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yeah idc what you guys think i dont even fucking know you anyways so ha
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@lithified
resistandxist:
The Distillers - sick of it all
yeah idc what you guys think i dont even fucking know you anyways so ha

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when i go, i will stay long gone
Reblog if you enjoy 100%, completely platonic threads.
I do not always go alone to the bottom of myself. / I drag more than one live being with me. / I extinguish the light in their eyes. / I make friends with great depths.
Jules Supervielle, tr. by Ian Seed, from “A Poet,”
(by ▲ r n o)

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illota:
@lithified
So fuckin’ cold…
He can’t feel his fingers as he holds a black cigarette to his lips, strikes at his lighter one, two, three times. When it catches, he inhales. Nicotine floods his system and he almost feels good… for a second.
It’s later than he’d like, but it wasn’t like he was going to sleep much anyway. Must be a little after three in the morning. A quick glance at the glowing screen of his phone (a newer purchase: his old flip finally died and it wasn’t like he didn’t have the money to spare) confirms the suspicion. 3:16. He’s supposed to be done by 3:45, so he might be cutting it close, but it’s no skin off his back. The usual team works around him when they have to.
The message icon catches his eye and on a whim, he taps. He doesn’t text much anymore; there’s not a lot of people that want to bother with him. He does have one familiar name saved, though. And the owner is probably still up, despite the hour.
[ MSG: bsj ] need a fuckin vacation
It’s quick - he doesn’t waste any more than a few seconds on it before stowing the whole thing away. Another drag, and then he grinds the end of the cigarette into the brick wall next to him. Just enough to get rid of the embers and put it out, and then he pops open the breast pocket of his jacket, pops it inside.
And then he reaches into the waistband of his pants and pulls out his pistol. It’s hard to see the details in the halflight of the exit door, but he inspects it for detritus and makes sure that it’s loaded. As he pops the cartridge back in, he leans into the door and takes a step inside. While it closes behind him, he taps the brick he’d used to prop it open back into place with his foot.
The whole shebang takes less time than he’d anticipated. The guy begs for his life, sure, but is smart enough to realize that it’s getting him nowhere. He quiets down for the last part - the part where SeLin reads him his list of transgressions and then puts the gun to his skull. The part where he pulls the trigger.
The silence that follows is almost serene. Then the alarm on his phone goes off and he quiets that, too. The walk downstairs is short, interrupted only by a quick nod as a man and woman pass him in the hall. They’re wearing paper booties and gloves, each toting a black backpack over one shoulder.
After he slips back out the door, he lights up again and starts walking. No need to hang around. In a rare moment of thought, he decides to send another message. It’s been such a long time since they’ve had the conversation, he isn’t so sure that his pal will remember it. It’s just a spark of interest, perhaps because of the mess he’s just made.
[ MSG: bsj ] did u call ur fuckin mom yet
It’s been a long night.
He’d been out for hours. Haunting the seediest of Seoul’s backstreets, cutting deals with junkies and murderers and thieves. Just another night, for him. He’s used to it. He’s sick of it. He’d called it quits before he should have, really, but the threat of a disappointed boss has long since lost its sway over him.
Fuck that guy.
The rest of his supply is hidden away, in the bedside drawer that held his own stash, once upon a time. And with it, the stolen army-issued Daewoo 9mm that’s been fired exactly once. And Sungjoon -- Sungjoon who would like nothing more than to never have to think of either of these things again -- he’s restless, smoking his way through a pack of Reds in front of a shitty TV set.
For hours, the only sound in the apartment has been a voice droning on in accented English. Bear Grylls, Sungjoon’s go-to binge-watching choice. The subtitles are off (they make him read, they make him think) so he only understands most of it -- enough that he’s steadily growing his reserve of survival tips, enough that he can lose himself in fantasies of being self-sufficient and utterly alone out in the vast wilderness. He’s so detached from the dreary apartment around him that his phone vibrating comes as a genuine shock. Who would even text him these days? The possibilities are a little unnerving, so when he snatches it up and sees the sender, he sinks back into the cushions with a sigh of relief.
[ MSG: 병신 ] if that ain’t a fucking mood [ MSG: 병신 ] i’ve needed one for like 5 years
And god, it’s true. The longer he stays trapped in this hopeless cycle (restless sleep and waking only to move a product he craves so badly it chokes the life right out of him) the more intolerable it gets. And there’s no way out, and he knows this, but the closer he gets to the end of his rope the more inclined he is to make one.
The next text is just about the last thing he would’ve expected, but it doesn’t irk him as much as it probably should. Selin is obnoxious, but sometimes -- sometimes it seems like the kid might actually care.
[ MSG: 병신 ] nah... i have no idea how i’d even reach her. she could still be in istanbul, she could’ve gone home, she could be fucking anywhere [ MSG: 병신 ] my grandma might know...
I can feel a better version of me somewhere in there — hidden behind a liver or attached to a bit of spleen within my stunted, childish body — telling me to: get up, do something, grow up, move on.
Gillian Flynn, Dark Places
And he took me to the river Where he slowly let me drown
Sultan Qaboos Grand Mosque, Oman
Aidan Moesby

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Nine inch Nails || Leaving Hope
@ksung said: ❀
↳ send me ❀ for an aesthetic moodboard representing our muses’ relationship.
sᴜɴɢɢʏᴜ & sᴜɴɢᴊᴏᴏɴ
What can you know about a person? They shift in the light. You can’t light up all sides at once.
Richard Siken, Portrait of Fryderyk in shifting light
olumleasik:
There are a million other faces flashing in his mind. None of them quite line up with this guy, and none of them involved busking - until they do.
Not quite two weeks ago, maybe a week and a half, he’d been scouting around and had come upon a street performer. Sixty percent leg, dark hair, looking a little disheveled. This guy.
The wallet he’d pulled from the performer in the park had been a little heftier than the norm, but he learned about three-quarters of the way home that it was because it didn’t contain a license, but a passport. Very unique around here. There were stamps from quite a few countries but only a little bit of cash. He almost felt bad for throwing it out. Probably a lot of memories there.
As soon as he remembers the details, he realizes how, exactly, this guy would’ve figured out where he lives without knowing anything about him.
“You were in the business too, huh?”
He feels his jaw clench, unclench, settle, multiple times as he tries to figure out his next course of action. He’s always been good at thinking on his feet, but after a long day it gets a little hard.
“Not anymore, though. You would’ve known better.”
There’s no lying his way out of this one. They’re in too deep.
A quick survey of the situation tells him that most of his belongings have been touched in some fashion. Most of them are in almost exactly the same spot, but there are a couple of things that are too far out of place to go unnoticed. This man feels… oddly secure. He’s sure of himself.
Yongsoo squints. Guy’s got something hidden, either on his person or somewhere in the apartment. Gotta be a weapon. He just doesn’t know where.
“Sorry about that, by the way. Hard times and all that, you already know.” He tries to listen for any kind of sound that would indicate another person hiding in the next room, but there’s just him and this guy, squaring off with just a couch between them. “This is a little awkward, but I ditched your wallet last week. I’m sure you could fish it out of the dumpster or something; trash day is tomorrow.”
He offers a smile, a nonchalant shrug.
“Or you could get a new one.”
Anger is what carried him this far and it's what will see him through to the end. It doesn't falter, only makes way for mild surprise at how quickly Yongsoo figured it out. Yes, in what feels like another lifetime, Sungjoon was a pickpocket himself. A mess of a seventeen-year-old who decided living on the streets was preferable to a foster home or whatever the fuck they did with kids whose parents were crazy or dead. His friend Samal got caught first -- arrested as summer turned to fall and the crowds of tourists thinned along İstiklal Avenue. Sungjoon never saw him again. Another friend had him hooked and dealing before the year was out.
"It's a stupid fucking way to make a living." Said the pot to the kettle. Sungjoon doesn't give a fuck. "Yeah, really, I should've known better. Should've told you to fuck off the second I realized you'd been waiting for me." Hindsight and all. It hardly matters now.
Because Yongsoo is actually telling him where to find it. It spikes his annoyance a little higher, the mention of a dumpster, the careless way he relates this fact, but at least it's something.
He finishes with a smile and a flippant comment that makes Sungjoon want to knock his teeth in. He doesn't move a muscle.
"Show me where."
He’s sure the kid didn't expect this. He probably thought Sungjoon would quail at the prospect of digging through trash. He doesn't understand that Sungjoon has no intention of letting this go until he gets what he came for.
Everything he came for.
markie

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DATING DIVERSION
Strengths
(85.7%) Intelligence - Your sharp intellect is a valuable asset. Use your intelligence wisely; avoid condescension. Quiet, confident intelligence is very attractive. (71.4%) Varied Interests - You don't limit yourself, and that's a dating asset. Your varied interests make you available and interesting to a wider range of men. (66.7%) Adventurousness - You are willing to try new things and be spontaneous. You want to get out there and really live, and you will attract people with a similar love of life. (57.1%) Independence - Your strong sense of independence comes in handy while dating. You are not held back or tied down; you are free to pursue your interests.
Weaknesses
(83.3%) Pessimism - Too much cynicism can be a turn-off. Try to see the brighter side of things and people will be attracted to your positive outlook. (63.6%) Selfishness - You think too much of yourself and your needs. You must learn to put your partner first and tend to his needs. (62.5%) Shyness - You know all too well the limits shyness places on you. Putting yourself out there in social situations may be difficult, but essential to your dating success. (55.6%) Appearance - Devoting a greater effort at making good first impressions is a must. Try to be fit and develop a style if you want to catch a man's attention. (54.5%) Financial Issues - Your financial situation is not in good shape, and this does not bode well for you on the dating scene. Try to get on top of your financial difficulties.
tagged by: @ksung tagging: @anaxiphvlia @cityafterdark (anyone you feel like doing it for) @xnoctuary @baskuiat & anyone else who hasn’t done it and wants to!
NEGATIVE TRAITS
rules: repost, don’t reblog. bold the traits which apply to your muse. pass it on to your mutuals for a better understanding of their muses.
tagged by: @pullstrings tagging: @anaxiphvlia @xnoctuary @absonovs @cityafterdark (anyone you want!)
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