in the end, it's never just the dark you seek when balance slays the demon, you'll find peace

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in the end, it's never just the dark you seek when balance slays the demon, you'll find peace

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Ben’s decidedly Texan influence isn’t simply something he grew into or picked up over the years; his father was a native Texan, and the little knick-knacks around the house he shared with his mother in Derry are reflective of things that his father had kept throughout his life.
he bears a striking resemblance to his father, even early on in life, when his pudgy cheeks are more prominent than those studious eyes or a half-cocked smile that’s ugly not because of its wearer, but simply because it’s unpracticed, and would later become nothing short of dazzling. his voice carries a slight accent to it -- another trait from his father -- that’s not terribly strong, but it’s noticeable enough to feel out of place in New England.
after leaving Derry, loneliness consumes his life again. fading childhood memories make his “lone wolf” lifestyle seem like the most natural thing in the world. he’s arguably the loneliest of the Losers in adulthood, with no marriage or true friends to speak of. he’s successful and rich, to be sure, but he’s miserable.
he’s tried to stave away the sadness, spent nights with people he wished he could feel something for, people he wished could make him feel something, anything-- but he’s only ever truly loved once, and aside from brief flashes in his mind of the brightest red, flowing like leaves in autumn, those memories and surges of passion were locked away with the rest of his time in Derry. even when he might occasionally be enjoying someone’s company, there’s not a minute that goes by where he doesn’t feel like he’s destined to be on his own.
where 👏🏻 is 👏🏻 the 👏🏻 bev / ben 👏🏻 content 👏🏻

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if the condition had been new, or more localized, he might have understood, but loneliness both encompassed his life and overreached it. it simply was.
Under The Dome: Speak of the Devil (01.11)
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