Breathing Because of Grace

Throughout my early teenage years, I used to take a walk through a shortcut by the railroad tracks in order to get to the Public Library and Tim Hortons in a timely manner. On a gloomy day, the entrance would appear ominous and spooky. The trees would all be lined up almost as if they were guarding the passage. As soon as you would enter the dense forest, your feet would sink into the  charcoal…

I’m very thankful to have experienced so much healing in such a short time in the deepest parts of my soul. The losses of this year did not cause me to lose my faith. The shaking that life brought to the foundation of my soul did not cause shifting. I stood on the the rock ( 2 Samuel 22:2). As a result, I stood firm despite significant loss and confusion.

I can remember thinking on New Year’s Day that I thought I would have a growth season. I had no idea that the growth would start immediately or that I would be dealing with grief in the beginning of the year. The collection of information about strokes, physiotherapy, senior homes and non-verbal communication will maybe one day prove invaluable. To be honest, the research process helped me to process the swirling emotions running through my heart and mind. There was a lot of chaos and confusion that tried to distract me. The despair would have sucked me in when I saw the changes in grandpa, if my heart wasn’t rooted in God’s truth. The time with grandpa in his hospital room and with the rest of the family was so precious. Words cannot express how much we all grew closer in the midst of the trial. We came together and supported each other. There were many tears. Yet, throughout the heartache and the constant emotion we somehow managed to stand strong as a united front. I miss him all the time. I cherish the memories and try to remember that he wants me to live life to the fullest. Somehow knowing he is proud of what I accomplished this year makes it hurt less that I didn’t get my Christmas hug this year. All in all, the beginning of this year brought with it stretching. I am glad I was there for my family and I am grateful they were there for me. We were all stretched but we didn’t break.

Looking at my arrival to Kindersley, located here in the Praries, I see now that I had no idea of how different my life would be out of the city. I went from driving cars to driving pickup trucks. I learned about farming and how to feed pigs. I learned the difference between farm clothes and dress clothes. I especially learned to dress in layers because weather in Saskatchewan is unpredictable. At the start of my journey from June till now, I have truly come to embrace Kindersley as my community. From quick chats with strangers in grocery stores to learning how to plug in my car for winter and warm it up… I have truly started to embrace this small town lifestyle.

Camp season brought many amazing memories and I’ll never forget my first muddy day. I made friends and attended bonfires and learned that it’s okay to not know how to do everything. We are all a team, a family with unique giftings and personalities. We each have our own strengths and we are there for each other. My family has grown and I’m blessed to invest into so many lives here. I’m especially blessed by their investment. I love the kids I get to work with and I can’t wait till I can do it full-time. They are another investment that this year has brought. I look forward to a new year investing into the families of Kindersley.

The new man in my life is another one of the blessings I’ve been given in 2017. After grief comes joy. Once I allowed myself to open my heart to love and joy, I truly began to see this man and all he has to offer. He makes me laugh and his embrace causes my heart to be still when I’m anxious. His smile makes me quiver and tingle and I’m always excited when I get to hear him talk about his passions. He took me to the Sandhills and I was able to feel comfortable to face my fear of heights ( without him even knowing I was afraid). He makes me want to be a better woman and to be a woman of dignity, strength, integrity and loyalty. He truly brings something special to my life here in Kindersley. This Christmas with him was something truly a blessing. I am looking forward to discovering more about each other in 2018.

You have been a year of many trials and many blessings. I’ve grown and I’ve learned some valuable lessons. I’ve built trust with many people and I’ve seen that relationship is a two way street. Generosity is not a comparison game. To give to others ought to be natural when we see how much God gives us. He gave us his son and he continues to bless us with all we need, even in the desert places. Grief is not instant. It can stagger and it can come in waves. With every aftershock, more pain is released and more joy can be acquired. Peace is not a feeling it is a state of being. This year I have seen an abundance of provision as I have been in the waiting room. God is good and He is faithful. His timing is not ours and nor should it be. He takes everything and uses it for His glory. Nothing is wasted. Praise God!

So this New Year, take time and thank God for the blessings He has given to you. Revel in His goodness and in His love. Remind yourself He is working in your waiting. Trust that He is moving on your behalf and see that He is not a distant God. Take time this new year to put him as a priority in your life and watch what He will do with the time you give Him.

I’m blessed and expectant for this New Year. Blessings to you all!

Chantal

The tail lights in the dark amid the exhaust was a familiar sight.

You were off to your next adventure leaving me behind.

Did you ever look in your rearview before you hit the gas?

Did you ever ask yourself ‘Why am I leaving this time just like the last?’

You always said I’ll be back and we will have longer next time around.

I didn’t believe you then and I certainly see why now.

You were always leaving and you never knew when you’d return.

I was a fool for loving the gypsy in you and it’s a hard lesson to learn.

I realize now that I wasn’t ever going to be enough for you to stay.

Computer Malfunction. Trauma Detected.

It doesn’t seem like there are any words to describe the shock one’s system can go through. First, your breathing becomes a task that requires focus. Once that is under control then the heartbeat syncopation must slow. The spiral of information, firing of neurons and the memories are overloading the brain’s processing center. Chaotic interruption creates a difficulty in processing the…

I hope you all have been enjoying your summer! I am happy to say that here at iKids Camp we have enjoyed ourselves. Children here have been too busy to be bored. We have built forts, played in the sprinkler, and explored our superhero potential. We have enjoyed healthy snacks, as well as, discovered some fun crafts and new art mediums. Our mini superheroes and beaded butterflies (seen below) were just two examples of the kids getting their creative juices flowing.

Beaded Butterflies

We have participated in many awesome group activities and games that have taught us about teamwork and cooperation. We participated in relay races, soccer, Pacman, line tag, Spud, and Frisbee to only name a few. We challenged the children to try new games and sports, and especially enjoyed teaching the children Spikeball. We tested our athletic ability!

  We have been actively enjoying new forms of exercise. This past month we learned how to dance and we had fun with mini competitions. We got our groove on with Just Dance and we learned that we can all encourage each other and cheer each other on. Everyone had fun being the best version of themselves they could be.

“ Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!”- Dr. Seuss

Our staff have actively been encouraging your children to see that they have unique talents, skills, and abilities that they can offer the group. We have learned we are stronger together. We have enjoyed our camp songs especially the Bungalow song. We have done yoga, dance, sports, water games, slime making, nerf gun wars, and much more. I can honestly say we have truly stayed physically active this summer!

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My goal for camp this summer was to teach and encourage your children to discover what makes each of them extraordinary. I believe through all the various activities, lessons, movies, and games we have helped your children to have an extraordinary summer and learn more about how awesome each of them truly are. It has been a summer full of fun, intrigue, creativity, mess, and lots of laughter!

  I am honoured to have had the opportunity to spend the summer with your children. It has truly been a blast!!!! Please email me at [email protected] with any questions, or if you’d like to know more about what’s coming up in the fall. Looking forward to making more memories and having new adventures this year at iKids Club. It will take place here at KCF every Thursday night from 6-8PM. It will be $5 per child and we will have a variety of special events and activities for your children.

It’s going to be a busy and fun-filled year!

      Best regards,

Chantal McDougall iKids Camp Director [email protected]