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heavily inspired by this riwoo headcanon by @lionhanie
The pastry shop was filled with the sweet smell of fresh-baked cakes, breads, biscuits, cookies, piesâŠ
donutsâŠ
The door's small bell made a ringing sound, indicating that a new customer had come. You lifted your head, since you were taking some new bread and putting it into the small transparent counter.
The customer that came right through the door was no more than your beloved boyfriend, Riwoo.
Coming to the counter, you welcomed him with an âWelcome, my favourite customer!â that made his cheeks faintly blush. He asked for a donut, which you had already taken out of display the moment you saw him entering, knowing his preference.
For the check-out time, you simply got his receipt and wrote something for him there, and as you gave the small donut packaging and the receipt, you also gave to him a small kiss on his cheek, which made him faintly blush.
As he left with the donut in his hand, he quickly read the small note on the receipt with the other hand, ultimately bumping into a chair after reading its content, his eyes lost in a deep daze in the receipt.
As he left the establishment, you could finally see his face: it had a very vivid bright red colorâŠ
How can someone get so flustered by âyou look really pretty today, my cutieâĄâ?
as a former bakery worker iâm cheesing.... i feel like riwoo would be so geeked to find out his lovely amazing s/o just happens to work at a pastry shop omg i KNOOOWWWWW he'd be using that to justify his cravings bc wdym you get a sweet treat AAAANDDDDDD see ur partner awww LURV
menda i miss you please write something like howâs your days goingđ
- đš
hiii my sweet đš nonnie <3 i missed u too....
i've been good!!!! hope you've been well :D sadly i'm back at uni so i'll have even less time to write, but i'm rlly gonna try and hold myself to it especially since i have SO MUCH i Want to write but just. never find the time to do HAHAHAH hopefully no more unspoken disappearances from me in the near future :,,,)
working during the holidays isnât too bad with sanghyeok by your sideÂ
co-worker!riwoo x gn!reader (non-idol au)Â
this work is my contribution to @onedoornetâs christmas event, a very onedoor christmas! check it out here!
word count: 4.1k ËÊâĄÉË genre: fluff
warnings: a pinch of angst i'd say (alluding to burnout/seasonal depression), reader is a people pleaser, i curse maybe twice lol, riwoo is referred to as sanghyeok!Â
a/n: SORRY I KNOW CHRISTMAS IS OVERâŠ. had fun writing it regardless :,) hope u enjoy ^^
reblogs âșÂ + feedback always appreciated!
Being one of the younger workers in the office was frustrating to say the least. Pausing your work to complete trivial tasks in the middle of the workday â making copies of a meeting agenda, fetching your seniorsâ morning coffees, reorganizing the ridiculously large stack of your current clientâs files â the list seemed to never end. For some reason, everyone around you was conveniently occupied with something so urgent that they couldnât attend to the matters themselves, leaving the responsibility up to you. Sometimes you felt like you spent more time faced with useless errands than doing the work you were hired to do in the first place.
You were expecting a bit more respect from your peers when you were appointed as the team leader for your companyâs newest project, but you were quick to realize your naivety in the earlier group meetings, finding that no one seemed to take you seriously. You wouldâve thought that because the other members on the project had years of experience on their side, surely theyâd be able to hold their weight to a certain extent... Right?
Painfully enough, it was the complete opposite. You canât count the number of times one of the more âexperiencedâ workers asked you to repeat a detail youâd discussed just minutes prior, or proposed a suggestion that completely contradicted the end goal of your clientâ it was clear to you that no one saw your leadership as more than a joke, no matter how hard you tried.Â
And to top it all off, your company was structured in such a way that made it nearly impossible for you to speak up against your elders. Your word as a senior associate meant close to nothing if you were going against one of the partners of the firm. It didnât matter that you put in ten times more effort than your team members, it was almost as if they were praised according to how long theyâve been in the office.
Safe to say you were relieved when Sanghyeok was added as a member of the team you were leading on a random Tuesday afternoon. Not that you two were close by any means â the extent of your interactions consisted of small smiles exchanged in passing in the printer room or short discussions of weekend plans over coffee in the break room. Rather, you were hopeful that his addition to the project would mean someone would finally start contributing even a fraction of the work you were putting in.
Even though you dread your bi-weekly team meetings, it was so much more rewarding to at least one other person cared about the success of the project. Sanghyeok was always in his unassigned-assigned seat right by the projector, intently nodding along to your agenda and taking notes when he deemed necessary. Hell, heâd even chime in whenever someone would ask a question that was obviously answered earlier in the presentation, giving you the chance to save your breath for something that actually mattered, and shooting you a cheeky grin afterwards, clearly satisfied helping you whenever he could.Â
á¶» đ đ° .á Four days before the deadline. . .
Everyone begins to pack up their belongings the second it hits 5:00PM, slowly but surely filing out of the office before it gets too dark. It was no surprise to see your colleagues zipping up their briefcases far earlier than you planned on clocking out; the project deadline crept up on you faster than youâd like to admit, and your mostly incompetent team forced you to work overtime a majority of the recent weeks. In any other case, you probably wouldnât be breaking your back hunched over your keyboard hours after the sun had set, but because the project was in your name, it pained you to present a finished product you werenât proud of.Â
âYou arenât leaving yet, Y/N?â You look up from your monitor, finding Sanghyeok looking at you from across your cubicle, wrapping a plush scarf around his neck. His eyes are full of concernâ heâs noticed the way you never seem to budge once your peers start going home for the night. Even on days when he logs off later than heâd initially planned to, youâre still there, typing away at your desk.
âAgh, our Y/N is always so hardworking! They never seem to leave with the rest of us,â Alvin, a senior on your project notorious for sending in half-assed work far past the deadline you set for him, comments from his seat beside you. âI could never put in as much work as you do, not when Iâve got a family waiting for me at home!â Yeah, no shit. Itâs hard to believe heâs stayed at the company so long performing the same quality of work you were doing in your first year in the office.
His words stung a bit, feeling oddly bitter at the idea of someone like him having people who loved him waiting for him to return from workâ Coming back home to an empty apartment late at night never used to bother you, but something about the long winter nights and freezing temperatures made it undoubtedly sad in nature. It wasnât just the weather making your loneliness feel colder than usual.Â
The smile you return is painfully fake, something Sanghyeok clocks almost immediately. He gnaws on his lip, wanting to say something to the senior, ultimately deciding to hold back on it given how new he was to the project. Maybe it wasnât his place. He didnât want to make things worse for you by saying something out of line. Alvin shrugs his coat onto his back, quickly leaving the premises without another word.Â
âIf I didnât see you in a new outfit everyday, Iâd think you slept at your desk,â Sanghyeok jokes, trying to lighten the mood. From his first meeting with the new team, he quickly learned to admire the way you seemed to take charge when you needed to. It was impressive the way youâd joined the company later than he had, and were already put in charge of such a big task. He knew exactly how it felt to deal with all the stupid tasks from the other seniors in the office, finding himself doing the same thing for weeks before you came in.Â
You chuckle pitifully, mainly towards yourself. âAt this point, I should stop paying rent and start living at my desk.â You groan as you take a break for a well-needed stretch, your back cracking from your poor posture. âSome days I feel like Iâm in the office more than my apartment.â Your words are lighthearted, but Sanghyeok notices the underlying melancholy in your statement.Â
And Sanghyeok takes his leave, only after wishing you good luck and a âget home safeâ as he always does, but he canât stop thinking about how much time youâve been putting into your work. Heâs constantly shut down whenever he asks you if thereâs anything else he can help with, just wanting to take a fraction of the load off your plate.
He knows youâre doing it just to be nice. Youâre the type of person to take on a burden all on your own, even if it means committing to the ungodly hours youâve become so used to. Even on the bus ride home, Sanghyeok canât shake your tired eyes out of his mind. For some reason, it hurts to imagine you slowly killing yourself over a silly project all because no one had the decency to bother trying when they knew youâd fix it for them anyways. He wanted to do more⊠No, he needed to do more.Â
á¶» đ đ° .á Three days before the deadline. . .
Sanghyeok wonders how youâre always earlier than him when he walks into the office, finding you so put-together and diligently editing the project presentation when heâs still groggy after his commute to work.Â
The workload around the holidays is never too demanding, thankfully the companyâs clients normally donât ask for much as the year comes to an end. In your case, however, all your time is spent on trying to perfect the project proposal for your overwhelmingly-nitpicky boss. Youâre convinced itâs some sort of test to see how good youâd be leading a team before you get the promotion youâve been waiting on for the past couple months. Even if you make it out of your bossâ critiques alive, youâre certain youâve lost countless years off your life with all the stress weighing down on you.Â
You lock eyes with Sanghyeok every once in a while, finding him peeking over the divider separating your desks more than normal. Thatâs odd. You figure itâs probably because he has a question about the numerous items that still need fixing on the project. It doesnât occur to you that he wants to talk to you until he rises from his chair, tapping his pen on the top of your monitor to catch your attention.
âI donât know if you saw, but I just fixed a lot of the trouble areas you mentioned in the meeting the other day,â Heâs excessively clicking the pen in his free hand, feeling oddly nervous to show you his work even when he knows he did everything properlyâ He knows how high your expectations are when it comes to your job. âIâm pretty sure I made sure to do everything you asked for, but you might want to double-check if I missed anything.â
The gasp of relief you let out is uncharacteristically loud, so much so that it earns you a side-eye from Alvin, who was currently playing solitaire at his desk next to you. Heâd just saved you hours of overtime with his work, finding everything done to a tee. âNo, no, this is perfect. I was dying to fix those until I realized I forgot Christian told me to come with him for his fieldwork later andââ
âIt doesnât matter who goes with him, right? Iâll go with him instead.â
âHuh? Are you sure? I donât mind, plus he specifically asked me so maybeââ
âY/N, itâs fine, really! I used to go on client visits all the time before he started dragging you along with him. Iâll be okay, promise!â Heâs confident in his words, reassuring you of all the concerns he knew were starting to bubble up in your head. âI know youâve been worried about getting everything done before the deadline, you shouldnât have to waste your precious time following him around and pretending like you care about his wife.âÂ
The comment makes you giggle, everyone knew the senior for the way he could go on and on about his family life knowing damn well no one was actually listening to his neverending rants. âThank you, Sanghyeok. It means a lot, really.â Â
âMaybe weâll be able to leave at the same time today, yeah?â
Â
á¶» đ đ° .á Two days before the deadline. . .
The following day, after everyone else in the office logged out for the night, Sanghyeok sneaks back into the office. He made it his mission to discreetly plant a care package for you while youâre busy in the printer roomâ Itâs nothing big, no, rather just a hot cup of tea and a sandwich heâd purchased from the cafe across the street from the building.Â
Youâd offhandedly mentioned the way you get so immersed in your work without anyone peering over your shoulder that you forget to cater to your growing hunger, often resorting to eating instant ramen in the break room before returning to your desk. Sanghyeok knew how much the project meant to you, but that didnât mean he was going to let you neglect your health just for a positive response from your old boss.  Â
Youâre confused when you come back to your cubicle, finding all of your previously haphazardly scattered project papers perfectly organized in a folder by the edge of the desk. The lid was taken off the cup of tea, presumably to let it cool down a bit before drinking. Huh? The note atop the sandwich container answered the questions lingering in your mind.
hope you donât mind me moving some stuff around on your desk :pÂ
eat up before you get back to work! good luck y/n!Â
sanghyeok ( â§áâŠ)
á¶» đ đ° .á One day before the deadline. . .
âYou think Alvin will mind if I borrow his spot today?â Sanghyeok questions, swiveling around in an office chair that didnât belong to him.
âYou could probably erase all the files off his computer and he wouldnât bat an eye,â You joke as you sort through the stacks of papers residing on your desk, looking for a particular document. âIâm convinced he gets paid to just sit there and play card games for eight hours.âÂ
âYeah, I donât think Iâve ever seen him touch his keyboard.â Sanghyeok chuckles before logging into the computer beside you.
âWhyâre you using his computer though? Youâre not going home yet?âÂ
âI think itâs only fair for me to help you finish the proposal when weâre supposed to be submitting it tomorrow,â Sanghyeok answers matter-of-factly. You watch as he opens up the same powerpoint youâve been staring at on his own monitor. Itâs quiet for a few minutes, the only sounds coming from the occasional clicks of your mouse. â...Doesnât it get lonely working all by yourself?â
You pause to think for a moment. Itâs not the worst thing in the world, youâre sure you wouldnât be capable of doing it everyday if it was that unbearable. âNo, not really. If anything, itâs nice to not have anyone pulling me away from my desk for some stupid shitâ Sorry, stupid stuff.â You correct yourself.Â
âI know weâre still at work and all, but you donât need to censor yourself when itâs just us. Iâm not gonna snitch on you for cursing on the clock, Y/N.â He teases, not surprised to see that youâre still in work-mode even when the office is practically empty.Â
âOops, just force of habit. I'd rather die than accidently curse in front of one of the oldies we work with,â You smile sheepishly, feeling at ease with him at your side. Youâre not sure when you grew so fond of the man â maybe itâs because of how similar you are in age or the way heâs always so quick to defend you in the meeting room â but heâs always felt like more of a friend than a co-worker in times like these. â...Itâs nice to have some company for a change, though. Felt like I was going insane looking at the same documents all by myself.âÂ
âItâs okay to admit you get lonely sometimes, Y/N.â Sanghyeok pauses his typing to look at you, his eyes soft when they meet yours. âI was thinking about it on my way home the other day, you know, the way you willingly stay in the office after everyone leaves every night. Itâs hard to imagine it isnât difficult being by yourself all the time.â
Youâre silent, knowing that heâll see through you no matter what you say. Sure, you had your fair share of moments sitting crying at your desk, in fear that your efforts wouldnât pay off despite how much youâve been trying, but that doesnât mean you need his help. You made it this far all on your own, after all.Â
And when you fall asleep at your desk, exhaustion finally catching up to you, Sanghyeok doesnât hesitate to rest a sweater on your back. He knows how upset youâll be once you wake up, bummed that you dozed off at such a crucial time, but heâs more than happy to let you sleep for a bit before gently shaking you awake after a well-deserved power nap.Â
âShit, how long was I knocked out for?â Embarrassed, you rub the sleep from your eyes, turning away to yawn.Â
âIt wasnât even thirty minutes, youâll be fine Y/N. I finished editing a section of the report while you were sleeping too.â You tap on your mouse, waking up the black screen, happy to see that a good chunk of the comments youâd made on the document were long resolved. âCan you promise me something?âÂ
Youâre offset by the sudden serious mood lingering between you two, but you slowly nod regardless. âEven when this project is over, will you promise to come to me if you need help?âÂ
âI know I only joined your team recently, but I want you to know you can depend on me. Itâs not fair for you to do all this on your own,â Sanghyeok can sense the way youâre processing his request in your mind, watching as you hesitate to answer. âI know itâs probably weird coming from someone whoâs only been here a couple months longer than you, but I promise Iâll try my best if you ever need me.âÂ
âOkay.â
â...So that means you wonât try to turn me down whenever I offer to do something for you, right?âÂ
âYes, Sanghyeok, I wonât turn you down when you try to help me.â You roll your eyes at him before turning back to your computer, missing the way his face lights up at your response, proudly smiling to himself.Â
á¶» đ đ° .á The day of the deadline. . .
Youâre sure you could cry tears of joy when you send the final version of your project proposal to your boss. There were a few sections you wish you had more time to perfect, but it was impossible without an extension to your deadlineâ Thereâs nothing else to do but wait until you get feedback, which is entirely out of your hands at this point. 7:15PM. Itâs still two hours past the usual 5:00PM ending time, but far earlier than youâve clocked out in the past two weeks.Â
âYouâre actually leaving at the same time as me? Iâm not dreaming, right?â Sanghyeok pinches at his cheek, earning a giggle from you in response.Â
âWell, I just forwarded all the documents to our boss. Felt like I deserved at least one early night during the holidays,â You close your eyes as you fall back in your chair, letting out a content sigh knowing there wasnât anything else you had to do for a while. âGod, I donât know what Iâd do without you, Sanghyeok.âÂ
He holds the door for you after youâve both collected all of your belongings, bundled up for the harsh temperatures waiting for you outside the building. The elevator ride down is silent until the man next to you clears his throat, prompting you to look at him. âSo, do you have plans tonight?â
âAh, not really. I was planning on picking up some dinner at the convenience store before heading back to my place.â He nods, fiddling with his tie in a feeble attempt to calm down his nerves from what he was about to do.Â
âCan I take you out to dinner, Y/N?â Your eyes widen slightly, unsure what to make of the question. Was he⊠asking you on a date right now? It wasnât out of the ordinary for coworkers to share a meal off the clock, but the fact that it was just the two of you had your brain malfunctioning. â...You know, as a thank you for working so hard on the project! Itâs the least I can do.â Sanghyeok laughed nervously, hand flying up to the back of his neck as he waited for your response.Â
It doesnât take long for you to decide your answer, nodding in confirmation, feeling slightly bashful at the sudden act of appreciation you werenât used to receiving, especially not at work. Thereâs a pep in his step as he brings to you one of his favorite ramen spots, a hole-in-the-wall joint tucked away from the main streets. Itâs cute, honestly. Youâve learned a lot about your coworker in recent days, but this side of him was entirely new to you.Â
Youâre glad you trusted his recommendations when you take your first bite, the hot broth immediately melting the chills you garnered from the short walk there. Despite this being your first interaction with Sanghyeok outside of work, thereâs no awkwardness in your time spent togetherâ Instead, a fuzzy feeling rests in your chest as you look at the man sitting across the table from you. Perhaps itâs due to the newfound absence of pressure on your back from sending in the project proposal, or maybe because itâs the first time youâve allowed yourself a proper meal in days, but itâs a feeling you donât wish to lose any time soon.Â
Usually youâre one to rush back home immediately after dinner, not wanting to lose any second of rest you have before youâre forced to go back to the hell you call work, but youâre more than happy to accept Sanghyeokâs invitation to go to a nearby bar for some drinks following the meal you shared. Itâs there you realize heâs a lot wittier than he comes off as when youâre on the clock, your cheeks aching from smiling so hard at his endless supply of jokes.Â
You donât stay there long, only garnering a couple drinks before finding yourself walking around one of the parks in the area you didnât even know existed, gawking at the string lights adorning the trees. Work was taking up all of your attention that you didnât even have the time to decorate your apartment for the holidays like you normally wouldâve. This was the closest thing you could get, but you were far from complaining.Â
âI never expected you to be like this, Sanghyeok.â You confess after coming down from the fit of laughter heâd induced with one of his stupid puns.
âWhat do you mean?â He asks, worried that heâd done something wrong.Â
âOh, I wasnât trying to say anything bad! Youâre just⊠A breath of fresh air, I guess.â Your words emit a cloud of vapor in the frigid air. âIâm sorry I didnât notice it sooner, Iâve been a real shut-in especially with the deadline andââ
âYou donât need to apologize for that, Y/N.â He cuts you off; heâs well aware of your tendency to apologize for things that you didnât need to be sorry for in the first place. It was one of the only things he wished he could change about you, wanting you to give yourself more credit for the love you poured into everything you did. âI just wanted to make your life easier, I guess. Thanks for giving me the chance to do that tonight.âÂ
âI should really be the one thanking you. Youâve been nothing short of helpful ever since you joined our team,â Thinking back on the past couple days, Sanghyeok never once shied away from doing things to ease your burdens, even going out of his way so you could focus all your attention onto what mattered most to you. âItâs like you were some sort of holiday miracle sent to me.âÂ
Unwrapping the scarf from his neck, Sanghyeok carefully loops it around the back of your head, securing it snugly at the front of your jacket. âItâs freezing⊠You should really be layering up more.â Heâs glad the lighting on the trees is too dim for you to see the blush creeping up his neck after seeing you in his clothes. Heâd probably blame it on the frosty air if you called him out on it. âAh, itâs snowing!âÂ
The gaze you were previously sharing is broken as you look up, crystal white snowflakes slowly sinking from the sky. It was surreal to be standing in the middle of the park, ambient light illuminating the way the snow ended their descent atop your heads, your shared laughter harmonizing at the sight.
And despite the cold weather, you felt warm standing next to him.
genre: fluff
summary: sick on Christmas, youâre ready to sulk until your best friend Woonhak arrives with cheer and hot chocolate. He turns your miserable day into a cozy celebration, but as you recover, he catches your cold. Now itâs your turn to care for him, proving the holidays are always better together.
warnings: heavy mentions of sickness/illness, mentions eating (thatâs all I think)
pairing: bestfriend!woonhak x fem!reader
wc: 1.5k
a/n: day 3!!! slowly getting the rest of the event posted : )
nets: @blossomnet @onedoornet @chrimatanet @k-labels @k-films
You knew it was coming, didnât you? Of course you did. This wasnât your first rodeo. The scratchy throat a week ago, the slight headache that felt like someone tapping a pencil against the back of your skull. You ignored it, as anyone does when Christmas is around the corner. Who has time to be sick when thereâs decorating to do, presents to wrap, and sugar cookies to devour?
But now? Now itâs Christmas morning, and youâre cocooned in a fortress of tissues and blankets. The air smells faintly of menthol rub, and the soft hum of holiday music from your neighborâs house makes your head throb.
âWhy am I like this?â you mumble, voice raspier than youâd like.
You barely have time to pity yourself before your phone buzzes on the nightstand. You glance at it. The bright screen momentarily blinds you, but the name glowing there is enough to make your headache take a backseat.
Woonhak.
Your best friend. The guy whoâs been there through thick and thin, whoâs probably spent more time at your house than his own. The guy whoâs annoyingly, infuriatingly perfect.
You swipe to open the message.
âMerry Christmas! đ Are you alive over there?â
You groan. He knows youâre sickâhe knew yesterday when you had to cancel your annual Christmas Eve movie marathon. Heâd dropped off a care package with a smug grin, promising to âcheck in.â
You type back:
âBarely. Thanks for the plague.â
His response is immediate.
âRude. Iâm coming over.â
You barely have time to protest before your doorbell rings. How does he do that? You shuffle to the door, dragging your blanket around your shoulders like some kind of discount holiday ghost.
When you open the door, there he isâWoonhak. Tall, annoyingly cheerful, holding two cups of something steaming in his hands. Heâs wearing a ridiculous Santa hat that only makes him look more infuriatingly festive.
âMerry Christmas,â he says, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation.
âYouâre going to catch this,â you warn, closing the door behind him.
He grins. âI have the immune system of a tank. Here.â
He thrusts one of the cups into your hands. Itâs hot chocolateâyou can smell it, rich and sweet.
âBribery?â you ask, raising an eyebrow.
âChristmas cheer,â he corrects. He plops down on your couch, kicking off his shoes and settling in like he owns the place.
You sigh, sitting next to him. âYou really didnât have to come.â
âYeah, but you were wallowing,â he says, stealing a sip from your cup. âCanât let that happen. Christmas is sacred.â
You roll your eyes, but you canât help the tiny smile that creeps onto your face. Thatâs the thing about Woonhakâheâs impossible to stay mad at.
It starts slow, like it always does with him. He pulls out his phone and forces you to watch a compilation of the worst Christmas fails he can find. He laughs until heâs clutching his stomach, and youâd roll your eyes again if his laugh werenât so contagious.
Then itâs the Christmas playlistâWoonhak sings every song loudly and off-key, even adding a dramatic falsetto when Mariah Carey comes on. You groan and throw a pillow at him, but it only makes him louder.
By the time afternoon rolls around, youâre feeling less like a walking plague and more like...well, yourself. Your feverâs still lingering, and your voice is shot, but youâre laughing. And when Woonhak pulls out the board games he âjust happened to bring,â you donât even argue.
âIâm not letting you win just because youâre sick,â he says as he sets up the game.
âGood,â you croak. âIâd hate for you to get delusional.â
Somewhere between the fifth round of Uno and the second plate of cookies he insisted on baking (âPre-made dough doesnât count,â he said, all holier-than-thou as if he wasnât the guy who once burnt toast), it hits you.
This is the best Christmas youâve had in years.
Woonhakâs sprawled on the floor, arguing with himself over whether he should play a Draw Four card to win or âkeep the spirit of Christmas aliveâ by going easy on you. Youâre clutching your stomach, laughing harder than you have in weeks.
âYouâre ridiculous,â you tell him, wiping tears from your eyes.
âAnd you love it,â he shoots back, grinning.
You do. You really do.
By the time evening rolls around, youâre both bundled up on the couch. The lights on your tiny, slightly lopsided tree cast a warm glow around the room. âHome Aloneâ is playing on the TV, but neither of you is really watching.
âHey,â Woonhak says, nudging you with his elbow. âFeeling better?â
You nod, leaning your head against his shoulder. âYeah. Thanks.â
âFor what?â
âFor...this. For always showing up. Even when Iâm gross and sick andââ
âStop,â he interrupts, nudging you again. âYouâd do the same for me.â
You would. Without hesitation.
Youâre quiet for a moment, the only sound the soft chatter of the movie and the faint buzz of holiday cheer in the air. Then he speaks again, quieter this time.
âChristmas wouldnât be the same without you, you know.â
Your chest tightens, and you glance up at him. His eyes are focused on the TV, but thereâs something in his expressionâsomething soft, something real.
âYeah,â you whisper. âSame here.â
And in that moment, wrapped in a blanket, your best friend beside you, you realize something. Maybe being sick on Christmas isnât so bad after all.
By the time New Yearâs Eve rolls around, youâre finally feeling like yourself again. The sore throat is gone, your energyâs back, and your voice no longer sounds like a creaky door. Itâs a miracle, really. You even manage to convince Woonhak to come over for a celebratory dinner.
âSee?â you say smugly as you clear the table. âI told you Iâd bounce back in time for the new year. Invincible.â
âYeah, yeah,â Woonhak mutters, slouched on the couch with his arms crossed. But thereâs something off about him. Heâs not his usual, annoyingly chipper self.
âSomething wrong?â you ask, pausing mid-step.
He shakes his head. âNo, Iâm fine.â
But heâs not fine. You can tell by the way heâs rubbing his temples, the way his nose is slightly red, the way his voice has an edge of hoarseness to it.
âWoonhakâŠâ you say slowly, setting the plates down and walking over to him. âAre you sick?â
âNope,â he says too quickly, sinking deeper into the couch. âDefinitely not.â
âLiar,â you accuse, crossing your arms.
He groans, tilting his head back. âOkay, maybe. Just a little. But itâs no big deal.â
You stare at him, realization dawning. âOh my God. You caught it, didnât you?â
âCaught what?â
âThe plague I had! I told you this would happen!â
âStop calling it the plague,â he grumbles, though his stuffy nose makes it sound more like plaaag.
You canât help itâyou laugh. You laugh so hard that tears prick at your eyes. Because of course this would happen. This is how things always go with you and Woonhak: you get sick, he shows up to save the day, and now here he is, on the verge of a cold.
âOh, you think this is funny?â he says, shooting you a half-hearted glare.
âA little,â you admit, biting your lip to stifle more laughter.
âGreat. I take care of you, and this is the thanks I get?â
âHey, I didnât ask you to come over!â
He huffs but doesnât argue. Instead, he flops down dramatically, pulling the blanket over his head like some kind of defeated soldier.
âGuess Iâm dying now,â he says, voice muffled.
âDonât be so dramatic,â you tease, yanking the blanket off his face.
âDramatic?â He looks at you, eyes narrowing. âYou were literally moaning about the âinjustice of lifeâ two days ago.â
âFine, youâve got a point,â you concede, sitting next to him. âBut donât worry. Iâve had practice now. Iâll take care of you.â
He raises an eyebrow. âYou? Taking care of me? Should I be scared?â
You swat his arm. âHey, I make great soup.â
He smirks. âDebatable.â
But despite his teasing, you notice the corners of his mouth tug upward in a small smile.
By the next morning, itâs official: Woonhak is down for the count. Fever, runny nose, the whole package. And true to your word, you step up. You make him soup (yes, real soup, not the instant stuff), keep his water glass full, and even let him hog the TV remote.
âYouâre surprisingly good at this,â he admits one evening, bundled up on the couch with a box of tissues at his side.
âSee? Told you,â you say smugly. âAnd if youâre nice, I might even make cookies.â
âHomemade?â he asks, raising an eyebrow.
âDonât push your luck.â
He laughs, and itâs a little wheezy, but itâs the kind of laugh that makes your chest feel warm.
As the days pass, you settle into a rhythm. You and Woonhak bicker over what to watch, argue about the proper way to steep tea, and inevitably end up laughing until your stomachs hurt.
And somewhere in the middle of it all, you realize something: you wouldnât trade this for anything. Not the sickness, not the chaos, not even the burnt cookies. Because as long as Woonhakâs there, it feels like home.
By the time he starts feeling better, youâre already planning your revenge.
âNext year,â you say as you hand him his coat at the door, âyouâre banned from playing nurse.â
He grins, leaning against the doorframe. âSure you wonât need me?â
âOh, Iâll need you,â you admit. âBut not if it means getting sick all over again.â
âWeâll see,â he says, shooting you a wink as he steps outside.
And as he walks down the snowy path, you canât help but smile. Because deep down, you know the truth: next Christmas, heâll be back. And so will you.
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Literally any thoughts on bf Leehan that you wanna share, go!!
well nonnie... ur in luck bc i have PLENTY of boyfriend leehan thoughts!
recently, i've been listening to beaches by beabadoobee on loop, and it reminds me a loooottttt of leehan (dare i say i miss the thought of surfer!leehan...)
it might be kinda predictable to say but i'm such a strong believer that bf!leehan would just adore bringing you to the beach. his love for you + his love for the water = perfect date! (according to his standards) whether it be walking in the sand, fingers interlocked as you watch the sun set, or messing around in the water trying to catch a crab (??), it's always one of his favorite pasttimes with you!
idk what it is, but i've always been super fond of the idea of bf!leehan being super forward when it comes to loving you. he's not one to shy away from blurting out all the compliments & praises floating around his pretty lil head whenever he sees u ;_; obviously you're in his thoughts 24/7, but he 1000% has pictures of you two together as his homescreen AND lockscreen, and probably also has a polaroid (or two) of you kept safe in his wallet
as your boyfriend, leehan is determined to be your #1 support system through everything, obviously he's Never going to shut up about how much he absolutely adores you. the second you guys made it official, the rest of the members knew they'd never hear the end of his admiration -- it was almost like you took over his entire life (in a Really Healthy and Normal way, obviously). bf!leehan is definitely the type to find a way to mention you in a conversation, even if he has to pull out the most obscure things just to find a way to bring up your name :,)
warnings: ANGST đ , mentions/use of weed + alcohol, cursing, enhypen heeseung mentioned (he's a fuckboy too shocker, be warned when he shows up tho he's kind of an asshole!)
a/n:Â SHE'S BAAAAAACKKKKKKK!!!!
reblogs âșÂ + feedback always appreciated!
Immediately after turning around, you could feel the hot tears welling up in your eyes against your will, threatening to fall. It was hard to stop yourself from crying on your way back to the apartment. At this point in the night, there werenât many people still wandering around campus. Rather, you were left with only yourself and the warm glow emanating from the streetlamps, illuminating your path back home. If you didnât have a roommate waiting up for you, you were sure you couldâve sat crying on the curb until the sun rose.Â
It was unclear what exactly triggered you to lash out on him like that, but you didnât regret it, despite how shitty you currently felt. You were unaware of the pent up frustration bubbling within you, yet you wouldnât dare take back any of the words said back there. Fuck you, Han Taesan.Â
They werenât tears of sadness, no, they felt more like anger; Anger that stemmed from the realization that Taesan lives under the impression that his actions do not affect the people around him. The realization that Taesan is a hypocrite who cannot accept the fact that he could ever be in the wrong. The realization that Taesan is nothing but a ridiculously clueless boy who didnât care to acknowledge his flaws.Â
You felt like an idiot, really. Han Taesan made you feel stupid; he always managed to do so when it came to things that actually mattered. It was stupid to let him use you for his own entertainment when you knew the truth; the signs were everywhereâ yet you would turn a blind eye. Because you wanted to believe that you could trust your heart. The same heart that told you Taesan was capable of seeing you as more than any other girl on his roster. It was stupid for you to think that for you, he would be different. Donât lie to yourself like that.Â
If all of your suspicions were right â if he actually saw you as more than a friend â you knew it would never work. Because Han Taesan is a man who knows the power he holds over others, and he thrives on it. You can tell he loves feeling like he can get everything he wants with just a handsome smile and a few sweet words, devoid of any real meaning, of course. Tonight, you learned something new: The one thing Taesan couldnât control was his emotions. So what does he do about it?
He runs, avoiding them like the plague.Â
You were far from confident in how much you actually knew about him, if any of it was true to begin with, but it was terribly easy to see right through him when it came to this understanding. It was silly to hope that an emotionally closed-off man would treat you the way you deserved to be treated. It was irritating to be so sure that Taesan truly saw you as something more, and yet he was painfully oblivious to his own feelings.
And despite it all, the feeling rumbled deep inside of you, no matter how many times you tried to tell yourself you were wrong, his actions spoke louder than his words, what everyone said about him is real and you know itâŠÂ You still wanted to believe Han Taesan was more than a fuckboy.
â ËïœĄâàšà§Ë
It was difficult for you to tell anyone about what happened two weeks ago with Taesan, because quite frankly, you were embarrassed. Even though you finally got out what youâve been itching to say to his face, itâs hard to feel like you werenât overreacting. After all, you two werenât dating. You were never anything like that, right? Just two friends with some tension, thatâs all. Thereâs no reason to be so hung up on a delusion perpetuated by the questions you answered on your own accord; purely baseless assumptions about the person you thought Han Taesan could be.Â
Life went on, though. Not that it was deemed over the second you got your feelings hurt, but it definitely caused a rift in your daily routine. Youâd be lying to yourself if you said you didnât think about your last conversation with Taesan at least once a day. No word from him at all eitherâ not that you were expecting any. If thereâs one thing you knew for certain about Taesan, it was that heâll disappear when you want to see him most.Â
Youâre not exactly sure how Minnie convinced you to come to a party when you were firm on not going; it probably didn't help that you had Riwoo and Sungho practically begging you to show up to one of their parties just one more time before finals. All the moping youâve been doing recently certainly wasnât helping you get over what happened any time soon. You werenât about to be a party pooper just because you didnât want to risk seeing Taesan later tonight â it was far easier to suck it up and go along with Minnie rather than go through all the trouble of explaining everything thatâs happened until now to your unknowing roommate.Â
Riwoo and Sungho knew exactly how to have fun, so you anticipated something a lot bigger coming from the pair hosting. The party was not as bad as you thought it would beâ Not that you feared you werenât going to enjoy yourself tonight, but it was definitely more lowkey than some of the other outings youâve been to. Probably because Sungho didnât want to go all out knowing heâd have to do a bulk of the post-function cleaning right before exam season. You wouldnât be able to handle anything more than what was going on around you in your current mental state, thatâs for sure.Â
Even so, there were still unfamiliar faces scattered around the apartment as you practically hugged the walls, hard seltzer barely touched in your hands. Minnie was off socializing somewhere; youâd normally be right by her side, more than willing to engage in any of the side quests she found for you to tackle together, but you werenât feeling up to the adventure tonight.Â
You were listening into a conversation Riwoo was currently having with some of his other friends around their coffee table, laughing along and periodically chiming in whenever you pleased. The buzz from the few drinks you had earlier was definitely helping the nerves you first entered with; you hated to admit it, but socializing was far easier with the help of a substance. Itâs easy to blend into the background here, finding yourself satisfied as you sink into their plush couch. That is, until the free space next to you was filled by a stranger, smiling at the people across the table before claiming the empty seat as his own.Â
âSorry, is it cool if I sit here?â Itâs funny how he only asks after heâd sat down, as if he knew you wouldnât turn him away once you saw his face. Heâs ridiculously good-looking, handsome features prominent even in the dimly lit room. Maybe itâs the effect of the drinks you had earlier, but his cologne is making you dizzy in all the right ways. You nod, scooting over slightly to make more room for him on the couch.Â
He turns to face you, gaze burning into the side of your head, effectively pulling your attention away from the other discussion at hand. âI feel like Iâve seen you before,â he comments. The eye contact is oddly intense, and he doesnât shy away from it whatsoever. âIâm Heeseung.â He extends a hand for a handshake, oddly formal considering youâre currently at a party, but you take his hand in yours regardless..Â
âY/N,â You lower your head slightly, giving him a small smile that heâs happy to return. His touch lingers on yours for longer than it probably shouldâve, a smirk plastered on his face the entire time. He knows what heâs doing. It wouldnât hurt to have a little fun flirting with a handsome guy, especially if youâre trying to get over Han Taesan. Just for tonight.
âSo, who do you know here?â Heeseungâs eyes scan the circle of people around you, raising an eyebrow at you alongside his question. You motion your head towards Riwoo, whoâs animatedly re-telling a story youâve heard a billion times to everyone.Â
âMy roommateâs floating around here somewhere, too.â Itâs hard to ignore his staring as he watches you take a sip from the can youâre holding. âYou?âÂ
The two of you stay like that, alternating between Riwooâs storytime and your own side conversations, finding yourself leaning into his touch as the night goes on. It wasnât anything particularly butterfly-inducing, more like the regular ice-breakers you go through whenever youâre faced with someone new, but talking to Heeseung was oddly refreshing. He was an incredibly attractive guy, and charismatic at that, anyone would be happy beneath his arm at a party.
âAh, I remember where Iâve seen you before,â You tilt your head up at him; you were sure you'd never seen him prior to tonight. âYou came to one of our smoke sessions, yeah?â Our? The only other smoke sesh you've been at recently was at Leehan and Taesan's house... Thinking back to it, you vaguely recall hearing his name amongst the names Taesan listed out on that fateful night. Ah, that must be who Heeseung tagged along with.Â
And suddenly you no longer wanted to continue this conversation; the newfound connection linking you two together made you fidget in your seat. Of course Heeseungâs friends with themâ You shouldâve figured from the way he was able to sweet talk you so fast. (For some reason they all happen to be good at doing so.) You didnât want to be involved with anyone in that circle any time soon, and certainly not now.   Â
âI liked that lilâ stunt you pulled with Leehan, doll.â Heeseungâs hand is cold as he reaches to cup your face briefly, bringing his index finger under your chin as he forces you to hold his stare. âWonder what else you can do, hm?â His eyes flicker down to your lips, leaning in ever so slightly before dropping his hold on you.Â
Youâre glad he seems to enjoy the elements of a chaseâ Heeseung doesnât object when you get up to âget another drink,â instead opting to watch you like a predator would its prey as you make your way over to the kitchen. He must think youâre about to fall straight into his hands, melting to putty as he continues his never-ending barrage of flirty comments in an effort to take you home with him later tonight.Â
Youâre quick to take refuge in there, grabbing yourself a bottle of water from the fridge and chugging down a third of it in a feeble attempt to cool down. Now would be a good time to know where your roommate isâ itâd be a lot easier getting away from Heeseungâs advances if you had someone else with you. You feel around your back pocket for your phone, only to find⊠Nothing. Fuck, it probably fell out while you were sitting on the couch.Â
In your attempts to leave, youâre met with a pair of broad shoulders blocking the door frame: Heeseung. âThought you were trying to get away from me, pretty. Had to come and make sure you were really getting a drink for yourself.â The chuckle he lets out is almost scary, especially now that you can see the way he towers over you.Â
You try to squeeze past him, to at least go somewhere with more people, but heâs quick to grab your arm, bringing you deeper into the kitchen with him. âLetâs stay here for a while, itâs too stuffy out there.â Heeseung moves to grab a beer off the counter, opening it with ease as he takes a big swig. âSo, you fuck Leehan yet?âÂ
You choke on your spit at the blunt question, in complete disbelief that heâd ask something like that so casually. âThe hell? Why would I even tell you that?â
âWell, youâre getting worked up over it, so Iâm more inclined to believe that thereâs something between you two now.â Heâs chuckling as he looks at you from where he was standing, leaving only a couple feet between you two. Heâs teasing you just to get under your skin.Â
â...If youâre talking about that bullshit from that night, that was nothing.â Youâd completely forgotten the way you shotgunned with Leehan in an effort to make Taesan jealous; thinking back to it is humiliating, especially knowing it wasnât just Heeseung who witnessed the intimate moment. Damnit, maybe you shouldnât have gone that far.
âIt was hot, you know. Until Taesan went and ruined all the fun by taking you all for himself,â He pauses to take another sip from his bottle. âLooks like youâve got both of them under your belt, huh? Itâs impressive. Most girls would die to be in your place.â Your skin crawled with the way he was openly referring to you like some sort of sexual object being passed around his friends.
âI didnât hook up with either of them, Heeseung. Donât go around talking about shit that isnât true.â The raise of your voice catches him off-guard, but he doesnât back down from a challenge, especially not if itâs you. Your interactions with him felt like you were the subject of some sick mind-game, one where the only goal was to piss off whoever was in their line of vision, and it was working.Â
âSeeing you get so angry is turning me on, angel. You must have something good if it means they both want a piece of you,â He puts his beer down somewhere before striding over to you, forcing you to step back until your back is flush against the cool countertops. Heâs looking down on you once more, arm resting firmly on the cabinet above you, making you feel more caged in than ever. âWhat do you say, my turn next?âÂ
Someone wolf whistles from behind him, making him drop his act as he turns to see who it came from. Itâs no one you know, but youâre more than grateful for the stranger for giving you an out of the situation you were currently in. You ignore the calls of your name as you push past the group of people trying to come in, trying to distance yourself from Heeseung as quickly as possible.Â
You werenât sure where youâd lose him, ultimately deciding that going outside might be your best bet. Damnit, you didnât think to grab your phone on your way outâ Heeseung was probably still looking for you inside, so maybe now wasnât a good time to go back in there. You could live without it for the time being if it meant avoiding that god-awful conversation. The cool air did little to combat the warmth you were currently feeling, a tightness in your chest you could only describe as unease. Your hands trembled at your side, palms sweater than you realized. Fuck, why were you so overwhelmed right now?
It was foolish for you to think you wouldnât run into one of Taesanâs friends â especially knowing that this was Riwoo and Sunghoâs party â but you didnât expect an interaction of that calibre. You felt humiliated, offended even, for something you never did. The way those words rolled off of Heeseungâs tongue as if he was certain they were true; You hated the way Han Taesan had such a presence in your life after the way you two left off.Â
Thereâs small groups of people scattered around outside, luckily too engrossed in their own circles to notice you practically running out the front door. Trying to calm down your pounding heart, you look around in hopes of finding someone you knew to try and distract yourself, to use them as a get-out-of-jail free card if Heeseung came back around. Itâs all a blur, really, scanning the backs of heads of people you donât know, and feeling insane in the process.Â
God, why do they know so many people? You curse yourself for not thinking to grab your phone amidst your route through the apartment; maybe you couldâve called up Minnie to come save you or something. Your eyes glaze over the strangers' faces once more, anxiety creeping into your stomach until you meet a familiar gaze, one that softens immediately upon seeing you.Â
Han Taesan.Â
Shouldâve figured he was somewhere outside if you didnât see him inside the whole night. Damn it, why did he have to be the only person you could name in the immediate vicinity? Heâs stood in a circle of people passing around a joint, eyes fixed onto you despite the fact that someone was currently talking to him. Taesan mouths something to the girl besides him before hastily making his way over to you, parting the group in half to get past them.Â
Seeing him again for the first time since your argument brought back all the emotions you bottled up after your argument, feeling yourself get choked up immediately. You turn your back to him, not wanting to hold eye contact any longer than you need to, and start walking with no end destination in mind. There werenât many other places you could go, not to mention the fact that your phone and roommate were both still inside the apartment, but that didnât matter right now.Â
âWhere are you going?âÂ
You halt your movements, hearing Taesanâs voice from behind you, picking up his pace in an effort to reach you. You didnât know where you were going in the first place. Turning around, you watch as he closes the distance between you two, nothing but the sound of his footsteps echoing through the air. He stopped only a couple feet away, but the smell of weed lingering on his clothes was strong even from where he was standing.Â
âWhyâd you follow me?â
âUh, I donât actually know. I guess I just wanted to see if we could talk,â He scratches the back of his head, struggling to tell you the truth: he missed you. âYou looked upset back there⊠Just wanted to see if you were okay, yeah?âÂ
âIâm fine, just kind of⊠Annoyed.â Just thinking about the way your conversation with Heeseung escalated frustrated you deeply. Taesan tilts his head in confusion at your admission, scooting backwards in the process, not wanting to invade your personal space. âNot at you, idiot. Well, not directly.â Â
âWhat happened inside? Did someone do something to you? Just tell me who and Iâllââ Just like that, Taesan was ready to storm back towards the apartment to find who made you upset, only stopping when you grabbed his wrist, physically preventing him from going any further.Â
âYouâre doing that thing again.â You drop your hold on him. The loss of your touch plants a pit in his stomach.
âWhat are you talking about?â
âThat thing where you act like you care about me,â The boy frowns at you, clearly upset that you donât believe his genuinity. âStop looking at me like that.â
âBaby, câmon. It was never an act,â Taesan reaches to put his hand on your shoulder, only for you to dodge his movements. He pauses for a moment afterwards, debating on what to say next. âI couldnât fake the way I acted with you, even if I tried.â His confession is hushed, loud enough only for him to hear.
âYou guys brought Heeseung with you, didnât you? He was spewing all this bullshit about how you and Leehan are just dying to get into my pants.â Irritation was written clearly into your outburst. â...Unless, heâs telling the truth. Is that what I am to you guys? A stupid bet or something?â
 âFuck, if I knew you were here I wouldâve tried finding you earlier and none of this wouldâve-â
âWhat difference does it make? Arenât you the same way? What makes you think he wouldnât have said the same shit if you were there with me?â The tension in the air is thick, uncomfortable.  âSay something, Dongmin.â
It stung when he didn't bother to utter a single word.
âMaybe it was stupid for me to think like this, but I never wanted to believe any of those ridiculous things people would say about you,â You canât be bothered to wait for a response from the boy standing across from you, not anymore. âIf I was nothing but a game to you, why do you try so hard to act like Iâm not? If you knew those rumors were right all along, whyâd you even bother dragging this out the whole time?â
âDragging what out?â God, is he dense? Â
âUs, Dongmin! Why the hell would you keep up this act for so long if you never gave a shit about me to begin with?âÂ
â...None of that is true, Y/N.âÂ
âThen why donât you just fucking explain it to me then?â Why canât he tell you Heeseung was wrong? Why was it so hard for him to tell you what you needed to hear?
âMaybe itâd help if you didnât see me as some fucking bad guy all the time everything would make a lot more sense,â Thatâs the thing: You could never see him as the villain, even after all this. Even when he has you questioning the confines of your relationship after each and every interaction, youâve never had it in you to cut it off for good. âI donât know why you would assume the worst of me. You of all people, Y/N.âÂ
Itâs you who wants to believe everyone is wrong about him. How could he have it so wrong?Â
âYou must be joking, right? I know youâve heard it all, Dongmin.â A laugh comes out of your mouth, but youâre both well aware it isnât because youâre jokingâ The circumstances have become so twisted that it was almost humorous. âAbout how you love jumping from girl to girl, refusing to give them the time of day after youâre done with them. I was bound to end up as one of them, right?âÂ
âStop, Y/N.â Taesan pleaded shakily.Â
âI donât even know what to call you anymore. Does it even matter, Dongmin?â Taesan, Dongmin. Maybe you hated when Han Dongmin became Han Taesan. It was naive to think that youâd be able to focus on all the good parts of Dongmin when all the bad qualities of Taesan remained fixed in place.Â
You couldnât stop yourself from continuing, not now. Han Taesan would never fix his issues if he ran away from them, consistently refusing to fix them properly â If you have to be the one to tell him the truth to his face, then so be it. âHave you ever wondered why we always come back to each other like this? Especially when we both know we never get anywhere afterwards?â
 Taesan canât meet your gaze.Â
âThereâs something wrong with the way we work, you know that, right? Youâd be fucking lying to yourself if you really believed what you said back then,â The buzz from the alcohol was running dry, emotions heightened the more you sobered up. âI donât know what kind of misconstrued definition you have for friends, but we were never just friends, Dongmin. You have to understand that much.âÂ
You take a moment to catch your breath, running a hand through your hair in frustration. âI canât assume the worst in you,â It almost pains you to admit that to him; to let him know that at the end of the day, youâre still weak for him, and youâre well aware of the fact. âNo matter how many times you leave me hanging, the way you always do, I always come back to you and I hate myself for it.âÂ
âShit, I donât know why something in me wants to believe that youâre more than what everyone makes you out to beâ and I try, time and time again, to prove myself correct but I canât do anything about you going silent on me all the time, Taesan.â
âFuck, Y/N, I just⊠I canât let you end up like everyone else.â Itâs the first time heâs even attempted speaking up in the past couple minutes. âWhy canât you just trust me on this?â
âIs that all you have to say? What do you want me to make out of that?â How did Taesan expect you to trust him when he gave you nothing to begin with? If he bothered to explain what was going on in his head, maybe, just maybe, you two would be able to fix things. âWhyâs it so hard for you to just tell me?âÂ
âI-I donât know what it is,â His voice is the smallest youâve ever heard it, itâs hard to believe itâs actually coming from him. âIâd tell you in a heartbeat if I understood, Y/N. I really would.âÂ
It occurred to you that Taesan was just as lost as you were when it involved his own emotions: This coversation was going nowhere. Until he came to terms with whatâs been holding himself back, youâre certain of one thing. âI donât want to see you anymore, Taesan.âÂ
And he watches as you shove past him, beginning the trek back to the party all on your own. Even when he averts his gaze, he couldnât help but turn back around, in hopes youâd be looking back too. It was only when your silhouette became lost among the crowd of people that Han Taesan dropped to his knees, gravel harsh against the bare skin exposed by the rips in his jeans, and choked out a sob.Â
How did things get so complicated?
< SUPER SPECIAL TAG 3: @minwrlds my bodacious beloved beautiful b2u beta reader U mean the world to me BTW.
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ââââ 0t6!boynextdoor x f ! r â± â est. relationship, fluff âż w. none, they are just cuties wc. 0.7K+ ( 757 ) ïœĄ ïœĄ first post of 2025 đ !! ( many more bnd works to come! ) happy new years everyone !! i am so thankful for everyone && i hope that 2025 treats you well and also becomes your year đ€ !!
no matter what kind of tricks you could pull, he never seems to get even a little bit annoyed. in fact, it's almost as if he adores you even more because of your antics. sometimes, it leaves you wondering if anything could tick him off at all. in reality, he might just play hard to get purposefully just to watch you persistently ask for something he would do for you without a second thoughtâno matter what it was. he just finds it rather cute when you're so determined to make him do something that you want. you wouldnât even notice itâs an act until you see his wide grin as he finally âgivesâ in. so really, there's no need to beg for anythingâyouâre his weak spot, and he doesn't even try to hide it.
PARK SUNGHO dragging him into doing silly trends
regardless how silly he may think the tiktok you just showed him is, thereâs such a low chance for him to say no. almost all of the time, youâd catch him saying yes. to his defense, how could he say no to someone like you? he loves seeing that spark of excitement in your eyes and canât help but smile as you eagerly set up for the video youâre about to record. sungho, without a doubt, would just look at you with so much love as you tie that pink ribbon around him, adoring and cheesing over you internally.
LEE SANGHYEOK random physical touch
he doesnât dislike physical touch, however, he will get all tensed up if someone were to randomly give it to him without warning. but with you? thatâs a complete different storyâpoke at him, wrap your arms around him, or even smother him with affection, and he'd let it happen without a single complaint. if you wanted it, heâd simply give it to you. regardless, itâs a win-win situation for himâyouâd get all the physical touch you want and he gets pampered with your sweet kisses and hugs. letâs say, there was always a motive all alongâone that leaves him content with getting to keep you as close as possible.
HAN DONGMIN taking his belongings without asking
the first time he saw you wearing one of his hoodies, he couldâve sworn he fell even harder for you. sure, heâs the type who usually prefers when people ask before borrowing his things, but seeing you in it? that was a whole different story. it brought an instant smile to his face, one he couldnât hide even if he tried. from that moment on, heâs never refused youâor asked for anything back. need to borrow his phone for a bit? go ahead. want to wear that accessory he cherishes so much? itâs yours. heâs just that down bad for you. honestly, it doesnât matter how long itâs out of his sight because as long as itâs with you, heâs at ease. he trusts you completelyâand maybe, just maybe, he secretly loves the reminder that heâs yours.
KIM DONGHYUN you have all of his attention
safe to say, you have the leehan completely swooned. you could be distracting him from his game or youtube video, but the moment you call his name, it's like everything fades into the background. itâs almost as if, within a split of a second, heâd be right there for you. even when you donât call for him, heâll pause whatever heâs doing just to check up on you. whether itâs a quick text or simply staying close within your reach, itâs more than enough to keep him content. his eyes soften the moment they land on you, almost as if he canât help but admire the person who means the most to him. and honestly? he wouldnât want it any other way.
KIM WOONHAK decorating his belongings
at first, he might refuse and say a few half-hearted complaints as you pulled out your sticker sheets. but the moment you stuck those tiny heart stickers on his phone case, it was game over. his heart started racing faster than heâd like to admit, and suddenly, those so-called âchildishâ designs didnât seem so bad. ever since then, heâs been extra cautious with anything youâve decorated, treating them with such care as if his life depended on it. heâs practically paranoid about getting even the tiniest scratch on them. in fact, he takes every chance he gets to proudly show them offâwhether itâs his phone, notebook, or water bottleâand purposely leaves his things out in the open, secretly hoping youâll add more. it doesnât matter if the stickers are cute, silly, or completely random. what matters is that youâre the one who decorated them, and to him, that makes them absolutely perfect.
âđŹâ âââ new year new layout ( ? ) do we like this way of writing for hcs ??
warnings: TW SCHOOL đ, written in lowercase, thereâs a curse word here and thereâŠ, No Beta We Die Like Men (not proofread very well lmao)
a/n: wrote this while i was procrastinating studying for my final exams :,) soooo these r self indulgent hoohohoh ... enjoy :3
reblogs âșÂ + feedback always appreciated!
°ââ.àłàż*:sungho
tbh i feel like heâs the type to not study and just. be perfect idkÂ
sungho pays attention in class so he doesnât feel the need to review extensively before the exam ⊠COULD NOT BE ME!!!!
with that being said tho, heâs the perfect tutor ^_^
sungho will definitely be right by your side as youâre doing the exam review packet, waiting to see if you get stumped on a particular questionÂ
when you do, he walks you through the steps you got stuck on, making sure you /actually/ understand the content rather than just doing whatever he tells you to do
and if he isnât able to be physically there with you, he will literally be on standby bc heâs so used to you calling him for help the night before the exam :,)Â
he is SO patient too. especially because he sees how hard youâre working and he just wants to see all of your hard work pay offÂ
sometimes youâll feel bad because you feel like youâre taking up too much of his time just because you donât understand the materialÂ
but heâs so quick to reassure you about it all bc he genuinely doesnât mind, and he will MAKE SURE you know thatÂ
âá°
you place your head into your hands for the nth time that night, groaning at the way you canât seem to memorize the right definitions. sungho chuckles from the other side of the phone, knowing exactly how you look despite not being able to see you right now. âeverything okay over there?â
âiâve been studying for so long and it still doesnât make any sense,â taking a look at the time, you realize itâs later than you expected. âyou know, you really donât need to help me study right?âÂ
âhow many times do i have to tell you thatââ
âyeah, i know you donât mind, but i always feel bad keeping you awake any later than you need to be.â of course youâd take all the help you could get, but you donât have it in you to hold him hostage again for the sake of your grade. â...goodnight, sungho!â you end the call before he has any chance to reassure you any further.
âŠyouâre not surprised when you get a knock on your door 20 minutes later, opening it to see sungho with a bunch of snacks in one hand and his backpack slung over his shoulder. âare you still going to turn me down after i went through all the trouble of coming over?âÂ
°ââ.àłàż*: jaehyun
heâs so annoying to study with (endearingly) but i feel like a study sesh with him would guarantee you are getting a good grade on your exams
since heâs so hardworking i feel like heâd immediately call you out if you were getting sidetracked when you werenât supposed to beÂ
or if he doesnâtâŠ. him being Ultra Locked In only makes You feel like you Also need to be Ultra Locked In
itâs honestly kind of scary how On Top Of Business jae can be when he needs to studyâŠ. bc heâs normally pretty hyper Every Other Time, you didnât know he was capable of being so quiet for an extended period of time
itâs suuuuper impressive how seriously he takes his studies though⊠sometimes youâll stop him when you have a question about something and heâll explain it with EASE before immediately getting back into the zone
bad news for yappers because jaehyun is NOT entertaining the conversation unless he is Also taking a break. if anything he might even be the type to side-eye the people being too loud in the library because he doesnât want them to distract youÂ
honestly though itâll probably help you get a lot more doneÂ
even though he studies like his life depends on it, i think heâs really good when it comes to balancing the work so your brain isnât fried too quickly
i fully believe he will like. have some weird ass Study âHacksâ that lowkey make no sense but you entertain them bc heâs a cutiepatootie :3Â
âá°
the rustling from the other side of the table takes your attention away from your laptop, taking off one earbud before asking the boy across from you what he was doing. jaehyun doesnât turn to answer, instead continuing to dig through the various compartments of his backpack for who knows what. âyou know about superfoods and stuff?â
â...yeah? what does that have to do with what weâre studying though?â you let out a soft laugh, unsure about where heâs going with this conversation.Â
âwell, i heard that if you eat five almonds everyday it makes you smarter. there was a study on it and everything, i swear.â you raise your eyebrow at his words, finding it hard not to roll your eyes at the ridiculous âfactâ he just proposed. moments later, heâs plopping a ziploc bag full of almonds in the middle of the table, looking incredibly satisfied with himself.Â
you watch as he counts five almonds for the both of you, motioning for your hand to pass your portion over. âwhy donât we just eat a ton of almonds so we become geniuses?â you move to reach for the bag to grab more, before he snatches it away from you.Â
âno, we canât do that. the limit is five almonds, or else it starts reversing the effects,â jaehyun tosses an almond into the air and catches it with his mouth. âor something like that, i didnât actually read the study.â he grins at you from his side of the table, making you laugh in disbelief before resuming your work, almonds by your side.
°ââ.àłàż*: taesan
personally i think taesan is the type to just. periodically check in from time to time while youâre studying
he seems like the type to focus best when heâs completely in his own space, so he wants to give you that same space (especially if heâs working on music, he doesnât want to bother you with the noise)Â
âŠ.but that doesnât mean heâs completely ignoring you while youâre out in the living room hunched over all your papers
heâd probably ask if you wanted to do the pomodoro method with him LMFAOOO like. you do work for 50 minutes and then u get a 10 min break
it honestly helps make the work go by faster bc youâre just looking forward to your next break w/ him :,)Â
when the fifty minutes is up and itâs time for both of your breaks, heâs so excited to come out of his room and just Recharge with you. simply seeing you quite literally gives him enough energy to go back to whatever heâs currently working onÂ
if he found you too burnt out from studying for so long, heâd make an exception to his rules & heâd let you take a longer break bc he knows how much effort youâve been putting into prepping for your testsÂ
âá°
you were only halfway into your fifty-minute work interval, but taesan could sense something was wrong when he left his room to get some water. instead of taking notes like you were earlier, your pen was left abandoned on the side of your textbook as you frowned down onto the blur of words you were trying to take in.Â
taesan knows how hard it is to keep working when you hit a mental roadblockâ he knows how badly you need to study right now, but itâll be no use trying to force yourself when you clearly need to step away. he peeks around the corner, clearing his throat to catch your attention.Â
âhm?â you tilt your head as you look up from your notebook, frustration clearly written all over your face. it almost pains him to see you so stressed over exams. âis it time for break already? i couldâve sworn i just startedââ
âmaybe you just got so into it that you didnât realize how much time passed,â he bluffs, walking up to the table. âdo you want to see what iâve been working on? i feel like i need a second opinion on it, something isnât quite right with the melodies.âÂ
taesan finds it cute how your face lights up immediately; you were clearly looking for any excuse to walk away from your work, but you knew youâd feel guilty if you had no good reason to do so. since taesan really needs your help, itâs fine⊠right?Â
°ââ.àłàż*: leehanÂ
idk something makes me feel like leehan just dgaf LOLOLOL but heâs definitely not going to bother you much unless youâre taking a break or something
i donât think he puts too much effort into studying but heâs definitely just going to be in your general vicinity so you donât get too lonely looking at your computer screen for so long⊠heâs just there in spirit
if u were in the same class & u asked him what Something Meant⊠he genuinely could not tell you unless it was about a topic he was actually interested in. bro just has his laptop open to feel included yk
i think heâd be the type to see you frustrated over whatever concept you canât seem to get right & literally Make You take a break so you can clear your mindÂ
you didnât realize it while you were too focused on doing work, but heâs constantly been catering to your every need so you donât get distracted
like he made sure your water bottle was refilled every time you finished it
turned up the heat in the apartment when he noticed you shivering
opening curtains so the sun lights up your workspace n makes it less stuffy :,)
i totally see him as the type to stay up as long as you are, even if he isnât studying with you
again. just the idea of him wanting to keep you company so you donât feel lonely ARRGHHHHH
like maybe heâs just sitting at the table w/ you as he watches u do work (like a freako) ((I need him so bad))
even if he falls asleep in the process⊠at least heâs nearby in case you need himâŠ. (he wakes up every now and then to make sure youâre doing OK)Â
âá°
you canât help but turn around when you hear all the commotion your friend (heâs in love w/ you btw) is currently making in the kitchen behind you. sensing your gaze, he looks back slowly, giving you a sheepish smile. âi know iâm being loud, but iâm doing this for you, okay?â
before you get the chance to question what he meant, heâs balancing a tray in his hands as he makes his way over to your desk. itâs adorned with anything you could possibly want during your study sessionâ a steaming cup of tea, a plate of fresh fruit cut into cute shapes, a bag of your favorite chips, some of the gummies you two were sharing earlier, and even a bottle of painkillers for the eventual headache youâll get from looking at the screen for too long.Â
you could honestly cry; it wasnât a grand gesture, but youâve been so overwhelmed trying to meet all the deadlines youâd made for yourself recently that youâve been neglecting your own needs in the process. leehanâs clearly proud of himself as he takes a seat next to you, resting his head on his palm as he watches you. âyouâre not gonna study with me?â you question, popping a piece of fruit into your mouth as you look at him. after all, you did ask to study together.Â
âi was kind of hoping being next to you while you reviewed would transfer all the knowledge to me.â his eyes turn to crescents as he grins at you. you guess that works too.
°ââ.àłàż*: riwoo
riwoo would prefer to do work specifically at home bc he likes to be comfy if heâs gonna spend a majority of the day studying
with this being said tho⊠heâs restless. he moves every hour bc it claims it helps him focus if he changes up his surroundings every once in a whileÂ
def going to put on some music and maybe light some candles so you arenât too miserable trying to learn so much content the day before the exam ⊠heâs all for setting the vibes PERFECT for the study sesh
i like to think riwoo has like. a system he uses to keep the both of you motivated while studying (i do this. im projecting)Â
likeâŠ. if you both get the next 10 practice problems right⊠you can share the slice of cake waiting in fridge LOL or maybe if you finish writing one more paragraph of your essay, then you can go lay in bed for seven minutes idk i think heâd be really random with it
riwoo always says that you guys are gonna take a âshortâ break but it usually ends up 3x longer than you intended
heâd say âmaybe we should take the dogs for a walk to get a breather before getting back to workâ
and then you come back 40 minutes later bc you two got distracted letting daebak and jangyi play with all the other dogs in the park T_T
heâs 100% the type to try and discreetly watch tiktok or something when youâre both supposed to be doing work and it plays on full volume (woonhak would too but he would not try to hide it)
honestly i feel like heâd get tired of his own studies at some point, but i know heâd stay with you to help you review or just to encourage you to keep going <3Â
âá°
youâre welcomed with warm lighting and the sweet aroma of a seasonal candle as riwoo opens his front door, daebak in his arms and jjangyi wandering around the room behind him. itâs a familiar environment; youâve gotten used to doing work with riwoo in the comfort of his own home, finding it much easier to focus there than any of the popular study spots on campus.Â
youâre sitting at the dining table, one paragraph of your essay on the verge of completion. riwoo is sprawled across the couch, his laptop laying haphazardly on his chest as he swipes across the trackpad. âdo you remember that takeout place we passed by last week? i was thinking we should order some later once we get hungry!âÂ
â...are you looking at the menu right now?â
âwell, noâŠâ you glance at him from your seat, clearly doubtful. â...okay, maybe i am. i canât focus when all i can think about is how good it smelled walking by the place!â he groans, shutting his laptop and placing it on the coffee table beside him before moving to a more comfortable position on his couch.Â
heâs so quiet that you almost forget heâs there when youâre locked into your essay, snapped out of your zone when he sighs dramatically, not having moved an inch since you last looked at him. youâre not sure why heâs the one in distress when he hasnât touched his laptop in nearly forty minutes.Â
ây/nnnnnâŠ. i donât wanna study for my classes,â you donât have it in you to scold him, especially when heâs the one letting you work at his place to begin with, but you canât just let him do nothing the whole time. âcan you take a break so i donât die of boredom over here?â
âokay, how about you come over here and help me proofread my paper, then we can get food once i finish?â he makes his way over to you, using his socks to slide across the wooden floors in the process, more than happy to occupy himself with something if it meant he got to hang out with you afterwards!
°ââ.àłàż*: woonhak
finals season with woonhak honestly seems like it would be hell LMFAOOOOOO
genuinely i think heâs the last person iâd ask to study just because i feel like procrastinator x procrastinator is a DEAD END!!!
no shade but the chances of both of you locking in at the same time are little to NONE.
trying to be accountability buddies for each other genuinely doesnât work because. he just doesnât want to study â ïž
bro is definitely trying to convince you that you donât need to study (you desperately do)
and even IFâŠ. you guys both start workingâŠ. it genuinely doesnât last long LOLOLOL
woonhak literally cannot shut the hell up when heâs doing work for some reason. everything needs to have some sort of commentary, even if you guys arenât even studying for the same class
if you didnât also Need To Study, itâd be pretty funny to hear him complaining about getting every other question wrongâŠ. and his periodic comments are NOT helping đ
but bc of that i think heâs the most willing to stay up late with you to study just because you wasted so much time doing Who Knows What that you both feel like you need to pull an all nighter if you want to pass that test YIKES
u eventually both feel SO GUILTY bc you wasted so much time doing NOTHING productive and itâs already 11pmâŠ. guess you have to make up for it by ACTUALLY being productive until 4am . . . .
the urgency finally kicks in and you actually ARE clocked tf in until youâre literally forced to get out of the library
âá°
the security guard working the front desk at the library gives the two of you a quizzical look as you walk through the doors at 11:37pm, whereas most of the other students tend to wrap up their studies around this time. this wasnât out of the ordinary for you and woonhakâ you knew what you were getting yourself into when you first texted him asking him if he was free to study earlier in the day.Â
just a couple hours ago, the two of you were seated on the floor of his dorm, pages of notes sprawled across the carpet in a pathetic attempt to try and make a game plan for a semesters-worth of material you had to learn before the final tomorrow. it was almost laughable the way neither of you could make sense of the content in front of you.Â
âhow is it that weâve gone to every lecture and we still donât know whatâs going on?â itâs a useless question, given that neither of you are capable of providing any sort of explanation.Â
âhave you seen that video where they rub their notes on their heads to try and send the information to your brainââ
âwoonhak, you know that doesnât actually work, right?â
âright. i just wanted to know if you saw it too. haha.â thereâs an air of silence between you two as you both realize how screwed you actually are for the test, but nobody dares to speak it into existence. âshould we go to the arcade before we start studying?â
âŠand thatâs how you found yourself set up in one of the booths in the far corner of the library (obviously after wasting three hours and twenty bucks at the claw machines), the tabletop adorned with a jumbled mix of your shared review problems, scrap paper balled up in a growing pile, and two freshly-opened energy drinks. youâre both lucky that the library doesnât close for another couple hours, you needed all the time you could get to try and burn the information into your brains.Â
when you walk out of the exam room, seeing woonhak laying on a bench outside & using his backpack as a makeshift pillow as he waits for you to finish, you canât help at chuckle at the look of defeat on his face. itâs funny the way your eye bags match his own; youâve definitely seen each other at your lowest at this point.Â
âsoâŠhow do you think you did?â
âcan we talk about this after i take a nap at your dorm for, i donât know, three days?â
ă 0. prologue; 1. cutie patootie; 2. baby come back; 3. twisty kind; 4. shakespearean; 5. pp is small; 6. still standing here; 7. recovery; 8. bad idea; 9. off the street; 10. stupid, not blind; more chapters tba ă
disclaimer: this, in no way, reflects the idols. this is purely fiction.
â§ comments and reblogs are appreciated! â§
give my other works a read too!
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warnings: ANGST đ , mentions/use of weed + alcohol, cursing, enhypen heeseung mentioned (he's a fuckboy too shocker, be warned when he shows up tho he's kind of an asshole!)
a/n:Â SHE'S BAAAAAACKKKKKKK!!!!
reblogs âșÂ + feedback always appreciated!
Immediately after turning around, you could feel the hot tears welling up in your eyes against your will, threatening to fall. It was hard to stop yourself from crying on your way back to the apartment. At this point in the night, there werenât many people still wandering around campus. Rather, you were left with only yourself and the warm glow emanating from the streetlamps, illuminating your path back home. If you didnât have a roommate waiting up for you, you were sure you couldâve sat crying on the curb until the sun rose.Â
It was unclear what exactly triggered you to lash out on him like that, but you didnât regret it, despite how shitty you currently felt. You were unaware of the pent up frustration bubbling within you, yet you wouldnât dare take back any of the words said back there. Fuck you, Han Taesan.Â
They werenât tears of sadness, no, they felt more like anger; Anger that stemmed from the realization that Taesan lives under the impression that his actions do not affect the people around him. The realization that Taesan is a hypocrite who cannot accept the fact that he could ever be in the wrong. The realization that Taesan is nothing but a ridiculously clueless boy who didnât care to acknowledge his flaws.Â
You felt like an idiot, really. Han Taesan made you feel stupid; he always managed to do so when it came to things that actually mattered. It was stupid to let him use you for his own entertainment when you knew the truth; the signs were everywhereâ yet you would turn a blind eye. Because you wanted to believe that you could trust your heart. The same heart that told you Taesan was capable of seeing you as more than any other girl on his roster. It was stupid for you to think that for you, he would be different. Donât lie to yourself like that.Â
If all of your suspicions were right â if he actually saw you as more than a friend â you knew it would never work. Because Han Taesan is a man who knows the power he holds over others, and he thrives on it. You can tell he loves feeling like he can get everything he wants with just a handsome smile and a few sweet words, devoid of any real meaning, of course. Tonight, you learned something new: The one thing Taesan couldnât control was his emotions. So what does he do about it?
He runs, avoiding them like the plague.Â
You were far from confident in how much you actually knew about him, if any of it was true to begin with, but it was terribly easy to see right through him when it came to this understanding. It was silly to hope that an emotionally closed-off man would treat you the way you deserved to be treated. It was irritating to be so sure that Taesan truly saw you as something more, and yet he was painfully oblivious to his own feelings.
And despite it all, the feeling rumbled deep inside of you, no matter how many times you tried to tell yourself you were wrong, his actions spoke louder than his words, what everyone said about him is real and you know itâŠÂ You still wanted to believe Han Taesan was more than a fuckboy.
â ËïœĄâàšà§Ë
It was difficult for you to tell anyone about what happened two weeks ago with Taesan, because quite frankly, you were embarrassed. Even though you finally got out what youâve been itching to say to his face, itâs hard to feel like you werenât overreacting. After all, you two werenât dating. You were never anything like that, right? Just two friends with some tension, thatâs all. Thereâs no reason to be so hung up on a delusion perpetuated by the questions you answered on your own accord; purely baseless assumptions about the person you thought Han Taesan could be.Â
Life went on, though. Not that it was deemed over the second you got your feelings hurt, but it definitely caused a rift in your daily routine. Youâd be lying to yourself if you said you didnât think about your last conversation with Taesan at least once a day. No word from him at all eitherâ not that you were expecting any. If thereâs one thing you knew for certain about Taesan, it was that heâll disappear when you want to see him most.Â
Youâre not exactly sure how Minnie convinced you to come to a party when you were firm on not going; it probably didn't help that you had Riwoo and Sungho practically begging you to show up to one of their parties just one more time before finals. All the moping youâve been doing recently certainly wasnât helping you get over what happened any time soon. You werenât about to be a party pooper just because you didnât want to risk seeing Taesan later tonight â it was far easier to suck it up and go along with Minnie rather than go through all the trouble of explaining everything thatâs happened until now to your unknowing roommate.Â
Riwoo and Sungho knew exactly how to have fun, so you anticipated something a lot bigger coming from the pair hosting. The party was not as bad as you thought it would beâ Not that you feared you werenât going to enjoy yourself tonight, but it was definitely more lowkey than some of the other outings youâve been to. Probably because Sungho didnât want to go all out knowing heâd have to do a bulk of the post-function cleaning right before exam season. You wouldnât be able to handle anything more than what was going on around you in your current mental state, thatâs for sure.Â
Even so, there were still unfamiliar faces scattered around the apartment as you practically hugged the walls, hard seltzer barely touched in your hands. Minnie was off socializing somewhere; youâd normally be right by her side, more than willing to engage in any of the side quests she found for you to tackle together, but you werenât feeling up to the adventure tonight.Â
You were listening into a conversation Riwoo was currently having with some of his other friends around their coffee table, laughing along and periodically chiming in whenever you pleased. The buzz from the few drinks you had earlier was definitely helping the nerves you first entered with; you hated to admit it, but socializing was far easier with the help of a substance. Itâs easy to blend into the background here, finding yourself satisfied as you sink into their plush couch. That is, until the free space next to you was filled by a stranger, smiling at the people across the table before claiming the empty seat as his own.Â
âSorry, is it cool if I sit here?â Itâs funny how he only asks after heâd sat down, as if he knew you wouldnât turn him away once you saw his face. Heâs ridiculously good-looking, handsome features prominent even in the dimly lit room. Maybe itâs the effect of the drinks you had earlier, but his cologne is making you dizzy in all the right ways. You nod, scooting over slightly to make more room for him on the couch.Â
He turns to face you, gaze burning into the side of your head, effectively pulling your attention away from the other discussion at hand. âI feel like Iâve seen you before,â he comments. The eye contact is oddly intense, and he doesnât shy away from it whatsoever. âIâm Heeseung.â He extends a hand for a handshake, oddly formal considering youâre currently at a party, but you take his hand in yours regardless..Â
âY/N,â You lower your head slightly, giving him a small smile that heâs happy to return. His touch lingers on yours for longer than it probably shouldâve, a smirk plastered on his face the entire time. He knows what heâs doing. It wouldnât hurt to have a little fun flirting with a handsome guy, especially if youâre trying to get over Han Taesan. Just for tonight.
âSo, who do you know here?â Heeseungâs eyes scan the circle of people around you, raising an eyebrow at you alongside his question. You motion your head towards Riwoo, whoâs animatedly re-telling a story youâve heard a billion times to everyone.Â
âMy roommateâs floating around here somewhere, too.â Itâs hard to ignore his staring as he watches you take a sip from the can youâre holding. âYou?âÂ
The two of you stay like that, alternating between Riwooâs storytime and your own side conversations, finding yourself leaning into his touch as the night goes on. It wasnât anything particularly butterfly-inducing, more like the regular ice-breakers you go through whenever youâre faced with someone new, but talking to Heeseung was oddly refreshing. He was an incredibly attractive guy, and charismatic at that, anyone would be happy beneath his arm at a party.
âAh, I remember where Iâve seen you before,â You tilt your head up at him; you were sure you'd never seen him prior to tonight. âYou came to one of our smoke sessions, yeah?â Our? The only other smoke sesh you've been at recently was at Leehan and Taesan's house... Thinking back to it, you vaguely recall hearing his name amongst the names Taesan listed out on that fateful night. Ah, that must be who Heeseung tagged along with.Â
And suddenly you no longer wanted to continue this conversation; the newfound connection linking you two together made you fidget in your seat. Of course Heeseungâs friends with themâ You shouldâve figured from the way he was able to sweet talk you so fast. (For some reason they all happen to be good at doing so.) You didnât want to be involved with anyone in that circle any time soon, and certainly not now.   Â
âI liked that lilâ stunt you pulled with Leehan, doll.â Heeseungâs hand is cold as he reaches to cup your face briefly, bringing his index finger under your chin as he forces you to hold his stare. âWonder what else you can do, hm?â His eyes flicker down to your lips, leaning in ever so slightly before dropping his hold on you.Â
Youâre glad he seems to enjoy the elements of a chaseâ Heeseung doesnât object when you get up to âget another drink,â instead opting to watch you like a predator would its prey as you make your way over to the kitchen. He must think youâre about to fall straight into his hands, melting to putty as he continues his never-ending barrage of flirty comments in an effort to take you home with him later tonight.Â
Youâre quick to take refuge in there, grabbing yourself a bottle of water from the fridge and chugging down a third of it in a feeble attempt to cool down. Now would be a good time to know where your roommate isâ itâd be a lot easier getting away from Heeseungâs advances if you had someone else with you. You feel around your back pocket for your phone, only to find⊠Nothing. Fuck, it probably fell out while you were sitting on the couch.Â
In your attempts to leave, youâre met with a pair of broad shoulders blocking the door frame: Heeseung. âThought you were trying to get away from me, pretty. Had to come and make sure you were really getting a drink for yourself.â The chuckle he lets out is almost scary, especially now that you can see the way he towers over you.Â
You try to squeeze past him, to at least go somewhere with more people, but heâs quick to grab your arm, bringing you deeper into the kitchen with him. âLetâs stay here for a while, itâs too stuffy out there.â Heeseung moves to grab a beer off the counter, opening it with ease as he takes a big swig. âSo, you fuck Leehan yet?âÂ
You choke on your spit at the blunt question, in complete disbelief that heâd ask something like that so casually. âThe hell? Why would I even tell you that?â
âWell, youâre getting worked up over it, so Iâm more inclined to believe that thereâs something between you two now.â Heâs chuckling as he looks at you from where he was standing, leaving only a couple feet between you two. Heâs teasing you just to get under your skin.Â
â...If youâre talking about that bullshit from that night, that was nothing.â Youâd completely forgotten the way you shotgunned with Leehan in an effort to make Taesan jealous; thinking back to it is humiliating, especially knowing it wasnât just Heeseung who witnessed the intimate moment. Damnit, maybe you shouldnât have gone that far.
âIt was hot, you know. Until Taesan went and ruined all the fun by taking you all for himself,â He pauses to take another sip from his bottle. âLooks like youâve got both of them under your belt, huh? Itâs impressive. Most girls would die to be in your place.â Your skin crawled with the way he was openly referring to you like some sort of sexual object being passed around his friends.
âI didnât hook up with either of them, Heeseung. Donât go around talking about shit that isnât true.â The raise of your voice catches him off-guard, but he doesnât back down from a challenge, especially not if itâs you. Your interactions with him felt like you were the subject of some sick mind-game, one where the only goal was to piss off whoever was in their line of vision, and it was working.Â
âSeeing you get so angry is turning me on, angel. You must have something good if it means they both want a piece of you,â He puts his beer down somewhere before striding over to you, forcing you to step back until your back is flush against the cool countertops. Heâs looking down on you once more, arm resting firmly on the cabinet above you, making you feel more caged in than ever. âWhat do you say, my turn next?âÂ
Someone wolf whistles from behind him, making him drop his act as he turns to see who it came from. Itâs no one you know, but youâre more than grateful for the stranger for giving you an out of the situation you were currently in. You ignore the calls of your name as you push past the group of people trying to come in, trying to distance yourself from Heeseung as quickly as possible.Â
You werenât sure where youâd lose him, ultimately deciding that going outside might be your best bet. Damnit, you didnât think to grab your phone on your way outâ Heeseung was probably still looking for you inside, so maybe now wasnât a good time to go back in there. You could live without it for the time being if it meant avoiding that god-awful conversation. The cool air did little to combat the warmth you were currently feeling, a tightness in your chest you could only describe as unease. Your hands trembled at your side, palms sweater than you realized. Fuck, why were you so overwhelmed right now?
It was foolish for you to think you wouldnât run into one of Taesanâs friends â especially knowing that this was Riwoo and Sunghoâs party â but you didnât expect an interaction of that calibre. You felt humiliated, offended even, for something you never did. The way those words rolled off of Heeseungâs tongue as if he was certain they were true; You hated the way Han Taesan had such a presence in your life after the way you two left off.Â
Thereâs small groups of people scattered around outside, luckily too engrossed in their own circles to notice you practically running out the front door. Trying to calm down your pounding heart, you look around in hopes of finding someone you knew to try and distract yourself, to use them as a get-out-of-jail free card if Heeseung came back around. Itâs all a blur, really, scanning the backs of heads of people you donât know, and feeling insane in the process.Â
God, why do they know so many people? You curse yourself for not thinking to grab your phone amidst your route through the apartment; maybe you couldâve called up Minnie to come save you or something. Your eyes glaze over the strangers' faces once more, anxiety creeping into your stomach until you meet a familiar gaze, one that softens immediately upon seeing you.Â
Han Taesan.Â
Shouldâve figured he was somewhere outside if you didnât see him inside the whole night. Damn it, why did he have to be the only person you could name in the immediate vicinity? Heâs stood in a circle of people passing around a joint, eyes fixed onto you despite the fact that someone was currently talking to him. Taesan mouths something to the girl besides him before hastily making his way over to you, parting the group in half to get past them.Â
Seeing him again for the first time since your argument brought back all the emotions you bottled up after your argument, feeling yourself get choked up immediately. You turn your back to him, not wanting to hold eye contact any longer than you need to, and start walking with no end destination in mind. There werenât many other places you could go, not to mention the fact that your phone and roommate were both still inside the apartment, but that didnât matter right now.Â
âWhere are you going?âÂ
You halt your movements, hearing Taesanâs voice from behind you, picking up his pace in an effort to reach you. You didnât know where you were going in the first place. Turning around, you watch as he closes the distance between you two, nothing but the sound of his footsteps echoing through the air. He stopped only a couple feet away, but the smell of weed lingering on his clothes was strong even from where he was standing.Â
âWhyâd you follow me?â
âUh, I donât actually know. I guess I just wanted to see if we could talk,â He scratches the back of his head, struggling to tell you the truth: he missed you. âYou looked upset back there⊠Just wanted to see if you were okay, yeah?âÂ
âIâm fine, just kind of⊠Annoyed.â Just thinking about the way your conversation with Heeseung escalated frustrated you deeply. Taesan tilts his head in confusion at your admission, scooting backwards in the process, not wanting to invade your personal space. âNot at you, idiot. Well, not directly.â Â
âWhat happened inside? Did someone do something to you? Just tell me who and Iâllââ Just like that, Taesan was ready to storm back towards the apartment to find who made you upset, only stopping when you grabbed his wrist, physically preventing him from going any further.Â
âYouâre doing that thing again.â You drop your hold on him. The loss of your touch plants a pit in his stomach.
âWhat are you talking about?â
âThat thing where you act like you care about me,â The boy frowns at you, clearly upset that you donât believe his genuinity. âStop looking at me like that.â
âBaby, câmon. It was never an act,â Taesan reaches to put his hand on your shoulder, only for you to dodge his movements. He pauses for a moment afterwards, debating on what to say next. âI couldnât fake the way I acted with you, even if I tried.â His confession is hushed, loud enough only for him to hear.
âYou guys brought Heeseung with you, didnât you? He was spewing all this bullshit about how you and Leehan are just dying to get into my pants.â Irritation was written clearly into your outburst. â...Unless, heâs telling the truth. Is that what I am to you guys? A stupid bet or something?â
 âFuck, if I knew you were here I wouldâve tried finding you earlier and none of this wouldâve-â
âWhat difference does it make? Arenât you the same way? What makes you think he wouldnât have said the same shit if you were there with me?â The tension in the air is thick, uncomfortable.  âSay something, Dongmin.â
It stung when he didn't bother to utter a single word.
âMaybe it was stupid for me to think like this, but I never wanted to believe any of those ridiculous things people would say about you,â You canât be bothered to wait for a response from the boy standing across from you, not anymore. âIf I was nothing but a game to you, why do you try so hard to act like Iâm not? If you knew those rumors were right all along, whyâd you even bother dragging this out the whole time?â
âDragging what out?â God, is he dense? Â
âUs, Dongmin! Why the hell would you keep up this act for so long if you never gave a shit about me to begin with?âÂ
â...None of that is true, Y/N.âÂ
âThen why donât you just fucking explain it to me then?â Why canât he tell you Heeseung was wrong? Why was it so hard for him to tell you what you needed to hear?
âMaybe itâd help if you didnât see me as some fucking bad guy all the time everything would make a lot more sense,â Thatâs the thing: You could never see him as the villain, even after all this. Even when he has you questioning the confines of your relationship after each and every interaction, youâve never had it in you to cut it off for good. âI donât know why you would assume the worst of me. You of all people, Y/N.âÂ
Itâs you who wants to believe everyone is wrong about him. How could he have it so wrong?Â
âYou must be joking, right? I know youâve heard it all, Dongmin.â A laugh comes out of your mouth, but youâre both well aware it isnât because youâre jokingâ The circumstances have become so twisted that it was almost humorous. âAbout how you love jumping from girl to girl, refusing to give them the time of day after youâre done with them. I was bound to end up as one of them, right?âÂ
âStop, Y/N.â Taesan pleaded shakily.Â
âI donât even know what to call you anymore. Does it even matter, Dongmin?â Taesan, Dongmin. Maybe you hated when Han Dongmin became Han Taesan. It was naive to think that youâd be able to focus on all the good parts of Dongmin when all the bad qualities of Taesan remained fixed in place.Â
You couldnât stop yourself from continuing, not now. Han Taesan would never fix his issues if he ran away from them, consistently refusing to fix them properly â If you have to be the one to tell him the truth to his face, then so be it. âHave you ever wondered why we always come back to each other like this? Especially when we both know we never get anywhere afterwards?â
 Taesan canât meet your gaze.Â
âThereâs something wrong with the way we work, you know that, right? Youâd be fucking lying to yourself if you really believed what you said back then,â The buzz from the alcohol was running dry, emotions heightened the more you sobered up. âI donât know what kind of misconstrued definition you have for friends, but we were never just friends, Dongmin. You have to understand that much.âÂ
You take a moment to catch your breath, running a hand through your hair in frustration. âI canât assume the worst in you,â It almost pains you to admit that to him; to let him know that at the end of the day, youâre still weak for him, and youâre well aware of the fact. âNo matter how many times you leave me hanging, the way you always do, I always come back to you and I hate myself for it.âÂ
âShit, I donât know why something in me wants to believe that youâre more than what everyone makes you out to beâ and I try, time and time again, to prove myself correct but I canât do anything about you going silent on me all the time, Taesan.â
âFuck, Y/N, I just⊠I canât let you end up like everyone else.â Itâs the first time heâs even attempted speaking up in the past couple minutes. âWhy canât you just trust me on this?â
âIs that all you have to say? What do you want me to make out of that?â How did Taesan expect you to trust him when he gave you nothing to begin with? If he bothered to explain what was going on in his head, maybe, just maybe, you two would be able to fix things. âWhyâs it so hard for you to just tell me?âÂ
âI-I donât know what it is,â His voice is the smallest youâve ever heard it, itâs hard to believe itâs actually coming from him. âIâd tell you in a heartbeat if I understood, Y/N. I really would.âÂ
It occurred to you that Taesan was just as lost as you were when it involved his own emotions: This coversation was going nowhere. Until he came to terms with whatâs been holding himself back, youâre certain of one thing. âI donât want to see you anymore, Taesan.âÂ
And he watches as you shove past him, beginning the trek back to the party all on your own. Even when he averts his gaze, he couldnât help but turn back around, in hopes youâd be looking back too. It was only when your silhouette became lost among the crowd of people that Han Taesan dropped to his knees, gravel harsh against the bare skin exposed by the rips in his jeans, and choked out a sob.Â
How did things get so complicated?
< SUPER SPECIAL TAG 3: @minwrlds my bodacious beloved beautiful b2u beta reader U mean the world to me BTW.
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i would actually do crazy things to have gongfourz in my blunt rotation like ... AAAAAAHHHH OMFFFFFF like head is FUZZY thinking about it.
like wow imagine gongfourz who share a HUGE crush on u showing up to the smoke session ohhh hmy god it's actually over ... the lingering touches as you pass the joint over..... the prolonged eye contact as they smile dopily at u Do they want u or are they just insanely high...? Both?????
AND WOW THEY'D BE SOOOOO GIGGLY. leehan... okay sure he's Resident Giggle Baby in my mind but TAESAN? omfg seeing him so Uncomposed n laughing at every little thing ooooooohhhh iâm so sick iâm so sick #NEEDTHATBAD
even worse if they're COMPETING for ur attention the whole time. mm i imagine taesan would be a lot more discreet about it, like watching you exhale a cloud of smoke from his place on the couch, opening a bottle of water for u & holding it to your mouth for you to drink from when you have cottonmouth
...but leehan is the complete opposite, he's got some sort of physical contact w/ you at ALL times. maybe he leans his head on your shoulder, pretending he's just there to "rest his eyes" but he's using the high as an excuse to be closer to you. or he's pushing the hair out of your face as you roll, the close proximity would've made you nervous if you weren't so out of it to begin with