be flatlining right now. 

“I was wondering if you wanted to work together on this one? You can say no, I’ll totally understand. But, I am a Statistics major after all, I can make it super easy on the analysis side.”

You really think you need to sweeten the pot? All you need to do is ask and he would do the entire project and just stick your name at the top. 

“Sure,” he says weakly.

“Oh, awesome!”

You plop down in the seat next to him, the smell of your perfume is so intoxicating. Seungmin finds himself leaning closer and closer to you before he realizes what he’s doing and his back straightens out. 

He shuffles in his seat to play it off, but you don’t seem to notice in the slightest. 

“I have to run because my next class is across campus, but,” you reach over and grab his pen from his desk. “Here’s my number.” You scribble it down in the margins of his notebook with a little smiley face next to it. 

His head feels so fuzzy. Seungmin is positive he’s about to wake up from a dream. 

The cherry on top is when you grab his hand between both of yours. You’re so pleasantly warm and soft, what if those hands were wrapped around his c—

“Thank you so much!” You chirp happily at him, “Text me ASAP and we can figure out what we want to do! We can meet up and get coffee or something to eat! Thank you, Seungmin!”

And just like that, you stand up and leave in a harmonious whirlwind of vanilla and coffee, leaving Seungmin dumbfounded. 

Did that… really just happen?

-----------------------------------

Just like you requested, Seungmin texted you almost immediately. 

Seungmin: Hey, this is Kim Seungmin 

Y/N: Hey! :) Thank you again for agreeing to work with me! Such a sigh of relief lol

Seungmin: No problem at all. I also liked your presentation on the effect different forms of advertising has on sale numbers for the theatre group on campus. 

Y/N: Aw, thank you! I can’t believe you remember it. I worked for weeks with that group to collect data, but it was totally worth it. 

Seungmin stares down at his phone in the middle of the dining hall. 

He’s… he’s really texting you. So many months of pining, of watching you from a distance, and he’s texting you so casually. 

This morning when he woke up, he had no idea that this is what his day was going to turn out like. Maybe he should send his professor a fruit basket.

Another text comes in while he was staring at the last one. 

Y/N: I’m pretty free this weekend if you want to meet up for coffee to discuss the project! I know it’s a semester long thing and the due date isn’t until finals week, but I think we should get a head start, especially if we want to do a longer study. 

Seungmin: I agree. How does Saturday around 2 sound? There’s a small coffee shop tucked away that I know of. 

Y/N: oooh, sounds fun :) See you then! Can’t wait, Seungmin!

Seungmin drops his phone onto the table in disbelief. 

Even in his wildest dreams, never did he ever conjure up the idea of you approaching him and asking him to work with you. 

He blinks his eyes in disbelief down at the conversation several times. His stomach was doing flip after flip in excitement. 

Saturday could not come soon enough.

-----------------------------------

“Seungmin!” you call out to catch his attention. 

He raises his hand in a greeting and picks up his pace to walk towards you. 

You both agreed to meet outside by the library and walk to the coffee shop together. He told you it was pretty tucked away, so you asked him to show you, who was he to say no?

He’d carry you on his back if you asked him to. If you were on his back, he’d grab your legs underneath your knees, be able to feel your soft skin underneath his palms. Feel your clothed cunt against his–

“Hey!” You smile widely at him as soon as he’s next to you. His heart flutters. “I’m super excited to see this coffee shop, I can’t believe I’ve never heard of it.”

“My two friends work there, that’s the only reason I’ve heard of it, really.” He mutters as the two of you walk side by side. 

“Even better, they’ll know the best things on the menu.”

How are you doing this? You’re so glass-half-full, so sweet it makes his teeth rot. 

The two of you chat on your entire walk to the cafe. Occasionally your arms will brush against one another and each time it goes straight to Seungmin’s heart— and, well, other places. 

He’s always noticed from a different how touchy you were as a person. It didn’t matter if you just met the person or if they were your closest friend in the world, you would reach out and grab their arm for their attention, touch their hands when you laughed, anything. 

Each time you would touch someone else, the ugly curl of jealousy would furl up in his gut. 

But here you were, casually touching him as the two of you walked to what most would see as a date. 

It’s not a date. But, Seungmin is deciding to play pretend and tell himself it is one. 

The coffee shop is so warm when you both enter. It’s not too busy at all, that’s why Seungmin likes coming here so much. 

There’s only about three other customers sitting at tables. 

Immediately, Seungmin sees Jeongin behind the counter. Jeongin, who has heard Seungmin pine about you for years at this point. 

The other boy practically drops the cup of coffee he’s holding when he sees the two of you together. 

His eyes and mouth widened so much you’d think he saw a ghost. 

“No way,” Seungmin sees Jeongin mouth to himself. 

You don’t notice as Seungmin mouths back, “Shut up.” You’re too busy staring at the menu. 

Jeongin immediately sends out the coffee he was working on and practically runs to the counter to take your order. 

“Hi,” he says warmly to you. “What can I get started for you two?”

“Hey!” Your smile mirrors his. “What is your favorite drink right now? Hot, not cold.”

Jeongin’s eyes brighten a bit and he smiles even more. It switches from his customer service smile to his genuine one. 

“Oh, well I’m a huge fan of the maple bourbon spice latte.”

“That sounds amazing, I’ll get that. Can I get it with oatmilk if it’s not too much trouble?”

Jeongin shakes his head in a bit of disbelief, “It’s no trouble at all, you got it. Your usual Seungmin?”

“Yeah.”

“Perfect. Total is $8.17.”

You turn your wrist around to activate your fancy Apple Pay on your watch but Seungmin is faster. He taps his card before you’re even able to blink. 

You look up at him with a mock angry look and grab his arm. “Hey, I wanted to pay since I forced you to be my partner.”

Jeongin smirks and raises an eyebrow, Seungmin sees it, you do not. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Seungmin tries to act nonchalant about it. “Go find a table, the ones in the back are nice.” He smiles gently down at you. 

“Fine, but the next round is on me.”  You squeeze his arm once and walk away to find a table. Seungmin watches you walk away with a lovesick look on his face. 

As soon as you’re out of earshot, Jeongin is bouncing on the balls of his feet. 

“Oh my god! Why didn’t you say you finally grew a pair and asked her out?”

“Because this isn’t a date, she asked to be my partner for a semester-long project in our regression course.”

“That’s even better. Play the long game.”

“Go make my coffee.”

“Min,” Jeongin whines.

“I’m taking your tip out of the jar.”

“Fine.”

Seungmin walks over to the booth you found tucked in the corner between bookcases, both of your coffees in his hands. 

You already set up your laptop and various textbooks and notebooks around you.  

And to top it all off, the most adorable pair of pink, clear plastic blue light glasses are now perched on your nose. 

If he could, he would take a picture of how adorable you look. 

When he places the drinks down on the table, you look up with a grin, “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Seungmin sits down across from you and starts to unpack his own things. 

“So, I‘ve been thinking about ideas,” you start, grabbing his attention. 

“Whatcha got?” He asks, taking a sip from his coffee as his laptop boots up. 

“The library started a new program this semester to keep it open 24 hours instead of closing at midnight. I think we should study the amount of students that come in during those hours around various points of the semester.”

“That’s… a great idea, actually.”

You giggle at the small bit of praise, “Thanks! I was thinking we could find a list of events that the library and student centers are hosting and make a schedule based on that. But, of course, this does mean we’ll have to spend more than a couple days monitoring the library at ungodly hours of the morning.”

Seungmin can’t believe his ears. It’s like good news after good news. This entire week he’s been practically walking on air, and it just keeps getting better. 

“I think I can handle that,” he responds with a smile of his own. 

“Perfect!” You squeal and reach across the table and grab both of his hands. “You’re the perfect partner, Min!”

The nickname is not new. All of his friends call him this. But hearing it tumble from your lipgloss covered mouth goes straight to his head. And not the one on his shoulders. 

“T-Thanks,” he stutters out. He’s basking in the warmth of your hands. “I think this is the first time I haven’t had to come up with the idea myself.”

“I’m chock full of them.” You squeeze his hands once more and bring them back to your laptop. “Now, let’s compile the list of events. Also, maybe we should see if there’s other studies done at different schools like this.”

-----------------------------------

Research continues for weeks. Each time you and Seungmin see each other, his attraction for you only grows. And he didn’t know that was possible.

Another plus is that now you go out of your way to sit next to him in every single class you share. 

It’s distracting but in the best way. 

Now when he goes back to his apartment after class, he can still smell your perfume on his clothes. So many times he’s brought his shirt over his nose to fuck his fist just to smell you and picture it was your hand. 

He’d moan your name out loudly and have some of his most powerful orgasms of his life just having your scent surrounding him. 

Yes, he’d feel a bit of shame the next time he saw you knowing that not even an hour before he was picturing you underneath him with your cherry flavored lips around his cock. 

But he just can’t help it. 

Tonight was another night when you two were going to pull an all-nighter in the library. 

Seungmin is carrying two fresh coffees in his hand, several snacks packed in his bag for your stay in between the bookcases. 

Your face lights up as soon as you see him. 

It always does. 

No matter what. 

Even if he had just seen you a couple hours before, you always perk up. It tugs on his heartstrings in a way that nothing else ever has. 

“T-minus five minutes until the count begins,” you joke with him as you take a coffee from his hand. 

He has since blocked you on Venmo ever since your first “date” at the coffee shop. 

“Anyone even here?”

“I think there’s one person down in the basement. But I haven’t seen anyone else. It’s bid night for most frats plus it’s the Friday before holiday. I’m imagining no one else is going to come in.”

Seungmin nods and sets up his laptop at the table in front of you two. 

He pulls up Netflix, clicking around to the show that you two started the first night in the library. One earbud is handed to you and he takes the other one. 

This routine that you’ve both settled into makes his soul warm and curl up in a happy comfort. It feels so horribly domestic. 

Seungmin dreads the day you finish this project. What is he supposed to do after that? Go back to pining after you from a distance? Watch as someone else takes the seat next to you in class? 

He shakes the thoughts from his head and presses play on the show. It’s just a silly cartoon that keeps you both awake. 

About an hour later, a student comes up from the basement and leaves through the front door. 

“And then there were two,” you giggle and look over at him. 

“The things we sacrifice for research.”

You laugh at his joke and turn back to the show. Reaching in the snack bag, you pull a piece of popcorn out and eat it. 

Two hours later, Seungmin feels your head lean on his shoulder and his heart stops for a moment. 

You’re not asleep, your eyes are still focused on the show with rapt attention. No, you just decided to rest your head on him. 

Seungmin gulps quietly and tries his best to focus. 

He was doing well until you and your tactile nature decided to wrap your arms around his. So now, not only was your head leaning on his shoulder, your two arms looped around his one.

Did you do this on purpose? Was it absentminded?

Your hand comes down and your fingers begin to gently play with his. 

Seungmin thinks his heart might explode. Can you hear how loud it’s slamming against his chest?

What’s even going on in the show anymore? 

His mind completely blanks out when you begin to trail your nails over his skin. 

He turns his head slightly and inhales the smell of your shampoo. It’s just like he walked into a beach vacation home. 

Seungmin shifts on his chair as he feels his pants begin to tighten. It was only a matter of time, really. 

You notice his movement and you bring your head away from him; Seungmin almost cries out from the loss of contact. 

“I’m so sorry,” you stutter a bit. “Am I making you uncomfortable? Oh, geez. Sorry I should’ve asked first, I’m just such a touchy person I forget to ask—“

Seungmin cuts you off by grabbing your hand firmly, “It’s fine.” His voice comes out a lot more confidently than he thought was possible. “I, ah— I don’t mind at all. Actually, I was really enjoying it.”

Your worried expression quickly morphs into a relieved one. “Really? Oh, awesome!”

You hug his arm against your chest and rest your head against his shoulder once more.

It’s sick how much he focused on the way his arm squeezes against your breasts. The feeing shoots straight to his dick and his pants feel even tighter. 

His face is so hot he thinks he might explode. 

“Ugh, can I get so sentimental, Min?”

That nickname again. Jesus, please, not now, Y/N. Sweatpants can only conceal so much. .

You don’t wait for his response. “I’m so happy we got to work together.” You reach down and lace your fingers in between his. He squeezes your hand after you hold his. “You’ve always been in most of my classes and I always enjoyed seeing your projects and everything.”

You pause, then hum wistfully, looking at the laptop and not up at him.

“I have such an easy time approaching people to talk to them.” Another pause, you laugh under your breath. “Except you, Min.”

His heart drops; was he unapproachable? What did he do?

You must’ve noticed his reaction from how he tensed up, so you pull back and look at him closely, your arms and hands still intertwined. 

“Not because of anything you did!” You quickly say and he relaxes a bit. Averting your eyes, you look down at the table, “If I’m being honest I just was so nervous that you would push me away. I’ve just… always um… admired you from a distance. Interpret that how you want.” You laugh, your cheeks turning redder and redder by the second. 

Is he… reading into this correctly? Are you admitting what he thinks you’re admitting? 

“Y/N…”

“Sorry, God. I told myself I was going to wait until after the project to say something.” You pull back away from him a bit. Seungmin is so flabbergasted by your words that he can’t react. “I like you a lot, Seungmin. And I’m super sorry if that makes you uncomfortable. I can … I can finish the project on my own if it’s too much—“

Seungmin’s brain finally rebooted and he shuts you up by pressing the most urgent kiss possible against your lips. It’s sloppy and he practically misses your mouth with how fast he swooped down. 

He’s surprised your teeth don’t clack together. 

A surprised grunt comes from your throat, but you melt into the kiss not even three seconds later. 

Seungmin is on cloud nine. Your lips are the softest thing he’s ever felt in his life. It’s better than he even imagined. No fantasy could ever compare to the real thing. 

His free hand comes up and grabs the side of your face, bringing you closer to him. 

The kiss slowly turns from a messy press into something more heated. Mingling exhales and swapped spit.

You grab his hand tighter and slide your other one up into his hair. 

Your touch on his body already feels so sinfully good and you’ve only grazed his face. 

His eyebrows pinch together as he focuses on the feeling of your mouth gliding over his. On the way he can already taste your chapstick in his mouth. 

“Seungmin,” you pant in between kisses. 

He doesn’t open his eyes, he never wants to tear his face away from you. He wants to die with his lips pressed to yours and his hands on your body. 

“Seungmin,” you repeat. 

“What?” He rasps against your lips, bringing them back in for another searing set of kisses. 

Your hand tightens around his. 

“Do you … do you feel the same, then?”

He laughs out loud and presses his forehead against you. 

“Your favorite color is mint green. You take your coffee with oat milk but only if they use Oatly brand, otherwise you don’t like it. You always chew your pen when focusing. No matter how hard you try, you can never spell the word ‘restaurant’ right on the first try.”

Your eyes stare deeply into his, they’re unwavering and caring. 

“I’ve wanted you to be mine for so long that it hurts, Y/N.”

Instead of responding, you surge forward and eagerly kiss his already swollen lips. 

You clamber out of your seat and onto his lap, both arms wrapping around his neck and his arms loop around your waist. He physically cannot pull you closer to his body.

Both of your mouths are frantic over one another as if you’ll die if you don’t devour each other right there in that moment. Seungmin kisses you like you’re the oxygen he needs to breathe. 

His hands move up and down your sides, up your neck to thread into your hair and then back down to your hips. He can’t decide where he wants to hold you, where he should put his hands.

He’s been dreaming of what you would feel like forever, and now that it’s happening his brain is kicking into overdrive.

Your tongue comes out and licks the seam of his lips and Seungmin’s hips jolt up and his clothed erection presses right into your groin.

Both of you moan together into each other’s mouths.

His tongue eagerly slithers out to meet yours.

You taste like popcorn and coffee. His new favorite combination. 

One of your hands comes down and slides down his chest, he feels every single touch and his body keens, skin singing. 

Down, down, it travels until it gets to the bottom of his shirt. Your hand snakes up underneath the fabric and onto his bare skin. 

His muscles jump at the contact and he whines into your mouth. Both of his hands grab your hips tightly, thumbs pressing into the bone. 

“Want you,” you moan into his mouth.

“Do whatever you want,” he captures your bottom lip between his teeth, gently pulling on it. “I’m so serious, Y/N, fucking do whatever you want to me, please.”

You gulp, he watches your throat bob. Both of you are panting from the heavy kissing. You quickly look over your shoulder.

There’s absolutely no one in the library, and you’re positive no one is going to come in either. They don’t even have a security guard posted in here.

While you’re scanning the room, Seungmin is only looking at you. His eyes are tracing every single inch of your face, every freckle, every curve, everything. The way your eyelashes curl and the asymmetry of your eyes.

Everything about you is so perfect.

He pulls himself up and travels up your neck with open-mouthed, heated licks and kisses. A low hum of pleasure rumbles in your chest and your hips roll down into his.

A bolt of pleasure shoots through his groin, Seungmin moans into your skin.

Warm vanilla and coffee; your skin smells so fucking sweet he could almost cream in his pants. Your smell wraps around him and invades every single sense. 

His tongue licks a fat stripe up your throat and your head tilts back to give him more access.

“Please, Y/N,” he murmurs when his mouth gets underneath your chin, he nips at the skin. “Use me, please. I need you to feel good.”

Every word goes straight to your head. Kim Seungmin is begging you to use him for your own pleasure?

“Are you sure?” you ask, panting. 

His hands tighten on your hips in a bruising grip, “Please.” He basically cries into your skin. He’s squirming around underneath you, writhing like he’s already in the throes of pleasure. “Please please please.” 

With a gulp, you take one more look around the library. Seungmin continues to kiss at any inch of skin that he can reach, his hips basically humping against your core.

You pull his mouth away from your neck by his hair; he whines, he actually whines at that. His eyebrows screw together and his eyes glaze over.

Quickly, you bring your mouth down to him and kiss him again, your tongue finding his immediately to twist together and slip over one another.

Seungmin’s mind is so fogged over he’s not sure if he’s awake. With every kiss, he’s shoved further and further into a lustful haze.

Your kisses are intoxicating, like he was crawling through the desert and you’re his oasis. 

From underneath his shirt, your hand travels even further south until it gets to his bulge. When you cup him through his sweats, Seungmin has to pull away from the kiss to throw his head back with a pitiful whimper. 

His mouth drops open and his eyes screw shut.

You squeeze him even tighter and he bucks into your hand.

“Fuck, you feel so big.”

That goes right to his head and his ego. Every inch of him is buzzing, right down to his fingertips.

“Can I tell you one of my favorite things to think about in class?” you whisper to him and Seungmin nods.

“Please.” Desperate.

“I like to imagine sitting in the back with you, no one else is in the same row as us. I’m wearing one of my shortest skirts.”

Seungmin gulps, your hand is rubbing him so well. He opens his eyes to meet your eyes. He’s so far gone. He’s somewhere else entirely. 

“You reach over while the professor is talking and run your fingers up my thighs, feeling every single inch of exposed skin.”

Would you look at that, you’re wearing a skirt now. 

The hand that’s not on his bulge comes out of his hair and down to your legs. You do what you just described, Seungmin’s eyes watch closely, mesmerized by the action. 

Up, up, up, your fingers go until they reach the hem of your skirt. 

“In the middle of class, you’d reach your long, beautiful fingers underneath my skirt and up to my panties.”

Seungmin follows your hand as it does what you say, the fabric flips up and he groans, pushing his cock into your hand to relieve some of the ache he’s feeling. 

“When you got to my cunt, you’d feel that I already soaked through my panties just thinking about you and the filthy things I let you do to me.”

Your fingers rub against your clothed cunt and your mouth drops open in a sigh.

“You’d then pull them to the side and touch me during class, playing with me, making me squirm. Maybe you’d lean over and tell me I’m being too obvious and to pull it together. But you always make me feel so fucking good, how am I supposed to be quiet about it.”

Just like in your fantasy, you pull your panties to the side and Seungmin moans at the sight of your dripping wet core. You’re already soaked, true to your word. Slowly, your fingers inch over and run through your folds gently.

The sound is something of sin but it makes Seungmin squirm around, his hands staying firmly on your hips.

You reach over and grab one of his hands, bringing it up to your mouth, then you take his middle and ring finger into your mouth and begin sucking on them.

Seungmin almost loses his fucking mind and cums right there on the spot. His back arches off the chair. 

Your tongue swirls around his fingers and makes his head spin. His hips squirm around underneath you when you take your hand off his cock.

His nerves are on fire, firing pleasure through his veins. 

“Fu– uck, Y/N.” he whimpers out when you suck on his fingers.

You smirk with them still in your mouth, teeth grazing over the skin gently.

How are you able to make him feel better than when he jacks off just by sucking on his fingers?

When your tongue slithers between his two fingers, his thigh muscles tighten and he has to physically stop himself from cumming. 

“Hng– Y/N!” He cries out. 

You release his fingers from your mouth with a soft pop, but you don’t let them go, no. You trail them down your body and under your skirt. 

“Will you touch me, Seungmin? Please?” You say as you press his fingers into your soaking wet folds. “Pretty please?”

He moans at your voice and the wet warmth coating his fingertips. 

Immediately, he moves his fingers around, pinching your clit and then rubbing it gently with his thumb. 

Your eyes squint shut and your mouth drops open. 

Fuck, if only he could take a picture of you right now. Angel. Beautiful. Goddess. 

You move your hand from his to run up his arms and over his neck. 

He stares at you like you hung the moon. Each sigh of pleasure and twitch of your eyebrow eggs him on further. 

The faster he rubs at your clit, the more your hips twitch and buck against his own. 

Seungmin is panting with you, your hot exhales fanning over his wet lips. 

“Inside, please.” You request. Seungmin wastes no time sliding his middle finger inside you.

Both of you moan together at the sensation. Your head tilts back and once more he latches his mouth to your throat. 

He cannot get enough of the taste of your skin.  

“Fuck, Seungmin…” you sigh and your head rolls around on your neck.

His speed picks up when you moan his name, he slides another finger inside you and curls them slightly to press on that spongy spot within you. 

Your hips jerk against his wildly. 

“Min… oh, fuck, Min…”

“Yes, yes, that’s right,” he pants into your neck. “Fuck yes,” he groans when you clench around him. “Fuck yes, baby, that’s right.”

The amount of pleasure he’s getting from just touching you has his head spinning. 

With each flick of his thumb and thrust of his fingers, you approach the edge. Toes curling in your shoes. 

“Min… wanna cum on your cock.”

Said cock jumps in his pants, he’s sure there has to be a wet spot showing from how much he’s oozing precum. 

After a few more thrusts, he brings his fingers out of your core. You whine at the feeling. 

Seungmin brings his fingers up to his mouth and licks around at the juices that cover your hand. 

You taste so fucking sweet he could cry. 

One of your hands grabs his wrist and you lean in, licking your own essence off his fingers at the same time. 

He whimpers and every time your tongues meet around his fingers, sprawls fly behind his eyelids. 

With your free hand, you reach down and pull his throbbing cock out from his pants. 

When your skin makes contact with his, Seungmin hisses and his mind whites out. 

Holy shit. Holy shit. 

“Sit on my cock, please.” He begs shamelessly. It comes right out of his mouth before he can even stop it. “Please, please god, please. Need to feel you around me, Y/N.”

You watch him beg for a moment, he’s completely lost in the throes of pleasure and lust. His face is scarlet, eyes hazy and half-lidded. Lips swollen from kissing you relentlessly. 

“You wanna feel me cum all over your cock, Min?” You whisper to him and his eyes roll back at your words. 

“Please!” He begs. “Ride me until I fucking break, Y/N. I can’t fucking take it anymore.”

His hands slide everywhere all over your body again. 

With a smirk, you lift off his lap and position your pussy right over his cock head. He can feel the humid head radiating down over him. 

“Please, please, please, please— hnnnng!” 

The stretch is so delicious and Seungmin’s head falls back as you drop down onto him. Your mouth drops open and your eyes squeeze shut. 

“Fu— uh— uck.” You moan out and plant both hands on his chest. 

“Mmmmoooove…!” he whines out between swollen lips. 

Leaning forward, you bite his bottom lip and at the same time you lift your hips just to bring them down again. 

Seungmin’s face twists up almost like he’s in pain from how much pleasure he feels. His legs feel numb. Every nerve is on fire. 

You’re so hot and wet around him. It’s the only thing he’s able to focus on.

Just as soon as you’re lifting off him, you’re coming back down. 

It’s so intense, every bounce on his lap sends Seungmin’s mind into orbit. Where is he? Are you both still in the library? Is he in a void of pleasure now?

“Wanted you for so long,” he cries out. “Thought about this every single day.”

“Yeah? You thought about fucking me?”

“Yes!” His head falls forward and his forehead rests on your chest. “Yes, yes, I did.”

“Thought about you all the time, Seungmin. Every time I would touch myself I would wish it was your fingers or your tongue.”

Seungmin whines so loud.

“Would stare at those beautiful lips, see your tongue come out. Wanna suck on it like candy.” yu continue.

He feels so powerless at the moment. His body is singing such a sinful song; moans, whimpers, whines, and groans all fall from his lips so easily. Like water spilling from a cup. 

His head is spinning, he can’t think of anything else. 

Warm vanilla and coffee has him in a death grip. But he would so happily die right now, completely consumed by you. 

His eyes begin to glisten from the overwhelming pleasure, everything hitting him like a ton of bricks. You’re bouncing on his cock so well he thinks he might die. 

The grip he has on your hips is so bruising, his fingers curl into your shirt. 

Tears bead up in the corners of his eyes and he can’t do anything but let them fall, his face buried in your chest. The fabric of your shirt absorbs his cries of pleasure. 

You grab his face and bring it away from your chest, looking down into his eyes. Seungmin’s pupils are blown out, tears freely falling down his cheeks. 

“Feel good, puppy?” You moan out. 

His eyes squint closed and his cock jumps inside you.

He can’t even form words to respond to you, all Seungmin is able to do is babble a few jumbled moans and grab you tighter. 

How is he ever going to fucking walk again after this? Any time he ever smells your perfume he’s going to ruin his pants. 

“So close to cumming all over you, Min. How would you like that? You want me to cum on your cock? Then you can fill me up?”

He’s gone, his bones are not in his body. 

More tears spill down his face, you lean down and lick all the way from his jaw to his cheekbone. 

A grunt punches from his chest. 

“Close, close, close.” You pant in his ear before your walls clench down on him so hard, Seungmin sees white. 

His vision is gone. 

He’s cumming so hard he’s not sure he’ll ever come down to Earth. Your cunt is milking him for all he’s worth. 

Is he making noise? He can’t tell. Seungmin could be screaming, he could be quiet, but he for sure has no idea. 

A long few moments pass before his mind reboots and he feels you panting against his chest. Your fingers are carding through his sweaty hair gently. 

He then picks up on your gentle coos in his ear, “So good for me, you did so well, Minnie.”

Seungmin’s arms move and he wraps them tightly around your waist. 

“There you are, baby…” you whisper warmly into his ear. 

Your fingers continue to scratch his head and comfort him closely. Eventually, you begin humming lowly. 

Everything you’ve done tops the last. 

After a bit, you pull back and look down at him. Seungmin stares up at you with an exhausted, fucked out expression. 

“Hi, baby.” You whisper, running your fingers down his cheek, over his lips, then his chin.

“Hi.” He mutters back. 

“Good?” You ask.

“Jesus fuck,” he groans and his head rolls into your hand. “I think I passed out.”

“Hmm,” you hum happily. “That is good, then.”

He turns his head and kisses your palm. 

Both of you sit in silence for a few more moments. 

“Does this mean you’re my girlfriend now?” He suddenly turns shy even though he’s still buried inside you.

He knows you can feel where it’s pressed against your thigh, a matching heat radiating from between your legs, and he feels like he can taste your arousal in the air. The tangy sweet taste of it makes his hip grind into your leg once to alleviate a bit of the pressure, before he slips his hand under your shirt, splaying it over the soft slope of your waist. Your body arches into him as if instinctively, and it thrills him, how responsive you are. It makes you feel so much more real. He struggles with it sometimes, realising you’re really his.

“Seung,” you breathe out, and his heart skips a beat when your voice breaks ever so slightly at the end. He wants to give you anything you ask when you say his name like that.

Your hands wind into his hair and your lips become more insistent, and it sets his whole body on fire with want for you. He pulls away from you and his entire body protests, but he presses another kiss to the corner of your mouth before he pulls you up. You let him manoeuvre you into his lap without so much as a questioning look, and it makes him smile.

He settles you with your back is against his chest and gently brushes your hair from your neck, before burying his nose in your soft skin and inhaling.

“You smell so good,” he whispers into your skin and winds his arms around your waist. A shiver runs down your spine when he brushes his palms down your waist, up and down your thighs, across your belly, just feeling your body under his hands. He lets his hand trail down the inside of your thighs before cupping your clothed core. You sigh out deliciously.

“Can I undress you, baby?” he whispers. You nod your head frantically.

He takes his time with it, pressing soft kisses to the side of your neck as he drags his hands to your waistband languidly, popping the button of your jeans and pulling down the zipper. He pushes your pants down and lets you wiggle out of them. Oh, he can definitely smell you now. He indulgently caresses your thighs, feeling the soft, warm skin before gently tugging your shirt over your head, undoing your bra while you’re leaning forward, before pulling you back into his chest and looking down at you.

There’s a deep blush on your cheeks, and he knows it’s because he’s fully dressed, and you’re naked in his lap except for your panties; but you don’t complain or hide, and it’s this trust makes desire pool deep in his abdomen.

“So, so beautiful,” he hums into your skin, pressing a soft kiss to your jaw.

He lets his hands run over your breasts, cupping them gently and rolling your hardened nipples between his thumb or pointer finger. Your head falls onto his shoulder and your legs snap shut with a shiver, rubbing against each other to find some relief.

But he can’t have that. His hands fall from your breasts and come to your thighs, hooking them over his own, so he can spread you open for him, just how he wants. The whimper you let out goes straight to his dick. He moves one hand to palm your breast, the other caresses down the inside of your thigh until he’s cupping your heat again. Your hips stutter into his, and you breathe out a moan. He can feel the wet patch on his palm, and he licks his lips, his other hand pinching your nipple. You keen out.

“Let’s take these off,” he mutters and taps your leg, motioning for you to untangle yourself from him enough to pull your panties down and off, before he spread you out for him again.

You’re entirely naked for him, goosebumps littering your soft skin, your core exposed. He feels himself leak into his boxers.

His fingers find your cunt, and he lets out a shaky breath when he finds you thoroughly soaked for him. His fingertips slide through the slickness, circling your clit, travelling down, dipping just slightly into your entrance. He watches as your hips twitch, listens to the broken whine leaving your lips.

He nibbles at your neck as he slowly sinks one finger into you, and you moan, hand winding into the hair on the side of his head. You’re dripping wet for him, and he spreads you out further with his legs, sinking a second finger into your heat to the hilt before pulling them both out, rubbing your clit lightly.

“You feel like heaven,” he whispers into your neck as he sinks into you again. Your back arches and he pulls you closer against his chest, his free hand now going to the other breast. His fingers start pumping into you languidly, the sound of your wetness accompanying every single one of his movements.

“Can you hear how wet you are?” he asks breathlessly, and all you can do is nod, mewling feebly.

“Dripping, all for me,” he mutters, picking up his speed, and you keen out in his hold, thighs flexing but not closing. He smiles to himself. “How did I get so lucky?”

You turn your head to his, looking at him with the most desperate expression on your beautiful face before leaning forward and smashing your lips into his.

He moans into your mouth, rutting his fingers even deeper into you, angling them slightly until he can feel the spongy spot on his fingertips. You mewl into his lips, your nails scratching across his scalp.

He can feel you flutter around his fingers, your walls clenching down hard, and he knows you’re getting close. You’re rocking your hips into his fingers slightly, rubbing against his bulge with every movement, making it incredibly hard to focus.

“I know you’re close, angel,” he mumbles against your lips, an edge to his voice that he can’t conceal, “are you going to cum for me?”

You nod, and he stares at you lovingly, moving his hand from your breast to your throat, pressing down just how he knows you like, and he feels more wetness on his fingers, your cunt clenching rhythmically.

He presses his palm down, so it drags against your clit, and he watches your orgasm build, your hands clawing at his arm and his thighs, your eyes rolling into the back of your head, your thighs shaking, and then you’re falling apart, cumming all over his hand with a choked moan.

“There you go, my pretty girl,” he mumbles, pressing hot kisses to your neck as he rides out your orgasm, rutting his fingers deep into you, his composure faltering.

When you’ve gone limp in his grasp, he pulls his fingers out of you carefully, kisses your cheek and scoops you up in his arms. He carries you into the bedroom and places you down on the bed gently, pulling the pillow to sit perfectly under your head. You pull him into your lips immediately, kissing him deeply, and he smiles into your lips. You tug at his shirt until he sits up and throws it onto the floor before coming back to hover over you, your skin on his making him strain against the confines of his jeans. As if you knew, you trail your hand down his chest and rub him. He’s so sensitive at this point, his head falls into the crook of your neck with a groan.

“I need you, Seung,” you purr, “need to feel you inside of me.”

And he doesn’t need to be told twice, standing up from the bed to take off his jeans and boxers, shivering when his cock finally springs free. You’re watching him where you’re lying pretty on the pillows, your bottom lip caught between your teeth, your eyes roaming his body. He wants to eat you alive.

When he climbs over you now, his hands are harder, more demanding, yet still gentle as ever. He spreads you open for himself again, slowly, pushing your legs back against your sides, running a finger through the wetness and dipping it into you while he strokes himself. His eyes are glued to you; you’re still so wet, your clit all swollen, and if he wasn’t so desperate, he would lean down and make you cum all over his tongue. But he doesn’t have the self-control, not tonight, not when he’s so hard he thinks he might cry.

He lines himself up with your entrance slowly, eyes briefly flicking up to where you’re perched on the pillows, wordlessly asking for your permission. You nod at him, the love in your eyes mixing with desire, and he pushes the head of his cock into your heat.

He stills there, his breath audibly hitching in his throat, his head falling back as you flutter around him. But then he pushes in further and further, his cock pulsing with every inch that’s sheathed in your slick, hot heat and when he’s bottomed out, he groans, looking into your eyes and watching your eyelids flutter when he slowly pulls out and pushes himself in again.

“You take me so well, angel,” he murmurs out, repeating the slow motion. The sensation makes his toes curl. You whine and flutter around him.

“Like you were made for me.”

And he does it again, your cunt pulling tighter and wetter around him.

“You were made for me,” he repeats, continuing to fuck you so torturously slowly he can feel every ridge of your walls moulding around his cock. His mind clouding over with the pleasure that’s blooming in his abdomen.

“So perfect, and all for me.”

You whimper out underneath him, and he leans down to capture your lips in his before he starts rutting his hips into yours, hard. It’s not fast, but it’s deep, the way he bucks into you. You’re moaning wantonly underneath him, eyes rolling into the back of your head every time the tip of his cock kisses the perfect spot inside of you.

“All for you,” you whisper into his lips, and he loses it, hiking both your legs over his arms, folding you in half as he starts fucking into you desperately. You’ve taken over his senses and he can barely think straight with how you’re sucking him in, how you’re touching him like you still can’t get enough. You’re so fucking perfect.

“What did I do to deserve you,” Seungmin babbles out, hips snapping into you tirelessly, broken moans falling from his lips. He kisses you desperately, and he can feel himself barrelling towards a life-changing orgasm.

“Pretty baby, I need you to cum for me,” he whispers, eyes locking with yours. He thinks he can see his entire future in your eyes.

“Sweet baby, cum on my cock, fuck,” he’s so fucking close, “claim me, I’m fucking yours, oh fuck.”

Your nails dig into his back and your head cants back as you fall apart with a wail, your release forming a creamy ring around the bottom of his cock, and he tries to ride out your orgasm, but he doesn’t stand a chance, desperately fucking himself into you, letting you milk him as he spills into you with a broken whimper.

“I’m sorry, I’m not always good with words,” he whispers into your hair after he helped you clean up, and your bodies are tangled together under the sheets. You pull back to look at him in surprise, opening your mouth as if to say something, but he shakes his head, taking a deep breath.

“I mean it, I’m sorry I don’t tell you that I love you enough. I’m sorry I don’t hold your hand very often. I do love you, though. More than words can express.”

His eyes, that were glued to your intertwined hands during his monologue, finally lift, and he finds you smiling at him.

“I know, Seung,” you say gently, “I’ve never doubted it. Just because you love me in your own way doesn’t mean you don’t love me.”

He’s speechless for a second, tears pricking at his eyes as he looks at you, the smile on your face so peaceful, your eyes sparkling in the dim light. You looked like you meant it.

“How did you find me? Thank God you found me,” he mumbles hoarsely, before he pulls you closer and kisses you with everything he has.

skzms' masterlist // ko-fi

you’ve known felix since before he could tie his own belt.

before he even had a belt, actually. back when his dobok was two sizes too big and he tripped over the pant legs during warm-ups. back when he had a baby lisp and freckles.

by the time you’d figured out how to break a board clean down the middle, he still hesitated before every stomp, wincing like the wood might fight back.

when you earned your yellow belts, you both bragged to anyone who would listen. even your moms, even though they were the ones sewing your name tags onto the belts the night before.

when you got your blue belt, he high-fived you so hard your palm stung. he was starting to get faster by then. taller, too. his kicks had rhythm, and his eyes stayed locked on his targets like he actually meant business.

by red belt, you were the unofficial captains of your respective brackets. everyone at the academy knew who you were—the dynamic duo, the two best students who never got to fight each other.

because boys and girls didn’t spar together. at least, not officially.

so instead, you cheered for each other from the sidelines. when he won, he looked for you first. when you won, he was already on his feet, hands cupped around his mouth, screaming your name like it was the final bell at the olympics.

and you love him. 

you’re not sure when it happened, only that it did. somewhere between his first growth spurt and the day he started tying his belt without asking for help. somewhere in the million hours you’ve spent beside him, laughing at his jokes, rolling your eyes when he winked at you after a clean landing, pretending your heart wasn’t pounding.

but you’ve never dared to say anything.

because as close as you are, as easy as it is to be next to him, you don’t know if he’s ever looked at you and seen more than just you. his best friend. the girl that was like family to him.

and that was your normal.

after training hours, the gym was mostly empty, lights buzzing overhead. most students had gone home, lockers clanged shut. the floor was quiet, eerily so. you were toweling off, expecting to head out like always.

felix was beside you, lacing up his shoes. his locks were damp from sweat, sticking to his forehead, and his white t-shirt was clinging to his back where his chest protector had been. he looked just as exhausted as you felt, but in that floaty way he always did after training. meanwhile, your limbs felt like noodles, and your ankle still throbbed from that one unlucky pivot during drills.

“let’s get out of here,” you muttered, slinging your duffel over your shoulder. “my legs are literally going to give out in the middle of the crosswalk.”

felix glanced over with a tired smile. “want me to carry you?”

you rolled your eyes, bumping his arm lightly. “not unless you wanna get kicked in the shin.”

“guess you’ve still got some energy, then.”

you let out a breathy laugh. this was the part of the day you always looked forward to, just you and felix, winding down, teasing each other, walking home under streetlights like nothing outside the dojang existed. you’d already turned halfway toward the doors when you heard it:

“y/n. felix.”

your heads turned at the same time.

your coach stood at the edge of the mat, arms crossed, that sharp look on his face. the kind you and felix both knew too well. he always had it on  when something serious was about to drop.

you straightened instinctively. felix rose from the bench, blinking in surprise.

“over here.”

you exchanged a quick look before stepping forward together. your body ached, and your brain was already half in the shower, but something about his tone snapped you back to focus.

felix followed without hesitation, shoes squeaking faintly on the polished floor. he stood just to your right, where he always stood.

the coach began. “the national showcase is restructuring this year. there’s a new format which means one representative per academy. one. that’s it.”

you blinked. 

“it’s mixed gender. they’re making it a headline match. top student from each school, regardless of gender.”

you swallowed, hard. 

“i’ve narrowed it down to you two,” he continued. “it’s obvious. you’re the strongest candidates.”

you didn’t mean to feel surprised—but you did. you’d always known you were good. competitive. consistent. but felix was… felix. stronger. faster. a cleaner record. everyone said it. you’d said it, even. 

your coach glanced at you, his expression suddenly a little sharper, like he could read your thoughts.

“and before you start thinking it should automatically be him,” he added, “don’t.”

you blinked again.

“you’re both black belts,” he said simply. “both leaders in this academy. you’ve trained just as long. and frankly?” his eyes met yours. “it would be damn good for people to see a girl out there. especially at a showcase like this. i’ve seen how the crowd reacts. half of them still think this sport belongs to the boys. i’d like to shut them up.”

a flush crawled up your neck.

you felt your chest lift slightly, adrenaline rushing through your veins again despite the fatigue.

“so i need to see you spar,” he said.

your stomach dropped.

felix’s head turned toward him slowly. “sir…?”

the coach clarified. “doesn’t need to be long. maybe a few rounds. show me who’s sharper right now. whoever proves it gets the spot.”

you nodded, already adjusting your grip on your bag. “yes, sir.”

you were tired, sure, but this was the moment. you weren’t going to say no to this.

coach waved a hand. “get changed.”

you turned, already opening your bag when felix’s voice cut through the air:

“we’ve just had a long day.”

you stopped moving.

coach blinked. “what?”

felix didn’t raise his voice. he never did. but there was slight bite to his words. “we’ve been at it all evening. we’re not going to give our best right now. i think we should wait.”

you straightened slowly, hand frozen at the zipper.

“tomorrow, then?” coach asked, tone stiff.

there was a pause. too long of one.

felix’s throat worked. “i… don’t think that’s a good idea either.”

silence.

you turned your head toward him like you hadn’t heard him right. “you don’t want to spar for the spot? at all?”

the coach’s expression darkened. “this isn’t optional.”

“i know,” felix said quickly. “i’m not refusing training. i just… i’d rather not do this particular match.”

the coach stepped forward slightly, voice calm but commanding now. “is this personal, lee felix?”

felix bowed his head. “no, sir. it’s not.”

“then what is it?”

he hesitated. “i’m sorry.”

that was it.

no explanation. no excuse. no real answer.

the coach stared him down for a moment, visibly irritated now. “we don’t withhold effort when we’re tired. we don’t back out of challenges we’re prepared for. you know that.”

felix kept his head down. you gave felix a look—sharp. say something, your eyes seemed to ask. 

but he didn’t. he stared at the floor like it might open up and swallow him.

coach let out a tight breath through his nose. “lee felix, i’ve never had to ask you twice. you’ve trained through sprains, migraines, stomach bugs—and now you’re telling me you can’t manage five minutes with the student who’s been your equal since day one?”

felix didn’t move.

your coach’s voice cooled. “maybe i should stop wasting time. if she’s ready, and you’re not, then maybe the decision’s already made.”

you straightened, taken aback.

he was serious.

your heart jumped—because the spot was right there, within reach.

but it felt… wrong. like someone handing you a gold medal after you’d tripped halfway through the race.

you took a step forward. “sir, i’d prefer if this was fair,” you said quietly, tightly. “i don’t want the slot just because he won’t step in. i’m willing to do the match right now.”

the coach looked between the two of you. “it’s no good if only one of you is. i’ll find another way to make the call.”

he turned and walked off, footsteps sharp on the mats.

you were left standing beside felix, still gripping your duffel, heart pounding—not from nerves, but from frustration. from how fast he’d shut it down. from the fact that he hadn’t even looked at you.

you turned to him. “what was that?”

he didn’t answer.

“felix.”

still nothing.

so you pushed him.

not hard—but enough to make his shoulder swing back. enough to demand a reaction. 

“what the hell is going on with you?” you asked, voice low and furious. “you could’ve at least tried. you didn’t even try.”

his mouth opened, then closed. he looked away. and that’s when the edge of your anger faltered—just a little. because he looked off. not tired. not pissed. just… like something inside him had short-circuited.

“are you sick?” you asked, eyes narrowing. “did you pull something? what’s going on?”

he shook his head slowly. “no.”

“then what is it?” your voice dropped, a thread of confusion laced through your frustration now. “you never talk back to the coach. so why now?”

“i couldn’t make him do something i didn’t want to do,” felix said, voice low but steady.

you blinked, hard. “i thought you’d take it,” you went on, the words coming faster now, all the confusion folding in on itself. “haven’t we always talked about this? since we were kids? that one day we’d face off for real? no bracket rules, no holding back?”

silence.

“and now we get that chance, and suddenly you’re… what, backing out because you don’t feel like it?”

his head finally lifted.

and this time, when he met your gaze, there was something fractured in his eyes. something like guilt.

“that’s the problem,” he said.

you blinked. “what?”

he exhaled, like the words were fighting their way out.

“that’s the problem, y/n. i can’t go against you.”

your breath caught.

he didn’t say it like a choice. he said it like a confession. like it physically hurt to even consider it.

you blinked. “what—what do you mean you can’t?”

“i mean i can’t step onto that mat and treat you like—like just another opponent.”

you stared at him, stunned. “so… what, you think i’m too soft? too weak? you think you’ll hurt me?”

he went silent. just stood there, jaw tight, eyes unreadable.

that was louder than any answer he could’ve given you.

you stepped back, chest tightening.

you’d always known people would see you that way. you’d heard it from opponents. from judges. from random boys at tournaments who asked if you needed help tightening your gear.

but you never thought felix would be one of them.

never thought he would look at you and see someone he couldn’t even be bothered to fight.

your mouth was dry. you could feel the heat crawling up your neck, the burn behind your eyes rising faster than you could blink it away.

“i can’t believe you,” you said, quietly at first.

felix’s brows drew together. “y/n—”

“no.” you shook your head, backing up another step. 

“i wasn’t trying to make you feel—”

“like what?” you snapped. “ like i’m only strong when i’m not standing across from you?”

he winced.

and for a second, you hated that it still hurt to see that look on his face.

you reached down, fingers trembling slightly as you picked up your duffel, slinging it over your shoulder with more force than necessary.

“well,” you said, voice tight. “i hope you have a great time at the showcase.”

felix blinked, eyes narrowing.

“coach is going to end up picking you anyway. let’s not pretend this is still a decision.” he opened his mouth, but you cut him off before he could say a word. “so thanks for at least giving me a chance,”

you turned on your heel, your shoes squeaking faintly on the mat.

“y/n—” he called, stepping after you. “wait—let me walk you home.”

you froze with your hand on the door. “right. because i can’t even handle the sidewalk alone now, right? because that’d be too dangerous for someone like me?”

“that’s not what i meant,” he said, quickly. “i just—”

“i’m fine, felix,” you bit out. “i’ve always been fine.”

you yanked the door open. it slammed against the wall with a heavy, echoing thud.

and then, without waiting for him to try again,

you walked out.

the door shut behind you with a hollow click.

the night air hit harder than you expected.

cooler than it was earlier. sharper, too.

you tightened your grip on your duffel strap and kept your head down, letting the fluorescent gym lights fade behind you. the quiet was jarring after hours of shouting, movement, sweat hitting the mats. now it was just your footsteps on concrete. just the sound of your breath, still not quite steady.

you walked fast. because you were mad.

mad at felix. mad at yourself. mad at the fact that you’d even thought today could end differently.

your ankle ached with each step, a dull throb from sparring earlier, but you didn’t slow down. you didn’t want to give yourself time to think. not yet.

the sidewalk curved near the intersection—past the convenience store, a shuttered nail salon, and a tiny karaoke bar squished between two office buildings. the place you’d passed a hundred times with felix. usually loud, full of students after school, music bleeding out through the door.

but tonight, it was nearly empty.

just one guy outside, leaning against the side wall with his hoodie pulled up, a cigarette dangling from his fingers.

you wouldn’t have looked twice, except—

he turned slightly when you passed. like he heard your footsteps and recognized them.

and then he said your name.

“y/n?”

you slowed instinctively, brows furrowing as you turned.

he looked familiar. familiar in the way a name itched at the back of your mind.

you squinted in the glow of the pink neon light overhead. “sorry, do i know—”

“minjae,” he said, giving you a small, unreadable smile. “you probably don’t remember me.”

but you did. sort of.

you’d seen him at the academy when you were younger. he was a bit bigger. older. one of those students who always kicked a little too hard. you didn’t know much about him—just that one day, he was gone.

no warning. no goodbye.

and no one talked about it.

you’d asked once, and someone said, “he had issues.” that was it. like the words were enough to shut the whole thing down. now he was standing three feet in front of you, hands in his pockets, watching you with a look that made your spine go stiff.

“didn’t think you’d be walking alone,” he said. “not after hours.”

“i’m not far,” you replied, trying to keep your voice casual. “i live close.”

he nodded like he already knew that.

“i can walk you,” he offered. “if that’s okay.”

you hesitated.

everything in your gut told you to say no. but something about the way he said it—like he expected you to agree, like he was giving you permission to feel safe—froze your voice in your throat.

“…sure,” you said. “if you want.”

you hated the way it sounded when it left your mouth.

he smiled again. the two of you fell into step. the night felt quieter than usual—like the world had ducked out early, leaving you behind.

“so you’re still with the academy?” he asked, his voice easy. too easy.

you nodded. “yeah. still training.”

“and felix?” he asked, his gaze flicking sideways.

you paused for half a breath. “he’s good.”

minjae hummed. “still coach’s favorite?”

you didn’t answer.

“thought so,” he muttered. “guess nothing’s changed.”

you tried to shift the conversation. “what about you? where do you train now?”

he didn’t answer right away.

then: “i don’t.”

you looked at him. “oh?”

“yea, your dojang was the last one i went to. i got kicked out,” he said. like he was proud of it.

your stomach tightened. you slowed slightly, just a step, but he matched your pace without missing a beat.

you forced a laugh. “really?”

“mhm. put some kid in a coma.”

your blood ran cold.

“he didn't tap out,” he said. “at least not fast enough. or maybe i couldn’t stop. it’s kind of a blur.”

you stopped walking.

he didn’t.

he took another slow step toward you, and when he noticed you’d fallen behind, he turned—still smiling.

“you didn’t hear that part, huh?” he said.

your legs felt rooted to the pavement, your breath shallow in your chest.

minjae tilted his head, hands still shoved casually in his hoodie pocket like you were just two old friends on a walk.

“i’ve seen you walk home, you know,” he murmured. “after training. you always think no one’s watching.”

your blood ran cold.

“but you’ve always got felix on your tail,” he added with a crooked grin.

your jaw clenched. “you’ve been watching us?”

he smiled wider. “not always. just… when it felt right.” 

your fingers itched to move, to reach for your bag, your phone, something—but your feet still hadn’t moved. you didn’t want to provoke him. didn’t want to show fear. but your heart was thudding against your ribs so hard it felt like it might crack through.

“i mean, i get it,” he continued, ignoring you completely. “obviously, felix has to make sure no one gets too close, right? can’t have anyone messing up his little golden girl. not when he’s the only one who gets to keep you all polished up.” he mimicked the voice mockingly, then took another step toward you. 

“i think you should back up,” you said, voice low but steady. at least, you hoped it sounded steady.

he let out a quiet laugh, like your warning actually amused him. then he took another step. and another. and before you could even fully shift your stance, his hand shot out and he slammed you back against the wall. your shoulder cracked hard against the brick, and before you could react, his hand came up, flat against your mouth.

it was fast. brutal.

the street behind you was quiet, the sidewalk barely lit. no one around. the alley between the buildings was narrow—tight enough that it felt like a trap. and he knew it. 

panic flared sharp in your chest—but not enough to drown you.

because your body moved on instinct.

you brought your knee up hard, hitting groin, enough to make him grunt and lose balance for a second.

you twisted your wrist, yanking it free just enough to slip your hand up and drive your fist straight into the side of his face—knuckles connecting just beneath his eye.

he stumbled and swore.

you ducked, slipped out of the corner, and dropped your duffel bag in the same motion.

he came at you again.

no control. just pure aggression.

you blocked the first wild punch. dodged the second. landed a kick to his ribs—but he recovered too fast.

he lunged, grabbed the front of your jacket, and shoved you again. your head hit the wall this time,.

“bitch,” he spat, eyes dark, wild. “you think you can fight me? you think that fancy footwork means anything out here?”

you tried to move—tried to dodge—but he was heavier, and faster than you expected in that moment. all that training, all that discipline, and it still didn’t matter when someone was wild enough to throw everything out the window.

his other hand reached up, fumbling along the ledge just above your head.

you didn’t realize what he was grabbing for—until your eyes followed the motion.

there. a broken brick, half-buried in dust, tucked between chipped plaster and rusted railing. left behind from old construction.

his fingers curled around it.

and your blood ran cold.

you thrashed, feet scraping against the wall, heart slamming in your chest—but his arm reared back.

he swung.

and missed your head.

the brick slammed into your shoulder with a sickening sound, and your body jolted with the force of it. pain shot down your arm—sharp, white-hot, paralyzing for a second. you gasped, as you crumpled slightly, the impact stealing your breath.

debris rained down—bits of plaster and grit stinging your face.

“shit,” minjae muttered, stumbling slightly.

you barely had time to blink before his arm went up again.

but he didn’t get the chance.

because something ripped him off you.

he was yanked backward so hard, he stumbled—crashed into the opposite wall. and then fists.

fists everywhere.

not wild like minjae’s. not undisciplined. but brutal.

felix.

minjae tried to stagger upright, off-balance, swaying like alcohol was finally catching up. he barely got his hands up before felix spun—one fluid motion, clean and fast—and landed a roundhouse kick to the side of his face so hard it echoed down the alley.

minjae’s body dropped like dead weight—slammed to the pavement, dazed, bleeding, barely able to move.

but felix didn’t stop.

he grabbed the front of minjae’s hoodie, dragged him halfway up, and punched—a sickening thud of knuckles on bone.

“you’re mental,” felix spat, voice shaking with fury. “you’re absolutely fucking mental—what the hell is wrong with you?”

another hit.

“you psycho piece of shit—”

another.

minjae gasped something. a plea, maybe. slurred and broken. but felix didn’t hear it.

or maybe he did, and he didn’t care.

you pressed yourself against the wall, breath shallow, shoulder throbbing, the cold concrete biting into your back as the shock finally started to settle into your bones.

you’d never seen him like this.

you didn’t know anyone could look like this.

minjae was barely conscious now—his body limp in felix’s grip, blood dripping from his nose, lip split, one eye already swelling shut. 

“felix,” you croaked.

he didn’t move.

“felix,” you said again, louder this time—your voice breaking.

still nothing. his jaw was locked, his body coiled, eyes wild and fixed on minjae like he hadn’t quite realized the fight was over.

you pressed your palm against the cold ground, tried to push yourself up, wincing as your shoulder flared with pain.

“lixie,” you shouted, panic rising in your chest now. “stop! you have to stop—he’s done, you’ll get in trouble—”

still no reaction.

so you did the only thing you could think of.

you reached up with your hand and yanked the back of his hood. hard.

felix spun around, eyes wild, breath ragged.

“what the fuck are you doing?” he barked. “you shouldn’t even be—don’t touch me right now,”

his hands twitched at his sides, fists still clenched.

you felt him shudder.

his eyes darted down, finally seeing you—really seeing you— the dust on your face, the way your arm was wrapped around your shoulder like it was the only thing keeping you upright.

and that’s when minjae started to crawl.

slow.

stumbling. bloody. but not unconscious.

felix moved like he was going to lunge again—but you caught his wrist.

“don’t.” you said softly.

you then looked at minjae dead in the eye—every nerve in your body on fire.

“leave,” you said. “now.”

his jaw clenched like he wanted to say something—wanted to blame, defend, spit—but nothing came out. just a nod. slow. he stumbled to his feet, swayed, and started limping down the alley without a word.

and he didn’t look back.

not once.

as soon as minjae disappeared around the corner, your body finally gave out.

the adrenaline drained like water from a cracked glass—fast, all at once. your knees buckled, and the sharp pulse in your shoulder flared violently.

felix moved faster than gravity.

he caught you before you hit the ground, arms wrapping around you like instinct. one arm cradled your back, the other held your good side carefully—like he was afraid if he touched too hard, you’d shatter.

“i’ve got you. you’re okay,” he murmured, breath still coming fast.

your head dropped to his shoulder, dizzy, lightheaded, but finally still. you could feel his heartbeat through his hoodie—racing, unsteady.

he opened his mouth to speak—

“stop,” you whispered.

his throat bobbed as he swallowed. “y/n—”

“no,” you said, weak but clear. “you’re gonna say ‘i told you so.’ you’re gonna say, ‘i told you not to come out here alone.’”

you felt his jaw shift where your forehead rested against him.

but he didn’t say that.

“i was so scared,” he murmured, voice barely above a breath. “i thought—” he broke off, his breath catching. “when i turned the corner, and i saw him over you—”

you felt his grip tighten, just slightly. not enough to hurt. just enough to make sure you felt it.

“i thought i was too late.”

you pulled back just enough to look at him, your cheek brushing his as you moved.

your voice was quieter now. “now you really think i’m weak.”

his eyes snapped to yours—wide, startled, like you’d just said the most backwards thing he’d ever heard.

“no,” he said immediately. “god—no.”

you looked away. “you saw what happened. you saw what i let him—”

“i know you fought,” he said, cutting you off, voice firm now.

he cupped your jaw gently, guiding your gaze back to him.

“i’ve never thought you were weak.”

you blinked, throat burning.

“not once.”

“then why—” you started, voice raw.

but you didn’t get to finish.

because felix leaned in and kissed you.

right there.

on the dirty, cracked pavement of an alley that still smelled like dust and blood and fear.

his lips crashed into yours with something desperate, something breaking—like he’d been holding it back for too long and couldn’t keep it down another second. it wasn’t perfect. it was messy and trembling and full of all the things he couldn’t say.

and for a second, you froze.

caught between pain and shock and the wild, spinning realization that he was kissing you.

then—

then you melted.

your fingers twisted into the front of his hoodie, and you kissed him back with everything you had left. because felix was holding you like you were something fragile and powerful all at once.

and for the first time all night, you didn’t feel broken.

you felt wanted.

felix pulled away first, barely—his forehead still pressed to yours, breath shallow, like he was scared the moment would vanish if he let it go too fast.

your eyes stayed closed for a second longer, lips parted, heartbeat still stuttering in your chest.

then you whispered, “come over.”

he blinked, just enough space between you now to see the confusion flicker in his eyes.

you swallowed. “to my place. so we can get cleaned up.”

you let out a shaky breath, and slowly, with his help, pushed yourself off the cold pavement.

the walk home was quiet.

your shoulder throbbed with every step, and felix stayed close the whole way, not touching you unless he had to, but always near. 

by the time you reached your front door, your hands were shaking too much to get the key in on the first try. felix took it gently from your fingers and opened the door himself.

your family was away—out of town for the weekend—so the house was still, lights dim, the kind of hush that made every sound feel louder. you motioned toward your room and he nodded, heading down the hall while you slipped into the bathroom.

the adrenaline had long since worn off.

you changed into a loose cami top, careful with your movements, but still winced when the fabric brushed your shoulder. then you caught sight of it in the mirror.

a bruise, already darkening, was blooming across your skin—spreading like a storm cloud across your collarbone and creeping toward the edge of your chest. a band aid stuck on where the brick had torn through skin.

then turned off the light and walked back down the hall.

your room was quiet when you stepped in. felix was sitting on the edge of your bed, hoodie discarded, head in his hands. he looked up when he heard you—eyes flicking quickly to your shoulder, then back to your face.

and he looked like he’d just been punched again.

you crossed the room slowly and sat down beside him.

“i cleaned it up a bit,” you said, voice low. “disinfected it, but… i’ll go to a clinic in the morning. just to be safe.”

felix didn’t respond right away.

he was staring down at your hands now—resting in your lap, still faintly trembling. his own were curled together, clenched so tightly his bandaged knuckles had gone pale.

“felix,” you said gently.

still nothing.

so you turned to look at him fully.

his jaw was tight. his throat moved like he was trying to swallow words that wouldn’t go down. and his eyes were glossy, wide, swimming with something awful and barely contained.

you reached out, hand brushing lightly over his clenched fist.

“it’s okay,” you said softly. “it could’ve been much worse.”

his shoulders slumped at your words, like the weight of what didn’t happen was finally crashing down on him. he let out a shaky breath, and your heart ached just watching him unravel—still so tightly wound even in your room, even after everything. you leaned forward and kissed him again.

not desperate like in the alley. not rushed, not trembling.

just full of love.

his lips met yours like a reflex. his hand lifted slowly to your jaw, thumb brushing your cheek as he leaned into you, like he didn’t know how to stop once he started.

“i’ve wanted you,” he whispered against your lips. “for so long.”

you smiled into the kiss, brushing your nose against his. “me too, felix.”

you kissed him again, a little deeper this time, and he breathed out like he’d been holding it in for years.

“you deserve everything,” he murmured between kisses, his forehead pressed to yours. “every chance, every opportunity. you were always so strong, always learned so quick.”

you stilled.

the words landed quietly in your chest, like a gentle weight settling where doubt used to live.

“you’re not weak.” he added. “i just… i couldn’t go against you because…”

he swallowed, voice barely a breath now.

“if i saw you as an opponent… then maybe i could’ve done it,” he said. “maybe i could’ve stepped on that mat and said yes.”

he looked at you then—really looked. eyes shining with something that had nothing to do with tears now. something heavier. deeper.

“even if i saw you as a friend i could have done it. but i don’t see you that way, y/n.”

your heart beat once—loud.

his voice dropped, low and unguarded. “i see you, and all i can think is how badly i want to kiss you. how badly i want you to want me like that, too.”

his hand found your knee, tentative but deliberate, fingers curling slightly like he wasn’t sure how far you’d let him go.

“i want to kiss you ‘til you forget what it felt like to be scared,” he said. “i want to feel you underneath me, all of you, every part—because i’ve never wanted anyone like this. not once.”

your breath caught.

“i couldn’t do it, not because i think you’re incapable,” felix continued, his voice rough with something barely held back. “but because i love you.”

he didn’t flinch when he said it—didn’t stammer, didn’t hide. just looked at you like he’d already known it for years, and tonight had finally broken the last wall between knowing and saying.

your lips parted, but no sound came out.

so he kept going.

“i think i’ve been in love with you since we were fifteen,” he whispered. “and i just… kept hoping you’d figure it out first. because i didn’t want to lose what we had. i didn’t want to screw it up.”

you blinked hard. once. twice. the tears were already gathering. your throat felt tight.

“i didn’t know,” you said, voice cracking, small and trembling. “i mean—i think i did. i just didn’t want to ruin it either. i didn’t want to be wrong.”

felix exhaled—relieved, pained, everything at once.

“i love you too,” you said, barely above a whisper. “god, i think i always have.”

and then it broke.

you folded into him, and he caught you like gravity, arms wrapping around your waist, your hands finding his shirt, clutching at him like you couldn’t get close enough. you buried your face in his neck and tears spilled.

and he held you.

held you like you were something sacred.

like everything he’d ever wanted had been right in front of him all along.

you pulled back just enough to look at him, your eyes wet, your mouth trembling.

and then you whispered, “you can have me.”

felix didn’t speak. he didn’t need to.

his lips pressed to yours again. his hands cupped your face first then slid down, fingers brushing the curve of your neck like he was memorizing the shape of you.

your hands moved too. hesitant at first, but then bolder, threading through his hair. it was still damp in places, soft between your fingers. you tugged lightly, and he let out a breath against your mouth that was half a moan, half a surrender.

his tongue swept into your mouth and you gasped softly against his lips, body tightening instinctively at the heat curling low in your belly. you hadn’t expected it to be like this—every kiss landing like a jolt straight down your spine, your hips shifting without thinking, seeking friction that wasn’t there yet.

and he noticed.

he pulled back a little, breathing hard, lips pink and swollen, eyes searching yours. his gaze dropped—slow, deliberate—and lingered.

he looked at you like he was seeing you for the first time. not the uniform. not the sweat. not the bruises or the pain. just your body—loose cami thin against your chest, nipples stiffening beneath the fabric, your thighs bare where you’d changed into sleep shorts, your skin still marked faintly from the alley and the fight. and somehow, he looked at you like you were untouched. like you were the best thing he’d ever laid eyes on.

“you’re so beautiful,” he murmured.

your breath caught.

he touched the hem of your top gently, then looked up at you again. “have you ever done this before?”

you opened your mouth to speak—but no words came out at first.

instead, you shook your head once, slow. “not very much.”

you remembered his story. he’d hooked up with someone in his last year in highschool. you didn’t ask for details back then because it hadn’t been your business.

felix’s eyes stayed on yours, never darting away, even as his hand traced the hem of your cami, his fingers brushing just above your navel like he was testing how much of you he could touch without making you flinch.

“i’m gonna take care of you,” he whispered. “don’t worry.”

you nodded, breath shallow, chest rising fast beneath the thin fabric. the heat between your legs had returned tenfold, thick and pulsing, almost unbearable now that his mouth wasn’t on you. your thighs pressed together instinctively, trying to chase that pressure again.

felix noticed. he always noticed.

he leaned down and kissed you once—slowly, a kiss that lingered at the edges of your mouth like he didn’t want to leave any part of you untouched. his tongue slipped past your lips again, coaxing yours out with him, kissing you deeper until you whimpered against him.

his voice was barely audible. “can i take these off?”

he gestured to your shorts.

you nodded, heart pounding.

his hands were steady as he slid them down—past your hips, your thighs—until you lifted one leg, then the other, and they were gone. his eyes flicked up your body again, drinking in every inch. you could feel your pulse in your throat, in your wrists, between your legs—hot and wet now, your core aching with anticipation. 

his breath warmed the skin of your inner thigh as he sank down between your legs, his broad palms gliding slowly up the outside of your thighs to your hips, then back down again, deliberate and steady like he was grounding you, like he wanted every nerve in your body humming in anticipation. you were down to just your panties now—thin, soft cotton clinging wet between your legs, the fabric nearly translucent in the low light.

felix settled between your knees, kneeling at the edge of the bed, shoulders tense, jaw tight with restraint. his hands curled around your thighs and gently pushed them wider, the mattress shifting beneath your hips as you let him spread you open. you bit your lip, your heart hammering. his eyes never left your body.

then he leaned in.

at first, it was just his breath against your core—hot and steady, making your thighs tremble. and then his nose nudged gently against the damp spot between your legs, his mouth still just hovering, teasing. he inhaled, a sound low in his throat.

“mmm.” his eyes fluttered shut for a second. “you’re soaked,”

his fingers slid up the inside of your thighs again, brushing the elastic edges of your panties, then tracing along the drenched fabric—one stroke, featherlight, straight over your slit. your back arched instinctively, a gasp catching in your throat.

felix looked up at you again, eyes dark.

“yes,” you breathed. “please.”

his fingers curled around the sides of your panties and began to pull them down—inch by inch, excruciatingly slow. the wet fabric peeled away from your heat, sticking slightly before slipping down your thighs. you lifted your hips to help him, and he slid them down past your knees, your calves, and finally let them fall to the floor.

and then he just stared.

like he’d never seen anything so beautiful in his life.

“fuck,” he whispered, blinking slowly, almost dazed. “look at you…”

you flushed under the weight of his gaze, instinctively starting to move your legs to close—but his hands came up immediately, pressing gently on your thighs to keep them open.

“no. let me see you,” he said, his voice low and thick. “you’re perfect. so fucking perfect.”

his fingers ghosted back up your thighs, then parted you gently, and his breath hitched again.

“you’re dripping,” he said, almost to himself.

and then he leaned in.

he kissed your pussy—lips plush against your folds, his tongue just barely tasting at first. you gasped at the contact, your hips jerking, thighs tensing under his hands—but he moaned in response, hands tightening just enough to keep you steady.

“oh my god, felix—”

he didn’t answer. he didn’t need to. his tongue dragged up from your entrance, slow and sure, then circled your clit in gentle, teasing flicks. your back arched hard, and your hand flew down to his hair again, gripping the strands tight. he moaned when you did it—like the taste of you and the feeling of your fingers pulling at his scalp were driving him insane.

felix’s tongue was still moving, slow and insistent, when he suddenly paused—pulling back just enough to lift his face from between your thighs, his mouth slick with your arousal, lips parted, chest rising fast.

“you okay?” he said, voice low and rough, almost hoarse.

the absence of his tongue made your whole body twitch, your hips instinctively lifting like you could pull him back by gravity alone. your fingers stayed tangled in his hair, breath catching as you blinked down at him, cheeks flushed and heart pounding.

“yes,” you whispered. “i’m good—i’m… so good.” your voice wavered slightly, thick with need, but the truth burned behind every word. “i’ve wanted this for so long, felix.”

his eyes lit up—hungry, molten, tender.

“yeah?” he murmured. “been thinking about me down here?”

you whimpered, thighs trying to close from the ache. he grinned.

then he dove back in.

no hesitation this time. he tilted his head, shaking it just slightly side to side as he pushed deeper—his nose pressing tight against your mound, his tongue flat and wide as he licked straight up through your folds, deep and slow and relentless.

“ah, fuck—!” you cried out, hips lifting again.

and then—he pushed his tongue in.

he fucked you with it, wet and slow, making obscene, soaked sounds as your pussy clenched around nothing but his mouth. the tip of his tongue flexed as he pushed in again and again, steady, deliberate, your breath breaking on every push.

“felix—”

he groaned in response, and the sound vibrated through your whole core. his grip on your thighs tightened, holding you wide and open while his face stayed buried in your cunt, his jaw slick, tongue working like he was obsessed with the way you tasted, the way you moved, the way you shook every time he stroked just right.

he pulled out, licking a long, slow path all the way up your slit.

when he reached your clit, he swirled his tongue in perfect circles—each one just slightly firmer than the last. your fingers yanked his hair hard again, but he only hummed and pressed deeper.

he latched onto your clit again and sucked.

your entire body bowed off the bed with the force of it. his tongue flicked beneath the suction, hot and wet and insistent, your entire world collapsing to the point of contact between his mouth and your pulsing clit.

and he didn’t stop.

he moaned into your pussy, deep and guttural, the sound vibrating through every inch of you as he kept sucking, kept devouring, his tongue flicking in tight, practiced strokes. you could barely breathe, your hips rolling against his mouth, thighs trembling so hard you thought you might snap in half.

then he did it again—shook his head side to side, slow at first, then deeper, rougher, like he was trying to burrow into you, nuzzling against your pussy with pressure. your voice cracked open while your vision blurred.

that knot you knew too well from your own fingers under the covers, from those nights spent grinding into your palm with the lights off and felix’s name buried in your throat—was back. but this time, it wasn’t your imagination. it wasn’t your hand. it was him. his tongue. his mouth. his everything.

and it was so much better.

the feeling was sharp, coiled, rising fast. you gasped, moaned, writhed under him, the sweat slicking your chest, your hands sliding from the sheets back into his hair again, anchoring yourself to him like he was the only thing keeping you grounded.

“felix—” you panted, voice breaking, hips arching, “i'm gonna— i'm so close—”

so he didn’t speak. he didn’t risk it.

because if he said a word, if he so much as whispered your name, you’d lose it completely. and he wanted to guide you through it. wanted to feel you come undone beneath him.

so he just stayed right there, face buried in your cunt, lips suctioned around your clit with steady, maddening precision, tongue flicking faster now in that exact rhythm that had your whole body twitching. his hands gripped your thighs tight, grounding you, holding you open, thumbs brushing your skin in strokes—soothing in contrast to the ferocity of his mouth.

you sobbed—high, strangled.

your fingers clutched his hair like a lifeline, but you didn’t pull. you couldn’t. you were too far gone. your eyes rolled back as your vision blurred and your back arched, heels digging into the mattress, body drawing taut like a bow.

he felt it.

felt you tighten. felt your cunt pulse.

your orgasm ripped through you like fire.

you convulsed under him, crying out loud and broken, your body seizing in wave after wave of climax that felt like it would never end.

he guided you through it and stayed steady. his hands never let go. his tongue never missed a beat. and when your cries turned to gasping whimpers, when the shudders slowed, when your limbs finally collapsed back into the mattress, trembling and spent—

only then did he lift his head.

his lips were swollen, slick with you, chin wet, cheeks flushed. he looked at you like he’d just seen something holy. his eyes met yours.

your chest was still rising in quick, shallow breaths, your whole body humming with the echoes of release. muscles twitching, skin flushed, your legs limp where they’d once locked around his head. you felt wrecked—completely, thoroughly undone.

but when he leaned back in—his tongue sliding gently over your folds again, licking up the mess he’d made—you gasped, hips flinching. it was too much. the heat, the slick softness of his mouth against your overstimulated clit. your fingers twitched on the sheets, not from want but sheer sensitivity. and still, you didn’t tell him to stop. you whimpered instead, high and breathless, body twitching as he licked you clean.

you whimpered again when his tongue passed over your clit—just a brush this time, a flick more tease than touch.

you looked up at him through your lashes when he came back up to your level. he was gorgeous like this—his face flushed, his hair mussed where your hands had tangled in it, his mouth swollen.

“you were so good,” he said in awe. “so good for me.”

your cheeks burned at the praise. your body ached. but underneath the exhaustion, something else was burning now.

because you wanted more.

you wanted him.

you bit your lip, your voice barely a whisper. “felix…”

his brow furrowed gently, and he dipped lower, brushing his nose against yours. “yeah?”

you swallowed. your legs shifted beneath him, and the motion dragged your thigh against something hard.

oh.

he was hard—so hard, so ready, the press of him against your hip hot and solid and impossible to ignore.

and you wanted it. desperately.

“i want you,” you breathed.

his eyes darkened instantly. his jaw clenched. “yeah?”

you nodded, slow and steady, heart pounding all over again. “i want you inside of me.”

he exhaled like he’d been holding it in for hours. his hips rocked against you once—barely controlled—and you felt the full length of him, thick and pulsing, pressed against your thigh through his boxers.

“you sure?” he asked, voice husky. 

“i’m sure,” you whispered. “i want it. i want you.”

he leaned in and kissed you again—slower this time, more grounded, but still with that same edge of hunger curling just beneath the surface. his lips moved against yours like he already knew what came next. like he was already imagining it.

felix pulled back just slightly, just enough to see you fully, his eyes scanning your face like he was checking every breath, every signal, every heartbeat.

“you can do it.” he murmured,

but then you followed his gaze—down to where his hips hovered just above yours, the hard line of him straining visibly against the fabric of his sweatpants, the tip already darkening the cotton with pre-come.

your mouth parted. and slowly—your hands moved.

he didn't flinch when your fingers found the waistband of his sweats, didn’t stop you when you pushed them down inch by inch, the elastic dragging low over his hips, revealing skin, then more, then—

you swallowed hard.

his cock sprang free the second you tugged his boxers past his thighs. thick. hard. long and flushed and glistening at the tip. he was perfect—desperately hard and twitching in your palm before you’d even touched him properly.

you looked up at him once, silently asking.

he nodded, jaw locked, chest rising.

so you wrapped your hand around him.

he shuddered the moment your fingers closed around his shaft—his whole body jolting like he’d been electrocuted, breath catching sharp in his chest.

then—like he was pulling himself out of a trance—he shifted, reaching one hand blindly toward the floor, fingers groping for the edge of his jacket. he pulled it closer, found something in the zipper pocket—a small foil packet.

you stopped him.

your hand curled around his wrist, gentle.

“it’s okay,” you said softly.

his eyes locked on yours. “y/n—”

“i’m on the pill,” you murmured. “i trust you.”

his lips parted. for a second, he didn’t speak—just stared at you like you’d said something sacred. something that made his whole body go still.

and then he dropped the packet to the floor.

he hovered over you, breath hot and trembling against your lips, one arm braced beside your head while the other reached down, steadying himself. but he paused, just barely, the tip of his cock resting against your soaked entrance, heat pulsing between your bodies like a current too charged to touch.

his eyes locked on yours again—wild, tender, reverent.

“are you sure?” he asked, voice low and hoarse, like asking cost him.

you nodded.

slow. certain.

your hand rose to cup his jaw, thumb brushing his flushed cheekbone. “i’ve never been more sure.”

he inhaled sharply—and let it out in a broken moan. not quiet. not restrained. just raw, honest sound spilling from somewhere deep inside him.

“okay,” he breathed. “okay. then you go for it, baby.”

his head dropped for a second, forehead pressing to yours, his whole body shaking with the force of trying to hold back. you felt him twitch against your entrance, the thick head of his cock nudging just slightly into your folds, dragging through your wetness.

you blinked up at him, dazed. “what?”

he pulled back just slightly, his hand guiding himself again, lining up with your pussy, the swollen head pressing flush against your entrance. and then he looked you dead in the eyes.

“you take me,” he said. “however slow you need. however deep you want. you do it.”

and he meant it. his voice didn’t shake this time. his gaze didn’t falter. he wanted you to be in control. even now—especially now.

so you reached down with one trembling hand and wrapped your fingers around his cock again, guiding him back down between your thighs. you could feel the heat of him, the size of him—heavy and thick and so fucking real.

your breath caught as you positioned him, the head of his cock pressing right against your entrance now.

he moaned again—guttural this time, a sound pulled from deep in his chest.

“god, you feel so warm already,”

you pushed your hips up, slow, and felt him begin to breach you.

just the tip.

the stretch burned.

sharp, but not unbearable. not when he was watching you like that—eyes wide, lips parted, chest heaving like you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

you gasped, and he stilled.

“you good?” he whispered.

you nodded—bit your lip, adjusted, let yourself breathe.

then you did it again. this time he met you halfway

pushed up another inch. took more of him. 

and he groaned—low and long, head dropping to your shoulder as his arms tensed beside you.

“oh my goodness, y/n—”

you were so wet, so tight, every inch of him dragging against nerves you hadn’t known could feel like this. the pressure was intense, dizzying, your body opening inch by inch to take him in.

and he let you do it.

let you set the pace.

let you guide him in, until you were gasping and whimpering and his cock was buried almost halfway, throbbing and hot, your walls pulsing around him like your body didn’t know how to handle it all.

“you’re doing so good,” he breathed, kissing your cheek, your jaw, your temple. “so fucking good—keep going, baby, if you can.”

you braced your hands against his shoulders, breath shallow, thighs trembling. the last stretch was the hardest—your body pulsing around the thick base of him, nerves lit up everywhere, tight and aching, every part of you drawn taut with the strain of holding him there.

but you wanted this. all of it.

you shifted your hips, exhaling slowly as you pushed upward—one more inch. then another. until he bottomed out.

he was buried to the hilt now, thick and hot and pulsing inside your cunt, your walls stretched around him so tight he could barely breathe. his hands trembled where they gripped your waist, holding himself still—barely—like one more twitch would break the world in half.

“y/n,” he choked out, voice guttural. “you’re so tight, baby, so tight—i can barely—” he bit down on the inside of his cheek, jaw clenched like a vice.

your fingers flexed against his back, and you nodded, panting through the ache, through the pressure. “it’s okay,” you whispered. “you can move. please—move.”

his eyes snapped open. he searched your face, breath still ragged, and nodded slowly.

then he pulled out—just an inch, then another—and pushed back in.

the drag of him inside you, even that small motion, lit your body up from the inside. the friction was perfect. unrelenting. he filled every inch, stretched you to your limit, and your pussy clung to him like your body didn’t want to let go.

felix whispered. “i can slow down.”

he pulled out again, just enough to make you feel empty, then slid back in deeper. you cried out, clinging to him now, hips tilting up to meet him, chasing it.

“faster, you can go faster,” you gasped.

he obeyed.

his pace quickened, still careful but less restrained now—his cock thrusting into you with a slick, wet rhythm, your soaked pussy gripping him like a vice with every motion. the room echoed with the sound of your bodies—flesh on flesh, breathless cries, the obscene, soaking drag of his cock through your tight cunt.

“fuck,” he growled. “this pussy is taking me so good, like it was made for me.”

your head tipped back, a fresh moan spilling from your lips. “it was—”

his hips stuttered.

something flickered across his face then—darker, hungrier.

“you don’t even know what you do to me,” he murmured. “you think i haven’t thought about this? all those nights jerking off with your name in my throat.”

you whimpered.

he leaned over you more fully, chest brushing your breasts, one hand sliding up to cradle your face while he kept thrusting into you—slow now, deeper, grinding into you with each roll of his hips.

“you’re letting me ruin you,” he whispered. “god, you’re so wet for it.”

you moaned—high, trembling, helpless. “i love you—”

his rhythm faltered, but only for a second.

“say it again,” he demanded, voice thick.

“i love you,” you sobbed, clinging to him as your body started to coil again, pressure building low and hot and desperate. “i love you, felix, please don’t stop—”

he didn’t.

he fucked you harder now—not rough—but deep, fast, each thrust grinding right into your tightest spot, your pussy clenching around him like you couldn’t bear to let go. he shifted his angle slightly, driving into you from just a little lower, and your whole body jerked.

your breath tore out of you. "felix—!"

this wasn’t the soft spread of orgasm he’d coaxed out with his mouth. this was different. sharper. hotter. it burned from the inside out, like he was hammering that sweet bundle of nerves over and over again, your orgasm uncoiling too fast.

and he saw it.

he felt it.

his hand dropped between you, fingers finding your clit with practiced ease, two slick digits rubbing tight little circles as he thrust deep, dragging your soaked pussy right against his knuckles every time.

“give it to me, y/n,” he growled, voice raw and low in your ear. “come on. i know that look—you’re right there. like when you break that last board—focus. let go. fucking give it to me.”

you couldn’t hold back.

it slammed into you—fast, sharp, blinding—your entire body locking, then releasing, the pleasure exploding out of you with a cry that tore your throat raw.

your orgasm ripped through your pelvis.

a hot gush of slick pulsed out of you, soaking his cock, his fingers, the sheets beneath you. you cried out, shaking violently, back arching off the bed, vision going white as your body convulsed through it.

felix choked on a groan, grinding his hips deep into your trembling pussy as he held you there, watching it happen, feeling you squirt on him.

“fuck, baby—oh my god—”

he didn’t stop moving, didn’t stop working your clit, didn’t stop fucking that spot, chasing every last drop of that orgasm.

your breath was ragged, your voice barely there, but the words came anyway—raw, open, needy.

“come inside me, felix,” you whispered, your nails dragging lightly down his back. “i want to feel it. i want all of you.”

he growled—actually growled—a sound ripped from deep in his chest, something dark and unfiltered and desperate.

“you want my cum, baby?” he panted, hand sliding down to grip your thigh, holding you wide open beneath him. “you want me to ruin you for everyone else?”

“yes,” you gasped. “yes, felix, please—do it, come inside me—”

that broke him.

he fucked into you hard—once, twice, three more brutal strokes—and then froze, every muscle in his body locking as he buried himself to the base.

he groaned loud into your neck and you felt it.

felt the heat flood inside you, pulse after pulse of release spilling into your still-clenching pussy. he rocked through it, hips twitching, groaning your name as he filled you completely, your slick and his cum mixing deep inside you, dripping between your thighs.

he stayed like that, chest heaving, cock twitching, holding you close as the last waves of it ran through him.

you lay there, breath shallow and scattered, limbs trembling beneath the weight of everything. you felt him still buried inside you, twitching gently, his length softening but still locked within your body like he couldn’t bear to leave just yet.

you were dazed.

and when you blinked up at him—his hair sweat-damp and wild, his chest rising fast, his eyes fixed on you like you were everything—he smiled, slow and aching.

“my girl,” he whispered, voice rough. he pressed a kiss to your cheek, then your temple. your heart thudded.

and when he leaned back just enough to see your face, brushing a thumb down your jaw. “i love you.”

the words cracked something wide open in you.

you reached up, threading your fingers into his hair, pulling him back down into a kiss—lips barely moving because you didn’t have the strength to make it anything more. but it said enough.

you pulled back, breath caught, eyes wide and glassy.

“i love you too, felix.” you touched his cheek. “stay over?”

his answer came without hesitation.

he nodded.

then pressed another kiss to your lips—brief, tender—before slowly, carefully pulling out. you winced slightly, and he soothed you immediately, whispering quiet things under his breath.

“sorry, baby, i got you, just relax.”

you felt him drip out of you and you shivered at the sensation, more from how intimate it felt than anything else.

felix padded to your bathroom and when he came back, he was gently kneeling beside the bed and wiping between your legs.

he kissed your knee, then slipped out quietly. you heard the bath running. when he returned, he lifted you gently from the bed, carrying you into the bathroom. later, he curled into bed beside you.

arms around your waist. breath on your neck.

the world faded.

only him. only you.

you were breathing hard—sweat dripping down your temple, your pulse pounding in your ears, muscles burning from effort. the match had dragged longer than expected. every counter was faster, every feint smarter. your opponent wasn’t backing down.

and neither were you.

a front kick met your side—hard but clean. you spun with it, dropping into a low stance to recover, your feet sliding against the mat. a beat passed. then another.

your opponent came at you again. you blocked, pivoted, struck out with a side kick, but he ducked low and swept your leg—not enough to knock you down, just enough to unbalance. you hissed through your teeth and shot forward, aiming a punch straight toward his ribs.

suddenly, he shifted left.

and his arm hit your good shoulder.

your breath caught as you staggered back half a step.

and that’s when he moved in.

one clean motion. a grappling combo you’d seen before—but rarely felt like this.

your opponent took you down.

and suddenly, the world tilted. you were flat on your back, shoulders pinned, your breath knocked clean out of your chest. 

you stayed still for half a second, blinking up at them, the lights glaring in your peripheral.

then you tapped out. quick, three times.

the pressure eased immediately.

he rolled off with practiced ease and leaned over, hand rubbing your back softly.

“good match,” he murmured.

you pushed up slowly, breath still shallow, shoulder aching just a bit where the blow had landed. but you couldn’t help the half-smile that pulled at your lips.

coach stepped forward from the sideline. “nice takedown, felix.”

you huffed a short laugh. “finally,” you muttered, shooting felix a sideways look.

he grinned sheepishly, cheeks pink. his hair was soaked, plastered to his forehead, and his uniform clung to his back with sweat. but his eyes were sparkling.

coach added, “that’s the only one you’ve taken so far.”

felix scratched the back of his neck. “yeah, well. i’m pacing myself.”

you chuckled and reached out, smacking his arm lightly. “i let you have that one.”

he caught your hand before it dropped, squeezed it once.

then let it go.

the coach stepped forward, arms crossed over his chest, gaze unreadable as it flicked between the two of you.

you both turned toward him, sweat still clinging to your necks, uniforms rumpled and streaked with dust from the mats. you and felix both reached up and took off your helmets.

the coach paused for a beat. then:

“i’ve made my decision.”

your heart jumped into your throat. felix straightened beside you, wiping the back of his hand across his forehead.

the coach looked at you. “y/n.”

there was a pause.

“sir…?”

coach nodded. “you’ve been consistent. adaptable. fast. you held your ground every time. you’ve proved yourself.”

“i was holding back in the others,” felix said quickly. “can we have one more match?”

the coach didn’t soften. “you gave your best in that last one. and so did she. decision’s final.”

felix didn’t argue. just stood there, chest rising, then falling, as something in him settled.

he turned to you.

you were still staring at him with a worried expression. but he smiled.

small. honest.

“i’m not gonna lie and say i’m not crushed,” he said, laughing under his breath. “because i am.”

your lips curled into a smile.

“but,” he added, eyes locked on yours, “i’m also really fucking proud of you.”

your throat was tight, but the smile pulled at your face anyway, a little shaky. you turned to the coach and bowed.

“thank you, sir. really.”

coach gave a short nod, then glanced down at his clipboard. but not before you caught the faintest curve of a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth.

you turned back to felix and threw your arms around his neck without thinking. his hands came around your waist instantly before he lifted you.

your feet left the mat, your arms tightening in surprise as a small yelp escaped your lips. “felix!”

he laughed, that full-throated, breathless sound you hadn’t heard since you were kids.

as felix set you down, you caught it.

the coach.

still watching.

his eyes flicked from you to felix, then back again.

you furrowed your brows. “what?”

“nothing,” coach said, too quickly, a smile tugging at his lips. “just… you two make a good team.”

your eyes narrowed. “no, what was that look?”

“look?” he repeated, feigning innocence like a man who definitely was not innocent.

you glanced at felix. he was already biting the inside of his cheek, trying not to laugh, failing miserably. his ears were turning pink.

you turned back to the coach. “sir—”

“good work today,” he said, backing off. “see you both tomorrow.”

and he disappeared into his office, closing the door behind him.

you stared after him, then slowly turned to felix.

you groaned into your hands. “god.”

felix laughed, gently peeling your hands away from your face as his eyes flicked past you for half a second. a little group of junior belts was trailing through the far hallway, chattering and bouncing off the walls like they’d just mainlined sugar.

he looked back at you, mischief blooming across his face. his hand still held yours.

and then—without warning—he kissed you.

right there in the middle of the mats, with the scent of floor cleaner and sweat still in the air and your chest protector half-hanging off your side.

your eyes widened.

you made an undignified squeak into his mouth and instantly melted against him.

then you grabbed his hand.

felix barely had time to register it before you were tugging him down the hall, past the main mat, into one of the empty practice rooms. the second the door shut behind you—

click.

he had you against the wall.

your belt hit the floor.

changbin who was strutting past the hallway from the studio when he overheard some trainees’ conversation. discussing how the cafeteria's lady resigned her contract, earning her pension after years of dedication to the company.

he was taken aback, being close to the old lady's kindness since debut. though glad that she's able to rest now, he just feels a bit sad. sure that he'll miss her lots.

changbin who finds a commotion as he enters the cafeteria for lunch, a whole bunch of people crowding the canteen. his eyes narrow, confused; he nudges the closest person.

“what's going on?” he asks.

“it's the new lunch lady, apparently she's really pretty.”

changbin who doesn't buy it. even if she's pretty, so what? is that enough to create such chaos. he tsks, hungry and tired from his ongoing schedule. his feet aching, body limp of energy. Impatient by the time he reaches for his turn.

“next person,” he hears, lifting his eyes absently from his phone screen when they land on you.

you.

changbin whose thumb stills from scrolling when he takes you in, his mouth uncharacteristically drying up. his voice stolen. unable to mutter anything out when your lashes flutter at him, a blinding smile plastered on your stupidly pretty face. waiting for him to order.

“hello! what would you like to have?” you greet, gloved hands clasped together in a polite approach.

you.

he'd like to say you.

“Oh. I—,” he stutters, whatever he wanted to eat, completely forgotten. his hunger flying by the window when you tilt your head to the side in confusion. blinking naively.

he fumbled, he thinks.

however you beam up, a giggle escaping your parted lips. “sir, do you want today's recommendations?” you ask, laughter sounding even better than he imagined. “i’m new here, but i could give you my personal favourites.”

“yeah,” he replies. too fast. too eager. face flushed despite you having done absolutely nothing to entice this sort of reaction from him.

god, you're going to be trouble.

changbin who's evident about his big fat crush on you. giddy like a teenage boy whenever lunch time arrives. so excited to meet you even after the fuss of your arrival dies out.

making sure to wait in your serving line whenever he has to buy something, no matter if the line is too long or not. arriving to practice or studio late, earning knowing complaints from the other members, laughing it out coyly. ears reddening when they advise him to ask you out already, quickly dismissing them.

changbin who becomes a regular. he's been one. but now? not a break where he isn't at the cafeteria, and he swears—he swears that it's mutual.

how you scan the room doesn't go unnoticed, because he's always looking at you. pupils darting to every corner till they land on him, your lips curving into that familiar greeting. palm sticking out hesitantly the first few times you've done it. confident today, waving at him enthusiastically, calling for him to come over under the guise of knowing his order by heart.

“the usual, seo-ssi?”

he nods, clocking how the tip of your tongue peeks out of the corner of your mouth, brows knitted in focus as you pack up his order. your fingers brush with his when you hand him the packaging, the warmth seeping through despite the cold latex of your gloves.

“come again,” you say but he doesn't budge. frozen in place and you blink at him. waiting. “anything else?”

he swallows, eyes fixed on you. “you can call me changbin, no need for formality.”

you gasp. glancing sideways for signs of anyone overhearing. it's just him. he's last in line—he always is—sure that he does it on purpose.

“seo-ssi… i wouldn't dare to,” you reply, cheeks warming in embarrassment. “not in the work setting.”

“it's just us.”

us.

“no one else is here, you can say it.” he urges, wondering how the syllables would sound off  your mouth.

it's the first time he's seen this expression on you, and he might be in love. ideas of what other expressions he could coax out of you flashing in his mind.

“okay,” you mutter, not taking much to get you to fold under his pressuring gaze. “chang-bin,” it rolls off your tongue so well, as if you were made to say it. scream it. he's entranced, you're getting so shy just saying his name. it's messing with him. “is that okay…?

“again.”

you frown, a sudden tension coating the air. “—huh?”

“my name. say it again.”

changbin who's got you sprawled on the kitchen counter, legs spread wide and shaking while he finally gets a taste of you. face snuzzled in your sweetness, apron rucked all the way up because he refuses to take it off you, too cute wrapped around your waist in a knot at the back.

your fingers are entangled in his hair, curly and messy in how strong your grip is. “changbin–” you whine out when he sucks on your sensitive clit, pussy leaking on his fingers, wetting them in lewd squelches. you accidentally pull on his hair, blabbering apologies but he only moans into you. the sound vibrating throughout your entire body.

it's late. anybody could walk in—the security guard, someone looking for a late night snack from the vending machine, your boss. however, changbin doesn't care. he wishes someone would walk in on you. lips swollen from how harshly he had kissed you, clothes creased, panties rolled to your ankles. knuckles deep in your cunt, face pressed to your heat. getting the meal he's been craving for ever since he's laid eyes on you.

“come on, give me another one bun,” he encourages. you had just came, and he's already greedy for another. so fucking tasty on his tongue, the cafeteria's meals couldn't compare. he pumps his digits in, far bigger than yours, spreading you open for him. licking past your labia, lashes shut as if he was the one receiving pleasure. he scissors you wide, making space for his wet muscles. the hotness of it has you struggling for breath, thighs twitching close, his overbearing figure preventing you from doing so. your sweaty palm slips off the counter when his spit mixes with your arousal, a pool forming underneath you, his chin coated with everything you're giving him.

you're close. fucking close when you jerk your head back, teeth digging onto your lower lip. pussy convulsing around him when it crashes down, soaking his mouth as he helps you ride it out, thumb spreading your lips apart for him to lap at. drinking you in. “could eat this everyday,” he mumbles, burning puffs of air adding to your ache. “will you serve me this usual too?”

changbin who lets this happen again.

safe to say that you're his personal favourite.

gaze puncturing holes at the back of your skull despite his chirpy and joyous behavior whenever he comes in during the morning. when it's bustling with personnel. only you can tell what he's thinking behind his innocent grin, knowing that he's the sole one in this room who's got you accidentally sputtering nonsense, cheeks dusting a darker shade in his proximity.

changbin who's got you bent over in the storage room as soon as your shift is complete. digging crescents on the flesh of your hips, occasionally toying with the ribbon of your apron while actively blowing your back.

“shh, bunny. keep quiet for me,” he whispers, leaning forward to clasp a palm on your squealing mouth. muffling your moans and cries. heavy pants and grunts next to your ear, his thrusts roughly meeting your ass, leaving your cheeks red and sore. he takes euphoria in your fucked out expression, heavy balls meeting your clit with every snap to your heat. cackling at your figure as if he wasn't fucking the life out of it. he's so huge. everything about him is huge—including his fat cock. breaking your poor virgin pussy. he had learned that you were one not long ago after the night he ate you out. feeling bad for not giving you a proper first time, but he couldn't fucking resist anymore. the obnoxious sentiment shattering when the sight of your latex hands trying to desperately stick to anything before you hits him, forehead mushed on the cold surface of the counter. eyes watering, unable to behold this newfound pleasure coursing through your body.

you're so adorable. he could break you all night.

changbin who gets you to his dorm in the end, literally kicking hyunjin out for the night under the single purpose of ruining you.

he needs to.

once isn't enough, you're addictive like sugar. good thing he adores sugary things.

you can barely walk, steps wobbly as he guides you in his home. not even make it to the bedroom before he throws you onto the nearest couch, any articles of clothing adorning you long forgotten.

his lips are everywhere. sucking nasty hickeys across your skin, teeth nipping at the tender flesh. threatening to break in at any given moment. he's trying to be gentle, it's hard when you're so eager to please that he has to teach you how to suck dick.

“wanna try?” he asks, his smile meeting his ears when you nod feverishly.

“say aah.” heavy cock slaps against your cheek, hinting for you to open your mouth.

he shoves it up to the hilt the second you part your lips, coughing and choking around him. tears brim up the corner of your eyes, vision blurring when he hits your throat. trying your best not to gag. the sound travels immediately to his cock, somehow stiffening further inside your wet mouth. “shit, baby. it's fine, you can gag on it. you're supposed to.”

changbin who lets go of any thread of sanity left in him after the first few thrusts. he has you laid out on the couch, head thrown all the way to the back on the couch's arm rest—plowing into your mouth without mercy. the duality of the first blushing changbin you met blowing you off.

you're blowing him alright.

there's a bulge in your throat, the tip of his cock prominent within your tightness. pussy clenching around nothing, screaming for him to stuff you full right after. to cum inside you instead. his balls tighten at the mere thought, his thrusts growing harder as if the goal’s to snatch away your ability to speak.

changbin who abruptly pulls out when he feels you on the verge of passing out from the lack of oxygen, letting you take a gigantic gasp as soon as his girth leaves you. strings of drools attached to his sensitive skin and he moans. full on whines at the sight, somehow still coming off as rough. patting your cheeks, thumb brushing the saliva off your gaping lips. red and swollen from his jarring behavior. he's sorry, he swears. however it doesn't show when he manhandles you to your knees, arms hanging on the back of the couch as he angles your hips up. cunt on full display for him.

changbin who isn't soft in his approach, plunging his hard cock back in with ease. surprisingly back in shape despite having fucked you loose earlier. “such a good pussy—hah. so quick to regain form. could fuck that all night, you'd like that? want binnie to fuck you allll night?”

“mgh–! binnie!” you repeat the nickname in a cry and he throbs inside. dangerous in how quick you're to put him on the edge. hips faltering in order to catch his breath, frown squeezed in how he's trying his best to keep it in. “binnie– binnie don't stop pleassee. keep fucking me—” you blabber, complete bullshit in anyone's ear but his.

he curses, flipping you onto your back. flat on the expensive cushions, creating a total mess on the fabric. hyunjin will probably throw a tantrum tomorrow, but he doesn't give a fuck. legs thrown over his big shoulders, biceps working to keep you in a mating press when he suddenly dives in. bottoming out entirely, snatching the dirtiest squeak out of your guts. “so tiny, can see my fucking dick from here—” he says in a huff, attention glued on the movement of him visible in your stomach.

pushing your knees forward, desperate to cum inside already. his thrusts’ violent and erratic, not the tenderness you'd expect for a first time. and you're fucking obsessed. in love with him. infatuated with the pressure of his curve, his veins, dragging past your sensitive walls. Tightening around him, hugging him in a squeeze—trapping him inside for more.

he knows. gaze traveling to your scrunched expression, the whole of you bare and disheveled. he's close too. he lets go of your legs, mouth finding yours in a searing kiss. lips soft on you, deeply contrasting with how he's treating you. legs wrapping themselves around his hips, caging him into quick shallow thrusts. he moans into your mouth, the sound escaping from how you're both breathing through the gaps. his pelvis rubs against your nub, driving you past the finishing line. the thread cutting in accomplishment.

changbin who swears that he fucking sees white when you cum around him, squirting all over his cock. slipping out from how soaked you're getting. thighs quivering violently as you thrash your way past the overwhelming sensation, nails cutting at his nape, most likely drawing blood. pushing right in the second you're done, so easy to nestle where he belongs. tears flow uncontrollably past your cheeks while he coos at you.

just a few more. he reassures. he's there, right there.

changbin who finally gets to release his load, filling you to the brink with all he's got. chest heaving with a sharp exhale, staring at your broken expression in a daze. his heart squeezes at the idea that you let him hit it raw. marking you up as his.

changbin who wouldn't mind doing this again. sure that it is—in fact—mutual.

permanent taglist: @shuporanporang

Dating an idol had its downsides, they can be gone for months at a time, you cant go public, fans can be insane sometimes.

Despite that you'd never change a single thing with Seungmin.

The dominATE tour is finish their European leg of the tour — meaning the boys finally get to 'rest'. Also meaning you get your boyfriend back after months of face times, fucked up time zones and countless sleepless nights missing him.

'Boarding now, don't miss me too much'

Was the last text he sent you, with an attachment of a photo of him at the gate. You know he's getting home soon, sharing his flight details with you so you 'don't stress over him'/

You've been stress cleaning your apartment since he left his hotel to come home. And when you run out of things to clean — you organised.

There was no reason for you to be stressed out, you just missed him. Sure you tried to face time every night and he always responded to your long winded rants and messages, even if it was a few hours late because he was preforming or practicing.

But nothing beats him.

You've officially run yourself ragged making sure everything was perfect, making sure you had his favourite snacks on hand, making sure everything was perfect for him.

You're sitting on the couch — the TV playing whatever was on the front page of Netflix, you try to watch but fail. You also trying scrolling on your phone but you end up watching the minutes pass waiting for when you know his flight lands.

You only snap back to reality when you hear keys jingle and the door knob twist — immediately checking the time. 'his flight lands in an hour?' you question in your head. Quickly any thoughts are silenced when Seungmin walks through the door hauling his suitcase behind him.

You instantly fling yourself off the couch making 3 long strides before your in his arms. his arms instantly ingulf you, one cradling your head the other around you.

"What — I thought —" You stammer out your words quickly being silenced.

"Wanted to surprise you." He mumbles into your hair, his hold on you tightening.

He's here, after 3 and a half excruciatingly painful months apart 'hes' here. In your arms, not just through a screen.

"You said you landed at 3" your words muffled against his shoulder, no bite behind them, your fingers grasping at the fabric of his hoodie, grounding you — as if you let go he'll disappear all over again.

"Strategic lying." Seungmin hums slightly, his finger threading through your hair, like he's trying to memorise you all over again.

"Jackass.." You whisper, your voice unsteady — your emotions finally catching up to you.

Seungmin only pulls away enough to look at you, his hands cupping your face to look at him.

"It was only a few months." He mumbles, the words losing all meaning considering he looks 5 minutes away from falling apart himself.

You let out a laugh as you bite back a smile. "God do you ever shut up —"

You're quickly silenced, Seungmin cutting you off with his lips against yours.

His hands holding your face like you will fall apart if he lets go, holding onto his arms, he deepens the kiss.

Its slow and reverent, full of longing and love. You gasp into the kiss which he immediately swallows. Not allowing you to move an inch away from you, his tongue glides against your bottom lip, before pulling back, not going far.

Seungmin's forehead rests against yours, his nose nudging yours as you both catch your breath.

"I missed you." He says breathlessly, his eyes meeting your glossy ones.

"Tours made you soft on me, Min." You cant help but tease him, smiling softly. He doesn't respond, only pressing his lips against yours again, like he's trying to make up for months of lost time.

His lips move against yours, pouring all his love and devotion into it.

You both move in sync to your room, guiding each other blindly through your apartment, when you bumping into a wall you both still.

You giggle into the kiss causing it to break, he follows laughing against your lips. You look up at him, holding back your laughter, smiling wide.

Both of your smiles soften as you look at each other, his thumbs running up and down your neck, basking in just you.

He grabs a hold of your hand pulling you into your shared room — which is uncharacteristically spotless.

"Did Chan stop by?" He teases pulling you into him again his hands holding onto your waist as you let out an exasperated sigh, rolling your eyes at him.

"Shut up." You glare at him teasingly as he laughs, pressing a quick kiss to your lips before pulling back.

A moment passes, a comfortable silence as you just exist with each other.

No tour, no dance practice, no nothing. Just you and Seungmin.

"Never letting you leave again." You mutter, your hands tightening around his hoodie, grounding yourself.

"I don't think the company would like that." He brushes some hair from your face.

"Since when did you care about the company." You hum, fiddling with his hoodie looking at him.

"Since they let me come back early to surprise you." He flicks your forehead slightly before you feign a gasp trying to walk away before he grabs your arm pulling you back to him.

His lips crash onto yours, capturing them in a desperate kiss. Seungmin's hands are all over you, grasping at whatever he can to ground himself, utterly captivated by you.

Moving together you fall onto your bed, Seungmin hovering over you — Seungmin's legs on either side of your hips, one hand by your head holding himself up, the other cupping your jaw as he kisses you with need.

Seungmin jokes, about everything but fuck — the last few months without you have been hell. Nearly flying out to you multiple times, the only thing that stopped him was your own worry about him getting in trouble.

Seungmin's lips press a final kiss to your lips before dipping, kissing the skin of your jaw.

His hands sliding up and down your sides, sending shivers down your spine, his fingers hot against your cold skin. Seungmin's lips pressing reverent kisses along your skin — slowing kissing down your jaw to the column of your neck, each kiss desperate — trying to pour months of separation into it.

Tilting your head back — giving Seungmin easier access to your neck, he simply hums, his fingers slipping under your shirt, skirting over your skin — cold from the chill of the apartments air.

Seungmin's fingers brush right under your chest — making you take a sharp breath, one of his hands hold you in place — Seungmin nips at the skin of your neck before pulling back.

"Missed you so much." He mumbles, you can barely hear him.

"Min.." You whisper, a small plea — not exactly knowing what you're pleading for.

"Shh, I know, I know — I got you, baby." His breath ghosts your skin.

Seungmin's hands roaming your body, mapping out your skin as if he's trying to memorise it all over again.

His fingers slip under the band of your shorts, his fingers tracing over your panties, which are clinging to your cunt.

"God — you're unreal.." He mutters under his breath, talking to himself more than you,

A whine leaves your lips as you buck desperately into his touch.

Seungmin ignores your fleeting attempts; focused on how you feel under him, he can feel you soaked through your panties.

His fingers dip into the fabric — immediately feeling your slicked folds against his fingers. The feeling of you warm against his fingers pulls an unexpected sound from him before cursing under his breath.

"All for me huh, forgot how needy you get after tours.." His tones steady — almost like he's talking to himself more than you. His fingers brush down your folds, pulling a choked moan from your lips, your hips bucking up trying to meet his touch.

Seungmin retracts his fingers from your panties — making you immediately whine in annoyance, you're about to move your hands down to touch yourself if he wasn't going to but Seungmin quickly grabs your wrist — feeling your pulse race against his fingers.

He holds you in place his gaze determined but soft. Seungmin pulls you up to him before shifting you up against the pillows, his hold on your wrist loosens as his fingers skim down your body, before holding onto your the skin of your thighs, settling himself settling himself in between them.

"Lift your hips, pretty." He says softly, just audible enough for you to hear through your foggy haze.

Seungmin's fingers make quick work, pulling down your panties which you happily do. The panties falling somewhere beside your bed.

An impatient whine leaves your lips which quickly turns into a surprised moan when Seungmin's licks a stripe up your slit, your hands immediately tangling in his hair, arching into his touch.

His grip on your thighs tighten as you squirm around under him, grounding you to him.

"Gonna show you how much I missed you." Seungmin's words echo — barely comprehending them before you feeling his lips attach to your aching clit.

He sucks on the sensitive bud, one of his hands snaking off your thigh, his middle finger and ring finger running down your slit, catching on your glistening folds.

A string on nonsensical whimpers leave your lips, desperate pleas for more.

Seungmin's teeth graze your clit making you jolt, tugging on his hair, causing a domino effect of him moaning into your cunt — making you tug harder.

His fingers trace your entrance, pulling soft whines from your lips as you squirm under him.

"Min, s-stop teasing." Your voice breaks with its plea, Seungmin looks up at you, his eyes hard and lingering on you.

He doesn't acknowledge you with words, his eyes leave yours, focusing back onto your pussy.

His lips leave your clit making you whine, his fingers spread in a 'v' shape across your pussy spreading your wetness. You look down at him and he looks mesmerised, like he's enjoying this more than you just by looking at you.

Seungmin lets out a breath as his fingers continue tracing at your pussy, treating you like a toy for his amusement.

His lips go back to your clit, sucking on it like its his purpose, teeth grazing the sensitive bud every so often. you feel one of his fingers finally push in.

Sure when he was gone you touched yourself, the vibrator he got you was used whenever your late night face times had you needy and hot. But your fingers can only do so much — and nothing can stretch you like him.

Seungmin's finger presses into you, feeling your walls clench around him, makes him groan into your clit, his other hand squeezes your thigh, his nails digging in slightly causing you to whimper slightly — the whimper turning into a loud moan as his fingers begin thrusting into your pussy.

Seungmins lips briefly leave your throbbing bud, his lips ghosting it, his other finger presses in you, making you moan pitifully, begging for more, grinding down against his hand. feeling your soft walls flutter around his fingers.

"Squeezing my fingers so tight, baby? Fuck how you gonna react to my cock, huh pretty girl?" He coos, his breath lingering against her aching clit.

His teasing makes you whine, desperately grinding your hips up to try and meet his thrusts.

Seungmin's fingers scissor in you, stretching you out. His fingers fasten, thrusting at a pace that pulls a string of moans from you. The room echoing between your incoherent moans and he squelching sound of Seungmin's fingers in you.

It's all too much, his gaze shifts between you and your pussy, watching as your hole sucks in his fingers, watching the juices gush out of your cunt.

His hold on your thigh tightens as your legs start to shake, your cunt sucking him in as you feel your orgasm approach.

He's just as desperate as you to reach your peak — his tongue flicking at your clit, sucking at the throbbing bud, moaning around it.

Your brain feels like mush, hopelessly grinding into his hand, the new angel causing his fingers to brush against that gummy spot on your walls, pulling you into pure ecstasy, your orgasm crashing over you dramatically.

He doesn't stop, captivated by you. Watching your cunt, watching as you cum around his fingers, shaking under him.

His thrusting doesn't stop, it slows, helping you ride out your orgasm.

When your orgasm slows you expect him to pull away — which he does. Seungmin retracts his fingers, watching as they pull out, covered in your cum.

Then he quickly replaces his fingers with his tongue.

The immediate overstimulation causes you to try and escape trying to pull away from his mouth, his nails digging into your thigh, stopping you from trying to escape his touch.

He starts lapping up your cum — tongue dragging all over your pussy, sucking up all you have to offer. Tongue circling your hole before trusting in.

Your fingers pull on his hair, nails scratching into his scalp — you don't know if you're trying to push him off or pull him closer. Your high pitched moans bouncing off the walls — sure your neighbours will probably complain tomorrow but god — you don't care.

Seungmin's in no better shape, his cock which was already half hard before this — rubbing against the fabric of his jeans, the pleasure — the taste of you making him moan, unable to stop himself.

Seungmin's mindlessly grinding into your sheets — chasing his own pleasure as well as yours.

You can see it — when you briefly open your teary eyes you see him mindlessly humping against the sheets, you whimper — at the fact hes enjoying this just as much as you.

You can feel another orgasm in your gut — your stomach twisting in pleasure — Seungmin's devoted to destroying you in the best way possible, tears forming on your lash line threatening to fall — the overstimulating pushing you over the edge.

Mindlessly bucking to meet his tongue. He's moaning into your pussy — devouring you, tasting all of you, addicted to you.

His focus shifts to your neglected clit, tongue sucking on it as you ride out your orgasm.

Tears run down your cheeks, sniffles fill the room. Unlike last time he does push you past your limit. Once you start settling he pulled away from your cunt. The lower half of his face covered in your juices — cheeks flushed, pupils dark and blown out.

His hairs a mess, from your endless carding and tugging through it.

He rests his head on your thigh, his fingers mindlessly tracing shapes onto your opposite thigh, looking at you like you're perfection — which in his eyes, you are.

"You alright?" He asks, only slightly concerned — more prideful, which you can tell from the faint smirk on his lips.

You hum slightly in agreement. He lifts his head from your thigh, sitting between your legs. Seungmin grabs your hands, pulling you up onto his lap, allowing him to move you where ever he wants, your body feeling fuzzy and like jelly.

Seungmin's arms circle your waist, holding you against him, your arms wrap around his neck, playing with his hair gently.

His face is mere inches from yours, his gaze softening as he looks at you. Capturing your lips in a soft kiss, you can faintly taste yourself on his tongue, pulling a sound from you which he quickly swallows.

you moan softly into the kiss, just enjoying the presence of him again, missing even just his lips against yours.

Seungmin's hands work to slowly pull of your shirt, tapping at your waist telling you to put your arms up, which you do.

Once your shirts removed he just stares, not in a way you feel judged — but loved.

His hands splay on your back pressing his lips back onto yours in a heated kiss, pouring all his love into it. Seungmin's fingers fiddle with the clasps of your bras, trying to undo it while also maintaining the kiss.

After several failed attempts you cant help but laugh into the kiss, causing him to laugh. As the kiss breaths you look into his eyes holding back laughter.

Seungmin lets out an exasperated laugh, pressing his forehead to yours, his nose nudging against yours. His fingers finally manage to undo the clasps, letting the bra fall from your chest. You let it fall onto the bed, not paying close mind to it.

Seungmin's gaze never leaves you, his expression is something reserved, not for STAYS, not even the boys — just you.

He shifts you out of his lap, laying you down back against the pillows, your hair fanning around you head, looking like an angel to him.

Seungmin hovers over you, removing his own shirt throwing it mindlessly on the ground. You shift up helping him unbuckle his belt, with a slight hum from him. When the belts undone he quickly pulls down his jeans and boxers, landing somewhere at the end of the bed, now straddling over you.

Seungmin's eyes never leave yours for long, only to look at the rest of you — utterly captivated by you.

"Missed you — missed this.." Your voice is a whisper, quiet to not break the careful bubble your in.

You're not talking about the sex — well yes you missed the sex, but you're just talking about him, how he grounds you, how you don't notice how much you revolve around each other till one of you isn't there.

He leans down, his hand sliding into yours on the sheets, holding you there, not forcefully but enough to feel like he isn't going anywhere.

Your legs wrap around his waist, your free hand holding onto his neck pulling you closer to him. Your foreheads touching, squeezing his hand.

Seungmin reaches for his cock — giving himself, running his hand down his cock a few times before lining up with your entrance, a small gasp leaves your lips at the feeling, the anticipation.

When Seungmin finally pushes in, its not fireworks, its not rough, its passionate.

In the way you feel like home.

The familiar way your walls pulse against him, the moans you let slip that he'll want to hear till the day he dies.

The room fills with both of your breathing, you can feel his breath on your lips.

He stays stilled for a moment, savouring the feeling of you after months of being away, allowing you to adjust to him after time apart.

When you buck your hips against his pulling a moan from both of you he starts moving, he starts off slow, his trusts deep, letting you feel all of him.

Your hand squeezes his — the feeling of him finally back to you is another layer of pleasure, not sure if you ever want him to leave again.

His trusts grow faster, his hand hosting your legs further up on his waist, leaning down to attach his lips into yours.

The pleasure of his sharp thrusts in you, his tip grazing your g-spot its too much — plus the oversensitivity from your previous orgasms, you can feel yourself getting embarrassingly close already.

it seems the sentiment is joint — from his thrusts growing deeper and sloppier from his whines escaping his lips into the kiss, he pulls back.

"Fuck — squeezing me so perfect, not gonna last, angel." His voice breaks, his grip on your hand tightening as you clench around him at his words.

You let out a pathetic moan in response — not trust your voice to not break.

Seungmin keeps on talking — feeling his orgasm get closer, feeling yours too from how your tightening around him.

"Never gonna leave you again hm? all yours, baby" His rambling is barely processing through your blissed out mind.

Leaning forward , pushing impossibly deeper hitting a spot that makes you both moan.

The new angle makes it impossible for you — you're shaking under him, mumbling his name and other incoherent words he cant register.

"Gonna fill you up nice hm? never would have to leave you then." He coos breathlessly.

Your orgasm triggers his, his thrust growing fast and sloppy till they stop, leaking into your cunt.

As you both ride out your orgasm its breathless and wordless. Seungmin's hold on you not loosening, as if you'll fade away if he does.

His nose bumps into yours, both of your foreheads sweaty but you cant seem to care, resting his on yours. His hand only leaves yours to brush some hair from your face, knuckles tracing the skin of your jaw.

"Never letting you leave again.." You mutter out, your voice breaks slightly causing him to hum in amusement smiling slightly.

"I probably cant with how tight your gripping me." He tease causing you to smack his arm softly, no real malice behind it.

"We need to clean up, come on." You say, trying to shove him off you which results in him fully laying down you — knocking the air out of you. You don't say anything, your arms wrapping around his shoulders, carding through his hair.

"Need to stay a little longer.." He mumbles into the skin of your shoulder.

"Seung seriously.." No real bite behind it, making no effort to move.

"And I'm serious, gonna stay with you forever." His fingers playing with strands of your hair.

"Don't think you can do that, Minnie." You hum slightly, enjoying just being with him.

He doesn't fully acknowledge your words, simply staying there with you, enjoying just being with you after months apart.