lon

tagging revamps in progress! this blog is years old and I have a lot to sift through

fairy tail

digimon

alvin and the chipmunks || aatc

sonic the hedgehog

dc comics

tmnt || rottmnt

feel free to search for other characters, these are just the mains

lyon vastia, gray fullbuster

takeru takaishi

alvin seville, simon seville

miles "tails" prower, sonic (WIP)

tim drake, dick grayson

rottmnt: donnie, leo, raph, mikey, april, cassandra, casey jr we refer to cassandra as casey here 🙏

I have older works but I'm not linking them because old. Longer summaries available on the actual fics. anything in blue is a part of you better show 'em why you talk so loud

Time: Now that Gray's returned from Tenrou, Lyon reflects on the past, the time he's lost with Gray, and how to move forward.

Last Ages: To save the future, Ultear casts Last Ages. Instead of taking her time, the spell takes her ability to manipulate it.

he remembers: Galuna Island retelling; growing up and realizing there was more to the story than you could understand as a child.

A Light to Call Home: self-indulgent Trans!Lyon fic

you better show 'em why you talk so loud: my Lyon au, his life, etc.

yappology: nonsense, chatting, literally whatever lon talks: more serious conversations lon writes: anything writing related, complaining, wips, etc ledits: any edits, if you want to see them they're all posted on my TikTok Activism and awareness: political or humanitarian issues lo-nalyze: more lengthy, serious analyses and ramblings

Credits:

@bronzewasp, @sweetmelodygraphics, @dollywons, @cafekitsune, @poisonharvey

As for other people? They weren't interacting with anyone. ever. Leo knows he's a good manipulator, can lie his way out of things, can read people's motivations, etc etc. But beyond getting his way out of trouble or manipulating his siblings from time to time for a shenanigan, it wasn't important and it wasn't cool in the same way everyone else's skills were. And I don't think his brother's realized he had this skill either, or at least how valuable it would be to their team.

Raph was their protector, Donnie built their home, Mikey just emulates effortless skill in everything he does, and April is tenacious and strong, has that same Skill Aura as Mikey if you will. And all of these things have a flashy cool factor Leo craves. He's the cool guy! But charisma doesn't have that, not in the same way. So he compensates with his rad skills and skateboarding tricks. But those aren't as useful (especially when he tends to goof the former when it counts).

Before the team formed, Leo's skills didn't really serve any purpose. And when Leo loves and respects his family so much alongside the tangible evidence that they're better, it's easy for him to place their pedestal above him. Leo's also very unaware that literally every cast member has their own complex about the value they bring to the table, their place, their skills, etc. To him, they're all so confident and sure of themselves, stable in knowing who they are and what they can do. And he's. not.

When they decide they wanna be heros, things start to shift. Leo's skills get to shine a little more, but it's not really acknowledged. And it's not as obvious. Leo get's his flashy cool thing: portals! But he's bad at them. Origami Tsunami shows off his strategic mind and ability to rally the team very early on, and that he's the most level headed of the bunch. let's not go after the spine breaking bandit guys that sounds like a #badidea!! and he spins to make it sound cool. A good leader doesn't let their team be in over their head and inspires them, etc.

But the thing is this skill isn't hyped up like everyone else's. Nobody's going omg Leo yess great speech! and when they get onto the field they first listen to Raph's plan because he's their leader at that point. So everyone views Raph as the plan guy. But it's Leo who helps cheer them up after the plan fails and comes up with the paper store. And nobody really realizes how good that plan is, another example of Leos strengths getting pushed under the rug because to a bunch of teens it's not as cool so it doesn't stick out as much. And then the plan fails because they snatch all the paper and run, it's Donnie's tracker that saves it. So it's not a victory in Leo's own head, or anyone else's. He is the one who comes up with the sprinkler idea, which again, brain, but nobody really acknowledges it, which is what Leo both craves and kinda needs for his self esteem.

The first bit of external validation Leo get's is during Shell in a Cell where he stumbles into being a wrestling champion just to realize he's not actually good at it and it isn't easy, and of course his strong brother is better at it. It makes a lot of sense to me that Minotaur Maze comes immediately after that. He's chasing that high! All while very blatantly feeling insecure. I don't think they realize those feelings aren't a bit because of the way Leo acts in general, which is in part his personality and also him trying to deflect anything that hurts.

As for his charisma, he tries to face man a few times in the first few episodes his thing that he's placing all his self worth eggs in (especially since portals are an Issue at this point and his brother's aren't shy in how little they trust him in that, meanwhile Mikey and Raph picked up their mystic weapons really fast). The Fast and the Furriest in the restaurant when trying to find out who took the tank, which he fails at pretty badly.. Minotaur Maze with Hueso and at the end of the maze, which just gets his brothers mad at him for his Shenanigans despite getting them out of a bad situation. He was the reason for it in the first place. Bug Busters puts all of this to a head. He's screaming the entire time let's not trust this lady guys I have a bad feeling GUYS and they're like lmao okay sure Leo.

Leo's placed himself in this paradox of wanting his brothers to take him seriously but not wanting them to Expect anything of him because he doesn't think he can live up to an expectation. He never has before. He's the least favorite (do I think a lot of it comes down to his daddy issues? yes I do. he acts like he doesn't care so it doesn't hurt, and also he's just generally pretty nonchalant). He acts care free and then wants them to listen to what he says and just. know he's not joking. He's trying real hard to have both. It really bugs him that they can't see through his comedy, that they don't trust him and don't really take him seriously, either (but Leo refuses to take himself seriously. that involves confronting uncomfortable emotions.)

The episode starts with an example of Raph's early leadership, go in, hit stuff, win, in contrast to Leo's plans. Leo's immediately like hey we gotta make a new plan or this guys gonna get mutated. Leo tries to protect Bullhop and Raph immediately yells at him. and he's like DUDE do you guys hear me when I speak??? At all?? Ever?? oh look he got mutated! to which Raph's response is Leo omg if you just stuck to the plan this wouldn't have happened!! Raph's being stubborn because he thinks Leo's just. doing his Thing and not taking this seriously. So Leo spends the entire episode screaming because nobody's listening to him. It's the first big conflict between the two (though Donnie calls it a classic raph leo argument, which is interesting to me). And it's hard for Leo to value his own skills. even when he proves himself everyone's mad at him.

They meet Big Mama and Leo's like hey guys bad vibes! bad idea! I'm the people person guys, cmon. Raph and Mikey are too trusting and Donnie's bad at reading people. Leo knows this. Nobody realizes Leo knows this. Leo knows his brother's skills and weaknesses well, another big strength of his. His skills and talents are on full display and everyone's just like lol anyway! how's he supposed to feel like he has serves a purpose on the team? But also, how are his brothers supposed to know this? This is like. their first time meeting a seemingly trustworthy person. They've been isolated their entire lives. It's not like they've ever been betrayed before. These kids have never really. met people before. bar April and obvious villains.

So what's happening here is Leo is good at this Thing that never really had a chance to shine before now, and its not flashy like his brother's talents, and he's spent all this time acting like a class clown because he's Like That and he's hiding a little bit (the later is something I think gets worse as the series goes on). Nobody realizes Leo's good at this thing. So they think Leo is. being Leo and not making a serious judgement call, a judgement call they should listen to because he's got great intuition, apparently. Which is news to them

Big Mama reveals she's a spider? SEE I TOLD you guys there was something--Omg LEO stop being mean to this nice lady!! (because Leo is notoriously a bit mean. this isn't out of character for him to just be Like That). Which in turn hurt's Leo's feelings more. And an upset Leo is a petty Leo. A frustrated Raph is a Raph who's just gonna roll his eyes and move on and not listen. Rinse repeat.

And even when Raph finally admits Leo was right he's not even in the room. Leo the entire time he's saving his brothers is just mmmngnnnnmgnmmm >:CCCCCCCCC nobody listens to meeeee >:CCC which yk what fair. but also hurt him and he's focusing on the anger of it all because that's easier. And then he does a good plan to save them all on his own. He's immediately met with "you shouldn't have left us!" the poor guy can't do anything right this episode lmklfsdf.

To Raph's credit, is Leo being annoying about it? yeah. Do I fault Leo for being petty here? Not really. But if my little brother was acting like this I'd probably be pissed off too LKMLSDF. I think Raph's comment about Leo being a poor winner is fair considering it's Leo and we know he is. Nobody realizes there is a lot of hurt underneath his attitude this entire episode. I think this is really where Leo's 'nobody trusts me' complex starts. The whole situation would have been helped if Leo just said hey it actually kinda hurts my feelings that you disregarded any concern I had today, but Leo was never gonna say that are you kidding?

And even after alllll of that, Leo listens to Raph when the plan is good (portal to the roof) and trusts him to catch the bugs. He's being petty, but he's not stupid. Only for Raph to not trust him again and listen when he says hey I think the guy that tried to kill us will, in fact, throw me off the roof. This moments a big one for Raph because it's the first really big danger one of his brother's are in, but it's also big for Leo because he's upset. He spent all day begging his brothers to trust him and they didn't and he almost died because of it (COUGH)

anyway. I think bug busters captures my point pretty well. they've never been in situations like this before so they don't really understand how useful Leo's particular skill set is, which reinforces Leo's own complex of I don't bring enough to the table. All of which continues throughout the first season of Leo trying really hard to get the portal thing to work to compensate for it.

It's not until Many Unhappy Returns that Leo finally gets the validation he was looking for, but even that came with some issues. Leo finally puts on the table that he doesn't think the team trusts him, Splinter doesn't trust him. To Splinter's credit, they're going after the woman that manipulated him and held him captive for years. It's less that he doesn't trust Leo and more his fear of Big Mama, but also he doesn't trust Leo to take it seriously. Which. hurts Leo. who already thinks his dad doesn't like him that much.

He spends the episode begging Splinter who says outright he should have brought Donnie (and Leo knows Donnie is not the People guy, and Leo's got this Thing with Donnie. he's extra mean to him in particular because Donnie's got something he's really good at and Leo. doesn't). And when Leo comes back from that victory he's met with distrust from his brothers

He proves again that he knew exactly how that fight was gonna go, that he knew they could handle it! He and Raph have their little heart to heart, everyones like OHHH Leo's actually good at this. It should be a win. It was a win! Leo's attitude kinda chills out in S2 in comparison to the back half of S1, but he's still chasing external validation because even though he had that good moment, I don't think he really internalized it. Yeah, his team trusts him now, but he's still not overly confident in what he brings to the table, bar the portals he's mastered.

I also want to briefly mention I don't think Leo completely understood what Raph was working through at the end of S2. The way he felt like everything was his responsibility until he ended up in that very same situation in the movie.

Getting made leader, from Leo's perspective, feels less like an acknowledgment of his skills and more like a punishment. Splinter' doesn't explain to Leo why he made that decision. So from Leo's perspective his dad who didn't trust him to be serious just threw this massive responsibility onto him now that the big scary Shredder threat was out of the way. For a kid with some baggage already between him and his dad, I don't think he thought it was a good thing.

Raph's S2 finale arc is him realizing the leader weight is too much for him, that he needs to let his team in. I think Splinter making Leo leader was a moment for him to take a step back and be like. oh. you know what. yeah. I fully believe Raph had total faith in that decision which is partly why he was pushing Leo so much, and Raph didn't want the job anymore! Raph has his own arc of trying to come up with plans but not being good at it, but he knows Leo is. it's like second nature. Leo doesn't know that. He's confident, but not enough to feel like he should be in charge. It stirs up a lot of those prior tensions he and Raph had. Raph's extra frustrated that Leo isn't stepping up to the plate (I genuinely think Leo was just like fuck you dad I'm not doing it since when do you call the shots) because he knows Leo is capable and Raph doesn't want to be the leader anymore. All Raph is asking is for Leo to take things serious, not to change, to do things differently, to try.

I go into their relationship in particular in my movie analysis so I'll try not to repeat myself a bunch lol. I think Leo subconsciously knows he doesn't want that responsibility, doesn't trust himself with it because what does he bring to it? Leo doesn't realize how well suited he is for that role. Nobody has ever told him, hey, how strategic you are is a strength. Your ability to inspire is a strength. The way you know the team inside and out is a strength. So Leo just has all this festering hurt of all the times nobody listened to him, he just feels stupid in the role. It's not for him, Raph's their protector and leader, not him. Why would it be him? And now Raph keeps yelling at him so it must be because he's doing something wrong like before. Leo projects the insecurities he's been carrying without realizing Raph's been suffocating under the role Leo's trying so hard to run away from because of how scary it is.

Take the way Leo acts after Raph is taken. Leo doesn't do what he usually does, create a plan, be strategic. No. The plan is ninja in, ninja their faces, ninja out. He's trying to emulate Raph's leadership. If it was Leo that got taken, Raph would fix it! Raph would know what to do. Raph's saved his life before. Leo doesn't expect that level from himself. And I think Leo is terrified to lose someone else after what happened to Karai. He doesn't want this responsibility and he doesn't trust himself with it. We know the idea of his brother's dying terrifies him, and he doesn't think he can stop it, so he tries to be like Raph

A Raph before learning not to shoulder it all on his own, that is. But CJ beats that lesson into him pretty fast. Leo for so long thought that if his family just listened to him so many things would have been avoided. But he also knows how badly he needs them, how he'd be lost and nothing without them.

If we look at the rooftop scene, we see Leo at his best. Inspiring his team, using their respective skills to create a well thought out plan. This moment is why Splinter made Leo the leader, and I'd like to tack on his speech with Raph as well. Because Leo knows what to say when it counts. But in Leo's head, I think he feels like he's just. not as good. He doesn't have those skills his brother's have. He's this third wheel that tags along and sometimes spouts some Bullshit. He doesn't view what happened on the roof as a skill, I don't think. He's learned that leadership isn't having the answers, he thinks it's about being able to carry the responsibility. Partly, yes, but it's also everything he's been doing since the beginning.

Before the series, they had never been in a situation where Leo's skillset would save their lives. Not like Donnie and Raph, Mikey less of that and more of a cool factor until the series where he starts shining and breaking out of his baby brother role. Even Leo's ninpo is more a tool, if that makes sense, where his brother's ninpos emphasize their own strengths (Leo doesn't realize the portals emphasize his because strategy isn't a strength he associates with himself). But it's Leo's job to know how to use those strengths, that's a strength in itself.