many a burden

LUPELLIS ( a mix of lupellus and lupelli, meaning wolf cub(s) )—— an independent and selective denzel from the compilation of final fantasy vii. written by prince ( he/they, 25+). formerly denzeru.

                                                           we’ll wait for you!

this blog is a study in FAMILY, DESTINY, SELF-SUFFICIENCY, MORTALITY, LIFE, and HOPE.

several years after the duchy of rosaria became the imperial province of rosaria, denzel was born into one of the province's smaller villages. his test proved that he was a bearer, but his parents remembered a time where bearers in their region were treated much kinder than they were, and so they kept his power a secret.

denzel spent several years growing up in relative normalcy. he was a bright child who learned quickly, and kept any displays of his power to within their small house. fire came the most easily to him, but he did his best to use the other elements to make his family's life easier when he could.

all was well until sanbreque soldiers descended upon their village for no other reason than to have someone to bully, it seemed. when his family and friends were threatened, he stepped up to defend them, but the outcome was not what he wanted.

most of his village, including his parents, were killed, and denzel was to be taken to be branded.

luckily, they underestimated him, leaving him unattended and drinking far too much in their celebration. denzel was able to escape, beginning a trek through rosaria in a search for safety. near martha's rest, he ran into another group of displaced children–––– a group that took on jobs, sometimes dangerous ones, to ensure they could all be clothed and fed. upon learning of his fate, and unaware that he was a bearer, they extended an invitation for him. and, with little other choice, denzel accepted.

and with them he stayed, until he took a risk and his truth was discovered in front of a man with a scar on his cheek and a wolf at his side. a man who promised denzel that he could be taken somewhere safe, with others like him.

it was an easy choice to make.

___

notes:

after denzel is brought to the hideaway, he is often found near blackthorne or harpocrates. he's a kid that likes quiet sometimes, but also doesn't like to necessarily feel. alone. so sitting with blackthorne, who doesn't expect him to talk but is also cool to be around, is relaxing. he is also an avid reader, and the large room with various books on every topic imaginable along with someone who will answer his every question about new words, places, and things, is one of the best places he can find himself.

due to his time spent with harpocrates, and the loresman's fondness for kupo nuts, denzel spoiling his dinner is a somewhat regular occurrence

(  soft caring sentence compilation | @legacyheld​ )

❛❛ You look like you need a hug. Come here. ❜❜

     there was a moment of hesitation on denzel's end. his eyes moved over the smile on zack's face & his open arms, as if searching for any sign that the offer wasn't genuine. he found none & yet, he continued to wait —— as if expecting him to give up on the prospect if he stood there long enough. but zack was patient ( or, maybe, stubborn was a better word for him ) & his ability to wait for denzel's decision was outlasting denzel's ability to wait for zack to give up.

denzel knew, on some level, that their rivalry was playful. something that made little denzel with his wooden swords feel like he could win against a powerful soldier. but, that didn't change the fact that he didn't want to look weak.

he wanted to be strong. he wanted to be brave. he didn't want to give into what he felt was a childish temptation. but, he wanted to be hugged & held. he wanted so desperately to feel cared about, & here was zack, kneeling closer to his height & offering it altogether in a single instant.

it was too much for denzel to resist.

with little warning, he was running forward, colliding with zack in a force so strong that, were he anyone else, it may have knocked them over. he wrapped his arm around him, little hands gripping tightly onto any part of him that denzel could get into his grasp. the breath he let out was long & shaking—— & more than a little tired. his head tilted so he could rest his cheek on zack's shoulder. denzel shut his eyes tightly, but even just a few moments in his hold had the boy relaxing with a long sigh.

      ❛ thanks, zack. ❜  

the hug showed no signs of ending, & yet denzel couldn't help but hold on a little tighter. mumbling low as if zack wouldn't be able to hear him.

(   soft caring sentence compilation | @rosfielde​​ )

❝  you’re with me now.  ❞

     he couldn’t remember the last time he was so comfortable —— maybe some time before the attack, the last time he was tucked into a cozy bed & felt his mother kiss his forehead, but those memories were beginning to get fuzzy —— but he was sure none of them quite compared, if only for the amount of time it had been since he’d last felt so relaxed.

     the dinner he’d been given had been enough to fill his belly ( more than enough, he’d snuck some of his leftovers to torgal ). his clothes were enough to keep him warm. the company he kept was kind & fun, even if some of the stuff they spoke about went over his head. torgal’s head rested gently in his lap &, between the warm wolf & the dancing fire in front of them, denzel was fairly certain he wasn’t going to be awake for much longer.

      ❛ i didn’t think i’d ever get out of there. ❜  

     his voice was low & quiet, as if he was just speaking to himself. but, he knew that clive, seated next to him, could hear every word. he knew he was lucky. some people really never did get out, but he was small enough to slip out unnoticed, & lucky enough to run into clive.

     one hand reached up to scratch torgal behind the ears, but his eyes never left the fire.

     ❛ & if i did, i didn’t think it would be...good. ❜  

     he’d had nightmares about being sent off somewhere he didn’t know anything about. he’d heard so many stories —— very few of them positive. they had all made it sound like it was inevitable, & it had filled him with fear.

     the panic he felt at the reminder of such a dreadful fate must have shown on his face, because clive chose that moment to speak up.

     you’re with me now.

     it was the certainty in his tone that made denzel turn his head, his gaze resting on clive. the mere reminder was enough to relax him, & he settled easily.

      ❛ yeah, i’m with you now. ❜  

     for a moment, that was the end of it. until denzel let himself lean over, resting himself against clive’s arm. torgal huffed in protest at the movement, but relaxed as soon as denzel was still again.

     now, he crept up the stairs with the tray of pancakes, juice, a single flower in a mug & his homemade card as cautiously as possible——   he’d been so careful making the food that he wasn’t going to let a trip on the steps ruin all of his hard work. finally, he reached the top of the stairs, making his way to tifa’s room.

    ❛ tifa!  ❜  

     he moved a little too fast in his excitement, & the tray almost slipped from his hands. he leaned slightly to right it, all but holding his breath as everything tilted, & didn’t start to breathe again until it settled & he continued to make his way over, setting the tray down at her lap with a grin that beamed with pride.

     ❛ happy birthday! i made you breakfast! & a card, too!  ❜  

     if anyone had accused him of looking shy, he would have denied it, but there was no hiding it in the moment. he watched her closely, eyes a little wide & head tilted in curiosity.

     ❛ do you...do you like it?  ❜  

     ❛ rix says you’re a summoner.  ❜  

     he stumbled over the word a little, proof that he didn’t know much about what it meant. but rix had said it like it was something cool & amazing, & that she in turn was cool & amazing. he’d left denzel without an explanation, & so he wanted to try to get his information from the source.

     though, admittedly, his first though wasn’t about trying to figure out what a summoner was. he knew, whatever it was, it must have been a difficult thing to be—— if it wasn’t, more people would be one, & he would have heard the word before. but, he couldn’t quite understand the reasoning behind someone choosing to do something so hard. & so he had a question a bit more pressing than finding out just exactly what a summoner even was.

     ❛ why? ❜  

     though the bustle of all the visitors had been fun, denzel enjoyed the quiet. he sat at one of the bar’s high stools, feet swinging & chin in his hands as he watched tifa prepare for the evening at the bar. he didn’t say much, choosing instead to watch as he turned his thoughts over in his head.

     he had a question. a question that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to ask. on one hand, asking might make her upset, & that was the last thing he wanted. he’d enjoyed seeing the smile on her face with all her friends around, & he didn’t want to remind her that she might have been upset. but, on the other hand, he didn’t know when he would next get a chance to ask. it wasn’t something that he wanted to talk about with marlene around, & definitely not when he was anywhere within earshot of cloud. he let out a little sigh, straightening himself up to finally ask.

      ❛ hey, tifa? ❜  

     once her eyes were on him, he ducked his head a little, trying to figure out how to ask his question without sounding upset.

     ❛ are you mad at cloud? for leaving? ❜