Hi! How are you? This is me.
Iām Brazilian and I grew up in a small town. Iām 26 years old, Iām finishing my bachelor in Public Administration and I also work as a civil servant. If you believe in astrology Iām Aquarian.
Ā It isnāt all about me. Iām gay. It seems not be important but it is important. For sure I got and I get some problems being gay. Everybody who is gay knows how adolescence hurts like hell when you are gay ā at least for the ones who was born in the 90ās years. Happily my adolescence is over, I came out and now Iām learning better how do deal with my sexuality.
To be a gay who came out is a continuous learning. When I came out I thought: āNow Iām going to have the time of my life!ā. My life got better because I didnāt need to pretender.
But this week I felt very bad about me being gay. I donāt care about me being gay to honest I like it and Iām very proud of who I am. This week I did listen some jokes in my job about me being gay twice and it drove down. The first joke was done by a woman, she told to a man that he is the only man in my sector, my colleagues censured her so the woman came to me asking for a hug. The second joke the same woman told that Iām a butterfly. What the hell?!!? Iām a man, I love my male body and I donāt wanna look as a woman. Iām not delicate and colorful as a butterfly.
Usually I can deal with homophobic Ā jokes. This time I got sad because for the first time I realize that Iām gay and Iāll have to listen hurting jokes for my lifetime and there is not I can do to change it, because Iām gay and this is me and I canāt take it off of me.
After this sad moment, I started to think how brave Iām of come out and live truly, I do prefer listen homophobic jokes instead of hide myself in the shadows. Iām not a criminal, I donāt do bad things to the others persons than I donāt need to feel shame of me! I have to put up my face and fight against this homophobic people and show them that they are wrong, so I can fall sleep in peace.
