i still dream of Orgonon

Maybe if we Ran away with Carly Rae Jepsen in 2015 none of this would have happened

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

I hate Elon musk so fucking much

I lowkey hate when programs talk to me in a friendly way. "don't worry, nearly there!" Shut up. It should say "loading 64.3% completed. Do not turn off device" and absolutely nothing else. You arent my friend you are computer. Act like it

i know all advertising is evil but there's something a little offputting about the sign in the dispo that says "make moments walking the dog matter" you need to smoke weed in order to walk your dog?

i still think about the fucking quesadilla terf

getting older and weirder and sexier and more perverted and gluttonous and intelligent and blunt and eloquent and spontaneous and skilled is literally what it's all about

big life tips dont be neurodivergent dont be poor dont get in any sort of situation and dont let yourself need or crave

harsh words from one of the muppet babies