OBJECTION!!!

I need to draw some lovely people to cure my stressful fragile little heart

happy father’s day to these defense lawyer dads

Don’t forget to specify the muse if it’s a multimuse blog!

❝  eh .  i don’t feel like giving you the will to live today .  ❞ ❝  surpass your constraints and terrorise their loved ones !  ❞ ❝  with any luck ,  humanity will run you down like they do their own !  ❞ ❝  i’m going to kill you in your sleep.  ❞ ❝  this is the height of stupidity .  ❞ ❝  square up for crocodile tears !  ❞ ❝  i personally don’t respect you enough to care , tbh .  ❞ ❝  if i explained WHY ,  you might have an existensial crisis .  ❞ ❝  it’s a fourth dimension joke ;  you won’t get it .  ❞ ❝  my faith in humanity will never restore and this one of the many reasons why  .  ❞ ❝  no one levels up through complaining ,  contrary to popular belief .  ❞ ❝  i’m an extremely stabby pyromaniac in my spare time .  ❞ ❝  bold of you to assume i have respect for the dead or you .  ❞ ❝  that would imply you have an obsession with corgis .  ❞ ❝  you thought i was referring to you ?  ❞ ❝  no feelings hurt ,  just this chair .  ❞ ❝  in the mean time ,  i’ll stare at you ominously from the wall .  ❞ ❝  man ,  that guy went out like his pizza went in !  ❞ ❝  speaking of ,  did i ever mention the guy who traded his soul for a margherita ?  ❞ ❝  first it’s pizza ,  then it’s a knife in your back .  ❞ ❝  guess i’ll kill ___ for the fun of it now .  ❞ ❝  i hope there are no sentient sponges in here .  ❞ ❝  hmm .  you’re right .  all of you suck .  ❞ ❝  i recommend luring them to the nearest glitter pit disguised as burning acid !  ❞ ❝  dodge ball but with literal meteorites .  ❞ ❝  i had a kickass party and none of you were invited .  ❞ ❝  life is suffering ,  and you’re in denial of it , ___ .  ❞ ❝  being born increases your chance of death by 100% .  ❞ ❝  your inconveniences mean very little to me .  ❞ ❝  it’s hard to understand passive aggressiveness over the internet .  ❞ ❝  i think it involved a homocidal car .  ❞ ❝  did i mention i possessed a fisherman once ?  he really fell for the hook , line and sinker !  ❞ ❝  you’re all disgusting ,  so no surprise there .  ❞ ❝  guess it’s a good thing i’m going to make your boy suffer .   ❞ ❝  frankly i hope ___ dies .  ❞ ❝  the point is ,  you look like a moron .  ❞ ❝  ah ,  the world turning upside down .  my most favourite aesthetic .  ❞ ❝  your lack of preparation means natural selection will kill you off .  ❞ ❝  he’s dead .  i killed him .  ❞ ❝  i sincerely hope you drown in your own blood .  ❞ ❝  oh ,  you’re both adorable .  but ships have a habit of hitting an iceberg and never being seen again .  ❞ ❝  i sure hope he dies due to unfortunate circumstances .  ❞ ❝  you have a sad ,  sad life ,  ___ .  ❞ ❝  sounds like you need to do your homework or give up altogether .  or use a cheat sheet .  me .  i’m the cheat sheet .  ❞ ❝  but you can never rig a dream the way i can .  ❞ ❝  steal my shit and get hit .  ❞ ❝  so ,  ya’ like jazz ?  ❞ ❝  jokes , jokes …  hmm .  i got another one !  YOUR SUFFERING .  ❞ ❝  lol ,  i hurt everyone ?  ❞ ❝  household objects just kind of .  came to life by themselves .  ❞ ❝  reminder that i murdered several people yesterday .  ❞ ❝  you know ,  it’s hilarious how many nerds endanger themselves on a daily basis .  you’d think their high iq would save them from their suffering ,  but nah. it’s their downfall .  ❞ ❝  every button you ever press .  i am counting them .  i won’t forget them .  ❞ ❝  sucks no one died .  sorry .  someone IMPORTANT .  ❞ ❝  siblings are suffocating .  ❞ ❝  was just gonna’ casually drop by like ,  ‘ hi ,  yeah ,  i exist .  your world view is shattered ! ‘  ❞ ❝  i’m a goth kid .  i rule the night .  ❞ ❝  there’ll be widespread panic and not in the good way .  well ,  good for me .  but not them .  ❞

❝  except me .  i’m mean all the time .  ❞ ❝  it’s only a matter of time before the ecosystem swallows them up like a paper shredder .  ❞ ❝  you won’t actually accomplish anything .  you just stand there hoping you will .  ❞ ❝  don’t trivialise my love .  my love kills .  ❞ ❝  i’m feeling really appreciated right now .  ❞ ❝  what part of  ‘ i read chat history ‘  don’t you understand ?  ❞ ❝  boy i can’t wait to murder that guy .  ❞ ❝  i’m crashing my own funeral .  sorry ,  that’s how it works .  ❞ ❝  please ,  i’m absolutely charming and you know it .  ❞ ❝  i hate your existence and hope you die in the worst pain imaginable .  ❞ ❝  it’s not like i’m casually throwing out ominous comments left and right .  ❞ ❝  you really can’t pick on subtleties and this annoys me .  ❞ ❝  next thing you know everyone is trying to steal his eyes .  ❞ ❝  well ,  you know what they say !  third time unlucky .  ❞ ❝  that’s how the egotistic idiots roll !  ❞ ❝  yeah ,  kid ,  it’s entirely your fault .  ❞ ❝  hahahahahahaha !  who’s sad now ?  ❞ ❝  hate to break it to ya’ ,  but i’m an eternal abyss of feeling nothing !  ❞ ❝  all the channels are the right channels !  ❞ ❝  being popular is people constantly summoning you when you have legitimate business to attend to .  ❞ ❝  seems consistent to the rest of your life .  ❞ ❝  but i can play piano !  ❞ ❝  when in doubt ,  do a barrel roll .  fixes everything .  ❞ ❝  personally my favourite is the fake friendship .  where you can backstab the other person at any given moment .  ❞ ❝  i broke a long time ago ,  but it’s the kind of broken that’s cool and never dies .  ❞ ❝  i like these guys .  they have good taste .  ❞ ❝  hey ,  ___ ,  your future is gonna suck !  ❞ ❝  you can’t water a garden with acid .  you’ll only watch it all burn .  ❞ ❝  it was more convenient to act like everything was fine .  ❞ ❝  he’s too lost in that twisted ambition to REALLY care about you .  ❞ ❝  how’s that long distance relationship been working out for ya’ ?  ❞ ❝  … wow ,  how long were you sitting on that one ?  ❞ ❝  i don’t give out all my spoilers .  ❞ ❝  what kind of friend enables such destructive behaviour ?  ❞ ❝  he’s planning to kill 78% of you anyways .  ❞ ❝  no ,  but i like being the answer guy .  ❞ ❝  they think you’re lame .  i read their thoughts .  ❞ ❝  unfortunately i have lots of vpns .  ❞ ❝  oh ,  i’m not helping you figure that out .  i just want to inform you you’re screwed .  ❞ ❝  i too walk off near-death experiences .  ❞ ❝  you people really have a full schedule with people trying kill you and your loved ones .  ❞

“I got a bottle of whiskey calling my name so I may not be back here tomorrow morning or ever.”

🍆  :    your  muse  makes  a  suggestive  joke  but  my  muse  actually  acts  on  it .