dreamtime🪽

This might make some people uncomfortable, and that’s okay. It’s not for them. But for me? My peace, purpose, and deepest joy come from one thing: being beneath the man I belong to.

Not figuratively. Literally. In our home, in our dynamic, in our life - he is above me. I am his. And I am less.

There. I said it.

Not “equal in different ways.” Not “partners with differing roles.” I am inferior to him in our chosen lifestyle. Willingly. Proudly. With full knowledge and full submission. I gave up my power, and in doing so, I found peace.

Modern culture tells women like me that we should fight to be on top. Or at the very least, to never be less than anyone. We’re supposed to demand equality, keep score, share every burden, lead just as much, assert constantly. And I tried that. I lived that life.

And I was miserable.

Because deep down, I didn’t want to fight for control. I didn’t want to lead. I didn’t want balance. I wanted hierarchy. I wanted to kneel. I wanted to serve. I wanted to surrender completely, not because I’m weak, but because my strength was never meant to be used to dominate—it was meant to be poured into devotion, obedience, care, and loyalty.

So I gave him everything. My choices. My voice. My body. My rules. My freedom.

And what I got in return was structure, safety, protection, purpose. A love that wraps around my soul like a blanket fresh out of the dryer. Warm. Complete. Anchored.

He is above me in every way that matters in our dynamic - his word outweighs mine, his comfort comes before mine, his judgment overrules mine, and his needs always outrank mine. My role is to serve. To obey. To please. Not as a performative thing, but as my actual identity. It’s who I am, every minute of the day.

And strangely, that kind of complete surrender brings freedom. Because I don’t have to be in charge. I don’t have to lead. I don’t have to split everything 50/50. I don’t have to carry the weight of the world alone. I get to kneel in my rightful place and just be. Small. Soft. Humble. His.

It’s not popular to say, and I don’t need it to be. This isn’t for the world to understand, it’s for me to live. And I live it joyfully.

This weekend one of my owners wanted to use me. I was told I wasn't allowed to pee a few hours before he arrived, and kinda expected to be allowed to empty my bladder as soon as he arrived. However, when he got here, it turned out differently.

I was naked, as expected, and he used my throat until he got really hard. While he had his cock down my throat he explained that I'd get to pee soon, but not before him. I'd only be allowed to go after begging for his piss first. I was so surprised and couldn't imagine I'd actually ask for such a thing.

He then bent me over and fucked my ass. He wasn't being gentle, no matter how much I begged and whined. His cock felt great, but my full bladder made it soooo uncomfortable and it felt like I was going to piss myself. I didn't want to pee without his permission so in the end I did beg for his piss. I was just so desperate to pee, I couldn't help it!

He had me begging until he came in me, made me get on my knees and showered me in his piss. Only then was I allowed to pee as well 🫣