*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

King Arthur slept through the Norman Conquest, Edward I’s annexation of Wales, the Wars of the Roses, the English Civil War, World Wars I & II, etc. etc. BUT if Prydain had another giant monster boar crisis, you best believe his ass would be up and rearing to go. 🙄

born to boar hunt, forced to be the once and future king

Britain never has to worry about roving packs of 30-50 feral hogs swarming their small children

It used to be cold. There used to be all these bugs.

Maybe he understood for the first time that to the boy he was himself an alien. A being from a planet that no longer existed. The tales of which were suspect. He could not construct for the child’s pleasure the world he’d lost without constructing the loss as well and he thought perhaps the child has known this better than he.

The grass used to be green in the summer not brown

In autumn, puddles would freeze overnight, and give the sharpest, sweetest snap when you stepped on them. All gone by late morning, but reappearing the next day with sharp crinkles and chimes.

mayflies used to coat the road so thoroughly in spring that their corpses made the road more slippery than black ice.

Conservative beauty standards are back with a vengeance which means it's especially important to go out this summer with bellies out and bodies unshaved. Also be unapologetically disabled with mobility aids and wearable medical devices and stim toys and ear defenders and all that stuff. You need it. People need to see it. Everyone needs to be reminded that life is unquestioningly more enjoyable when you're not living inside an arbitrary set of rules created by people who are offended by all the wrong things.

"like a boss" by lonely island was released ten thousand years ago when mammoths still roamed the big wide world. feel old yet?

used to think it terribly silly (and kinda funny) when fantasy or sci-fi stories would have people refer to major recent historical events as The Flood or The Incident or The Revolution, and im sure historians fucking hate that because it's not helpful or descriptive, but we sure do be calling it The Pandemic

this sculpture is from 2011 by artist sara swink

cats have been bothering humans since at least 2011

I Defeated the Demon Lord but it Turns Out the Demon Army was Largely Unaffected and I Fell Victim to a Flawed Belief in Great Man Theory

I Executed The Demon Lord With One Flawless Strike And After A Brief Power Struggle The New Demon Government Is Substantially More Committed To The War Because Of Some Reason I Don't Know

I Successfully Overthrew The Demon Lord And Instituted Demon Democracy But They Voted For A Commie So The CIA Not Some Fantasy Equivalent The Actual CIA Who Have Known About Magic And Alternate Realms The Whole Damn Time But Won't Just Unisekai Me Launched A Counter Coup And That's When Things Really Went To Shit

disabled ppl we need to start lying to nosy people okay? you tell me i'm too young to need a cane and i will tell you point blank that maybe you should tell that to the guy who ran me over. you don't get an explanation of my health issues you get lies and depending on how much of an asshole i want to be that lie will be anything from a humble car crash to a 1 billion lions attack. mind yr business.

"i could never live like that" well maybe you'll have to because this happened overnight. yeah you heard me i was the most able bodied man in the world but then one morning bam i woke up disabled. yeah you could have that too. there's no cure either you'll just wake up one morning and now you have to live like me

"what happened" well have you ever seen looney tunes? yeah an anvil landed on me and squished me flat.