Lions At Bay.

Bitches be like ‘I’m so tired and sleepy’ and then stay up doing hyperfixtation shit for the next 5 hours

This Just In: Giant Beast Gingerly Eats Dandelions. More at 11.

i just think it would be so sexy if the rail workers said fuck u to biden and started striking and then truckers would be like ukw slay and joined and it just was a domino effect and everyone stayed home and hung out w their neighbors and shit and everyone worth more than a mil or two killed themselves

if i got jigsawed and woke up in some moldy room with a makeshift bear trap on my head or whatever i wouldn't even let it phase me. i'm not willing to be taught lessons i'm not paying attention to a puppet. i would close my eyes and visualize abstract forms in jewel tones until a machine tears me asunder. now we've both wasted our time and you won't be able to return anything in this room to ace hardware. what did YOU learn, old man

People who switch pronouns in songs to no-homo the situation are so funny. The idea literally never even occurred to me as a kid. Couldn’t be me. I am a woman scorned. I am a man who had his heart broken. I am a guy who hates his hometown. I’m a country boy, I’m a city girl. I’m a slut. I’m addicted to cocaine. It’s a song, man.