T-minus who the fuck knows how many hours until Penny Beach Trip 2K26 cause you know her ass is gonna be up at the crack of dawn devil whispering about "I wanna go to da BEEEEEECH"
Pray for us
She literally vibrated herself to sleep. The goals for this year are as follows (mostly dictated to me by Penny)
1. Catch our own fish
2. Cook that fish
3. Eat that fish, preferably in a sandwhich
4. Find a treasure
5. Eat a coconut
6. Sand
7. Catch penny BEFORE she crashes any proposals this time(this is a mom and dad goal)
In fair North Carolina we lay our scene, tiny feet slap against the vinyl flooring as they race down the hall way at the ass crack of dawn, a small but powerful voice screeching "ITS BEACH DAY!!!"
Okay 2 donuts and a breakfast sandwhich later and NOW we're really on our way to the beach. We're bring Boomer this time as well which Penny Rose thinks is HILARIOUS. We've been in the car maybe 25 minutes and I've already been asked "What is Boomer up to?" Approximately 572 times
Questions answered thus far:
1. Why is frog? (Fog)
2. Why do mommy and daddy not control the frog?
3. Why is the weather different here then at the beach?
4. Why does it take so long to get to the beach?
5. Why can't penny drive to the beach?
6. Why can't we use fans to blow the frog away?
7. Why are Grampy and cozy not in the car with us to go to the beach?
8. Where is the beach?
9. Will it be sunny or froggy at the beach?
10. What was the noise?
Along with countless others. You could not imagine the google search tabs I have open right now. I am the Hank Green of this car.
I called Cool Ranch Doritos Gamer Fuel ONE TIME and now every time we step foot into a gas station Penny shouts "I NEED GAMER FUEL!"
It is not the warmest beach day, frankly it's a little cold. Has this stopped penny rose? Never- .5 seconds in and she's face down in the ocean screaming
Oop time for shells
Penny has created a new concoction
Grilled cheese sandwhich with strawberries and blueberries right on it. Right on the ding dang sandwich. She has attempted to get everyone to try it. Her father and I are the only ones who have been brave enough.
My husbands review: "I don't know if these are the best flavors but they are for sure the most flavors"
Penny, at the tippy top of her lungs
HEY MAMA LOOK THIS SHELL IS BLACK LIKE YOU!!!!
(The words she is looking for is goth but I got the picture)
Oh by the way we got Penny a Camp Snap so she's also documenting her own journey I can't wait to see the photos
We must feed the beastie again lest she become "a fussy monster" as she refers to herself
This bougie ass child , for dinner, Penny has tried:
Chipotle cream chicken (thumbs up)
Lobster bisque (ate most of the bowl)
Mahi Mahi ( liked this a lot)
Crab stuffed flounder ( asked for 2 more bites)
Chicken club (did not like, bacon too "gushy" in her words)
Bow tie Alfredo (acceptable, not her favorite)
Penny gave a bunch of flowers she picked to a random woman on the beach and then took her photo so that's how we're ending our day over here
She some how ended up in the bed ON TOP of me and then woke up at 6:30 AM - downed 2 bowls of cereal and half a bagel and sprinted into the ocean (with a very sleepy dad trailing behind her)
Her poor grandparents did not believe us until they saw her Naruto running town the beach as the sun rose
Tried to get on a strangers surf board and while the lady was very kind and going to teach her we did have to have a conversation about boundaries
Brought me a shell with a whole ass lil guy in it. A FRIEND she exclaims. We explain that we can't take friends from their homes, that would be like an alien plucking her from the earth. AN ADVENTURE! She counters, but understands that we must gently put him back in the sea in wist he came. "I'm sorry for the adventure friend" she says with a small kiss to the clam who is sent back to the ocean.
Penny made a friend at dinner. They're doing summersaults while we wait for our food.
Penny: what's that
Me: (not thinking, making a horrible mistake) kinda looks like sea grapes!
Penny ( immediately goes to eat said maybe sea grapes)
Me: Penny no you can't eat them
Penny: ... why? They're grapes
Me: (hot and exhausted) they came from the OCEAN!
Penny: .... fish come from the ocean and we eat them?
Me: Penny just put it down, I'll get you some Cheetos, deal?
Penny: alright fine deal.
Penny got to order her own bagel this morning. She chose a chocolate chip bagel with honey walnut cream cheese. She rates this a 11/10
The spoils
A collection of photos from Penny Rose herself for you!
Tried a scallop for dinner
"This tastes very good but is very gooshy so one bite is enough"
Pizza at 9:30 pm cause a tiny voice in the darkness said "my tummy is so empty again" 😂
6:00 AM, from the edge of the bed in the shadows
"The sun is coming up - so if you could just open your eyes we could start the day please?"
When we attempted the "don't move and maybe she won't notice us" tactic she crawled into the bed like something out of a horror movie and just stated louder " I SAID THE SUN IS COMING UP SO IF U COULD JUST OPEN YOUR EYES WE COULD START THE DAY PUH-LEASE!!"
Procured the goods
Anyone who sees a 4 year old in a hot pink and lime green bathing suit singing Kpop Demon Hunters AT the ocean while punching at it while her ghostly apparition of a mother stands at the shore line mind your business she's living her best life
Walked pasted like an oddities place and Penny yelled "MAMA THERES LIKE SO MANY SKELETONS IN THERE YOU GOTTA COME SEE THIS" which everyone thought was 10/10 hilarious. It is always very silly to hear the smallest sweetest twinkly little voice just yell LOOK AT ALL THIS DEAD STUFF
Standing knee deep in the ocean at 8:30 PM trying to catch something with her bare hands, determined to "catch us dinner" (we've already eaten dinner)
"Why is there green stuff on the eggs?"
"It's just seasoning, a choice the chef made"
"Oh do they have a soos chef?
"I mean probably?"
"Okay.... can I talk to them about their choosing green stuff?"
"No baby"
"CHEFS CAN TALK THO!"
Dance party on the balcony so we can wave to all the bachelorette parties walking back from the beach and they can watch a 4 year old drop it low
BYE OCEAN SEE YOU NEXT YEAR 👋
