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Wish I could capture every moment that surrounds me w sunshine and keep it safely in a box

why do they call it a broke horse, iv’e only witnessed one wild mustang being broke. I watched a man be very patient and gentle to earn her trust and she began to be trained w/out even knowing it, her curiosity and focus drove her to perform things he showed her. Then she’s allowing a saddle, then he gets on her back and he rides, it was raw beauty but i also wondered what her life was like before she was brought here, when she listened to no one and roamed the lands, it definitely made my eyes tear up. Breaking a horse sounds like she lost something but what I saw was her choosing to become unified as a horse and rider together to become a fierce powerful bond. Then I reflected upon when I lost my virginity.

racing thoughts-when I look into my very own future i cant like it’s blocked from me, i cant see past the moment im in this very second. No one really knows for sure what tomorrow’s day will bring bc every move we make can take us to a new path through this life, there’s endless opportunities, but i have been able to imagine what each choice will bring for my future but now it’s too much to think past this very second

something can devour you so deeply that it takes away everything you’ve ever known, sending it spiraling into an unpredictable force. the only thing that heals you is time to build courage to face it on your own terms. There’s no right or wrong during this, it’s you alone, surrounded by sky and land beginning to feel alive and breath in all that uniquely makes you an individual.

every time I begin again and this time it was easy and pure you call on me, you painted my heart black and blue just like you did my face, my neck, my wrists, my mouth. in my tears I prayed to fly far far away, I looked up at the stars, grasped the earth calling for help to make you leave. Everytime you pull me back it takes away a piece of my soul and sets in motion darkness, so i disconnect from reality embarrassed that I havnt the strength to say no…then you leave to be with someone who you haven’t destroyed yet and she knows what you did to me. I don’t want this to be who I am