The warlock had been dealing with his life and all of the other people that were disrupting it, because apparently it was easier to pull his life apart than it was to even speak to the shadowhunter. Apparently Magnus had come across as warm and fluffy where as Alec had come across as the grump version in their relationship so they believe it was going to be the warlock who would fix their relationship because time and time again that had been what he always did. The shadowhunter had gotten too used to the warlock always stepping in and taking the heat whenever something happened that the warlock even wondered if he noticed it sometimes. It sure as hell didn’t seem like it anymore and it sure as hell acted as if he expected the warlock to continue to do so.
Well he was going to get himself into a big surprise because the warlock was done with it. He had done his fair share of fixing and he had been the shoulder to cry on one too many times without having the same thing done in response, after all the warlock had to live with the fact that he didn’t get the same in return. So for once he didn’t stand up and be the guy that fixed everything, for once he wanted to be the one that someone tried to fix which was why no matter what happened between the two of them, Magnus wasn’t going to be the one that fixed it. He wasn’t going to be the one that sorted any of the problems. He was going to sit back and let this one run out, although he was definitely upset and angry about the fully situation.
“Because of course that would be great for business to just have some spells on my apartment that stopped vampires and warlocks for entering. You really have not thought anything through have you”
Magnus couldn’t help but reply in a sarcastic manner because of course he had already wanted to put some spells on his apartments and of course he would have loved to keep all the Nephilim out of his home but that wasn’t exactly his first thought. He had wanted to be with the shadowhunter and just like everyone else in his relationship he had been left in the dark. He had been the one to be heart broken because of someone else.
This was how it always seemed to end up for the warlock and he was tired of it, he wanted to be alone from now on and he believed he had had enough of all this nonsense with people. Magnus couldn’t think about anyone else now or in the future, he would problem retire himself to where Tessa was and see if it helped as much as she said it did. But right now he couldn’t do that because as much as he hated the shadowhunter right now, he also still loved him – and didn’t want to see anything happen to him which was why he couldn’t just disappear while he was still alive and needing help. That would defeat the purpose but it also meant getting caught in situations like this which he would have rather avoided since the more time he seemed to spend with the hurt raven haired male the more time he seemed to want to leave completely and be with no one in his life.
“That’s not quiet how life works for us immortals and that’s something you don’t understand. Why do you think my friend Tessa or any of the other warlock’s end up working in the Labyrinth? There is a point in every warlock’s life when eventually they give up and they’ve had enough of falling in love”
Magnus had had enough of letting the shadowhunter tell him how he would live his life and how he would fall in love with someone else. Magnus had wanted to scream and shout and throw a tantrum because well he was fed up of the Lightwood using his immortality against him, if this was the way he was going to be then it was obvious that they would never be able to be together because why would this warlock even want to be in a relationship with someone like this.
The cat eyed warlock was at his wits end with the Lightwood and whatever insecurities he had, even if he apologised and wanted to get back together, Magnus wasn’t sure he could so easily go back to how they used to be. They had said so much to each other and Alexander had seemed to be adamant that Magnus was going to live his life in a certain way even if Magnus said he didn’t want to do that. It was like the blue eyed male wasn’t even listening to him or what he had to say and that, frankly, made him not want to be in a relationship with someone like that. Magnus needed someone who would actually pay attention to him and give him the love he had craved so much in his life. Alec seemed to be doing the exact opposite of what he needed him to do and that was pushing the warlock further and further away without any look before coming back.
He wasn’t sure how much the shadowhunter was aware of this but he had to have some idea about what was happening since the warlock felt horrible and he was sure he looked nearly as bad since that wasn’t his usual look. Magnus was down on the ground, with his legs stretched out and collapsed to the side, he couldn’t even look at the Nephilim because he was so upset and disappointed with him by this point.
“You have decided in you’re head what will happen when you’re gone. What’s to say you won’t be the last person I love. What’s to say that we couldn’t have a long and happy life together. The only person that is standing in that way is you, Alexander”
Magnus was fed up with the shadowhunter deciding his future for him. After all they could have had a good life together considering what Magnus had dealt with him so far, they had quiet easily fallen in to a nice little routine. They had enjoyed their short time together and felt comfortable just spending time together and Magnus hadn’t even minded when he had to help out the misfit family of his whenever they had gotten themselves into trouble. But that had all ended far too soon because the Lightwood’s head had gotten the better of him. He had seen the memory box Magnus had collected of his life and he couldn’t get passed the fact that not only was he not in there but he might be in there one day. He couldn’t believe his immortal life was coming back to bite him in the ass the way it was.
But that wasn’t something he could change. Which was why he had to let the Blue eyed Nephilim understand that, he couldn’t change that small thing about himself, it was a part of him and that was why they weren’t together anymore. Alexander had to get over his own insecurities and move on if that was what he wanted to do. But blaming everyone else for his own problems was something he was going to have to get over. Just because he was nervous and it was his first time didn’t mean he could just blame Magnus for their full relationship. That wasn’t what relationships were about, and the sooner the Lightwood would understand what they were going to be like in the future. It was hard for Magnus to explain all the problems and what had gone wrong because to him it felt like they were a perfect match. It felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest.
So Magnus felt like he had a right to be in his own mood for once, he felt like he had the right to voice his own opinion on the matter.
“You can’t just lock yourself away. I did it for so many years and every time I get into a relationship I think it will be different. I believe people will not just see me as a short time thing. No one ever wants me to spend any length of time with me”
The warlock was depressed about this fact and it was why he hadn’t been in a relationship for a long while. Not since the vampire, after all he believed that maybe he was supposed to be alone in life, maybe falling in and out of life wasn’t for him anymore, perhaps he was just supposed to be a magical warlock who dedicated his time to working. After all he hadn’t seen his friends in as many relationships as him. Tessa only had eyes for two men and he doubt she would date anyone apart from those two men. Catarina tended to spend all her time dedicated to nursing and looking after people and well Ragnor was just a grumpy green men with small versions of his own love stories. But no one quiet did romance and love like the cat eyed warlock did.
He had normally always believed that there would be something else. Someone would love him the way he was supposed to be loved, yet here he was again, alone and rejected because of who he was born to be. He didn’t even get to choose the parts of himself that people seemed to hate. He was born with immortality, he was born with these eyes, he was born a warlock and none of that was his choice but still he suffered the consequences of it.
Magnus knew that it was difficult for Alec and he knew that it was new to all of him that was why he had wanted to take it slow and he had tried not to fallen in love with him as fast as he did. But that didn’t work out in the warlock’s favour either. Magnus hadn’t expected to have so many firsts with the younger shadowhunter either, after all Magus was an immortal and that meant it was hard to be his first when he had lived so long. It was completely new for him to be dealing with so many first but Alexander was his first shadowhunter and he couldn’t help but help him whenever he could. Which was why he ended up locked in a box with him right now.
But Magnus didn’t really know what Alec wanted him to say or which of the questions he wanted him to answer since he seemed to be spouting off questions in random bursts. He was worried about the Lightwood and everything he was saying and doing, but at the same time Magnus had to take care of himself because he knew he was going to be living like this for years to come. The shadowhunters could distract themselves in life with all the work they did and all the hunting they were doing and the same could be said for Magnus. He could distract himself with work but that was hard when everything in work reminded him of the shadowhunter that made things difficult. After all his work had pushed him to Alec and the shadowhunters seemed to be most of his work lately.
“It’s not like we get a choice of who we fall for Alec. You were a first of mine for many things as well. I didn’t think Immortality would ever be a problem because it’s part of who I am and I can’t separate from myself. Which is why after everything I didn’t push for anything after you ended things, it’s why I stayed away because you’re the one that can’t get over that insecurity in your own head, no matter what I say or do I can’t make myself mortal”
Magnus decided to level with Alexander after all he had to tell him the truth in these situations. After all he couldn’t baby the Lightwood right now especially when It was his first relationship. If he wanted to get over it and move on – as much as Magnus would hate to see him move on – he needed to learn what it was like in real relationships if he ever wanted to get into another one. The cat eyed warlock would hate to see him in another relationship and he wasn’t sure he could just sit by and watch, he would probably end up leaving the country if that were the situation but they weren’t at the stage just yet.
He was thankfully for that situation.
At the tossed vile on the floor, Magnus couldn’t help but stare at it for a moment after all he had thought about using it multiple times it would easily help him forget who he was and what he had been hurt about but that could also mean he could make the same mistake again and that wasn’t something he could muster, which was why he shook his head and closed his eyes. This situation seemed impossible to deal with at the best of times but locked in a room with the Lightwood just made this even worse.
“I couldn’t forget you Alec. That’s why I gave you the potion”
He admitted even if he didn’t want to open his eyes and see the look on the blue-eyed males face, most of the time he had such a strong fierce persona and that was part of what Magnus loved about him but he also knew what the shadowhunter looked like hurt and broken, he also knew what it was like when he cared deeply for someone that he would do anything to help them and that was why he couldn’t just sit here and face him. That was why he was sitting as far away from the male as he could get and he tried not to look over and see his beautiful face and the combination that always made Magnus fall in love. Those dark raven locks and blue eyes. How could Magnus resist such temptation wrapped up in his favourite combination.
Magnus knew better than anyone else that he couldn’t forget the Lightwood male after all since their break up he had been trying to forget everything they had and failing terrible. Although it didn’t help that he had every other shadowhunter breaking down his door and demanding him to talk to Alec and get him to change his mind. The blue eyed shadowhunter had his own damn mind and he had to make his own decision and in this instances, Magnus refused to be the one to fix everything, he was always the one to step in and protect the blue eyed Nephilim, he always made sure he was happy and not emotional about things and he was someone the man could lean on when no one else could. But Magnus couldn’t continue to do this when he also got the backlash.
Alec needed to realise that he had to take Magnus as who he was, he had to be the same to Magnus as Magnus was to him and that wouldn’t be the case if this continued. Alec needed to get over himself and step up for once because for once Magnus wasn’t going to apologise and make everything right again. The elder Lightwood had to do that for himself for once, yes he wasn’t good at talking about his feelings or coming to people for help but in order to win Magnus back or even to be friends again well that was just what he was going to have to do. Magnus couldn’t stop his feelings for the Lightwood male and they wouldn’t go away over night.
But he also couldn’t keep getting pulled into this fight and position every time something went wrong. He had to be able to live his life happy and not in fear that eventually the Lightwood would go off the deep end again and decide that he wanted to brood again. So this time, Magnus couldn’t fix what the Lightwood had broke.
“Alec you can’t just say these things and expect everything to go on the way it normally does. You’re the one that decided we can’t be together not me. I have to live with that knowledge myself. I’m stuck in this just as much as you are. Do you think I can just go back to my normal life? Go back to doing things I used to do without you”
Doing things without Alec and his friends would have been easier if people didn’t just turn back up in his apartment and demanding he fixed what he broke or the fact that they were the only shadowhunters in New York that seemed to deal with any of the problems and well he knew everyone in New York more than any other country it seemed. He had a life here and people he cared about so he didn’t see why he should have to leave just so the shadowhunter that broke his heart could be happy. After all he was going to have to watch that Shadowhunter get married and more than likely have children of his own, and then forever the Lightwood name would be tainted for him.
How was he supposed to look at any Lightwood’s the same ever again in his long life?
How could Magnus explain to Alexander what break ups were like? It was hard to explain to him about his other relationships, since he always seemed to get upset or angry when they mentioned Magnus’s passed relationships. But they weren’t together anymore and he wasn’t supposed to be saving his feelings. Magnus wasn’t supposed to care about him in any way shape or form but that obviously wasn’t the case. Magnus didn’t want to even look at the blue eyed male either but he couldn’t think properly about what was happening or what it was supposed to feel like.
Yes, Magnus had been hurt after a break up but he couldn’t remember it ever been this hard to move on. He had normally drank himself silly with Catarina and Ragnor near by and then they had all moved on to the next country they could. He never forgot the people he had been in love with but at the same time he had never been stuck in this kind of battle with them either. But then again none of them with Alexander Lightwood and that was maybe a part of why it was so busy.
“I’ve never been in a break up quiet like this before”
Magnus couldn’t help but admit with a small voice because well they hadn’t really stopped their fighting with each other yet and he couldn’t quiet decide if he wanted to escape the situation or the word entirely at this point. His friends and his family had put him in this situation and no one seemed to be helping him in any way shape or form. It was very frustrating for him to be put in this position since of course it wasn’t his idea to break up with the Lightwood, just like it was very rarely his idea to break up with most of the people he was with. He was beginning to get depressed just thinking about it. After all it seemed Magnus was good for people if only for them to experience a small part of his life, he was never a long term thing for everyone so why should that change for the Nephilim who tended to have shorter life than most people.
That was probably why he had stayed so long with the vampire, she had seemed to want him and she also had an immortal life, even though she wasn’t very much Magnus’s type but that was what he had learned after the case.
The sarcastic tone of voice was easily recognizable at this point to the nephilim male seeing as how this seemed to be the way the two men chose to spoke to each other now - sarcastic words with a bitter distain to them. There were many people in this world who used sarcasm as a defence mechanism to keep others at bay and not allow them to chip away at any walls that had been built up. But depending on that person and the situation, it was also something heartbreakingly deadly. It was frankly very easy to speak things sarcastically and mean what was being said. But it was the way it was being said which left more of an impact with people that resonated with them. There was always a truth so much more easily spoken rather then just speaking normally. Yet that’s what got people in trouble. That’s what left people fighting harder to rekindle something broken because the sarcastic tone of voice left more of a hurtful impact.
While both Alec and Magnus could be sarcastic individuals at the best of times; even to each other, it was very different right now in this moment. It wasn’t coming from a place of playfulness and teasing each other, but rather a place of hurt. Alec could be the first one to admit he didn’t know what the actual hell he was doing in trying to cope with this break up. But he just knew he didn’t want to hurt anymore. He didn’t want to feel the broken parts of him without Magnus. Things were so much easier and simpler without the warlock in his life. The Lightwood felt as if his world had been turned upside down and had done a complete 180 when he met Magnus Bane. And there was no going back after that. Alec knew what he was giving up in breaking up with the warlock after experiencing those early moments of blissful happiness and love. But he was a realist. That was how the shadow hunter was brought up. There weren’t shades of grey in this world, everything was black and white. The relationship the two men had together was wrong and frowned upon on so many levels and breaking so many rules. But they didn’t care at the time. Not until Alec got his head out of the clouds and realized just what exactly was going on his life. It was just easier to convince himself multiple times that he would have save himself a lot of hurt and uncertainty if the relationship just ended now rather then later down the line when one day Alec might not have even come back after a job. It was entirely possible for a shadow hunter after all.
“I’m sure you could find a loophole in any spell. That is something your species is rather good at, just like the fae.”
Alec indicated. He had seen the warlock first had find a loophole in a spell or two so it wouldn’t be anything new for him. Warlocks could be tricky individuals, just like those fae. The difference was, Magnus was the high warlock and had a little bit more power and knowledge. If he put his mind to it, Alec was more then certain he could execute the plan. He was just choosing not to. Perhaps despite what he was saying, he actually enjoyed people bursting through the doors of his apartment unannounced and giving him a lecture of some sort. It was entirely possible. The only ones he would probably be more kind to in shooing away were Clary and Isabelle. Aside from being female, Magnus helped raise Clary in a way. He had been around her since she was a young girl and a grown up nephilim now. And then there was his sister Isabelle. She just enjoyed her brother and the warlock finally coming together and seeing how they both shined as bright as the sun and illuminated as bright as the moon that she didn’t want to see them part ways. Alec didn’t know exactly how many times those girls had ambushed the warlock, but he really didn’t care. He didn’t care who harassed Magnus with lectures because Alec was getting the same thing and getting equally, if not more, fed up. The shadow hunter had a shorter fuse then usual these days and it was never something should be tested. Alec didn’t care if it was his parabatai or his sister, he didn’t want to here any lectures from either one of them or Magnus’s children dropping by and making their opinions known. He was trying to run the New York Institute, despite people sticking their noses in places where it shouldn‘t be. He couldn’t focus on the feelings of his ex boyfriend by any means.
“If that’s the case, then I guess you’ll be working in the Labyrinth whenever that time comes. It’s not like we study the way of your kind in detail. All we need to know are the basics.”
He answered back. He could speculate all he wanted what Magnus’s immortal life was going to be like without Alec in it anymore, but it’s not like the outcome ever made him feel better. Whether he was in the Labyrinth or not because he didn’t want to love anymore wasn’t something Alec should be concerned with.
“That’s all just a fantasy Magnus. You’re not being realistic about this relationship. Shadowhunters and warlocks can’t live a long and happy life, it just doesn’t work. But I know I won’t be the last person you love since there seems to be all sorts of things wrong with me according to you. Your little memory box proves as much that you’re pretty capable of moving on to someone else over time.”
The nephilim argued back, clearly not satisfied with what Magnus had to say in response. The outcome Alec had decided in his head was one that he was nearly certain would come to pass. It was just the facts that had been presented to him that led him to that belief. He could in a couple years, months, weeks, days, tomorrow - and that would be that. Magnus couldn’t die as an immortal. Alec’s life was a game of Russian Roulette that left an unpredictable outcomes. There was no such thing as a shadow hunter living a long and happy life. They were lucky if they got to even have one of those things with someone, but getting both wasn’t something common. Especially when half the time it resulted in an arranged marriage which is what Alec almost had to Lydia before turning into a runaway groom and going into the arms of a man he began to care more deeply for then anyone else. Back then Alec had followed his heart. But this time he was following his mind. The heart was a funny thing - and much more complicated. His mind was more rationalized and tactical since this is the way he was brought up. Alec leaned into what he knew. He just had to crawl out from that unknown territory he found himself in with Magnus Bane, although it was much easier said then done after having tasted that kind of forbidden fruit.
As much as Alec would have relished in knowing he could be the last person Magnus would ever open his heart to, it wasn’t something he chose to believe. The selfish part of him wanted that though - to be Magnus’s one and only. But the part that cared for the magical warlock still wanted him to find someone who could love him enough that wouldn’t do what Alec was doing right now - breaking their hearts. He wanted Magnus to find someone to spend his immortal life with and be happy; as much as Alec’s behavior and words said otherwise. The nephilim wanted the best for his ex boyfriend even if it made the Lightwood miserable in the end - not that he wasn’t already miserable enough already. But it was easier knowing that Magnus would just move on and find someone else because the nephilim wasn’t good enough for him.
“Except the difference between you and me when it comes to relationships is that I don’t have the time or energy to put myself through this again. I never thought of getting into a relationship with another person, nor did I want to. It was just a distraction from the mission. But you were unexpected in so many ways that I did begin to think of being you for the rest of my life.. I had it all thought out at one point.”
Alec let slip as he found himself reminiscing towards the end of his words in a more softer tone of voice as opposed to the more harsh one that seemed to come out full force whenever Magnus was around these days.
There was a certain reputation Magnus Bane had that Alec was very well aware of that would lead anyone to think that falling in love and wanting a nice long and happy life together was not in the agenda of the warlock. Anything short term seemed to be the more likely route to go down for him. Yet it was very much the opposite when Magnus fell in love with someone, it was like the rumors and stories that were led to be believed about him weren’t entirely true and there was more to the story that clearly only a few individuals knew about.
Only the ones that served to be in the warlock’s memory box knew who the real Magnus Bane was under all those stories. Alec felt like he did too, but they two of them were from two very different worlds that the future he wanted with the warlock and thought about whenever they woke up next to each other or holding hands in another country was something unattainable for him in the long run. A short life was all he could offer Magnus. He couldn’t offer a long and happy life with him because his future was so uncertain. And quite frankly, he could live knowing he could have a bad day with Magnus and then end up dead that day. Or even having a good day and end up dead the next. It wasn’t a game of chance he wanted to play with their hearts anymore. And coming across that memory box of the warlock’s just seemed to put things a little bit more into perspective as to the lives Magnus had lived on his own and with other people. There were more lives he could live after Alec Lightwood.
With the amount of questions that suddenly just spewed off the Lightwood’s tongue, he had no idea which one he wanted Magnus to answer first. He probably didn’t even give him enough time to digest it all before coming up with some answers. But the warlock seemingly always had an answer to everything which is what the nephilim was banking on. Yet the main issue the two males had and would forever have, was what they were - mortal and immortal. There was no future for two people like that. It wasn’t something Alec could simply get over and accept. He had tried that so many times whenever the thought of it suddenly made an appearance before it became something continuous. It was much too difficult to ignore by then that it was all the shadow hunter could think about half the time. This future he once thought he could have with Magnus just seemed to dwindle away further and further as the insecurities of them being together became more dominate.
There was much to appreciate with how patient the timeless warlock was with the shadow hunter who found himself coming into a new life. Magnus had the patience of a saint with Alec. The Lightwood was awkward, confused, insecure and nervous who was basically a virgin in every sense of the word when it came to being in a relationship and being a boyfriend that Magnus’s reputation and experiences was more the enough to be intimidating. But the stories didn’t line up with the way he was with Alec. Maybe it was just for show, but Alec knew it was genuine. He felt it. The love they shared between them was far from a lie or trick. Alec knew that what he got into with Magnus was fast and made his head spin with pretty little things. He quite literally fell head over heels in love with Magnus Bane; as the expression went. And he knew he fell hard and fast for this man - so much so that he ended up going to his little sister for advice about sex.
Sometimes it was funny to believe that Alec could be a first for Magnus in more then one thing, but he was. It was something he could recall Magnus expressing in never having dated a shadow hunter until now - and having sex with one. Honestly it was something that Alec would have thought wasn’t a first for the immortal, but yet it was. Just like it was for Alec. The two of them were each other’s firsts in many things that for their worlds to suddenly come crashing down was utterly heart wrenching and made the nephilim want to disappear into the dark abyss and never return back. Only because that was the easier route then being here - then feeling all this. He noticed Magnus still did not look at him which made him tense his chiselled jaw as he blue eyes bore down to the man sitting likewise on the floor across the room.
“In the beginning your immortality wasn’t an issue because I was never thinking of it. You had my trust quicker then anyone else did. That’s why I gave you my energy for what you did for Luke since you used too much of yours. I fell in love with you too hard and too fast that I wasn’t thinking about anything but us. I wasn’t thinking of the reality of what we are. But when I saw that box, things right there and then just seemed more clearer. You can’t be mortal and I can’t be mortal. So what kind of future could we even have?”
He went on to say in a more calmly matter. The tone of his voice wavered through different emotions as he spoke, as did his eyes. There was in a certain sincerity of care in the Lightwood and the way he looked at Magnus at this very moment - it was a man still in love with his other half, but it was short lived as his blue orbs flickered down to the shattered glass at the warlock’s words.
“And did you actually think I would used that cursed thing? I’d rather die in battle tomorrow then to have either one of us take that ridiculous potion.”
Alec answeredin frusteration. Magnus must have thought he would use it because why even make that cursed potion and then give it to Alec? Did Magnus have so little faith in the Lightwood that he would take the cowards way out? Because that was far from the person Alec Lightwood was. He was a brave, head strong and fierce person all around. Even in as much pain as he currently was, that was not something Alec was ever going to turn to and her certainly wouldn’t let Magnus either. Magnus helped shape Alec into this confident and strong willed person that he would find the will to be brave through this despite wanting to crumble into another world.
The raven haired nephilim had no idea of the words that were spewing off his tongue all of a sudden - he just knew he had no control over them as his eyes found focus on both the wall and ceiling. He didn’t know what kind of response he was going to get or what he was looking to have happen by saying all that. He didn’t expect to win Magnus back or anything of the sort, but he knew the other man would understand these feelings because from what his friends and family had been drilling into his head on repeat, Magnus knew exactly what Alec was feeling. These weren’t things he was used to feeling and he could say after experiencing this all first hand that he didn’t want to feel this way again and he simply wanted it all to go away. If he could run from it he would. Alec tried to steer clear of the warlock as much as possible, but it seemed impossible. Even in a busy city like New York, the two males still had the ability to cross paths. And for some reason, they could only acknowledge each other in a cold and non friendly manner.
At this point in time, being friends much less anything else would be a stretch. Maybe acquaintances? Whatever was one step above strangers they could be. But even that seemed like too much of a challenge with the history these two men shared.
Listening to Magnus’s words, Alec wasn’t even sure where to start. But he wished he could take back everything he just said and said something hateful instead since that seemed to be a lot easier when speaking to Magnus these days.
“It’s not like you fought very hard to change my mind about the matter, which shows me that you agree with my reasoning’s.”
He informed him. Magnus did not fight very hard to change Alec’s perspective on the matter when things became more heated between them. Finding that memory box was one thing, but the little vile that contained the memory potion was more of a game changer that had the Lightwood loosing it completely.
“You’re asking the wrong person about that. I‘ve tried to back to a life before you came in, but according to everyone else I‘m not succeeding.”
Alec mumbled. He was the last person Magnus should be asking about getting back to normal and living his life against without his boyfriend. The shadow hunter was no example of living a life after a break up. He buried himself in work more then usual and took more high risk missions without always completely looking at it rationally and just going in head first. There were probably a couple of times where he could have been seriously injured or died had it not been for whatever person who chose to be his partner and save his ass. Alec would curse under his breath about it.
But Alec also knew the way Magnus had been living which was very different from himself. Magnus surrounded himself with alcohol and parties and was pretty much living up to his reputation from what Alec had been hearing.
Had the nephilim not been paying attention, he might have missed what Magnus had said because his voice was so quite. Needless to say his words weren’t of any kind of solace. He didn’t know whether it was a good or bad thing but by the way things had escalated between the two of them - so much so that Magnus felt the need to make a potion to forget Alec Lightwood, he was going to go with the latter option.
The tension between them was still thick and uncomfortable that the nephilim wasn’t sure if he was ever going to be able to breath properly again whenever he was in a room with his ex boyfriend. But nevertheless, the answer Magnus gave wasn’t good enough for the shadow hunter.
“What’s that suppose to mean?”
He asked in a more level tone of voice as he slowly dropped his head to force himself to look at the mirror image of a broken man in front of him.