Hello! You can call me Archie, and this is my writing blog for my SLOP. PORN SLOP.
What do I write about?
Iâm multi-fandom, I wonât name them all because there is⌠so many. So so so many. I need them out of my head. But I do top, gender-neutral or male reader!
Do I do requests?
sort of!
My requests are open if you have any ideas, please send them, I am⌠so uncreative sometimes. My brains goes ahah⌠twink go boing boing on peepee hahaâŚ
I also forget about this blog often, or get serverly embarrassed by my own depravity
please do know your request may not get done! I am one person, and iâll only write about thinks that interest me.
Do I write dom/top characters?
Nope đ I wanna manhandle the characters I like, not the other way around sorry
Will I follow people back?
No, sorry. I low-key fear people and the fact iâm showing my writing on here is a little nerve-wracking rn so⌠not right now. Kinda scared to moot ppl on this blog is all đ iâll probably overcome this but not rn
What are my noâs for writing?
P1ss & sc@t. Iâm not writing that gng sorry. Inc3st,
(iâll add to this â§)
Okay! That is all, thank you for reading and goodbye you FREAK!!!! (lovingly)
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Brett gets edged hehe + gn!reader + its been a minute since I've watched the show, so I watched episode one while I wrote this down, hope its accurate! + I forgot how much I love this average white man + I always write these when I wanna go to bed for some reason
âhgkâ ah⌠ahâ y/n⌠I- I donâtââ whatever he was about to say fell in a keening whine, head slamming back against the pillow with a dull thud, his eyes squeezing shut. âO-oh⌠oh⌠ah⌠ahaâŚâ his thighs twitched, eyes blinking open with a dizzy, breathless giggle.
âYouâ hah⌠I thought you wouldâŚâ he blinked up at the ceiling before his gaze fell to you, kneeling between his legs on the bed, your hand securely wrapping around his overstimulated dick⌠youâd been at it for⌠god, he forgot, but he felt like, wow, a while.
Brett whined softly as your thumb pressed down on the tip of his dick, his abdominal muscles flexing involuntarily. âHahâ shhhoot⌠ohh woahââ he closed his eyes again only for them to fly back open as your hand started to move once more. âOhâ ohh jeezâ y/n, Y/nââ
He writhed in the bed, fingers clutching helplessly at the sheets.
âBaby, stay stillâŚâ you tutted, free hand gripping his thigh tightly, holding him in place. âIâ ahk-⌠âm tryingâ iâm sârryââ
Brettâs weakly met your hand with each stroke. You just started, how was he close again?! âAh, hhah⌠mphââ he dug his teeth into his bottom lip.
âBrettâŚâ you frowned, hand stilling, and the sound he made was akin to a kicked dog. âY/n!ââ he yelped, looking at you with watery eyes. âWhuhâ whatâd i do? Please-- ahh⌠please, âm sorry, âm sârry, I wannaââ you runned your thumb along the vein on the underside of his cock. âGhk-â
Your hand resumed its earlier pace, each stroke making a slick sound, and adding to the foamy ring of pre at the base of his dick.
âAh, ahâ hah⌠ohh⌠ah! Ah!ââ his thighs quivered and back arched.
He was always so easy to work up, it was as pathetic as it was cute, really, his quickly you could take him to the edge and then deny him again and again.
But you would have mercy, you already denied him⌠Mh, 8 times already, if you denied him one more time, heâd probably start crying. A pretty picture, but thatâd have to happen another day.
Brett came with a sob, chest heaving and dick spurting across your fist and his abs.
Bretts thighs quivered and twitched before his legs fell limply apart. âI- I...â
ââŚyou alright?â you asked, pulling your hand away, making his eyes shut with a hiss.
He nodded. âY-yeah- hah⌠Mhm. âM alrightâ iâmâ woah. âm great, âver the moon right now,â
Jabber needs to get beaten up during sex, I can't imagine that man having any fun unless you're whaling on him, bullying his guts while you pull on his locks, tugging his head back to stare at the ceiling, neck arched in an odd angle that is really not comfortable but heâs having the time of his life, eyes rolling back and mouth agape. Shove your fingers down his throat and make him gag, don't be careful! scrape your nails against the roof of his mouth on accident, who cares? He certainly doesn't. If heâs too loud? Put a pillow over his faceeee heâll be fine, if he passes out that's his fault for not being able to take it! Heâs absolutely be trying to kick and punch you if you put him in any position where heâs facing you, you will need to put him in the most odd positions to get him to behave. You will have to INVENT sex positions to keep this man down. If he's running his mouth too much just punch him, it'll keep him quiet for a moment before heâs spewing nonsense again, you outa punch him again
What was wrong with him? A lot, but this had to top the cake.
Grace jerks it as you sleep and has a mental breakdown over it, no set timeline, can be pre suicide mission or post
this was⌠gross. Disrespectful. Weird.
That's what was playing on repeat in Graceâs head as his hand traced over the outline of his cock in his sweats. You were right there. Sleeping soundly, completely unaware of the depraved act he was going.
God. This was insane. He fished his cock out. He was insane. Deranged. A dog who needed to be castrated. âNnhâŚâ
Grace his his bottom lip hard, his gaze drifted to you. You hadn't been sleeping as of late. Just my insomnia coming back to haunt me. It was more than that, he could tell, but that's what you would say everytime
âŚand the one time you're finally able to sleep, he does this!
âInsane⌠âm insane.â Grace hissed, head tipping back and eyes screwing shut. His hand wrapped around his dick and gave a strike, thumb pressing down on the underside before slipping up to thumb at the tip. âAhâ gh⌠hahâŚâ
Grace bit down hard on his tongue, so hard he swears he tastes blood. His hand moved faster and his free one came up to bite inti his knuckles. Don't wake up, please don't wake up. His climax had built embarrassingly fast, and once he finished, he could pretend he never did this!
His eyes flicked open, half-lidded eyes landing on you once more, watching the steady rise and fall of your chest, to the bridge of your nose, and the way you eyes casted shadows over your cheeks.
âPlease... Pleasepleaseplease.⌠of mother f-fudgeâ ah!ââ his hips jolted forward to meet his fist one more time as he reached his peak.
Grace whimpered, shoulders sagging. He blinked the tears from his eyes then grimaced at the mess coating his hand. Gross.
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How it feels when you try to find a fanfic where the MC/reader isn't a white tiny woman, who for some reason isn't capable of intelligent thoughts and just keeps crying and following the ML/romantic interest like she is a child who keeps needing saving and crying
She is also either tiny and small or "chubby" (it's not chubby it's literally just the same white girl with huge breasts and big ass and thighs)
Oh god the fear I get when someone I FOLLOW likes my writing is insane. It's happened twice now. It was horrifying. I'm being perceived. This is so spooky
hello! im here to thank you and to say that your fics are a breath of fresh air, really. i rarely find m!reader inserts and its even harder to find top reader fics. thank you for your work <3 (im also enamoured by pathetic boyfailures that need to be topped)
and may i ask, have you watched drive? if so, would you ever write something with driver? đ
AHHH TY!! That means a lot to me, so happy to hear u like my work đ
I unfortunately have not watched Drive, but it will certainly be put on my watchlist!
summaryââââ ben feels true love with you, his enemy, and finds himself able to break from the toxic masculinity he surrounded himself with.
pairingsââââ soldier boy / benjamin x anti-hero!male reader
warningsââââ nsfw content, porn with too much feelings, fluff, slight angst, foul language, probably (very definitely) ooc soldier boy, top!reader, sub!bottom!ben, gentle love, praise kink, hair pulling, creampie, fingering, unprotected sex, overstimulation, vibrator, pet names ( love, baby, pup, etc. ), short oral ( r. receiving ), love-making, mating press, missionary, riding, aftercare, light D/S dynamics, pillow talk, a lot of vulnerability, ben proposes to reader unexpectedly, enemies in forbidden love, internalised homophobia, morally grey!reader, possessiveness, homophobic slurs, canon typical misogyny, readerâs anti-hero name is lucifer, reader has magical powers
authorâs noteââââ i mightâve made him too soft and vulnerable, so forewarning that he doesnât show much of his asshole side in this fic. the ooc warning already says much, i guess?
MINORS DNI !!
Peaceful jazz music and well dressed crowd fills the grand hall decorated in gold curtains, men and women from different wealthy families flaunting around their riches with drinks in hand. Adorned in nothing but expensive attires that feeds off of the poor were most guests that have been invited to celebrate another success of Vought-American with a superhero movie that starred its own team, Payback, while the heroes themselves remained in their pretty little costumes for the publicity and fame.
Cameras, photographers, and journalists lurked in the corner section of the hall, where theyâve been assigned to fulfil their destiny of capturing significant moments that are interesting enough to be written on headlines or shown on television.
Nights like this were when Soldier Boy wanted to beat the shit out of Vought employees for their incapability in making celebrations entertaining. The lack of excitement and chaos infuse Ben with excessive boredom that just gives him the urge to shoot himself in the head, all of its professionalism becoming nothing but a burden and straight up pain in the ass. Heâs been hardly enjoying the night, having to put up with Crimson Countess attached to his hip at all times to keep appearances, which he admits is worse than fucking a loose cunt. It didnât make him feel better that Stan fucking Edgar was watching, making sure things are under control.
The jazz music suddenly stops short with a loud screeching sound that has everyone covering their ears in pain, startled murmurs filling the air as all eyes turned to the stage where a famous band stood, confusion also plastered across their faces. One of them repeatedly presses down on the pianoâs key, frowning when it does nothing as if it lost its function all of a sudden. Sensing the panic slowly rise among guests, Stan opens his mouth to speak, only for his words to die in his throat when the lights begin to flicker.
âYou know, Iâm quite displeased to not have received an invitation.â Deep, resonant, husky voice littered with confidence and cockiness erupt out of nowhere as the flickering lights return to normal, an utterly familiar figure making themselves known.
Gasps, of either excitement or fear, falls from everyoneâs lips to your powerful presence that almost immediately caused a shift in atmosphere. Soldier Boyâs breath hitched, feeling his throat dry as he cleared his throat and swallowed.
You donât miss the quick look of surprise and panic flashing across Stanâs face before they were hidden behind his casual mask of greedy businessman, making the corner of your lips twitch up.
âYouâre simply not welcome here, Lucifer.â The man uttered with barely contained irritation despite his best efforts to remain calm, spitting your antihero name â given by, not Vought, but the public themselves â in distaste.
Amusement emerge on your expression, completely unbothered by the antagonistic perspective Stan sees you with.
Thereâs an underlying overconfidence and arrogance to the way you hold yourself, a man who clearly knows how influential and threatening your own existence is and isnât even apologetic for it. It wasnât just for a show â you knew you mattered, knew exactly your worth, and didnât hide behind the fake persona of a beloved public figure that pretends theyâre enjoying a single bit of what theyâre doing. Your ego and pride seemingly rivals that of Soldier Boyâs yet yours come more naturally, like you were born with it without the need to develop them in amidst of your life to trick yourself into feeling more relevant. You held charisma, a charm that seems to pull people closer to you despite the dangerous, deceitful, fucking jackass attitude you had thatâs supposed to be driving them away. It makes Ben want to either punch your face or suck your cock like a fag whore.
âFair enough,â You shrugged. âBut I certainly make parties more fun. You could learn a couple or two from me.â
Stanâs eye twitches in annoyance at your arrogance; itâs much worse that he canât use anything to stomp on it because your ego wasnât fragile like the others. While most men, supe or not, wrap their self-importance in toxic masculinity in order to feel superior than they actually are, you were fully comfortable with yourself. Your emotional capacity was extremely high that developed you to become invincible against criticism or rejection. He can attempt to hurt your feelings, manipulate you, use your own ego against you all he wants â none of it will force you to surrender or submit no matter what because you, quite simply, loved yourself too much to be under power hungry maniacs.
When Stan canât seem to muster a snarky remark, you smirk and invite yourself in, walking further into the grand hall as you snap your fingers, the white bright lights turning into colourful disco lights with your magic.
You stared at the band members on stage, eyes glowing red, and forcefully overtake their minds to play an upbeat party worth music instead of the boring jazz they did. Itâs not that you dislike jazz music, itâs peculiar and beautiful on its own, youâre just not really fond of formal parties where everyoneâs required to be in their good behaviours, barely having the time of their life if not to shove their riches down less wealthy peopleâs throat, which you donât particularly find amusing or fun at all.
It seems to excite the guests, some of them even beginning to bop their heads to the catchy rhythm, moving their previously still bodies along with the beats. Energy surges through them, life revealing itself within their eyes that was filled with misery before you barged in.
âLet go of the fucking formality, ladies and gentlemen.â You grinned wide with your arms spread open to your sides. âItâs time for a true fun party!â
Ben was in awe when all cheered at your declaration, how quick you were able to turn this entire place into your own playground despite the hosts â authorities â being present, how much of a natural you were at gaining peopleâs faith and attention without doing more than show up and be yourself.
It should be making him envious; heâs doing all these heroism, model, actor bullshit and hiding behind a perfect macho-man façade to be loved and paid attention to for fuckâs sake, and yet itâs so easy for you to bend people at your own will just by being yourself. He should be pissed as he always did when others get the spotlight more than him, but Ben couldnât find it in himself to.
How the fuck is he going to be pissed when you look so disgustingly hot doing all of it?
âHeâs fucking doing it again,â Countess seethes through gritted teeth, glaring at you. Her little tug on his arm snaps him out of daze as he shifts his gaze to her. âTaking all the attention away from you. With the rate heâs going, I wouldnât be surprised if he interrupts everything youâre in.â
Ben had to pretend to irritably clench his jaw, and smiled with sarcasm. âAs if Iâd let him. Fucking asshole needs to be put in his place.â
He knew you heard him when the corner of your lips pulled up in a smirk, one of your brows raising to shoot him a challenging look. It sends a thrill down Benâs spine as he scowled, giving you a death glare that everyone sees for it is; rage, hatred, despise.
âPleasure to see you here, Soldier Boy. Crimson Countess.â You greet in a feigned enthusiasm, swiftly taking a cocktail from the waiter that just passed, and approach them in all your glory.
âFuck you,â Soldier Boy quickly snarled as Countess spits, âGet the fuck away from us.â
Amusement instantly cross your face, nearly making both of them want to punch you. âSo much for greeting lovebirds in clown costumes,â You dejectedly say with a hand over your chest for dramatic effect, in contrast to the mocking way in which you spoke. âCâmon, I just made this boring, useless party worth your precious little time. At least now you can stop being a pussy hiding behind an awfully constructed television personality.â
That strikes a nerve in Soldier Boy as his face hardened and a cold look appeared, stepping forward warningly, âIâd choose my next fucking words wisely if I were you.â Countess tugs his arm in a nervous manner while scanning their surroundings, taking notice of people watching your interaction.
You meet his glare with a calm yet daring look and leaned closer, âI wouldnât. I know I can beat you.â Your eyes glowed in red once again as you grinned confidently.
Benâs hand twitched, but before he could make a move, a woman approached you from behind and tugged on your elbow, interrupting the little rivalry you had going on. âIâm sorry, do you mind if we dance and have fun for a bit?â She shyly but bravely asked you, not even sparing Soldier Boy a glance.
An unimpressed look flashes in your eyes that only Ben took notice of, the subtle annoyance to the woman for cutting into your rather hostile conversation. You, however, plastered on an emotionless smile within a split second, not giving anyone the chance to see through you. âIâll lead the way,â You barely looked at him before walking off with her to the centre of the hall where bodies swayed to the beat.
It takes everything in Ben not to square up and make a mess of this party when you started dancing with her, your body dangerously close to hers as she stares at you with a look that made him want to strangle her slim neck. As if youâre a divine sculpture created by Gods, like youâre the entire universe, most precious being to ever exist in this planet, like she knew everything about you when she, in fact, absolutely did not. But he does.
And Ben knows heâll be screaming your name, holding you impossibly close to him, digging his nails onto your back as you grind into him â everything she wished youâll do to her â when all of this shit show is over.
At the end of the day, no slut or pussy fucker would come home to you but him; youâve chosen him despite the countless amount of people throwing themselves pathetically at you, and Ben will make sure heâll forever be the only one who does.
Lewd squelching, sucking sounds fill the dimly lit bedroom of your home as the stench of sex and arousal surround the air, more prominent due to your and Benâs enhanced senses. You sat comfortably against the headboard of your shared bed with Ben in between your legs as he sucks and slurps your cock, taking it as far as he can in his mouth and gagging. Tiny muffled moans or groans escape him occasionally, hips grinding against the mattress to stimulate his own aching dick while the vibrator you bought for him nestled deep inside his prepped hole.
âYou love my fuckinâ cock so much, donât you?â You chuckled hoarsely, almost degrading, and Ben shudders. âItâs alright, love. mânot goinâ anywhere.â Your fingers tread through his hair, gently scraping your nails against his scalp, making him groan as his hips stutter.
Maintaining eye contact with you, Ben inhales a deep breath through his nose before taking your cock further down his throat, tears gathering in his eyes when he nearly gagged. A genuine smile adorns your face when he looks at you expectantly, the most beautiful green eyes youâd ever seen holding desperation and self-doubt. Pleading expression that he shows only to you.
âYou want me to praise you, pup? Call you good boy?â He whines in response â God, that fucking sound you know heâd rather die than let anyone else hear. Ben doesnât have any idea how much it affects you, the fact that youâre the only one whom he allows a vulnerable side of him show.
Realising he has to earn what he yearns for, Ben gently wraps his hand around the base of your cock where it didnât fit and starts to bob his head. You moaned softly, throwing your head back; the sight being such a blessing to Benâs eyes that makes his own cock throb and needy. He swirls his tongue on the underside of your shaft, his free hand gripping your thigh for support.
âDoinâ so good, love. Youâve gotten better at this,â You cooed, petting his hair and gently thrusting up into his throat. Ben closed his eyes, a blissful look appearing on his face as he relaxed and allowed you to move instead.
The trust and faith Ben has in you makes something explode within your chest, heart swelling in love and adoration at your troubled yet adorable partner.
Building a healthy and trustful relationship with him was more difficult than anything youâve ever done before, considering the absolute bigotry his father forcefully fed into him and all the unresolved issues he had with himself. Despite the tough and harsh exterior he constantly put on, you had seen right through him when you first met â those broken spirit that yearned to be loved or needed by people hiding behind his douche, Soldier Boy persona, a man that his imbecile of a father always wanted him to be. It amused you as much as it squeezed your chest; one of the first strongest superhero being a fucking attention starved bastard was undeniably funny, but pitiful. Itâs also why you fell in love with him.
Youâve accepted that Ben was always going to have a deep rooted homophobia in him, that there wonât be a day where youâll be seen in the public with him holding hands like star-fucking-crossed lovers, that heâll always be too much of a pussy to be fully himself â but you never expected him to be so open, comfortable, with you like this to the extent of willingly trusting you with a needy and desperate version of himself.
Benjamin is laying his heart out bare for you to take, and you didnât know whether you wanted to make love to him or fuck his brains out. You decided with the former.
Confusion settles on Benâs expression when you gently pushed his shoulders to make him pull away, a sudden worry if heâs done something wrong, but all thoughts flies out the window after you passionately smashed your lips against his and guided him on your lap. Ben gasps when you pulled the vibrator out of his hole and replaced it with your thick fingers, hooking his arms on the back of your neck.
âSo good, love. Lookinâ all pretty for me.â He moans at your praise, the compliment making his heart flutter rather than boost his ego.
âsâfor youâŚâ They come out in whisper from his lips, littered with slight reluctance around the edge, but you hear it loud and clear. âAll for you. Iâ fuck⌠just for you,â He grinds on your fingers, crying out when you curled them just right to stimulate his prostate.
You almost feel dizzy for his words that heâs never uttered before.
The utmost pride he upholds made it difficult for Ben to completely submit to you, often being a disobedient brat that needs to be put in his place or a quiet, reserved man thatâs embarrassed to be loved by another man which causes him to be tense for the first half of this activity â so seeing him like this, hesitantly yet openly letting you in to his comfort zone, spilling the thoughts heâs always been fearful of admitting, holding you tight to him as if youâd slip from his grasp if he let you go, was pleasantly surprising. Your heart flutters, butterflies filling your stomach as the urge to protect and gently take him apart piece by piece runs like electricity through your veins, fuelling your desire for Ben.
You thrust your digits with gentle pace, Benâs hips moving on its own to chase the pleasure. âThatâs right, baby. All fâme, yeah? My pretty darling?â
The gentleness of your whispered voice and your eyes staring at him with pure love sends shivers down his spine; Ben holds your face and nods, pulling you in for a kiss. You can feel his suppressed fear through his desperate lips, the doubts that lingers in his mind that you might see him differently for being so vulnerable like this, and you quickly silence his thoughts by slipping your tongue inside his mouth.
Ben mewled when you add another digit in him, now having three fingers penetrating his hole, as he breaks the kiss to breathe for air. Thereâs a hazy look in his tearful eyes when he meets your gaze, âTake care of me, please.â
You groan at the plea, immediately pulling your fingers out to instead align your cock with his entrance. Ben mustâve been waiting for so long because he doesnât hesitate to sink down on it almost in an instant, a loud collective moan escaping the two of you. Your hands gripped his hips while he rested both hands on your shoulders, and fuck he felt so fucking good. The way his warm, tight velvety walls deliciously clamp around you as if swallowing your cock whole, the way his divinely beautiful body perfectly fit against yours like he was made for you.
âfuck⌠youâre so fuckinâ perfect,â You praised, kissing up his throat as he threw his head back in pleasure. âCompletely mine, so is Soldier Boy. Everythinâ about you, Ben. Itâs all mine.â
Ben nods vigorously, gripping the back of your neck and starting to ride you at a perfect pace, tiny sounds escaping his mouth. Slipping his fingers through your hair, he gently tugged on them just enough that had you groaning, and laid his forehead to rest against yours. âY-yours- ah⌠Yours as⌠as much as youâre fucking mine,â He grunts out, possessiveness hanging onto his every word that shot excitement through your body. âNo one gets to f-fucking have you⌠oh fuckâ!â He cuts himself off with a strangled moan when you snapped your hips up.
âYeah? Not even that slut that danced with me on the dance floor?â You teased, smirking.
His bright green eyes seem to darken as he sinks even further down on your cock, forcefully stretching himself out, hissing at the delicious pain. You moaned, wrapping an arm around him to pull him to your chest. âFuck, especially her.â Ben almost growls, one hand coming up to wrap around your throat, feeling you throb and seemingly get bigger inside him due to it. âYou⌠belong to me, o-only me.â
You hum, moaning softly when he squeezed your jugular just right. âAlways, my love.â
Relief washes over his entire body as he begins to roll his hips and move again, leaning down to suck and kiss on your exposed collarbone. âOh fuck⌠Itâsâ a-aghâŚ! Tell me- tell me, pleaseâŚâ He whined desperately.
Ben needed to hear you say it, have the promises of you completely belonging to him nailed into his brain so heâll never feel insecure or doubtful again. Heâll never admit it, but you always know every little thing that goes on inside his head, those haunting words of his father that seems to have a tight grip over him. Youâre the only one that could see right through his soul; someone exactly opposite from his father, someone who fearlessly challenges the normality or ancient traditions, someone who actually have their shit together that enabled you to be mature, wise, unapologetically yourself.
You were extraordinary in every way possible, and Ben knew his inner vulnerable â not quite the man his father wanted him to be â self was safe with you. Always secured. Never judged nor ridiculed, instead embraced perfectly by your strong and warm arms that shields him away from the mental, emotional harm.
He knew you would catch him when he falls. You would keep him and his treasured thoughts safe. You werenât afraid to love him loudly, wholeheartedly, and Ben allows himself to be brave just this once without thinking about his fears.
Trailing one of your hands up his nape, you pull him back to a searing kiss, pouring all the desire and love into it. Ben melted, his hand on your throat loosening as you gently twist your bodies around to lay him down on the bed without pulling out. He whimpers and chases you when you detached your lips from his, which nearly made your heart explode.
âI belong to you, my love.â You whispered, kissing down his neck and chest, thrusting your cock sensually slow inside him. Nothing quite like the animalistic sex you two usually have due to your powers, but it was more right than ever. âMy heart, my body, my soul, my spirit. All for you, belong with you.â
Ben feels as if his heart would hammer right out of his ribcage from how rapid it was beating.
Your soothing yet powerful presence all over the place, hovering over him and embracing every bit of the damaged part of himself that he refused to acknowledge. Thereâs resistance gnawing on his skin, the unhealthy urge to push you away and guard himself again with a thick wall despite being the one who willingly showed vulnerability, but Ben uses all of his ability to shove it down. He wanted to listen to your overwhelmingly romantic and gentle words that heâs been taught men should never utter, he wanted to be held with so much care like he was your most prized possession, he wanted to be actually loved. For once, he wanted to allow himself to not be drowned in the toxicity his father had force-fed him with.
It doesnât take you a second to notice him relaxing even further underneath your body, practically leaning onto your existence as the pretty noises escaping his mouth seems to gradually get louder, like he stopped holding himself back.
An awe surrounds your expression, genuinely taken aback by him letting everything go, and a soft sigh of pleasure falls from your lips. âThatâs it, baby. You make the most prettiest sound. Donât hold back,â Cooing gently, you adjust your hips and rolled into him, brushing his prostate at a perfect angle.
Ben keened, arching his back. âFuuuck⌠oh, please. Deeper.â
You obliged, keeping the same slow and sensual pace but pushing further inside. âYouâre made for me, arenât you? Just as Iâm made for you,â You sharply snap your hips once to emphasise, and he cries out. âWeâre one, my love. No one can have me, I come home to you and only to you no matter what.â
His breath hitched, the pleasure and your words sending explosions of euphoria into his brain, nodding mindlessly at your promises. âY-yes, fuck⌠Iâm- Iâm yours, tooâ ah, hngâŚâ Tears spill from his beautiful green eyes as he spread his legs more wide, one hand grabbing your wrist that was propped beside his head to stabilise your body, almost clinging onto you while the other scratched against the mattress. âF-fucking Christ, always- always yours.â
âI know,â You softly acknowledged. âAlways mine, no matter how much some part of you canât accept it. I can see right through you, love. I understand everything about you.â
âI- oh yes! There, fuck!â Ben sobs when you start picking up your pace, hips bucking against you. âY-you do⌠God, you a-always fucking do.â
That causes a grin to spread across your lips before you leaned down to devour him again.
Truth be told, Ben was afraid of how much you saw everything heâs been trying to hide all his life. It takes a bit of his soul every-time he learns to be indifferent, more sick and twisted. The innocence in him had died out long ago, but the desperation of a child never vanquished â the pathetic, ruined and heavily deprived of any love someone that he always forced himself to forget or get rid of, was seen entirely by you without much effort. He didnât need to say anything, you always understood all the hidden insecurity, longing, pain, and fear nested deep in his mind. You also understood why he was the way he was, why he does what he does, who he had to become.
To be loved is to be seen and understood, he guesses.
A love heâs never thought heâll ever experience from anyone, let alone his supposed enemy. You gave it to him, though. All so willingly, happily, like he was meant for it, like he was always meant for you.
Strangled, loud moan was forced out of him when your hand wrapped around his achingly hard dick, making him feel dizzy from all the overwhelming desire and pleasure. Every bit of love that emits from your touch sends a frying electricity through his veins, fulfilling his inner thirst that was supposed to be unquenchable.
âFuck, fuckfuckfuckâ!â Ben wails, arching his back and digging his nails on your forearm as your thumb rubbed his sensitive slit and smeared precum all over. âC-close⌠oh, Christ! Cumminâ, cumminâ, pleaseââ
âItâs alright, Ben. I got you,â You purred, slamming your hips down on him. âLet go, cum for me.â
As if thatâs all the permission he needed, Ben instantly tumbles over the edge with a loud breathy whine as his eyes rolled to the back of his head, sticky loads shooting out from his cock to his stomach. Body spasming and head thrown back, letting his mind-blowing orgasm wave right off of him, still clinging onto you. You gritted your teeth when his hole tightened impossibly around you, feeling yourself throb and ache to release.
Ben â in spite of his cloudy, mushed state of mind as well as hazy and cock-drunk look in his eyes â suddenly wraps both strong legs around your hips to keep you in place, which forces you forward to bury yourself deeper inside him, eliciting a growl of curses from you.
His mouth splits into a dumb, shit-eating grin. âInside, baby. Fill me up⌠give me all you got. I need you.â He moves his hips and squeezes down like a fucking expert prostitute, and itâs enough to have you let out a guttural groan as you spilled inside his tight hole.
Ben released a shattered breath, moaning delightfully at your warm cum that taints his insides, his hand that was gripping your forearm moving down to caress his belly where he could feel you finishing.
It makes your breath hitch; the action sparking a deep hidden desire and possessiveness within you that youâve had shackled for so long in order to not be too greedy.
But Ben, oh your precious Benjamin, pressed down on his perfect belly and whined so brokenly that tugged the strings of your heart, as if he wanted something so unreachable. He attempts to bury his face on the pillow in what you recognised as shame and you quickly hold his face to keep him from hiding from you, subtle concern glimmering in your gentle eyes.
âWhatâs bothering your mind, love?â You whispered with such carefulness, afraid speaking too loud would break the bubble of sensitivity that surrounded the two of you as you pressed a light kiss on his temple. âYou can tell me, Benji. Itâs not embarrassing nor shameful.â
Benâs heart swells at the way you cage him in your protective arms and words, the back of his eyes stinging from the tears that threatened to come out. He doesnât deserve you; he never did, but youâre so good to him and he doesnât think he can live without you. No, he knows he canât live without you.
What would he do without your captivating eyes looking at him with so much passion no one ever gave him before, your gentle voice uttering such carefully crafted words that embraces rather than cut through him, your big and muscular yet warmly protective arms holding him like he was a treasure to behold, your soul healing and rebuilding every damaged bit of his spirit like it was your purpose? What would he do without you?
And fuck, everything would be so much easier if he wasnât a fucking man. If he wasnât such a pussy whoâs afraid of risking everything.
You gently roll your hips against his, slow and steady, as if to comfort his nerves and overthinking thoughts with a soft pleasure.
Letting out a quiet, breathy sigh, Ben holds your face close and internally fights back against the restraints that wanted to keep him from opening his soul up to you. âWeâd be⌠Weâd be so much happier if I wasnât a fucking man,â His whispered voice breaks at the end.
His heart ached and so did yours, a realisation dwelling on you of how serious Ben actually was with your relationship. It comes off as an unexpected admittance. While you knew he did love you like you love him, you didnât think it was to this extent of imagining the countless possibilities if either of you was a woman instead, much less heâd think of himself to be the woman. It was odd and so unlike him â true love brings out something within people, you suppose.
Tears glimmered in his green eyes thatâs filled by storm of emotions.
Ben hated this, hated you for making him such a crybaby and a pussy, but heâs so in love with you it fucking hurts. He doesnât know what triggered him to be an annoying, pathetic, insecure loser the moment you held him. God, heâs Soldier Boy for fuckâs sake!
Then, you look at him with so much tenderness like he hung the moon and was the only thing that grounds you down to earth, and Ben realises itâs this.
âYouâre such a fucking fool,â You affectionately cursed with a tone barely above whisper before pressing a lingering kiss on his lips. âI wouldnât have spared you a glance if you werenât. Women never captivated me, love. Only you.â
Wrapping his arms around your back and burying his face on the crook of your neck, Ben inhales your scent as you gently rock your bodies together. âLove me more,â He almost demands, voice low and trembling.
You smiled, âOf course, Benji.â
Pressing a sweet kiss on his head, you grab the back of his thighs and push them to his muscular chest, Benâs flexibility despite his well defined physique making it easier for you to fold him. In a swift motion, you slam down on him, beginning to pound away the loud thoughts that made home in his mind. Angelic, high pitched sounds escape Benâs mouth with each rough thrusts, bordering on pornographic. The blissful look across his face enhance his already ethereal features, and you canât help but stare intently at him.
âYou look so beautiful like this, love. Taking me in so well, letting me cherish you.â You praised, earning a needy whimper from the love of your life. âMy Benjamin⌠my brave soldier.â
At the unexpected pet name, Benâs body jolts and a choked sob erupted from his throat, suddenly pushed over the edge as he cums undone on his stomach. âF-fuck!â
âG-god, babyâŚâ You groaned, shuddering in pleasure at the way his gummy walls spasms around your girth. âDrivinâ me insane, yâknow that? Cumminâ with just my words alone? Shit, wanna fuck you hard and love you at the same time.â
Digging his nails on your back, Ben attached his lips on your collarbone with an intent to leave several possessive marks, making you jut your hips forward. âD-do it, fuck me.â He mumbled breathlessly.
Thatâs the only permission you needed to let go of your own self-control and just rut into him like an animal, thrusting your cock with more vigour and roughness that forced the headboard to repeatedly bang against the wall. Feeling the way your shaft practically drill into and rearrange his guts that brought immeasurable ecstasy, Ben finds himself finally unable to make out a coherent thought as drools drip down his chin. The two orgasms you milked out of him already left him sensitive enough, his thighs quivering under your grasps.
Lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin and wet squelches filled the room, accompanied by feral noises of both of your moans and grunts.
Itâs nearly incomprehensible how youâre able to quickly switch between loving him and treating him like a slut next, a perfect balance to Benâs constant yearning for admiration or appreciation and his tendency to always be an inconsolable brat that needs to be put back in his place.
He feels so complete and whole, so loved. And so so fucking dumb for your cock. He could stay like this forever without heavy expectations weighing over his head all the time, just taking you whole and letting you ruin his body, looking all pretty and beautiful for you. Yeah, he can do that. Being pretty and sexy has always been a talent of his, after all. He can even learn to cook for you like a fucking perfect, pretty housewife, maybe youâll stuff him full of your cum again while at it and tell him to keep them in. Fuck, he can do that too. He wants to do that.
âOh fuck, BenâŚâ An almost pornographic, low growl rumbles from your chest when he squeezed down on you, his warm walls fluttering against your girth from the imagination. The coil in your stomach tightens as you twitched inside him, too close to your high.
âI- ahâ! Please, pleasepleaseâ!â He babbles, one hand shifting to press your ass and push you in deeper, syllables slightly slurred from how cockdrunk he was.
Understanding his wordless signal, you increase your pace with an angle that drives your instincts wild, a chill running through your spine from the overwhelming pleasure. Seeing Ben completely fall apart and surrender underneath you gives your ego an infinite boost, the powerful man such a sobbing, wrecked, pretty little mess just because of your cock. Drunk in every little euphoria and precious love you feed him. Oh, how fucking adorable and gorgeous he was.
Before long, Ben feels you throb inside him and pulls you in with what little willpower he had left, clumsily slipping his tongue in your mouth, overwhelming you with different sensations of his body against yours. Itâs enough to have you harshly ram your hips down in one swift motion and empty yourself inside him, a loud wail of your name leaving Benâs lips as he finishes as well. You feel his body tremble violently due to overstimulation, breath stuttering.
âYou look so fucked out,â You laugh breathlessly, hips softly grinding to ride out your climax. âStill fuckinâ hot when youâre all dumb nâ mindless.â
Petting his disheveled hair, a soft contented hum leaves Ben as he closed his eyes and nuzzled to your touch. The entire erotic sight of his hair sticking to his forehead from the sweat, tears staining his cheeks, hazy look across his eyes, and swollen lips sends amusement and satisfaction through your veins â you definitely fucked whatever self-loathing thoughts heâs had out of his head.
Having completely spilled inside him, you moved to pull out only for Ben to groan in protest. âStay the fuck in,â He grumbled, panting to catch his breath.
âI need to clean us up, love.â You gently say, but kept yourself sheathed inside him as your lips attach to his neck. âWanna take care of you properly.â
Ben quietly sighs in content, âYou already do.â Before he tilts his head to capture you in a passionate kiss. You slowly pull out of him in amidst of the moment, holding his face and reciprocating with equal passion.
He breathes low and heavy when you start to wipe him up with a wet towel you magically conjured up, running it across his body gently as your other hand massaged his sore hip with such tenderness. Your eyes taking in every part of his physique feels much more innocent now compared to before, deep appreciation and subtle awe flashing across your irises the more you stare, which causes his cheeks to tint slightly. You find it adorable how shy or embarrassed he gets whenever you look at him like heâs something born out of the stars in contrast to the overinflated cockiness he displays when others compliment him; it just proves he feels different, more special with you.
You shoot him a gentle smile that makes his brain shut down and his heart jump.
Christ on a cross, just what did you fucking reduce him into?
âWill you marry me?â The words had left his mouth before he could even process.
You froze, eyes wide as you snapped your gaze to him at the same time his own widened in shock. Fuck, did he just say what he thinks he did? After you fucked him âtil he couldnât even speak properly? God, his legs feel wobbly after all that delicious pounding of your dick in his tight littleâ
His distracting thoughts were interrupted by your hands cupping his cheeks and forcing him to look at you. Thereâs a bit of doubt lingered across your expression, worried that you mistakenly heard him, and Benâs gaze softened. âWill you marry me?â He repeats quietly this time with genuine emotion, wiping away your worry.
Excitement and happiness seem to explode within you as you beam; âYes! Fuck, yes, Iâll marry you.â However, your smile slowly deflates and a foreign look of insecurity replaces the joy surrounding you. âAre you⌠are you sure? Youâre not pushing yourself?â
Confusion spreads across his face, âWhy would you think I am?â
âItâs just not that easy to break away from all the homophobia, love.â You softly remind him. âYouâre still having a hard time accepting it, could barely even call yourself the right term. Youâre afraid, and thatâs fine. We can continue on like this. You donât have to marry me because you feel obligated to.â
Ben frowns, his hand pulling you down to the mattress at his side as he props up on his elbow and stares at you incredulously. âYou think I wanna fucking marry you just âcause Iâm guilty about hiding this? Did it ever occur to you that I actually fuckinâ love you?â
You smile to yourself; what a long way it took for him to just be able to admit that. At least heâs letting himself know he can be vulnerable with you now, compared to when he was convinced youâll despise his inner self â a big fucking pussy, he says â and completely shut himself off in the beginning.
âHey,â He grabs your chin to make you pay attention. âI know I still donât do enough to show you, but I do. I really fucking do, baby.â
You look into his captivating green eyes for a second before releasing a deep breath, âI know. Trust me, you donât have to do enough to show it, I can already tell. And I love you too.â
Ben nods and kisses your lips, lying down beside you. Your hand instinctually attaches to his waist, caressing his soft skin and shooting warmth throughout his body.
He canât help but stare at your features, the way you look different now from how you looked at the party you crashed earlier. A certain amount of coldness, hostility and displeasure usually lurked your expression in a daily manner â hidden behind the undeniable charisma and obnoxious arrogance â directed at others that told exactly what their worth to you was; nothing. Ben hasnât seen a day you were even remotely pleased by someone in the long years of knowing you, the people who attempted to get in your good graces often ended up screwing everything up instead and irritating you enough to kill them off.
But with him, you wouldnât even spare him a cold glance. Your gaze twinkling with a pleasant spark, always warm, always comforting, always proud. God forbid you look at him with hatred like youâre supposed to. So affectionate for a man whoâs been named after the Devil by the idiotic public that only sees what you let them see.
It is then had Ben realised; to him, true love is you.
True love is when you embrace a part of him that he deems undesirable, mend his broken soul, and melt the ice of deep rooted trauma surrounding his heart â it is when Soldier Boy doesnât drive you away from seeing Benjamin, an ordinary boy from South Philadelphia who desperately wanted to make his father proud. You see them as one, as equally significant parts of him.
Good fucking Lord, he was a gigantic imbecile if he didnât want to marry you, even if the idea still makes him feel quite⌠odd. Fuckâs sake, he really needs to learn how to deal with this homophobia bullshit, doesnât he?
Ben licks his lips anxiously, reluctance plastered on his face. âI⌠I actually got the rings,â He hesitantly admitted.
Your eyes widened. âYou did?â
âI- Jesus Christ, of course I did! I know I donât fucking do shit like that, okay?â He snapped before quietly muttering, âJust wanted you to believe me when I propose.â
âI do,â You donât miss to give him comfort, grabbing his hand. Benâs nerves soothes at your touch. âI just thought we still have a long way to go and you need more time to figure yourself out.â
He shakes his head, âGotta claim you before some fucker decides youâre free for them.â
âYeah?â You smirked, raising one eyebrow. âCouldâve gone with a collar, yâknow. It would get your point straight across. Plus, itâs more visible.â Tapping your neck to emphasise, which made Ben swallow.
Yeah, youâll look good with a collar in his colour. You can even wear both. Thatâll definitely get his point across to anyone that even looks at you. Maybe next time, he decides.
A mischievous smirk spreads across his lips, âThatâll fucking work best. Think I could put a leash on you too?â He teased, letting out a chuckle and sliding his hand up to your neck and hold you there.
âMhm, fuck yes,â You almost purred from how pleased you were at the idea.
Ben laughs, lightly squeezing your neck in affection before turning around to rummage through the cabinet on the side of your bed, pulling out a velvet box thatâs in the shade of his green. You could tell he was enthusiastic and overwhelmed with emotions from the way his hands slightly trembled, though you made no mention of it to avoid bursting his adorable bubble.
His grin was as bright as the sun on a sunny day when the ring perfectly fits around your finger, already snuggling comfortably on your skin and bringing a weight of new purpose in life. You slip the other ring on his as well, feeling the entanglement of your destiny with one another, the red strings of fate on both of your pinky fingers thickening. Itâs a sacred oath that ties you to each other forever.
Warmth spreads around your chest at the fact itâs his first time giving you a gift and itâs something so unexpectedly intimate. A silver engagement ring with a ruby in his shade of green and his name engraved on the inner side; practically a part of his soul, settling itself home around your finger. You shift your gaze to the one he wears â the same silver ring but with a dark red ruby instead, your signature colour, and you assume also have your name engraved on the inner side as well.
A big, significant step for a man whoâs constantly afraid of what others think about him, and you couldnât be more prouder.
Lying back down on the bed together, Ben turns his back on you and scoots closer to your chest, making you smile when he grabbed your wrist to pull your arm over his torso. He always loved being hugged by you from behind despite the fact heâll never admit it out loud; as much as it sounds pathetic and unmanly, he doesnât argue with himself of how it gives him safety and protection from the harsh judgmental world. Being in your arms always dissipated the cruel words of his father carved in his mind.
You gently pulled him closer to your body and pressed a kiss on his shoulder blade. âDonât have to rush about coming out, love. Itâll take more than a simple courage to be open about something considered taboo by our society. Youâre still dealing with personal issues, weâll focus on that for now.â
Benâs heart warms at your consideration, unable to resist the urge to stick to you like a glue as he leans back on your chest. âHow the fuck did you do it? This feels like a pain in the fucking ass,â He muttered disdainfully, though there was a hint of willingness in his tone, like heâs willing to make an effort just for you.
You shrugged, âmânot exactly shaped by my childhood trauma, Benji, and I didnât like my parents that much. Never really gave a fuck about somethinâ that has no benefit to my life whatsoever.â
âEntitled asshole,â He laughs.
âSo are you,â You teased, making you both erupt in loud laughter.
I could get used to this, Ben thinks as genuine happiness glows bright in his heart, your love anchoring him and providing a solid land for him to stand on. Dealing with his own problems doesnât sound so bad when youâre there for him every step of the way. With your protective arms around his body, both Soldier Boy and Benjamin knew their heart will always be safe with you.
For once, Ben believes he can finally learn to create a family of his own.
Until disaster struck and life suddenly decides to not be fair on someone as fucked up as him â ripping his world apart into shreds in the form of coward, betraying bastards known as his fucking teammates.
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I will never forgive Project Hail Mary for indoctrinating me into the cult of finding Ryan Gosling attractive. All my life I heard the word of how hot and desirable Ryan Gosling is. All my life I didnât see it, denied it. All my life I had the assurance I was not prey to mass delusion. There just, wasnât anything remarkable there. And then they just fucking throw some glasses and cardigans on this man and make him sad and cowardly and I fold. All I think about now is Ryan Gosling bouncing and crying on it. It being? Whatever have you. A rock dildo. Markiplier. Any penile like object this pathetic little man is in the vicinity of. I should be killed.