grrrrl

When you grow up LOW income and start a field in the middle / upper income range and you feel like a fucking OUTCAST.

I live off weed and anxiety

"I evolved a new understanding of the word 'whore,' one that was less about actions and more about essence. It was not that I had done something wrong so much as that I existed in the wrong way. There was something impure in the fact of my being."

It's comforting to think the defect is mine, because that means it is under my control

I can't live one more second broken hearted and with you

How do you ask for help when you're in a world where everyone is screaming for it?

Scared to be alone. Exhausted by reactivity

Today I had a flash of you while walking the dog. I collapsed into tears at the park. I felt the high of raw expression. Raw emotion. Sadness, fear, loneliness and non-acceptance. It all came flooding back in, yet made me feel more powerful than I have in months. I got to see myself again. To be reconnect with what's underneath, with what's real.

Having childhood trauma makes life weird cause it causes you to grow up so fast, yet your triggers cause you to react like a child

COLLAPSE

Burnt out and depressed