we do

It is Easter today, and also the day of your very last departure. After today, we have 52 days until I fly down to Tucson, and move you-the love of my life-back to our home. 

I can't believe we have survived the last 6 months, but am so thankful we have. Without your constant support and positive attitude, my dream could not have happened. 

Let's spend the next 4 hours basking in Washington sun, gawking at majestic mountains, and eating homemade scones. 

I will love you forever,

Sean,

We have come a long ways from our starting 237 days, on October 1, 2012. I am grateful for what you have sacrificed in order for me to follow my career. It could not have been simple to tell your newly wed wife to move across the country for the next 8 months. Your support is unconditional, unselfish, and without it I would not be where I am right now. I do not know how I could possibly illustrate how much I appreciate you, but I will try every day for the rest of our lives. I promise that. Thank you for letting me spread my wings and fly. 

Love you forever,

Stephanie

I belong with you, 

You belong with me,

You know, we were chatting earlier this morning on gmail (let the record note the date of 2/16), and I told you one of the biggest compliments I could give you was that I genuinely know in my heart that being around you and with you has made me a better person. It is so true. 

I love being in your company. I love your outlook on life. I love you. 

Its the little things that matter, like the perspective you offered me today about my students. I was ranting that my students finish a book and want to move on too quickly: you didn't argue or tell me I was wrong. Quite the contrary; you listened, even agreed, but then offered a nugget of wisdom: "It seems like a good thing that your students are asking to read another book so soon."

I really struggled this week. I greatly struggled all day yesterday. I can honestly say the only thing that got me through the day was my conversations with you. They helped me to not only get through my day--but to find enjoyment out of my day. 

I am tearing up as I write this, and my tears are tears of gratefulness. I am so thankful to spend my time with you. 

As you put it: I am so glad to have you on my team. 

Love you forever, 

every movement, moment, breath and sigh, plunge of french press

brings me that much closer

quiet. cold.

no sounds really except my breathing.

steam escapes my tea at a rapid rate.

evaporating steam makes me realize my happiness evaporated,

some time ago, probably when you told me.

  after school today. My nose frozen with harsh,

stinging rain. grey cloud cover—a dreary Washington day—outside,

and inside me, as well. talking to

you on the phone helps, but it also makes it

that much worse.

  heater kicks on, rumbling-sound jarring me out

of my depression.

  the heat feels good. I even crack a smile.

as I check the weather—some locations nearby are reporting snow—I realize

this is bad. snow in Tucson bad.

  but just when there is no hope.

just when I know it won’t

get better. Mark Tibbideau, meteorologist for weather.com,

cheerfully announces Sunny, warm temperatures

on Saturday.

you are everywhere. 

you are my lukewarm cup of trader joes dark that I sip with a smile and heavy heart. 

you are the low grey-white layer of moisture, blocking out the sun temporarily to say hello. 

you are the brand new toilet paper roll on the bathroom counter. 

(you are also the brown cardboard guts of toilet paper passed, isolated and alone on the toilet paper dispenser). 

you are the quiche special of the day, smiling in the coffee shop window.

you are the familiar jingle-jangles of npr on a sunday morning. 

you are my sunday morning. 

you are my everything. 

you are everywhere.

I love you.

I have never been more concerned with lines.

One?

Two?

No, one.

No, no, no, definitely two.

I have also never thought so deeply about the emotional repercussions of whether I see one, or two.

And where do you draw the line in the visual debate of pink lines?

I was searching for you.