⋆🐾°'/𝐿𝑢𝑧/'⋆. 𐙚 ˚

So two years ago I met this girl named SC(initials to protect her identity duhh) At first I thought was so interesting! And no doubt she was! She's very helpful, strong, and pretty smart as well! I envied her so much! And i hope I get to be friends with her for forever! Until.... I saw her red flags...

She was pretty touchy... By the way- I'm the type of person who LOVES physical touch Cloudear. But theres some boundaries that she crossed that i disliked, which i won't say or tell since that is a touchy subject for me personally- But when i told her about it- She actually understand my pov and stopped touching the spots i disliked! I was pretty happy with that :3 So I kept going along with her, creating sweet memories!

Until some things started are getting a little noticeable.... Like her jealousy problems, how TOO honest she is, and the fact she can get quite aggressive.. But I ignored that because her personal life isn't really... Good. So whatever she did that pissed me off, hurt others, and etc- I always saw her as a poor victim. Babying her actions and comforting her-

Until one day- She started ignoring her own group and starting going to mine. Which I didn't mind at first! But I noticed that she isn't really talking to her group of friends often like before- So curious little me decided to ask why? And she said that it was because her other close friend decided to talk with another friend in the friend group more then her... So I was like huh.... So I REMEMBERED. CLEARLY. FROM WHAT I REMEMBERED. Can I have permission to say it to her? Since this has been going on for weeks! And she said sure. But she didn't specify what can I tell and not tell

So I told AA(Her other close friend that hanged out with the other more then her) And I told her! Then she got sad that she heard the truth... Which I felt bad for. But one day... everything changed.

Sidenote: I was busy with practice and i keep getting scolded by not doing 'this' or 'that' correctly. And I wanted to cry and rant it to someone. So I turned toward to SC for comfort, but she said "I feel you... I know that situation" and then instantly goes back to her work. Which I felt pretty mad and pissed at that(But I know that this was my fault. I'm not going to blame her, since if i do- I'll just make her look like shes the reason why everything's wrong. Most of it IS her fault, but not entirely) So I got in a mood and rushed off. And she came after me to give me my things because i left some back accidentally. So I snatched it and stomped away. But at least I ranted and cried about it to a different person.

Anyways- back to the present. So I gave her space for the past three days. Because you know... I got mad and stuff, and I was going to apologize, but my friend said- "Maybe wait it out a little longer... She's probably still fussy about it" And so I did. But one day.... Everything changed. I was just going out after work stuff. Until she gripped my arm so hard it hurts. And she(SC) said "You've completely broken my trust. I'll never forgive you again." from what i can remember... I froze because I was scared of what she's going to do to me because mind you- SHES STRONG. AND SHE COULD DESTROY ME IN A SECOND. So I didn't do anything. And she released my arm and left. And I thought... Is it because I told the truth...? And indeed it is. And somehow she knew, which I'm guessing from AA

I wanted to cry because I lost a good friend... Until this experience made me realize... I have to take care of my other friendships better, there's better people outside that'll treat me better, I'll probably outgrow this anyways... So I didn't cry. Instead, I wanted to improve. Not to become like her, not to baby her, and not to lead my friendship through deceit. So I kept that thought throughout the whole day. I still felt sad about it though... Until one of my friends LS decided to greet me. So I greeted her back, thinking that'll be all. Until she came over and....

Hugged me, and said goodbye because she had to go home. And at that moment... I remembered that I have many others who'll care for me. It may be a normal hug to you guys... But to me... It was everything that I needed. A hug. And I'll forever remember her action and how much it has pushed me to be honest.

So the next day.... I decided to be honest and what I disliked about my friends. Because babying and lying on't do anything, so I spoke about it. And they... Didn't mind? I was in shock, because I thought they'll be hurt by my words. But they understood and listened. And I finally got it off my chest! So I asked them, "What do you guys not like about me..? BE HONEST AS YOU WANT!!!" And they said... nothing's wrong. I was in shock once again. I thought I'll have to hear painful words. But I got nothing.. And complimented too! I'll list down what they said about me:

"Your the bestest friend I've ever had!"

"Your so sweet and polite! I could never hate you!"

"What are you talking about? There's nothing about you that I hate"

"Your such a good listener! Who even dislikes you???"

And guys... I felt so flustered by the many compliments chat- //>//<// Turns out these guys are pretty sweet in their own way.. And I'm forever grateful for it >.< Looks like.. Being honest and polite is quite a good combo ehe~ (Cloudears should do that too!!!) But having friends who'll pick me up at my lowest or highest is the best feeling ever! And the friends in SC's friendgroup have also dealt with her... Toxicity before(this isn't their first time by the way). So they know what I've felt...

But breaking off a friendship that has kept me bound for many months.. Is refreshing and nice... I just hope that SC can find someone who can TRUELY accept her, relate, be with her no matter what, comfort her... Because I'm NOT suited for that. But I truely hope. I TRUELY HOPE- That she can heal and improve herself... And one day find that person who can fill that empty space in her heart...

And summarizes everything..! But you guys want a short summarize? alright~

Don't lead your friendships, relationships, etc. With deceit or evil intention. And don't baby their actions even if they're someone who is close to you, a victim, friends with someone special in your life, a relative... or etc. Remember that you have a billion people in this world! And one of them will love you no matter what! Even if it seems impossible! Trust in yourself! And fate will give you what you want if you worked hard enough

By Mari<3

as many of you likely know, there is conflict ongoing in our little fandom. it's disappointing to me that this is even considered a conflict, as i believe it should have been resolved long ago. but unfortunately, a few bad faith actors encouraging the behaviors of one malicious individual has lead to where we are now.

i know that is very openly hostile towards a certain opinion, but i cannot deny that there is a personal stake in this issue for me. this person has hurt people i love and care about, as well as caused me major offense, and the more information i know the more i cannot choose to stand by and say nothing while they are let off with a slap on the wrist.

i know my words likely do not mean much. i do not have much reach, and this blog has been majorly inactive. but i cannot sit by and let a community i was so excited to be a part of be rotted from the inside out.

my main statements are this:

do not take all that you hear at face value. always ask for evidence for claims made.

people are not inherently victims because of their status, mental state, or any other reason they produce. it is easy to lie on the internet. someone with the mask of a victim can easily go behind closed doors and be the perpetrator without consequences if they are not called on it.

harm caused is harm that must be met with consequences. take the time to understand all sides before jumping to conclusions.

if reading that upsets you, take a moment and consider why. have you considered the "people's princess" is not all she makes herself out to be? have you considered that she has hurt many, many people, and goes out of her way to do so. there is irrefutable evidence. i hope, with all my heart, those defending her will open their eyes to this fact once all the information is available to them. and believe me, all the information will be available.

i do not condone any of the actions of this individual, and am disappointed in the people choosing to defend them knowing what they know.

while there is a much lower chance of this individual seeing my message over tk's, i still feel the need to speak to them. if not to get through to them, then to simply state my thoughts.

you disgust me. the fact that as soon as one person was comfortable speaking their discomfort, many more came forward to corroborate those feelings is horrifying. especially for someone your age. it truly baffles me that even in this modern age, with all the information in the world, you still choose to act the way you do. because it is a choice.

while i have the slightest bit of sympathy for you, it is near constantly tamped out by how you choose to continue hurting people i love and pushing back on the consequences of your actions. because that is what this is, consequences. not some targeted bullying campaign as you continue to claim and whine.

you have hurt people. publicly, privately, and you have gone to horrifying extents to do so. the fact you have yet to receive no consequences for it until now baffles me. the fact that people continue to defend you knowing what you have done baffles me even more.

you are a bigot. a public, documented bigot. you bitch and whine about how hard this is for you, but have you considered the pain you have caused others? how they are doing now, watching you get away with hurting them once again? you make me sick.

most sickening of all? you have shown no remorse. you have done nothing but play the victim, obstructing evidence so that more people are willing to take your side. even in your pathetic joke of a statement, you did not say the word sorry. at all. you cannot do it in public nor in private. it's truly awe-inspiring how full of yourself you have to be to act in that way.

since you claim all these interactions to be "attacks," stick to your word and stay the hell away from me and the rest of this fandom. you are a poison, and you are not welcome on my blog and, ideally, the rest of this community.

justice will be served, whether you like it or not. perhaps it would be best to simply fess up rather than continue to play victim. but you and i both know you won't do that. i await the day the information against you is public, so that the people you have hurt can finally rest.

TLDR: do not believe what you hear until you are given evidence.

we exist in a world and, unfortunately, a fandom where people will abuse their power to get away with their misdeeds. many of which have occurred plainly in public, and are even still available on their page.

more details will be released soon. please stay wary. take what you hear with a grain of salt.

i sincerely hope this situation blows over in the way it should. it has been so exhausting watching people i care for be weighed down so heavily by an issue that should have been resolved with an apology ages ago. still, i hope this message is spread around so that, when the information goes public, we as a community can handle the aftershocks with grace.

i apologize to all the people whose asks will continue to sit in my inbox. i hope to continue to entertain when i am less busy and this issue has been truly and properly resolved.

as a majority of you know, i'm part of a server that's been trying to suss me out for a while. recently, i've been invited by some people in there to bear witness to a myriad of... fandom conflicts, and to understand the true nature of an ongoing matter that's been affecting a number of individuals. i recognize that my platform in this community is bare-bones, at best. i do not have the influence nor the fanbase to make waves to the degree that others can. but i have a platform nonetheless, a voice, and so i am compelled to use it. i love this community. at least, what i've seen of it. i can't bear to watch misinformation and clear bias from unfair power dynamic tear apart what is meant to be a close knit and welcoming fandom. i firmly believe that all parties involved are culpable to a degree, but there is a clear side that i don't believe anyone with common sense should be taking.

so, all that being said, i want to make this very clear: don't take everything you see, especially without solid proof, as fact. when someone comes online and pretends their hurtful, problematic actions are arbitrary and can be swept under the rug because of their clout, popularity, mental state, or any other defining factors that don't negate the harm they have caused - make sure you have listened to all sides of the story before you speak out in defense of them.

some of you may recognize the specific situation i'm speaking about right now. some of you may even have your hackles raised, ready to jump me for speaking out about this against your supposed 'people's princess'. i want you to know that i stand behind every syllable of what i am saying, and the evidence i have been shown is undeniable. if you see it too - and chances are, you will - you won't be able to deny it either. i know where i stand here. i do not condone any of the behaviors exhibited by this person, nor do i support those who try to defend them after knowing what they have done.

"but TK, what does that have to do with you stepping away from roleplaying?" the person in question, who i won't mention by name until the full situation has been aired out publicly, has sent me asks. multiple. long ones. creepy, parasocial ones. do not misread me: i'm more than happy to be interacting with people who enjoy nulla and his character as much as i do, and i delight in seeing people who are passionate about their love for nulla. however, i recognized this person immediately, and the content of their asks alongside the nature of their behavior that i was already aware of made me extremely uncomfortable. i do not have any desire or business interacting with this person or anyone who is aware of the gravity of their actions and condones them anyway. i refuse to use nulla as a conduit to ease their guilty conscience and make them feel better about receiving the consequences of their actions, for once. and so, due to the volume of asks i've received from them and the looming threat that i may receive more (or, god forbid, that some of my current asks are from them), i am taking a break from roleplay for now: at least, until this situation has been publicized.

and, because i know that this person is somewhat likely to see this, let me say my piece upfront so there's absolutely no mistake about how i feel about you interacting with me, especially to the extent that you have: i will not sit here and pretend like i don't recognize you, or that i don't know the things you have done to others in this community. i do not care who you are or how many spineless sheep enable you. you, very simply, abhor me. no matter your age or your circumstances, your actions and how you have been behaving without a single modicum of remorse is vile and disgusting. i want nothing to do with you and i refuse to associate myself or this blog's nulla portrayal with you. i will not be another person to enable you, and neither will my roleplay. you can sob and post and wail about how attacked and hurt you feel from finally being forced to confront the consequences of your actions, but sitting behind your keyboard and crying about how you're being victimized by the recipients of your bigotry does not make you the victim, nor does it make you in the right. in fact, until you actually mature and learn from the consequences of your actions (which i highly doubt you will, given your track record), i am in unwavering support of having you blacklisted from this community entirely. you have continuously proven yourself to be a blemish and a toxin in this fandom, and it would please me greatly to be rid of your downright repugnant behavior. do not speak to me, send me asks, or even think to mention me in your little dossier of victim blaming, self-sympathizing, and purposeful exclusion of information. if you or any of your little lackeys send me anything or put out any of my or anyone else's information publicly, it will be documented and action will be taken. legal action, if i have to. i know your history. i know exactly who you are and what you have done. there is stone cold evidence against you on file, and spreading misinformation to play the victim and gain sympathy that you do not deserve will result in the release of all of it. publicly.

tl;dr: don't take everything you see, especially without solid proof, as fact.

there are individuals given positions of power in this fandom, who are in support of some disgusting behavior that has been occurring in broad daylight - the details of which will be publicized soon.

keep an eye out and make sure you're taking every statement you see on the internet, especially without hard proof to support them, with a grain of salt.