Love, Lindsay

Seriously looks unreal, took this walking out to the beach from our resort in Turks and Caicos

Scuba diving in Turks and Caicos

I want to start off by stating that I am a firm believer in second chances. I am no where near perfect and it is just human nature to occasionally lose your mind so to speak. With that being said, I found myself in a situation where I started handing out not only second chances but also third, fourth, and fifth chances. I put my emotions through a sickening hell of roller coaster rides and just couldn't seem to get myself off. The man that told me, "I love you but I am not in love with you anymore," wanted to give it another shot. I eventually gave in and decided to put my whole heart into it again. I put myself through four cycles of I don't love you, I realized I don't want to lose you, I want you back, we don't get along, we don't click, I'm not IN love with you. I started thinking that it must be me, what if I had done that differently or what if I could just convince him that he really does love me? I truly believed that I MUST have done something completely wrong to lose love from the man I'd give my life for. I'd never feel happiness again. Oh but was I wrong! The grieving process goes through the stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and then finally reaches the stage of acceptance. I accepted the fact that my loss was actually a gain. I gained my happiness back and not only that but happiness that spawns from myself rather than from another human being and no one can ever take that from me. I have not let myself become bitter and reliant against ever finding love again because I know the man that deserves me will cross my path.